Mr & Mrs Castle
by ghost writer 77
Summary: One-shots of married and family life between Rick and Kate. Something sweet and fluffy for those who like "aww"-moments. *Chapter 62 up* "Look, I messed up by not telling you and I'm sorry for that." He stepped closer, his face taut. "But I'm not going to apologize for trying to keep my family safe."
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I love stories where Rick and Kate are married and really wanted do one myself; even if it's just a fluffy one-shot. And this is exactly what it is. Please forgive me for the crappy title, couldn't think of anything cute.**

**(Updated version - I'm doing chapter titles now, since this is going to be more than a one-time thing)**

**I don't own Castle... unfortunately.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 1 - Where we belong**

_Nikki kicked the gun out of his hand- _

"Nooo."

_Nikki… landed a powerful jab on his jaw. _

"Urgghh… Even worse."

_Nikki…. took off all her clothes and jumped him- _

"Ha… wait 'til Kate sees this."

Rick Castle was sitting in his study in front of his laptop attempting to get some writing done for his fourth Nikki Heat novel. Gina was already setting deadlines and hassling him about it. But he was struggling to find inspiration; this usually happened when his muse was not around to lend a helping hand. He did not go with her with the precint a lot anymore, since he really did not need to any longer and also because he needed to get some work done. _'Mrs. Castle, you really need to get you sexy ass home,' _he thought as he looked at his watch. It was 22h46. Just as the thought crossed his mind, he heard the front door opening and smiled instinctively at the sound.

Kate walked through the door wearily, taking off her jacket and dumping her bag on the kitchen counter. She let out a heavy sigh and rubbed the back of her neck, trying to ease the aching muscles of her shoulders. It was a long and macabre day and she needed some R&R and was sure that her husband would provide that. She was relatively certain that he was not asleep yet and the light streaming through from underneath the door of his study, confirmed her suspicions. He rarely went to bed before she came home.

"Rick!" she called, walking over towards his study.

"In here!" His muzzled voice rang out. She opened the door and saw him feet up on the desk and laptop in his lap. He was wearing his favourite pair of boxers that had the Tasmanian Devil on it and a casual dark blue t-shirt. She also noticed a gameboy lying on top of his desk.

"_Such a man-child," _Kate thought, smiling slightly at the scene. Even though his 9-year-old-on-a-sugar-rush-antics got on her nerves a lot of the time, she found this kid-like side of Rick Castle sweet, adorable and – inexplicably – irresistible.

But tonight she needed more than entertainment and laughs; she needed her husband to provide her a shoulder to cry on after the day she had endured. Murder was hard, but the murder of a child was unbearable.

"Hey sexy," he greeted jovially as his mouth slowly curved into a broad smile. He put his laptop on the desk, got up and walked towards her.

"Hi." Kate returned a weak smile. "Sorry I'm late," she continued, moving to him. He pulled her closer and leaned in for a sweet, but lingering kiss.

"Ah… that's okay. Someone around here needs to work and since it's clearly not me…" Rick flashed another broad grin, but saw the strain on her face and the weariness in her eyes. She was still processing the events of the day and he knew that today must have been particularly difficult. They were working on a case of a 10-year old girl who had been raped and brutally murdered. He knew Kate took cases like this to heart and saw the results of it in her taut reactions.

"Long day, huh?" he asked frowning slightly with concern.

"Yeah, something like that." Kate arched her eyebrows and averted his eyes as she broke from his hold to sit down on the couch. She was with him, but her mind was somewhere else. Rick sat down beside her, watching her intently.

"So… how did it go? Did you get any breaks?" He ventured cautiously, seeing the haunted expression on her face. He knew Kate Beckett (now Castle, of course) well and after years of studying how the different emotions revealed themselves on her face, he had a good idea of what every expression meant. But the one she wore now, he did not see it often. Maybe only the times when her mother's murder was discussed.

"We got the guy…," she started in a subdued tone, fixing a blank stare on the coffee table. Even though he sometimes took things too lightly and made inappropriate jokes, he knew when to keep quiet. And this was one of those moments.

"It was the mother's boyfriend," Kate continued with a clenched jaw as she looked down at her lap. She was unconsciously clasping her hands together, recalling the reaction of the little girl's mother upon hearing what happened to her daughter. She momentarily closed her eyes at the memory.

"Oh," Rick replied quietly. Cases like this were always difficult to process and despite being hard-as-nails, Kate was struggling to come to terms with it.

"You know sometimes I really just hate this job." She looked up at him, blinking away tears. Rick rarely saw her this vulnerable and instinctively moved closer, placing a protective arm around her shoulder. He could almost feel his heart break into a thousand pieces upon seeing the sorrow in his wife's eyes.

"Katie… I'm sorry," he said softly, pulling her to him and kissing the top of her head. He only referred to her as 'Katie' when she was feeling vulnerable or sad and needed comfort. Kate relaxed against him and took in a deep breath, taking in the faint scent of his cologne that still lingered. She felt the tension in her body melt away, feeling the familiar sense of safety when she was with him. They sat quietly for a few moments before she stirred and sat up.

"At least we got the SOB… And he's going away for a _very_ long time," Kate said, running a hand through her hair while fixing her gaze on the couch.

"Good. I'm glad. You know in cases like this, I'm all for the death penalty." He commented grimly before growing thoughtful again. "Hey, you okay?" He lifted her chin and raised his eyebrows, looking at her with concern. She took a few moments before replying.

"Yeah… I am." A smile slowly spread across her face before she continued. "I have you."

"Mh-hmm… You're a lucky girl." Kate raised her eyebrows at the comment, sensing a barrage of bantering coming on.

"Oh really? And why's that Mr. Castle?"

"Well, Mrs. Castle, it's not every woman who can say that they're married to a ridiculously handsome, filthy rich and impossibly talented writer." He flashed her smile while Kate rolled her eyes at him as per usual.

"Trust you to come up with that kind of fiction," Kate said as she stood up.

"Ouch, thanks honey. That's how a wife supports her husband," Rick replied, placing a hand on his chest in mock indignation.

"Yeah, yeah. C'mon Mr. World-Famous-Writer, let's go to bed. I'm tired." She started to make her way towards his office door.

"Ok let me just-" Rick got up and moved towards his desk to pick up the gameboy.

"Richard, don't even think of bringing that gameboy to bed," Kate said over her shoulder as she walked out of his office. He looked up at her with a pout and reluctantly put it back on his desk.

"Spoilsport," he mumbled while following her out of his office. "Why do you always have to be so strict?"

Turning around to face him, Kate replied in a sultry voice.

"Because you like it when I'm strict, Mr. Castle." Rick's eyes grew big and he swallowed hard.

"Oh, you have no idea Mrs. Castle."

* * *

**A/N: So, hope you liked it. Tell me your thoughts and whether I should maybe continue with a bunch of one-shots of Rick and Kate being married. Please review.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and alerts, much appreciated. So this is the second installment of the one-shot series. This one is a little more humorous than fluffy. Hope you enjoy it.**

**Castle, unfortunately, is not mine.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 2 - Valentine's Day**

There were a few things Kate Castle would never admit publically. This included the massive crush she had on Vanilla Ice when she was a teenager, how funny she found her husband's silly antics and how much she actually enjoyed Valentine's Day. Yes, Kate Castle, homicide detective and realist to the point of being a cynic actually liked receiving overpriced flowers, a corny card, fluffy teddy bears and expensive chocolate. She was a woman after all. Therefore, when she awoke the fateful morning of February the 14th, the expectation was that her husband – the undying romantic – would shower her with gifts, or at least make heart-shaped pancakes for breakfast. With this in mind, Kate – after getting ready for work – made her way down to the kitchen in order to see whether Rick was indeed busy with the creation of heart-shaped pancakes. Instead of finding him engaged in this domestic chore, there was no activity in the kitchen. Not even the coffee machine was turned on. Scanning the surroundings, Kate also did not see the big bouquet of flowers she had anticipated nor the fluffy teddy bears or the expensive box of chocolates. Her brow furrowed slightly at this as she stood puzzled in the living room. Knowing her husband was probably in his office typing away, she walked to the study.

"Morning," Kate greeted brightly as she made her way towards where Rick was sitting at his desk. His was still in his pajamas, hair standing in every direction making him look more mischievous than usual. He was typing furiously as storylines for his fourth Nikki Heat novel ran through his mind. For the last few days, Kate would wake up alone in their bed and find Rick working in his office; his writer's block seemingly a thing of the past.

"Hey hon," he greeted only removing his eyes briefly from the screen to look at Kate. She made her way around his chair and wrapping her arms around his shoulders from behind, she bent down and gave him a peck on his stubbled cheek. Rick took in a breath, smelling the cherry scent coming from her with a whisper of a smile forming on his lips. She stood up straight and looked down at the computer screen where words were turned into paragraphs, paragraphs into pages and pages into chapters. Even before they met, Kate loved Rick Castle's books - the plotlines, the characters, the authenticity and most of all the insight that he had shown into the psyche of murder. Now that she knew the man behind the books, she was even more amazed by how he weaved the different elements together to create a story. Adding to this, she had also become part of the process. In fact she was the muse - a title Kate had become immensely proud of.

"So, how is it coming along?" Kate asked while affectionately running a hand through his disheveled hair.

"Uhh... great. Good enough to keep Gina off my back. I got a great idea for a new twist. So seems like inspiration finally hit me." Rick continued to type as Kate made her way to the edge of the desk, proceeding to half-sit on it.

"Okay, I'm glad... Even if it means I wake up alone every morning. If I didn't know better I would've thought that you were having an affair with Nikki," she replied smiling at him playfully.

"Ooh, am I sensing jealousy KC?" Rick looked up at her and gave her a sly smile.

"In your dreams... _kitten,_" Kate said flirtatiously leaning forward towards him.

"In my dreams Detective, you're naked and there's whipped cream involved," Rick quickly said with a smirk, earning an eye-roll from his wife.

"Is that all you ever think about?" she asked with a slight chuckle.

"Well what do you expect me to think about when you come in here to distract me?" Rick leaned back in his chair and raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her. "Shouldn't you be at the office? Fighting crime?" Kate, still expecting a Valentine's gift or some sort of gesture along those lines, quirked one of her eyebrows up in surprise.

"Wow, can't wait to get rid of me, huh?" she replied careful not to indicate that she, tough detective, was actually waiting for her husband to pull out some corny gift.

"With you around I will only be thinking about us being naked with whipped cream," Rick replied with a mischievous smile. "Or better yet - body chocolate!" His eyes lit up as the idea crossed his mind earning yet another eye-roll from Kate.

"Okay, okay. I'm going." Kate held up her hands, realising Rick probably forgot all about Valentine's Day. "I'll see you later." She leaned in for a lingering kiss before walking out of the office.

Hearing the front door shut, a sly smile slowly formed on Rick Castle lips. _"It should be there by now,_" he thought glancing at his watch.

XXXXX

Kate walked through the doors of the bull-pen still feeling a little disappointed that Rick had forgotten about Valentine's Day. It also didn't help to see heart-shaped balloons and fat cupids everywhere. But as she walked past a few uniforms and other officers she noticed everyone gazing at her and the odd one - usually a woman - smiling at her strangely.

Then she saw it. On her desk a basket with a massive bouquet of red roses and balloons attached to it. Next to it there was box of chocolates and a fluffy bear. Kate could feel the heat rise to her cheeks at this _very _public display of affection. And she also knew who was responsible - the incorrigible, 9-year-old-on-a-sugar-rush, man-child love of her life. Seeing Ryan and Esposito smirking at her as she approached her desk, Kate felt her cheeks glow with even more heat.

"Hi guys," she mumbled, trying to hide her obvious embarassment. She knew that they would have a field-day with this.

"Well hello Detective Beckett. Such a lovely morning, don't you think?" Esposito greeted with a grin.

"Love just seems to be in the air, doesn't it?" Ryan quipped with a smirk, gesturing with his hands toward the balloons.

"Yeah, yeah. Okay.. so I have a huge bouquet of roses, balloons, chocolate and a... fluffy bear on my desk," Kate said with a slight frown as she picked up the teddy bear. "What's the big deal?"

"We would have never have guessed you to be a Valentine's Day-type of girl, Beckett," Esposito added still grinning at her. Kate just rolled her eyes and shook her head as she searched for a card in the flower arrangement.

"Or one of those women who liked, a-hem, fluffy teddy bears," Ryan said picking up the teddy bear.

"Shut up," Kate murmured as she snatched the teddy bear from Ryan. "You know how Castle can be."

"Hey Esposito have you ever done anything like this for a girl?"

"No," Esposito answered with a contemptous snort. "Bet you have though."

"Nah, maybe just roses. I don't do Valentine's Day, man," Ryan answered, trying to sound a little more macho than usual.

"Oh really Kevin? What about last year when you got Jenny a bag full of teddy bears and she got you the coffee mug with 'world's greatest husband' on it?" Kate asked with a raised eyebrow causing Ryan to blush crimson red and Esposito to burst out in laughter. After Esposito calmed himself, Kate continued.

"By the way, Javier, Lanie told me about the dozen roses and her favourite Belgium chocolate she got. Very thoughtful of you." Kate smirked at him as the smile dropped from his face. "I think you boys have work to do," she added, still grinning at them. Her colleagues, considerably more humble now than a few moments before, made their way back to their desks.

Kate turned her attention to the card in her hands and opened it.

_You thought I forgot, didn't you? Tsk, tsk. I know, despite your best efforts to deny it, Detective, how much you love V-day. Hence the PDA. And of course, it was done to brighten your day. Don't worry, KC, your secret is safe with me._

_Love you,_

_RC_

_By the way - we're getting naked tonight! Sexy lingerie is mandatory._

Kate walked into the break room and punched in the familiar number, slightly biting her lower lip as a grin spread across her face.

"Morning Mrs. Castle. Miss me already?" Rick greeted smugly, a smirk audible in his voice.

"Ah, maybe.. a little. Anyway, I'm just calling to say that some nut desecrated my desk with flowers and teddy bears. It almost looks like Cupid threw up on it," Kate said, smiling unconsciously.

"Ahh no, sweetie. I'm sorry. Who would do such a thing?" Rick replied in mock seriousness.

"I don't know, I'm at a loss," Kate continued the joke. "But I'll tell you one thing-"

"Mmm-hmm?"

"If I get him, he's gonna pay," Kate said, lowering her tone.

"Oh, do tell, Detective," Rick replied excitedly, hearing the seductive tone in his wife's voice.

"I'm not at liberty to discuss it, but I will only say this." Her voice dived a few decibels, taking on a husky tone. "- it involves Victoria's Secret and handcuffs. And I'm afraid it could get a little _wild _and _kinky._" Kate could practically hear Rick suck in a breath and swallowing hard. After a few moments of trying to gather himself, he replied with a slightly shaky voice.

"Don't forget the whipped cream."

* * *

**A/N: Again, reviews will be appreciated. The next one will be a bit more angsty and more fluffy. Thanks for reading.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews! I'm happy that you're enjoying this series, because I enjoy writing it. Anywho, this one - like I said at the end of chapter 2 - is a bit angsty and serious. But don't worry, there's plenty of fluff to be had. This chapter is near to a M-rating, just precautionary. **

**Enjoy! (This is an updated version - I made a few small changes in the dialogue in the end, nothing major)**

**Castle - not mine. *Sigh***

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 3 – Don't let me go**

Richard Castle ran as he never did before in his life. Bursting past people and almost crashing into objects, he sprinted down the corridors of St. Mary's hospital, all the while replaying Esposito's words in his mind.

"_Rick, we're at St. Mary's… Kate's been shot."_

Numbness arrested his senses while dread and horror engulfed him as the sentence sunk in. He did not let Javier finish and dropped the phone before rushing out the door.

On his way to the hospital, Rick's mind went back to the morning's events; he and Kate had an argument about his latest book tour just before she left for work. She was not happy that it would be four weeks long and he was upset that she would not be joining him. For the past few days, they had both been edgy – Rick was under pressure because of his book launch and Kate had difficulty with the case she was working on. Eventually, it all came to a climax and blossomed into a full-blown fight that morning. _Now_, all of that did not matter. It was insignificant and trivial and pointless.

_'As long as she's okay. As long as she's okay.'_ The thought ran through his mind like a fervent prayer. He came to an abrupt halt at a nurses' station causing the occupant to jump a little at his sudden presence.

"I'm looking for a Kate Castle, or Beckett or Detective Beck-" he spurted out; his voice cracking with fear and his eyes wide with intense anxiety.

"Castle!" Rick quickly spun around at the sound of his name and saw Esposito and Ryan in the waiting area. Ignoring the nurse's attempted reply, he hurriedly made his way to the two men.

"Is she okay? Where's Kate?" Panic stifled his voice as the questions followed each other in quick succession.

"The doctor is examining her, but-" Esposito started to answer, but was interrupted by Rick.

"You said she got shot. Is- is she okay?" Rick asked, his eyes darting between the two men pleadingly.

"She's fine, Castle. She had her vest on, but a bullet grazed her upper arm, so they're just looking at that," Ryan answered, patting Rick's shoulder.

"Don't worry bro, Beckett is a tough cookie," Esposito added, plastering a smile across his face even though it did not reach his eyes. A corner of Rick's mouth unwillingly curved up when Javier referred to Kate as a 'tough cookie'.

Rick let out the breath he had been holding and bent forward, resting his hands on his knees while his head hung downwards.

"Oh thank God" He breathed, closing his eyes momentarily. "Wha- what happened?" he asked standing up.

"We went to arrest the perp and the stupid SOB – without warning – opened fire. Unfortunately, a civilian got in the way and well Kate jumped in front of her and…" Ryan's voice trailed off, clearly still affected by what happened.

"She saved the woman's life," Esposito continued, his voice suddenly full of emotion.

"_Shit_..." Rick commented, his face contorting at the thought of his wife being shot at. "And the bastard who did this? What happened to him?" he asked, fury suddenly rising from the pit of his stomach.

"He got a bullet in the head," Ryan answered flatly.

"Beckett shot him," Esposito added grimly. Rick sighed and ran a hand over the back of his head and neck, turning his eyes to the floor.

"I- I'm gonna go see where is," he said quietly after a few moments while the two detectives nodded in response.

As he approached the nurses' station for the second time to find out where Kate was, he noticed a familiar figure out of the corner of his eye. When he saw her, Rick once more abandoned the nurse mid-sentence, and quickly made his way towards his wife who was standing a few metres away down in the corridor. She had just come out of the examining room and became aware of someone walking towards her. A considerably paler Kate let out a relieved breath and smiled tentatively as Rick swiftly walk/ran towards her. Upon reaching her, Rick enveloped her - without words - into a tight embrace; pulling her slender frame impossibly close to his larger one.

"Thank God," he murmured into her hair while placing quick, tender kisses on her head, forehead and temple. Pulling away slightly, he framed her face with his hands and locked his eyes with hers.

"You scared the hell out of me, KC," Rick stated simply; his voice quiet, but filled with raw emotion. Kate diverted her eyes to his chest with a sigh and rested her hands on his forearms.

"I'm sorry, RC. I didn't mean to scare you," she replied softly, gazing up at him and noticing his strained expression. "Or, you know, get shot at today," Kate added sarcastically with a slight smile in an effort to lighten the mood. Rick did not return the smile, but instead leaned forward to meet her lips in a soft, but lingering kiss.

"C'mon, let's get you home." He placed an arm around her shoulder and a hand on her injured upper arm causing Kate to wince in pain.

"_Ow_!"

"Oh! Sorry!" Rick exclaimed, immediately releasing the hold he had on her arm. "Please don't hurt me," he added after a few moments. He gave her his best puppy-dog look, causing Kate to role her eyes at him as per usual.

"You're forgiven. Just remember, you have to be nice to me now. I'm not a well woman." Kate smiled at him despite herself; a flicker of playfulness back in her voice.

"I'm always nice to you," Rick replied with a slight pout, taking her small hand in his and giving it a squeeze. Even though his facial features indicated a smile, his eyes betrayed the fear that had gripped his heart.

Katherine Castle was his 'one-and-done' and Rick knew that if he lost her, it would devastate him beyond recovery.

XXXXX

"I'm gonna take a shower. Why don't you order us some Chinese or something," Kate said, flashing her husband a tentative smile. Instead of making a typical Caslte suggestion - laced with sexual innuendo - of taking a shower together, he only meekly nodded in agreement. They had just arrived home, both feeling weary and emotionally drained; albeit careful not to reveal what they felt to one another. The ride home had been quiet with both of them engrossed in thought. Kate replayed the events of the day in her mind, while Rick was contemplating the 'what ifs'. She also noticed that he was was touching her more than usual, almost as if he was making sure that she was really alive and well.

Kate dragged herself upstairs to their bedroom; grateful to have a few moments alone with her thoughts. She stepped into the bathroom and started to remove her clothes which reeked of gunfire and blood. Ignoring the tears that began to blur her vision, she slowly undid the buttons of her shirt while staring at nothing in particular on the wall. It was only when she was standing under the scorching hot current of water that it hit her - she took someone's life today and almost lost her own. As the realisation set in, uncotrollable sobs tore through her body until she was sitting on the shower floor clutching at her knees for comfort.

_Meanwhile..._

Rick sat on the edge of the bed, listening to the faint splashing of water coming from the bathroom. He only came in a few moments before, not to interrupt Kate, but just, frankly, to be nearer to her. Not for her sake, but for his own peace of mind. While absent-mindedly scanning the room, a large wedding photo of them on the wall caught his eye. Looking at the two blissfully happy people in the picture, Rick's lips briefly pulled upwards. They had so many dreams and plans for the future – taking long vacations on exotic islands, buying a house along the French Riviera and, eventually, raising a family. They also made promises. _'For better or worse. In sickness and in health. 'Til death do us part.' _

"Til death do us part," Rick murmured out loud before being shaken from his thoughts at the sound of the bathroom door opening. Kate, wet-haired and clothed in a bathrobe, stepped out and saw her husband sitting on the edge of the bed. They looked at each other for a few seconds before she went over to sit next to him in silence. After a few moments, Rick took her hand in his and weaved their fingers together.

"You almost died today," he said softly, looking down at their intertwined fingers while gently rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand.

"Unfortunately for you, the guy was a bad shot." Rick's head snapped up and he stared at her for a moment.

"Richard, I'm fine-" Kate started in a softened tone seeing his reaction and placed her free hand over their interwined ones.

"Esposito told me that you jumped in front of someone," Rick interrupted her, his eyes drilling into hers. He was bizarrely angry with her that she put her life at risk for a stranger.

"Yeah... If I hadn't, she would have been shot. I was doing my job-" Kate nodded slowly, her eyebrows knitting briefly as she spoke.

"You could've gotten killed," he retorted angrily, looking at her intently. Kate's expression softened, as her eyes drifted downwards. A few moments passed by before she looked up at him again, her eyes suddenly moist.

"I know what happened. I, I know better than anyone how close I came to dying today... But, Rick." She placed a hand on his cheek. "-I didn't. I'm right here"

"I should have been with you today-" He looked up at her, his expression serious.

"You're here _now,_" Kate interrupted, taking his face in between her hands. "I don't need you to save me or protect me or stop bullets for me... I _need_ you to love me," Kate continued in a whisper, her plea barely audible. "Just love me, Rick." She leaned in for a slow, deep kiss.

He broke from the kiss and started to tug at the belt of her robe; his movements slow and deft. Keeping eye contact, he slid the robe off her shoulders to reveal her bare skin. He moved towards her neck and shoulders, placing feathery kisses on her collar bone, up her neck and along her jaw line; all the while pushing her down onto the bed. The usual playfulness and laughing were replaced by silence and gentle caresses.

After a few minutes, they were both naked with Rick hovering over his wife. He studied her lovely features closely while tracing the outline of her jaw with his fingers. Kate slinked her arms around his neck, pulling him down towards her.

"I love you," Rick said softly as Kate wrapped her legs tightly around his waist. The traumatic events of the day seemed to disappear in this moment as they slowly moved in unison, making love.

Tonight they were not Richard Castle or Detective Beckett, but simply Rick and Kate - friends, partners and lovers.

XXXXX

"Wow, I didn't realise I was that hungry," Kate commented after taking the last bite of her chow mein. Rick, with his elbow propped on the counter and his head resting on his hand, was watching her. They were in the kitchen sitting at the kitchen table top, finally eating the Chinese take-out he had ordered two hours before. Kate had one of Rick's dress shirts on, while he was only in his Sylvester and Tweety boxer.

"Why do you think I almost ordered everyting on the menu?" Rick grinned at her; the usual playful glint in his eyes seemingly recovered. Kate only shook her head at him and smiled, before growing thougthful again. He noticed the change in her demeanor and frowned.

"Hey, what's going on inside that pretty lil' head of yours?" He took hold of her hand, smiling slightly at her.

Shaken from her thougths, Kate returned a tentative smile, unsure how to proceed.

"Uh, well,.. life is short and... we can't predict what's going to happen next," she started, running a hand nervously through her hair. "_Sooo_... I, I was thinking that we should maybe... you know start to." She took a breath before continuing. "_A__dd_ to the Castle family." Kate looked up at him expectantly, biting her lower lip and arching her eyebrows slightly. A grin teased Rick's lips, not sure that what he was hearing was real.

"Do you mean we should get like a puppy or a kitten?" He asked, playing dumb while Kate gave him a longsuffering eye-roll. "_Or_, Detective, is this your way of saying that you want to make little Castle babies with me?" A teasing smile spread across his face as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

Kate stepped closer to him and moved her arms around his neck as a bright smile engulfed her features.

"Yes, I'm saying that I want to make beautiful little Castle babies with you... Starting right now." She broke from his hold and dragged him, by hand, laughing up the stairs.

X-X-X-X

_Picture, you're the queen of everything, as far as the eye could see under your command._

_I will be your guardian when all is crumbling, steady your hand._

_

* * *

_

**A/N: Thanks for reading. I found this chapter quite challenging due to the angstiness (is that a word?) and the intimate scene at the end (*cringe a little*). I hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you think. Also, if there is anything you would like to see in these one-shots, let me know.**

**P. S. the title of the chapter is a from a beautiful song by the Fray, 'Never say never' and the lyrics at the end of the chapter was taken from the song.**


	4. Chapter 4

****

A/N: So here's chapter 4, filled with family-related fluffiness as promised. It's pretty darn fluffy; I figured after the last chapter that we all needed some happiness. And it's long, really long. Thank you all for the reviews, _muchas gracias. _

**Enjoy! And review please... or add to your story alerts.**

**Castle is obviously not mine. If it was, I would be filthy rich and not writing fic about Beckett and Castle being together, because they would be already. _Duh_.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 4 - Pitter Patter**

"_Clean up in aisle five! Clean up in aisle five!"_

Kate was shaken from her thoughts by the announcement – she was standing with a pregnancy test in her hands while considering the different product options in front of her. Nerves fluttered in her stomach as the realization set in that she was actually going to take a pregnancy test. She Kate (Beckett) Castle was possibly pregnant... with Richard Castle's baby. She was a week late and had strange bouts of nausea, finally concluding that their recent - and frequent - efforts to enlarge the Castle-clan must have yielded a result. A smile pulled her lips upward as sudden excitement took hold of her. Obviously, Rick didn't know that she suspected that a little Castle was forming inside of her. He would _only_ be informed if she was certain – hence the three different pregnancy tests already in the basket hung around the bend of her arm. The only person that knew about this was Lanie, who unsurprisingly completely freaked out due to an overdose of happiness. She was already referring to herself as Aunt Lanie and speaking to Kate's stomach despite being informed that nothing was confirmed… _yet_.

Taking a deep breath, Kate placed the box in the basket - bringing the total to four - and made her way to the to the paypoint. She caught herself smiling every few seconds and thinking about possible colour schemes for the nursery, baby names, but most of all, the new role she would assume. At this thought, a broad smile spread across her features as her eyes lit up with anticipation.

XXXX

Kate was met by loud music – more specifically AC/DC's Thunderstruck – as she walked through the door of the loft, keys in hand. She frowned slightly, knowing that her husband was probably bored and probably playing guitar hero in his office. He was taking time off from writing the Nikki Heat series since the book tour finished about two weeks ago. Usually when he was alone and bored, Rick would let the 12-year old boy inside of him loose - he had a whole closet full of remote cars and planes, Xbox-games, cool gadgets (including laser tag equipment), comic books and of course legendary action figures. Obviously, his wife - the ignorant female adult that she was - just didn't seem to get the sheer awesomeness of this sacred and treasured collection of items.

"Hellllooo! Rick?... I'm home," she yelled, attempting to transcend the booming music. When no reply came, she placed the bags and keys in her hand on the kitchen counter and walked over to the office where the noise was coming from.

Sure enough, Rick was doing his upmost best to mimic Jimmy Hendrix while head-banging furiously to the rock tune. He was so engrossed in pretending to be a rock star that it took him a whole two minutes to realize that his smirking wife was watching on in amusement. When he noticed her, he smiled sheepishly and turned the music down.

"Oh don't stop at my account... _rock star,_" Kate said, smirking at him.

"So if I'm a rock star, that means that you're my groupie, right?" Rick replied walking over to her, on the way discarding the guitar hero instrument on the couch.

"That depends," Kate retorted as Rick wrapped his arms around her waist, clasping his hands together at the back. She in turn, leisurely wrapped her arms around his neck.

"On what?" His brow furrowed as he looked down on her. He noticed the playfulness in her green eyes and the teasing way she was licking her lips.

"Well, on if you're any good," Kate replied, slightly biting her lower lip. The flirtatious swordplay and friendly banter that had become the defining features of their relationship, only grew stronger as the years went by.

"What? Do you doubt my rock star status? Didn't you just see my amazing performance? I was _awesome,_" he continued the joke, frowning at her in mock displeasure. Kate only rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Shut up and kiss me." He complied immediately, enclosing his lips in and around her mouth in a deep, sensual kiss. He started to fiddle with the buttons at the bottom of her shirt, but was stopped when Kate took a hold of his hands and broke from the kiss. She glanced down at her watch (her father's watch) and looked back up to him.

"Sorry sweetie, it's 16h30 and Lex will be here at 17h00. So unless you want to put your daughter in years of therapy, I suggest we postpone our little game for later tonight."

"Oh, but it's not a game KC. We're making a baby. Remember? And as far as I can recall _you_ said that we should, and I quote, 'use every opportunity we can' to do that. I'm only complying with your request," Rick replied unfazed, trying to take hold of her again. Kate laughed as he wrapped his arms around her waist once more.

"Nice try Mr. Castle, but... no."

"Eh, was worth a try." He gave her a peck on the lips before releasing her. "Tonight, though, you and me are getting naked," he continued waggling his eyebrows at her while gesturing between himself and Kate. They proceeded to walk out of the office and move into the kitchen.

"Damn, Castle, is that all you _ever_ think about?" Kate asked teasingly with a slight chuckle. He took a few seconds to think before replying.

"_Uhmmmm_... yeah pretty much," Rick said casually with a shrug earning a second eye-roll from Kate.

"Have you heard anything from Lex yet?" Kate asked as she took a seat at the counter; Rick was taking out two cups from the cupboard.

"Uhh, she called about an hour ago. Said that she was just going to drop off one of her girlfriends and come straight here... Espresso or filter?"

"Uh, I-I... Can I get some tea instead please?" She answered a little flustered, the bag with pregnancy tests on the counter catching her eye. Rick frowned slightly at the request; Kate very rarely drank tea and was basically a caffeine-junkie.

"Okay," he answered with a slight shrug, not taking too much notice of her seemingly simple request. Kate watched her husband intently, her elbow propped up on the kitchen counter and her head resting in her hand. She noticed an extra spring in his step and glint in his eyes and she knew why: his little girl was coming home. Kate had partly fallen in love with Richard Castle because of the wonderful father he was to Alexis. She found the paternal side of Rick adorable, sweet and very appealing. Before she could help herself, Kate's mind drifted to fantasies of Rick softly reading stories to their baby, running around in the park with a mini-version of her and playing lazer tag with a mini-version of him. He noticed that she was watching him curiously and his mouth twitched upward.

"Thinking of me naked again, Detective?" He asked, his voice laced with humor. Kate only returned a lazy smile.

"You wish, Castle," she replied as he placed the cup in front of her.

"Uh-huh, _sure_. I know you have a dirty mind, KC. Not that I have a problem with that... To the contrary."

"Ok Rick, watch me closely because I'm gonna roll my eyes now." They shared a laugh before slipping into comfortable silence for a few minutes while drinking the hot beverages.

"You've really missed her, haven't you? Lex I mean," Kate stated, breaking the silence. Rick looked up at her and a warm smile spread across his features as he thought about his daughter. Rick Castle had certain smiles for the women in his life - for his mother usually a longsuffering, gentle grin; for his wife usually a sultry, teasing smirk; and for his daughter usually a warm, beaming smile that reached his eyes.

"Yes, I have," he answered quietly resting his eyes on the mug in his hands, his voice filled with fatherly affection.

"Me too," Kate said softly. She had come to love Alexis as a daughter, even though she never thought of herself as Alexis' mother. They had formed a special bond over the years and had, in fact, become close confidants.

Rick watched her closely and saw the affection manifested in her expression. Kate had been a wonderful role-model for his daughter and Alexis had the upmost respect for her stepmother. He was never worried about whether they would get along, because, unlike Gina, Kate had come to love Alexis as a daughter. He was also certain that Kate would make a fantastic mother and couldn't wait to get and see her pregnant. Noticing her husband's lingering gaze, Kate frowned in confusion.

"What?" She asked puzzled. Rick tilted his head slightly while his mouth revealed a remnant of a smile before taking her hand in his, stroking his thumb over the back of her hand.

"Nothing... just that you are going to make a wonderful mother, Katherine," he answered sincerely, his expression tender. He rarely called her Katherine and when he did it was usually reserved for moments where he revealed his heart to her. Kate suddenly felt emotional, fully aware that she might well be pregnant already.

"Thank you," she replied quietly, her eyes moist with tears. Rick tugged a strand of hair behind her ear and leaned in to give her a soft kiss. A knock on the door interrupted the intimate moment as they turned their attention to the door. Rick's eyes lit up and excitement spread across his features as he quickly made his way towards the door.

"Ah my girl is home!" he greeted as he opened the door and saw Alexis standing on the other side. He immediately gathered her up in a tight hug while kissing her head.

"Hey dad," Alexis greeted with a bright smile.

"Oh I've missed you Pumpkin," Rick said with shut eyes while he held his daughter tight; he did not let go for several moments. The two women only exchanged looks and smiled.

"Dad-"

"Mmmmhh?"

"Can I say hello to Kate as well now?"

"Oh sorry, yeah of course," he replied releasing her from the tight hug.

"Hey sweetie," Kate greeted, smiling broadly.

"Hey," Alexis greeted stepping into a firm hug.

"So, what's new with you guys?"

XXXX

"...We had to jump over the fence to chase after the guy, because well Esposito and Ryan weren't close enough." The three Castles were hoarded in the kitchen with empty pizza boxes strewn over the counter while Kate was busy relaying a precint-related story. "So I go over first and your dad... well let's say he left a little Armani souvenir on the fence." The two women burst out laughing while Rick only shook his head, smiling scornfully.

"Wow Dad, you seem to be getting a little old for that," Alexis commented with a smirk.

"I'm not old, thank you very much. I could give you a run for your money missy," Rick replied in mock seriousness, pointing a finger at his daughter. "Besides, I thought you were on my side."

"Oh but I am Dad. Always."

"Gmmff, yeah sure. You two always conspire against me."

"Aww, poor baby," Kate commented sarcastically while running a hand through his hair.

"By the way, just to make it clear, that fence was high and the suspect was armed which is kinda dangerous, okay? Furthermore, I don't have _any_ police training-"

"No, no Mr. Castle, you couldn't get over that fence because you're unfit and a litte out of shape," Kate interrupted, gently slapping Rick's arm with a chuckle.

"That is not true! I, I do a lot of stuff... I have taut muscles," Rick was flexing his biceps. "Feel here."

"I know how your muscles feel, Castle," Kate retorted with a smile.

"And you seem _very_ satisfied with them, Detective," Rick quipped while slightly arching his eyebrows, once again causing Kate to roll her eyes at him.

"Anyway, jumping over a fence has _nothing_ to do with muscles, Castle."

"Yeah it does!"

"Doesn't."

"Does."

"_Doesn't._"

"Oh come on-"

"Do I look like a body-builder to you?" Kate interrupted arching her eyebrows.

"_Nooo_... but you have a very nice bo- very nice muscles, Detective." He flashed her a teasing smirk before leaning in to peck her cheek.

"Shut up," Kate mumbled with a self-conscious smile while blushing slightly.

Alexis only watched the flirtatious swordplay between her father and Kate in amusement and smiled at the scene. Her father had never been happier with anyone else and she knew that Kate was the best thing to ever happen to their family. She loved her stepmother and considered her to be a close friend.

"Does anyone want some hot chocolate? I kinda feel like some," Alexis said, getting off from the stool where she was sitting.

"Only if you make it with the little marshmellows," Rick answered almost immediately.

"Sure Dad. Kate?"

"Uh... no thanks sweetie, I think I'm gonna take a shower." Kate wanted to give Rick and Alexis a few minutes on their own to catch up and was sensitive enough to realise that they both needed it.

"So, if I don't see you again, Lex, goodnight," she said, getting off her seat and moving closely behind Rick with her hands placed on his shoulders.

"Ok, sleep tight Kate," Alexis answered with a smile.

"Hey, you're not going to bed yet are you?" Rick asked, his brow furrowing in confusion. He took hold of her hand and pulled her closer to him. "I mean we kinda have a date," he continued in a whisper which only Kate could hear.

"Don't worry, I'll wait up," Kate replied quietly with a sly smile and a wink before giving him a quick kiss.

Kate smiled as she heard father and daughter laughing while making her way up the stairs. _'I cannot wait to add to this family.' _She thought placing a hand on her stomach.

XXXX

_Twenty minutes later..._

Kate was sitting on the edge of the bath tub after taking a long shower. She was holding one of the pregnancy tests in her hand and was busy reading the instructions; she hid the bag with pregnancy tests in the bathroom earlier the evening. She decided that while Rick and Alexis were busy bonding downstairs, that she would take the opportunity to find out whether she was indeed expecting. Nervous excitement churned her stomach while a broad smile threatened to engulf her features.

"Kate?" She fumbled with the box upon hearing Rick calling her name.

"Uh, I- I'm in here," she replied flustered as she scurried to hide the pregnancy tests.

"What are you doing in there? Putting on sexy lingerie? I wouldn't mind... hint-hint!" She could here the teasing smirk in his muffled voice on the other side of the door and he could basically see her eye roll. "Don't keep me waiting too long though"

"I'm coming," Kate replied before opening the door.

"Oh there are so many-" Rick commented with a sly smile before being cut off as his wife swiftly put a hand over his mouth.

"Richard Castle, you are like an impossible teenager!" Kate hissed with an exasperated laugh before removing her hand from his mouth.

"More like a really horny teenager," he quipped while feeling her up. Kate wrapped her arms around his neck and stood on her toes in order to lock her mouth with his.

"You smell like cherries," Rick mumbled while placing soft kisses in her neck and along her jaw line.

"Mmm-hmm," Kate commented with closed eyes before breaking from the embrace. Taking his hand, she dragged him towards the bed.

"C'mon Mr. Castle, there's work to done."

"Ay ay Detective!"

XXXX

_Positive. Positive. Positive. Positive_. All four tests confirmed it. Kate Caslte was pregnant. And she was ecstatically happy about it.

But for the time being she wasn't able to share the good news with anyone. It was just past 9am on Saturday and Kate was alone in the loft; Rick and Alexis went out to take a stroll in the park, leaving her to sleep in. She would have to wait a while longer before she could break the news to her husband because she and Alexis had planned a shopping trip - a.k.a girls' bonding time - when they got back from the park. With this in mind, Kate carefully disposed of the pregnancy tests and started to get dressed, all the while struggling to keep a smile from her lips.

She was applying the last touches of her makeup when she heard Rick and Alexis entering the loft.

"Greatest movie of all time?" Rick asked as he and his daughter walked through the door; bear claws and lattes in hand.

Alexis took a few contemplative moments before answering.

"Gone with the Wind."

"Oh come on! Gone with the- oh please. That is such a girly answer," Rick exclaimed in disdain.

"Dad, I am a girl." Alexis pointed out with a chuckle.

"What are we talking about?" Kate asked as she walked down the stairs.

"Oh Dad and I are just having a friendly discussion about what the best movie of all time is," Alexis answered.

"Hey," Kate greeted her husband with a peck on the lips. "So what is it?"

"Gone with the Wind."

"Star Wars 1977." Father and daughter answered simulteanously.

"I'm with Lex on this one... Geekboy," Kate commented with a smile.

"Oh _please_. Star Wars is the greatest film franchise of all time, nothing beats it," Rick replied earnestly.

"Yeah well, _nothing_ beats Rhett Butler and Scarlett O'Hara's epic love story."

"Thanks Kate, my point exactly," Alexis added. Rick flashed his wife and daughter a disapproving look.

"Again, ganging up on me," he mumbled while taking out the bear claws and handing a latte to Kate.

"Uh, I- you have it. I don't want something now," Kate answered as Rick handed her the cup. He looked at her in confusion, not quite comprehending why she was rejecting coffee in the morning. Usually she couldn't function without her daily dosage of caffeine.

"You sure?"

"Yeah... So Lex are you ready?" Kate turned towards her stepdaughter, largely in an effort to change the topic.

"Yip, I'm ready if you are."

"Where are you two going?" Rick asked before taking a sip of the latte.

"Shopping," Kate answered with a broad smile.

"You're leaving me alone?" he asked with a slight pout.

"Don't worry, we won't be the whole day," Kate answered while taking her purse.

"Just a few hours" Alexis added with a smile. "Bye Dad"

"Bye... and behave yourself." Kate leaned in to give Ric.k a kiss on the cheek before heading to the front door.

"Always. Have fun," Rick replied with a grin. "Bring me something!" he called before they were out of the door. A smile slowly formed on his lips as he thought about two of the most important women in his life, but it quickly disappeared.

"Gone with the Wind. _Please._"

XXXX

"We may have something in that size Miss Castle. Would you like me to show it to you?" A friendly boutique assitant asked, knowing full well who the Castle women were.

"Yes please," Alexis answered looking at Kate.

"Oh you go ahead sweetie, I'll wait here."

Alexis and Kate were making their rounds in the boutiques and shops after catching up over lunch. Alexis told her about Harvard, her favourite subjects, her plans for the future and student life while Kate listened on with keen interest. Kate, on the other hand, informed her about everyone at the precint, placing specific focus on Javier and Lanie's budding romance and her father's book tour. She didn't mention anything about her and Rick's plans to 'enlarge' the Castle family or the small matter of her pregnancy - a fact she only discovered a few hours before.

Walking through the shop, Kate spotted the baby section and moved towards it. She was unconsciously rubbing her stomach as she looked at the miniature clothing. She stopped at the shoes section and removed a pair of small, white slipper-like shoes. _'So adorable'_ She was smiling, not aware that Alexis was standing a few feet away and watching her.

"Uh Kate?" Alexis ventured closer, a tentative smile pulling her lips upward. Kate's head snapped up at the interruption and she smiled at her stepdaughter.

"So what are you doing in the baby section?" Alexis asked, already fully aware that her father and Kate were trying for a baby; Rick had told her and she was over the moon upon hearing the news.

"Uhmm," Kate started with a smile while focusing on the small, white shoes in her hand. "I, well-"

"You're pregnant?" Kate took a few moments before answering, not taking her eyes off the item in her hands.

"Yes, Lex, I'm pregnant" she answered softly, looking up while a beaming smile spread across her face. Alexis' eyes grew wide as a bright smile engulfed her features.

"Oh my gosh! This is sooo amazing!" She wrapped her arms around a laughing Kate, practically bouncing off the ground. "I'm going to be a big sister! I can't believe it. Congratulations!"

"Thanks sweetie" Kate replied. "It feels so unreal, but, wow, just amazing"

"When did you find out?" Alexis asked, her blue eyes glistening with excitement.

"This morning actually. While you guys were out."

"And you're sure?"

"Yep. I took four pregnancy tests and they were all positive."

"And Dad? He doesn't know yet?"

"No, I'm planning on telling him later today."

"You know he is gonna be totally out-of-his-mind happy, right?"

"Mmm-hmm," Kate replied with a broad smile while imagining how excited Rick will be upon hearing the good tidings. As she glanced at the small shoes in her hands, an idea as to how to tell him popped into her head.

XXXX

"Hey you're back earlier than I expected," Rick greeted as Kate walked through the door. He was lounging on the couch, watching Star Wars (1977) partly out of boredom and partly to prove his point that it was the greatest movie of all time.

"Well my shoes were starting to kill me," Kate replied. She noticed the remote-controlled miniature Ferrari next to the couch and smiled to herself. _'Boys wll be boys.'_

"Where's Alexis?" he asked, sitting up.

"Uh, she's meeting some of her friends for coffee."

"Oh, okay... so we have the afternoon for ourselves?" he waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively while she only flashed him her longsuffering look.

"Before we get to _that_... I have something for you." Kate pulled out a gift bag and held it out towards him. He quickly got up with the enthusiasm of a 12-year-old.

"Really? Is it _Halo_? Oh, oh! Or is _Unchartered: Drake's Fortune_? 'Cause that will be so totally _awesome_!" He rambled on in anticipation like a kid on Christmas morning.

"No, but I think this is going to be even better," Kate replied with a smile as he took the bag from her.

"Well, very little is greater than that," he commented absent-mindedly while searching the gift bag and pulling out two white, baby shoes. "Baby shoes," he commented flatly, as his brow furrowed in confusion. "Kate, what am I suppose to do with baby..." He looked up at her in confusion and saw a serene smile spread across her features. His eyes grew wide as the realization set in. "-Shoes?"

"Uh." A smile tugged his lips upward as he watched her. "Katie, are- are you...?" He moved closer, failing to stop a broad smile from forming on his lips.

She only nodded in confirmation, matching his broad smile. He lifted her up in a tight embrace, swinging her around both laughing happily.

"Oh wow! Really? This is... ah - you were right much better than anything else," Rick said with a chuckle, taking her face in between his hands as delirious happiness descended on them. "I... love... you... so... much," he said in between kissing her.

"I love you too," Kate replied smiling.

"You're pregnant. We're pregnant... Woo-hoooo!" He threw his arms up in the air.

"I take it you're excited," Kate commented with a laugh, watching her thrilled husband in amusement.

"Are you kidding me? I'm freaking ecstatic! This is the best Christmas present ever. Thank you." He gave her a soft, lingering kiss before bending down to stand on his knees.

"Hey baby, it's Daddy... I just want to say that I love you already and can't wait to meet you," he whispered to Kate's stomach while she tenderly ran a hand through his hair.

"What about me?" Kate asked in mock indignation.

"Oh and Mommy also says hi."

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so it really got mushy at the end there, but hey, I told you it was fluffy. Cut me some slack, it's almost Christmas. I hope you enjoyed it. (I apologize if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes)**

**Please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: thank you all for your kind reviews and story alerts - I love and appreciate it! I actually had something totally different planned for chapter 5, but then this popped into my head. I've noticed in a lot of stories that Rick is always the one cheering Kate up or making her feel better, so here I thought she would be the one to cheer him up a bit. This is a relatively short chapter, but it's like 3h30 am here in SA, so ya sorry but I don't think I'm gonna make 4000 words again.**

**Enjoy! And review please.**

**Castle - _nie myne nie_ (not mine). See, I'm even admitting it in another language.**

**(Updated version - spotted a glaring and rather embarassing mistake. Sorry James _Patterson_)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 5 – Shall we dance?**

_Words._ Easier said than written. Richard Castle, famed mystery novelist could certainly attest to that. After being informed that his next Nikki Heat novel was due in three months' time, Rick knew he was in trouble. _Big_ trouble. His writer's block, like an old, bad habit, was seemingly back with a vengeance and not shaken easily. '_Damn you James Patterson and your stupid ten novels a year'_ Rick thought bitterly with a sigh, absent-mindedly watching the blinking cursor on the computer screen. Despite being hoarded in his office for the last week, a few ideas scribbled on bits of paper and his scruffy appearance, the Master of the Macabre had nothing. _Zilch. Nada_. He was tired, irritable and frustrated. To further exacerbate the situation, he was also concerned about his nine-week pregnant wife chasing after dangerous criminals.

He did not notice Kate leaning against the doorframe, observing him. She knew that he was under pressure – his behaviour the last few days after the meeting with Gina was proof of that. She also knew that he worried about her – _constantly_. Turning up at the precint to 'bring her lunch' or to 'do research' or to 'provide his expertise'. In reality Kate actually found his protectiveness sweet and endearing, but she was aware that it was affecting his ability to get some work done. She was suppose to be his muse, not distraction.

"Hey," she said softly stepping into the study, startling him from his trance of exhaustion. Rick looked up and gave her a tired smile.

"Hey," he responded wearily. "I thought you were asleep." He glanced down at his watch, noticing that it was usually the time when Kate would be sound asleep. At this, he felt a faint pang of guilt.

"Couldn't sleep," Kate replied, slowly walking towards his desk, her hands casually clasped behind her back. She had started to show a slight bump, but it was barely noticeable. People who didn't know about her pregnancy would probably not suspect that she was expecting.

"So... any progress?" She ventured catiously. Rick rubbed a hand over his face, letting out a laboured breath.

"Nothing. I. Have. Nothing." He fixed his a blank gaze on the laptop in front of him, before looking up at his wife.

"What can I do to help?" Kate perched herself on the edge of the desk, placing her feet on his chair. His mouth flickered up for a moment.

"_Wweeelll_... a kiss would be nice." Rick arched his eyebrows as a teasing smile spread across his features.

"I could do that," Kate replied with smile. She lent forward and gave him a soft, sweet kiss that lasted several seconds. "Feel better?" She asked with a grin; now sitting on his lap with her arms loosely draped around his neck and shoulders.

"A little... but you know what would cheer me up even _more_?" Kate noticed the typical devious Castle glint in his eyes and narrowed hers, deciding to humour him.

"What?"

"A little lap dance followed by a striptease." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively with a sly smirk. Kate only rolled her eyes, trying - unsuccessfully - to keep an amused smile from her lips. Getting up with no reply, she moved over to the cd-player.

"I have something better in mind," she said while finding one of their favourite songs.

"What could be better than what I suggested?" Rick teased, watching his wife curiously.

Ignoring his reply, Kate stepped towards him while Elvis Presley's voice filled the room.

_'Ooohhhh my love, my darling...'_

"Dance with me." She held out her hand towards him. Rick's expression softened as a small smile pulled his lips upward. Kate Castle always found new ways to surprise and intrigue him. _'Another layer of the Beckett onion'_ the thought rushed through his mind as he took her hand standing up.

He drew her closer to him and resting his cheek on top of her head, they swayed slowly and silently to the music.

_'I need your love, I need your love. Godspeed your love to me'_

"I love this song," Kate sighed as they barely moved to the music.

"Mmm-hmmm... Probably because of _Ghost,_" Rick mumbled into her hair. "I bet you cried your pretty little eyes out while watching that sob-fest," he continued with a smirk.

"Yeah well, at least I wasn't the one who sobbed like a 10-year old girl while watching The Lion King now was I?" Kate retorted softly, continuing their casual, playful banter.

"When did I do that?" Rick tried to sound indignant, but his voice was far too relaxed to indicate indignation.

"Last week." Kate smiled against his shoulder, closing her eyes momentarily as she listened to the music. Silence once again descended as they swayed rhythmically to Elvis' rendition of the classic love song.

_'Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea. To the open arms of the sea. Lonely rivers sigh 'wait for me, wait for me' I'll be coming home, wait for me'_

"Oh my love, my darling... I've hungered for your touch." Rick softly started to sing along, whispering the lyrics to his wife. Kate smiled at this and pulled back to look at her husband.

"Feel better _now_?"

"Mmm-hmmm, much better," Rick replied with a relaxed grin. "Thank you Mrs. Castle." He took her face in between his hands and leaned down for a sweet kiss.

"Don't mention it," she replied playfully, smiling at him.

"Well, honey, I think you and lil' Castle here need some sleep," he said, tenderly placing a hand on the slight bump of her stomach.

"You too..." Just as he started to protest, Kate placed a hand over his mouth. "No arguments. You need to get some rest," she said with serious concern. Her expression, however, changed quickly with her mouth converting into a smile.

"Besides I - _we_ - need someone to spoon with."

* * *

**A/N: Well there you are folks, I hope you enjoyed it. I contemplated which song they would dance to and figured that they would go for a classic, hence 'Unchained Melody'. Personally not my favourite, but probably appropriate for a scene like this.**

**Once again review please, it is always nice to get them. And it usually inspires me to write. If you have anything you want to see in this fic, let me know.**

**Thanks for reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thank you all for the kind reviews, they really motivate and inspire me. **

**Here is the next installment. Originally this was supposed to be chapter 5. I wanted to do something that included a bit of a case and everyone at the 12th.**

**Enjoy!**

**Castle is not bla bla bla**

* * *

**Chapter 6 - Bennie & the Jets**

"This guy is a real piece of work. Three counts of assault, one for attempted murder, one for attempted rape and a few DUI's." Esposito informed everyone. Cpt. Montgomery, Esposito, Ryan, Kate and Rick were in the observation room watching the suspect in question through the glass.

_"And _he has ties to a local biker gang with quite a reputation of kidnap and murder,_"_ Ryan continued while everyone kept their eyes on the burly, unkempt and heavily tattooed figure on the other side of the glass.

"Seems to be our guy," Kate commented, her brow furrowing in concentration while she slightly bit her thumb nail.

"How is this guy _not_ in jail?" Rick commented with a disgusted grimace.

"Alright, let's go Castle." She straightened and started to make her way out the door. Rick quickly followed as he usually did. Since her pregnancy, he has once again been a regular at the 12th. Although he has denied on various occasions that he was not there in order to keep a protective eye on his wife, Kate knew that he felt a responsibility towards her safety and therefore tagged along.

"Mr. Jasper, I'm sure you are aware of why you were brought in for questioning," Kate stated as she walked through the door of interrogation room 1.

Carl Jasper, slumped in his chair, suddenly sat up upon seeing Kate. He flashed a predatory smile while slowly running his eyes up and down her body, barely noticing Rick's presence.

"Well, well… I'm not really sure why I'm here, sweetie. But _now…_ I really don't mind," he said with a raspy drawl that made Kate shiver uncomfortably. Leaning forward in his chair, Carl fixated his eyes on her and Rick could only imagine what depravity was going through his mind. At this, his jaw stiffened and he became more rigid in his seat. He was used to suspects treating Kate like this and even though he hated it, Rick could barely restrain himself while a scumbag was mentally undressing his pregnant wife.

"It's detective and you're here for kidnapping, robbery, rape _and_ murder, Mr. Jasper," Kate said unfazed.

"Huh, well how about that? I sure went up the criminal food chain, now didn't I, _Detective,_" Carl said arrogantly sitting back in his seat and folding his arms across his chest.

"Do recognise these people?" Kate placed a picture of the victims, Robert and Shirley McLeod, smiling happily, on the steel table.

"Nope," Carl replied coolly after briefly looking at the picture. "But I sure would like to get to know you better. I bet you are a bobcat in the sack, Detective. _Mmm-hmm,_" he continued in a lowered tone with a sleezy smile. "Your husband is a lucky, _lucky_ man" He had noticed her wedding ring. At this, Rick tensely shifted in his chair, a reaction that did not go unnoticed by Kate.

"Where were you between 21h00 and 00h00 on Sunday evening?" she continued ignoring the lewd comment.

"Ah, here and there. Don't really remember."

"A witness placed you at the same garage where the McLeods stopped at just past 21h00." Kate let it sunk in for a few moments before continuing. "That's quite a coincidence you know, since we found their stolen car in your possesion."

"I have nothing to say to you." Carl's expression turned stony as he watched Kate without blinking.

"What happened, Carl?" Rick spoke for the first time, leaning forward in his chair and clasping his hands together on the table. "You had a little too much to drink. You saw Robert McLeod and his beautiful wife at the garage. And you think 'ah what the hell' a little kidnap, rape and murder should be fun," he continued looking the other man straight in the eye. Carl's jaw stiffened as his eyes darted between Rick and Kate.

"Who's Pretty Boy here?" he directed the question at Kate while nudging his head in Rick's direction. "Like I said, I have nothing to say to you." His voice dived a few threatening decibles.

"We found a lot of DNA evidence, Carl. Hairs, fibres, skin under Shirley McLeod's nails and also semen. I bet my badge that all those belong to you... Are you ready to start talking now?"

Carl remained motionless and silent, just watching her with dull, dark eyes.

"You know what, I can be a patient, but when someone is screwing with me, I get… _irritable._" Kate was starting to lose her patience. "And that's exactly what you're doing right now."

"You don't want to screw with her. _Believe _me," Rick chipped in.

"Oh, but I would like to _screw_ you Detective – multiple times. Just say when and where. It could be fun... I promise to be gentle." Carl spoke after a few contemplative moments, his voice coarse. Rick's eyes widened and his heart thumped in his chest. He was balling his hands in fists, trying to control his emotions. _'1, 2, 3, 4, 5...'_

Kate was quiet for a few moments just coolly watching the notorious criminal. She came across various types of murderers, but Carl Jasper made her skin crawl with revulsion. When she spoke, her voice was calm, steady and icy.

"You don't have to say anything, because we have everything we need... We got you." Carl stiffened at the tone of her voice and set his jaw.

"Remember my face, Carl, because I'm the one who is going to put you away," Kate said, speaking slowly and making sure the words sunk in. "Because of me, you will _rot _in jail."

"Careful Detective, don't make promises you can't keep," he said, his eyes turning black with simmering rage. He shifted in his chair, a clear sign that he was cornered. Kate sensed this and continued.

"Oh, I intend to keep them" Kate leaned closer, meeting his threatening stare. "In fact, I'll make sure you _die_ there."

"Is that so?" Carl responded quietly, his black eyes narrowing slightly. There were a few silent, tense moments where everything seemed to happen in slow motion.

In a blink of an eye, Carl rushed up across the table and harshly grabbed hold of Kate's neck in a fit of blinding rage. "You think you can threaten me, bitch!"

Rick immediately sprang up and leaped over the surface of the steel table and tackled him to the ground. The two men wrestled on the ground for a few seconds with Carl yelling obscenities at Kate and punching Rick in the face.

After a few seconds Esposito and Ryan crashed through the door, going on to restrain and drag the criminal kicking and screaming out the door. It all happened in a matter of thirty seconds. Rick got up panting from the floor and immediately turned his attention to a visibly shaken and wide-eyed Kate.

"Katie, are-" He quickly moved towards where she was now standing against the glass of the observation room. "Are you okay?" he asked with concern, taking her face in between his hands.

"Uh... yeah," she replied, her hand resting on her neck where Carl had grabbed her. He moved her hand away from her neck to see if she was injured.

"You sure?" he dipped his head in order to meet her eyes.

"Mmmm, yes. I'm okay, sweetie. Really." She gave him a tentative smile before Rick drew her into a close embrace for a few moments.

"Ow." Rick touched his right eye with a grimace.

"Ooh, that's going to leave a mark" Kate commented, gently touching the injury.

"Is it going to become black?" She nodded absent-mindedly while studying his face.

"Cool!"

"_Cool? _You have got to be kidding me," Kate said in disbelief.

"What? This is only my second black eye... _ever," _Rick said. "And, well, an injury gained while protecting my wife," he continued in a softened tone.

Her expression softened as a smile spread across her features.

"My hero." Wrapping her arms around his neck she leaned in for a kiss.

"What about your no-public-displays-of-affection rule?" Rick asked pulling back slightly.

"I think I can make an exception."

XXXX

"Well the bastard just got an extra charge for the assault of an officer added to the list. He's gonna sit for a long time," Captain Montgomery said as he approached Kate's desk. She was applying an ice-pack to Rick's eye and he was milking the attention as much as he could, wincing frequently in so-called pain and demanding that she should 'kiss it better'. Unsurprisingly, Kate did not indulge her man-child husband.

"Castle, you okay?" Montgomery asked.

"Yeah, nothing the good doctor here can't fix," Rick replied, glancing up at his wife who just rolled her eyes with a smile.

"And you Beckett?" Everyone continued to call Kate by her maiden last name and Rick by his.

"I'm fine, Sir." Kate reassured her concerned boss.

"Yo, what do guys say to a round of drinks?" Esposito said in greeting as he walked towards them with Ryan following closely behind.

"Sounds good to me," the Captain responded.

"I have a black eye, so I think a deserve a drink," Rick said, before turning to his wife. "Honey?"

"Yeah, sure." Kate nodded with a smile.

"Hey Castle, what about we all go The Old Haunt for drinks?" Ryan said.

"Just what I was about to suggest," Rick replied hopping off from Kate's desk. "We have a lot of celebrating to do," he continued smiling broadly, looking at Kate who returned his broad grin. They still had to tell the boys and the Captain that she was pregnant and this provided the perfect opportunity for them to share the news.

"Am I aslo invited to this little rendezvous?" Lanie asked causing everyone to turn around. Esposito had in fact invited her in person a few minutes earlier when he went down to for a 'visit' - a.k.a make-out session - after taking Carl Jasper to holding.

"Only if you're prepared to play a drinking game with me," Esposito quipped flashing her a sly smile.

"I'm gonna smack you," Lanie retorted, arching one of her eyebrows. "In addition to beating you at that drinking game," she continued with a sultry smile.

"Alright enough talk people, let's get going!" Montgomery ordered.

Draping an arm around Kate's shoulders while walking towards the elevator behind the others, Rick whispered into her ear.

"You know what I like best about your pregnancy?" Kate only shook her head, her brow furrowing slightly. She expected Rick to say something deep and sweet.

"Your breasts. They're getting bigger... and I love it," Rick said with a smirk causing her to blush crimson red. "Rick!" Kate exclaimed quietly while gently slapping his chest.

"Ow! Hey, careful. I'm injured, remember?" he responed in mock seriousness. She only rolled her eyes with a shake of her head.

"You're such a girl, Castle."

XXXX

The small family of friends came through the doors of The Old Haunt - the bar Rick had purchased a few years before - chatting and laughing merrily. The bar-regulars nodded at the group in greeting, aware of who they were while the employees smiled enthusiastically at them.

They went on to their special and private booth, informally dubbed the '12th', which was only reserved for them. They were also the only customers who had the privilege of drinking for free.

"Hey Bobby!" Rick called over to one of the waiters, a young, skinny dark-haired man. The young man directed his attention to Rick and quickly made his way over to the group.

"Mr. Castle, great to see you and Mrs. Castle and your friends here again. It's been a while." The young man greeted with a warm smile.

"Yeah well Bobby, tonight we're celebrating," Rick replied with a cheery smile while placing an arm around Kate who was busy talking to Lanie. "So what are we drinking folks?" Rick turned his attention to the rest of the group.

"Scotch on the rocks." Captain Montgomery always ordered the same.

"Beer," Ryan responded.

"Make that two," Esposito added, holding up two fingers.

"I'm in the mood for a 'Sex on the Beach,'" Lanie said with a smile while covertly squeezing Esposito's thigh.

"KC, what do you want?" Rick asked looking at his wife. Kate usually ordered a glass of red wine or a cocktail, but obviously she couldn't anymore.

"Uh, a virgin strawberry daiquiry," she answered.

"And for me a whiskey on the rocks," Rick quickly said in order for the others not to notice Kate's answer.

A few minutes and plenty of jokes later, their drinks arrived.

"So what are we toasting to?" Ryan asked looking at the group.

"I'll start. Let's toast to... justice," Ryan interrupted himself, lifting his glass with everyone nodding in agreement.

"To... dirtbags rotting in jail," Esposito stated to a chorus of 'hear hears'.

"To the evidence that convict them," Lanie said.

"And the cops who catch them," Rick added and the group toasted again.

"To the writers who follow them around," Montgomery added, causing everyone to laugh.

"To the victims," Kate added quietly after a few moments with a sad smile.

"Hear hear," Rick said while clinking his glass with his wife's. The whole group nodded in agreement and went on to clink glasses with one another.

"I would like to make a special toast," Rick started, glancing over to his wife. "To one of the NYPD's finest, my muse, the love of my life _and_... the mother of my unborn child." He looked at her tenderly while a small smile tugged his lips upward before leaning in for a kiss.

"Hear hear!" Lanie exclaimed in agreement, already aware of her friend's pregnancy.

"Beckett, you're pregnant?" Esposito asked while a surprised smile spread across his features. Kate simply nodded in reply, smiling broadly at the two men she considered to be her brothers.

"I'm gonna be an uncle... We're gonna be uncles, bro," Ryan said excitedly, turning to his partner. "Congratulations guys!"

"Yeah, congratulations. That is great news!" Esposito joined in. "You knew?" After a few moments he turned to Lanie, slightly taken aback by her moderate reaction.

"What do you think? Of course I knew, I'm the godmother," Lanie replied with a smile.

"Does that mean I'm the godfather?" Esposito whispered the question into Lanie's ear with a smirk. "I think you both are," she replied with a smile glancing towards Ryan.

"Congratulations you two... To Rick, Kate and the lucky person they're bringing into this world," the Captain said with a warm smile while lifting his glass in salute while the other three followed suit.

"Thanks guys," Kate replied, her vision blurry due to tears. "And you." She turned her attention to Rick. Placing a hand on his cheek, she leaned up for a soft, tender kiss. "I love you," he whispered while kissing the top of her head.

Somewhere in the background, Billy Joel's _Piano Man_ started to fill the air. Rick's mouth slowly converted into a smile as he recalled the evening they sang the song in the precint before coming to The Old Haunt.

"It's nine o'clock on a Saturday..." He started, while everyone smiled and nodded in remembrance.

"The regular crowd shuffles in." Esposito joined in.

"There's an old man sitting next to me." Ryan sang, nudging the Captain with his shoulder. "Making love to his tonic and gin," Montgomery added.

"He said son can you play me a memory, I'm not really sure how it goes. It's sad and it's sweet, and I knew it complete when I wore a younger man's clothes." The two women belted out.

"Everyone!" Rick exclaimed wrapping an arm around his wife, urging the others to do the same.

"Sing us a song, you're the piano man. Sing us a song tonight. While we're all in the mood for a melody and you got us feeling alright." The little family of friends sang jovially while swaying to the music; toasting to partnerships that lasted a lifetime, moments of no-bounds happiness and new, surprising adventures.

* * *

**A/N: I really loved writing this chapter, probably because it included the other characters as well. I hope you also enjoyed it. **

**Review please and let me know what you think.**

**P.S. the title of the chapter is from Elton John's song, _Bennie and the Jets_. No special meaning, I just thought it sounded cute. :-) **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews, you guys are great. Here's the next installment, I hope you like it. Even if it is a little short. **

**Enjoy!**

**Castle, not mine._ Kapish?_**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 7 – Dexter & Tracy**

"_Dexter? Would you mind doing something for me?"_

"_Anything. What?"_

"_Get the heck out of here"_

"_Oh my dear Red, I couldn't do that. It wouldn't be fair to you. You need me too much."_

"I love this movie," Kate commented with a grin, before eating a handful of popcorn. They were having a classic movie-marathon night upstairs in their bedroom complete with pizza, chocolate and popcorn. Currently they were watching Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant spar in the 1940 classic romantic comedy _The Philadelphia Story_. Rick was in a sitting position, leaning against the headboard of the bed with Kate lying in between his legs and resting her back on his abdomen, her head placed on his chest.

"One of my favourites," Rick replied. He had an arm draped over her while absent-mindedly caressing her swollen stomach. She was sixteen weeks pregnant and by now clearly showing a baby-bump. In a few days' time, they would know whether Junior was a boy or a girl.

"They kinda remind me of us," he commented a few moments later. Kate turned to look at him and raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"How so? Are we like a bickering divorced couple who on the spur-of-the-moment get remarried on the day the woman was supposed to marry another guy?" Kate flashed him a sardonic smile and this time Rick was the one who rolled his eyes. She once again turned her attention to the movie.

"_No_… the sparring. The back-and-forth. The sexual tension… And of course, my obvious resemblance to Cary Grant," he said the last sentence flashing his usual boyish grin.

"Oh _please,_" Kate responded, rolling her eyes with a smile.

"What?"

"You resembling Cary Grant is a little bit of a stretch, don't you think?" Kate replied with a chuckle. "You know who reminds me of him, though?" She continued, her brow furrowing slightly.

"No, who?"

"George Clooney."

"_George Clooney? _Seriously? Oh come on," Rick responded contemptuously.

"Yeah, he's got that whole old-Hollywood charm going on-"

"And I don't?" Rick interrupted.

"And he's really, _really_ good-looking," Kate continued, ignoring his interruption. "_Mmm_-_hmmm_, Gorgeous George," she continued to muse absent-mindedly.

"He's not _that _good-looking… or charming," Rick mumbled a little miffed. "I've met once, you know? I just don't see the attraction," he continued with a scowl. Smirking, Kate sat up and turned around to look at him.

"Oooohh, are we _jealous_ Ricky?" She teased with a mocking grin.

"No." Rick scoffed. "Of course not." She only raised her eyebrows at him, unconvinced by his answer.

"But just to clarify... do you think he's better looking than me?" He quickly added causing Kate to let out a laugh.

"You want me to be honest?"

"Uh, yeah... I think." He winced, fearing for his ego. Kate once again rolled her eyes at him.

"In the world of old-Hollywood, if George is Cary Grant then you are Clark Gable... And well, we all know who the King of Hollywood was." She flashed him a warm smile. "So to answer your question, Mr. Castle, yes you are... To me anyway," she continued with a coy smile while slightly biting her lower lip.

"Good answer Mrs. Castle," he responded as a smile spread across his features. He gave her a kiss before lowering his head to her stomach.

"Hear that junior? Daddy is better-looking than George Clooney." He looked up at Kate again. "You know we are going to have a freakishly beautiful child, right? With my better-looking-than-George-Clooney-genes and your flawless gorgeousness-"

Insert another eye-roll from Kate.

"We have created a beautiful almost-human being," he continued with a smile.

"Yes we have," Kate responded softly after a few moments, smiling. She leaned in for a slow, tender kiss before returning to her position; lying with her back against his stomach and her head against his chest. They slipped into comfortable silence; happy, fulfilled and utterly content.

Instead of watching the movie, Rick studied his wife - every expression that formed on her exceptionally beautiful features, the small wrinkles around her eyes when she laughed and the loose strands of hair that caressed her face. He took in every detail, wanting to engrave them onto the slates of his mind. He had never loved or admired anyone as much as Kate. She was an original. Extraordinary. A creature of the light in a world of darkness and chaos. A fascinating combination of contradictions - beauty and pain, strength and vulnerability. And she was all his. Every complex, mystical and beautiful layer his domain to explore.

Rick let his mind drift back over the years to the very beginning of their story. His mouth curved upwards as he thought about that first case and her cheekiness when he had tried to charm his way into her pants. She had him at 'you have no idea' and her sexy saunter. He had never been so turned on by rejection. From there on in, Richard Castle was hooked, captivated and enchanted by this enigma of a woman.

"She was beautiful, wasn't she?" Kate commented quietly while watching a young Katharine Hepburn in action.

"Mmm-hmm," Rick responded absent-mindedly, not taking his eyes off her. She felt his gaze examing her and tried to suppress a smile.

"Castle."

"Mmm?"

"You're staring."

"I'm admiring." He quietly corrected her before pressing a kiss against her temple. "And there's nothing wrong with admiring something beautiful." His voice dived a few decibles as he moved down, placing soft kisses behind her ear and trailing them down to her neck. Kate's eyes involuntarily closed as goosebumps spread over her skin.

"Well, your _admiration_ got me pregnant." She sat up and turned around to face him. Rick wrapped his arms around her growing waist and drew her to him.

"My _frequent_ admiration." He smirked before growing thoughtful. "God, you are stunning," he whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. Taking hold of her neck, he pulled her in for a slow, toe-curling and completely absorbing kiss. Kate breathlessly broke away, her heart racing and head spinning. Even after three years of marriage, Rick still had the ability to make her forget her own name with only a kiss.

"Oh... You're in one of _those_ moods," Kate said quietly with a smirk, her eyes darting down his body."Guess movie night is over," she continued, her eyes dancing playfully.

Rick's mouth pulled up into a teasing grin.

"It's only started."

* * *

**A/N: Okay, initally this chapter was supposed to be longer and was suppose to include Alexis and a trip to the gynecologist. But it totally took on a course of its own and reading it again, I just felt it was the right place to end it. The next chapter, though, will include a trip to the gyne and the revelation of the baby's sex and of course ensuing fluffiness. If you have any suggestions/ideas on that, let me know. **

**P.S. The title of the chapter is the names of the main characters of _The Philidelphia Story_. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favour and watch it; classic Hollywood.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews! You guys are the best. **

**This chapter, as promised, is a reveal of the baby's gender and of course this leads to a lot of fluffiness... which we all like, naturally :-)**

**Enjoy!**

**Castle belongs to ABC**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 8 - You + Me = Us Three**

Two big brown eyes were following her shyly, curiously studying the beautiful lady in front of them. They observed how she gently caressed her swollen stomach and how her lips flickered upward occasionally. Even though the waiting area was full of pregnant women, the two eyes seemed glued on _her_.

The adorable chocolate-haired little girl was looking at Kate every few seconds, darting her head past her mother to watch the detective keenly. Kate, reading a magazine, noticed the little girl's gaze on her and smiled to herself. Each time she would turn to look at her little admirer, the girl would nip back behind her mother. It happened a few times and had now become an unspoken game; Kate's magazine forgotten on her lap. After a while, the little cutie got up from her seat and moved to the seat next to her mother, sitting in between her mother and Kate.

"What's your name?" The small voice asked, causing her (pregnant) mother to look up from her magazine.

"Lindy, sweetie, don't bother the nice lady," the woman said softly with an apologetic smile, her eyes meeting Kate.

"No, it's fine…" Kate smiled reassuringly at the other woman before turning her attention to Lindy. "My name is Kate, Lindy." She smiled down at the little person watching her intently while her small legs were swinging off the seat. Kate judged the little girl to be about three.

"Nice to meet you." She reached out her hand to the child who extended her miniature one.

"This is my mom," Lindy said, glancing up at her mother.

"Hi, I'm Kate."

"Hey, Laura. Nice to meet you." The two women shook hands, smiling.

"You have a beautiful daughter, Laura," Kate said, looking at Lindy again.

"Thanks. Yeah, beautiful, but also a bit of a handful," the other woman answered with a laugh while leisurely running a hand through her daughter's hair.

"What about you? You have any other kids?" Laura asked, briefly looking at Kate's baby bump.

"Uh, no. This is our first one… Well, I have a stepdaughter in college, but this is _my_ first one." She tenderly ran a hand over her stomach.

"You?"

"Just Lindy and her baby brother," Laura answered with a smile while pointing to her baby bump.

"Are you also going to have a baby brother?" Lindy piped up. Kate let out a laugh at the little cutie's childlike innocence.

"Well I don't know whether it's a boy or a girl, Lindy." She looked up at Laura again. "We're finding out today…. That is if my husband gets here," Kate continued with a smile and a shake of her head.

"How far along are you?" Laura asked.

"Sixteen weeks... You?"

"Six months. I'm just here for a check-up. But so far, so good" Laura answered with a smile. Just then the receptionist stepped out into the waiting area.

"Mrs. Roberts?" An older, grey-haired woman called. "The doctor is ready for you now," the woman continued with a friendly smile once she had Laura's attention.

"Well, it was nice meeting you Kate."

"Likewise." Kate looked down at the little girl with a smile. "You too Lindy."

"Bye," the little girl greeted, taking her mother's hand as they walked away.

Kate smiled at the scene, her mind drifting to future visions of her with a mini-version of herself running around in the park, playing hide-and-seek with Rick and reading bed-time stories to her daughter. Her mind also unwittingly flooded with memories of her own mother, causing Kate to feel a pang of longing and remembrance. _'I wish you were here Mom'_ she thought sadly, running a finger over her mother's ring that hung around her neck. She was shaken from her reverie when she noticed the familiar form of her husband out of the corner of her eye.

"Hey sweetie." Rick made his way towards her, quickly placing a peck on her lips as he sat down.

"Hey… That took longer than usual," Kate greeted, linking one arm with his and weaving her hand in his.

"Ugh, Paula. You know she is," Rick replied letting out a breath with a shake of his head. "She can be a real pain in the ass sometimes."

They sat in silence for a few seconds before Rick turned towards Kate's stomach.

"Hey Junior... How are you doing today, honey?" He spoke to Kate's baby bump whenever he had the chance, talking about a range of topics - history, worthless facts that only he would know about, literature, his antics at the precinct, Alexis, cartoons, video games, etc. Occassionally Rick also whispered secrets to his unborn child on how to twist his/her mother's arm. Obviously Kate found this sweet, endearing and absolutely adorable. Her husband could be so darn cute sometimes.

"Today we're finding out whether you are a boy or a girl." He continued to speak softly to her swollen stomach. "Mommy and I are really, _really_ excited about that, Sweet Pea." He looked up at his wife with a broad, happy grin. Kate returned a tender smile while gently stroking his cheek.

"Yes we are," she answered quietly. Just then the grey-haired receptionist stepped into the waiting area.

"Mrs. Castle? The doctor is ready for you."

XXXX

"Castle! Put. The. Fetus. D_own,_" Kate demanded with a clenched jaw, using her authoritative voice as if she was scolding a naughty child. They were in the doctor's examination room waiting for Dr. Jones, Kate's gynecologist. Obviously, being the 9-year-old-on-a-sugar-rush that he is, Rick couldn't sit still for five minutes and proceeded to examine the contents on the counter which included models of fetuses at different stages of development.

"I'm just looking," he mumbled, frowning with concentration; his attention focused on the model in his hands. "It's pretty cool... This how our kid is going to look at six months." He turned to look at her with an excited grin, the model fetus in his hands. Kate only rolled her eyes and smiled. After another minute or two the door swung open with Dr. Jones, an attractive, 40-something woman walking in.

"Good morning," she greeted jovially, her stride and manner confident. She was recognised as the best gynecologist on the East Coast and obviously being Mrs. Richard Castle, Kate only received the best. Rick, upon finding out about her pregnancy, immediately did research on who the best gynecologist was in New York and found it to be Dr. Anna Jones.

"So how are the three Castles doing today?" She asked with a smile glancing at Rick and Kate before flipping through the file of Kate's recent medical history.

"Good, a little tired, but good, Doc," Kate answered with a smile, taking Rick's hand in hers. She liked Dr. Jones' direct and reassuring manner and trusted her.

"And you Rick?" Dr. Jones' looked up from the file and smiled at Rick.

"Uhmm, great," he replied with warm smile. "Really happy and excited" After a few moments his expression changed as a trademark Castle grin slowly engulfed his features.

"Dr. Jones, is it true that some women's *a-hem*_ sex... drive_ increases with a pregnancy?" Kate's head snapped in Rick's direction and her eyes grew wide as she glared at him while he fought to keep a smile off his face. He was purposefully trying to tease and embarass her a little.

"Rick!" Kate hissed, feeling heat slowly starting to rise to her cheeks. She had indeed found herself to be in 'the mood' a little more often than usual since the start of her pregnancy. Her husband, however, was definitely not complaining.

"What? I'm only asking," he replied with a shrug feigning innocence; his eyes glistening mischievously. Dr. Jones struggled to keep an amused smile from tugging her lips upward. She suppressed the grin before answering.

"_Yes_... that is true," she answered with a nod and an amused smile. "Some women seem to have an increased sex drive while others experience a decrease in libido... If you experience the former, be grateful and, well, enjoy it," Dr. Jones continued with a casual shrug and a smile. Kate, by now, was blushing crimson red while Rick was grinning madly.

"See, a perfectly innocent and reasonable question." He looked at Kate with a cheeky and triumphant smile while she only stared at him. But despite how she annoyed she got with him, Kate couldn't stay angry at her husband for long.

"Well, Kate, everything seems to be normal," Dr. Jones continued, slightly lifting the file in her hands. "You are perfectly healthy..." She stopped for a few moments, before speaking again; her expression more serious. "My only concern is, and we have discussed this, is the amount of rest you get... Now I know you have a job that requires long hours, but you have to try and take a little slower, Kate... You're not Superwoman," she continued, giving Kate a stern look.

"You hear that, I'm not paranoid or over the top," Rick added, mimicking Dr. Jones' stern expression. Kate glanced down at her hands and only nodded.

"I know, I know." She sighed before looking up at Dr. Jones. "I'll try to take it slower." She glanced towards Rick who still wore a serious expression.

"You promise?" he asked, arching his eyebrows.

"Yeah, ok, I promise," she conceded. He relented and smiled at her, taking her hand in his and squeezing it.

"Okay, well, are we ready to find out whether this one is a Jack or a Jill?" Dr. Jones asked after a few moments, taking a seat next to Kate.

"Oh yeah!" Rick smiled excitedly, leaning forward in his seat. He didn't care whether they had a boy or a girl, he was going to become a dad for the second time. And this time around he was going to experience it with the love of his life.

"Yes, we are," Kate replied, a broad smile spreading over her face. She knew that Rick didn't mind whether they had a boy or a girl and for the most part she didn't either. But, deep down, Kate Castle hoped that they would have a daughter - she wanted to have the relationship with her daughter she never had the opportunity to experience with her own mother.

"Alright." Dr. Jones nodded before applying the cool jel to Kate's stomach. Rick and Kate marvelled for the umpteenth time at the quick heartbeat that sounded out.

"That is _so_ awesome." He leaned in closer in order to get a better view, his expression one of awe. Kate, keeping her eyes on the monitor, only squeezed his hand.

"Good strong heartbeat," Dr. Jones' commented absent-mindedly. "Let's hope your baby gives us a good look," she said smiling at them. She continued to move the instrument over Kate's stomach, her face a study in concentration.

After a few moments, a satisfied smile tugged her lips upward as she turned to look at Kate and Rick who watched her eagerly.

"Mr. and Mrs. Castle... say hello to your little girl."

"Wow, oh, that's wow," Rick said with a large smile, struggling to express himself.

"Congratulations," Dr. Jones said with a smile.

"Really?" Kate responded as a wide, all-consuming smile enveloped her features. "We're having a girl?" She continued as tears started to well up. Dr. Jones only nodded in confirmation, before getting up and excusing herself; giving Rick and Kate some privacy.

"Rick, we're having a girl." She turned to him, smiling through happy tears. He was grinning from ear to ear and leaned in to give her a kiss. "You're happy?" Kate asked, looking at him.

"Yes! _Yes_! Are you kidding me? I could do with another beautiful woman in my life... Especially if she's gonna look like you." He kissed the top of her head before drawing her into a tight hug. Kate smiled as joyful tears slowly ran down her cheeks, feeling more happiness than she ever did before in her life. She didn't need anything more than this. Than her family.

Rick broke from the embrace and moved his head towards her stomach.

"Hey there Princess," he whispered, gently stroking the baby bump, his eyes becoming moist with tears.

"Looks like she already has her daddy wrapped around her little finger," Kate commented with a laugh. Rick looked up at her with a soft smile, gently stroking her cheek.

"Just like her mom."

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I wanted to add something more to this, but decided to rather do that in a later chapter. The second part got a bit long, but because it was the reveal of the baby's gender, I decided to write it in detail and not rush the section. I hope it's fluffy enough, though.**

**Review please!**

**Thank you for reading ;-)**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews! It really does inspire me. I enjoy writing this series! Hence the quick update.**

**Okay so this chapter is a little less fluffy, but don't worry there is fluff to be had... I wanted to write something where they experience some conflict; no one is perfect or happy _all the time. _Result - this chapter.**

**Enjoy!**

**Castle is some really talented guy's property. Not mine.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 9 – Guardian**

"Kate!" Rick's voice boomed through the empty bullpen as he stomped towards where she was sitting at her desk. She stiffened at the sound and winced inwardly. _'Oh crap'_ she thought in apprehension as she looked up from her desk, seeing his angry disposition.

It was 22h40 and Kate was finishing up paperwork while Rick had been in a meeting with Paula and Gina. Even though she intended to be home much earlier, she had lost track of time. And now she was in trouble. _Big_ trouble.

"_Heeyyy_ sweetie," she started with a smile, in an attempt to coax him; their roles, for the time being, reversed.

"What are you still doing here?" Rick ignored her greeting, his face contorting in fury and his eyes flashing with rage.

"Uhmmm, just paperwork." She shrugged apologetically.

"Dammit Kate! We had an agreement!" he seethed, gesturing angrily with his hands.

"I'm sor-" she started to apologize.

"You were supposed to be at home by now! In bed! Asleep!"

"Rick, I'm sorry." She got up, her shoulders slumped a little while his large frame towered over her small one. Richard Castle could be physically intimidating and a little terrifying if he was in the right, or rather, wrong mood.

He turned and looked away from her, pursing his lips together and frowning; his hands placed on his hips. She had never seen him this angry with her before. A few moments of silence passed before Kate dared to speak again.

"I- I thought that while you were meeting with Gina and Paula that I'd stay a little later to finish up some paperwork." Her voice was soft; her eyes darting downward as she edged closer to him. He turned to look at her, his expression still serious, but the fury in his eyes cooling down upon hearing her soft, almost vulnerable voice.

"I lost track of time… I- I'm sorry, honey." She looked up at him, gently resting her hands on his chest. This caused his anger to almost dissolve completely. He took in a breath before speaking again.

"Have you eaten something?" Kate looked up at him a little alarmed, knowing that her answer might enrage him again.

"Uhh," she started with a nervous laugh. "I- I had something… this afternoon." His face grew taut again as his jaw clenched while his lips pursed together once more.

"Katherine Castle… I- you," he spurted out, shaking his head and pointing an angry finger at her; his eyes regaining their furious blaze.

"I'm sorry! _Please_ don't look at me like that. Please honey," she begged whiningly, giving him her best little-girl-lost look. Rick felt his heart melt and anger turn into mild agitation. He sighed heavily before speaking again.

"Who am I kiddin'? I can't stay mad at you." He gave Kate a tentative smile before drawing her into a hug.

"C'mon, let's get you something to eat… But just so we're clear, you're not off the hook yet," Rick said, breaking from the embrace and holding her slightly away from him.

"Okay, okay," Kate said, breaking from his hold and picking up her jacket and bag. "It won't happen again," she promised as they walked toward the elevator.

"Yeah, well it better not," Rick mumbled, draping an arm around her shoulders. _'I'll make sure it doesn't,' _he thought as the elevator doors closed.

XXXX

18h00. Kate Castle was home by 18h00 on a work day. Correction, she was _ordered_ to go home by Cpt. Montgomery. And she was livid. Enraged. Furious.

_'Rick had NO right!' _she thought angrily while forcefully plucking out pots and pans to make dinner. Rick was not home yet; he had another meeting with Gina that afternoon to discuss the launch of his latest Nikki Heat novel. His absence only caused her anger to simmer and boil, while she took it out out on unsuspecting onions and innocent tomatoes.

18h20. Rick walked in to discover, much to his delight, that his lovely wife was home for once before 21h00. Taking off his jacket, he walked into the kitchen where she was busy.

"Hey honey," Rick greeted with a broad smile.

_Chop! chop! chop!_

"Hey," Kate replied stiffly, keeping her eyes on the counter while continuing to brutalise the vegetables in front of her. Rick moved around the counter to stand behind her, nuzzling her neck. He did not notice how she tensed at the touch.

"You're home early," he said, giving Kate a light kiss in her neck. She only nodded in reply. "Let me help you with that." Rick attempted to take a knife and help her chop the vegetables.

"I'm pregnant, Rick. Not an invalid," Kate snapped quietly, struggling to keep her emotions in check. "I can do it myself," she continued, slightly pushing him out of the way to reach a bowl.

"O-kay." His brow furrowed slightly at her reaction. _'Probably just hormones'. _He opted to rather move to the other side to sit on one of the stools.

"So... how was your day?" He attempted again, seeing that she was not in the best of moods.

"Fine." Came the cool reply as Kate kept her eyes fixed in front of her. There were a few moments of deafening silence.

"Uhmm, you know, usually when someone asks how your day was, you ask them how _their_ day was." Rick shifted in his chair, starting to feel a little irritated.

"Alright." Kate abruptly stopped with what she was doing and looked up at him, placing her hands flat on the counter and leaning forward. "Honey, how was your day?" She asked spitefully, giving Rick a challenging look.

He watched her siliently for a few seconds, sensing that the battle lines were being drawn. He, however, did not know _why _they were being drawn.

"Did I miss something here, Kate?"

"Do you know _why _I'm home earlier than usual?" She ignored his question while she snapped spaghetti into the pot with boiling hot water on the stove. Without giving him a chance to respond, she answered. "Montgomery sent me home." She moved to stand at the counter again. "Rick, he _ordered _me to come home." She looked up at him again, narrowing her eyes slightly and clenching her jaw. Kate Castle was a woman who could get quite angry, given the right circumstances. Add pregnancy hormones and you got yourself one scary lady... with a gun.

_"Oh,"_ Rick thought with a sigh. _"This isn't good'. _He shifted again on the stool and squared his shoulders.

"Well, you have been working hard, honey. I don't think it's such a bad thing. Do you?" He said casually before popping a grape from the fruit bowl into his mouth. He held her gaze, sending a message that he was not about to back down.

"Did you talk to him?" Kate cut to the chase, looking him straight in the eye; her green eyes flashing. Rick sat back in his chair and folded his arms, still holding her gaze.

"Yes, I did," he replied unapologetically. Her face tightened and her eyes grew wide, her pupils dilating.

"You had no right!" she hissed harshly.

"I had every right!" Rick snapped angrily, simultaneously getting off the stool.

"You talked to my boss behind my back!"

"Yes I did and I'm not apologizing for that!"

"You. Had. NO. Right!" Kate basically yelled, her face flushed and her features animated. The tension had now grown into a full-blown fight; dinner forgotten.

"What the hell was I suppose to do? You are working twelve to fifteen hour days. You are constantly tired! Exhausted!" Rick hit back, his blue eyes pools of fury. "You don't listen to me... So, yes, I talked to Montgomery."

"I can take care of myself! I don't _need _you to wrap me up in cotton, Rick!"

"You are now more vulnerable than ever!"

"I'm coping!"

"You are five months pregnant for God's sake!" He screamed, blind with anger.

"I'm pregnant, _not_ sick!" Kate shouted back, matching his rage. There were a few moments of silence. "I wish that everyone would just stop treating me like some fragile porcelain doll," Kate said in a softened tone, her eyes focused on the kitchen counter.

"And _I_ wish that you would realise that you're not Superwoman" Rick retorted. "You can't catch every murderer in New York, Kate" he continued with Kate shaking her head and folding her arms across her chest.

"I'm just trying to do my _job,_" she replied, frustration audible in her tone.

"Yeah, I know," Rick said while taking up his jacket. "And I'm just trying to protect the mother of my child," he continued before walking towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Kate called angrily, moving out of the kitchen.

"I'm going for a walk," Rick retorted sharply, matching her agitation. "To cool down and give you and your hormones a chance to do the same." He flung the door open and walked out, hearing it shut cruelly as he made his way down the corridor.

XXXX

Rick brushed past strangers in a busy street, hands tucked deeply into his pockets as the cool wind swirled around him and nipped at his body. He was deep in thought, still processing the events of the evening. Somewhere between buying a cheap (and horrid) cup of coffee and finding a bench in the park, Rick allowed his mind to drift to an unhappy memory. To the memory in which he realised that he loved her.

_The only sound in the room was the rhythmic beep of the heart monitor, telling him that she was still alive. Still there. Still fighting. He held onto her hand for his own sanity, not taking his eyes off her. In some irrational way, Rick Castle believed that Kate Beckett would somehow open her eyes if he kept his fixed on her. Even with two bullets to the abdomen, excruciating life-saving surgery and pipes flowing out of her throat, Kate was still breathtakingly beautiful. To him anyway. He, on the other hand, looked terrible - dishevelled, unshaven, pale, red-eyed and exhausted. But he couldn't drag himself away; he couldn't reliquish the hope that she would open her green eyes and look at him._

_"Hey Rick..." Cpt. Montgomery greeted softly stepping into the room. "I brought some coffee." His face contorted again upon seeing his finest detective - and surrogate daughter - lying passively on the hospital bed._

_"Thanks," Rick mumbled absent-mindedly, still keeping his eyes on Kate. Still hoping. __Montgomery cringed inwardly as he watched Rick and the haunted expression he wore. The day had started out pretty normally - a body, a murder, a few leads. It ended with Kate Beckett fighting for her life._

_"How's she doing?" Montgomery asked, taking a seat on the opposite end from where Rick was sitting._

_"The same. She's..." Rick trailed off. Eyes religiously focused on her. Still hoping. But by now also praying. Hope wasn't enough anymore. _

_There were a few moments of silence._

_"It wasn't your fault, Castle," Roy said quietly. Rick's eyes briefly flickered in the other man's direction. He didn't respond._

_"Did you hear me?" Montgomery leaned forward in his seat. "It wasn't your fault," he continued more forcefully, slowly rolling the words from his tongue._

_"It is," Rick snapped, looking up at the other man. "Because of me, she's lying here... Because of me, she's fighting for her life," he continued gritting his teeth. Eyes on her again. Praying. Pleading. Hoping._

_"You didn't pull the trigger," Montgomery responded softly. "What she did was brave."_

_"What she did was stupid," Rick interrupted sharply, still looking at a motionless and eerily serene Kate Beckett._

_"She saved your life." Rick stiffened at this before slowly turning his head in the Captain's direction._

_"Yeah..." He mused sadly, nodding his head. "But I'm the one who should be lying here. Not her." He glanced down at her again, still hoping. "She's too good for this," he whispered, tears starting to blur his vision. He gently brushed strands of unruly hair away from her forehead. _

_"Yeah- yes she is," Montgomery conceded after a few moments, his voice a little shaky with emotion. Consequently, he got up from his seat and made his way towards the door. Before exiting, he turned to Rick._

_"I'll be back in a minute...Take care of her, Castle."_

_"I will." _

_Blue eyes still glued on her. Praying. Pleading. And always hoping. Not just that she would wake up, but that she would be able to hear what he was about to confess._

_"I love you."_

XXXX

The door clicked shut softly as Rick stepped into darkness. It was past 20h00 when he got back from his walk, carrying two cups of ice creams.

"Kate!" he called out, making sure that she wasn't downstairs before ascending the stairs.

Light streamed out from underneath their bedroom door and relief flooded him. He gently nudged the slightly ajar door open to reveal a sniffling and red-eyed Kate, her knees pulled up tightly against her pregnant stomach. Rick noticed the large teddy bear he had bought for the baby lying next to her as well as a multitude of used tissues. His heart recoiled at the scene - he _hated_ it when she cried. Even more so when she cried because of him.

They silently observed each other for a few moments before Rick walked towards the bed.

"Hey."

"Hey." The quiet, remorseful greetings came.

"I brought ice cream," he said gently, lifting the evidence with a small smile. Kate only returned a weak smile. He placed it on the bed stand near to him before sitting down next to Kate, facing her. They sat in silence for a few seconds before he spoke.

"Do you know when I realised that I loved you? _Really_, _really_ loved you?" His voice was soft and gentle; his eyes fixed on where his hand was caressing hers. Without giving her a chance to respond, he continued. "The day you were lying in that hospital bed after the McKenzie case, fighting for your life." He glanced up at her, catching her gaze. "I knew that I loved you because... I wanted to lie there in your place. I wanted it to be _me_ with the pain, not you. _Me_ with the scars, not you," he continued, his brow furrowing as his eyes became slightly moist. Kate listened in silence, tears threatening to spill over the threshold of her eyes.

"I'm sorry about going behind your back-"

"Rick, I-" Kate interrupted him, looking at him with desperate, wet eyes. He held up his hand to stop her.

"Let me finish," he said gently. "I'm sorry for what I did. I handled it the wrong way." He kept quiet for a few moments, gathering his thoughts before continuing softly. "I know you can look after yourself... That's one of the things that attracted me to you the most. You are a strong, stubborn woman." He gave her a tender smile, before scooting a little closer to her.

"But, Katie, you're not Superwoman." He looked at her, lifting her chin in order to meet her eyes. "Let me take care of you once in a while... I'm your husband, I want to feel that I'm at least protecting you a little bit." He smiled at her. "Even if it only means that I make sure you get enough sleep and eat regurarly." Kate smiled at this through the tears. "Okay?" He dipped his head slightly, locking his eyes with hers. She only nodded meekly in reply.

"I'm sorry." Her soft reply came as tears streamed down her cheeks. "I love you."

"Me too, sweetie" Rick pulled her into a tight embrace, planting kisses on her temple.

"These pregnancy hormones are really kicking your ass," he said with a laugh as she pulled away from him, tears still dripping over her face.

"I know," she said, unable to contain her bawling. "I don't know what to do." Rick couldn't contain an amused smile from spreading cross his face as he watched his wife sob through a fit of hiccups. He gently rubbed a thumb over her tear-stained cheek before leaning down for a gentle kiss.

"Here, eat your ice cream," he said, handing Kate the cup with her favourite ice-cream: rocky road. "It'll make you feel better."

He went on to sit against the headboard with Kate cuddling up against him, her head resting in the nook of his arm while they ate their ice creams in silence.

"Thank you, honey," she said after a few minutes of quietness, tilting her head upwards to look at him. "Thank you for taking care of me." He smiled at that before leaning down for a deep kiss.

Rick wrapped his arms around her protectively, drawing her body closer to his.

"Thank you for letting me."

* * *

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed it. I liked writing this chapter, as with everyone I write. If you have anything you want to see in this series, let me know.**

**Review please!**

**Thanks for reading :-)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews! You guys are fantastic. Right, so here is the chapter where they choose the name as you probably gathered from the title. It's got some good Rick and Kate banter, sweet Rick and Kate moments and some sadish (don't think this is a word), family moments. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer - see the other chapters.**

**Merry Christmas! **

* * *

**Chapter 10 – What's in a name?**

"What about… Peaches?" Kate let out a breath and shook her head, not taking her eyes off the file in front of her. They were still at the precinct after closing a case with Kate doing the dreaded paperwork and Rick, as usual, annoying her. Currently, they were – or rather he was – discussing names for the baby.

"Oh! Oh! I know." Rick's eyes lit up with excitement. "How about naming her after a flower?" She turned to look at him skeptically, quirking one of her eyebrows up.

"A flower?" Kate looked unimpressed by his suggestion. She pushed her chair away from her desk and got up, revealing her six-month baby bump. He followed her as she walked to the break room.

"Yeah… Hear me out," he said, slightly holding up a hand. He leaned against the doorframe while she was busy making a cup of tea.

"I'm listening, Castle," Kate said, deciding to humour him.

"What about Rose?" She frowned and shook her head in disapproval.

"Rose Castle?" She turned to look at him, her expression doubtful. "I don't like it."

"Okay, fair enough… It doesn't sound right," Rick replied, his expression growing thoughtful. His brow furrowed for a moment in concentration. Kate couldn't help but smile at this. _'So adorable,' _she thought watching her husband who was deep in thought.

"How about… Lily?" Rick suggested, raising his shoulders and gesturing with his hands. Kate contemplated this as her lips pulled downward.

"Lily Castle." She mused thoughtfully, taking her cup and walking out the door. "It's… _okay_. I guess."

Rick let out an audible sigh and rolled his eyes before plopping into his chair.

"What?" Kate asked with a smile before taking a sip of her tea.

"You are impossible to please," Rick said before leaning forward in his seat. "Okay, how about Daisy? Daisy Castle has a nice ring to it." His expression was hopeful. Kate gave him a _'you-have-got-be-joking'-_look.

"I'm not naming my daughter after a cow," she deadpanned. He threw his arms up in the air before rocking back into his chair.

"I give up," he mumbled. Kate only rolled her eyes with a chuckle before bringing her attention back to the computer monitor. They grew quiet for a few minutes with Kate focusing on the paperwork – her brow crinkled in concentration – and Rick playing with paper clips. After fifteen minutes of sitting in silence and getting tired of the paper clips, Rick started to throw little pieces of paper at Kate. Obviously, this was done to irritate her while simultaneously relieving him of his boredom.

"Castle, stop it!" She said sternly, not looking at him.

"Do you know how cute you are when you frown like that?" Rick said with a cheeky smile while continuing to throw little pieces of paper in her direction. Kate turned to glare at him, slightly narrowing her eyes.

"_Ooohh_… " Rick heckled her. "You know you don't scare me with that anymore, right?" Rick said with a grin, playfully throwing another piece of paper at her. He leaned forward in his chair and narrowed his eyes.

"What are you going to do, Detective?" He gave her an audacious smile. Kate leaned forward, meeting his challenging gaze. Before Rick knew what hit him, Kate grabbed him by the ear.

"Ow! _Ow_!" He withered in pain. "Kate, ow!"

"You were saying?" Kate arched her eyebrows.

"Applesapplesapples!" He cried, wincing. She let go of his ear.

"Thought so," she said with a smug smile while Rick rubbed his injured ear.

"You're mean," he whined, still rubbing his ear unhappily.

"Never mess with a pregnant woman, Castle," Kate said getting up and putting on her jacket.

"I bet our daughter is going to have a death grip like her mother," he said, getting up and still rubbing his ear. "Not that I mind. It could come in handy with teenage boys." Kate only rolled her eyes as an amused smile tugged her lips upward while she grabbed her bag.

"C'mon Mr. Castle, let's go home. I'm done here." They walked hand-in-hand toward the elevator, greeting a few colleagues on the way.

"You _will_ teach our daughter your mad jedi ear-grabbing skills, right? For the whole teenage boy phase," Rick said in earnest as the doors closed.

"Yes, I will," Kate replied with a nod. A sly smile slowly formed as she placed a hand on her baby bump.

"You can practice on Daddy if he doesn't listen to Mommy, Sweet Pea."

XXXX

_An hour and a half later…_

"This is nice," Kate breathed, dipping her hand in and out of the lukewarm water.

"Mmm-hmmm," Rick replied lazily, running his fingers up and down her slick upper arms and across her wet shoulders. They were taking a bubble bath together - Rick's suggestion, of course - complete with candles, soft music... and a yellow rubber ducky, which belonged to Rick (of course). He was in a sitting position against the tub while Kate was lying in between his legs; both perilously close to falling asleep.

"Ooh! Ooh! She's kicking!" Kate said excitedly, slightly jerking up and touching her stomach. "Feel here." She quickly placed Rick's hand on the place where the baby was kicking. Rick smiled in awe as he felt the faint bump of kicks against his hand.

"Wow... Hey honey," he said with a broad smile, leaning down over Kate's shoulder. "Hey baby girl," he continued, slightly shifting his hand on Kate's stomach.

Kate turned her head somewhat to face him.

"I was thinking... in terms of baby names." He looked at her with interest, his hand still on her stomach feeling his daughter's fierce kicking. "Uhmm...," Kate started, biting her lower lip. "What about Elizabeth?" She said, her eyes meeting Rick's.

"Mmmm." He again leaned back against the tub, pulling her with him. "Elizabeth Castle... Lizzy Castle," he mused thoughtfully, his lips briefly pulling downward. Kate, who was lying with her head against his chest, looked up at him. After a few moments of contemplating, a smile slowly spread across his face.

"I like it." He looked down at her with a smile. "I really like it."

"Good. Me too," she replied with a broad smile before he leaned down to give her a kiss.

"Finally! A name we agree on." He placed his hand on her stomach again. "Hey Lizzy... Give Daddy a kick." A few moments later, Elizabeth Castle responded to the request.

XXXX

"You're sure you don't want me to go with you?" Rick asked with a concerned expression, his hands tucked deeply into his pants' pockets. He watched her closely as she sat at the dresser; her disposition decidedly more subdued and also sad.

"No... I'm going to meet my dad there," Kate replied softly while putting on the final touches of her make-up.

"Okay," he said before hestitantly retreating out of the room.

It was her mother's birthday today. Every year Kate and her father would go to her mother's grave to wish her a happy birthday. Remembering Johanna Beckett went from being a necessary coping mechanism to an unspoken and sacred rite for Kate and her father. Even though it was hard to face the bleak reality each year, Kate knew that today, _this year_, was going to be particularly difficult.

Looking at her pregnant reflection in the mirror, she was suddenly very aware of her own impending motherhood and felt the emotion manifesting in her eyes. She gently ran a finger over her mother's ring around her neck as her vision became increasingly blurry.

_'I really wish you were here, Mom.'_

XXXX

Kate easily spotted the familiar form of Jim Beckett, already standing in front of his wife's grave and silently paying tribute to her. As she walked past the multitudes of graves, she noticed how the green grass clashed with the grey, bleak head stones. Life in contrast to death. She was also painfully aware of the fact that she was a bearer of life and, in a bizarre way, desecrating the resting place of the dead.

"Hey Dad," Kate greeted upon reaching her father. Jim looked up and smiled sadly at his daughter.

"Hey Katie." He drew her into a tight hug; a hug two mourners shared. She broke from the embrace and stepped towards her mother's grave while her father stepped back, affording her a little privacy.

She bent down to place the white roses - her mother's favourite - on the grave. She went on to gently run her fingers over the head stone, tracing the words engraved on it while placing specific focus on 'Johanna Beckett'. She stood up and silently blinked away sad tears for a few moments.

"Hey Mom," she greeted quietly, tears threatening to spill over the threshold of her eyes. She wiped her eyes before continuing. "Uhmmm... I'm doing well. I'm happy." Kate looked down, focusing on her hands. "Well, we're really happy - Rick and I." She stayed quiet for a few moments. "I wish that you could have known him, Mom... You would have really loved him." A smile tugged her lips upward as tears slowly rolled down her cheeks. She grew quiet for a few seconds before continuing.

"Uhh... I don't know if Dad told you." She briefly glanced at her father. "But I'm six months pregnant and having a little girl." She swallowed hard, trying to stop more tears from falling uncontrollably. "We've decided on a name - Elizabeth... Elizabeth Castle." Tears now started to stream down her face.

"Mom, I- I wish you were here... I wish you could see your grandchild grow up." Her face contorted with raw emotion. "I miss... you.. so... much," she gasped, tears flowing freely. Jim stepped in beside his daughter, drawing Kate towards him. They stood in silence, shutting out the world as they shared a few moments of grief, comfort and sad tears.

XXXX

Kate and Jim sat in a busy diner, watching the hordes of people moving along the sidewalk just outside the window.

"So, how's my granddaughter doing?" Jim asked after a silent minute or two. Kate smiled before answering.

"Great. She healthy and strong... _And_ she kicks a lot!" Kate replied with a broad smile while Jim laughed at that.

"Sounds familiar," he said, looking at her. "You were quite a kicker yourself, Katie... I remember your mother couldn't sleep for a few nights because you kept her so busy." He looked up at her and smiled again.

"Really?"

"Mmm-hmm." He nodded before taking a sip of his coffee. Kate's smile slowly faded as she turned her attention back to the hustle and bustle of the street.

"I miss her Dad," she said quietly before turning to face him, her eyes shining with newly formed tears. "Especially now." She placed a hand on her stomach. "I wish she could be here." A tear escaped and rolled down her cheek. Jim took a few moments before responding, his eyes fixed on the cup of coffee in between his hands.

"I know you miss her, Sweetie. I do too." He looked up at her, his eyes also glistening with tears. "But Katie, she _is _with you." Kate's brow furrowed at this, her expression quizzical. "She's in you... A part of you." He reached over to take her hand in his.

"And now she's a part of your daughter... She will _always_ be with you. No matter what," he said softly, squeezing her hand. Kate nodded sadly at this as a smile tugged her lips upward and another trail of tears made their way down her cheeks.

"Thanks Dad."

XXXX

"Hey," Rick greeted quietly. He was lying on the couch with a book when she walked in. She flashed him a subdued smile, making her way towards where he was sitting.

"Hey," she replied, plopping down on the couch and immediately cuddling into his side, resting her head in the nook of his arm. She always did this when she sought comfort. Rick sensed this need and pulled her closer to him while planting a kiss on top of her head.

"You okay?" He asked softly after a while, running a hand over her hair. Kate only nodded in reply. They stayed like this for a while before she sat up, turning towards him. She took a few moments before speaking.

"I- I was thinking," she started, her green eyes piercing his blue ones. "I want her to have something from my mother." She placed a hand on her stomach. Rick shifted and looked at Kate intently.

"I want to give her my mother's name." She stayed quiet before continuing. "I want us to name her Elizabeth Johanna Castle," she continued softly, blinking away tears. Rick's expression softened and he smiled at her softly. He placed a hand on her cheek and leaned in for a kiss. He placed his hands on her stomach and lowered his head towards the baby bump.

"Elizabeth Johanna Castle." He turned to look up at his wife again, smiling at her tenderly. "You are a very, _very_ lucky girl to have a mommy like this."

* * *

**A/N: I wanted to bring Kate's mother into this and thougth the whole baby name thing provided the perfect opportunity to do so. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**Review please!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hi y'all! Happy New Year! May 2011 be a blast for everyone!**

**Okay, so I've decided to something a little different: for the next few chapters I'm going to write some flashback scenes of their time together. If you have any ideas or things you want to see with regards to this, let me know. (Italics - flashback). This chapter is inspired by the infamous spoiler from season 3 ep 13 (can't wait!). Now this version is probably not even remotely near to what happens in the episode, but it is inspired by it. I hope you enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer - see the other chapters.**

**(Updated version - I deleted a small detail so that it fits in with my later chapters)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 11 - The Kiss**

Leaning casually against the doorframe, his cobalt blue eyes carefully followed her. Kate was sitting on the bed, chuckling to herself as she studied a photo album; completely oblivious to his presence. She was more beautiful than ever as sunlight, beaming through the window, kissed her skin and stroked her face. She was relaxed, happy and glowing. His mouth slowly curved up into a sentimental, lopsided smile as he observed his wife.

"What are you giggling at?" Kate's head shot up at the sound of his voice. A smile slowly formed on her lips.

"I don't _giggle, _Castle." She arched her eyebrows, amusement clear in her green eyes.

"Yes you do," Rick insisted as he made his way over to where she was sitting on the bed.

"No I _don't_," she countered, deliberately emphasizing the word 'don't'.

"Do."

"Don't."

"Do." He climbed onto the bed.

"_Don't_." She said the word slowly, leaning closer to him; challenging him with narrowed eyes.

"You want me to prove it to you?" He asked, arching an eyebrow. Before she could roll her eyes at him, he pounced. She wriggled involuntarily underneath the barrage of tickling he was inducing; her body helplessly captured under his fingers.

"Castle!" She laughed, struggling happily to rid herself of his tickling fingers. "Rick! _Pleeaassee_!" He went on to nuzzle her neck with his stubbled cheek, causing her to squirm even more.

"Okay, okay! Yes, I giggle… I _giggle_!" She admitted, laughing breathlessly. He stopped upon hearing her confession, smirking triumphantly.

"Told you so," he said, pecking her on the cheek before sitting back slightly.

"You don't play fair," Kate mumbled with a pout as she straigthened her disheveled clothes. Rick only shrugged and smiled.

"What are you looking at?" He asked after a few moments; the photos scattered on the bed and the few photo albums lying around catching his eye. He lied down next to her, propping his side onto his elbow.

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Just some memories." She handed him the pack of photographs she had been studying.

He took the pile from her and a smile escaped from his lips. The first photo on top of the pack was a jolly representation of the whole gang at a Christmas party a few years ago. Ryan and Esposito – donning silly Christmas hats – were grinning happily with their arms tossed over each other's shoulders in a fraternal embrace. Lanie and Captain Montgomery were smiling broadly, slightly lifting their eggnog for the camera. Rick and Kate's attention, however, was not with the flash of the lens. Standing in the middle of the group, they were not facing the camera but looking at each other. Unplanned and unintentional, of course. It was a case of _major_ eye-sexing (as Lanie would put it) - cobalt blues locking with emerald greens in a slow, erotic dance. They were in love... and grinning like happy fools because of it.

"Ah, that was a great party." Rick chuckled at the memory. Kate crossed her legs and leaned back onto her hands, feeling the strain of being seven-months pregnant.

"I remember I had _way_ too much eggnog to drink." A smile teased her lips as she stared straight in front of her, not looking at something in particular. Rick's eyes suddenly lit up as he recalled something. He sat up and turned to face her.

"Remember our hot-and-heavy make-out session in the storage room?" A teasing eyebrow shot up as a playful grin twinkled in his blue eyes. Kate's brow involuntarily creased as she tried to recall the memory.

Soon the recollection came rushing back. "_Oh_… Yeah, I definitely remember _that_," she replied with a mischievous smile. "I also distinctly remember how Lanie caught us… Me missing a shirt and you pants down." She let out a laugh. "That eggnog was quite potent."

"Mmm-hmm, potent enough for you to _ravish_ me, Detective," Rick commented with a devilish grin, waggling his eyebrows at her.

"Me ravish you?" Kate looked at him, her eyebrows shooting up in disbelief. "No, no, no Writer Boy." She waggled a finger at him. "I clearly remember how you _lured _me down there and took advantage of my tipsy state."

He sighed leisurely. "It was fun, though," Rick replied wistfully, his mind going back to that storage room.

"A lot of fun," Kate admitted with a broad smile. He sat up beside her, lifting his knees toward his body and clasping his arms around them. He playfully bumped her shoulder with his as a boyish grin crept up his lips.

"Remember our first kiss?" Kate dipped her head and fixed her eyes on her hands in her lap; she coyly chewed on her lower lip as a shy smile tugged at her mouth. Looking up at him, a small grin graced her features.

"Yeah... How could I forget?" The soft reply came.

_..._

_The wind swirled and howled miserably. The icy winter night was unfeeling, inhospitable and bitter as gloomy shadows washed over the city. T__he two occupants of the Crown Vic were sitting in the cold darkness; watching and waiting. They found a strange sense of solace in the blackness and quietness. The only sound came from the car radio - softly sounding out song requests and Christmas wishes. _

_Religiously, emerald eyes scanned the surroundings while cobalt blues fervently studied her. Detective Kate Beckett, stony-faced and stoic, was a study in concentration as she kept her attention fixed on one of the adjacent wharehouses. She took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. _

_Tonight she was laying to rest the ghosts that haunted her. Tonight she would take vengeance. Tonight Johanna Beckett would finally get justice. _

_Her jaw clenched at this thought and she shifted tersely in her seat, not removing her eyes from where they were focused. Her partner, on the other hand, was studying his muse closely. They had been quiet for a full twenty minutes - no easy task for Richard Castle, the Master of Words. He knew better, though; she needed time to process the events that had led them to this moment. Despite this, Rick desperately wanted to reach out to her, take her hand in his or tuck that curly, chocolate brown strand falling on her cheek behind her ear. He wanted to hug her, hold her close, comfort her. But, as with everything with them, it was complicated and messy. For now they were (professional) partners, nothing more. He had to be content with that. __Rick reluctantly dragged his eyes away from her to rather focus them on his iPhone. _

_After another minute or two, Kate let out a sigh and turned to look at him. Her mouth revealed a whisper of a smile as she watched him - cutely frowning as he punched away on his phone, not aware that she was looking at him. She shook her head and pursed her lips to get rid of the smile. _

_"Watching porn again, Castle?" Rick's head snapped up at the sound of her voice while she smirked at him sardonically. He was momentarily taken aback, but recovered quickly._

_"Haha. No, Detective." His mouth curved up into a mischievous grin. "I've tried it before - the screen is too small." She rolled her eyes and shook her head, strands of hair falling off her shoulders. _

_"Nah, I was just texting Alexis," he continued in a softened tone. Kate nodded and turned her attention back to the window; her expression growing serious again. He watched her, wishing he could bring some comfort, some peace of mind._

_"Hey... you okay?" He ventured cautiously. She turned back to face him, seeing the sincere concern etched in his eyes._

_Kate took in a breath before answering. "Uh... yeah." She shrugged while avoiding his gaze. Silence once again descended. "I don't know if I can do this," she admitting softly, locking her eyes with his. Her eyes, suddenly moist, were now turned to her hands, clasped tightly in her lap. Rick leaned in and softly took hold of her chin, turning her face towards his; the proximity between them rapidly decreasing. They locked eyes again and something shifted as they did. Butteflies started to flutter and heart rates went up._

_"You can and will do this... You're Detective Kate Beckett form the NYPD. The best damn cop they have," he said forcefully with a brief smile, arching his eyebrows. "And you are... extraodinary." His voice was deep and slightly hoarse. __She shallowed hard and licked her lips. His eyes flicked to her mouth and then back to her emerald greens. Kate recognised the same desire in his expression than what she was feeling. 'He really is ruggedly handsome,' the thought idly rushed through her mind. He moved his hand from her chin to lay it against her cheek, letting locks of her hair fall over it. He shifted closer, closing the gap between them even more._

_"Kate," he whispered; his voice making love to her name. She shivered at the sound. _

_"I need to get some air," she blurted out, pulling away and opening the door. In a flash she was outside the car, far away from him. From his eyes. From his hands. From his lips. _

_But, in true Richard Castle form, he followed her; not allowing her to run away from him like she did on so many other occassions. He kept a safe distance between them in an effort not to spook her._

_"Beckett."_

_"This is too much...," Kate said, ignoring him, as the storm of different emotions crashed over her. _

_"Kate." He ventured closer. She wasn't looking at him._

_"What if they get away?" She continued her soliloquy; Rick now standing closely next to her. "What if I let her down again?" She turned to look at him, eyes brimming with unshed tears. He drew her to him and placed a hand on her cheek. He met her eyes, his expression serious and ardent. _

___"You won't let her down." He dipped his head slightly in an effort to hold her gaze. "You could never let her down, Kate." His voice dived a few octaves as he said her name again. His eyes flicked once more to her lips and back again. A hand on her back drew her to him, while his other one went around her slender neck and in between brown locks. Before she could respond, his lips enclosed hers. It wasn't tender or deep or even passionate. It was a kiss of comfort. A kiss of need. A kiss of longing. Without warning, the walls that had kept everything neatly tucked away and out of reach, were torn down, allowing a sea of feelings to rush out. _

___When they broke apart, they were different. Everything was different. The world had shifted. Their worlds had shifted. And it would never be the same again. _

___Richard Castle and Kate Beckett would never be the same again._

X-X-X-X-X

_The broken locks were a warning_

_You got inside my head_

_I tried my best to be guarded_

_I'm an open book instead_

_

* * *

_

**A/N: There you have it. I hope it was decent. I found this chapter a bit challenging, probably due to the emotions. Anyway, thanks for reading.**

**Please review and tell me what you think. If you have suggestions, let me know.**

**P.S. the last part is lyrics from a beautiful song from Lifehouse called "Broken".**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thank you for all the kind reviews! **

**This was supposed to be one chapter, but I've decided to divide this flashback theme into more chapters. So the next few chapters after this one will be flashbacks directly following the one provided here. **

**Btw - the title has nothing to do with the first part; it will become clear later on.**

**Enjoy! (Italics - flashback)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 12 – The Confession, part I**

"You know who I really, _really_ didn't like?" Kate, who was very close to falling asleep, slightly lifted her head towards him. They were lying on the bed, photo albums still strewn about; Kate was on her side with her head on his chest while he had an arm wrapped around shoulders. He idly ran his fingers up and down her arm while she absent-mindedly drew patterns on his chest.

"Who?"

"Josh."

"_Josh_?" She pressed herself up onto her arm and looked at him in confusion.

"Yeah, you know McDreamy… Dr.-I'm-too-sexy-for-my-shirt." Kate pursed her lips to stop from smiling.

"Oh." She arched her eyebrows and went back to her original position. "He wasn't so bad," she commented lazily with a shrug.

"Gmmff… He was an ass," Rick snorted, wrapping his arm closer around her.

"You just didn't like him because you were jealous," Kate replied with a sardonic smirk. Rick reluctantly groaned in agreement.

"Well, you didn't like Gina much."

"I don't have a problem with her… _now_." He lifted himself onto his elbows, looking down at her.

"_No_, but can you honestly tell me that you didn't want to rip her arm off and beat her with it when we were still together?" He smirked at her, knowing full well how jealous Kate really was. She narrowed her eyes and bit her lower lip, taking a few contemplative moments before answering.

"Yeah… okay. I was jealous. Just a little bit." She gestured with her fingers, smiling cutely.

"Just a little bit?" Rick lowered his voice and arched his eyebrows.

"Mmm-hmmm." Kate replied with a childlike nod.

"You're a bad liar, Mrs. Castle." He leaned in closer and gave her a peck on the lips. They returned to their original positions. She let out a tired yawn and draped an arm around his waist.

"For what it's worth… I'm glad you broke up with her."

"And I'm glad you broke up with McDreamy," he replied in a sleepy murmur before planting a kiss on top of her head. Amid the soft, rhythmic pelting of rain against the window, sleep cast its hypnotic spell, dragging them into a deep, restful slumber.

Everything as it should be. As Fate intended. As the laws of love declared.

...

_Rick Castle was grinning like an idiot. A happy idiot. A whistling idiot. A grinning, happy, whistling idiot in love. He stepped out of the elevator, failing for the umpteenth time to stop from smiling, and walked towards her new apartment. He was as giddy as a teenage girl while approaching her door. It was early on Monday morning and he came bearing gifts – coffee, bear claws, donuts and muffins. A full three days had passed since 'The Kiss'. They didn't have time to consider or discuss what had happened, but he couldn't wait any longer. He wanted to see her… and maybe kiss her again. And again. And again. And again. Until they were both old and gray. _

_As he knocked on the blue door, he fantasized about how she would leap into his arms and beg him to make love to her. Or how she would hungrily grab him by the shirt and yank him up against the door before having her wicked way with him. His pleasant thoughts were interrupted when the said door finally swung open. _

_However when Kate saw him, the last thing on her mind was having her way with Richard Castle against her front door. Her expression was a mixture of surprise, apprehension and alarm. _

"_Castle! W- What are you doing here?" She asked with a perplexed frown. _

"_Breakfast!" He answered as if it was obvious, lifting the cup holder and brown paper bag._

"_I.. uh, you-" she stammered, her eyes growing wide. 'No, no, no!' the thought frantically rushed through her mind._

"_Did you know in Medieval England, beer was served with breakfast?" He was still beaming as he, uninvited, stepped past her into the apartment. Kate reluctantly closed the door and took in a deep breath. _

"_- Now I didn't bring any beer-"_

"_Castle-," Kate tried to stop him, a hand rising to her forehead._

"_- but, I did bring your favourite," he continued. He lifted up the coffee cup with a boyish grin._

"_Rick-," she tried again, walking towards where he was standing at the kitchen counter._

"_I didn't know what you felt like, so I brought bear claws, donuts," he rambled on, still smiling and failing to see her less-than-happy expression. "And, uh-" He searched the brown paper bag. "-oh, muffins!" He turned to look at her with childlike enthusiasm. _

"_Castle, I-"_

"_Kate?" A deep male voice called from her room. Kate momentarily closed her eyes while dropping her head. She ran a hand through her hair and pursed her lips. Rick's expression went from excited to confused; eyes darting between her and the location of the faceless voice. _

_After a few moments, the culprit stepped out. Josh, still putting on his shirt, emerged from her bedroom with his 'I-just-got-laid'-expression clear for everyone to see. Including Rick. _

_It felt like a sucker-punch, low and hard. It almost left him breathless and spinning. _

_Like a patient being taken off morphine, pain slowly and dully started to spread throughout his conscious being. He couldn't fathom what was happening. _

"_Uh… Rick, hi," Josh greeted with a surprised frown. He came to stand next to Kate, placing an arm around her waist. "What are you doing here?" He asked, oblivious to how Kate tensed at his touch or how Rick's eyes were burning holes into her. _

_Rick's expression was stony, even as the pain he felt became more marked. His eyes briefly flicked to Josh's arm around Kate and to then to her; the source of both his hurt and happiness. Within the space of a few seconds, Kate Beckett went from being his benign and inspiring muse to a ruthless goddess demanding his heart on a sacrificial altar. _

"_Uh… I," Rick started to answer; his blue eyes ablaze as he fixed them on her. Kate ducked under his intense stare and looked away. "I… was in the neighbourhood." He turned his eyes to the man holding her. "And… thought that I would pick… Beckett up." He smiled without humour and his eyes briefly shifted back to a guilt-ridden Kate. She nervously ran a hand at the back of her head and neck, avoiding his blue eyes at all cost._

"_Oh, okay." Josh shrugged casually. "Listen, baby, I need to get going." He glanced at his watch. "I have some rounds to do," he continued, picking up his bag, helmet and black leather jacket. Kate only nodded in reply, not daring to look at Rick. Josh gently took her arm as he walked towards the door._

"_Thank you for last night… I really, really enjoyed it," he said in a lowered tone, flashing her a knowing grin. Kate's mouth briefly pulled up in an awkward response. Unfortunately, Rick could hear everything that Josh had said._

_He momentarily closed his eyes, feeling like someone had just slapped him. Hard. _

_Before Kate could respond, Josh pulled her in for a lingering kiss. Rick roughly rubbed a hand over his face as he turned around, unable to watch any longer._

_He hated Josh. He hated the man who could kiss her whenever he liked and for how long he wanted to. But most of all, he hated him because he could take kisses from Kate Beckett for granted._

_He wanted to be that guy._

_But Rick Castle only got one chance. One kiss. One singular, heart-wrenching and world-shifting (clearly only for him) kiss. He couldn't believe it and didn't want to accept it. _

_Finally, Josh left and Kate closed the door. She leaned against it for a moment, her eyes briefly closing in regret. When she turned around, Rick was watching her, his blue eyes pained and hostile. Her heart recoiled at his expression and she was deeply disturbed by what she saw. It was a mixture of hurt and disappointment. She had hurt and disappointed him… and he didn't deserve it. To the contrary. _

_They observed each other cautiously for what felt like hours. Finally, Kate cleared her throat and spoke. _

"_So I guess we should get going, Castle," she said uncomfortably attempting to smile at him. He momentarily threw his head upward, letting out a sigh and arching his brow. His eyes darted around as he slowly nodded in defeat. 'You're not even going to acknowledge it, are you Kate?' he thought as his eyes found hers again. A rueful smile attempted to tug at the corners of his mouth, but he warded it off with a shake of his head._

"_You know what… I-," he started distractedly with a frown. "I just remembered… that I had an appointment with Paula," he lied. They both knew he did. She started to say something, but was cut off when he continued. "I mean you're probably only going to do paperwork today." He shrugged and gestured with his hand. He could barely look at her as he started to walk towards the door._

_Kate wanted to stop him and say that she was sorry, but it was too late. He was already closing up. As he opened the door, she spoke again._

"_Rick." He turned around to face her; expressionless and unsympathetic. "I'll call you when we have something." He looked at her for a lingering moment._

"_You do that, Beckett." Her name died coldy on his tongue. With that he walked out, brutally shutting the door. _

_It was over even before it began. He dug his hands deeply into his coat-pockets as his shoulders slumped involuntarily. Richard Castle was a pitiful sight as he lethargically walked down the hallway._

_Kate Beckett, the woman he trusted with his life and loved with soul, had just ripped his heart out. He could almost feel how pieces of it fell to the ground with each step he took; the place where it once was had been relegated to a bleeding hole in his chest. _

_As he stepped into the elevator – now just a foolish and heartbroken idiot – he realized that there were a few things he suddenly didn't like anymore. This included early Monday mornings, impromptu breakfasts and most of all, world-shifting kisses. _

_X-X-X-X-X_

_You cut me open a__nd I_

_Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding_

_Love_

_

* * *

_

**A/N: The next chapter will follow from here.**

**Please review and let me know what you think!**

**Thanks for reading. **

**P.S. - the last part is lyrics from Leona Lewis' 'Bleeding love'. (Probably obvious to everyone, but I just wanted to acknowledge that)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Okay, so the last chapter was a not-so-nice experience and I'm afraid this one is also still quite angsty; hence the little fluffy anecdote at the beginning. ****But don't worry it all ends well... obviously. And there will be major fluff ahead in future chapters.**

**I hope you enjoy it! This is a very long chapter, see for yourself. I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes.**

**Disclaimer - see the other chapters**

**(Italics - flashbacks)**

* * *

**Chapter 13 – The Confession, part II**

"Rick! That's my toothbrush!" Kate exclaimed, her voice dripping with exasperation. She hated when he did that… which was quite often. Rick – dressed in cartoon-themed boxers and a gray t-shirt – swung around from where he was hunched over the sink and saw her looking at him disapprovingly. She stood with a hand on her hip, tapping her fluffy slipper-clad foot in irritation; her expression stern. He glanced at the red toothbrush in his hand and back to her, smiling sheepishly with white foam tumbling out of his mouth. He couldn't help but notice how cute she looked with bed hair and in her pink pajamas; trying to look scary with a seven-month baby bump. It was adorable. But he would never voice those thoughts, not around her anyway. She could still body slam him to the ground or stare him down to his knees. She was still freakin' dangerous – even more so with raging pregnancy hormones.

"How many times do I have to tell you – the red one is mine, the blue one is _yours_." She walked over to the sink. He started to reply, but stopped to rinse the foam out of his mouth.

"Sorry, honey." He gave her best little-boy grin. She returned an unimpressed, blank stare; obviously still peeved. He pursed his lips together in an effort not to smirk at her.

"Oh c'mon now… what's yours is mine and what's mine is yours," he chimed. She ignored him and went on to brush her teeth – very reluctantly – with her red toothbrush. He stepped in behind her, wrapping his arms over her large stomach.

"Isn't that right, baby girl?" He gently rubbed a hand over the baby bump. A smile tugged at Kate's lips while she continued to brush her teeth. After a few moments, she bent forward – with Rick still behind her – to rinse out her mouth.

"Oh, Mrs. Castle! _Now_? _Here_? _In this position!" _He taunted. She turned around sharply, her jaw slightly clenched, her lips coming together in a thin line and her eyes narrowing. She wasn't in the mood for this.

"Castle," she said in warning, raising a finger at him. "_Don't _push me today." She poked her raised finger into his chest. He lifted his hands up in mock innocence; his eyes sparkled playfully, enjoying the reactions he drew out of her.

"Ah, come on KC. I'm just having a little fun." He gave her a broad, infuriating leer. If they were six years old, he would be the boy teasing her, tearing down her sand castles and tugging her pigtails. She had a love/hate-relationship with Richard Castle the Teaser; sometimes he amused her and other times – like now – he made her want to scream in frustration.

"Yeah, well. I'm not in the mood for your games," she mumbled, trying to step past him, but he blocked her. She glared at him and let out a labored breath.

"Give us a kiss." He puckered his lips, leaning forward. She pushed a hand into his face and tried to step past him again a few times, but he blocked her each time.

"Urgggh! You're such a child!"

"Just one kiss and I'll let you go… Pinky promise." She rolled her eyes at him before standing on tip-toe and quickly pressing a kiss against his lips.

"Nah-uh-uh." He wiggled a finger at her and smiled as he blocked her path again. "That wasn't a kiss. I want a proper one… with tongue." She was ready to throw a temper tantrum, but that would only give him the satisfaction. Instead, Kate sighed and wrapped an arm around his neck, forcefully pulling his head towards hers. She gave him a hard, deep, searing kiss… with tongue. When they broke apart, she couldn't help but smile.

"See, now was that so hard?" He leered at her in triumph. She only shook her head and rolled her eyes at him in amusement; simultaneously pushing past him to walk out of the bathroom.

"Did you take your Ritalin medication this morning?" She asked dryly, her lips pulling upward. "Because Rick the Six-Year-Old-With-a-Crush is getting on my nerves."

"But you like my childlike enthusiasm, Detective." He pouted, as he followed her into the bedroom. A trademark Castle grin formed on his lips as he reached her. "I know you do." He took the pieces of clothing she had in her hands and placed it on the bed before wrapping his arms around her.

"You can't deny that you've always found me completely _irresistible_." Kate failed to keep a smile from her face as she, again, rolled her eyes at him.

"_No_… I… haven't," she replied coyly, biting her lower lip and eyeing him shyly. "Okay, a little." She gave him a beaming smile.

"Ah-ha! I knew it! Can I please, for the record, get that on tape?" " He leaned in for another kiss.

"You know what?" Kate whispered after a few moments, idly drawing patterns on his chest.

"Mmmm?"

"You'll be even more irresistible if you go down to Starbucks and get me something."

"Oh really?" Rick let out a chuckle.

"Mmmm-hmmm." She nodded vigorously.

"Okay, so what do you want?"

"I'm thinking-" She placed two fingers to her pursed lips, contemplating her options. "- choc-chip muffins!"

"You've had them the the whole week!" He laughed. Late one evening during the week, Kate had made him go to a Starbucks shop a few blocks away because she _needed_ – correction craved – choc-chip muffins.

"What can I say? The heart wants what the heart wants." She shrugged and smiled.

"Or more accurately - a pregnant woman wants what a pregnant woman wants," Rick commented with a grin.

"I can't help it - your daughter seems to like them."

He arched his eyebrows and grinned at her. "Oh, now she's only _my_ daughter?"

"Well, she seems to be developing a sweet tooth like her dad."

"Mmm-hmmm and of course her mother doesn't enjoy the choc-chip muffins."

"Welll…" A smile slowly spread across her features. "Maybe just a bit."

"Uh-huh." Rick nodded his head doubtfully.

"What are you waiting for?" She scowled at him. "Get dressed and go get me those muffins!"

His mouth curved up into a lopsided smile while giving her a mock salute.

"Aye, aye Detective!" He replied before hurrying into the closet to get dressed. She laughed at his silly, childish antics.

And just like that - Rick Castle alleviated her mood, making her feel better. He was her tonic. Her battery charger. Her own personal energy drink. He took care of her and she loved him for it.

Rick had always known how to make her feel safe and happy and, well, lack of a better word... _loved_. Even during the time when she didn't want to admit it to the world.

Or to herself.

...

"_Rick." Her eyes were pleading, desperate. She knew that she had screwed up. Badly. He turned around to face her; expressionless and unsympathetic. Her eyes darted away from his cold stare._

_"I'll call you when we have something," she said in the same manner she had said 'see you in the fall' a few months back when he had walked out of her life. He looked at her for a lingering moment._

"_You do that, Beckett." Her name died coldly on his tongue. She flinched at his tone and the way he said 'Beckett'. She wanted him to say her name again, to call her Kate the way he did the other night. The door flew shut cruelly, making her jump at the harsh sound._

_Kate closed her eyes, dropped her head and let out the breath she had been holding. The only sound audible in her apartment was the rhythmic ticking of the clock that hung next to the refrigerator. Her eyes drifted towards it and, in the process, caught sight of the half-opened brown paper bag and the two – now lukewarm – coffee cups on the counter. She grimaced slightly. This seemingly sweet (and adorably thoughtful) gesture from her partner (or whatever he was now after 'The Kiss') had somehow turned into the ruins of their partnership. It indicated her guilt, her regret. But as the guilt and the regret started to rise to her conscience, Kate suppressed it with an angry shake of her head. She stomped over to the counter and snatched all the items from it, unceremoniously tossing it into the bin in the hope that these nagging feelings could also somehow be thrown out with the trash. _

'_Why should I feel bad?' Kate – frowning – was fumbling with her keys in an effort to lock her front door. It fell to the floor, her hands uncharacteristically jittery. She let out a muttered curse through gritted teeth before picking it up and finally finding the lock. _

'_It didn't mean anything… That kiss or… whatever it was, didn't mean ANYTHING. It couldn't,' Kate thought, troubled, as she walked down the hallway. 'I don't owe Ric- Castle an explanation.' She stepped into the elevator, her brow crinkled in thought as she slid her thumb nail in between her teeth. _

_'We're just partners.' As the elevator doors close, Kate could feel a haunting uneasiness tug at her senses. 'Aren't we?' _

_She knew the answer - they weren't just partners. They haven't been 'just anything' for a long time. But was she prepared to open that door... again?_

_XXXX_

___Rick, f_eeling a little lost, _aimlessly meandered around the streets of New York City; deep in thought. ____'So this is what Edgar Allan Poe permanently felt like... Miserable bastard.' He smirked sardonically, despite himself. _The wind swirled, picking pieces of trash and leaves along the way. The familiar noises of scuffling feet, blaring hooters and angry shouts filled the air. He didn't notice. The only thing he did, however, notice was a (cursed) Starbucks shop. Not the one where he bought the doomed coffee and pastries, mind you, but a spawn of the evil corporation nonetheless. One day he would have his vengeance. One day... if they stop producing such magnificent pastries and stop brewing such mind-blowing coffee. 

___It had been a half an hour since he had left Kate's apartment_. 'Note to oneself - never show up unannounced. You may get heartbroken,' he thought cynically, pulling his blue cashmere coat tighter around his body. He tucked his hands deeply into his coat pockets and snuggled his neck deeper into the blue scarf, trying to ward off the invading coldness. He kept his eyes on the pavement where they observed the multitude of feet shuffling past. His brow was knotted together as he went over the events of the morning... and what happened three nights ago. He shook his head to rid himself of the memories and pursed his lips, looking up. He had a decision to make. Rick set his jaw while he pulled out his phone, spotting a bench nearby and walking over to it. Searching the familiar name, he hit dial and waited for the person to answer. His eyes scanned the surroundings absently, not seeing the people walking past him (except the happy couple holding hands). Finally, the dialing tone came to an abrupt end as the familiar voice rushed through the earpiece.

_"Paula... It's Rick. We need to talk... Yeah, I know... Just-" He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in between his thumb and forefinger, momentarily closing his eyes. __"Just listen, okay? It's about the book tour - I'm doing it... Send me the dates and cities..." He let out a breath and leaned back against the bench. __"I'm finished. I'm not going to shadow her anymore." He sighed again. __"No, she doesn't know yet."_

_XXXX_

_Kate stared blankly at the insignificant scratches on her desk, her palm on her forehead and her fingers weaved through her hair. Every now and again, her eyes would drift - out of their own accord - to his coffee mug with his stupid, smiling, ruggedly handsome face on it and then shift over to his chair. A small smile tugged at her lips when she spotted the initials 'RC', written in permanent marker, on the back of the chair. The smile however faded as her mind unwillingly went over the events of the morning - the puppy-dog confused look he had worn when he saw Josh emerge from her bedroom, how his bright blue eyes had darkened with hurt and the iciness in his voice when had he left. Kate closed her eyes before abruptly getting up. Snatching her already used mug from the desk, she marched over to the break room. _

_A few seconds later, Esposito popped his head just inside, leaning forward against the doorframe. She looked up at him, smiling in greeting. __"Yo Beckett... Where's Castle?"_ Her smile faded and her eyes quickly darted back to the white mug in between her hands.

___"Uh... He- he had a meeting with his agent. Apparently" Her tone was strained. _

___"Oh, okay." Esposito nodded slowly with a slight frown. _

___"Why?" _

___"No reason." He shrugged, briefly pulling his lips downward. "It's just weird not seeing him here... You two are practically joined at the hip lately!" He flashed her a broad grin, expecting Kate to roll her eyes or hit back with a witty snarl. Instead, Kate visibly stiffened at the comment; not daring to move her eyes from where they were fixed - they would certainly betray her serene and calm exterior. Esposito's smile dropped and he frowned at her reaction._

___"Well, I'll just... get back to my paperwork then." She looked up at him and nodded before turning her attention back to the coffee machine. He observed her closely, sensing her tenseness. 'Something isn't right,' he thought walking away. _

_The coffee machine boiled and steamed, strangely mimicking her tumultous emotions. She leaned back, straigthening her arms and pressing her hands flat on the break room counter. She took in a deep, thoughtful breath and exhaled slowly._

_Detective Kate Beckett was a woman who didn't make rash decisions, especially when it came to relationships. She guarded her heart jealously and very, very rarely shared it with anyone. 'Rather safe than sorry' was the meager motto she lived by. __Will had been safe. Tom had been safe. Josh was safe. Rick Castle? Her stomach contracted involuntarily. He was decidedly NOT safe. She believed in ying-ying, not ying-yang. Kate and Rick - definitely ying-yang. Besides, she had already been burned once by Castle. He had pried the possesive clutch she had over her heart away and left her vulnerable and exposed. And what did she get in return? Rick Castle doing what he did best - casually walking off with another woman. It had hurt. A lot. _

_No, she didn't believe in ying-yang. Rick Castle was a love-'em-and-leave-'em kinda guy while Kate Beckett was a one-and-done kinda girl. She stared into the mug as the blackness swirled before converting into the familiar brown liquid. They didn't fit and they never will. But as she walked back to her desk, Kate couldn't help but feel a dull ache in her chest while Rick's voice echoed through her mind: '__The heart wants what the heart wants.' _

_XXXX_

_Tuesday morning..._

_"Beckett, we have a body," Esposito said in greeting. Kate sighed and rubbed a hand over her face. She was used to wake up to these grim words, but it got to her occassionally. Like today. _

_"Where?"_

_"Corner of Lexington and 32nd." _

_"Kay, see you in thirty," she replied wearily before flipping her phone shut. She turned to look at the clock on her bedstand; the red numbers flickering 6:32. She turned back, staring at the ceiling for a few moments. _

_'I should probably let Castle know.' She sighed again. Once again flipping her phone open she searched for the familiar name (he was on speed dial), but hesitated to press the call button. Instead she opted to send him a message._

_XXXX_

_Rick had been sitting in his office since 5h30, the only light coming from his laptop, strangely illuminating his rugged face. He couldn't sleep anymore. Not due to a bouts of inspiration or insomnia... if that was only the case. No, he tossed and turned because of a certain homicide detective. He was thinking about her and when he wasn't thinking about her, he was dreaming about her. In short: Kate Beckett had invaded him completely... and it had become torturous. He fleetinlgy wondered if she had been thinking about him too, but quickly chastised himself for being so ridiculous. Something creaked and his head snapped up, spotting Alexis standing in the doorway._

_"Hey Dad," she greeted softly. His expression softened and he smiled at her._

_"Good morning, Pumpkin." He glanced at his watch and frowned. "Why are you up? Please don't tell me you're studying for a test or something." He looked at her in mock seriousness. "Because, must I remind you, that we Castles have a revered reputation to uphold... for NOT studying for tests." He raised his eyebrows for emphasis._

_She shook her head and just smiled gently as she walked over to his desk. Despite his quick wit and broad smiles, Alexis knew when her father wasn't himself. _

_"No... just couldn't sleep anymore," she replied with a shrug, perching herself on the desk. "What are you doing up?" _

_"Waiting for your grandmother," he quipped with a broad smile which she returned. _

_"She's been in since three. I heard her come in... alone," she replied dryly. He chuckled at that._

_"Oh. Well in that case, let's just say I couldn't sleep anymore."_

_"Why? Inspiration finally hitting you, Dad?" She teased with a smirk. He glared her, narrowing his eyes._

_"I wish! Nah... Seems insomnia runs in the family," he answered wryly, offering her a small smile. _

_He diverted his gaze to the laptop and s__he watched him for a few moments.__"Dad?"_

_"Mmmm?"_

_"Are you okay?" _

_Rick sat back in his chair and rubbed a hand over his face. "Yes, dear daughter of mine, I'm fine." His face lit up for a moment. "Hey, that rhymes!" Alexis just rolled her eyes, very similar to the way Kate did. He noticed it._

_Her expression became serious again. "You know you can't lie to me, right?"_

_"I'm fine, sweetie. I promise," he lied. Even though she wasn't convinced, Alexis relented and changed the subject. _

_"Well, if you weren't writing what were you doing then?"_

_"Oh, I was just checking the dates and cities for my upcoming book tour." _

_Her brow furowed slightly in confusion."Book tour? When did you decide that?" She was surprised; he didn't mention anything about a book tour._

_'Just after Kate ripped my heart out,' the grim thought rushed through his mind. "Yesterday actually. Paula has been hassling me about it for weeks now... So I figured, what the hell. It has been forever since I've done one," he answered with a shrug, keeping his epxression neutral. His eyes, however, lit up after a couple of seconds. "Hey! You could join me! It would be like old times-"_

_"Dad, I have school," she pointed out._

_"Ah school, schmoool," he replied with a derisive wave of his hand. "C'mon, it'll be fun!" She smiled slightly at the thought. He pursed his lips and arched his eyebrows, wearing his famous boyish expression. "Rome is included." He eyed her expectantly. _

_"Rome does really sound great," Alexis replied measuredly. "I mean it would be quite educational." _

_"See! Exactly. And we all know how important education is." She nodded wisely before letting out an excited squeel while he laughed. _

_After a few moments, she spoke again. "Does Detective Beckett know?" _

_The smile fell from his face. "No... I- I still have to tell her," he answered morosely. _

_"When?" Alexis asked, picking up on his sudden glumness. Before he could answer, his phone chimed and vibrated._

_"Speak of the devil," he mumbled, picking it up from the desk. His brow knotted together. 'A message. Why is she sending me a text message?' He sighed opening the message._

_'Castle, we have a body. Corner of Lexington and 32nd. See you there?' He stared at it for a moment, clinging to the hopeful tone that 'see you there?' offered and immediately felt stupid for over-analyzing a text message like some lovestruck teenage girl. _

_"A murder?" Alexis asked._

_"Mmm-hmmm."_

_"Well, guess you're telling her today then."_

_Rick sighed before muttering. "Guess so." _

_XXXX_

_Rick, hands, deeply burried in his pockets walked listlessy to the crime scene greeting a few uniforms on the way. It was another bleak and cold December day; aptly matching his mood. Kate was talking to Lanie and Esposito when she spotted him. She stiffened slightly and held her breath for a moment. She turned around and ran a hand through her hair when he reached them. He greeted the others without his usual zeal, while he and Kate only carefully eyed each other in acknowledgment. Lanie picked up on this and frowned, her eyes darting between Castle and Beckett. _

_"Our vic is Dane McKenzie, an insurance broker," Kate started to fill him in. He listened but did not look at her, rather focusing his eyes on the lifeless and bloody corpse at their feet. "...He has been has shot four times."_

_"Time of death?" He asked, still not looking at her._

_"Between midnight and four this morning," Lanie answered; Rick looking at her._

_"Our boy seemed to have a bit of drug problem," Esposito interrupted. He lifted a small plastic bag with a white powder in it. "We found this on him." Rick looked at him and Kate immediately picked up on it. He was making eye contact with everyone except her._

_"Cocaine," Rick commented vaguely._

_"Esposito, get that to lab for testing," Kate instructed._

_"Will do."_

_"This is probably drug related," Ryan chipped in. _

_"Could be... but why did the drug dealer leave the drugs then?" Kate mused with a contemplative frown and folding he arms. She turned to look at Rick who was still looking at the body intently. "Castle, any-" He abruptly crouched and sat on his heels. She was a little taken aback by this. "-ideas?"_

_"Not yet," he answered sharply. She also went on to crouch and sit on her heels._

_"Do see something?" Just as she asked the question she lost her balance and instinctively grabbed his arm for support. He stiffened at the contact and flitted his eyes briefly in her direction. _

___"No." _He shrugged his arm lightly in an effort to get rid of her hand on it and got up. _Kate tightened her jaw and arched her eyebrows at this. 'Two can play this game, Rick' she thought, gritting her teeth and getting up. _

_"Esposito, Ryan you guys go talk to the witnesses at the bar where he was last seen. Castle and I will interview the wife." They nodded, taking notes. "C'mon Castle," she said briskly, starting to walk away and not looking at him._

_"Whatever you say, Detective," Rick mumbled under his breath; he made no effort to keep up with her. As they disappeared into the crowd of people, the other three silently glanced at each other, puzzled. _

_Ryan was the first one to speak._

_"Is it just me or-"_

_"Or is something seriously wrong with Writer Boy and Beckett?" Lanie interrupted. "No, I also picked up on some major vibes - and it ain't no sexing-vibes."_

_"I bet you guys this is a lovers' quarrel," Esposito said with a sly smile. Lanie lifted an eyebrow at this. _

_A broad smile spread across Ryan's face. "You're on, bro!" _

_"What's the rate?"_ _Lanie asked. "'Cause I'm in."  
_

_XXXX_

_Later..._

_"Do you think Reece did it?" Kate asked, her eyes on the images in front of them. She and Rick were sitting on her desk, observing the full murder board. The case was progressing steadily - they had a suspect and was relatively certain that he was guilty. Ryan and Esposito were getting information on his whereabouts._

_"Yes." He folded his arms across his chest, eyes fixed on the murder board._

_"Good." She shifted uncomfortably. "Me too." _

_Defeaning silence... again._

_They have been edgy around each other the whole day. The usual flirtatious banter and playfulness had been replaced by curt answers and long, tense silences. When they did talk to each other, it was about case. The large white elephant in the room was promptly ignored or carefully maneuvered around. Rick dropped his arms, moved up from the desk and walked over to his chair. Kate did the same a few moments later and dropped down into her chair. She glanced at him for a moment; his head was turned away from her and he was cradling his chin in his hand, staring off into space._

_She lodged her lower lip in between her teeth and ventured to speak, keeping her tone light._

_"You're awfully quiet today."_ _He turned around to face her and smiled briefly._

_"Yeah, well... I don't always talk a lot." He shrugged weakly. __His turned his eyes to his feet, staring blankly at a blotch on the floor. _

_Kate smiled broadly at this and had sarcastic jibe ready on her tongue, but was interrupted when he spoke again; his tone low and serious._

_"I'm going on a book tour at the end of next week..." She shifted, smile disappearing and brow furrowing. "This is my last case, Beckett." He kept his eyes there for another moment before meeting her shocked expression. He locked eyes with her before slowly rising and walking towards the break room. Kate was stunned into paralysis for ten seconds or so before chasing after him. _

_She was visibly upset and shaken. "Excuse me?" She responded, simultaneously shutting the break room door._

_"You heard right... this is my last case," he answered coolly, taking out two cups. Kate's mouth opened and closed a few times; she frowned and shook her head._

_"For how long?" She tried, unsuccessfully, to keep her voice even._

_He straightened and looked at her; his eyes serious and unreadable. "No, Beckett... I'm done after this case." He took in a breath before continuing, his eyes shifting to the coffee machine. "I'm not coming back." His tone was soft and slightly sad. She gaped at him in shock, her green eyes growing wide._

_"W-w-what... Why?" She stammered. He contemplated his answer for a few moments. 'Because I'm in love with you and can't stand to see you with another guy.'_

_"I've done enough research," he answered simply. _

_"But... you're my partner, Castle," she said meekly._

_"I'm NOT your partner, Kate!" He shot back sharply, no longer able to contain the boiling pot of emotions. She flinched, feeling like he had just punched her in the stomach. "I'm not even a cop." His expression grew hard. "In fact, I'm not really anything to you, am I?" His tone was bitter and accusing. Kate stiffened as rage tore through her body. She stared at him for a moment before grabbing his arm and dragging him to a more private office space at the back of the precinct. Pushing him in, she slammed the door shut._

_"Is this about the yesterday?" She asked, her eyes ablaze. "About... the kiss?" _

_"Just forget it." He rubbed a hand over his face. He didn't want to tread on that subject, because if they did he was going to reveal what he felt._

_"Rick... it was only a kiss." Her tone was condescending. "There was a lot of emotion and... it happened. It didn't mean anything. Anything." Of course it meant something. Kate knew it did, but she was doing a pretty good job of convincing herself otherwise._

_"Who are you trying to convince, Kate?" He took a step towards her. "Can you honestly tell me that it didn't mean anything to you?" His voice dropped a few octaves as he reached her._

_She shook her head and she took a step back. "I- I'm with Josh and you're with Gina." Her voice held a tinge of regret._

_"We broke up." _

_Yet another surprise. "What- when?" _

_"We- I ended it over the weekend." He looked at her and Kate became rigid._

_Whe she spoke again, her voice was barely audible. "Why?"_

_"You and I both know why." He took another step towards her. 'Well, might as well go all out and confess,' he thought. "That kiss meant something... You mean something." He tentatively brought his hand to her cheek, his palm coming to rest against her soft skin. "We mean something, Kate." Her heart thumped against her chest as he took another step towards her. Parts of their bodies touched lightly and Kate felt a jolt of warmth go through her. _

_But as much as she wanted get caught up in the moment, her defence mechanisms kicked in. _

_She placed her small hand over his one on her cheek and vigorously shook her head. "No Rick... we can't," she choked out, her eyes flickering to his boring into her soul. _

_"Why not?" His voice was soft and pleading. _

_"I'm ying, you're yang. We don't fit. We're too different." He bent his head towards hers._

_"Bullshit, Detective." His voice was husky and seductive. Kate felt his breath swirl in the tendrils of hair on her forhead and her own breathing became shallower._

_"I'm a one-and-done kinda girl and you're a love-'em-and-leave-'em kinda guy." Her voice cracked and her stomach knotted together. _

_"I can change." He egded ever closer with his head, his mouth hovering just above hers._

_She closed her eyes and bit her lower lip. "You're going to break my heart," she blurted out softly. His blue shot up to meet hers and he stepped back a bit. He looked at her in geniune disbelief as his brow came together._

_"Kate, I would never-"_

_"Yes you would." She sighed and dropped her head briefly, before looking back up at him. "You're a playboy, Rick. A womanizer... You have conquests and... I- I don't want to be one." _

_His face grew taut as he put more distance between them. "So that's your opinion of me?" His tone was strained and quiet. "After three years - three years!" He held up three fingers for emphasis. "After everything we've been through, you still don't trust me." His blue eyes flashed with anger and hurt."I'm the guy who doesn't give a damn about anyone but himself, right?" Couln't she see that he was in love with her?_

_She regretted her harsh words now - he didn't deserve this. He was there when no one else was. He was there last week when she was falling apart. He was her partner and yes, she did trust him. _

_But before she could say anything, her phone rang. She looked at him and reluctantly pulled the blaring phone from her pocket._

_"What?" She barked._

_"Uh, sorry... You okay, Beckett?" Ryan asked warily, hearing her irritated tone._

_Kate sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Yeah, sorry, I'm fine. What do have?" _

_"We know where Reece is."_

_XXXX_

_The ride to the location, which easily could have been very awkward, had been filled by phone calls. First Kate talked to Esposito and then Rick discussed his upcoming book tour - much to Kate's ire - with Paula. But despite the distractions, the air was stiffled with tension. _

_They stopped at a dilapidated, red brick building - Ryan and Esposito already waiting - and sat in silence for a while before Kate spoke. Her voice was even, but strained. "Castle, we have to focus now. So let's just... forget about what happened, okay?" She turned to look at him. He was staring at the dashboard and only gave a singular nod before opening the door and getting out. She threw her head back and let out a breath before opening her door and getting out._

_"Hey, where's our suspect?" Kate asked as she and Rick approached the other two detectives._

_"Third floor, apartment 3b," Esposito answered. _

_"We got the warrant," Ryan added._

_Kate nodded. "Okay, so let's go get him." With that, the quartet disappeared into the building. It was home to illegal immigrants, prostitutes, junkies and drug dealers._

_As they ascended the third floor and began walking down the corridor, Kate pulled Rick back._

_"Behind me, Castle."_

_He shrugged her hand off him and glared at her. "I know the drill, Detective." She turned around and grabbed his shirt, Esposito and Ryan glancing at each other with raised eyebrows._

_"Stay behind me," she hissed angrily, shoving him. They reached the apartment and Esposito thudded the green door with his hand._

_"NYPD! Open up!" Rick was standing a little away from the other three when he spotted a man coming down the corridor. A man who suspicously looked like Wayne Reece, their murder suspect. Their eyes met and realisation dawned on them both. Reece dropped the bag in his hands and grabbed for the gun, untidely tucked in the front of his jeans. He was agitated and high._

_"Hey!" Rick shouted, turning his body completely to face Reece. At this the other three shot their heads up. Reece raised his weapon and pointed it at Rick. _

_And then all hell broke loose. Reece's finger pulled the trigger twice and the bullets traveled to where Rick was standing. Only he wasn't standing there anymore. He was on the ground, pushed out of the way. Shots rained out and gold casings fell to the floor around him, almost in slow motion. __Kate was now lying next to him and there was blood on his hands. He anxiously searched for bullet wounds on himself. 'Impossible... He shot at me,' the thougth rushed through his mind as his eyes skittled towards her. She was motionless, the crimson mark on her white shirt getting bigger. 'Why is she so still?' He sat up, dazed and confused._

_Esposito, gun in hand, was checking the suspect while Ryan, eyes wide in fear, was already on the phone. "We need an ambulance ASAP! We have an officer down." Rick's eyes shifted back to a now twitching Kate Beckett._

_Then it hit him - Kate was shot and that it was her blood on his hands. He snapped out his daze and lunged towards her, frantically pressing his hands on the wounds in her abdomen. Blood was gushing out, dripping off her side and pooling beneath her. It was warm and sticky and not stopping. _

_"Kate!" Her eyes opened and closed sluggishly."Kate!" His voice cracked with panic and his face contorted in terror. "Stay with me! Please, stay with me!" His face was hazy to her eyes as everything swirled around her. "C'mon Kate! Stay with me!" His raw, hysterical voice became dim as darkness overpowered her, pulling her down into its black realm._

X-X-X-X-X

_Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know _

_If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go _

_Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon _

_Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon_

**_

* * *

_**

**A/N: There you have it - the longest chapter I have ever written. _Ever_. I wanted to get the feelings, emotions and build up to the end right. Hence all the detail. The next chapter will conclude this flashback theme and it will have a fluffy and happy ending, of course. :-)**

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**Thanks for reading.**

**P.S. lyrics at the end is from a stunning song from Thriving Ivory called 'Angels on the Moon'.**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: First off, thanks for all the feedback - it's great! Secondly, I know this has gotten really angsty, kinda sad and not really that enjoyable, but bear with me. The sadness is coming to an end in this chapter and it's worth it. I hope. I've also added snippets of present-day fluffiness in between to lighten the mood a bit. **

**This is a very, very, very long chapter - again. **

**Enjoy!**

**(Flashback - _Italics_)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 14 – The Confession, part III**

_Dried blood and the overwhelming odor of iron. Bloody hands shaking. A shocked body shivering involuntarily. Crimson. Scarlet. Red. It was all over him. Her blood was all over him. He grabbed hold of the cold white basin, staining it with his red, shaking hands. Staining it with her blood. He looked up and flinched at his own reflection in the mirror. His clothes were in disarray and tainted with bloody smears; his face was colourless and pale; his blue eyes were teeming with hot tears. __The man he saw wasn't Richard Castle, mystery novelist extraordinaire and carefree playboy. It was a shadow of his former self. His ghost. His lost soul._

_He took a few deep breaths, struggling against the mass pushing up in his throat. After a few moments, he ventured to turn on the tap with a trembling hand. Her blood was now on the basin and tap. He washed his tremulous hands; the bloody, red water slowly disappearing down the drain. Her blood disappearing down the drain. He scrubbed and rinsed and scrubbed and rinsed for what felt like an eternity, still feeling the texture of dried blood on the surface of his palms._

_The shooting flashed through his mind again – Reece pointing a gun at him, he suddenly on the ground, the cracking sound of shots ringing out, the smell of gunfire and then Kate lying next to him on the floor with a dark, maroon pool forming underneath her. He knew exactly what happened – Kate had pushed him out of harm's way and took the hit. She had put herself in the line of fire for him. She had saved his life. It was tragic and very nearly poetic. __His face contorted into an emotional grimace and he gave his head an angry shake. 'Stupid, wonderful, extraordinary, idiot woman!'_

_He gritted his teeth and braced himself against the basin again. His vision was by now swimming. His throat burned, his chest contracted and after a few moments he couldn't hold it back any longer – a paralyzing sob tore through his body, stealing his breath away. Large, heavy and burning drops fell one by one into the basin. His tears mixing with her blood. __He slowly crumpled into a helpless mess, unable to hold himself together any longer. __Sitting on the floor of the men's bathroom in the New York Presbyterian Hospital, Rick Castle gave into the trauma. _

_____Fear colliding with shock. Sorrow colliding with weariness. Love smashed into loss. _There was only one thought echoing through his mind, one tormenting mantra.

_'It should have been me. It should have been me. It should have been me.'_

_

* * *

_

XXXX

It was Saturday night and that meant movie night at Casa del Castle. It also meant pizza, popcorn, ice-cream and other decadent indulgences. Phones were turned off, lights were dimmed and silliness ensued. Lines were mimicked in ridiculous voices and songs from musicals were sung off key... obviously leading to fits of hysterical laughter. Most of the time it was a joyous occassion for all participants, but tonight one participant was less than enthusiastic. One overbearing, incorrigible man-child that is. Because tonight it was Kate's turn to pick a movie from their impressive collection. They usually went for something light and comedic - either involving Hepburn and Grant or Hepburn and Tracy. Tonight, though, Kate picked the one movie that Rick _really_ didn't like, or more accurately, despised.

"Arrghh, do we _reeaally_ have to watch this tonight? Isn't there something else you wanna watch instead? _Anything_?" Kate slowly turned her head towards her husband and lifted an eyebrow. They were comfortably seated on the large black leather couch. Kate, legs curled underneath her, was nestled against Rick who had an arm wrapped around her shoulder. His other hand rested on her large baby bump, gently caressing it and occassionally feeling his daughter's erratic movements.

She gave him a defiant look and pushed play, holding his gaze. "No."

Rick pouted and frowned. "I _hate_ this movie."

"Well man up Writer Boy, 'cause we're watching it," Kate hit back unsympathetically, dropping popcorn into her mouth.

"You do realise you just told me to quote, 'man up', unquote, and watch four hours." He raised four fingers for emphasis. "Four hours of... of Rhett Butthead and Slutlett O'Whora." He snorted derisively. "Why can't I, like other men, just be allowed to man up by drinking a lot of beer and farting in public?"

She turned and looked up at him again. "Firstly, you don't like beer and secondly... _Ew_." Her expression changed from a disapproving frown to amusement. "Rhett Butthead and Slutlett O'Whora? _Seriously_? That's the best you can do?"

"Don't forget Ashley I'm-A-Wuss and.. and uh, brain dead What's-Her-Face, wife of _Ash-ley_,' he said the name with a Southern drawl. "-and mortal frenemy of our dear Slutlett."

Kate strained to contain her laughter, eventually turning to the TV and mumbling. "Don't quit your day job, sweetie."

Rick's expression turned optimistic. "Speaking of which... Hey maybe I could go attend to my breadwinning day job and... _you_ could watch the movie. I already know how it ends." He shrugged innocently. "I don't want to spoil it for you."

Kate narrowed her eyes and flashed him a tight smile. "Nice try, Mr. Castle. But if I could sit through Star Wars for the tenth time, _you_ can sit through the greatest-" He started to protest, but she only put hand over his mouth and raised her voice. "-movie of all time!" She released her hand and grinned at him.

"It's not!"

"_Ricky_, we've been over this before - Gone with the Wind is most definitely the greatest movie of all time."

"Nah-uh."

"Yea-uh."

"Don't think so, my sunflower pit."

She gave him an incredulous look. "Sunflow- you know what, no comment." She held up a hand and shook her head.

"What's wrong with _sunflower pit_? I think it's sweet and endearing... And it suits your _sunny_ personality, Mrs. Castle," he added sarcastically, leering at her. She watched him for a few moments before leaning up and whispering into his ear.

"If you call me that again, _kitten_, you'll be losing something rather important." She sat back and darted her eyes to down to his crotch.

"Well, _we'll_ be losing something rather important," he shot back after a beat, grinning at her mischievously. She, unsurprisingly, rolled her eyes at him.

Rick caught it and looked at her in mock resentment. "You know, I don't appreciate that eye-roll or your bizarre threat to turn me into an enoch... What's up with that by the way?" She only shrugged, watching the screen and eating a handful of popcorn.

"I mean here I am, sitting through Four-Hours-of-Bore for you and what do I get in return?" He gestured with his hand at her. "Attitude! Not liking it, Mrs. Castle, not liking it." By now Kate was grinning at her husband's melodramatic tirade. Her focus, however, was still on the screen.

"Well, too bad. It's called marriage, Castle."

He pouted and mumbled. "It's called sacrifice."

She turned to look at him, a sculpted eyebrow shooting up. "Sacrifice?" Her eyes narrowed and she sat down the bowl of popcorn. "May I remind you, Geekboy, that I had to endure a whole evening of Star Wars a few weeks ago because you weren't 'feeellliiinng' well. Did I complain?"

"No, but you dozed off."

She ignored his comment and went on. "Furthermore, this-" She pointed to the TV. "-isn't a sacrifice. This-" She pointed to her baby bump. "-and bringing _your_ child-" She poked him playfully in the chest. "-into the world, is a sacrifice."

He sighed deeply. "Fine. You win... Are you gonna use the 'I'm-carrying-your-baby'-card every time we don't agree? Because I gotta tell you, that's not fair." He grew thoughtful before continuing. "I guess the only thing that could trump that is the 'I'm-a-married-enoch'-card." At this Kate burst out laughing; bright and infectious. Rick also laughed, not because of what he said, but due to his wife's happy laughter. It was a gorgeous sight and he fell in love with her all over again.

He always did.

After her bout of laughter, Kate wiped a happy tear from her eye and leaned back against him. "Can we now watch the movie, please?" She tucked her head under his chin while he pulled her closer.

"Sure, there's only about three and a half hours left." She smiled subtly at this, her eyes focused on the screen. He pressed a kiss on top of her head, his eyes also (reluctantly) on the screen.

They were silent for about five minutes before Rick spoke again.

"KC?"

"Mmmm?" She responded lazily.

"Promise me you won't expose our daughter to Rhett Butthead and Slutlett O'Whora. My eldest has already been damaged by it."

"Only if you promise to keep our daughter away from Star Snores. Unlike what you did to your eldest. Poor girl."

"Star Snores - oh _funny, _Detective, very funny... Nice word play."

"I know, right?" She looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back before his expression grew serious.

"But a word of advice - don't quit your day job." She laughed and shook her head, returning it to rest on his chest just underneath his chin.

They lapsed into content silence, letting the seconds changed into minutes and the minutes convert into hours. They were carefree with their time together; it was indolent and casual. Not because they did not treasure it, but because they had it in surplus.

They _had_ time to lapse into content silence. Time to spar. Time to fight. Time to make love. Time to create life.

Time, in short, had become their trusted friend. It resided with them now because they were together.

Before that, time had been their tormenting enemy.

_

* * *

_

_Four hours. Four tormenting hours. Waiting, hoping, praying. Kate had been in the OR for four hours, undergoing emergency surgery. There were no definite answers or guarantees. Just hope and faith. The greatest of these being faith._

_Six forlorn figures cluttered the waiting area, tense and silent with fear. Each one was engrossed in thought - praying, begging and pleading. And occassionally imagining their lives without Kate Beckett._

_Ryan was standing, arms tightly folded around himself while he quietly muttered to an unseen Being. Esposito was sitting with his elbows on his knees, rubbing his hands over his face while his eyes closed in fervent supplication. Lanie was sitting beside him, her hand stroking his back absent-mindedly in an effort to provide some form of comfort. She fixed her puffy eyes to something insignificant on the floor all the while shooting up silent prayers. Captain Montgomery sat back in his chair, his expression stern and serious. There was only one verse running through his mind: 'Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil...'. Jim Beckett, already mourning a loved one, moved around in his seat agitatedly; anxiety gripping his heart. His eyes welled up unwillingly as he thought about his daughter - from the girl who he had taught to roller skate to the strong woman who had saved him from the depths of despair. She was his Katie. His little girl. Flesh of his flesh and bone of his bone. He closed his eyes and pleaded in the language of the broken heart that only God could understand. _

_The only one not praying was Rick. He resorted to bargaining. Bargaining on behalf of Kate, on behalf of her life. He wasn't religious and he didn't believe in a supernatural being ruling the universe, but he had faith. Faith in miracles, in fate, in love. If he could, Rick told the Unseen Force, he would happily trade places with her. Unfortunately, as with any tragedy, events could not be undone. Treacherous time could not be turned back. _

_Another few unnoticed minutes ticked by before a figure clad in blue scrubs approached them. Lanie was the first one to notice him and shot up, almost running up to the man. The others hurriedly followed. _

_Once they were all gathered around him, Dr. Joseph Weston didn't waste anytime to divulge the information he had._

_"The operation was a success, but she's still in a critical condition and we will be monitoring her closely. There was quite a bit of blood loss... Luckily for Kate the bullets missed all of her vital organs." Everyone sighed a breath of relief. "Really, she's lucky to be alive."_

_"When can we see her?" Jim asked._

_"The nurse will inform you when you can see your daughter, Mr. Beckett."_

_"Thank you, Dr. Weston... We're all just very relieved that Kate's okay," Montgomery added. Dr. Weston smiled briefly._

_"I can see that. She's lucky to have friends and family like you who clearly care a lot for her wellbeing... Now if you'll excuse me," he said with a nod before walking away. _

_The six figures now dared to breathe easily and smile at the good news. Esposito and Ryan embraced each other while Montgomery patted a relieved Jim Beckett's back with a smile. Lanie was grinning happily from ear to ear, her eyes brimming with thankful tears. She wanted to hug someone and seeing that everyone else was engaged, she looked around for Rick. He had collapsed into a nearby chair, bent forward with his head in his hands. She walked towards him, sat down in the chair beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder._

_"Honey... she's gonna be okay," she whispered soothingly. Rick took a deep breath and after a few moments sat up to look at her._

_"I was really scared," he admitted softly. "When he walked up to us, I..." he trailed off, averting her gaze._

_"We all were, Castle." She took his hand in hers. "Kate is my best friend and if I'd lost her." She swallowed in an effort to keep tears at bay. "It would me take a lifetime to recover."_

_"I wouldn't recover," Rick whispered, focusing on their intertwined hands. "She did it for me, you know?" He looked up at her with a pained expression and she only nodded sagely. They were all aware of what Kate had done - she had risked her life for her partner. It was admirable and noble. No one blamed him and that Rick found disturbing because he blamed himself for what Kate had to go through. _

_"Lanie, I'm in love with her," he confessed quietly, uncertain eyes searching hers. Her expression softened and she smiled at him, a wise and knowing smile._

_"And you're only realising it now__?" She chuckled lightly and playfully pushed his arm. "Damn Writer Boy, you are dense!"_

_

* * *

_

_The only sound in the room was the rhythmic beep of the heart monitor, telling him that she was still alive. Still there. Still fighting. He held onto her hand for his own sanity, not taking his eyes off her. In some irrational way, Rick Castle believed that Kate Beckett would somehow open her eyes if he kept his fixed on her. Even with two bullets to the abdomen, excruciating life-saving surgery and pipes flowing out of her throat, Kate was still breathtakingly beautiful. To him anyway. He, on the other hand, looked terrible - disheveled, unshaven, pale, red-eyed and exhausted. But he couldn't drag himself away; he couldn't reliquish the hope that she would open her green eyes and look at him._

_"It wasn't your fault, Castle," Roy said quietly. Rick's eyes briefly flickered in the other man's direction. He didn't respond._

_"Did you hear me?" Montgomery leaned forward in his seat. "It wasn't your fault," he continued more forcefully, slowly rolling the words from his tongue._

_"It is," Rick snapped, looking up at the other man. "Because of me, she's lying here... Because of me, she's fighting for her life," he continued gritting his teeth. Eyes on her again. Praying. Pleading. Hoping._

_"You didn't pull the trigger," Montgomery responded softly. "What she did was brave."_

_"What she did was stupid," Rick interrupted sharply, still looking at a motionless and eerily serene Kate Beckett._

_"She saved your life." Rick stiffened at this before slowly turning his head in the Captain's direction._

_"Yeah..." He mused sadly, nodding his head. "But I'm the one who should be lying here. Not her." He glanced down at her again, still hoping. "She's too good for this," he whispered, tears starting to blur his vision. He gently brushed strands of unruly hair away from her forehead. _

_"Yeah- yes she is," Montgomery conceded after a few moments, his voice a little shaky with emotion. Consequently, he got up from his seat and made his way towards the door. Before exiting, he turned to Rick._

_"I'll be back in a minute...Take care of her, Castle."_

_"I will." _

_Blue eyes still glued on her. Praying. Pleading. And always hoping. Not just that she would wake up, but that she would be able to hear what he was about to confess._

_"I love you."_

_

* * *

_

_Ten minutes after Rick's silent confession of love, Josh burst through the door of her hospital room - frantic and frenzied. Rick shot up from his chair at the loud intrusion. The two men locked eyes for a few seconds before Josh's eyes darted towards Kate, lying motionless on the bed. He rushed over to her._

_"W-What happened?" He gently brushed a hand over her forehead and cheek, looking down at her with sincere concern and something else Rick recognised: love. _

_Rick dropped his head slightly and sank back into his seat. "Uh... a shoot-out with a suspect. She-" He pursed his lips, struggling to formulate the sentence. "-got in the line of fire." His voice became soft and strangled as the shooting flashed through his mind again and his share in it. An overwhelming wave of guilt hit him and the tormenting mantra once again echoed through his mind: 'It should have been me. It should have been me. It should have been me.'_

_Josh shook his head in disbelief and collapsed into the chair next to the bed, on the other side from where Rick had been sitting. "I- I... was in surgery-" He ran a hand over his contorted face, keeping his eyes on her. "-I didn't know." He leaned in closer and took her hand in his, placing a gentle kiss on it and fixed his eyes - much like Rick did earlier - on Kate. _

_Rick became acutely aware that her hand wasn't in his anymore. That his eyes were not the only pair glued to her. That his lips weren't the only ones begging silently. That his heart wasn't the only one holding her. __They sat in silence for a while before Josh looked up at Rick, noticing his scruffy appearance and the exhuastion etched underneath his eyes._

_"How long have you been here, man?" _

_Rick rubbed his eyes with his fingers before pinching his nose with his thumb and forefinger. "Uh... I'm not sure." He glanced at his watch. "Maybe about twelve hours."_

_Josh watched him for a few moments. "Thank you," he said softly. _

_"You don't have to thank me." Rick turned his attention back to Kate. "I'd give anything to take her place," he said softly. For a fleeting moment Josh felt a tinge of sympathy for the forlogned figure. He had always felt insecure about Kate's 'partnership' with Rick Castle and it was the cause of many of their arguments. _

_"Why don't you go home and get some rest, Rick... I'm here now." _

_'I'm here now.' The words stung him. Josh, the rightful owner of Kate Beckett's heart, was there to take care of her. He wasn't needed any longer._

_He inhaled and exhaled slowly, rubbed his hands over his thighs, got up and took one last look at her "Call me when she wakes up." Was his final words before walking out of the room._

_Once outside and standing next to the window, he took a few moments and glanced over to his rival and then back to Kate. A sad smile tugged at his lips. Josh was a good guy, a man who clearly loved Kate and someone that she could be happy with. Someone who wouldn't hurt her or place her life in danger. Someone she could build a life with. The sobering realisation dawned on him: it wasn't about what he wanted anymore - it had become about her. What she wanted and, more importantly, what she needed. Her happiness and wellbeing had become more important to him than his own desire and heart's contentment. The bitter truth was that he had no rightful claim to her heart even if she had sovereignty over his. _

_

* * *

_

_Wednesday afternoon… _

_Rick stood in the doorway, carefully scrutinizing his muse. She was deep in thought and staring out of the window as pallid sunlight softly beamed through. She looked small in the oversized hospital dress and strangely vulnerable with the IV-drip coming out of her slender arm. She was pale and the usual spark in her eyes was dimmed. Rick flinched slightly. This wasn't the Kate Beckett he knew and felt a wave of guilt crash over him._

_He hesitated before lightly rapping the open door. _

_Her head sharply turned in his direction and she automatically sat up, smiling. "Hey." Her voice was faintly hoarse._

_"Hey," he replied softly, walking towards her bed. He stood next to it, nervously fiddling with the bouquet of hand-picked flowers in his hands._

_"Here… I, I brought you these." He smiled shyly and dumbly held out the flowers to her._

_She bit her cheek in an effort not smirk at his nervousness which she found adorable. She took the flowers and inhaled the sweet scent._

_"Thank you, Castle. They're lovely." Her eyebrows shot up slowly as she flashed him a teasing smile. "Well… don't I get a hug?"_

_His brow furrowed in uncertainty._

_"Don't worry. I won't bite." He returned a faint smile._

_'Yeah, but you might break,' the thought involuntarily rushed through his mind as he perused her fragile form. He leaned down and cautiously placed an arm around her midsection, careful not to touch her injury. Kate placed her arm around his shoulder and lifted herself slightly; pulling their bodies closer. Her cheek brushed his, her soft skin colliding with his stubbled counterpart. Her eyes closed briefly and she smiled slightly, breathing him in. Rick faintly turned his head and pressed a soft kiss against her cheek._

_"Welcome back," he murmured against her ear before extracting himself and rising._

_"It's good to be back," she replied softly._

_He sat down, cocked his head and looked at her for a few moments, his expression tender._

_She frowned slightly and bit her lower lip coyly."What?"_

_"Nothing… I'm just glad you're alright." His voice was gentle and his expression lacking Rick Castle's usual mischievousness. "How are you feeling?"_

_She smiled at him, despite the weariness buried in her emerald eyes. "Not too bad for someone who got shot in the stomach." His face dropped at this and his eyes shifted away from hers._

_Heavy silence descended, both of them aware of its presence. _

_Rick suddenly leaned forward and took one of her hands in his. She looked at him and was slightly taken aback by his intense expression._

_"Kate, I'm so sorry for what happened to you-"_

_"Rick… don't apologize to me." She placed her free hand over their intertwined ones. "It wasn't your fault." she continued, softening her tone. He averted her gaze and slightly dropped his head. He wanted to challenge her comment, but opted instead to give a small, singular nod._

_When he looked at her again, his expression was solemn. "Thank you… for saving my life."_

_She met his gaze and shrugged. "That's what partners do." A small smile tugged at her lips. "Besides, I was the one with the gun." Reluctantly he smiled at their joke._

_His phone started to ring, breaking the moment. Rick snapped it out of his pocket and groaned when he read the caller ID._

_"Who is it?"_

_"Paula," he answered, briefly looking at Kate before returning his eyes to the phone. Eventually he cut off the call and turned off his phone._

_Kate smiled in amusement. "What have you done now, Castle?"_

_"Nothing! Well, that's kind of the problem." He paused for a few seconds. "It's about the book tour. I told her to cancel and obviously she flipped. To be honest, I'm sleeping with one eye open - she's kinda dangerous." _

_Kate laughed and he smiled. At least they still had that._

_"Why did you tell her to cancel?" _

_He stared dumbly at her for a while. "Uh… because of the shooting… Because of you." _

_Kate 's eyebrows lifted in surprise. "Me?"_

_He shrugged. "Well… yeah. I mean… I don't want to leave you-" He gestured with his hand towards her. "-here like this."_

_Kate's expression softened. "Castle, I'm fine… Really you should go." _

_"But-"_

_"I don't want you giving Nikki Heat a bad name... I have a reputation to uphold." She smiled at him slightly and he returned one himself."Besides, I don't need you here… I'm well taken care of, I promise," she continued in a light tone. _

_The smile dropped from his face and he only meekly nodded in response. _

_"So...?" Kate arched her eyebrows, waitng for a response._

_"Fine, I'll go," he reluctantly agreed._

_Again, the realisation hit him - she didn't need him. In fact, if it wasn't for him, she wouldn't... He didn't finish the thought. Instead he plastered a smile on his face and put on the Rick Castle show._

_"Tell me, Detective, do you enjoy sponge baths?" _

_

* * *

_

_Thursday…_

_Comfotable silence descended as the fits of hysterical laugther subsided. Kate wiped her eye, smiling broadly at her friend who was shaking her head and letting out a residual chuckle. Lanie was relaying a story from her college days, more specifically a story involving cheesy nineties music, too many tequila shots and bad pick-up lines._

_"I can't believe he said that," Kate said, feeling another bout of laughter coming on. She was still in the hospital, recovering from the operation. Despite still being paler than usual and looking a little vulnerable in a hospital bed, the sparkle had returned to her eyes. Kate Beckett was slowly but surely returning. _

_"Girl, it was a disaster," Lanie replied, smiling. _

_Kate shook her head with a grin. "Poor guy." _

_"Poor guy? Poor guy- Puhlease!" Lanie put up a hand, scowling at her friend. "I'm the one who had to suffer through 'pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?' and 'your daddy must have been a baker, because you've got a nice set of buns.'"_

_Kate laughed again. "That sounds like something Castle would use." The words were out of her mouth and smile on her lips before she could help it. Lanie arched an eyebrow._

_"Writer Boy doesn't need any pick up lines... He's charming enough."_

_A faint smile tugged at Kate's lips as she turned her gaze to her hands in her lap. "Yeah, he is."_

_They were quiet again, Lanie slightly cocked her head and watched her friend closely. _

_"He really cares about you, Kate." Her voice was soft, but insistent. _

_Kate took in a deep breath and nodded. "I know," she said gently, looking at her friend. She turned away and caught sight of the large, hand-picked bouquet of flowers that Rick had brought her the previous evening._

_"And you care about him." Lanie pushed. _

_"Yeah I guess so." _

_Lanie's eyebrows shot up in disbelief. "Guess so? Honey, you took two bullets for the man - that is more than 'I-just-care-about-someone'."_

_Kate pursed her lips and frowned. "He's my partner, Lanie, I would do anything...," she trailed off. She looked down at her hands. _

_Her friend's expression softened and she took Kate's hand in hers. "Give him a chance, sweetie."_

_The dark-haired woman smiled ruefully and shook her head. "Why? So that he could break my heart again? Don't think so," she said with a snort. Despite her tough exterior, Lanie knew how much Kate had been hurt by Rick's departure the previous summer. She found Kate sobbing in the bathroom just after Rick had walked off with Gina._

_"You're still convinced he's a love-'em-and-leave-'em kida guy?"_

_Kate looked at the ME skeptically. "C'mon Lanie, you're not?"_

_Lanie considered her next words carefully, cautious not to reveal Rick's confession of love. "No. Not when it comes to you." Kate felt her stomach churn at her friend's blunt statement. She brushed off her uneasiness and smiled stubbornly at her friend._

_"You're forgetting one small detail, Dr. Parish - Josh. And the fact that I kinda like him. A lot." It was proving more and more difficult for Kate to convince herself of the intensity of her feelings for Josh and to deny the hold Rick Castle had over her heart. _

_"Oh, I didn't forget about him," Lanie replied without skipping a beat. "I just know that Castle's your one-and-done and that you will end up together... eventually." She reached for her purse and got up._

_Kate rolled her eyes and pursed her lips in an effort not to grin. "Castle and I aren't star-crossed lovers, Shakespeare."_

_"Mock me however you want to, Ms. Beckett." She pointed a righteous finger at Kate. "But mark my words - you and Richard Castle are meant for each other… It's written in the stars." She winked at Kate and walked out the door, leaving her friend to chew on her prediction. _

_Kate's forehead crinkled, her brow furrowed and her bottom lip became lodged in between her teeth. She didn't believe in magic or fate or even true love. But as her mind - as it so often did - wandered to Rick Castle and his boyish grin, she felt herself starting to hope in Lanie's stars and what they might offer..._

_

* * *

_

_Meanwhile at the precinct..._

_The Captain leaned back against his chair and carefully considered the man in front of him. In his thirty odd years on the force, Roy Montgomery came across a lot of good men, but there were few who he actually liked and respected. Rick Castle was one of the few. _

_"You're sure you want to do this, Castle?"_

_Rick, who's eyes have been religiously situated on the model football on the desk, looked up at the Captain. He smiled regretfully. _

_"No, I'm not… I don't want to leave... But, Roy, I- I have to-" He paused for a moment."-for her sake."_

_"Castle, the shooting. It wasn't your-" Rick stopped him by putting up a hand._

_"No matter how many times you or Ryan or Esposito or Lanie tell me that… I still can't believe it." His eyes automatically shifted to the window, facing the bullpen. "I- I need to do this," he whispered._

_The Captain sighed, seeing that arguing with a heartborken man was useless. He knew that Rick loved Kate; it was obvious for everyone - except her._

_"She's not going to like it. You know that, right?"_

_He nodded, his eyes perusing the bullpen. Reluctantly he drew his eyes back to the older man._

_His voice was barely audible when he spoke. "I know." He paused for a moment before getting up. "Thank you, Captain... for everything." The two men shook hands before Rick walked out the door._

_Spotting Esposito and Ryan at their desks, he approached them. The two men simultaneously looked up at him._

_"Esposito? Ryan?... I need to talk to you."_

_

* * *

_

_The following Monday…_

___He had been visiting her almost every day since the shooting and each day she was coming back to herself, little by little. The previous visits were light and filled by their usual playful banter, both ignoring the few elephants in the room. Today, however, was going to be different - very different. __His stomach turned in apprehension and chest tightened. He was about to break his own heart and hurt the woman he loved. _

_____But i_t had been decided. Rick Castle was going to remove himself. Remove himself from her world and remove himself from her life in an effort to ease the grip she had over his heart.

_____Rick took in a deep breath and exhaled it slowly before opening the door._

_"Hi," he greeted stepping into the hospital room._

_"Hi." She returned a bright smile._

_He held up another bouquet of hand-picked flowers. "From Alexis and my mother. They send their regards and best wishes." He set the flowers next to her on the bed stand._

_She returned a broad grin. "They're beautiful… Thank them for me."_

_"I will," he replied with a smile._

_He glanced tensely around the room, spotting all the flowers and get-well balloons. His eyes came to rest on a particular bouquet of flowers and a small white teddy bear – dressed in a leather jacket – next to it on the bed stand._

_He grinned as he took it. "I didn't know you were a teddy bear kinda girl, Beckett." For a moment the playful sparkle returned to his blue eyes._

_"Yeah well… there are a lot of layers to the Beckett onion, Castle," she shot back with a grin._

_"What's with the jacket?"_

_"Isn't it obvious? It's a motorcycle teddy bear." She smiled broadly. "Josh got it for me."_

_His eyes zipped to hers and his smile faded slowly, sitting down the toy._

_"He's a good man, Kate." He admitted soberly and very reluctantly._

_She bit her lower lip as her mind went back to the drama that had unfolded exactly a week before._

_"I know," she replied in a whisper. He hesitated before asking the next question, knowing that it could slice through him._

_"And he makes you happy?" Her eyes met his, her brow furrowing in both surprise and alarm at his inquiry._

_She considered his question for a moment, mauling potential answers through her mind. She liked Josh and yes he made her happy… to an extent. She opted for the simple and honest answer of "Yes."_

_A rueful smile pulled at his lips._

_"Good, I'm…" 'I'm happy if you're happy' he wanted to say, but instead opted for "I'm glad."_

_Despite his sincerity, she could see residual longing carved in his cobalt blue eyes. They needed to clear the air. _

_"Rick... about what happened-" He dropped his gaze from her eyes and clenched his jaw. "-I- I'm sorry about what I said... I do trust you." He looked up at her again. "You're my partner and I don't want to mess that up-" she stammered, not sure about what she wanted to say. He looked up at her and held up his hand._

_"I understand, Kate... As long as you're happy." He dropped his eyes again, careful not show how much that admission hurt. He meant it, God knows he meant it. He wanted her, above all things, to be happy. Even if she experienced happiness with someone else. _

_She felt her heart stir with a plethora of feelings and emotions towards the man sitting in front of her. The one question she couldn't answer properly was continuously running through her mind:_

_'Why did I take two bullets for him?'_

_When he spoke, his tone was remorseful and soft, but steady. "I'm so sorry for... everything. From what happened between us and the shooting-"_

_She attempted to cut him off, but he held up a hand._

_"I just wanted you to know that this-" He motioned a finger between himself and her. "Has been one of the best experiences of my life." She frowned upon hearing this._

_"Castle?" Alarm crept into her voice._

_He pursed his lips and avoided her eyes for a moment, before bringing them back to her. "I'm leaving for Europe on Thursday… for the book tour." She nodded slowly._

_"Kate… I'm not coming back to the 12th after it," he said in barely a whisper. She became rigid and her eyes grew wide. He saw the need to clarify his statement._

_"When... I saw you... lying there in your own blood-" He took a breath. "-fighting for your life." He grimaced at the memory. "I lost it… You almost died because of me… I- I can't… do that to you again." His eyes were brimming with tears by now. "I should be the one lying in that bed. Not you."_

_"Don't you dare." She sharply cut him off. "Don't you dare walk away again." She shook her head; her eyes were also swimming by now._

_"Please, don't make this any harder for me than it already is."_

_She shook her head stubbornly, not looking at him and putting up a futile fight against the tears starting to roll down her cheeks. "That's it? You're just walking out?" She turned to look at him, her eyes ablaze. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised." He watched for a few moments._

_"I'm doing it for you," he admitted softly._

_She scowled at him incredulously. "Me? You're doing this for me? You're walking out on our partnership, our friendship for me?" She yelled, livid, while he only listened in passive silence. _

_Turning towards her, he calmly responded. "Yes, I'm doing it for you."_

_"Bullshit!" She spat, blind with rage. "You're just a coward, you selfish son of a bitch!" Angry tears still making their way downward._

_He stood up quietly, watching her for a few moments before leaning down towards her. "Goodbye Kate," he said in a slightly shaky voice, kissing her forehead; his lips soft on her skin. She recoiled in anger and turned her face away from him. He retracted and watched her for a moment, his fingers lightly caressing her cheek. She pulled away even more, unable to stop the current of hot tears now streaming down her face. He finally stood up and walked towards the door. _

_Rick stopped, handle in his hands, and turned back to look at her._

_"I'm going to miss you, Detective," he said quietly, his voice steady and his vision blurry. Kate momentarily closed her eyes upon hearing this, another resentful tear escaping down her cheek. When she opened them again, he was gone. _

_Just like that, Rick Castle had walked out of her life again. And just like that, her heart broke again._

* * *

_Thursday morning 02:00 am… _

_Rick fidgeted with the envelope, hesitating for the umpteenth time to do what he intended. She needed an explanation, he needed to confess and they both needed closure. _

_With that in mind, he bent down and slid the envelope underneath her door. He stood up and did what he did best – walking away and leaving his heart behind._

* * *

XXXX

Kate smiled to herself as she pulled out the crumpled and yellowing piece of paper from the wooden box. It was one of her most valuable treasures along with her mother's ring. Reading it again, her eyes filled with tears once more as it did those many years ago. But this time, the tears were accompanied by a faint smile. She felt her heart flip as it did those many years ago when she first read his love letter to her.

Placing a hand on her stomach where her daughter was kicking fiercely, she whispered. "You're daddy is a hopeless romantic, Lizzy… He believes in magic and in the stars and in true love." Her face split into a wide grin. "But you know what? I'm starting to believe in it too..."

_

* * *

_

_She discovered it under her door the next morning (she had been home from the hospital since Tuesday) and recognised his handwriting. At first, she was torn between throwing it out with the trash or burning it. But as the hours progressed, her curiosity and agitation increased. Finally, she relented, letting desperate curiosity win. _

___She opened the manila envelope addressed to her in _his___ writing. Her hands fumbled as she pulled out the letter, her heart beat wildly against her chest and her stomach churned in anticipation. She waited a few moments before flipping the white paper open. _

**"Kate-"**

_'I love it when he uses my name,' the thought rushed through her mind, unnoticed._

**"-you deserve a proper explanation for why I am doing what I'm doing. Unfortunately, I don't seem to be able to find the right words tonight to tell you what I feel. Words, my old friends, seem to have deserted me in my time of need. You have rendered me incapable of proper expression, Detective. I wanted this to be eloquent and breathtaking and beautiful, but it keeps coming back to one simple thing. To the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life. To the one sin I most ardently confess to – love.**

**I love you, Katherine Beckett."**

_Her eyes welled up as she placed a hand over her slightly ajar mouth._

**"I love you beyond my own desire, beyond my own wellbeing, beyond my own happiness and beyond my own heart's beating. That is the plain and simple truth whether you believe it or not. I hope you do. **

**This has also become my own personal hell because I'm standing in the way of both your wellbeing and happiness and, frankly, I would much rather break my heart than yours. **

**So, here is reason why I'm not coming back, Kate: I want you, need you, to be happy. ****All I ask in return, is that you take care of yourself, have a little fun and live a fulfilled and blissfully happy life. Please, don't make me beg."**

_Kate smiled weakly at this through her blurred vision._

**"You are extraordinary and will always have a sanctuary in my heart. Always, I promise. **

**'I carry your heart with me**

**(I carry it in my heart)**

**I am never without it**

**(Anywhere I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done**  
**by only me is your doing, my darling)'**

**I will miss you for the rest of my life,**

**Rick"**

_One. Two. Three droplets fell onto the letter, limp, in her hands, staining and smudging some of the words. __His words. His declaration. His confession. _

_Tears rolled down her face, slowly and ruefully as the realisation dawned on her. Rick Castle loved her and she loved him. That was the plain and simple truth written in Lanie's stars. _

_As Fate intended. As the laws of love declared. As time assured._

_

* * *

_

_Rome, four weeks and many changes later..._

_"...Couldn't you at least flirt with her?" Paula asked exasperated as they walked through the door of Rick's luxurious hotel suite. "I mean, God, Rick she was practically all over you!" They had been at a charity event earlier the evening where Rick had been a guest of honour. As usual there were a string of gorgeous women who fawned over him. But, unusually, Rick Castle seemed immune to their advances - much to his agent's ire._

_Rick sighed while loosening his neck-tie. He was tired - in more ways than one. He was tired of the book tour, he was tired of Paula's incessant nagging and he was tired of missing a certain homicide detective._

_"I was pleasant enough," he said with shrug, plopping down onto one of the soft chairs._

_Paula's eyebrows shot up as she narrowed her eyes. "The old Rick Castle wouldn't be here right now... alone. He would be having a great time with some beautiful woman."_

_He leered at her and shot back sarcastically. "I'm not alone... and don't sell yourself short, Paula. You are a beautiful woman."_

_She placed a hand on her hip and shifted her weight, tapping her foot in agitation. _

_"You know what I mean." Softening her tone, she continued. "Rick, you need to forget about her." His head snapped up and his expression grew taut. _

_"Easier said than done." His mind unwillingly conjured up the various images he had stored of Kate Beckett. _

_"Yeah well, it would be easier if you have a little fun."_

_"I'm not going to forget her by sleeping with bimbettes and celebutantes," he snapped in irritation. He would never get over her - of that he was sure._

_Paula's eyebrows lifted. "Maybe not, Ricky boy, but it would take the edge off." She sighed, looking at him. "Fine. If you don't want to do it for yourself, then at least do it for me." He only shot her a harsh look._

_"It's late and I'm tired. Do you mind?"_

_She held up her hands in surrender and sighed. "Okay, okay. I'm going." She walked towards the door, stopped upon reaching it and turned around to face him again. "It will get better," she said gently. His head dropped at this._

_"Thank you." He looked back up at her again and his lips pulled up into a frail__ smile._

_"Bright and early tomorrow, Ricky. Bright and early." With that, Paula departed, leaving him alone with his thoughts... of her. Fantasies of her. Dreams of her._

_He sighed heavily, got up and poured himself a drink before dropping onto the chaise longue, his back turned towards the door. _

_For the next fifteen minutes he remained there, his only solace the alcohol burning down his throat and the only sound, the ice cubes clinking against the inside of the glass in his hands. His mind, as it did each night and every day, drifted to her. To images of her scowling, rolling her eyes at him, frowning in concentration and smiling. God, her smile. He would never forget her smile. The last image to rush through his mind, however, was the one of her crying the night he left. He closed his eyes and shook his head in an effort to rid himself of the memory. He sighed, unwilling to get up. A few more silent moments later and almost drifting to sleep, Rick heard a door softly opening and closing and faint footsteps nearing him. He groaned and slumped even more. _

_'Paula,' he thought agitatedly. _

_"I fear no fate-" Rick tensed. "-for you are my fate, my sweet." That voice. He would know that voice from anywhere. He sat up slowly and turned around, pleading that his senses were not betraying him. Praying that fate wasn't playing a cruel joke and begging that love was not mocking his hopeful heart._

_And there she was, more dazzling than ever; her hair falling softly across her face and off her shoulders and her green eyes shining brilliantly. He stood motionless, his heart slamming against his chest. The woman standing in front of him wasn't the fantasy that captivated his mind every day or the muse who occupied his dreams each night. This was the real woman who had invaded his every thought and fuelled his every desire. The real Kate Beckett, sovereign of his heart._

_"I want no world, for beautiful you are my world, my true," Kate continued, softly smiling at him. He moved closer ever so slightly, a large smile teasing his lips._

_"And it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you." She paused for a few moments, her eyes glittering with warm affection. She took a step closer. "Here is the deepest secret nobody knows." The small grin that pulled his lips upward now blossomed into a beaming smile. He took a few steps closer to her._

_"Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life which grows higher that the soul can hope or mind can hide." They were now in touching distance from each other. "And this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart." Kate moved into his personal space and placed a hand on his chest. Her eyes became moist as she looked up at him. "I carry your heart... I carry it in my heart," she concluded with a whisper. He looked at her, his eyes glistening with emotion._

_"Kate-" She placed her fingers to his lips and pursed her own._

_"I have a confession to make." She paused for a moment; emerald greens locking with cobalt blues. "Richard Castle." Her voice was soft and tender. "I'm in love with you." A smile pulled his lips upward. "I love you beyond my own wellbeing, beyond my own desires and beyond my own heart's beating... to paraphrase a famous author," she added with a grin, before growing thoughtful again. "What I did... taking those bullets... I didn't do it for you." His brow furrowed at this. "I did it for your family-" She paused before continuing. "-and me." She again pursed her lips into a thin line in an effort to control her emotions. "__Because if I lost you... I wouldn't survive it."_

_He gently pulled her closer with one hand while the other hand gently tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear. He went on to gently rub away the tears streaming down her cheek, ignoring the tears slowly rolling down his own. _

_When he spoke after a few moments, his voice came out as a hoarse murmur. "You.. are... stunning." He darted his eyes over her features; from her eyes to her lips and back again. He slowly bent his head towards her, letting his lips hover above hers for a moment. "I love you," Rick whispered._

_Simultaneously, both pairs of eyes closed as their lips met in an unhurried, soft and warm dance. In this moment, time stood still as their lips confessed silently to one another, making all things new. _

_Finally they broke apart, both pairs of eyes glazed over with unbridled happiness. Rick placed his forehead against hers and smiled broadly which she mimicked. "Best. Speech. Ever." Kate laughed and rolled her eyes._

_They met for their third kiss - unrestrained and impassioned. The two almost lovers were completely unaware of how brightly Lanie's stars shone in the night sky or how Fate had conspired with time to bring them to this moment. To them. To the beginning of their life together._

X-X-X-X-X

_If you wait for me then I'll come for you _

__

Although I've traveled far

I always hold a place for you in my heart

If you think of me If you miss me once in awhile

Then I'll return to you

I'll return and fill that space in your heart

_

* * *

_

**A/N: Okay this is OFFICIALLY my longest chapter and man what a chapter to write! Phew, it got pretty complicated and detailed. I wanted to add something at the end, but decided to leave it, it really just got too long. Sorry if it got too much, but it's important for me to get the emotions right and not to rush things. And I really wanted to end this theme of flashbacks.**

**I apologize if there are any spelling and grammar mistakes; I will correct them if I spot them.**

**I hope it was satisfying. Please review and tell what you think.**

**P.S. Lyrics at the end is from my favourite song of all time, "The Promise" by Tracy Chapman. The poem I used in Rick's letter and Kate's speech is E. E. Cummings' "i carry your heart." It's stunning, isn't it?**

**Anyway, I also just want to let you know that I might not be updating for a while because I have a thesis to write. *Bleh***


	15. Attention: Readers

Hi folks…

Sorry, no this is unfortunately not a chapter, but I do want your opinion. Someone asked me to add an epilogue to Chapter 14 ('The Confession'-series) and I would like to hear what you think.

Should I:

**a) Write a flashback (sort of an epilogue) of their time in Rome, picking up where chapter 14 ended**

**or**

**b) Continue with present-day fluffiness, occasionally throwing in flashbacks (I still have a whole series of flashbacks I want to do)**

So, lemme know what you want to see. You can give your answer in terms of a review or PM me. Btw - any ideas would be appreciated; if you want to see something in this series, let me know.

Thanks again for reading and for all the wonderful reviews. You are great!

Regards,

Ghost Writer 77


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Firstly - thank you for all the wonderful reviews (30!) for chapter 14 - I was totally blown away! **

**Secondly - thank you for the feedback on my little poll/questionnaire thingy. I've decided (after one reviewer suggested it) to write a prequel to 'Mr. & Mrs. Castle' showing how their relationship developed from Rome onwards (so I will be giving you some Rome goodness). Don't ask me when I'll start on that one - I have no clue. This is turning out to be a very guilty and very distracting pleasure for me... Just don't tell my thesis supervisor. But somehow sexy Castle and gorgeous Beckett is just so much more alluring and fun to write about than Robert Mugabe the Senile Tyrant. Can't imagine why****. *Shrugs***

**For now, though, I'll continue to write present-day fluffiness with a few flashbacks thrown in. Now I know that this chapter may be a bit of a letdown after the intensity (and length) of chap 14, but I just wanted to write something short, sweet and light. And we're getting close to the baby's birth now, just a few more chapters.**

**I hope you enjoy it!**

**(Flashbacks - Italics)**

**Disclaimer - don't own it, although I would like to make Nathan Fillion mine... *Sigh***

**(Btw - 'Knockdown' was excellent! They should just get together and make Castle babies already... like in my story. Alright enough incoherent blabbering.)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 16 – The Proposal**

The front door of the loft softly clicked open and a certain very weary and very pregnant detective stepped into her – _their_ – home. She let out a breath, closing the door and rubbing her sore neck with the other. It was only after she absent-mindedly dropped her purse and coat onto the nearest table that she became aware of the dimmed lights, soft, melodic background music and the romantic flicker of candles. A whisper of a (surprised) smile twirled her lips upward as she carefully walked further into the living room area. Her husband, however, was nowhere to be found.

"Rick?" No answer. He wasn't in the kitchen where something delectable was slowly simmering inside the stove. She walked towards his study and peered inside.

"Rick, honey?" No one. Her brow furrowed slightly. Just as she started to make her way towards the stairs, he descended them. He was clad in slightly worn, light blue jeans (the jeans that hugged his ass nicely, Kate always thought) and a crisp white button-down shirt with the sleeves casually rolled up; he was barefoot and his hair was faintly damp (from a quick shower) and cutely tousled.

'_Sexy, very sexy,' _Kate thought, quirking up an appreciative eyebrow as she slowly perused her husband's fit body.

"Aaahhh, you're home." His whiney tone and somewhat sulky expression snapped her out of her daydream. She shot him an unimpressed look as he came to stand in front of her.

"Geez, enthusiasm much?" He wrapped his arms around her large middle and grinned before giving her a quick peck on the lips.

"I was actually planning on running out and buying you some flowers." He shrugged. "But now you're early." Kate eyed him skeptically.

"Castle, what did you do?" She shot back after a beat. He let out a laugh.

"Wow, after three and a half years of marriage and you still don't trust me to buy you flowers because I felt like it… It hurts, Detective."

"Yeah well all the other times you bought me flowers were either because a) we had a fight or b) because you did something that would lead to a fight." He only returned a sanguine smile before replying softly.

"Not this time." He dipped his head and met her lips for a slow, lazy and sensual kiss; both savouring the unhurried union of their mouths. Breaking from the kiss, he placed his forehead against hers and smirked.

"You haven't told me how sexy I look tonight, KC."

Kate snorted and chuckled.

"Oh puhlease, Writer Boy. Don't flatter yourself." The truth, in fact, was that she was struggling against the impulse to rip his shirt off and making him her love-slave for all eternity.

He dropped his arms from her waist and returned a lopsided grin, making his way to the kitchen.

"Mmm-hmm, whatever you say Detective. I see the way you're looking at me – practically undressing me with your eyes." His expression converted into a mock scowl. "In fact, I actually feel kinda _used_ and _dirty_."

"You've never had a problem with that before," Kate said, sniggering while taking a seat on one of the stools at the kitchen counter.

"Touché," he responded with a smile, placing a glass of grape juice in front of her.

"So what's the occasion?" Kate asked as she scanned the dimly lit surroundings.

"Nothing… Just thought we could have a quiet evening at home. You know, before the baby comes," he replied with a small shrug while busying himself at the stove. He was impossibly cute when he was being coy... And downright burning-the-house-down sexy when he was being all domestic in his ass-hugging jeans.

"Date night, huh?"

He looked up at her with a softened expression. "Yeah, something like that." They smiled at each other. Rick may be a child sometimes and drive her up the wall in irritation, but he knew how to make up for it. He knew how to make her happy. How to love her.

"Sounds nice... Thank you, Mr. Castle."

An impish grin slowly pulled his lips upward.

"I'm getting lucky tonight, aren't I?" Instead of her usual eye roll or snarky comeback, Kate surprised him.

"Looking like that?" She gestured with her hand towards him. "Definitely," she said with her own devilish grin.

Rick let out a laugh. "I knew it!" He pumped his fist in the air. "Score!" An amused eye-roll and reluctant smile were the only responses.

* * *

XXXX

_He was going to do it. __Tonight was the night ('Eye of the Tiger' had been his refrain for the whole week). He had the perfect evening planned - a home-cooked dinner, flickering candles, soft music, a heartfelt speech, good wine... lots of good wine. And, of course, a glittering square cut diamond ring to seal the deal. _

___But, alas, it did not happen the way he envisioned it. Murder had gotten in the way and by the time they got home late on Friday night, the only thing his hopefully-soon-to-be-fianc__é____ wanted to do was take a long, hot bubble bath - on her own (much to his disappointment) - and go to bed. Rick went on to sulk in his office, the small velvet box still carefully stored away in the drawer of his desk - it had been each day for the last three weeks. He aimlessly glanced around the room and caught sight of a picture of them. It was their first picture as a couple - one that had been taken in Rome. He had his arms tightly wrapped around her while pressing a hard kiss against her cheek and she was laughing brightly, her eyes crinkling in delight. _

_Picking____ up the frame, a small sentimental smile pulled at his mouth. She was his done and he was her one. He took the blue velvet box out of the drawer and looked at it for a while, rubbing his thumb over the soft material. _

___'Third time lucky, Ricky boy,' He glanced at the picture again. 'Third time lucky.' _

___

* * *

_

"What are you thinking, KC?" Rick asked softly, rhythymically running his fingers through her hair. They were lying on the couch (after dinner) in their familiar and comfortable position - Rick on his back with his head against the arm of the large couch while Kate draped half of her (now seven-and-a-half-month pregnant) body over his, her head on his chest.

She let out a content sigh.

"Just about us." She paused for a moment before lifting her head to look at him. "Actually about when you proposed."

His eyebrows came together in surprise.

"When I proposed? Why?"

She shrugged and returned to her original position.

"I don't know... I just always figured that you would kinda do something like you did tonight. Wine and dine _and _seduce me." Kate felt his chest rumble as he laughed. "Don't get me wrong, I loved the way you did it," she quickly added.

"Well it's now too late to say no, _Mrs_. Castle."

"Don't remind me," she mumbled.

"What was that?" His voice was laced with humour. He started to playfully poke at her sensitive and extremely ticklish sides causing Kate to immediately squirm and giggle.

"Nothing! I swear!" She laughed as he continued to pepper her with tickles.

He only stopped when she gave him a quick, sharp prod to his stomach eliciting a surprised groan. They grew quiet again after a few minutes of back-and-forth play and laughter.

"I actually wanted to do it this way, you know," Rick suddenly said. Kate lifted her head again to look at him; her expression one of confusion. "I wanted to wine and dine... and seduce you. I actually had a whole romantic evening planned - complete with some mushy speech and Barry White music." They both took a moment to shudder and cringe at the thought. Kate's expression sobered as a tentative smile graced her lips.

"Really? So you had the whole thing planned?"

"Mmm-hmm."

Kate's curiosity was now roused. "_So_... why did you do it the way that you did?"

Rick was silent for a few moments; a grin slowly splitting his ruggedly handsome face.

"The moment was... _us_."

* * *

XXXX

_8h00. On a Saturday morning. Rick Castle was up at 8am on a Saturday morning. It just didn't happen. The world had to be turned upside down.__ Kate observed her man-child lover from the top of the staircase to where he was singing along to a rock tune in the kitchen using a spatula as his mic. He was wearing his favourite Tasmanian Devil boxers, the 'Kiss the Cook'- apron... and a chef's hat. Kate only rolled her eyes and smiled as she continued to descend the stairs._

_"Good morning Jamie Oliver."_

_Rick looked up to see his leggy lover swagger towards him. She was clad in only his light blue dress shirt (which now had become her sleep attire; not that he minded) while her long curls were arranged in a messy bun with a few rogue strands escaping._

_"Good morning my lil' sex kitten." She only shot him an arched eyebrow. He ignored it of course, stepping towards her and pulling her to him. "If I'm Jamie Oliver, does that mean that you're Nigella Lawson?"_

_"Mmmm, I'm more of a Martha Stewart kinda girl," Kate responded with a shrug. _

_Rick scowled at this. "But she's old... and boring.__"_

_"She's America's greatest homemaker."_

_"She was in prison."_

_"Well then she's decidedly not boring."_

_"She looks terrible in orange."_

_"Who doesn't?"_

_"You." Kate rolled her eyes at the silly compliment and smiled._

_"C'mon, Ricky, cut the woman some slack - she can do just about anything around the house. It's impressive."_

_"Yeah - in a creepy Stepford Wives' way." He paused for a contemplative moment. __"I think __Bree van der Kamp is based on her."_

_Kate laughed heartily at this, giving her head a shake. "Desperate Housewives, Rick? Really?"_

_"It- I... only glance at it from time to time."_

_"Mmm-hmm, sure."_

_He briefly let go of her and held up his hands in defense. "Hey, it's an award-winning, critically acclaimed show... And I don't really have a choice with all the estrogen in the house."_

_"So says the man who reads the spoilers religously... So, do you also enjoy slumber parties and pillow fights?" Kate continued to tease while he only narrowed his eyes._

_He watched her for a moment before a sly smile tinged his lips upward. "Only with you - when you're all hot, bothered and very naked." His voice dropped a few octaves as he slowly dragged his eyes over her scarcely clad body. Leaning closer, he murmured."Tell me, Detective, are you wearing that sexy red thong I like so much?" _

_"Wouldn't you like to know," Kate muttered back, slightly biting her lower lip and quirking up a seductive eyebrow._

_"Oh you have no idea." He gave her a deep kiss and started to fiddle with some of the buttons at the bottom of her (his) shirt. Kate, however, broke from the kiss and swatted his hands away. _

_"Nice try, Writer Boy, but you're not getting any before I don't get any breakfast," she said taking a seat on one of the kitchen counter stools. _

_Rick sighed and muttered unhappily. "Cruel woman."_

_They were silent for a few minutes while Kate read the newspaper, her brow cutely crinkled, and Rick went about making their favourite breakfast - pancakes. His mind (again) drifted to the blue velvet box carefully stored away in the desk of his office, the woman sitting a few feet from him and the life-changing question he was burning to ask her. The only thing he needed was a moment - something big and intimate. _

_He was excited about asking Kate to become Mrs. Richard Castle... unlike the previous proposals._

_His proposal to Meredith was messy and rushed - he was a fumbling kid who had gotten his girlfriend pregnant. Proposing to her seemed the right thing to do, so he did. Unfortunately their marriage had also been messy and rushed. With Gina, however, he was a grown man in a relationship with a grown woman who wanted him to commit. And so he did - albeit reluctantly. The proposal was big - slightly over the top - clich__é__d and not all that unexpected. It felt like a business agreement - contrived and forced. Unfortunately their marriage also disintegrated into a pile of contrived and forced moments; the only passion they experienced was when they fought. _

_Kate? Well, Kate was different. She was the stars to his moon, the ying to his yang and the kiss to his hug. He was certain. Certain that he had the right girl this time. Certain that he would never love anyone else. Certain that he would grow old with her. _

_"Uh before I forget-" Kate started, turning over a page of the newspaper. "-I talked to your mother and she's coming over for dinner on Tuesday." _

_Rick turned towards her and raised his eyebrows. "You talk to my mother? I don't know whether I should be afraid or glad."_

_"You should only be afraid when you've done something wrong - which is quite often." She gave him a teasing smile while he only playfully narrowed his eyes and scowled at her._

_His expression, however, turned devilish. "I don't mind getting in trouble, Detective... I like handcuffs." _

_She only rolled her eyes and produced a lopsided grin. "Walked right into that one, didn't I?" _

_"Yeah, pretty much," he replied with a casual shrug before returning his attention back to the last pancake in the pan on the stove. "Anything else I need to know?" _

_"Yes. On Thursday we have Alexis' parent-teacher meeting at seven." She turned attention back to the newspaper. "Why don't you go get your diary so that I can write it down? We both know you have the memory of a fish."_

_Rick froze. He barely heard the last part. There was only one word that stuck in his mind - __'we'. One simple, tiny, but wonderfully significant word. They were a family - he knew it and she accepted it. And they all loved it. It was natural and organic. His eyes grew wide as the realization hit him - this was the moment. _Their_ moment. _

_"Rick? Did you hear me?" He looked up at her. _

_"Hmmm?"_

_"Get. Your. Diary... Now," she commanded. "You want me to get it for you?" She started to climb off the stool._

_"No!" He exclaimed a little too loudly, nervous excitement taking hold of him. Kate only cocked her head and frowned. "I mean, I- I'll get it." He gave her a sheepish smile and basically ran over to his office. _

_His hands were shaking as he opened the desk drawer and fumbled with the small box that he quickly pulled out. He hastily put it into the pocket of the 'Kiss the Cook'-apron. He was almost to the door of the office when he remembered his diary._

_"Here," he said handing the diary to her and walking back to the stove. _

_He was nervous and excited... and scared shitless. He went on to finish the pancakes - grinning the whole time - as Kate chatted away, blissfully unaware of the extra topping she was about to get on her pancakes._

_"I see you're seeing Gina next week." He put the plate in front of her while she still scrutinized his diary. "Is it about the book tour? Because you know that-" Her eyes drifted to the plate and the sentence was suddenly completely forgotten. The only thing her mind was registering was the plate of golden pancakes, the few strawberry slices around them and a small blue box in the middle on top of everything; open to reveal an elegant square cut diamond ring. Her breath hitched and her eyes grew wide in shock. Her eyes darted from the plate up to Rick, who was smiling nervously, and back to the glittering item._

_"Rick?" Her voice was soft. _

_He walked around the counter and took hold of her hands, lightly pulling her off the stool so that she stood in front of him. Without her power heels, Kate was small against his large frame. _

_They were silent for a few moments as Rick looked down at their intertwined hands, absent-mindedly rubbing his thumbs over the back of her hands._

_"I don't have... a long, world-shifting speech." He looked up at her; his voice quiet. "But... I love you, Kate, and I want this - us - for the rest of my life." He smiled at her and she returned one herself. "I- I want you to be dressed in one of my shirts each morning. I want to make babies with you, have movie nights with you, do chores with you, fight with you, have great make-up sex with you." Kate let out a laugh at this; her eyes starting to well up. "I want to go to parent-teacher meetings with you, take you on book tours with me, make a difference with you... I want all of this - all of you - for the rest of my life." He paused for a moment, his expression softening as he gently caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. "I'm your one and you're my done, KB." He let out a dramatic breath. "So, I guess what I'm saying or rather asking-" He bent down on one knee in front of her, lacing their hands once more. "-is whether you, Katherine Beckett, would do me the honour of becoming my wife... and permanent muse?" _

_One. Two. Three droplets fell onto their intertwined hands. Blissful tears streamed down her cheeks as a wide, all engulfing smile slowly enveloped her features. She nodded her head vigorously in addition to exclaiming a torrent of "Yesses." Rick, grinning like the love-struck idiot that he was, jumped to his feet and pulled her body to his before crushing his lips to hers in a searing kiss. He broke from the kiss and retrieved the ring. Grinning like happy fools, Rick glided the ring onto her shaking and elegant finger. _

_"I love you," he said quietly, wrapping his arms around her again._

_"I love you too." _

_"And the ring?"_

_"Yes, it's absolutely gorgeous," Kate said, beaming as she studied the foreign object on her ring finger. Rick kept his eyes on her._

_"It has nothing on you," he responded softly and she looked back up at him and smiled; her eyes sparkling. _

_She pulled him down for a deep, toe-curling kiss that had both their heads spinning. Soon the celebration escalated and moved to the couch - breakfast completely forgotten as clothing started to litter the living room floor._

_"You're wearing the red thong! I knew it!"_

_Kate let out a girlish laugh. "Shut up and kiss me already!" _

_Rick returned a wicked grin. "Whatever you want future-Mrs.-Castle... Whatever you want."_

_

* * *

_

"You didn't suspect anything?"

Kate shook her head as they removed the surplus pillows from their bed.

"Really? Nothing?" Rick asked again as they climb under the covers.

"Nope, not a thing," Kate replied, settling against his side with a book while he draped an arm around her shoulder. "That's probably why I said yes." Rick's brow furrowed in confusion as he looked down at her. "You ambushed me - so before I knew it, I said yes and there's was a ring on my finger." She flashed him a teasing smile.

"Haha, very funny Detective. If I remember correctly, _you _ambushed me and demanded that I take you right there and then on the couch."

Kate dropped her head, smiled broadly and blushed slightly. "Oh. Right. Yeah... Totally forgot about that part."

"Mmm-hmm," he responded with a knowing grin.

Suddenly Kate sat up, placing a hand on her large stomach.

"Lizzy, sweetie, settle down... Mommy has to get some sleep tonight and I can't do that if you keep making such a fuss."

"Guess who she gets that from," Rick muttered, also placing a hand on the baby bump.

"You," Kate replied.

"Nah-uh... That's all you, KC."

Kate laughed and gave him a quick kiss. They were quiet for a few moments, feeling the busy movements of their daughter.

"What are you thinking, RC?" Kate asked after a while. He waited a few contemplative moments before answering.

"Us... Our family. How everything just... worked out better than I could've ever expected." His gave her a soft smile and cupped her cheek. "I'm a lucky guy."

She placed her small hand over his. "Yes you are, Mr. Castle." Rick chuckled and gave her a hard, lingering kiss.

"KC?"

"Mmmm?"

"I'm glad you said yes."

Kate returned a brilliant smile.

"Me too, RC. Me too."

* * *

**A/N: There you go - nice and fluffy. It's fun to write something this light and sweet. I hope the proposal was satisfying; I just figured that it would be very natural and domestic.**

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes.**

**(Btw - for those who are not aware, Nathan Fillion was on 'Desperate Housewives' in season four where he played Katherine Mayfair's husband; hence my small nod to the show.)**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Thank you again for the reviews - I love writing this story and getting such positive feedback; it fuels me. **

**Okay, so I lied about the baby's birth, it will only happen in two chapters or so. This is just a fluffy little piece between Kate and Rick. I wanted to add more to it, but I'm afraid that it would end up being another 5000-10 000 words piece. **

**I apologize in advance for the cringe-worthy title. Didn't really know what to call this chapter and that's the best I could come up with. *Shrugs and glances awkwardly around the room***

**Anywho - enjoy! (Hope you do)**

**Disclaimer - Castle is not mine... which is utterly ridiculous. **

**P.S. can I get an 'amen!' on just how adorable, utterly irresistible and sexy Nathan Fillion is as Rick Castle. *Swoon* I'm completely smitten with the man.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 17 – My man(-child)**

"So tell me again why you dragged me out of bed at eight-thirty on a Sunday morning?" Kate asked, turning to look at her husband before taking the final bite of her rocky road ice-cream cone. They were strolling hand-in-hand in Central Park on a bright, sunny morning.

"A nice stroll in the park and ice-cream of course," Rick replied with a casual shrug and a smile. His ice-cream – like the overzealous child that he was – was already finished ten minutes ago.

He led her to a nearby bench to sit down, sensitive to how quickly she got tired.

"Uh-huh, _sure_… What do you want Castle?"

"Why do you always assume that I do something nice to get something out of you?... That kinda sounded dirty, didn't it?"

She ignored the last part. "Because I know you... So spit it out."

He hesitated for a moment. "Okay, listen the museum has this super cool dinosaur exhibition at nine-thirty and I really, _really_ want to go." _'And I need to keep you out of the house for a few hours,' _the thought vaguely rushed through his mind. He gave her his best lost-puppy expression. "_Please_."

Kate only shook her head and smiled. "Wow, I really _did _marry a twelve-year old."

"Oh come on, KC," he whined. "I deserve some sort of reward. For what else would I get up so early on a Sunday?"

"Some early morning nookie," she shot back after a beat.

Rick laughed heartily at this, his eyes creasing in amusement.

"Well, I didn't get any nookie this morning," Rick shot back, waggling his eyebrows.

"Uh, hello! Eight months pregnant here – a little impractical," Kate said arching her eyebrows.

"We could always work something out," Rick replied in a lowered tone, leaning in closer and flashing her a devilish grin. Instead of her usual eye roll or snarky comeback, Kate's expression dropped and her gaze immediately flicked to the ground. She started to absent-mindedly fiddle with her mother's ring around her neck with her free hand; a sign of vulnerability. Rick picked up on it, but hesitated to push her. After a few seconds passed by, she spoke.

"I- I kinda feel… _unattractive_ right now," she mumbled softly, not meeting his gaze.

"Unattractive!" Rick exclaimed in genuine shock. To him, she has never been more beautiful than now. He looked at her in surprise, his brow furrowed. "Honey, what are you talking about?" She sighed heavily before looking up at him.

"Rick, look at me." She gestured to herself. "Swollen feet, swollen hands... swollen _everything_! I'm _huge_… and well...," she trailed off.

When he spoke, his voice was soft and reassuring. "Sweetie, you're not fat. You're-"

"Yeah, I know, I know… I'm pregnant," Kate interrupted him with a sigh.

"And very, _very_ beautiful," he added quietly, leaning in and giving her a peck on the lips. "You know you're my girl, right?" She nodded, her eyes still not meeting his. "My very sexy, stunning, gorgeous, heavenly, _flexible-_."

She shook her head as a chuckle escaped her lips. "Okay, Casanova, I get it."

"Do you believe me?" He lifted her chin, serious cobalt blues meeting tentative emerald greens.

Kate watched him for a few contemplative moments before answering. "Yes... yeah, I believe you." Her eyes, however, again broke away from his. "It's just…" She bit her lower lip, suddenly feeling emotional; pregnancy hormones wrecking havoc on her state of mind. "I- I…can't do anything..." she trailed off, wiping angrily at her eyes still fixed on her shoes. "Damn it!"

His face relaxed as a tender smile tugged at his mouth.

"Katie-" He lifted her chin again, gently grasping it and holding her gaze. "-listen to me. You're allowed to feel a little unsettled, sweetheart. Your whole identity has been changing – along with your body. You're a cop… you're used to be out in field, in the thick of things or at least at the precinct doing your job… and worrying your husband." He smiled at her and she returned a faint one herself. "_Now_, you're going to be at home for a while… and, well, you feel-"

"Useless," she finished for him with an unhappy sigh.

"I was going to say overwhelmed."

"That too."

"Well, don't worry, I'll be there. I'll help you, I'll satisfy your every whim-" He only got an eye roll in reply. "-and I'll entertain you."

"More like drive me up the wall."

"Would you expect any less of me." He grinned at her again.

She smiled and shrugged. "No, I guess not."

He let go of her hand and draped his arm over her shoulder, pulling her closer to him and pressing a kiss on top of her head. They sat like this for a while, quietly observing the activities and people around them - couples walking hand-in-hand, a few brawny young men playing football, a little girl yelping in delight as her father swung her around in the air. After a silent minute or two, Rick spoke again in an effort to lift her hormonally-dampened spirits.

"FYI... I love seeing you pregnant. In fact I intend to get you pregnant about three or four times more, Mrs. Castle." Kate whipped her head up to look at him. He smiled broadly at her, obviously pleased by her stunned reaction.

"W-w-what?" She stuttered and let out a nervous laugh. "Uh-huh, Writer Boy. Not happening."

His face fell slightly. "What? Why not? You don't want any more babies with me, KC?"

"Not- not three or four more! I don't want to be pregnant for the rest of my life! I haven't even given birth to this one." She placed a hand on her protruding baby bump.

"Okay, okay. Another two then."

"One."

He pouted at this.

"One more _or..._ you get snipped. That's my final offer. Your pick."

"Fine... one more," he breathed, pouting once again. Kate tried to suppress a smile as she wrapped her arm around Rick's lower back, leaning further into his side.

After a few quiet moments, she spoke again. "Tell you what... if you agree to buy me another ice-cream, we can go the museum."

Rick eyes lit up with childlike enthusiasm. "Really?" She smiled and nodded. "Okay, deal!" He hastily got up from his seat and held out his hands toward her. "C'mon, KC, I don't wanna miss the t-rex." Kate laughed as he pulled her up.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "You're such a man-child."

"I'm_ y__our_ man-child."

She smiled before leaning up and pressing a sweet kiss on his lips. "And I woulnd't have it any other way."

He gave her another kiss, while his phone chimed with a text message - the second one that morning from his firstborn.

_'Dad, I hope you have a plan, cause we still have a lot to do. Call me when you're in the clear. Over and out, Little Bird.'_

_

* * *

_

**A/N: I wanted to do write a long chapter, but I've instead decided to split this theme into two chapters. I just felt that the interaction between the two here could stand on its own. So, you will only find out in the next chapter what Alexis is going on about. **

**Review please! **

**I apologize if there are any spelling and grammar mistakes.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Yeah, yeah, I know - I'm terrible at updating. And it's not just my fanfics. My thesis is also suffering - not updated in like two months. *Sigh deeply* Anyway, this is a continuation of the last chapter and includes some of our other fave characters and lots of fluff. And it's long.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer - No, you are mistaken, I do not own 'Caslte'. Awesome Americans do.**

**Btw - how absolutely adorable was sad Castle in 'The Last Nail'? He was _sooo_ cute being all emotional and teary-eyed. Why didn't Beckett just kiss his head and cradle him or something? *Shakes head.* **

**Yes, I am in love with Nathan Fillion. Me and I'm sure millions of others. No, I'm not a stalker... Yet. **

**;-)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 18 - Bearing Gifts**

"Yeah, ok sweetie… Mmm-hmm, we'll be heading back soon…"

Kate spotted her husband as she emerged from the ladies' bathroom for the third time in the space of an hour. He was talking to someone on his iPhone _again_ and she, ever-the-detective, was starting to get suspicious. Kate narrowed her eyes and frowned as she slowly walked (or rather waddled) over to Rick who had his back turned to her; completely oblivious to her presence. When she got in an ear-shot distance, she heard him say:

"Just make sure that everything is ready-" Rick abruptly stopped mid-sentence when he turned around and came face-to-face with his wife who was arching a curious eyebrow at him.

"Uhhh," he stammered as he eyed her anxiously. "Ok Paula, yeah that's fine. Send it over. 'K bye." He hastily ended the call, ignoring the protesting voice at the other end of the line.

Kate tilted her head, narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms.

"Hey, you ready to go?" Rick asked as innocently as possible.

It didn't fool her.

"What was that about?" She asked, still with her arms crossed.

"Hmmm?" He was slightly nervous now. Kate, even an eight-months-pregnant Kate who was currently a head-and-a-half shorter than him without her power heels, was still extremely intimidating. _Extremely_.

"What were you talking about with Paula? Your next manuscript isn't due in like six months."

"Oh. Yeah. Uh, she just wanted to..." _'Shit, don't blow it Rick,' _he thought, his Adam's apple bobbing anxiously.

Kate arched one of her perfectly sculpted eyebrows. "Well?"

"Uh, it was just about a- a few book signings." He smiled, relieved and slightly impressed with himself that he didn't break under his wife's intense interrogation-room stare. Which was scary, really scary. "You know, promotional stuff for the movie." He flashed Kate his boyish grin that often melted her resolve. "So are you ready to go home, Mrs. Castle?" He draped an arm around her shoulders as they started to make their way out of the Museum of Natural History.

Kate watched her husband for a few moments, not entirely convinced by his answer. But, deciding that she wanted to go home and clean out their fridge, she opted to end her interrogation. For now.

"Yeah, I wanna go home and have you make me something delicious and fattening… I, we-" She placed a hand on her stomach. "-are starving." He chuckled, pulling her closer and placing his other hand on her large stomach as they walked leisurely down the sidewalk.

"Daddy to the rescue then, huh Sweet Pea?"

"She's rolling her eyes at you now, you know that right?" Kate said with an amused grin.

"She would never do that to me," he brushed off her comment before turning his attention back to the baby bump. "We're going to make a mean team. Isn't that right, Lizzy?"

"You're going to expose her to laser tag and _Star Wars_, aren't you?"

"Well, you exposed Alexis to eye-rolls and _Gone with the Wind_ and…" He shuddered. "Barbra Streisand."

"Hey, that wasn't just me. Your mom had a hand in that... From very early on, I might add." She grinned at him and his face fell slightly.

He narrowed his eyes. "What are you implying?"

"Let's just say that Alexis has 'Papa can you hear me?' on her iPod and she knows the lyrics by heart... And she has all, and I mean all, the movies. _Funny Girl, What's up Doc? On a clear day you can see forever_-"

He grimaced as if in physical pain. "Please don't say _Yentl_."

"-_Yentl, A star is-"_

_"_Please stop. I've heard enough!" He placed his hands over his ears. "You mean to tell me that my eldest has been exposed to _that_ from an early age?"

Kate shrugged and nodded solemnly, continuing their silly verbal sparring game. "Yes, Castle, I'm afraid so."

"This is indeed a dark day," he mumbled. Suddenly he channeled a dramatic diva… or bad soap opera actor. "_Why_? Why Alexis, Kate? She's just a child. It's- it's just so... unfair."

She laughed at his silliness. "Shut up. I happen to love Babs. Do I seem damaged by her talents?" A slow grin spread across his face. "On second thought, don't answer that," Kate quickly said, placing a hand over his mouth. Rick removed her hand, still grinning.

"If you wanted me to shut up Mrs. Castle, you could've just kissed me." He shrugged and waggled his eyebrows.

Kate watched him for a few seconds. "Fine." She stood up and placed a chaste kiss on his lips before retreating mere sentimetres. "Shut." She pressed her lips to his again. "Up."

He smiled broadly. "What? No tongue?"

She slapped him playfully on the chest and chuckled.

"No nothing until you get me home and get me and lil' Castle-" She patted her baby bump. "-some food!"

"Aye, aye-" He grinned at her and winked. "-Mama Bear."

* * *

xxx

_'Big Eagle and Mama Hen have landed. I repeat we have landed. Be ready.' _Rick smiled as he covertly sent the text message, careful not to alert Kate to his actions. They had just entered the building, hand-in-hand, and were walking towards the elevator. When they got in, Rick's phone chimed for the second time in ten minutes. His wife again grew suspicious.

_'Big Eagle and Mama Hen? Seriously Dad, you're losing your touch. Anyway, we're ready. Little Bird.'_

A chuckle escaped his lips before he could help it. Kate watched him closely and narrowed her eyes.

"Something you want to share with the class, Castle?"

His head snapped up and he stared at her for a few moments.

"Uh, no." He let out a nervous laugh. "Just a dirty joke from Esposito." The elevator dinged and the doors opened.

Kate rolled her eyes and shook her head as they stepped out of the elevator and started to walk down the hallway. He took her small, slender hand in his and smiled broadly for no apparent reason, Kate had noticed. They reached the door of the loft and Rick went about unlocking it.

"You know what I'm in the mood for?"

"Mmmm?" Rick replied absent-mindedly as he opened the door. He gestured for her to walk in, suddenly grinning again.

She stepped into the loft, her head still turned towards him. "I was thinking a movie and piz-" Before Kate could finish she was met by a loud chorus of "Surprise!"

She snapped her head around and gasped. And then let out a surprised laugh. There were balloons and banners and a lot of friendly faces - all female of course since this was a baby shower. She immediately spotted two familiar redheads at the front of the small crowd. A bright smile engulfed her features.

"Lex! Martha!" The young woman was grinning from ear-to-ear, the very likeness of her father, as she bounced over towards Kate. Martha was smiling broadly as she elegantly made her way to her daughter-in-law whom she came to adore as a daughter. No one could ever fill the void Johanna Beckett's death left, but in Martha Rogers, Kate found an unlikely mother figure. Someone who she relied on. Respected. Loved. Yes, Martha Rogers was her mother now, just as Alexis Castle was her daughter. Kate had fallen in love with the two women just as much as she had fallen in love with Rick. They, with Rick and Baby Castle, were her family. And she was theirs. She belonged with them and they belonged with her.

"Hey Kate!," Alexis greeted as she hugged the dark-haired woman.

"Hello Darling," Martha greeted as she stepped in for an embrace once Alexis released Kate. "I hope Richard has been treating you and my grandchild well," she added, glancing at her son and putting a hand tenderly on Kate's baby bump.

"What- how- what are you all doing here?" Kate asked, not able to rid herself of the smile that had encased her lips.

"What does it look like, girl?" Lanie spoke, stepping out from behind Karpowski. "We're all here for a baby shower. So get your pregnant booty upstairs, 'cause there are some diapers and fairy wings that have your name on it." The ME smirked at her best friend who seemed a little flustered.

"Uh... okay."

Rick came up beside her. She had momentarily forgotten that he was still there. "Well ladies, I'll take this as my cue to leave. Enjoy yourselves... and call me if my daughter decides to come early." He pressed a kiss against Kate's cheek and disappeared out the door before she could respond. A few moments later she was being hauled up the stairs by her diminutive and feisty friend.

Five minutes later, Alexis' phone vibrated and chimed with a new text message.

_'Good job Little Bird, I'm proud of you. We make a good team, don't we? Anyway, enjoy the party and call me if anything happens in relation to Baby Bird. Or anything for that matter. I'll be at the Haunt with the boys. Love you with jelly tots on top, Big Eagle. ;-)'_

_

* * *

_

xxx

The Old Haunt was a hub of activity as Rick Castle, owner and not-so-regular customer, walked in. He heard happy laughter, loud chatter and the jovial chimes of the piano as he made his way to the '12th'.

"Hey, it's Papa Castle!" Montgomery greeted to loud cheers from the other men as Rick approached the three men sitting at 'their' booth.

"Hey fellas," Rick greeted, taking off his coat and sliding in next to the Captain. He turned to a waiter close to him. "Mike! A round of scotch here for everyone." He turned his attention back to the men. "How's it hanging?"

"Good, man, good," Ryan replied with a smile before taking a sip of his beer. "And you? How's Beckett?"

"Yeah, how's your baby mama?" Esposito chipped in with a wide grin.

"Stubborn, tired, a little pissed about not being able to work and did I mention stubborn?" Rick replied with a wry smile.

The other men chuckled in response.

"Well, why am I not surprised?" Montgomery commented with a smile.

"Yep, that pretty much sounds like her," Esposito added.

"So, did it work? Was she surprised?" Ryan asked, referring to the baby shower.

"Yeah, she was." Rick smiled smugly before his expression sobered up. "Luckily not enough for her water break, though."

* * *

xxx

_Meanwhile back at the loft..._

"Oh this is adorable!" Kate exclaimed for about the tenth time to a chorus of "aawwwweess" as she held up a cute pair of tiny pink slippers and a white onesie that had 'Mommy & Daddy's Little Trouble Maker' written across the front. She was seated in front of the small group of friends which included Martha, Alexis, Lanie, Karpowski and a few other female friends she had made over the years.

"So, Kate, do you think Rick's going to help you change nappies?" Susan, Kate's yoga instructor and friend of the last five years, asked with a broad smile.

Kate let out a chuckle and glanced at her step-daughter. "Definitely. Besides, he raised Alexis, so I'm sure he knows how to change a nappy."

"I wouldn't be so sure, Kiddo. The few times I saw him change Alexis, it was a disaster," Martha chipped in, returning to her seat with a refilled glass of punch; the one with the alcohol in it. "This one time when she was about a year old-" She turned her attention to the rest of the women. "-the prospect of changing a dirty nappy almost had him in tears. So what does Richard decide to do? You've guessed it, he opts for a hosepipe. Mind you it _was_ the first time he had to take care of her on his own." The women laughed heartily at this.

Alexis' eyes grew wide. "Grams, you're not serious!"

"Oh don't worry, Darling. Luckily, I was around that time and stopped him before he traumatized you." She turned her attention back to Kate.

"I'll shoot him if he tries to pull a stunt like that," Kate said, shaking her head with a smile.

"If he's not willing to help you, Kate, dear, just tell me. I'll set him straight," Martha said with a wink and the women smiled at each other.

"Alright, this one is from... Madison," Lanie said, handing Kate another bag. "There's a card in there too."

Kate pulled out the card and flipped it open.

_'See? I told you. You wanted to have Castle babies and now here you are, Becks.'_ Kate laughed heartily at this. _'Congratulations, I know you're going to be a great mom. Just like Johanna.' _She smiled sadly reading the last line and felt her eyes becoming moist. Everyone she wanted to be involved in this journey was there, except the one person that she needed there the most - her mother. Johanna Beckett would have been over the moon and would have fussed and hovered and hurried her grandchild along. She briefly closed her eyes as she toyed with the ring around her neck before going back to reading the note. _'I'm sorry I couldn't be there today, but we'll catch up soon. Lots of love, Maddy.' _

She opened the bag and pulled out another item of miniature clothing to a fresh chorus of "awweesss".

* * *

xxx

_The Haunt... a few hours and quite few drinks later._

Their rambunctious laughter reverberated throughout the confines of the booth, melting with all the other loud noises of The Haunt. An array of glasses and bottles adorned the table, along with a pack of cards and cashew nuts. Currently the men were swapping horror boys-meet-dad and dad-meets-boys stories.

"Cap, you didn't really do that, did you?" Ryan asked, a residual chuckle escaping his throat.

"Ryan, I most certainly did. That little sucker was scared shitless. It took him a year to go from calling me Captain Montgomery to addressing me as _Mister_ Montgomery," Roy replied with an amused grin and a twinkle in his eyes.

Rick grinned wildly as he imagined a stern-looking Roy Montgomery slowly cleaning his shotgun while his teenage daughter's teenage boyfriend watched on, gulping nervously. "Classic... Did it work?"

"No, he's my son-in-law now," Roy deadpanned and the others burst out laughing.

Rick smiled and grew thoughtful. "You know I never got to make Alexis' boyfriends squirm. I mean _really_ squirm. I wanted to do the whole severed head and blood-soaked maniac-routine with one of her dates once, but she stopped me before I could... Such a killjoy." He sighed, shook his head and took a sip from his now watery whiskey.

"Don't worry Castle, you'll get another shot at it again with Elizabeth," Montgomery smirked.

Rick groaned. "Well if she looks anything like her mother and inherits my natural charm, I'm gonna have my hands full."

"Don't worry, bro. She has uncles who will help you out," Ryan said, clinking his beer bottle with Castle's glass.

"And a mother who owns a gun and handcuffs," Montgomery added, also clinking his glass with Rick's.

"And an aunt who will help you get rid of the body and evidence if anything _unfortunate_ happens to a frisky young teenage boy," Esposito finished doing what the other two did.

"Good to know, thanks." Rick grinned and raised his glass. "I would like to take this opportunity and make a toast to my unborn daughter. So gentleman, please raise your glasses to... Elizabeth Castle!"

"Elizabeth Castle!" The others echoed his sentiments and raised their glasses.

"To the little heartbreaker who's gonna give her ol' man a real hard time!" Roy quipped with a broad grin.

"Hear! Hear!" Esposito and Ryan added, laughing.

Rick groaned and dropped his head.

He knew that if Elizabeth Castle looked anything like her mother, that they were going to have their hands full. Right then and there, Rick decided first thing tomorrow that he was going to buy a shotgun.

As that thought crossed his mind, he lifted his hand and ordered another round of drinks.

He needed it.

* * *

xxx

_The loft... an hour after the baby shower._

The three (and a three quarter) Castle women were bundled together on the large leather couch with Martha in the middle and Alexis and Kate on either side of the matriarch. The two younger women were sipping carefully from their cups of hot chocolate while the older woman periodically took a sip from her glass of red wine. The loft was still recovering from the baby shower as balloons still floated around and banners still hung from the walls. Currently the three women's attention were focused on a photo album. More specifically, Richard Rogers' photo album.

"Wow, I can't believe Dad was blonde when he was little!" Alexis exclaimed as she held up a yellowing photo of her father when he was toddler.

"Aww, he was so adorable, Martha," Kate commented with a broad smile before her expression fell slightly. "Just don't tell him I said that."

The older woman grinned and patted Kate's hand. "Your secret is safe with me, Dear."

"How old was he here, Grams?" Martha took the photo from her granddaughter and carefully perused it.

"Oh he was just a toddler. Maybe about two." Her face softened as a sentimental smile tugged her mouth upwards. "He was such a good boy. Lively, mind you, but good." Her expression, however, sobered and she sighed. "_But_, before I knew it he was all grown up and getting into all sorts of trouble."

Kate chuckled softly as she continued to page through the album. "Mmmm, I can only imagine all the trouble he got in to."

"He _still_ gets into trouble," Alexis pointed out with a laugh. The other two women nodded and smiled in acknowledgement.

They grew quiet for a few moments as they continued to slowly page through the album before the young redhead spoke. "Kate?"

"Mmmm?"

"What type of kid were you?"

Kate smiled and sat back. "Uhmmm, well I was pretty good when I was young. My mom used to say that I was 'Daddy's little girl' and that I had my dad wrapped around my little finger."

"Sounds familiar," Martha commented, giving her granddaughter a sideways glance. The two redheads smiled at each other.

"But then the hormonal teenager years started and well, I kinda entered a wild-child phase much to my parents dismay."

Alexis' eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really?"

Kate grinned and nodded slowly. "Oh yeah. I wasn't you, Lex. I was rebellious and drove my parents, especially my dad, nuts. My mom was a little more laid-back. She understood that it was just a phase."

"What did you do?" Alexis asked.

Kate diverted her gaze to her hands in her lap and smiled, slightly biting her lip. "Let's just say that by the time I turned eighteen, my dad owned about three shotguns," she answered, looking back up. Alexis laughed and shook her head.

"Well, Darling, I think you better get yourself armed then," Martha commented with an amused smirk. Kate only frowned in confusion.

"Between you and Richard's genes, this little one-" She placed a hand on Kate's stomach. "-is likely to be a little trouble maker."

"And a real heartbreaker," Alexis added with a broad smile.

Kate laughed nervously. "Uh, maybe- maybe not. I mean look at Lex, she was practically raised by a man-child and look how well she turned out. You have none of your father _or _mother's wild-child tendencies."

Alexis shrugged and fought to keep an amused smile off her lips. "True, but maybe Lizzy is going to be Dad's punishment for his many, _many_ sins."

Kate's face dropped. "Please don't say that."

"Oh don't worry, Kiddo," Martha said, wrapping an arm around the younger woman's shoulder. "We'll be here to help you out." Kate returned a warm smile and nodded. "Who knows, maybe she'll take after her good old Grams."

Kate groaned and dropped her head.

* * *

xxx

The door clicked open and a slightly intoxicated mystery writer stumbled in before shutting the large door as softly as possible. He almost tripped over his own feet as he gingerly walked into his home. He attempted to check his watch, trying very hard not to fall over in the process and coming to the conclusion that it wasn't very late. The light in the kitchen and TV were still on, indicating that there was still life.

"Hey Dad." Rick jumped as his daughter's voice startled him.

"Shit! Alexis... you _*hic*_ scared me!" He exclaimed, slurring slightly. His eldest sat up from her spot on the couch and raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"Did you have fun?"

"Uh, yeaaahh. _*hic*_ Lots and lots _*hic*_ of fun." He gave her a sheepish grin while swaying slightly.

Alexis bit the inside of her cheek in an attempt not to laugh. "Mmm-hmm, I can see that."

"How was _*hic*_ the baby _*hic*_ shower?"

Alexis pursed her lips. "Great, it was also a lot of fun."

He nodded slowly and blinked his eyes as he looked around the living room. "Where's _*hic*_ Grams?"

"She went out with some of her thespian friends." He nodded and smiled.

"And Kate?"

"I think she went to bed."

"'Kay, I think _*hic*_ Imma do that _*hic*_ too." He turned and staggered towards the stairs. "Night _*hic*_ Pumpkin."

Alexis shook her head and chuckled. "Okay, Dad. Night."

XXX

He slowly and carefully walked up the stairs. Once he reached the hallway, he kept his body close to the wall.

"_Ka-tie, Ka-tie,_" Rick sing-songed quietly as he opened their bedroom door. Kate was sitting on top of their bed, legs crossed, unpacking all the gifts from the baby shower.

Rick grinned widely when he saw his beautiful wife on the bed in comfortable shorts and one of his dress shirts, her hair pulled back into a casual pontytail. Kate looked up and raised her eyebrows in amusement when she saw him staggering unsteadily in the doorway.

"Hi," she greeted, biting her lower lip in an effort not to laugh at her obviously intoxicated husband.

He smiled sheepishly at her as he walked over a little wobbly. "Heeyyy Katie." He fell onto the bed next to her and propped himself up onto his forearms and looked up at her; his blue eyes a little duller than usual.

She let out a laugh. "Katie, huh?"

"Mmm-hmm... my _beeaauutiffuul_ Katie," he slurred pushing himself up towards her.

"Oh really? Sounds like someone had fun." She giggled when he nuzzled her neck.

"Mmmm... I sure did." He placed a kiss on her cheek before plopping down onto the bed, lying on his back.

"A little too much fun it seems." Kate looked down at him and grinned. "You know you're going to have a hangover tomorrow, right?"

His eyes were closed and his speech slurry. "Nah-uh," he mumbled, turning on his side and draping an arm loosely over her lap.

Kate lifted her hands. "O-kay, just don't expect any sympathy from me when you wake up with one hellavu headache."

"Mmmm" Was his only reply. After a few moments he stirred and turned look at what she was doing.

"What's all this?"

"Gifts from the baby shower. Our little girl got a lot of great presents. Didn't you, Lizzy?" Kate patted her baby bump.

Rick had a vacant expression as he perused the items on the bed; intoxication and weariness clouding his usually sharp and attentive mind. "Huh, that's nice." He laid back down, draped an arm around his wife and closed his eyes before mumbling. "Remind me to buy a shotgun tomorrow."

She looked down at him, her brow furrowing in sudden confusion. "What?" But before she could get an answer, her husband was already snoring. She shook her head, rolled her eyes and smiled sardonically.

"Lizzy, your daddy can be very silly." A wide grin split her lips as she leaned down to place a soft kiss on top of his head and affectionately run a hand through his hair. "But, we love him for it."

* * *

**A/N: Well, I hope that was enjoyable. ****I wanted to do something with the other characters in it and thought why not do a baby shower-type thing and well, it was my sister-in-law's baby shower about two weeks ago, so that also inspired me. **

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**Next chapter - baby Lizzy's arrival!**

**I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes; I will correct them if I spot any.**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Here it is people - the long awaited arrival of Elizabeth Johanna Castle. Now, I've recently become an aunt, so I've based some of this on that. But just so we're clear I don't know a whole lot of the whole birth process, so I've rather focused this on the characters and their interaction. I intended this to be funny and sweet and I hope it is.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer - didn't own it yesterday and don't own it now. I do, however, own Elizabeth Johanna Castle. ;-)**

**P.S. - 'Setup' was great, but seriously I really want to kill that guy who interrupted Rick and Kate. Seriously! And I'm kinda freaking out after seeing the sneak peeks for 'Countdown'.**

**Anyway, my obsession with 'Castle' is bordering on the unhealthy side. No, I'm dead serious. Who else is unhealthily obsessed with anything related to 'Castle' at the moment?**

**(Updated version. Okay, I totally feel like a bonehead *slaps forehead*. It's not two aunts, it's one aunt and a sister. Arggh!) **

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 19 – The Arrival**

"No, no, no!" Rick called out in frustration, lost in the world of the characters on the screen.

He was the epitome of an overgrown twelve-year old boy complete with Superman boxers, adorably ruffled bed-hair and a half-eaten bowl of Cheerios on bed stand next to him. His brow was furrowed in concentration and his tongue on occasion peeked out of the confines of his mouth as his two thumbs worked furiously. _Halo_ was proving to be a formidable challenge for the Master of the Macabre.

Kate sighed and shot a sideways glance at her husband as she continued to page through a magazine; her jaw set in annoyance. It was just past nine on a Saturday morning and he was playing video games, much to her irritation. Kate had been on bed rest for the past week – on doctor's orders – and was by now ready to go into labor at any minute. Obviously, her incorrigible, overprotective, man-child husband insisted that he do everything in their room to where she was confined to for the rest of her pregnancy. This 'everything' also included playing marathon rounds of _Halo_, _Drake's Fortune_, _Medal of Honor_ and _Resident Evil_. Rick claimed that Alice reminded him of Kate – strong, feisty and _hot_.

His claim was met by a dramatic eye-roll.

"Shouldn't you be writing?" Kate asked, her attention back to the pages of the magazine.

"Mmmm," was his only response, his tongue peeking out of the corner of his mouth and his brow knitted together. Kate looked at him and failed to suppress a broad grin from overtaking her features; her annoyance dissipating in an instant. He turned to look at her momentarily and caught her expression, his brow furrowing even more.

"What?"

She bit her lower lip and smiled at him, simultaneously raising her nine-month pregnant body up towards him. "Nothing… You're just adorable." He returned a smile before Kate pressed her lips to his in a sweet, lingering kiss. She broke from the kiss and flashed him a sultry grin, her face inches from his. His eyes kept darting from her enticing mouth to her emerald green eyes, the remote control in his hands momentarily forgotten.

After a moment she spoke, amused at how quickly she could distract her husband. "Uh, Honey, I think they're about to kill you."

"Huh?" He turned his hazy eyes to the screen and quickly snapped into action. "Oh crap!" She laughed and moved to get off the bed.

"I'm going to take a shower."

"Mmmm," came his distracted reply. "No, no, no!"

_About three minutes later…_

The bathroom door swung open, revealing a relatively calm, but in labor Kate.

"Rick."

His attention was still glued to the screen. "Yeah?"

"My water just broke," she replied evenly. Rick snapped his head in her direction and his eyes grew wide. He leapt up and stumbled off the bed, falling over and crashing into the nearby lounge chair.

"Ow! Shit!" He absent-mindedly rubbed his injured shin. "Uh, okay, okay. Nobody panic! Just- just stay calm," he stammered, spinning around like a headless chicken. "Crap, uhmm, where are my pants? Dammit!"

* * *

XXX

"You okay?" He glanced at her for the third time in the space of fifteen seconds, his brow furrowed and his eyes wide with concern.

"For the millionth time, yes I am fine," Kate replied through gritted teeth as they hurriedly weaved through mid-morning traffic. "You just concentrate on the road."

"Remember to-"

"I swear, Rick, if you are going to tell me to breathe one more time, there's going to be a murder!" She snapped.

"Okay, okay… Just _breathe_."

If looks could kill, Richard Castle would be a dead man.

* * *

XXX

_An few hours later… The waiting room of the Mount Sinai's maternity ward._

The waiting room was cluttered with six impatient and excited figures: one grandfather, one grandmother, one sister, an aunt and two uncles. The only person missing from the group was the Captain who had _ordered_ Ryan and Esposito to keep him updated on Baby Castle.

"I bet you fifty bucks she threatens to kill him," Javier Esposito said to his partner with a broad grin.

"Too late, she already has. I heard her all the way down the hall," Lanie quipped with a smirk of her own.

"Bro, it's Beckett. Of course she's threatened him already," Ryan added with a wide smile.

The smile dropped from Esposito's face and his brow knitted together as he thought of another wager they could make. Apparently waiting for a baby to arrive wasn't the most exciting thing to do. He was bored out of his head. But he wasn't going to miss the arrival of Baby Castle for anything, so he suggested they do what they did best: bet on the Rick and Kate.

"I'm surprised Katie doesn't have her gun with her," Jim Beckett commented and everybody laughed, knowing full well that Kate, if she could, would be carrying her gun.

A wide smile overtook Javier's features as he turned to Lanie. "I bet you twenty he records everything."

"Count me in, bro!" Ryan said, quickly pulling his wallet.

"Yeah, that sounds like something Dad would try," Alexis said with a knowing grin and an eye-roll.

"And _I_ bet you she threatens him with grievous bodily harm before he gets the chance to," Lanie shot back, quirking up an eyebrow.

Martha held out a twenty dollar bill to Lanie and smiled broadly. "I'm with you on that, Darling. Gun or no gun, my son is too scared of his wife to even try that."

After a few moments, everyone turned to Jim. "Well, Mr. B? You in?" Esposito asked, waving the few notes in his hand around.

Jim Beckett considered the offer for a moment, narrowing his eyes. "I bet you fifty he tries _and_ loses a limb in the process."

XXX

_Meanwhile…_

"Smile sweetheart, you're doing great." Rick held up his iPhone, recording his panting and grunting wife while she all but broke his free hand in a death grip. She turned to look at him, hair plastered to her clammy forehead and her face flushed.

When she spoke, her tone was low and menacing. "Richard Castle, get that _thing_ out of my face."

"But-"

"Castle, I swear if you don't stop recording now, I'm gonna shove that phone so high up your ass you'll cough it up!"

He immediately complied and said a silent goodbye to his hand in her death grip. '_Writing with one hand shouldn't be so bad,' _the thought crossed his mind.

Dr. Anna Jones lifted her head over the blue sheet to look up at the dark-haired detective. When she spoke, her voice was firm and reassuring. "Alright Kate, it's now or never… I'm going to need you to push as hard as you can, okay? Just follow my instructions." Kate pursed her lips and only nodded in reply. She tightened her grip on her husband's hand, completely unaware of how he winced in pain. She didn't notice and he didn't care – they were about to meet their daughter. And that was all that mattered.

_Ten minutes later… _

"Aaaaarrggghhhhhh!"

"You're doing fantastic, Kate! C'mon, I can see her head!"

Rick pressed a kiss against his wife's clammy temple. "Honey, you're doing great." He was by now seated on the bed with her, his body wrapped around hers in an effort to lend both moral and physical support. She was now crushing both his hands in death grips.

"Okay, Kate, stop and take a breath for me. We're almost there," Dr. Jones calmly instructed.

Her face was red and she was panting, perspiration making her skin slick. "Aaaahhhhh!" She threw her head back against his shoulder in pain. After a moment she swung her head around to face her husband, her expression contorting in pain and her voice full of venom.

"I _hate_ you!"

Rick looked at her in surprise, his brow furrowing in confusion. "Hate me? Why?"

"You and your stupid penis got me pregnant you bastard!" If it was any other situation, Rick would have laughed, but given the context and his wife's state of mind he only flashed her a sheepish smile. But then in typical Rick Castle fashion, he shot back:

"I and my stupid penis apologize, Sweetheart." If looks could kill, Richard Castle would be dead. Again.

Dr. Anna Jones couldn't help but smile in amusement at the exchange.

"Alright Kate, only a few more pushes. C'mon, I know you can do it!"

"I'm right here, Katie. I'm right here."

"I _hate_ your penis and your stupid ssspppeeerrmmmm!" She reiterated through clenched teeth. "Gaaawwwwwwdddd!"

_'We're never having sex again, are we?' _the thought absent-mindedly rushed through his mind, his crushed hands by now numb with pain.

"The head is out, alright c'mon one more push. One more big push. You can do, Kate."

Kate was shaking her head vehemently, tears of pain and exhaustion and emotion streaming down her face. "No, no, I- I can't."

He planted a tender kiss in her hair. "You can and you will," Rick whispered into her ear as she continued to shake her head. "I love you. You can do this. You can do anything."

His soft assurance seemed to elicit one final surge of energy from her and taking a deep breath, Kate put her body through one final, excruciating push to bring their daughter into the world.

XXX

_Fifteen minutes later... _

Rick Castle was walking on air, utterly and wholly smitten. Completely, punch-drunk, head-over-heels in love with the tiny, pink (or rather reddish) bundle that came screaming into the world. It was love at first sight for them both. And he was sure that it would be the case for everyone who laid eyes on Elizabeth Johanna Castle.

He was grinning like an idiot as he turned the corner, blissfully unaware of anything outside the bubble that had enveloped him. He was a puddle of happy mush. If someone asked him to sign over his fortune right at that moment, he would. He would even hug it out with the world's worst dictator, he was so happy.

"Who's got two thumbs and a new baby girl?" He greeted with a large smile as he approached the small group in the waiting area. "This guy!" He pointed his thumbs to himself and laughed, his cobalt blue eyes shining brightly. The close family of loved ones leapt up and burst out into enthusiastic 'congratulations' and joyous 'we're so happy's', tight hugs and teary kisses.

For the following twenty minutes the proud father went on to gush about his healthy, 7.4 pound daughter while everyone listened intently. He swore high and low that she was the most beautiful baby in the hospital and very possibly the whole of New York. Or better yet the East Coast. Kate, by the end of his (colourful) version of events, was made out to be a combination of Rambo, Superwoman and G. I. Jane. He did, however, leave out the parts where she threatened to make him cough up his phone, where she cursed him and his male anatomy and also where she had weeped in pain and exhaustion. This whole experienced only confirmed what he already knew: she was extraordinary, he was happy and they were a family.

And that was all he needed.

"Bro, did you get to record it?" Esposito asked.

Rick's mouth quirked up into a sardonic grin. "I have a clip of about two minutes... _b__efore_ I was advised that my physical wellbeing would be compromised if I continued."

Consequently, and rather reluctantly, the pot was split evenly between the gamblers.

* * *

XXX

_The next day... _

Kate's eyes fluttered open lethargically as she felt the sensation of fingers gently weaving through her hair. She blinked a few times and glanced around before her emerald greens settled onto the familiar pair of cobalt blues watching her.

His features were engulfed by a bright smile. "Hey," Rick greeted softly, continuing to rhythmically comb through her hair.

She smiled faintly and tilted her head. "Hi." Her voice was still raspy due to sleep. "You watching me sleep again?"

He chuckled lightly and kissed the top of her head. "Yeah and I'm not apologizing for it." He bent down to kiss her gently, his lips lingering for a moment before breaking away.

"Still creepy," she commented, her eyes drooping once again. Suddenly remembering the small bundle that she had in her arms not to long ago, Kate's eyes shot open and she jerked upright. "Where's-" She turned her body to the other side as her eyes frantically searched for the little human being.

"She's right here, Honey," Rick said gently, moving out of her line of vision to reveal the tiny, sleeping and occasionally wriggling form of their daughter.

Kate sighed and relaxed before sitting up. "Give her to me," she said, smiling gently and holding out her arms. Her husband complied and carefully lifted the infant out of the cot, pressing a soft kiss on her head before handing Lizzy over to her mother. He went on to sit on the bed next to his wife, wrapping an arm around her.

A wide, all-consuming and completely mesmerized smile overtook Kate's features as she took the baby in her arms. "Hey there, Honey. Hey there Mama's big girl... Did you miss me, huh?" The small form wriggled and stretched, her tiny eyes blinking a few times and her little mouth opening and closing a few times before she settled into her mother's arms. Kate watched her daughter with rapt attention, a small smile fastened to her lips. "I love you." She briefly tilted her head up towards Rick before turning her attention back to Lizzy. "Me and Daddy love a lot, baby girl," she continued to coo.

They sat in content silence as they studied their beautifully crafted daughter carefully. Rick rested his chin on Kate's shoulder and braced the arm that was around her, next to her on the bed.

"She has your mouth," he commented.

Kate smiled and nodded. "She has your nose."

"Really? You think so?"

"Mmm-hmm."

Rick pressed a kiss against his wife's cheek. "She's perfect." His voice cracked slightly and his eyes became moist. Kate turned her head towards him and smiled tenderly before pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

"Yes, she is."

"We make beautiful babies, don't we Mrs. Castle?"

The small smile that graced her lips now blossomed into a wide grin. "We sure do, Mr. Castle."

Silence descended once more as they sat quielty for a while, watching her sleep. Suddenly the sanguine smile on his face faded as his brow knitted together.

"Hey Kate?"

"Mmmm?"

His expression turned dead serious. "You don't really hate my penis, do you?"

_X-X-X-X_

_You make me smile like the sun, fall out of bed_  
_Sing like bird, dizzy in my head_  
_Spin like a record, crazy on a Sunday night_

_You make me dance like a fool, forget how to breathe_  
_Shine like gold, buzz like a bee_  
_Just the thought of you can drive me wild_  
_Oh, you make me smile_

* * *

**A/N: I really enjoyed writing this; especially Kate and Rick's interaction. I'm not so sure about the other parts of it, though. :-/ I was kinda going for funny in this one, so I hope it _is_ kinda funny.**

**So, what do you think? Did it live up to your expectation or was it kinda bleh? Please review and let me know. If you have any ideas, drop me a suggestion with your review.**

**Thanks for reading  
**

**P.S. I can literally NOT wait for 'Countdown'; it's gonna be epic! The lyrics at the end from a song by Uncle Kracker, 'Smile'. I just thought it would be cute to include.**

**As per usual, I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes. I will correct them if I spot them.**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Everyone, thank TappinCastlefan for this update.**

**Disclaimer - Castle and Beckett are not mine. Lizzy Castle, however, is all my creation. So hands off evil copyright Nazi's... Don't think they exist. Sorry, I'm really tired and blabbering in crack-fic form. On with the journey.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 20 – Daddy's Little Girl**

Pallid sunlight was starting to filter through the windows, gently illuminating the room and chasing away the shadows of the night. _'Today was going to be another scorcher'_, he absent-mindedly observed. Rick was lying on his side, propped up on his arm as he watched his exhausted wife while she got some much needed sleep. In the last four weeks since Kate and baby Lizzy returned from the hospital, Mommy and Daddy have been pulling near all-nighters with the newest addition to the Castle clan. Lizzy was proving to be a handful, an adorable and mesmerizing handful nonetheless. With each passing day, Rick felt his heart swell with pride (and a little apprehension) as his daughter became more and more beautiful. He had no doubt that Elizabeth Johanna Castle was going to be as gorgeous as her mother. Unfortunately, he didn't know whether to laugh or cry about that prospect...

Kate's lovely features were relaxed, despite the dark circles under her eyes, her breathing was even and her body was (cutely) pulled up into a fetal position, her hands clutching the pillow her head was laid on. Rick smiled softly as he brushed a dark strand of hair off her cheek – she was adorable. She looked like a little girl: sweet, innocent and vulnerable. He felt a stab of protectiveness (and possessiveness) tore through him as his eyes continued to study her in silent admiration. In this moment, she wasn't one of the NYPD's finest (and toughest) or his enigmatic muse or his sensual lover or even a new mother.

She was Kate. Simply… _Kate_.

The Kate only he got to see – the small, vulnerable one. Not even she got to see _that_ Kate. This was _his_ right, _his_ privilege. He smiled at the thought and bent down to press a gentle, but lingering kiss in her hair. He felt a familiar and powerful longing tug at his senses as he inhaled her scent. He really couldn't wait to make love to his wife again...

Just as the thought crossed his mind, he heard a stirring and gurgling sound emanating from the baby monitor. Their baby girl was seemingly starting to wake up. Deciding to give Kate a few minutes more to sleep, Rick extracted himself from bed – clad only in his Spongebob boxers – and quietly made his way to the fairytale-character inspired nursery.

"Hey baby girl, hey there Daddy's princess," he cooed softly as he picked up the small, wriggling form. He held her against his bare chest, nestling her protectively against his warmth.

"Couldn't sleep anymore, huh? Me too, Sweet Pea, me too." Baby Lizzy only opened her eyes sluggishly as she searched for the source of the familiar voice; her tiny mouth opened and closed a few times while bubbles escaped her lips. "Guess, you got your old man's bout of insomnia." Rick placed his forefinger in her tiny hand, smiling broadly when she immediately grabbed hold of it.

Yeah, he was done for it. Richard Castle was out for the count, bowled over, knocked out. And he didn't mind one bit - this was a fight he didn't mind losing. Just like with Alexis, he was completely and utterly smitten and he knew that he would be for the rest of his life. Elizabeth Johanna Castle was his little girl to love, protect and care for and he was her daddy; her silly, overprotective and playful daddy. At least they had Kate who would be the adult...

He went to sit down in the nearby chair, his attention fixed on his baby girl. "Okay, listen you and I need to discuss something. It's important," he said, his voice soft and mockingly serious. As if on cue, Lizzy squirmed in his arms and scrunched up her small face. Rick laughed lightly at this. "No don't worry, you're not in trouble, Sweet Pea... It's just..." He sighed heavily. "You can't grow up as fast as your big sister did, okay? You just... can't. I mean before I knew it Lex was all grown up and leaving the nest." Lizzy gurgled and briefly threw her tiny arms up in her air. "You need to promise me... pinky promise-" He placed his pinky in her small hand. "-that you'll always stay my little girl. Are we clear on that, Baby Bird?" Her response was to yawn and wriggle. He chuckled. "I'll take that as a yes," Rick said, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss on her head and breathing in her sweet, baby-shampoo scent. "I love you," he whispered against her ear.

Her heart melt and the butterflies danced in her stomach at the sight. Kate was leaning against the doorframe, watching Rick softly talking to their daughter. She had been there for the whole 'Conversation' without her husband noticing her presence. Kate was convinced that if he was going to keep being this adorably sweet, that she would not be able to wait to make another little human being with him. He was in a word, irresistable when he was being all bare-chested, domestic and fatherly. It was official: her husband was the sweetest, most endearing and cutest man on the planet. Kate felt herself fall a little more in love with him because of it. She smiled and pushed herself away from the doorframe, walking towards the two loves of her life.

"Mr. Castle, you are in serious trouble." Rick's head snapped up and he frowned in confusion. When he saw Kate smile broadly at him, he returned one himself.

"How so, Mrs. Castle?" He asked as she came to stand slightly behind him, clad in her usual sleep attire: yoga pants and one of his dress shirts.

She bent over his shoulder and gently brushed a finger over her daughter's head, while resting her free hand on his shoulder. "Well, your little girl has got you wrapped around her tiny finger already."

"So?" Their attention was on their baby.

"So, you're going to spoil her rotten."

"And what's wrong with that?"

"Well, I'm going to have to be bad cop, while you play good cop." He grinned widely at the whiny tone of his wife's voice. He and Lizzy was going to be a mean team.

"Ah, c'mon KC, you don't know that."

She pouted for affect and scoffed. "Hmm, sure I do... You two are going to gang up on me. I just know it."

He chuckled heartily at this and turned to look at his wife, who was still sporting a rather dramatic pout. "How so, Sweetheart?"

She shrugged before answering: "'Cause that's what fathers and their daughters do - they gang up on Mom." Her expression softened as a wistful smile tugged at her lips. "Bellieve me, I know." He watched her for a moment while she kept her eyes on Lizzy.

"Well, I let you be good cop once in while," he said with a smile. "Deal?"

She briefly looked at him, rolled her eyes and smiled. "Deal," she replied before pressing a lingering kiss against his lips. They returned their attention back to the infant in her father's arms.

After a while Kate spoke again. "But it still doesn't change the fact that she's already Daddy's little girl."

* * *

**A/N: Just a small one-shot I wrote tonight (or rather this morning). Not my greatest, but I just wanted to write something for this story. I'm in need of some Castle family fluff.**

**I'm sorry for the delay in updating, I've not had any ideas for this story until tonight. So please forgive me. Pretty please. **

**Review please and let me know what ya'll think! If you have any ideas, lemme know.**

**Thanks for reading.**

**I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes. I'll fix it when I spot them.**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: You guys have been so good to me, so I've decided to reward you with another update. See I can do the whole quicker update thing if I really want to. **

**I just want to give a shout-out to an anonymous reviewer named Skyler who has been reviewing basically every chapter - thank so much, I appreciate it. And that goes for everyone who has taken the time to read and review this story. Thanks! **

**Now this chapter is a little bit based on what my brother and his wife is going through right now - they have a 4-week old baby boy and, shame, poor things are tired out of their heads. *Sigh* The joys of parenthood. But he's worth it. I'm just glad I don't have to soothe him at three in the morning... or change his diapers. ;-)**

**On with out journey.**

**Disclaimer: No they don't belong to me, because if they did, the show would've have been about them going at it like bunnies. Wait. _What_?**

**Anywhoooo... enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 21 - The Joys of Parenthood**

Exhaustion.

Otherwise known as: tiredness, fatigue, collapse, overtiredness or, if you want to be creative, zombiness. Yeah, that pretty much was their life right now. Gone were the days of solving complex murders or going to star-studded book parties or having romantic dinners in fancy restaurants or making love for a whole night. Nope now it was all about feed the baby, burp the baby, change the baby, bathe the baby, soothe the baby, try to get the baby to sleep. And repeat cycle.

Unfortunately, Lizzy didn't get the whole sleep-thing or the please-stop-crying-thing her parents had going on. Because, you see dear sympathetic outsider, cute Baby Castle had colic. The really bad kind. And, well, it left her usually briliant parents clueless. Absolutely freakin' clueless. And absolutely freakin' grumpy. And absolutely freakin' tired. And absolutely freakin' frustrated out of their heads. So much so that you could cut the tension inside Casa del Castle between the two adult Castles with a knife. Of course that didn't help the situation with the little human being whom they both came to love with their whole hearts and minds.

Mama Castle - in a few words - was tired, had sore boobs, was tired some more, was frustrated and generally felt like a failure every time her daughter started crying for a seemingly no apparent reason. Papa Castle - in a few words - was also tired, felt completely helpless when he couldn't get his little girl to stop crying, was tired some more, and although he didn't have sore boobs, had a very serious case of sexual frustration. It really didn't help that his gorgeous wife's already alluring breasts were, ahem, _enhanced_. He had never in his life had so much 'private' bathroom time...

Ultimately the culmination of all these factors plus a heat wave that engulfed the city, brought them to the breaking point.

"Did you remember to buy milk?" Kate asked her husband as she searched through the grocery bags. The usually well put together detective was looking a little like a train-wreck survivor. A really attractive train-wreck survivor, mind you. Her hair was pulled up into a messy bun, her eyes had dark circles underneath them, the casual t-shirt she had on was covered in splotches of baby spit and other stains. In short, Kate Castle went from being a ridiculously gorgeous woman to merely a beautiful woman. To Rick, however, she was still ridiculously gorgeous... even with baby spit all over her.

He went to sit down at the kitchen counter and frowned at her question. "Uh, milk? Should I have?" His ruggedly handsome features were a little paler and scruffy than usual and his cobalt blue eyes were a little duller, their usual playful spark momentarily absent.

Kate lifted her head, briefly closed her eyes as her jaw clenched and let out a frustrated sigh. With the last strand of her patience, she slowly turned her head towards her equally exhausted and grumpy partner-in-life. When she spoke, her voice was steady, but her tone dangerously low. "I asked you very nicely to buy milk, Rick." Her tone was clipped as she said his name. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his scruffy features.

"Sorry, it must have slipped my mind," he said wearily with a shrug. Kate's jaw clenched even more and her actions became rigid and abrupt as she pulled out the items she sent her dear husband to buy a few minutes before.

"Great, just fantastic," she commented through gritted teeth, trying desperately to keep her cool.

Rick shifted in his seat and his brow furrowed. "I said I was sorry, Kate." His tone was a combination of exhaustion, frustration and irritation; he was also struggling to keep himself from snapping at her.

With her back turned to him, Kate continued to store the groceries. "I ask you to do one thing. One thing! And you don't get it right. So friggin' typical." Her voice was strained and low.

"Oh for Pete's sake, it's not like I did it on purpose!" He exclaimed loudly, losing his cool and throwing his arms up in the air. "Shit, you make it sound like I cheated on my taxes!"

She whipped around and glared at him. "Shhh! Keep your voice down, I _just_ put her to bed," she hissed. He was about to respond when the sounds of their daughter's crying sounded through the baby moniter. Kate closed her eyes, pursed her lips and momentarily threw her head upwards. When she glared at her husband a few moments later, her emerald green eyes were more moist than usual and her voice more a little shakier.

"Thanks Rick. Thank you _very_ much. I just spent more than an hour and a half to try to get her to finally sleep!" She spat, tears of exhaustion and frustration forming in her eyes. Rick immediately felt worse than a North African dictator and followed his upset wife as she stomped out of the kitchen.

"Kate, I'm sorry," he said, gently grabbing her arm and turning her towards him. "Honey, I got this, okay. Let me-"

She abruptly pulled her arm from his; her wet eyes flashing with anger. "No, _I_ got this. Just... stay here," she said with a sigh before making her way up the stairs to their crying baby. He stood at the edge of the stairs in defeat and watched her go up.

He meandered around aimlessly, storing the remaining grocery items and straigthening things up while he listened to Kate singing soflty to their daughter in a desperate effort to soothe her. After about fifteen minutes, much to his relief, Lizzy was finally quiet again. He waited for another ten minutes before he went in search for his wife.

Fully expecting Kate to still be with their daughter, he quietly peeked into the nursery. His brow furrowed in confusion when he didn't find her there and after kissing his baby girl goodnight, Rick walked to their bedroom. He found his tough detective sitting on the bed with her head in her hands and her shoulders shaking uncontrollably as she cried silently. Rick's heart broke a little when he saw her and he made his way to where she was sitting. Like a lot of new mothers she was feeling insecure, unsure and scared. Add exhaustion to that mix and you got yourself a recipe for an emotional breakdown.

He sat down next to her and gently rubbed soothing circles on her back in an effort to comfort her. After a minute or two, her crying subsided.

"Katie, look at me." When she didn't respond, he lifted her chin in order to look at her. "Honey, look at me." Her wet, blood-shot emerald greens briefly met his sympathetic cobalt blues for a few seconds before she darted them down again; seemingly embarassed by her emotional breakdown.

"Hey... what is it, Sweetheart?" Rick coaxed softly, tenderly rubbing a thumb over her tear-stained cheek.

She blinked furiously and swallowed hard in a desperate effort not to start crying again. "I'm... just so, _so_ tired, Rick," she admitted softly. "And she just won't stop crying." Tears were by now dripping one by one over the thresholds of her eyes. "I... don't... know... what... to... do... anymore," she gasped, the tears now flowing freely once more. "I... feel... like... such... a... failure."

Rick pulled her into a tight hug while she started to sob again, staining his shirt with her tears. He cradled her and periodically pressed soft kisses in her hair while murmuring "I love you", "You are extroadinary" and "Everything is going to be fine." After a few minutes, she calmed down and slightly pulled away from him.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly after a few moments.

Rick gave her a soft smile while he tucked a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. She smiled shyly at him and briefly locked her eyes with him. "Me too, Sweetheart, me too." He gave her a gentle kiss before drawing her in for a quick hug. Suddenly, he released her and got up, making his way to the bathroom. After a few moments, Kate could hear the sound of running water and frowned in confusion. Another few minutes later, her husband appeared again and held out a hand to her. He led her into the bathroom where soft candlelight flickered and where a warm bubble bath awaited her. Rick drew to her him and gave her a peck on the lips.

"Why don't you take a nice, long bath while I get started on dinner, hmmm? I'll bring you a glass of wine," he said with a smile. He released her and started for the door when she grasped his arm.

"Thank you," Kate responded with a soft smile. "Sometimes I don't deserve you."

He returned a gentle smile before it quickly turned into a mischievous smirk. "Can I please get that little confession on tape, Mrs. Castle?"

"Shut up," she muttered before pulling him down for a searing kiss. After breaking the kiss, Kate gently pushed her obvioulsy affected husband towards the door.

"Castle, dinner isn't going to make itself."

"I'll order some take-out," her murmured, trying to take hold of her again.

She laughed. "Well, that glass of wine isn't going to bring itself up here." He stood his ground and pouted like a six-year old. Kate decided to use her age-old winning tactic: teasing.

"Honey, the sooner you get me my glass of wine, the sooner you can watch me take a _long..._ _hot_ bubble-"

His eyes grew wide and before she could say 'bath' he was out the door.

She rolled her eyes and smiled to herself. "Works every time."

* * *

3:07 am.

"Your turn," Kate murmured sleepily, nudging her husband in the ribs. Their little girl was testing out her lungs again, much to her parents' dismay.

"Nah-uh," he responded, pulling a pillow over his head.

"Castle, I went last time. C'mon, it's your turn," she whined.

Still he stayed put, hoping that she would take the hint.

Kate huffed and sat up, deciding to use another tactic. "Fine, but next time I take a bubble bath, I'm locking the door."

He didn't need another incentive to get up.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, so it turned out differently than what I intended, but well there it is. Hope you guys liked it. **

**Review and tell me what you think!**

**I apologize for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes.**

**Thanks for reading.**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: I'm baaaacccckkkk! Finally! After more than a month, you are getting an update. I apologize dear readers, it has been crazy - lecturing, stressing about lecturing, lecturing, having a crisis of confidence due to the lecturing, lecturing some more, oh and preparing exam papers. That has been my life for the past 4 weeks. Hence, my fanfiction has suffered.**

**But, alas, thanks to the Easter weekend I have time to write some Casketty-goodness. I've been itching to do so for weeks! **

**So, here's the next installment. Okay I was planning on doing one chapter, but it got too long; so I've decided to write this in approximately three chapters with all of them following the events of one evening. I really don't know how I came up with this, it's just been in my head for the last few days.**

**Happy reading.**

**Happy Easter (and remember what it's all about)**

**Disclaimer: adorable little Lizzy belongs to me. Her equally adorable parents, however, do not.**

**(Updated version; spotted a few silly errors)**

* * *

**Chapter** **22 – Separation Anxiety**

"Kaaaaattteeee!" She rolled her eyes and huffed in annoyance at the whiny my-sibling-stole-my-chocolate-tone of her man-child husband. Still placing a few final pins in her up-do hair Kate walked to where Rick stood in front of the mirror; his expression similar to that of a helpless six-year old.

"I swear Castle, it's a miracle that you can tie your own shoe laces," she commented while she started on his bowtie. Leave it to the veteran of hundreds of black-tie parties, _not _to know how to tie a bowtie.

Utterly ridiculous.

He looked down at her - without her power heels, she was a head-and-a-half shorter than him - and grinned. She was more radiant than ever in a long, elegant, strapless and satin emerald green dress that brought out her eyes and hugged her figure beautifully - much to the appreciation of a certain mystery novelist-husband. He was not-so-subtly stealing glances at her 'girls'.

"I couldn't do the shoe laces-thing until I was ten."

"Why am I not surprised," she said absent-mindedly, her brow furrowed in concentration. An amused smile tugged at his mouth at her adorable expression.

"Well, I can't be perfect at everything." That earned an eye-roll… and a very reluctant upward tilt of her lips.

"There you go." Kate adjusted the bowtie, smiled and winked at Rick before turning away. But before she could get anywhere, he took hold of her wrist and pulled her back to him.

"Thank you." He gave her a quick kiss. "You look beautiful, KC," Rick murmured sincerely before kissing her again – a little more forcefully – before going on to plant feathery kisses on the edge of her jaw and side of her neck. Kate's mind fogged over as her eyes slid shut, enjoying the sensations for a few moments before snapping back to reality.

"Okay, down boy. We have a party to go to. Remember?"

"We can skip it." He continued to press kisses in her neck.

She laughed. "I didn't spend three hours in hair salon and more than seven hours in various boutiques with Lanie last week - which, by the way, was worse than torture - for nothing, Castle."

"You know I'm just gonna take it off anyway, right?" He grinned at her impishly.

She returned a sly grin herself, fiddling idly with his suspenders. "Yeeaaahhh… but not yet, Writer Monkey. Patience is a virtue." She patted his cheek while he pouted. Kate glanced over his shoulder. "Besides, we have an audience." Rick turned around and smiled broadly at the scene.

Their adorable, chubby-cheek four-month old baby girl was lying flat on her stomach in the middle of the bed, thoroughly engrossed in Snuggles. Snuggles, the soft, fluffy, chiming and always-smiling bear had become her best friend and closest confidant who never left her side. _Ever_. Snuggles was there when she went to sleep, when she got a bath (albeit not in the bathtub, but at least on the edge), when she got changed, when she ate her meals and also when she had to go to the Little Humans Doctor. Sure, her parents were great - Mommy fed her, sang to her when she was upset and played a strangely fascinating game where she would hide behind her hands and then pop out behind them, exclaiming peek-a-boo (she'll find out later why that game had such a silly, yet amusing name). Daddy was funny and made her laugh, especially when he spoke in silly voices and when he blew raspberries on her tummy. But, sometimes a four-month old just needed someone to relate to, you know? Like a fluffy bear who sang a song when you hugged her.

"Hey Sweet Pea." Lizzy greeted her daddy with an all gums-smile and Rick grinned widely. "What are you doing, baby girl?" He lied down on his side on his elbow and pressed the button on Snuggles that made the toy sing. Upon hearing the cheerful, albeit annoying, tune emanating from her fluffy companion, Lizzy let out a squeal of delight, clapping her little hands together. Her father couldn't resist flipping her on her back and blowing a few raspberries on her stomach making her squeal and giggle even more.

Kate smiled as she watched them in the reflection of the mirror. Her smile, however faded, as she caught sight of the baby bag on the floor. Tonight Lizzy was going to have a sleepover at her Aunt Lanie and Uncle Javi's so that Mom and Dad could go the mayor's ball and have some much-needed _quality_ time together, which had been few and far between since their little bundle's arrival. Even though Kate knew that it was needed and even though she was actually looking forward to an evenig without diapers and baby spit, somewhere in her mother's heart she felt an uncomfortable tug. She didn't like it. At all. She didn't look forward at not seeing her little cupcake for a whole _night_. It was the first time that she was not going to be the one to get up at three in the morning to feed her daughter or to soothe her or to cradle her.

Her thoughts were interrupted with the chime of the doorbell.

"Wow, they're on time... for once," Rick said, getting up and looking at his watch. He turned back to Lizzy on the bed. "Probably because they're looking after the most beautiful baby in the whole wide world." With a kiss on her head, he hurried out the room to go and greet their babysitters; not noticing his wife's crestfallen expression.

Kate sighed and looked at herself in the mirror again. _'You can do this, Kate. It's just one night. Just one.'_

"Where's my ridiculously cute goddaughter!" Lanie's voice echoed as she ascended the stairs.

"We're in here Lanie!" Kate called out.

"Oh hey-" Lanie stopped and nodded her head in approval while perusing her friend's outfit. "Wow, girl, you look absolutely gorgeous! What did I tell you?"

"Thanks Lanie." Kate smiled broadly.

"Uh-uh-uh. Thanks Lanie for going with me-"

"-and letting me spend more than seven hours in at least fifteen boutiques."

"Well, it was worth it, wasn't it?" Lanie smirked.

Kate nodded and returned a smile. "Yes, thank you, it was."

Lizzy gurgled and squealed again. The petite ME immediately turned her attention to the adorable bundle of plump limbs. "As glad as I am to see my best friend, I'm actually here to steal away this little cutie pie." She picked up her goddaughter who watched her with rapt attention. "Hey sweetie. You looking forward to spending some time with Aunt Lanie and Uncle Javi? We're going to have so much fun!" Lizzy smiled toothlessly and threw her arms around in the air. "Yes we are honey," Lanie continued to coo. She noticed the bag on the floor, picked it up and turned to Kate who finished putting on her earrings, her eyes a little more moist than usual.

"This her bag?" Lanie asked.

"Uh, yeah." Kate cleared her throat and turned around, briefly smiling at her friend.

Her brow, however, furrowed a few moments later. "Lanie, you still have the list I gave you right? She eats at just past seven and again at ten. Oh and she usually likes to take her bath before-"

"-she goes to sleep. I know Kate, you almost made me write a test on this."

Undeterred Kate rambled on. "Remember that Snuggles goes everywhere she does. She hasn't been feeling well, she had a bit of a fever the other day and the doctor prescribed-"

Lanie shifted Lizzy and cocked an eyebrow. "Kate. You know I'm a doctor, right?"

Kate let out a breath and smiled. "Sorry, it's just, well she hasn't been feeling well and-"

"Sweetie, we got this. Stop worrying."

Lanie noticed the subtle tension in Kate's expression and frowned slightly. "You okay, Kate?"

"Mmm-hmmm, yeah I'm fine." _Lie. Lie. Lie. 'It's just one night, Kate. Just one.'_

Lanie sighed and shook her head. Kate was a bad liar. "Girl, you and Writer Boy need to get some down time. It's just one night." A sly smile slowly pulled her lips upward. "Besides, it seems that you need to get laid. Maybe more than once... Seriously, you're way too tense."

"Lanie!" Kate blushed. "Not in front of my daughter."

"Okay, okay. Sorry." Lanie grinned. And then as if to sense Kate's inner turmoil she handed Lizzy over to her mother. "Here, you take her so that I can take the bag... and Snuggles."

The two and a half women descended the stairs and found Rick and Esposito engaged in an intense discussion about what shaving cream was the best.

"Hey, Carrie and Miranda, we're ready if you two girls are," Lanie smirked.

"We were born ready, _chica_," Esposito said, proudly pushing out his chest.

"We're the embodiment of readiness," Rick stated emphatically.

Lanie snorted and laughed. "Puhlease."

Rick turned to Esposito, his expression serious. "I hope you're ready for diaper-duty." Upon hearing this, the Latino detective's face paled considerably.

Rick smiled, but it faded upon realising that Kate wasn't involved in the friendly banter. Rather, she was quietly holding Lizzy and smiling uninterestedly at the conversation. He decided to ask her about it later.

"Hey Lizzy, you ready to go?" Esposito cooed, walking towards Kate; his fear of diapers momentarily forgotten. He planned to get himself out of diaper-duty while his fiancé was intent on making him practise. "Come to Uncle Javi." He grinned and held out his arms and Kate reluctantly handed over her daughter.

He turned to Lanie, who was busy watching him with the unmistakeable I-want-to-carry-this-man's-babies-expression. "You ready?"

"Yeah." They turned towards Rick and Kate. She was tensely wringing her hands together.

"Okay, guys enjoy your evening," Lanie said with a teasing wink.

"Oh we will Dr. Parish," Rick returned with a grin while wrapping an arm around Kate's (tense) shoulders. "We will."

"Say bye Mommy, bye Daddy," Esposito said waving Lizzy's plump little arm.

"Bye Sweet Pea," Rick said stepping forward and pressing a kiss on his daughter's head.

Kate stepped forward as well. "Bye honey." She kissed Lizzy's hand. "Bye baby, I'm gonna miss you," she whispered before kissing her head. With that the two babysitters left, leaving the abandoned parents to their own devices.

A few moments of silence passed with Kate staring at the door and Rick swaying back and forth, his hands in his pockets. He let out a breath before breaking the silence.

"You ready to go, KC?" He stepped in behind her and wrapped his arms around her.

Kate sighed, leaned back into him and nodded. "Yeah... yeah I am."

"Well, let's get this party started then, Mrs. Castle," Rick said, pressing a gentle kiss on the side of her neck.

She turned around in his arms and draped her arms around his neck. "Lead the way, Mr. Castle."

* * *

**A/N: the next chapter will follow from this and should not take a month before it's up. ****It's Kate and Rick's first real evening out on the town and the first evening they spend without Lizzy. **

**I hope you liked it and I hope I haven't lost my touch with them in this month that I've been away.**

**Please, as per usual, review and tell me what you think.**

**I apologize for any grammar or spelling mistakes.**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: What can I say? It's a long weekend, hence the speedy update and, well, I already know what I wanted to do. This is the function-scene and is mostly Rick and Kate with some Lanie at the end; the next chapter will follow from here.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: they're not mine. I promise.**

**Updated version (spotted a few errors)**

* * *

**Chapter 23 – All the small things**

Details.

Rick Castle was a details-man. Being an author, it was kind of an occupational necessity. You don't write twenty-plus bestsellers without the details. And his favourite pastime for the last few years has been cataloging every detail and nuance of a certain beautiful homicide detective and engraving them on the slates of his mind.

Rick sighed. He never got tired of studying his muse.

His gaze swept over her in fervent reverence, silently worshipping every inch of her with his pilgrim eyes (which she, of course, found excessively creepy). He was rubbing gentle, slow circles on the long, slender fingers that were laid on his upper leg, occassionally running his thumb over the diamond encrusted wedding band. Her small hand rested on his leg with the familiarity of being there for the last fifty years. They were matching pieces of a puzzle, in synch and wholly besotted with each other and the life they have built.

His eyes came to focus on the column of her neck – he loved her neck; it was the first place he went to in order to draw out that first moan. It was the place he felt her life; her strong, pulsating heartbeat. He _really, really_ wanted to kiss her there now, but if he did, he wouldn't be able to be held accountable for his actions which might include ripping off her $1000 dress and having his way with her in the back of a limousine (again) with Louis the Driver as a witness. His eyes slowly moved down towards her collarbone and bare shoulders to where his lips always seemed to be drawn out of their own volition. He couldn't stop himself – she was intoxicating. Her skin was soft and glowed and shimmered in the darkness (was she wearing that glitter body lotion he loved so much?). His eyes continued their journey and came to an immediate halt to where her chest was rising and falling, making him thank the powers above for figure-hugging dresses. His pilgrim eyes paid a lengthy homage to that beloved part(s) of her body before slowly making their way up again - this time to her beautifully sculptured face. God really outdid Himself with her. Rick made a mental note thank Him later.

He looked at her up-do hair which his hands loved so much to weave through. He loved it in any style, but mostly when the silky locks were haphazardly spread across his chest. He studied the curve of her jaw which he loved to trace with his fingers (and lips). Her high cheekbones that he loved to pepper with soft kisses. Her olive green eyes that he loved to see sparkle with mischievous amusement, scorching desire and genuine, unbridled affection. Her mouth which he loved, well, because it was the part of her that he first got a taste of. Her soft, trance-inducing, all-coherent-thoughts-melting lips.

He _really_, _really_ wanted to kiss her now.

A thumb, however, was blocking his way. Rick cocked his head to the side and frowned as he brought all the details that was Kate Castle together. Her brow was furrowed, her eyes seemed troubled and her thumb nail was lodged in between her lips like when she was thinking really hard or over-analyzing something. His hand left hers on his leg and gently brushed her cheek with the back of his fingers, startling her from whatever she was obsessing about.

"Hey, what's going on in that pretty head of yours?" Rick asked softly. Kate smiled faintly and dropped her eyes from his.

"Nothing." She looked out the window again, her brow furrowing once more. His did too. "Maybe I should call Lanie and just make sure that she hasn't forgotten something. That they're alright." Rick's expression cleared when the realisation hit him: his tough detective was having a little bit of separation anxiety.

He stopped her when she started to pull out her cell phone. "Honey, I'm sure they're fine. We're talking about Lanie here. You know her right? She has five nephews and nieces and Esposito has about six. They've done this before... I think they can handle it."

She nodded silently (and reluctantly), her eyes and fingers suddenly finding his second anniversary cufflinks fascinating.

"Besides, they'll call if it's necessary."

Kate returned a brief smile and nodded. "I know. It's just-" She let out a breath and pursed her lips. "-what if she gets scared or something or what if her fever starts again. The doctor said that it could get worse. I mean, what if-"

He held up a hand and cut her off. "Kate, relax. She's fine. You saw her earlier, she didn't have a fever anymore and again, it's Lanie, who by the way is a doctor." He paused for a moment, watching her adorably chewing her lip, fighting to keep her emotions in check. "You're just having a little bit of separation anxiety, aren't you?" He stated softly; her eyes snapping up to meet his.

After a moment she nodded and replied on a sigh. "Yeah, I guess so."

He gave her a sweet, lopsided smile and pulled her closer. "It's perfectly normal, Sweetheart." Rick pressed a kiss on her temple and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. They stayed like that for a few moments before he broke the silence. "You wanna skip the party?" He didn't want to; in fact he had been looking forward to this since they got their invitations a month ago. But whatever Kate wanted, he wanted.

She sat up, took a breath and shook her head stubbornly. "No. I've been looking forward to tonight for a long time... I'm just being silly."

He cupped her cheek. "You're not being silly." A teasing grin lit up his features. "Well, except when you're imitating the Chipmunks or playing guitar hero. But that's cute-silly and I love it when you're cute-silly." Kate rolled her eyes and smiled widely. Rick grinned broadly, pleased with himself for making her smile.

Her expression sobered after a few moments, her tone low and sincere."Thank you."

"Always." Kate pressed a sweet kiss against his mouth.

The car came to a stop amid flashing lights and loud screams.

"Well Mr. Castle, let's go and have ourselves a good time."

He gently grasped her chin. "You're sure?"

She nodded her head with a smile before leaning in for another kiss. "Yeah. I'm in need of some dancing and adult conversation."

"Hey, I'm adult conversation!"

She grinned widely as Louis opened the door. "Oh _puhlease, _Geekboy. Don't make me laugh!"

* * *

After surviving the red carpet, flashing cameras and irritating gossip mongers, the two Castles finally entered the arena for the Mayor's Annual Charity Ball that attracted New York high society. The ballroom of the Waldorf was a vision of gold and red, beautiful flower arrangements and elegant tables. They made their way to table 5 (heads turning as the dark-haired beauty passed by) and was met by two familiar faces.

"Rick! Kate!" Jonahtan McFarlane greeted with a broad smile. His wife, Denise, turned around and greeted them with the same expression her husband did. If there were ever two people who were made for each (other than our favourite couple, the Castles, of course), it was Jonathan and Denise McFarlane. Tall, blonde, blue-eyed beauties - and both doctors. They were freakishly alike. At first, Rick and Kate were skeptical about their 'charity buddies' and their perfect Stepford-Wiveish vibe (as Rick called it), but after bonding over boring speech after boring speech at the two previous charity events, they became fast friends.

"Hey guys!" Rick grinned, pulling out his wife's chair.

"Hey!" Kate greeted with genuine excitement as the two women hugged briefly. They exchanged the customary 'wow-you-look-so-gorgeous-I-wish-I-could-wear-that-like-you-do'-compliments and took their places at the table. After exchanging pleasantries, the conversation shifted towards the other patrons attending the shin-dig.

"So, who do we have with us this year?" Rick inquired, placing his arm around the back of Kate's chair. The McFarlanes glanced at each other then turned back to the Castles, their expressions unreadable.

Kate's smile dropped. "Please don't say Vivienne Rutterford," she said quickly.

Denise laughed and shook her head. "No, no! Luckily not. Table 12 has that _delightful _privilege."

"Thank God," Kate murmured.

"But we will be joined by Gary Johnson and his twenty-something bimbo wife... _Again_," Jonathan commented. Kate rolled her eyes and Rick shook his head in amusement. Gary Johnson was a wealthy seventy-year old banking tycoon who had an insatiable appetite for young playboy-bimbo's; it was his third wive in five years.

"That should be amusing. Maybe we should discuss Moby Dick again," Rick said. The four burst out laughing, recalling how one of Gary's bimbo's frowned upon hearing the name and asked whether 'Dick' was that famous, bald-headed DJ's surname.

"Other than that we don't know. We're hoping for the best," Denise commented. She turned to look at Kate as the two men started on a discussion about golf. "So, how's the baby? What's her name again?"

"Lizzy. Ah, she's great... perfect." She seached for her phone, her face alight with a beaming smile. "Here. Take a look." She handed her phone to Denise.

"Oh Kate! She's adorable!" Kate nodded and grinned proudly. "Aw, she's just beautiful. Congratulations," Denise said smiling, handing the phone back.

"Thanks," Kate replied still beaming. "She just grows so quickly, you know?"

Denise let out a laugh. "Tell me about it."

Before Kate could reply, Rick turned to her. "KC, do you want something?"

"Uh, yeah-"

"A glass of red wine?"

She smiled and nodded. "You know me too well."

He returned a cheeky grin. "See, staring is useful."

Kate raised her eyebrows. "Still creepy." He laughed and kissed her cheek before getting up.

Rick walked towards the bar, completely unaware of the predatory pair of eyes following him. He stood at the bar and placed his order, not noticing the predator stalking her prey.

"Richard Castle-" He jumped at the sudden voice behind him and turned around. Bottle blonde hair. White teeth. Boobs. Lots of boobs. "-what a pleasant surprise," Vivienne Rutterford said in a sultry tone, her eyes slowly raking over his tuxedo-clad form.

Rick instinctively backed up against the bar as she took a step closer. "Uh Vivienne... hi." He let out a nervous chuckle and immediately started to glance around for Kate.

The petite and attractive 40-something real housewife of New York took another step closer. "My, don't you look handsome in a tux." She flashed him a broad grin.

"T-thank you..." And as an afterthought he added: "You look well too." _'Kate, help!' _his mind yelled.

_Meanwhile back at table 5..._

"...So that's why decided on contributing to Red Cross. It just made sense," Jonathan finished with a shrug. The three remaining occupants of table 5 were discussing the reason they were at this function in the first place.

"Well Rick and I thought about contributing to the NYPD's children's fund." Kate's brow furrowed as she started to look around for the mystery novelist. "By the way, where is my husband?" The other two also started to glance around for the fourth member of their little group.

"Uh-oh," Denise started. "Seems like Viv has cornered him, Katie," she continued, pointing towards the cougar and her helpless prey at the bar. Kate tensed, clenched her jaw and narrowed her eyes.

"Excuse me." Her tone was low and strained.

_Back at the bar..._

"I really loved your last book, Richard." Vivienne flashed a perfectly white grin. "Especially the love scenes," she added in a mock-whisper.

"Uh, yeah. Thanks," he replied awkwardly. "I wouldn't be able to do it without-"

Vivienne cut him off and shifted gears. "Are you here alone?"

Before a clearly rattled Rick could answer, Kate sidled up next to him; possessively pressing herself into his side while taking hold of his arm.

Pretending not to see Mrs. Plastic Surgery, she chatted eagerly with her husband. "Honey, you will not believe what Nathan just told me!" If looks could kill, Kate would be dead and Vivienne Rutterford would be behind bars. "They got a little place on the French Riviera for a reasonable price. I think we-" Then pretending to notice the other woman she exclaimed in fake surprise. "Oh Vivienne, hi! Didn't see you there." _Lie, lie, lie. _

Vivienne flashed a stiff smile. "Kate." If it was said with anymore coolness, the world would be experiencing a second ice age. "So good to see you."

Kate returned an equally taut smile, laced with _'I'll-scratch-your-eyes-out-if-you-make-a-move-on-my-husband'_-subtext. "You too."

_Fake. Fake. Fake. _Rick struggled to keep an amused smile off his face - his wife was on top of her game tonight. Despite being almost completely surrounded by women for most of his life, Rick Castle still found the polite cat-fights that the female gender engaged in, fascinating.

The other woman glanced back and forth between the couple and shifted uncomfortably. Finally she said: "Well, enjoy your evening." With that Bottle Blonde & Boobs went off to find fresh meat.

Kate immediately released her tight, possessive grip on Castle's arm and muttered a few insults under her breath as she stared daggers into the other woman's back. Vivienne Rutterford had been after Rick Castle for years... and she didn't care whether he was married or whether he had just become a father for the second time. She was Delilah and Jezebel all rolled into one; the kind of woman mothers warned their sons about. She was also the reason why Kate once had her way with Rick in one of the linen closets of the very same Waldorf Hotel (he was _very _fond of that linen closet). But that's a story for another day...

Rick grinned and gave her a quick kiss. "My hero." He let out a relieved breath. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it, Writer Boy," Kate smiled while adjusting his bowtie. After a few moments, she pursed her lips and frowned. "She just never gives up, does she?"

"No." A devilish grin appeared on Rick's lips. "Does this mean I'm getting a repeat performance of the infamous linen closet-episode?"

Kate returned a sly smile and bit her lip flirtatiously. "Not. A. Chance."

His impish grin grew as he leaned in to whisper in her ear. "Do you know how it turns me on when you mark your territory like that, Mrs. Castle? It's hot, incredibly hot." His breath tickled her skin and he heard her suck in an unsteady breath. His smile grew - she was just as turned on. Maybe that linen closet may well see a repeat performance tonight... A guy could only hope.

"Cool it, Loverboy." She looked at him, her eyes sparkling playfully. "I want dinner and dancing _before _dessert."

* * *

And dinner and dancing, a lot of dancing, were what Kate got. The two Castles got off the dance floor laughing and panting after a lively swing number; they've been on the dance floor on-and-off for the last hour or so. They were having a blast and Kate was thoroughly enjoying herself - this was just what she needed, what _they_ needed. A night out on the town, a little bit of dancing and adult conversation. But, despite the fun she was having, a small, plump and adorable human bundle and that bundle's welfare were constantly in the back of her mind.

"What's the time?" Kate asked Rick once they were seated again.

"Uh... about eight-thirty," he replied after checking his watch.

"I'm quickly going to make a call." Rick nodded in understanding; she was going to call Lanie. "Excuse me," she directed to the rest of the group which now consisted of Gary and Amber (bimbo-wife number five) Johnson, a Peter Davies and his date for the night (Sue or Susan or something like that) and Scott Avery, one of the mayor's campaign contributors, and his beautiful, red-headed, but haughty wife, Michelle.

A few minutes later Kate returned, her expression a little bit more tense than usual. She smiled politely at something Denise said and tried to engage in conversation, but when she grew quiet during a particularly funny story that Scott Avery was relaying, Rick knew - from studying her closely for years - that something was off. It wasn't major, but it definitely was _something_.

He leaned in towards her while the others continued to laugh and talk. "Is everything okay, KC? What did Lanie say?" His voice was filled with concern.

She took in a breath and fixed her eyes on her hands in her lap. "Uh, yeah... yeah. They're fine," she answered softly, her brow briefly furrowing. Rick frowned; he was sure that nothing was wrong with their daughter, but there was something else bothering his wife. He turned his body fully towards her and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"Kate," he said firmly, but softly. She looked up at him, her eyes hesitant. "What's wrong?"

Her olive green eyes darted away from his and vaguely looked around the room before fixing them on her hands again. "She was crying," came her meek reply. She swallowed hard, frowned and pursed her lips. Kate looked up again and met his gaze; her eyes glistening with emotion. "When I spoke to Lanie, I heard her crying in the background."

He nodded. "Oh... And?"

She gave a noncommittal shrug. "When I asked Lanie, she said that Lizzy was fine, it was just some winds."

Rick let out a relieved breath, but his brow furrowed again. "Okay, so what's got you so upset?"

Her eyes snapped up to his again. "She was _crying_, Rick," she shot back heatedly. Her voice, however, quickly softened. "And I wasn't there," her tone was vulnerable and small.

He watched her for a long time, not sure what to say. Suddenly he stood up and held out a hand towards her. "C'mon." Kate looked up at him in confusion. "Come on," he repeated. She took his hand and he led her to the dance floor where a slow ballad was playing.

"Rick I'm not in the mood-"

He placed a finger on her lips. "We're here to enjoy ourselves, right?"

"Yeah, but-"

"No, Kate." His tone brooked no argument as he tugged her towards him. "We're here to enjoy our evening. We're not doing anything wrong, so stop feeling guilty."

She nodded slightly and sighed. "I know," she mumbled unhappily, letting her eyes drop onto his chest. He lifted her chin.

"Tell you what - we'll call Lanie again later to check up on things, okay?" She nodded again and smiled faintly. "That sound good to you?"

"Yes, okay." Kate let out a breath, her mouth curving into a grin. "Castle, if you're going to dance with me, we need to start moving."

He laughed and pulled her closer before kissing her deeply. "Aye, aye Detective."

* * *

_Two hours later outside the Waldorf..._

Rick pulled out his phone and dialled the familiar number. After a few rings, the petite ME answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey Lanie," Rick greeted.

"Oh hey Castle." She checked her watch, 22:51. "You do realise it's almost eleven right?" Lanie reprimanded lightly. He shook his head and chuckled while turning around to look for his wife who was still inside.

"My apologies Dr. Parish." He paused for a moment. "So, I take it everything's still alright?"

Lanie sighed. "Castle, your daughter is still in one piece, I assure you. She's sleeping like an angel."

"Ah, that's good to know - especially the whole she's still in one piece-part," Rick replied sarcastically. His tone, however, grew sincere. "Thank you, Lanie. I was really just calling for Kate's sake. If I hadn't stopped her tonight, she would have been checking up on you every half hour."

Lanie's mouth curved up. "Separation anxiety, huh?"

He sighed and nodded. "Yeah, something like that."

"Well assure our girl that her mini-me is just fine... and incredibly adorable."

Rick smiled proudly. "She is, isn't she?"

"The most precious thing I've ever seen!"

"Again, thank you. Tell Esposito as well. We needed tonight."

"It's not a problem, Castle. We love her. Hell, I'm considering keeping her all to myself." He chuckled. "And Writer Boy?"

"Yeah?"

"Please get my girl laid, she's way too tense."

* * *

**A/N: Eeehhh. This feels eh. I feel that Kate is a litte OCC in this; don't know. *Shrugs*. It sort mutated into something else.**

**Please review and tell me what you think. Was is good or was it bad? Or just mediocre?**

**Again, I apologize for any spelling or grammar mistakes.**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: I'm really spoiling you, aren't I? Three (longish) chapters in the last few days. 'What's this' you ask? It's called a long-weekend. Savour it. And write fanfiction...**

**Anyway, thank you for all the reviews! Especially for the last chapter; I'm really pleased to hear that Kate wasn't OOC. I'm not a mom, but if ya'll say that's how new moms act, then I'm glad that her reactions seem realistic. This is the last chapter... **

**Of this little theme! (Haha). And it includes some Kate and Rick (minor) conflict and Kate and Rick sexy time. Don't worry it's nothing too raunchy, but it's definitely T-rated for sexual content.**

**Disclaimer: they do not belong to me. *Falls to knees and shakes fists while exclaiming a torrent of 'whys!'***

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter 24 – I believe in a thing called love**

'_I wonder if Lanie found the Tylenol in the side-pocket,'_ Kate thought, chewing her thumb nail. Her brow furrowed. _'Did I remember to tell her about it?' _Her expression cleared for a moment._ 'Crap, I didn't!' _She immediately dropped her hand, tensed ad straightened. Rick, who had his arms wrapped around her from behind and his chin on her shoulder, noticed. They were in the elevator of their apartment building, lost in their own thoughts – Rick about how he was going to take off the figure-hugging, emerald green dress and Kate about how she was going to call Lanie and make sure her child was still alive.

As if to sense what she was thinking, Rick spoke. "I talked to Lanie earlier." Kate immediately cocked her head to look at him, her expression expectant. "She told me to assure you that our daughter was fine and I quote 'sleeping like an angel'."

She let out a breath, relaxed her posture and smiled faintly. "Oh." Her brow furrowed once more as she looked at him again. "When did you talk to her?"

Rick pressed a kiss behind her ear and rubbed her arms that were now fully submerged in his black suit jacket that she had on. "Just before we left. You were still inside, so I made a quick call." He pressed another kiss just below her jaw. Kate, however, wasn't focused on his lips on her skin, but rather on finding out what Lanie's _exact _words were.

"And that's all she said?"

"Mmm-hmm." Another kiss, this time on her pulse point. A devilish grin grew on his lips. "Well that and the request that I get you laid." He lightly nipped at her skin. "Apparently, Mrs. Castle, you are way too tense," he said in a low, husky tone. "I'd be more than happy to _relieve _some of that tension." He moved up to lightly suck on her earlobe.

Kate's eyes closed involuntarily and she bit her lip, fighting off a moan. "Is that so?" She teased back, her voice a little shaky.

"Mmm-hmmm," he murmured, moving down to kiss the side of her jaw again. Before Kate could reply, the elevator dinged and opened. Rick stepped out in front of her and took her hand, smirking when he saw her dazed expression.

"C'mon. I think there's a bottle of ridiculously expensive red wine just waiting for our consumption."

Kate smiled and weaved her fingers with his. "Lead the way, Mr. Castle."

The Tylenol in the side-pocket, Lanie's potential ignorance of that fact and the wellbeing of her mini-me, however, were not far from Kate's mind as they entered the loft.

* * *

_Ten minutes later..._

"Castle, are you trying to seduce me?" Kate asked with a raised eyebrow and a teasing smirk. She was comfortably sitting on the large leather couch, shoes off, hair down and a glass of wine in hand. She was feeling more relaxed - partly due to the wine and largely due to the knowledge that her baby girl was fine and apparently fast asleep.

Rick turned around and flahsed her a devious grin. He was busy lighting a multitude of candles in order to set the mood - tonight wasn't just going to be a quick tumble in the sheets. Tonight he was going to make love to his wife - _All_. _Night_. _Long_.

At least that was the plan.

To say that the last few months had been a dry spell for them would be a grave understatement. After getting the go-ahead from the doc to resume the privileges of married life again, they celebrated the joyous occassion by having a quickie in the shower one morning while Martha watched Lizzy. It wasn't sexy or sweet or planned - it was pure primal need. And a little bit of lust. Other opportunities of coital bliss, however, came (no pun intended) few and far between; mostly in the afternoons between 14h00 and 15h00, and if they were lucky up until 15h15. Again it was usually hard and fast; no time for foreplay, their usual playful teasing or gentle caresses - it was pure, blistering primal want... and, again, a good dose of lust. But it rarely happened because most afternoons the two newbie parents would collapse into exhausted heaps, taking the opportunity to recuperate while their little person napped. Tonight, however, Papa and Mama Castle were going to have themselves a little bit of uninterrupted adult fun...

At least that was the plan.

"Is it working?" He asked, waggling his eyebrows.

"Throw in a striptease and we'll talk again," she shot back casually, her eyes dancing playfully. He cocked his eyebrows as the grin on his lips grew mischievous.

"I think that can be arranged," he replied before starting to hilariously mimick Hans the Male Stripper; getting rid of his bowtie with a flourish and playing with his suspenders before oh-so-very-slowly pulling them down one by one. Kate laughed at his silly antics and occassionally whistled in encouragement. Her husband was hot, handsome and sexy as hell and she was damn proud of the fact that he was all hers. Eat your heart out Vivienne Rutterford...

When he started to (very comically) dance in front of her, swinging and pushing his hips suggestively in her direction with his hands behind his head, Kate laughed, grabbed hold of his suspender-free shirt and tugged him towards her on the couch.

Once next to her, he quickly pulled Kate onto his lap and tightly encased her in his arms. "Well, did it work? Are you _aroused_?" He asked wiggling his eyebrows.

"Don't quit your day job, Writer Boy," she replied biting her lower lip while absent-mindedly playing with his shirt collar.

He pouted unhappily. "Do you know how difficult it is to do that without music?" Kate threw her head back and giggled (yes _giggled_). He grinned broadly upon hearing her very girly giggle.

She looked at him again, her eyes filled with amusement. "Move that ass, get on the floor," she deadpanned.

He laughed heartily, his eyes crinkling in delight. They looked at each other for a few moments, grinning like the two besotted idiots that they were. Rick's smile, however, slowly faded as he brushed a loose strand of her previously up-do hair behind away from her cheek. His eyes started their sacred journey again, a slow fire building behind their smoldering gaze. Kate noticed how his gaze swept over her appreciatively and how his cobalt blues darkened.

"You really did look beautiful tonight, Kate." The sudden softness and sincerity of his voice took her by surprise. She swallowed and felt her heart rate pick up. Kate knew that she wasn't looking at Richard Castle, mystery novelist extroadinaire or Richard Castle, shadow and pseudo-partner or Richard Castle, father of two now. The man currently making love to her with his eyes was simply Rick. _Her_ Rick. Her best friend, adoring husband and, right now, her fervent lover.

"Thank you," she replied almost shyly, her voice a mere whisper.

"You still do," he murmured, cupping her cheek. He softly caressed it and tenderly ran his thumb along her mouth in silent admiration. She closed her eyes and leaned in to the touch. "You always do," he continued in a quiet whisper before meeting her lips in a gentle kiss; his lips devoted pilgrims on hers. His tongue joined them in devotion while her mouth molded into his. The meeting of their mouths was a slow, sizzling and erotic dance. Not new or unexpected, yet still utterly intoxicating and electrifying - just like the first time they did this. Eventually he moved his pair of worshippers to the curve of her jaw and the column of her neck, taking time to pay homage to that hallowed parts of her body. He drew out that first pleasureable moan when he left a trail of hot, opened-mouth kisses on her pulse point, nipping lightly at her skin. He smiled against her skin - she was done for it... Putty in his hands, just like he was in hers.

_'Did he tell Lanie about the Tylenol?' _The thought unexpectantly and without invitation rushed through Kate's head. She tried to shake it off, her mind fogging when her husband plunged his tongue into her mouth again in another toe-curling kiss. The Tylenol and Lanie's potential ignorance of that fact, unfortunately, did not leave her thoughts. She had to make sure.

"Rick." Her voice was breathy and low, sending a delicious shiver down his spine. He had her now pinned on the couch beneath his body, assualting her with his mouth and hands and rendering her completely speechless.

"Mmmm?" He responded, expecting her to say something sexy and maybe even a little dirty.

He loved it when she talked dirty.

"Did you tell Lanie about the Tylenol in the side pocket?" She asked, her eyes closed and her voice shaky as he dragged his tongue across her collarbone while one of his hands copped an enthusiastic feel inside the front of her figure-hugging dress.

He wanted to reply with something equally raunchy but it suddenly occurred to his sensory-overloaded and completely-melted brain that what she said wasn't dirty or sexy or even remotely linked to what he was trying to do to her.

"What?" He murmured in confusion while continuing to plaster opened-mouth kisses on her collarbone.

"I asked if you told Lanie about the Tylenol that is in the side-pocket of Lizzy's bag," she repeated, her voice a little more steady.

"Uh..." Rick looked up at her for a moment and gave his head a brief shake. "-no." He went on to plant kisses on her jawline while his zealous hands moved down to try and haul up her dress. He was way too horny to have any coherent thoughts about anything else but a naked, moaning and arching Kate underneath or on top of him. In fact, he was _way _too horny to have a properly functioning (larger) brain. Kate, in contrast, was now struggling to keep her focus on what he was doing to her body. She bit her lip and frowned while he continued to ravish her. A battle was raging within - her mind yelling at her to call Lanie because her tiny human's health might be at stake (even though her babysitter was a qualified medical doctor) while her body screamed for release and some good lovin' only the man who currently had his oh-so-talented hands dangerously high on her thighs, could provide.

Mind and motherly concern eventually won.

Suddenly she sat up, pushing him away slightly. Rick, undeterred, moved back to capture her lips hungrily with his.

"Honey... Mmm... I..." she spoke in between moans, groans and mind-numbing kisses. "-have to-"

"Have to what, Baby?" He asked in a husky tone, again expecting her to say something sexy and maybe a little dirty. "Tell me."

"Mmm... call Lanie." With that she dragged her now-swollen lips away from his and slipped out from his embrace. He blinked a few times, licked his equally swollen lips and frowned in confusion while struggling to make sense of her words.

"W-what?" He asked as she stood up.

"I'm just quickly going to call Lanie and tell her about the Tylenol. I realised that I never told her where it was," Kate repeated while gingerly running a hand through her tousled hair and glancing around for her purse.

He was a little dumb-founded. "_Now_? You want to call her _now_?" _Now_ when he had his tongue down her throat and his hand up her dress. _Now _when the defining part of his male anatomy was throbbing almost painfully. _Now_ when all he could think about was ripping off her clothes and taking her on the couch. She had to this _now_? His mind and body (especially Rick Jr.) were protesting loudly, _very_ loudly.

Kate briefly glanced at him and nodded. "Mmm-hmm."

"Uh, Honey," Rick started with a thin smile, getting up. "-it's eleven-thirty." _'And we're kinda in the middle of something here,' _he added in his mind.

"So?" she replied with a shrug, searching for her phone.

"They're probably asleep by now."

"I'll be quick," she said without looking at him, already scrolling down her contacts list.

He decided to use another tactic. "We'll call them first thing tomorrow morning," he coaxed, flashing his typical Rick Castle smile as he loosely wrapped his arms around her waist. "Now c'mon, Mrs. Castle, let's take this party upstairs."

She looked up at him, unfazed. "I won't be long. I promise. I just want to make sure everything's fine and that her fever hasn't returned. _And_ that Lanie knows about the Tylenol."

Rick clenched his jaw in frustration and slowly let out a breath.

"I already called to make sure that everything was fine, remember?"

"I know... I just-"

"You just what, Kate?" He cut her off sharply. He dropped his arms and rubbed a hand over his face, slightly turning away from her. "I already told you that she was _fine_, that she was sleeping," he reiterated, frustration seeping into his tone. "I _just _spoke to Lanie, barely forty minutes ago."

"I know you did."

"Then why don't you believe me when I tell you that everything is perfectly fine?"

"I do believe you!"

"Okay, so what's the problem then?" He asked, folding his arms. She looked at him in silence for a few moments before sighing and dropping her head. She didn't have an explanation, at least not a rational one. She just needed to hear Lanie's reassuarances with her own ears. And maybe even get some photographical evidence that her daughter was indeed perfectly fine and sound asleep.

Rick's expression cleared in understanding upon seeing her reaction: _he_ spoke to Lanie, she didn't. _He_ was assured of their daughter's wellbeing, she wasn't. And _that_ was the problem. '_This must have been in the back of her mind the whole time,'_ he thought. He couldn't help but smile a little at his wife's motherly concern and protectiveness. And he felt a tug at his heart strings because of it.

Gosh, he loved this woman.

Unfortunately, her motherly instincts had atrocious timing - he was about ready to explode with arousal. But whatever she needed, he was willing to sacrifice for.

It was his turn to sigh, knowing full well that his next words would be considered traitorous by Rick Jr. He stepped forward and took hold of her shoulders, gently rubbing his hands up and down her arms. "Look, Honey, if you feel that you _have_ to talk to her for your own peace of mind, then go ahead." His voice was soft and reassuring. "I'll be waiting in my office." With a kiss to her forehead, he turned and walked away, silently cursing the tightness of his pants.

Yep, Rick Jr. was protesting. _Very_. _Loudly_.

Kate looked at her phone for a moment, debating whether or not to call. Again, motherly concern outweighed all other considerations and she pressed the call button.

* * *

"Everything's fine," she announced quietly. A less wound-up Rick turned to look at his wife from his position at the window and offered a soft smile.

"That's good... And the Tylenol?" He asked walking to where she was standing.

Kate bit her lip and avoided his eyes, seemingly feeling a little sheepish. "She found it, but it was not needed - Lizzy doesn't have a fever." Rick bit back his 'I told you so'.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. "What did she say about you calling?"

Kate locked her arms around his neck, offered him a lopsided smile and shook her head. "Well, she wasn't surprised. But she did scold me."

His brow furrowed. "Why?"

"Because I was busy talking to her rather than having my hands down your pants."

He threw his head back and laughed. Yeah that was Lanie alright. "Did you tell her that at least I had my hands up your dress?" He asked in a lowered tone, waggling his eyebrows. She rolled her eyes and chuckled while playfully slapping his chest.

"No, she would have bitten my head off if she knew _that_!"

He watched her for a moment, idly playing with a lock of her hair. "You feel better?"

Kate took a breath and nodded slowly. "Yeah... a little." She paused for a moment, bringing her hands to his chest. "I'm sorry for being... so-" She frowned, struggling to find the right word.

"-worried?" He finished for her. She smiled faintly and nodded.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to apologize for that. For feeling protective towards your child. For reacting like this." He gently cupped her cheek. "You don't have to apologize to me or anyone else for being a mother, okay?" She nodded again, but lowered her eyes to her hands on his chest.

"I know, but-" She bit her lip, wishing away the sudden emotion threatening to overwhelm her. "-am I a _good_ mother?" Her tone was unsure and vulnerable. "I mean I left her alone for a whole night and it's killing me."

He laughed softly and kissed her forehead.

"I think that alone proves that you are, indeed, a fantastic mother... You were made for this, Kate." He leaned in to give her another comforting kiss. "And, Honey, what you're feeling right now is perfectly normal. I promise."

She smiled at him and leaned up to kiss him. "Thank you... for be so patient with me."

"Hey, I love you even more now that you're a mom. If that's even possible. Besides, I intend to make you the mother of many more babies." She laughed and shook her head. "In fact, Mrs. Castle, I believe practise makes perfect," he said with a teasing grin.

She bit her lip and returned a sly smile. "I believe it does, Mr. Castle... But first, would you mind terribly helping me out of this dress?"

His impish grin grew. "Not at all, m'lady. It would be my absolute pleasure."

"Well then, let's take this party upstairs... _Big Rick_."

He smiled wickedly. "I love it when you talk dirty."

* * *

Images of the last few hours' events flashed through his mind as he drifted in between consciousness and unconsciousness.

_Three rounds._

They had three rounds of limb-numbing, mind-blowing and, more importantly, _uninterrupted_ sex. The first round was slow, sensual and gentle - truly an exercise in lovemaking. The second round, in contrast, was rough, back-to-front, bent-over, bed-breaking (which they actually did), dirty-talking, screaming-your-lover's-name-in-ecstacy kinda sex. The kind of sex you can't have with a four-month old - or anyone else for that matter - in the house. The third round, which only ended about thirty minutes ago, was one that involved teasing foreplay, a lot of laughter... and multiple orgasms.

He turned onto his side and reached for his partner-in-crime. But instead of finding his very naked wife, he found a cold mattress.

He did, however, find his leggy lover in the kitchen - in his shirt and nothing else. (Was that a tightening in his groin again? You betcha.) Kate was making breakfast - pancakes to be exact - and humming cheefully. He smiled and walked towards her - in a pair of silky boxers and nothing else.

"What are you doing, KC?" He asked, tightly wrapping his arms around his wife's middle from behind. She startled slightly but then relaxed into his embrace.

"Breakfast," she answered, continuing with her activities.

"Oh? Why? I thought we were going out for breakfast," Rick said, pressing a kiss to the side of her neck.

She turned in his arms, smiled and bit her lip enticingly. (There was that tightening down south again.) "_Weelll_, I just wanted to say thank you. So. Much. For. Last. Night." She emphasized each word with a kiss. "Or rather this morning."

"No Mrs. Castle, _thank you_," he replied with a knowing grin. He pressed a kiss to her lips which quickly escalated into a moan-inducing make-out session with her being backed up against the kitchen counter.

Kate reluctantly broke away. "Sorry Sweetheart, but I'm already struggling to walk... You kinda wore me out." She patted his cheek and smiled at him. He shrugged and placed a sweet kiss in her hair.

She turned back to the pancakes while he took a seat at the kitchen counter. "So, how late are we picking up Lizzy?" Rick asked after a few moments of staring at his wife (more specifically her impossibly long legs).

He was starting to miss his little girl terribly. A night of great sex was well great, but strangely it didn't beat cradling his baby girl or reading to her or watching her sleep.

"Missing her, huh?"

"Like crazy."

She sighed."Me too. Lanie said we could pick her up at 9h00."

He frowned. "_Nine_? But that's an hour and a half away," Rick whined with a disappointed pout. She smiled - her back turned to him - and nodded.

"I know, I know... Lanie and Esposito, however, are holding our adorable daughter hostage and nothing I say will change their minds. So, I'm just trying to make this hour and a half go by quicker."

"By making pancakes?"

"Exactly."

A devilish grin pulled his lips upward. "We could always kill time by-"

"No," was her firm response.

His brow furrowed. "But you don't even know-"

"We're _not_ having shower sex," she interrupted, reading his mind.

"Why not?" He immediately whined in protest.

She turned around and raised a perfectly sculptured eyebrow. "One, we've had three rounds already and two, I _just_ told you-"

"Oh, right. Struggling to walk. Sorry," he responded like a kid whose balloon just deflated. His expression, however, quickly lit up again. "It really was that good, huh?"

Kate only rolled her eyes and smiled.

_'You have no idea.'_

* * *

Lizzy let out a squeal of delight upon seeing her parents. Her parents almost did the same upon seeing their little girl.

"Hey Honey, hey baby girl," Kate cooed with a brilliant smile as she took her daughter from the petite ME. She tightly hugged the little body to her and kissed her head. "I missed you _so_ much," Kate whispered, tenderly running a hand over her daughter's head.

"She's was so good, Mommy," Lanie said, taking Lizzy's miniature hand in hers and kissing it lightly. "We had a blast! Didn't we, cutie pie?" Lizzy smiled and gurgled as she looked at her godmother.

"Did you now, Sweet Pea?" Rick stepped in behind his wife. When she saw her father, Lizzy started to giggle and excitedly throwing her tiny arms around. Rick chuckled and kissed her fat little cheek. "I missed you too, baby."

"Girl, you and Castle seriously make the most adorable babies," Lanie commented with a grin and then without missing a beat, she added, rather seriously: "When are we getting another one?"

Kate laughed a little nervously, catching her husband's twinkling eye.

"Yes, KC, when _are_ we getting another one?" Rick teased, playing along. He was only pulling her pigtails; they hadn't really discussed it, but there was an unspoken agreement that they would wait a few years before starting on a sibling for their daughter.

The smile immediately dropped from Kate's face. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down there. This one-" She pointed to Lizzy, who was now fascinated with her mother's necklace. "-is more than enough right now." She instead opted to change the subject and put some of the heat on her friend.

"Besides, Lanie, I'd say it's your and Esposito's turn next." The smirk fell from the ME's lips.

"Turn for what?" The burly detective enquired as he joined the group after retrieving one of Lizzy's bottles. He handed the baby bag (and Snuggles) to Rick and turned his attention back to the two women, while draping an arm around his fiancé's shoulders.

"Oh you know, your turn to have a baby," Kate said casually. Her colleague visibly stiffened, his face paled and and his eyes grew wide.

Rick patted his friend shoulder and smiled widely. "So Esposito, how was the diaper-duty?"

As if on cue, the cute little culprit shrieked happily while the tough Hispanic detective's mind replayed the horror that was Lizzy Castle's diapers.

He was scarred. _For_. _Life_.

_X-X-X_

_Can't explain all the feelings that you're making me feel  
My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel_

_Touching you, touching me_  
_touching you, god you're touching me_

_I believe in a thing called love_  
_Just listen to the rhythm of my heart_  
_There's a chance we could make it now_  
_We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down_  
_I believe in a thing called love_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so there it is. Uh, I really don't know about this, it kinda took on a life of its own. I'm especially unsure about the last two parts. Anyway, it is what it is. And I hope it's at least decent. I hope it's still in character and realistic.**

**Please review and tell me what you think! Again, thanks for reading.**

**I apologize for any grammar and/or spelling mistakes (it's like two in the morning).**

**Lyrics at the end is from the song (and title of this chapter) 'I believe in a thing called love' by the Darkness. Such a feel-good song, love it!**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Yay, I'm back! After another month or so (geez where's the time gone?), I'm able to update my beloved story. I may be able to update more regularly now 'cause I have more time on my hands. Now this chapter is a little sad and maybe morbid, but given the mood of the finale (which by the way blew my mind and was utterly, breathtakingly and heartbreakingly beautiful) I'm going with something that kinda fit in with that mood. It kinda just came to me today.**

**Okay, I just have to say something about 'Knockout' - wow, wow, wow, wow... and wow. I freakin' loved it! Especially the last 20 seconds or so - I've been watching it over and over and over and will probably be doing so until September. It's gonna be a verrrrryyyy long wait. Stana Katic - you deserve an Emmy; brilliant.**

**Anyway, on with the story. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Lizzy is mine. Rick and Kate are not. Kapish?**

* * *

**Chapter 25 – Flowers for a Ghost**

He was having a particular pleasurable dream - one that included moments of three of his favourite girls.

For the first few seconds (or minutes) of his dream state, he was playing in the park with a six or seven-year old spitting-image-of-Kate Lizzy who giggled and squealed in delight as he chased her and attacked her with a barrage of tickling. In the next instance, he was proudly attending Alexis' graduation as she passed her degree _cum laude_ while she still had no plans for getting married – he was always pleased with that. The most vivid and usually the best dreamy moments, however, always included and mostly revolved around his muse. In the fantasy his mind was currently conjuring up, Kate (dressed in _only_ his favourite stringy red bikini) was running ahead of him on the sandy beach behind their Hamptons home, throwing a carefree and utterly beautiful laugh over her shoulder. He faintly smiled and snuggled closer to the slender, warm body pressed against him.

He was about to get to the part where she (teasingly) undid the straps of the red bikini top when a sudden and painful jab to his ribs startled him awake. He scarcely had time to process what was happening when he felt a forceful kick to his shin and before he could protest, a foot connected with the one place he never wanted a foot to connect with. _Ever_. He winced and immediately let go of her fighting form and turned onto his back, pulled up his legs and took a moment to hiss a few expletives under his breath. A muffled sob, however, brought his attention back to his wife who was still struggling against some unseen enemy.

She was having a nightmare - the same one that haunted her over the years. It had become less and less frequent, but it was still there like a shadow in her mind. A demon that could not be exorcised. It didn't matter that he was there with her. It didn't matter that she was happy. It didn't matter that she had made peace with it.

It still haunted her.

Rick turned back towards her, took hold of her shoulders and gently jostled her, attempting to wake her.

"Kate... _Katie_," he pleaded softly. Rick had learnt over the years not to try and violently shake her out of it - a broken nose and busted lip were proof of that. She continued to moan and whimper, her face contorting in obvious distress.

"Kate," he said more forcefully while giving her a more insistent shake. Her eyes snapped open and after a frantic search in the moonlit dark, finally met his. Her first reaction was to tense and pull away from his hold. She was breathing hard and sweat was slowly trickling down her temple. Her throat was constricting and her eyes burned with tears.

"Hey, shhh... shhh. It's okay, it's okay," he soothed, pressing his forehead against hers. Rick gently framed her face and planted a few tender kisses in her hair. After a few moments, she abruptly pulled away, threw off the covers and got up.

He reached out for her. "Kate-"

"Just give me a minute," she snapped quietly, her voice hoarse and her back turned to him. A light suddenly went on, dimly illuminating their room. Rick threw off the covers and got up.

"Honey." Before he could reach his wife, she turned around and held up a hand to stop him.

Her jaw was set, but her voice shaky. "No. Please... just-" She dropped her hand and sighed. "-not now." With that Kate turned and walked out of their room. She left him staring after her - this was something that she had to deal with. Rick sighed and rubbed a hand over his face and pulled it through his hair.

She wasn't good at letting someone help carry her load. And he had made peace with the fact that they were taking baby steps to get her to let him shoulder some of her burdens, to help fight her personal demons. They still had a long road to go.

He let out a breath and got back in bed, waiting for her to return.

Waiting...

Always waiting.

[] [] []

Her small, toothless mouth was slightly agape - an indication that she was sound asleep. Her tiny chest was rhythimcally rising and falling - a sign that she was dreaming peacefully. Lizzy was lying on her back with Snuggles close to her side, her plump arms on either side of her adorably little face - completely oblivious that her troubled guardian was keeping watch over her.

Kate lightly traced a finger over her daughter's rosy cheek and smiled faintly, her eyes suddenly welling.

She found comfort here.

She found peace here.

She found salvation here.

All this in the little life that she cherished, the little person that she has come to love with every single breath she took and with every beat of her own broken heart.

"Hey baby girl." Lizzy started to wriggle, but soon relaxed and let out a sigh of contentment. Kate smiled. "I love you so, _so_ much. You know that right?" She paused for a moment, her throat burning and her vision becoming blurry. "And Mommy's going to be here to watch over you. Always. I promise." A few hot droplets trickled over the threshold of her eyes. "I _promise_ Sweetheart," she whispered with tenacious conviction. Kate knew that she couldn't promise that. It was the one thing she could _not_ promise - she couldn't guarantee that she would always be there for her daughter. She was painfully aware of that harsh reality.

However, despite her own agonizing encounter with loss, she wanted to promise her daughter, guarantee her that her mother would be there for all the important and even the mundane little things. All the painful, beautiful, precious moments that she never got to experience with her own mother.

Feeling the shadows that haunted her mind retracting for the time being, she let out a breath, bent down and sweetly kissed her daughter's head.

"I love you."

[] [] []

She found him resting against the headboard, duvet over his legs, hands in his lap, sexy five o'clock stubble on his face, hair cutely ruffled and eyes closed. He wasn't sleeping. He was waiting for her; her partner, friend, lover for life was waiting for her.

Loyal. Patient. _Worried_.

Rick opened his eyes when he felt the bed shift slightly. His arms automatically opened, inviting her into his warmth. She gladly accepted.

Finally with her head resting against his chest (his heartbeat drumming soothingly in her ear), his arm around her and a few comforting kisses in her hair, Kate let out the breath she'd been holding. He was stroking her back languidly as they lay in silence - he didn't push her, he never did. He made that mistake once and it caused a nasty spat that led to one of the crappiest (and loneliest) weeks of his life. He had learned to be patient with her, to be patient _for_ her.

"It was different this time." Her voice was soft, small and so unlike the woman he knew. Rick turned to look at her face and frowned; she didn't meet his eyes, but rather stared absent-mindedly at the strange shadows against the wall.

"Different?" He prodded gently, his hand never seizing its calming ministrations on her back.

She took a breath and briefly closed her eyes. When she spoke, her voice was a quiet, unsteady whisper. "I saw her... in the alley like always. I saw him too... saw him stalking her." She paused for a moment. "Saw him getting closer. I yelled, but she... she didn't hear me. It- I-" She choked back a sob. "I, I couldn't stop him. I was too late, again, Rick. Like always." He pulled her closer, already feeling a warm, moist patch forming on his shirt where her head was resting over his heart. He could see the streaks of tears rolling down her face - distraught, inconsolable tears. His vision became blurry. His heart broke like this every time hers broke.

He _hated_ this. Absolutely _hated_ the fact that he couldn't protect her from feeling this way. He _hated_ his own helplessness.

He was cradling her, both arms wrapped protectively around her smaller, trembling body as she continued to quietly give in to the grief and the loss and the pain. "Shhh... I'm sorry, Katie. I'm so sorry." His voice was raspy with emotion. After a few moments, Kate wiped at her eyes and slightly shifted her head to meet his eyes.

She wasn't finished.

"When I got to her, it wasn't my mother lying there... dying." She paused again, eyes welling up again. "It was me."

His jaw clenched and his stomach churned. Rick instinctively pulled her closer and pressed a hard, lingering kiss on top of her head. They were quiet for a while before she spoke again, her voice vulnerable.

"I just... I don't want to put Lizzy-"

His head snapped down to look at her. "Hey, look at me," he cut her off and gently grasped her chin. "Don't ever, _ever _talk like that."

"But-"

"No, Kate." His voice was firm and insisting and laced with a certain fiery conviction. His blue eyes flashed heatedly. He knew that there was always a chance - in the line of fire - that she wouldn't come home one day. He knew what was at stake, but it didn't mean that he wanted her to think or to talk like that because it was no way to live a full, happy life.

She sighed. Deciding that she didn't want him to share in her fear just yet, she relented. After a few silent, contemplative moments she spoke again. "I want us to go see her tomorrow."

Rick nodded in perfect understanding, bent down and kissed her tenderly. "Okay... Whatever you need, Love." He engulfed her in his arms and rested his stubbly cheek on top of her head. "Whatever you need."

He meant it.

He always did.

[] [] []

The sun was shining, the grass was green, the sky was blue and the air was crisp. Everything in nature as it should be. However, for her things always felt out of sync here. It felt strange to see life bloom where death resided. It didn't make sense. Life in a place of death just didn't make sense.

Kate was grasping her husband's arm tightly as he pushed the stroller, their daughter curiously glancing around - still blissfully ignorant about what this visit really meant. They reached the black, marble headstone, not too different from the others around it. It always shocked her - her mother's name carved into the black stone seemed so alien, yet it made it real; it was a manifestation of the stark reality.

They stood in silence for a moment, the only sound Lizzy's happy and unintelligible babbling. Kate let go of Rick's arm, walked a few steps, bent down and placed the bouquet of white roses (as per usual) on her mother's grave and lingered there.

"Hey Mom," she whispered, gently tracing the carved-out letters of her mother's name. Rick swallowed past the lump in his throat watching her reverence and longing. It was tragic, but absolutely poignant and his writer's mind could not help but appreciate the beauty of the moment. After a few moments, Kate stood up (after wiping her eyes) and picked up her daughter from the stroller before turning to her husband and holding out a hand. He wrapped it in his larger one and stepped closer, but didn't say anything. He never did.

He was stoic and silent, respectful of the bond between mother and daughter. A relationship, a bond - to his regret - he never got to see.

"Mom, this is Elizabeth Johanna Castle. Your adorable granddaughter who is a whole six months old next week." She spoke with affection and unmistakeable pride. Kate grinned and looked at her baby girl who's attention was on her mother's face, a tiny hand plastered against her mother's cheek. "Lizzy, this is your other grandmother," she whispered to her daughter, smiling despite the tears pooling in her eyes. "Don't forget about her, okay baby? Please don't forget about her." Her voice broke as the tears started to flow freely. She felt his strong arm wrap around her shoulders and pulling her closer to him, letting her head rest on his shoulder; letting her grieve with him, with _them_.

She knew that her mother wasn't here. Johanna Beckett wasn't in the black marble stone, she wasn't in the carved-out letters, she wasn't in the earth. She was in her daughter and in her granddaughter. But for Kate, her mother was also in the remembrance, the acknowledgement of her life and her legacy.

A life and a legacy her daughter would know about.

[] [] []

_Later..._

"Mission accomplished," Rick announced relieved as he stepped off the last stair. Kate looked up at him and smiled broadly.

"She asleep?" She was sitting cross-legged on the ground amidst various photo albums. She was dressed in a comfortable pair of old, worn out (ass-hugging) jeans and a simple white t-shirt, hair down and barefoot. In her husband's eyes she was incredibly sexy being all barefoot and domestic in those ass-hugging jeans and simple white t-shirt.

He plopped down onto the couch next to where she was sitting on the ground. "Yeah... _finally_." He threw his head back onto the back of the couch and let out a breath, briefly closing his eyes.

Kate pushed herself off the ground and onto the couch next to him. "Uh-huh. See? I told you. It's much more difficult to get her to sleep if you tamper with her routine... _Daddy_," she said with a knowing smirk as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"But we had a good time! She needs to have some fun with her old man before she grows up and goes off to college," he grumbled with a pout. Kate laughed and shook her head.

"Castle, she's not even six months old."

"Yeah well, she's growing up too fast already," he mumbled unhappily, his brow furrowing. His features however quickly lit up. "Did you see how she followed the helicopter around? She knew exactly where it was," he beamed proudly with a broad smile. Kate smiled and rolled her eyes in amusement before bending down and picking up some of the photo albums off the ground. "It's official KC - our kid is a genius."

"Well, she must get that from me then. No way you can label a nine-year-old-on-a-sugar-rush a _genius_," she teased good naturedly. He narrowed his eyes at her before smiling slyly.

"At least she's got my looks," he shot back.

"Oh puhlease, Writer Boy. For all you know she could be the milk man's daughter."

"We don't have a milk man." He grinned at her, self-satisfied. "C'mon, KC, just admit that there's at least some parts of our beautiful daughter that can be traced back to your ruggedly handsome husband."

"Shut up," she stubbornly replied with a grin before kissing him deeply. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back with him against the back of the couch.

"What are you looking at?" He asked after a few moments, noticing the various photo albums strewn around.

"Just some pictures. You, me, Lex. A few with your mother and my dad." She turned to look at him. "I also found a few of my mom."

"Let me see," he said gently. He already saw all the pictures with Johanna Beckett in them, but each time he saw something different, each time he found a different story in the images.

"She was beautiful, Kate," Rick commented quietly as he looked at the pictures of Johanna Beckett with her family.

"Yeah... she was," she replied with a small, sentimental smile.

He turned to look at his wife who was focused on the pictures he had in his hand. "You look like her." She looked up at him. "Just as beautiful. Inside and out," he continued sincerely. He bent down and pressed a sweet kiss against the corner of her mouth.

"You're such a cheeseball sometimes, Castle."

_'Thank you for being there. For having my back.'_

He smiled at her warmly. "But you love me for it."

_'Always.'_

She kissed him again. "Yeah... yes I do. A lot."

"Feeling's mutual."

{} {} {}

_Who will bring me flowers when it's over? _

_And who will give me comfort when it's cold?_

_Who will I belong to when the day just won't give in?_

_And who will tell me how it ends and how it all begins?_

_Don't ever say goodbye._

* * *

**A/N: I enjoyed writing this, I like exploring Kate's grief and how Rick helps her deal with it. I hope it was good. **

**Please, please review and tell me what you think. **

**I apologize for any grammar and spelling mistakes.**

**P.S. the title is a stunning song from Thriving Ivory and the lyrics at the end is from that song. I love it (as those who have read 'Flowers for a Ghost' probably can deduct).**

**Thank you for reading.**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews - this story has passed the 400 review mark and the 100 000 hits! Yay! That's incredible! Thank for every single person who took the time to read and review so far; it's you guys who fuel this story.**

**Now this chapter has been in mind for a while and is lighter than the previous one and is quite long (over 5000 words). It also includes Jim Beckett and some of the other characters. **

**Disclaimer: Alas, they do not belong to me. Well, except adorable Baby Castle.**

* * *

**Chapter 26 – Take me out to the ball game**

"Castle, we are _not_ getting a puppy!" Kate said in exasperation. For the last fifteen minutes she and her man-child husband have been _debating _(read: he whining, she admonishing) the issue of adding a pet to their home. And yes, Kate had pointed out that Rick was already like an animal to which he leered at her suggestively, waggling his eyebrows.

She only rolled her eyes. Walked right into that one...

They were strolling hand-in-hand, pushing past the hordes of people as they made their to the legendary Yankee stadium. Baby Lizzy was safely tucked against her daddy's chest in a carrier attached to him, watching the world curiously and occasionally clapping her small hands together in excitement. She was wearing a cute pair of jeans with ladybugs on them, a tiny white shirt that had _'I'm cute and I know it' _written on it in red, cursive letters, a pair of adorable Nike sneakers (Rick's idea of course) and a small blue Yankees cap – a smaller replica of the one her mother was wearing. Kate was casually dressed in a dark pair of skinny jeans, a gray, form-fitting t-shirt, sneakers and a blue Yankees cap, a pair of paparazzi-fooling sunglasses while her hair fell freely over her shoulders. The baby bag - with Snuggles in it - was slung over her shoulder. Rick was dressed in a crisp, white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a pair of light blue jeans (his wife had to resist the urge to grope him indecently in public whenever he was wearing them; in private it was a whole different ball game), a pair of paparazzi-fooling sunglasses and a red Yankees cap.

"But why not?" He was whining… _again_. She sighed heavily, dropped her head and pinched the bridge of her nose between her forefinger and thumb.

"_Because_… we just can't." She turned to look at him. "We live in a loft, Rick. A _loft_."

"So?" He shrugged.

"So, how are going to handle a puppy in an apartment? There's no backyard or garden or anything."

"I'll take him for walks," he replied instantly with innocent sincerity.

Kate rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Yeah, _right_... Correction, _I'll _be taking him for walks, _I'll _be feeding him, _I'll _be cleaning up after him. _You_-" she poked him on the shoulder with her free hand. _"-_will only play with him."

"Nah-uh." There's the nine year-old again.

"Yeah-uh," she shot back. He sighed dejectedly. Just then, Lizzy shrieked happily in an effort to get her parents' attention. At six months old, she was now in the social butterfly/centre-of-attention-phase - much to the amusement, entertainment and delight of her two biggest fans. Sometimes they would have competitions to see who gets her to smile first or laugh the most. Obviously, normal adult behaviour and coherent language flies out the door when you have an impossibly cute, chubby-cheeked little baby giggling because of your attention.

It was the best kind of addiction.

"See? She agrees with me," Kate quickly pointed out.

"Nah-uh. She'll _love_ having a furry friend." He turned his attention to the small, plump bundle against his chest. "Won't you, Sweet Pea?" Lizzy turned her head slightly and grinned toothlessly at her father, kicking her tiny legs enthusiastically. '_Like father, like daughter'_, Kate thought, amused.

He grinned back at his baby girl and then looked at his wife. "See? She likes the idea."

"Castle, do you remember what happened to Bubbles and Nemo?" The smile instantly fell from his face. "Yeah, thought so."

They got Bubbles and Nemo (due to his puppy-dog eyes and earnest promises to look after them) - two gold fish - a couple of months after they were married. Unfortunately, a few weeks later Bubbles and Nemo made their journey down to the sewers of New York City.

Turns out remembering to feed fish was not so easy task.

"But he or she won't be a boring fish who only swims around in a bowl... You'll also like - no _love _- a dog, KC. I know it. Your heart will completely melt if I show you the little Jack Russels I saw at the pet shop the other day," he continued to argue, by now removing his sunglasses. He knew that his eyes were her downfall. Now if he could just get that puppy-dog look right, he'll be able to turn her to complete mush.

She gave him a pointed look, despite feeling a tiny bit of her resolve being chipped away. _'Stand strong, Kate.' _"No."

The puppy-dog eyes were back in full force. _'Damn it! Don't break. Just hold firm. Just hold firm, Katie... He's not _that _adorable.' _She steeled herself. "And don't even bother giving me _that_ look, Castle. It's not working this time." Kate was doing a little internal happy-dance at _not_ giving in to his vast array of charms. Well, not this time at least.

With that (along with a disappointed pout from her husband) the discussion was ended - for the time being.

"Must be a cat person," he mumbled sourly. Kate bit her lip and struggled to suppress a grin; he was ridiculously cute (and exhausting) being this childlike.

But just like an ADD kid, his mind quickly shifted to another topic as they reached one of the gates. "Hey, so your dad's bringing someone?"

Kate smiled broadly at the young ticket collector as she handed their tickets to him and then turned back to her husband. Rick noticed the poor schmuck's slack-jawed expression and stupid grin - she had that affect on people, in particular men. His mouth curved up, feeling a stab of pride at the fact that she was his and suddenly had the urge to kiss her senseless just to prove it. Damn it! That form-fitting t-shirt, tight pair of jeans and sexy little smile were going to be the end of him.

"Uh, yeah. He's bringing a friend - a Cameron or someone," she replied with a slight frown as they made their way through the gate.

"Oh." Rick's brow furrowed. Jim had never brought someone with him on baseball Saturdays before. Strange. "Who's that?"

Kate shrugged as she laced her fingers with his again. "Dunno. Probably a friend from work, I assume. He didn't say much. Just asked whether he could bring a friend along."

[] [] []

"Well, well, _well_. If it isn't the Boston Red _Sucks_!" Rick heckled loudly with a cocky grin as the duo of Red Sox-fans approached.

"You gotta big mouth, _Stankee_. Remember what happened last time your mouth got too big?" Ryan hit back with a broad smile, proudly clad in a Red Sox top and an arm around his wife who was also clad in Red Sox colours.

It was baseball season.

It meant summer sunshine, hot dogs, Cracker Jack, home-runs, strike-outs, (mostly, _mostly_) friendly banter between rival fans, running into Joe _freakin'! _Torre, high-stakes bets and the best of all? Box seats courtesy of Richard Castle, Inc. Today it was the New York Yankees versus the Boston Red Sox. The Castles versus the Ryans. Javier and Lanie were sitting out for this one - they had a wedding to plan, mothers to satisfy and two hot-under-the-collar families to appease.

In short: they were trying to prevent World War Three from breaking out.

"Yeah well, the past is in the past, _Irish_. History doesn't count here. It's the battle on the day that matters, the titanic struggle between two arch nemeses. The sweat, the tears, the-" Rick mused dramatically.

His mother would have been proud.

"Yeah, yeah Writer Boy, we get the picture," Kate cut him off with a wide smile and a shake of her head as she walked passed him towards the Ryans. Shifting Lizzy to one arm, she gave Jenny a brief hug. "Hey Jen."

The petite blonde smiled in greeting. "Hi Kate." Her smile grew as she turned her attention to Lizzy. "Hey Sweetie. Oh, you are getting so big!" Kate looked at her daughter who was lapping up all the attention and smiled proudly.

"Yeah, she's growing up so fast."

"Much to her old man's dismay," Rick added, stepping in behind Kate, taking hold of his daughter's small hand and pressing a kiss against it.

"Hey Lizzy!" Ryan greeted his adopted niece with a grin. "Come to Uncle Kev." He took her from Kate and lifted her up in the air, much to the little girl's delight. He frowned in mock disgust when he spotted her little cap. "Ah no! What's this? Child abuse I'd say, Squirt." He smirked at the two adult Castles who were glaring with him. "Don't you worry Lizzy, we'll be amending this travesty. I promise." Lizzy took in her surrogate uncle's serious expression with fascinated wide eyes (the same blue eyes of her father) and a slightly agape little mouth.

"Ryan, hand over my kid before you brainwash her," Kate said in mock displeasure and with a raised eyebrow. Her colleague chuckled and handed Baby Castle over to her mother.

"So, where are the boys?" Rick asked as the four of them walked towards the seats just outside of the box.

"At my sister's for the weekend," Jenny answered, briefly glancing at her husband before adding: "We just needed a little time on our own, you know? It can get a little crazy."

The two Castles nodded in perfect understanding - they only had one little person (so far) and were struggling to juggle everything (includig a love life) while the two Ryans had two very busy, energetic, mischievous and ridiculously cute twin toddler boys of two-and-a-half: Colin and Liam. To complicate matters even more, both Kevin and Jenny were working full time. As a result, a chance to spend a few hours - not to mention a whole _weekend_ - on their own was jumped upon quicker than rabid dogs on a bone.

"I can only imagine," Kate murmured thoughtfully, focused on placing Lizzy's pacifier in her mouth.

Rick draped an arm around the back of his wife's seat. "You have our sympathies." His mouth curved up into a sly grin after a few moments. "Especially since you'll be losing today as well. And by losing I do mean getting your asses whipped!"

And with that, the two Ryans protested loudly leading to the first round of healthy bantering.

[][][]

_15 minutes later... _

"Oh come on Ryan, you know that's BS!" Kate argued with a short, disbelieving laugh. She and her colleague were having a friendly debate about the merits of their respective teams' pitchers. Before he could refute her claim, a voice interrupted them.

"What's BS?" Jim Beckett enquired with a broad smile as he walked towards them.

"Dad!" Kate exclaimed with a wide grin as she leapt up with Lizzy in her arms.

"Hi Katie," her father greeted, kissing her cheek and hugging her loosely. His whole face lit up upon seeing his granddaughter and for a moment, Jim Beckett completely forgot the world outside of Lizzy Castle.

"Hey Cupcake! Come to your Granpa!" He took Lizzy from Kate with a large grin. "Hi Rick," he greeted the father of his granddaughter absent-mindedly; all of his attention was focused on the little person who had her small hands on his cheeks and looking at him curiously.

Rick grinned and shook his head in amusement, draping an arm around his wife. "Hey Jim."

"Oh she is just adorable!" An unfamiliar female voice commented from behind Jim. A blonde, elegant and attractive middle-aged woman stepped in beside him.

Jim turned to look at the woman and then turned his attention back to Kate and Rick who were both sporting similar confused expressions. "Ah… Kate, Rick." He glanced at the woman again. "This is Cameron. Cameron Munroe." Kate's expression cleared, but remained neutral.

"Cam, this is my daughter, Kate, and my son-in-law, Richard."

"Pleased to meet you," Cameron responded politely, first shaking Rick's outstretched hand.

"Likewise," he responded with a charming smile. "I'm always happy to meet a beautiful woman." Cam placed a hand on her chest and laughed heartily before turning to the older man.

"Well, Jim you were right. He's a real charmer." Rick grinned back and immediately took a liking to this woman. "By the way, I'm a big fan your work," she added with a wink, causing the author's smile to grow even wider.

She turned her attention to Kate and smiled, carefully trying to gauge the younger woman's reaction. "It's such a pleasure to finally meet you, Kate. I've heard so much already. Your dad just cannot stop talking about you."

"Uh… I- Pleased to meet you too," Kate responded a little awkwardly as she shook the other woman's hand. She was still trying to process the fact that Cam wasn't a buddy from work, but rather looked more like her dad's date. "I hope you've only heard the good things," she recovered with a smile, glancing at her father.

The older woman let out a laugh. "Oh don't worry, it was only the goods things. I promise," she said looking at Jim with an expression that Kate knew well: unbridled affection.

"You don't trust your old man, Katie?" Jim Beckett grinned at his daughter, his eyes sparkling. _'He's happy,'_ the realisation dawned on Kate.

Her father was happy and it probably had a lot to do with the beaming woman standing in front of her.

A woman who wasn't her mother.

[] [] []

_Two hours later..._

"Shhh, baby. Oh, honey. Shhh... shhh," Kate tried to soothe her highly cranky and tired baby girl who was by now crying and struggling lethargically in her mother's arms. She was walking back and forth in the room, gently rocking her daughter - the sounds of the game outside, the noise of the large crowd and the others' animated chatter filtering through. She sighed. Bringing a baby to a baseball game with thousands of people screaming and the vast amount of stimuli was probably not such a good idea.

After a few minutes and with Lizzy finally (_finally!_) settling down, Kate's phone rang throwing her into a mild panic as she tried clumsily to reach for her blaring phone in her pocket.

"Here, give her to me," Cam said, suddenly appearing next to Kate and holding out her arms. The younger woman hesitated a moment before handing Lizzy over to the other woman and quickly pulling out her ringing phone. She was following Cam with her eyes the whole way before glancing at the caller ID.

It was Lanie. Calling in the middle of what was supposed to be a dress-fitting session. With her mother.

Not. Good.

"Hey Lanie-"

"Girl I'mma kill someone! Or end up in an asylum! Or both!" Lanie said in greeting. Yep, this sounded like an emergency. _Again_.

Kate had to bite the inside of her cheek to stop from bursting out in laughter. The last thing the fiery ME needed was her best friend's amused sniggering.

"Okay, what happened?" Kate enquired with a longsuffering sigh. She took a seat at the bar, knowing this could be a while. At the same time, she kept an eagle eye on her father's 'friend' who had her daughter.

For the next ten minutes Kate listened to Lanie rant, rave and vent. And swearing that she's going to cancel everything and just elope... to Las Vegas. _Again_. At one point in the very one-sided conversation, Jenny came by to get more drinks and upon hearing Kate's mono-syllibical reassurances, she frowned in question. Kate mouthed Lanie and rolled her eyes. The other woman just shook her head and smiled. The Parish-Esposito nuptials was a topic of frequent discussion... _and_ intervention.

After releasing all of her frustration, Lanie changed the subject. "So, how's your day going?"

Kate hesitated a moment, her eye catching Cam (with a sleeping! Lizzy in her arms) talking with the others. "Uh... good."

Her very astute friend, however, picked up on her hesitation. "Girl, I know that tone. What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"_Kaaaattee_."

"No, really nothing's the matter. We're having a great time. I mean the Yankees _are_ winning after all," she replied with a chuckle, trying to lighten her tone.

It didn't fool Lanie. "But?"

Kate sighed and made sure that everyone was still outside. "My dad brought a friend."

"So?" She could almost hear Lanie's shrug.

"It's a woman."

"Oh," Lanie replied carefully. "And? How is she?"

"She's..." Kate glanced at the woman in question who was currently laughing at something Rick was saying - he was now cradling their daughter. "She seems great, Lanie," she finally said with a sigh.

Her best friend was silent for a moment before speaking again. "But it bothers you."

Kate bit her lip and took a breath. "I don't know why, but somehow it does." She paused for a moment. "My dad seems happy, you know? _Really_ happy. I haven't seen him laugh this much since..." She trailed off, knowing her friend would follow her line of thinking.

"Ah Sweetie," Lanie breathed in understanding.

Kate let out a humourless laugh. "I'm just being silly, Lane-"

"No you're not. It's a pretty normal reaction, actually." She paused for a moment. "Besides, it seems like your dad kinda sprang this on you."

"Yeah, he did. We thought Cameron was a buddy - a _male_ buddy - from work. Turns out she's his... lady... friend."

Lanie laughed at the other end and shook her head. "How's Castle handling all this?"

Kate looked over to her husband who was still conversing animatedly, their sleeping daughter safely tucked in the bend of his arm. She smiled. "How do you think?"

"Probably charming her into oblivion."

"Yeah, but she's doing the same to _him_. He seems to like her."

"Not unnatural for Castle."

"No," Kate said absently biting her lip while her mind drifted to an array of potential future scenarios. Sunday afternoon lunches with her dad and _Cameron_, school recitals with her dad and _Cameron_, birthdays with her dad and _Cameron_, Thanksgivings and Christmases with her dad and _Cameron_. Everything significant moment and event with her dad and this woman.

A very nice woman. A very likeable woman. A woman who made her dad happy.

A woman who wasn't her mother.

"Kate-"

"Mmmm?"

"Do _you_ like her?"

She took a moment before replying, casting another look at her father and his companion. They were laughing.

"Yeah... yes, I do."

[] [] []

_That evening..._

After eating too many hot dogs, winning a bet against Ryan and taking his daughter to her first ball game (although she wasn't awake for most of it), Rick leaned back into the couch and sighed in satisfaction. Yep, all in all, it was a good day. A day that included a surprise or two, but nevertheless it was a good one. At least he thought so. Did Kate think so? He glanced at the stairs again waiting for their return. His two girls were taking a bath after their day of fun in the sun. His mouth curved up into a sentimental smile thinking about the first time Lizzy and Kate had taken a bath together - he had found mother and daughter squealing and giggling loudly amidst a sea of bubbles. He couldn't resist taking a picture. Obviously, _not_ one that he was allowed to show or even mention in public. _Ever_.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the soft tone of his wife's voice - she was whispering to their daughter as they approached him. She was cradling their baby girl protectively; her damp hair in a simple, messy bun while she was comfortably clad in a pair of shorts (revealing her long legs) and an old NYPD-shirt. She was motherly, domestic, feminine, sexy and stunning all at the same time. When she lifted her head, locked her eyes with his and flashed him that utterly beautiful, dazzling smile while still whispering to their daughter, Rick felt his heart slam against his chest at a rapidly increasing pace. He fell in love with her all over again. With _them_ all over again. With their life all over again.

Gosh, she was beautiful.

"Look, Honey, here's Daddy," Kate said softly as she sat down closely next to him, curling a leg underneath her.

"Come here, Sweet Pea," Rick said with a large grin, holding out his arms as Kate handed over Lizzy. She sighed and placed her elbow against the back of the couch while holding her head in her hand, watching father and daughter with a smile.

"Did you have a good time today? Are you also happy the Yankees won, baby?" Rick asked as he bounced his little girl on his lap. Lizzy shrieked happily when her father suddenly lifted her up in the air to hover just above his grinning face.

He brought her back down to his lap and turned to look at Kate. "And what about you Mommy? Did you also have a good time today?" He asked, subtly trying to gauge her feelings about the developments of the day. Kate smiled softly, her eyes on her daughter (who was now lying with her head against her father's shoulder and sucking on his shirt) while running a hand gently over her dark brown smattering of hair.

"Yes, _Daddy_, I did," she replied quietly, her focus still on Lizzy. She met his eyes and he could see a multitude of emotions emanating from them - affection, desire, contentment and a hint of sadness. He watched her for a moment before lifting his hand to cup her cheek, softly running a thumb over her cheekbone.

"You okay, Kate?" She sighed, briefly closed her eyes and placed her smaller hand on his larger one that was embracing her face delicately.

She opened her eyes again and cocked her head slightly. "Yeah, I'm fine... I promise." He removed his hand from her face and wrapped it around her slender one.

"Your dad-"

"-Is happy, Rick." She dropped her head and pursed her lips before returning her gaze to his. "And that's all that matters. Is all that should matter."

"So, you're okay with this. With him and Cameron?"

She momentarily tilted her head upwards and slowly blew out a breath. "Yeah... I am."

"He's in love with her, you realise that right?" Rick said softly. Jim Beckett had dated a few women in the past before, but nobody that he actually introduced to his daughter. Cameron Munroe was different. Rick wanted to make sure that she understood the situation. That she understood how serious her father was about this woman. That she understood what this meant.

She swallowed against the sudden lump in her throat. "I do," she whispered. "I saw the way he was looking at her. It's the same way he used to..." she trailed off and turned her head away, silently cursing the sudden tears stinging her eyes. She composed herself and looked at her husband again. "I'm happy for him. God knows I am. He deserves to love someone and to be loved in return. He deserves at least that, Rick. My dad was unhappy for a long time." He knew just how unhappy; Kate had told him of her dad's battle with alcoholism and how that almost ruined their relationship. "I haven't seen him this happy in ages." She swallowed again, the tears blurring her vision. "If she can make him happy, then... I'm happy."

He watched her for a long moment, their daughter fast asleep against his shoulder. "I think your mom is happy for him too. Wherever she is," he said gently. At that Kate let out a watery laugh and wiped her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm sure she is," she replied with a sad smile, her brow furrowing as she tried to fight off the stubborn tears flooding her eyes. "Wherever she is." He carefully shifted Lizzy to his other arm and pulled his wife into a comforting embrace, pressing a few kisses in her hair.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, watching their daughter sleep against her father's chest.

"I guess we have to get her to bed," Kate said sitting up. "It was quite the day."

"Yep, and hopefully one of many more. Isn't that right, Sweet Pea?" Rick planted a tender kiss in Lizzy's soft, dark hair. Before he got up, Kate cupped his face in between her hands.

She gave him a sweet kiss and leaned her forehead against his. "I love you, Richard Castle." He smiled and gave her another peck on the lips.

"I love you too, Katherine Castle." She rolled her eyes at the use of her given name.

"Don't call me Katherine," she warned, her tone laced with humour.

"But you called me Richard! I don't mind that." His brow furrowed for a moment. "Just don't ever call me Di-"

"Castle!"

"Okay, okay." His mouth curved up into a devilish grin. "My, my... don't you have a dirty mind, Detective. You do realise that I still have our daughter in my arms, right?"

Kate chewed on her lower lip and leaned in closer while enticingly tracing a finger across his chest.

"Castle, the sooner you get our adorable daughter to bed, the sooner you can get to all and I do mean a_ll... _my_..._ _bases_... Who knows? You might even _score_ a home run tonight."

As he practically ran back down the stairs after putting Lizzy to bed, Rick came to the conclusion that there was no greater American pastime than baseball.

Especially when you hit it out the park...

[] [] []

_If you were the wood, I'd be the fire._  
_If you were the love, I'd be the desire._  
_If you were a castle, I'd be your moat,_  
_And if you were an ocean, I'd learn to float._

_All I want is you, will you be my bride_  
_Take me by the hand and stand by my side_  
_All I want is you, will you stay with me?_  
_Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea._

* * *

**A/N: Well, this was quite a challenging chapter to write for me. There was so much going on and I really wanted to get the emotions right, again. I was going for funny and sweet - hopefully it lives up to expectation. I wanted to include more of Kevin and Jenny, but it just didn't work out that way. They will probably make an appearance later on again, just like Lanie and Esposito.**

**Again review and please let me know what you think. It's the reviews that fuel this story.**

**Thanks again for reading!**

**All mistakes are mine and I apologize for them.**

**P.S. Lyrics at the end are from Barry Louis Polisar's cute song "All I want is you." I thought it fit with the chapter. The title of this chapter is a famous baseball song performed by a multitude of artists over the years. **


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: This idea came to me after watching 'The Final Nail' again. I wanted to do something where Kate was the one for a change to provide some comfort. I always feel that it's the other way around in many stories. **

**Now, I was suppose to be writing a chapter on Zimbabwe for a book, but instead I found myself writing this... What can I say? *Shrugs*. I know my priorities. **

**Anyway, enjoy. It's nice and long.**

**Disclaimer. Only Lizzy belongs to me.**

* * *

**Chapter 27 - F. Scott Fitzgerald**

"Lizzy… Sweet Pea - come on now. You _have_ to eat this. I don't get it, you usually love it when Mommy gives this to you. Please do it for me." He sighed heavily and leaned down again. Feeding a seven month-old at 8am when you are barely awake yourself, isn't as much fun as you would think. Especially if you're a writer who was busy _writing_ until three in the morning. Kate was much better at doing this than he was. With him, it seemed like Lizzy was just trying to test him, to see how far she could push her father.

"You know you're mother is just gonna come in here anyway and give this stuff to you. So you might as well get it over with, Kiddo," Rick muttered as he tried once again to coax her into opening her mouth for the spoonful of oatmeal cereal. And again, she stubbornly refused, turning her head away. He followed her, trying desperately to gently force her small mouth open; smearing cereal across her chin and round little cheek. For the umpteenth time.

She was not happy with him and he was not happy with her.

He huffed and stood up. What now? He valiantly offered to give her breakfast while Kate took a shower... without him.

He let out a heavy sigh. Well Richard Castle wasn't about to give in that easily. Especially not against a miniature human being. An incredibly adorable, heart-melting miniature human being with his eyes, mind you.

"Elizabeth Johanna Castle, you are just as stubborn as your mother," he commented, bending towards her again with the dreaded spoon of oatmeal.

"Excuse me?" He jumped at the sound of his wife's voice.

Rick turned around and smiled at her sheepishly. "Ah… heeyyy, Honey. Did you enjoy your shower?" She was watching them from the edge of the stairs, wearing a pair of khaki shorts and a comfortable white t-shirt. Her still-damp hair hanging loosely around her shoulders. He had to resist the urge to throw her over his shoulder and carry her back upstairs... to bed.

She raised an eyebrow as she glanced at her oatmeal-smeared baby girl and then back to said baby girl's (rather irresistible) father who was sporting incredibly cute bed-hair, a sexy stubble and who was still clad in boxers and a navy sleep shirt. A form-fitting navy t-shirt. Underneath that form-fitting navy t-shirt was a really muscular, hard-

"Castle, did you get _any _of that in her mouth?"

He glanced back at his daughter, spoon still in hand. "Uh, guess not." He shrugged guiltily. "But it was all her fault," he quickly retorted like a petulant child, now pointing the spoon in Lizzy's direction. At the same time, both turned to look at her with twin pairs of cobalt blue eyes; each appealing to her for mercy. They were the picture of innonence.

Kate bit her lip in an effort not laugh at the sight. Her heart all but melted at the two's combined adorableness. Like father, like daughter. How was she _ever_ going to win against them? She was already dreading the days where they were going to team up against her with those similar puppy-dog expressions...

Yep, Kate Castle was doomed.

She shook her head with an amused smile and walked towards her husband. "You two are hopeless. Here, let me." He happily handed over the spoon. "In return for relieving you from this burden, I would like pancakes. Golden brown pancakes with strawberries and-"

"Cream?" He offered with a sly grin. Kate playfully slapped him on the chest and narrowed her eyes.

"_No_. Get your head out of the gutter. I would like mine with butter and syrup... Besides-" Her mouth curved up into a devilish grin. "-strawberries _and_ cream are strictly for _recreational_ purposes. You know - the kinky kind after 8pm. Adults only. No clothing."

His impish grin grew wider. "Oh, I know the kind very well. It's my favourite pastime." He stepped closer to her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Mmmm, mine too." They shared a lingering kiss before Lizzy's excited squeal broke the moment.

"Hey, do you mind? If it wasn't for that, you-" He pointed a finger at his little girl. "-wouldn't be here."

Kate threw her head back and laughed; the sound was musical and his breath caught because of it. After a moment, she looked at her husband again. Rick was staring at her smiling mouth with unbridled desire. Her stomach tightened because of it.

She cleared her throat and his eyes snapped back to hers. "Castle, those pancakes aren't going to make themselves. Now get going. I wanted it five minutes ago."

He grinned again and pulled her to him. "Whatever you want, Mrs. Castle. Whatever you want." He leaned down and pressed a sweet kiss against her mouth. "Do you know how incredibly hot you are and how it turns me on when you're being so demanding?" he said against her mouth, his grin widening.

She smiled. "Yeah and don't you forget it, Mr. Castle," she murmured before brushing her lips against his one last time. "Now stop distracting me so I can feed our daughter."

"Yes ma'am." He mock saluted her. She rolled her eyes.

She turned back to her baby girl and raised an eyebrow sternly.

"Alright, young lady, time to eat your breakfast." Lizzy giggled at her mother and Kate laughed as she bent over. "Oh no you don't. I see what you're doing. You're trying to charm your way out of this just like your father, aren't you?" She said smiling broadly at her daughter. Lizzy squealed and flopped her small arms around. "Well it's not working, Cupcake. It may work on Daddy-" she glanced up at her husband at the other end of the kitchen. He turned around and smiled at them. "-but not on me," she concluded, looking at her daughter once more. Lizzy was now gurgling (and drooling) while watching her mother with wide-eyed fascination.

Rick shook his head and turned back to his activities. Just as he was about to start on the pancakes, his phone rang. Kate let out a chuckle as he picked it up; he glanced at his wife and daughter as their laughter sang throughout the loft and smiled broadly.

Yeah, he was aware of it. He didn't need anyone telling him that Richard Castle was one lucky bastard. He knew that he was.

And honestly? If anyone asked, he really didn't do anything to deserve it.

Rick glanced down at his phone and frowned. It was an unknown number. He waited a moment before answering. "Hello?"

_"Good morning. Is this Richard Castle?"_

He watched as Kate made train noises and animatedly tried to convince their daughter to allow the oatmeal train to enter her mouth. It usually did the trick. "Yeah, the one and only." He smiled. The other person on the end of the line didn't laugh.

_"Mr. Castle, my name is Roger Calland. I'm Damian Westlake's attorney."_

At that, the smile dropped from his face. Kate, who happily glanced up at her husband, noticed the change in his demeanor and her brow furrowed.

_"I'm sorry to inform you, but Mr. Westlake has passed away."_

Rick slowly rocked back a few steps until his back hit the kitchen counter. For a moment, things felt a little fuzzy. A little distorted. A little upside down. He let out a shaky breath. "When?" His voice was quiet and rough. It alarmed Kate. She immediately stood up and walked a few steps towards her husband; he was pale and his eyes were as big as saucers.

_"Last evening."_

"What happened?" He rubbed a hand over his face and through his hair, eventually resting it against the back of his head. His disturbed eyes caught Kate's concerned ones, before it darted away from her.

_"He committed suicide."_

Rick turned around, briefly closed his eyes and dropped his hand against the counter. The only sounds that he was aware of were the ticking of the kitchen clock, Lizzy's happy babbling and the blood rushing in his ears.

"How?" His voice, raw with emotion, wavered slightly.

_"They found him this morning, hanging from the window bars... He used his sheets. It must have happened after lights out."_

Rick shook his head and swallowed. He could feel his throat starting to tighten and his eyes starting to sting. "Uh, why- why have you called _me_?"

There was a moment of silence at the other end. _"You were listed as the only next of kin, Mr. Castle_."

[][][]

"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you?" Kate asked, concern lacing her voice.

"Uh, no. I- I'll be fine," Rick responded distractedly while he put on his jacket. He seemed lost.

She saw it. The sadness, the regret... the guilt. She saw it in his eyes, read it in his whole expression. Felt it in his movements. She sighed and got up. Lizzy was playing at their feet on the rug. Rick was watching his daughter with a soft (and slightly sad) expression. He ignored his wife's penetrating gaze - she saw through his defenses and he didn't want her to read him like a book right now.

Kate smoothed a hand over his chest and fiddled with the collar of his jacket. When she spoke, her voice was soothing and gentle. "Rick, listen to me, you-"

He briefly shut his eyes and caught her hand in his. "No, please just don't right now." He reopened them and locked his cobalt pair with her olive counterparts. She wanted to protest, but he raised a hand to cut her off. "Please just... I can't hear that right now, okay?" He was struggling against the burning sensation in his throat. He was struggling against the tears. He was struggling against the reality.

She desperately wanted to contradict him, desperately wanted to tell him that he didn't have to feel the crushing guilt. It wasn't his fault. Damian Westlake's descent wasn't his fault. Richard Castle was a good man. Better than most. The best one she knew. By far.

But instead, she respected his request. She chewed on her lower lip and nodded her head, not trusting her voice as she felt her vision starting to blur. He was hurting, so she was hurting as well. When he bled, she bled. Whe he suffered, she suffered.

He pressed a tender kiss against her forehead, more for his comfort than hers. "I'll see you later," he mumbled hoarsely, his breath swirling in her hair. She nodded silently again and he released her.

When Rick reached the door, she spoke. "Hey..." He turned around. "I love you."

He smiled softly at his wife. The love of his life. Mother of his child. Inspiring muse. _Kate_. His Kate. "Love you too."

[][][]

_A few hours later..._

A box. One, single, pathetic box.

That was all that remained of Damian Westlake. It was rather sad that _this_ was what a man who sought wealth above all else had been left with.

Rick stared at the last of Damian's possessions for what felt like an eternity, glass of scotch in his hand and an old Edgewood Academy yearbook open on his lap. The focus of his attention, however, was on a small envelope. His name was scrawled across the slightly yellowing paper. It was a letter. Addressed to him. From his fallen hero. And it was lying on top of a pile of books (that included some of his as well)... and two handwritten manuscripts. Damian had written two 'books' while he was in prison. Rick felt a sense of... _pride - _for lack of a better word - that his old mentor had given the written word another chance.

A ghost of a smile crossed his features as he raised his glass in an unacknowledged salute to the manuscripts.

"Rest in peace," he said quietly before quickly throwing the liquor down his throat; the burning sensation making him shudder slightly and grimace.

He blew out a breath and sat back in his chair, his mind replaying fond memories of his time as a schoolboy. The smile that developed because of his nostalgia, however, faded slowly as the reality of Damian Westlake's end came back to him.

If only he had-

Just as the thought occurred to him, he heard the door to the loft open and the muffled sound of his wife's voice as she spoke to their daughter.

Rick glanced at his watch and then back at the bottle of scotch. He'd been back for almost an hour. How many glasses-

Oh.

Just three. Good.

He didn't want to be drunk in the middle of the day. Wifey wouldn't be too happy about that. Or maybe she would overlook it given the circumstances...

Nah, at first she'd grill his ass. And _then_ provide a shoulder to cry on.

He smiled slightly and stood up.

"You wanna play for a while, baby girl? Okay, let's put you down," Kate said as she lowered Lizzy into her playpen that was standing in the living room. They went to a see Dr. 'Little Humans' Montgomery today for a check up since Lizzy had started teething a few weeks before. And so far, so good.

Mommy and Daddy had their fingers crossed though... _Tightly_ crossed. Getting her into a sleeping pattern and having the semblance of a normal one for themselves had been hard enough.

"Ah! Look who I have here, Honey Bun!" Kate exclaimed, pulling Snuggles out from behind her back while her whole face lit up with a large smile. Lizzy squealed and clapped her hands in anticipation. She _never_ grew tired of Snuggles, her constant companion, closest friend and trusted confidant.

Rick was leaning - arms folded - against the doorframe of his study as he watched his wife; she was bent over the playpen (much to his appreciation), gently nuzzling Snuggles into Lizzy's tummy causing the seven month-old to giggle hysterically because of it. Kate was laughing brightly, beautifully, infectiously at her baby girl's little cackles of delight.

He smiled at the sound and idly wondered when they would start on another baby. If she was going to continue to be this incredibly adorable with their daughter, he really didn't want to waste another minute in getting her pregnant again. And why wait? He wanted life around him. Adventure. Happiness. Family...

But he was aware that this was either the booze or the grief talking.

Probably a little bit of both.

Kate was completely oblivious to anything outside of the bubble that enveloped her and her mini-me. She only became aware of Rick when she felt his warmth and smelled his cologne as he leaned over her; effectively engulfing her with his large presence.

"Hey," he said softly into her ear before placing a gentle kiss in her neck.

She turned her head slightly and offered him a tentative smile. "Hey." She watched him for a moment as he watched Lizzy. He didn't say anything. He didn't want to. Right now, he just wanted to be wrapped around his wife and watch his little girl play. He needed that. Needed _them_.

Contrary to popular belief, Richard Castle wasn't much of an emotional sharer. He was more so than Kate, but still not an easy person to get to open up. Right now, to the untrained eye, he seemed fine. On the surface his expression gave little away. However, she has made it her mission to study every line, every nuance, every detail and engrave them on the slates of her mind. They were worth a thousand words to her. He was an open book to her. And right now she could read that he was silently grieving.

And feeling guilty.

She left Snuggles in Lizzy's little groping hands and turned in his arms to fully face him. Rick was purposefully avoiding her gaze as he kept his eyes on Lizzy (now lying on her back with Snuggles on top of her while she frantically kicked her small legs in utter excitement). Only when Kate lightly traced a hand over his cheek did his eyes meet hers.

When she spoke, her voice was low and tender. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He watched her for a moment, his gaze slowly sweeping over her graceful features. It lingered on her slightly parted lips. Her soft, sensual, slightly parted lips. He didn't want to talk, he wanted to kiss her. He wanted to get lost in her, even if it was just for a moment. And so he did. Forcefully pulling her closer to him, he crashed his mouth onto hers for an intense, all-consuming, moan-inducing kiss. Unfortunately for Rick, Kate knew that he was trying to deflect attention away from what she had asked him.

She put a hand on his chest, broke away from his mouth and went on to rest her head on his shoulder. They were both breathless and heaving. Finally, after her heart rate steadied, she looked up at him.

"You know you can talk to me, right?"

He sighed and put his forehead against hers. "I know. Just... give me some time, okay?"

Kate returned a flicker of a smile before planting a soft kiss against the corner of his mouth. "Okay. When you're ready, I'll be here."

[][][]

_Ricky,_

_I've probably written this letter a thousand times, never finding the right words, the correct flow, the perfect prose. To think I once considered myself a writer and your mentor. You always had a better way with words, didn't you? Anyway, think of this my remorse. My apology to you._

_I have made many mistakes in my life and I'm paying the highest price for them now. I haven't achieved anything and I'm probably going to out of this world without leaving a legacy. Without leaving anything to be remembered by. It's tragic, isn't it? To know that you have wasted your life, to realise that at the end of the day that you have nothing to show for it. Well, Ricky, that's my life, isn't it? I've wasted it. I have nothing to show for my time here except the many sins I've committed. _

_But I am proud of one thing - that I had at least a small part in the creation of Richard Castle. _

_I'm glad to have known you, Ricky. You were probably one of the few true friends I've ever had. _

_I'm sorry for betraying that friendship. I hope you can forgive me in time._

_And when you think of the good old times, don't forget about me._

_Sincerely,_

_Damian _

He closed the letter and swallowed thickly, his eyes teeming with hot tears. He wiped at them and glanced at the clock on his desk. It was past eleven. He had been in his office for a few hours, mostly reading Damian's manuscripts. It was good stuff. _Really_ good stuff. The man had always been a great talent.

He only had the courage to read the letter addressed to him now. Even though it wasn't long or probably even that moving, it did bring him a sense of closure. And a feeling of loss.

Damian Westlake had been his friend, his mentor, his hero.

_'Show me a hero and I'll write you a tragedy.'_ And it was tragic just as the man himself had pointed out. A wasted talent and a wasted life.

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. He was tired. He was sad. He needed-

_Kate_.

A photo of a sleeping Kate on the couch with a sleeping and tiny, month-old Lizzy nestled safely on top of her mother's chest, caught his eye. His lips curved into a sentimental, lopsided smile as he traced the picture on the desk with his thumb. He remembered taking it and then afterwards just sitting there, watching them for a few minutes. He had been completely smitten and remembered grinning like an idiot because of it. The memory brought a sense of comfort, of reassurance, of peace.

She brought him that. They brought him that. His family brought him that.

He _was_ a lucky man. They were lucky people.

With that thought, he stood up, taking one more look at the picture before tuning off the desk lamp. Kate had left him alone for the evening, knowing that he wanted and needed time to just be.

But now, he wanted her. Needed her comfort, her reassurance, the peace that she brought.

[][][]

He found her in bed, leaning against the head board and reading one of Patterson's books.

She was waiting for him.

"I see you're cheating on me... _again_. Guess I should have a word with Patterson about that," Rick said with a smile, pointing to the book in her hands.

Kate glanced up and smiled broadly when he walked in. "Hey... I thought you were never coming to bed." He kicked off his shoes and made his way to their bed.

Rick flashed her a sultry grin. He leaned down over her, bracing his arms on either side of her legs. "With you in it, I'll _always_ come to bed, Lover," he said huskily before leaning in for a deep kiss.

She smiled against his lips and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Mmmm, good to know... _Lover_." Silence descended for a few moments. "You okay?" She finally asked, her voice soft while she soothingly weaved a hand through his hair.

He sighed and sat up next to her. He leaned forward and braced his elbows on his knees while locking his hands together. "Yeah..."

Kate shifted and came to closely sit next to him. "But?" She prompted after a few moment of silence.

"It's just... I feel that I could have done more." He turned to look at her. "I was listed as his next of kin. His _next of kin_, Kate." He shook his head and turned away from her again. Feeling a vast array of emotions simmering beneath the surface. "I should have visited him more or at least I should have written a damn letter. Maybe if I had done that, he wouldn't-"

"No," she interrupted sharply. "Look at me. Rick, _look_ at me." She placed a hand on his face and turned him towards her, forcing him to meet her eyes. "None of this is your fault. What Damian Westlake did, he did on his own. His descent is not your fault." He started to protest, but she quickly cut him off; taking his face in between her small hands.

"You have nothing, _nothing _to feel guilty about." She pursed her lips, willing the tears away. "And the fact that he put _you_ down as his next of kin, says something about the type of friend that you are. The type of man that you are." Her voice faltered slightly. His brow furrowed as his cobalt blues glistened with tears. He didn't want to say anything, feeling his throat constrict with emotion.

Kate leaned forward and briefly placed a kiss against his mouth, before resting her forehead against his. "You are a good man, Richard Castle. You understand me? A good man. The best that I know. And you did more than your share for someone, who frankly, didn't deserve your friendship. So stop feeling guilty and stop being so damn hard on yourself." A smile tugged at her lips. "Besides... being hard on you, is my job." He let out a watery laugh at that and kissed her once, twice, three times.

She raised her eyebrows. "Okay?"

He smiled softly and nodded. "Okay."

"Good. Now get your sexy ass in bed, Mr. Castle. I'm cold and tired and need someone to spoon with."

"Aye, aye Detective."

But before he could get up, she grasped his arm. Kate watched him for a moment, moistening her lips. "I love you and I'm here for you, alright? Always. You're not doing any of this alone and you're _not_ getting rid of me."

A broad smile slowly spread across his features.

Gosh, he loved this woman.

He pulled her in for another toe-curling kiss.

"Ditto, Mrs. Castle. I wouldn't want it any other way."

_X-X-X-X_

_The book o__f love is long and boring_

_No one can lift the damn thing_

_It's full of charts and facts and figures_

_And instructions for dancing_

_But I, I love it when you read to me_

_And you, you can read me anything_

* * *

**A/N: Mmmm... this was different and quite difficult to write. And probably not my finest, but I really wanted to explore this. I think maybe it was difficult to write because it was Castle who needed comforting and not Kate. I hope that they were in character, though. **

**Like always, review and tell me what you think. Did you like the slight role reversal? Were they still in character, especially Kate?**

**Thanks for reading!**

**I apologize for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes.**

**P.S. The title of this chapter is in reference to the quote Kate mentions at the end of 'The Final Nail' (I used it in this chapter as well) and the lyrics at the end is from a stunning song from Peter Gabriel, "Book of love".**


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Yeah, it's been ages since I last updated. Bear with me - I have a thesis to finish. But I've been itching to write some fluff. So here it is. It's short; I'm thinking of doing two or three chapters of different phone conversations between Rick and Kate while he's on tour.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned this story, there _wouldn't_ be a 4 month break in between seasons. Are they trying to kill us?**

**(Updated version - spotted a few errors)**

* * *

**Chapter 28 - Home is where the heart is**

'_Nikki rounded the corner, breathing hard. Sweat was trickling down her back, her heart was beating furiously, her beautifully sculptured face-"_

She smiled – thumb lodged in between her lips – and rolled her eyes.

"_-was tense in concentration. But the gun was steady in her grip. She found solace in the cool metallic feel of the weapon, the familiar weight in her hands. She had the target in sight-'_

She became aware of a consistent and annoying sound coming from her bedside table. She reluctantly drew her eyes away from the page and sighed in frustration. Her phone was ringing. However, when she saw her husband's face lighting up the screen, a large smile erupted over her features.

"Hey," she greeted huskily, knowing exactly the type of reaction she would illicit. Rick took a moment and cleared his throat.

He was so easy.

"H-hi, Honey," he replied sweetly. After a moment, he added: "I didn't wake you, did I?"

Kate glanced at the clock. 23:26. She had trouble sleeping without him there. And she really, _really_ hated book tours. Especially if they were six weeks long and especially when you couldn't go because you have a nine month-old who is currently teething and who has been sick for the last week.

"No Babe, you didn't."

Wow. _Babe_.

He grinned. "Babe, huh? You must miss me, KC."

A smile tugged at her lips as she subconsciously bit her lip, the way she always did when they flirted. She glanced down and toyed with edge of the page where she had stopped reading. "Well maybe a little…" Her small smile grew into a devilish grin. "_Stud_," she said huskily, her voice dripping with sex.

The grin fell from Rick's lips as blood involuntarily rushed southward. He groaned. "Kaaattteee."

That got him.

Every.

Time.

"What?" She asked with faux-innocence, still smiling of course.

"Don't tease me," he responded, his voice strained.

"Why not… _stud_?" She just couldn't resist.

Rick groaned again. "Because, _Honey_, you are going to give me a permanent hard-on if you keep doing that."

She laughed and shook her head. "Stop being so melodramatic, Castle."

"I'm not!" He whined. "I'm horny, my wife is thousands of miles away and I haven't had sex in weeks. Ergo, anything you say in a remotely sexy and/or husky tone is bound to cause a reaction."

Kate laughed softly and rolled her eyes. Yep, he was Martha Rodgers' son.

There were a few beats of silence. "Uh... so what are you wearing?" He asked, lowering his voice.

A desperately turned-on man was pretty damn predictable.

"_Rick_," she admonished.

"Ah come one. Please, Babe. You've already caused a bit of an, umm, _uproar_ on my end."

She was startled for a moment, a blush colouring her cheeks. He was serious? He really had an erec-? Just from what she said?

Whoa. Wow. Now _she_ was turned on.

But when Lizzy let out a soft, squeaky sigh, she turned to look at the small bundle lying beside her on a pillow. Her features softened in motherly appraisal as she studied her daugther's adorable face. She was already the spitting image of her mother. "Sorry, Sweetheart, but I'm not having phone sex with you when our daughter is sleeping next to me."

There was silence at the other end for a few moments before he spoke again, his voice carrying the unmistakable tender tone of a loving, protective father. "How is she? I miss her."

Kate smiled softly as she studied Lizzy's features, brushing a few fingers gently across her cheek. "Ah, she's still a little sick, but doing much better. She misses her daddy too." She paused for a few seconds, brushing a hand over Lizzy's head. "_I_ miss him too."

He sighed. "It'll be over soon. Only three weeks left."

"Ugghh, don't remind me. I'm counting the days."

"I'm counting the hours."

She let out a chuckle. "So… how is it going?"

"Well, Gina is driving me up the wall..."

He told her about the book signings, the interviews, the over-eager fangirls which included an overzealous 65 year-old cougar. He left out the part where said overzealous cougar planted one on him in public without warning. He cringed and shivered as he replayed the trauma in his head. Thankfully word seemed to get to the co-eds and celebutants that he was a _happily married_ man who didn't perform the breast-signing-gimmick anymore. She was thankful for that.

Kate kept him up to date with the newest drama surrounding the upcoming Parish/Esposito-nuptials. She also told him about her dad and Cameron and how she felt about the seriousness of their relationship. When tears started to roll down her cheeks, his steady, rumbling voice soothed, comforted and reassured her that she wasn't being cruel for missing her mother. He made a quip that teasing your husband like she did earlier was cruel and she let out a watery laugh, her spirits immediately lifted. She also kept him up to date with their cute nine month-old's progress, in particular how Lizzy had started crawling around. He had to swallow his tears upon hearing that.

Eventually when Kate looked at the clock again, it read 00:41. She let out a yawn and Rick abruptly stopped talking; he was in the middle of telling her about the interview he was going to the following day.

"I think it's past your bedtime, Mrs. Castle."

"No! I'm fine. Not that tired." Despite her protests, her eyes were drooping.

She yawned again and Rick laughed softly.

"Yeah, _sure_." He sighed. He also didn't want to hang up yet. "It's late, Babe. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Promise. You need to get some sleep."

She let out a heavy, very petulant sigh. "Fine."

He smiled at her whiny tone. "Give my baby girl a kiss, okay?"

"Will do, Daddy."

He just couldn't resist. "Ooh, say that again."

Kate wearily rolled her eyes. "Shut up," she responded around another yawn.

He chuckled. "Night Hon, sleep tight-"

"-And don't let the bed bugs bite. Love you."

"Love you too." There was a brief moment of silence. "And Kate?"

She could practically see the mischievious glint in his eyes. "Yeah?"

"Could you please send me a few pictures with you in something sexy and lacy? Ooh, or even better - naked! I'm dying over here."

She rolled her eyes. "Night, Castle."

Before she went to sleep, though, she sent Rick a photo of his two girls snuggling in bed. Upon seeing the image, his throat suddenly constricted and his vision became blurry as longing tore through him.

Lizzy was nestled on top of her mother's chest, sleeping soundly, while Kate held a hand protectively on her small back. She was smiling softly - a smile she reserved only for him - while her mysterious olive eyes were peaceful and content, the storminess that once occupied them nowhere to be seen.

She was happy. Tired, he could deduce from the dark circles under her eyes, but happy. His lips tilted slightly, his throat still burning as he closely perused Lizzy's small form. His baby girl had grown; he couldn't tell exactly how, but he just knew that she had. She looked more and more like her mother every day.

Rick swiped at his eyes and let out a shaky breath. He seriously had to stop himself from packing up and heading home.

After all, that's where his heart was.

Always.

[][][]

_May be surrounded by a__ million people _

_I s__till feel all alone_

_I just wanna go hom__e_

_Oh, I miss you, you know_

_Let me go home_

_I'm just too far from where you are_

_I wanna come home_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so that was a little different. I hope it was decent, even if it was short. **

**As usual please review and let me know what you think. Any suggestions are also appreciated.**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**

**Lyrics are from Michael Buble's "Home". Yeah, I know, it's pretty cheesy, but it fits perfectly. Besides, I need the fluff to counter the suffocating angst in 'An Odyssey to Us'.**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Consider yourselves lucky. This is me procrastinating to your benefit. **

**This chapter contains some Lanie and Kate and also conflict between our fave couple; can't have the roses without the thorns. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Seriously? You know my answer to this already.**

* * *

**Chapter 29 - Shiny, happy fits of rage**

"So how long before your hubby comes back?" Lanie enquired, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Two weeks," Kate replied despondently.

"Why didn't just go with him?"

Kate turned her gaze to the cup in her hands, gathering her thoughts. "That was the plan, well to join him at least for a few weeks. But with Lizzy starting the teething process, it would have been impossible. I can't hop on planes and jet off all around the country with a sick kid. It's bad enough at home."

Lanie watched her goddaughter with a tender smile. She looked at her friend again and had to suppress an amused chuckle from slipping out. Kate was comically miserable, pouting like an unhappy five-year old.

Yep, Writer Boy has definitely rubbed off on her.

"Well, she looks fine now." Both women turned to watch the miniature one who was busy sucking on a building block, drooling all over the eduational toy in the process.

It was adorable.

"Yeah, she is. She was sick the whole week, though."

Lanie turned back to Kate. "How did you cope?"

Kate sighed, keeping a protective eye on her daughter. "Slept little and soothed a lot. She was crying _so_ much." She smiled when Lizzy let out an excited squeal, spit bubbles foaming around her small mouth. "I think she also misses her daddy."

She sighed and watched Lizzy crawl around in the playpen amongst her fluffy friends. She idly wondered about when her daughter was going to drag her to little-girl tea parties or tug on her hand to come and tuck her in while Daddy read a bedtime story or beg Mommy to push her higher on the swings. Her lips tilted upward as the images flashed through her mind. She couldn't wait to have tickle-giggle-fits with her little girl on lazy mornings, to set an extra plate for the imaginary friend, to find her staggering around in her mother's six-inch heels, to hide with her while Daddy searched for them, to fight off the monsters under her bed, to sing with her to the unborn baby brother or sis-

Whoa. Where did _that_ come from?

"Girl, why didn't you call me?" Lanie asked, snapping Kate out of her musings.

She drew her eyes back to Lanie, who was looking at her with a raised eyebrow, and shrugged. "You have enough on your plate with work and wedding plans..." A teasing smirk slowly curved her lips upward. "_Bridezilla._"

Indignation and annoyance flashed across Lanie's features. "I am _not_ a Bridezilla!" She watched her smirking friend and huffed out a breath, a reluctant smile slowly forming on her lips. "Well, even if I were - which I'm _not_ - can you blame me with a mother like mine and a mother-in-law like Mama Esposito?"

Kate chuckled and shook her head. "I know you're not. I'm just teasing, Lane. So... how are the plans coming along?"

"Which plans? The wedding ones or the ones pertaining to the disappearance of a few _select_ people?" The ME shot back dryly.

The two women broke out in laughter and a few moments later, the cute, miniature one clutching a teddy bear joined them with a joyful shriek and bubbly giggling.

"Oh you are just too damn cute!" Lanie bent down and plucked the giggling nine month-old out of her playpen. "I think I'm gonna steal you." Lizzy was smiling, clutching at her godmother's cheeks. "What do you say, Cupcake? You wanna come live with your Aunt Lanie?" Lizzy squealed and wriggled in Lanie's grasp before sneezing cutely causing both mother and godmother to laugh.

"I don't think her mother or father would like that very much, Lane. Even if she is absolutely gaga about you." Kate had her chin propped up in her hand, watching them with a wide grin. Lanie looked at her friend and smiled while Lizzy bounced up and down in her lap.

"No, I s'ppose not... She's just too darn precious. I know I've said this before, but you and Writer Boy seriously make the most adorable babies."

Kate's grin widened. "Well, I'm sure your and Esposito's babies are gonna be just as adorable." She paused for a moment. "You know? You two should start on one as soon as possible. Lizzy needs a playmate," she said casually. Lanie froze and slowly turned towards her friend . Kate fought the amused grin teasing her lips and arched an eyebrow.

It was a rare sight - a frazzled and rattled Lanie Parish. It was also a very, very amusing sight. Especially if you were the best friend of the woman in question; the best friend who had to suffer through many awkward comments and intrusive questions.

Just a little payback.

"Uh, uhmm, so we- we were talking about wedding plans."

[][][]

_Two hours later and after tucking Baby Castle in..._

"Ah, Mrs. Castle. Did you call to tell me a bedtime story?"

Kate laughed and checked her watch. "Honey, it's barely eight in Chicago."

He shrugged and grinned. "So? The time of day - or night - never stopped us before." The innuendo wasn't lost on her.

"Shut up, Castle." He didn't have to see to know she was rolling her eyes.

"Oh, it's Castle now again, huh? That's not what you scream-"

"Rick," she warned.

He smirked. "Yes Dear?"

"If you still want those _sexy _and _lacy _photos of moi, you better behave."

His smile faltered as carnal images flashed through his mind. "Yes Dear," he breathed. After recovering he spoke again. "Why haven't you called me earlier? Besides wanting to talk to you, I've been going out of my mind with boredom."

"Hence the hundreds of banal text messages you sent me," she commented dryly.

"Hey, they weren't all banal!" He could practically hear her arched eyebrow. "Okay, so maybe telling you about Crotch Scratcher Guy was. But didn't I also tell you that I love and miss you very, _very_ much?"

She softened and bit her lower lip. "You did, every time... Ditto, by the way."

"Love you too, Babe," Rick said quietly. Her heart skipped a beat. "So, why didn't you relieve my boredom?"

And there was the whiny six-year old again...

"I had a date."

"A date, huh? Pray tell, who is keeping you company while your husband is hundreds of miles away? I'm jealous by the way."

She rolled her eyes, picking up her near-empty glass of wine and walking over to the couch. "Just Lanie. She came by earlier for some R&R. _And_ to spoil our daugther. I swear, if I hadn't intervened, she would have taken Lizzy home."

He laughed softly. "Is my baby girl already sleeping?"

Instinctively, she glanced up the stairs. "Yeah. I just put her to bed a few minutes ago."

He sighed. "Oh. And? What is she up to?"

Kate let out that adorable little laugh that he loved - the baby of a chuckle and a giggle.

"Well, she's crawling everywhere and I'm running after her the whole time. Thank God the house is child proofed."

He laughed, the rich sound rumbling into her being. She didn't have see to know that his eyes were crinkling in delight. "I'd love to see that."

"I have her on video - I'll send it to you. She's so fast! You'de be so proud, Daddy. And the way she moves her little body? It's the cutest thing ever." Her voice sounded like the silver lining of a dark cloud, the rainbow after the rain, the sun rising in the East.

His heart ached.

"God, I miss you." The words were a breathless, yearning exhale.

She returned a sigh, placed her glass on the table and turned to lay down on the couch. "We miss you too... But it's almost over, just two weeks left. I'm counting the minutes!" She was grinning, expecting him to be doing the same.

His expression sobered.

Oh, right. _That_.

The silence stretched out for a few moments. Rick scrubbed a hand over his face and sat down on the edge of his bed.

He hated hotel beds. They didn't come with her in them.

"Uh, yeah. About that." Rick rubbed the back of his neck and pursed his lips.

Kate immediately tensed and sat up. "Rick?"

Honesty was the best policy. "Well, with the book sales doing so well they're thinking about extending the tour for another two weeks."

Silence.

Never a good sign.

"_What_?" Her voice was dangerously low. He could imagine her gritting her teeth.

Goodbye melody and brightness. Hello stormy darkness.

He flinched. "They want me to do another two weeks."

"And? Are you?" Her tone now was sharp, strained.

Uh-oh. She was pissed.

He rubbed his forehead and sighed. "I don't want to-"

"-But," she interrupted tersely. He could practically see her folding her arms defensively.

"But my hands are tied. It's in my contract."

She let out a harsh, humourless laugh. "Of course it is."

"Kate..."

She stood up and plucked the now empty glass off the table and walked over to the kitchen. "No, it's fine." It wasn't. "If Gina says jump, you ask how high."

Rick wearily dropped his head into his hand, pressing his palm against his forehead. "Kate-"

"No, no. It's fine. I get it. There's nothing we can do now, is there?"

"I can fight and try to get out of it or... you could always join me," he said quietly, hopefully after a while.

Without hesitation: "No."

Not unexpected. He sighed wearily. "Why not? I miss you."

She ignored the last part. "I'm not taking our daughter to your fangirl-orgies," Kate spat.

Wow. She was _really_ pissed.

He gritted his teeth and stood up, feeling his own temper wavering. "Kate, you _know_ I didn't want to do this damn book tour in the first place!"

She shook her head, anger bubbling into her voice. "And yet you are."

"Please, I don't want to argue about this again, okay?" His tone was firm, resolute, frustrated. "Book tours are part of the deal. You know that. I don't like it any more than you do."

She shook her head while putting her glass in the sink. "Oh come on, Rick! Don't give me that crap. You've been on tour for a month already!" She was furious and needed to lash out. "Let's face it - you like, no, _love_ the attention. You crave it. You're addicted to it. You absolutely love it when your adoring fans scream your name. Just don't, for god's sake, drag me or my daughter into it!"

Silence. Complete and utter silence.

Uh-oh.

She crossed a line, caused a crack, drew blood.

Eventually when he spoke, his voice was eerily quiet and even. The calm before the storm. "Remember to send me that video of Lizzy before you go to bed."

Shit.

Kate closed her eyes, regret and remorse crashing over her like a tidal wave. "Rick-"

"I'll call you tomorrow." He sounded tired.

Before she could reply, apologize, tell him she loved him, the line was dead.

Shit, shit, shit.

Kate briefly closed her eyes and lowered the phone from her ear. She pondered about hitting the redial button, but refrained from doing so. He would need time to cool off; if she called him back now, he would explode.

And then things could get very nasty.

As if on cue and as if sensing her parents' turmoil, Lizzy's sobs sounded out through the baby monitor. Kate felt her own eyes welling up and angrily swiped at them before getting up.

"I'm coming baby girl," she called out, her voice unsteady with regret and longing. "Mommy's coming."

[][][]

She had called him again, twice. He stubbornly didn't answer. But when she sent him the video, he forgave her everything.

He watched as his baby girl wriggled and crawled around enthusiastically, exclaiming with little shrieks of delight. He smiled broadly at the sight. He could hear Kate's dazzling laughter as she followed their fast-moving daughter around. At one point she turned the camera on herself, a magnificent, proud smile adorning her face. She was utterly beautiful. She turned the camera towards Lizzy and squatted down, the nine-month old looking up at her mother with fascinated blue eyes. Lizzy gave another squeal of delight and Kate laughed, scooping her daughter up into her lap. After few moments of jostling the camera, mother and daughter came into view. Happy and beautiful.

"Say hi to Daddy, baby girl," Kate said, pressing her cheek against her daughter's head while waving Lizzy's small, plump arm. She lifted her gaze to the camera and smiled, eyes sparkling brilliantly.

His breath hitched.

"We love you and miss you, Daddy. Come home soon."

The image froze and his eyes burned. Without hesitation, he pressed play again.

He couldn't wait to see this for himself.

And in a week's time, he would.

[][][]

_So be kind_

_And don't lose your mind_

_Just remember that I'm your baby_

_Take me for what I am _

_Who I was meant to be_

* * *

**A/N: So, how was that? It's always tricky writing conflict, especially given the fact that this fic is drowning in fluff. I hope that Rick doesn't come across like some kind of emasculated wimp; I would really like your opinions on that. The next chapter will (probably) be his return.**

**So once again please review and tell me what ya'll think.**

**Title is from the cute Juno song "Anyone else but you" and the lyrics at the end is from the Rent song, "Take me or leave me."**


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: I'm generous, aren't I? Well, that and I just LOVE writing this story. Now, I'm warning you: this chapter is drowning in fluff, but hopefully it doesn't get too cheesy. And if it does, so what? There will time for more angst and drama later.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Lizzy is mine... well, the fictional product of two fictional characters who do not belong to me. Okay, way too meta. **

**September 19th, where are you? **

**(Updated version - spotted a few errors)**

* * *

**Chapter 30 - Happy days are here again**

He quietly shut the door and waited for a few moments, trying to hear whether there were any footsteps hurrying down the stairs. He glanced at his watch and let out a breath. 00:16. She was most likely asleep. Rick grinned and started making his way upstairs.

He was a genius.

Kate had no clue of his homecoming. His grin grew wider as he imagined her reaction - she'd probably be startled, scowl at him, punch him in the arm for scaring her and then jump his bones in a moment of frenzied passion and desire.

He couldn't wait. So couldn't wait to for the wicked ways they would have with each other...

They had made up in the week after their argument due to a heartfelt apology from Kate, a frank discussion of the-issue-that-shall-not-be-named, a few very, _very_ steamy phone sex sessions and another couple of videos of adorable baby Lizzy exploring their home. He was impressed by his ability to keep his mouth shut about his master plan of returning home. He kinda felt like James Bond for being able to keep a secret.

Well, maybe James Bond was a bit of a stretch.

He made his way down the hallway and stopped by the nursery. First things first - he _had _to see his baby girl. He had missed so much in the five weeks that he'd been away. He had to make sure that she was still just a baby. His little girl. Not yet a bright, young woman finishing college-

He made a mental note to phone Alexis later. After all, she was also still _his_ baby girl and he missed her terribly.

Must be a pea-pod thing.

Rick stepped into dark room and walked over to the cot only to discover that it was empty. He frowned and then realized that mother and daughter were probably cuddled up together in bed. His smiled broadly at the thought of finding them there. He imagined that Lizzy was sleeping on her back - as she usually did - with her little mouth agape while Kate held a protective hand on her small body. He also imagined that his side of the bed would be left open. With that line of thinking, he quietly opened the bedroom door and froze.

Empty.

The bed was empty and made up. No sign of his wife and no sign of his baby girl. He stood there for a while, totally confused and extremely disappointed. His frown disappeared and his eyes grew wide.

Panic set in.

He quickly switched on the light and scrambled his phone out of his pocket with jittery hands. When he spoke to her earlier - before boarding his plane - she had mentioned they were going to her father's just for a, quote, "quick visit". Obviously they hadn't made it back home.

"Come on! Come on!" He hissed, hoping that jedi mind tricks could get his phone to restart faster.

His heart was slamming against his chest.

The what ifs started floating around in his mind. It was in times like these that he cursed his (overactive) writer's imagination. What if they got in an accident? What if they were in the hospital? What if no one could get through to him? Or worse. What if they were kidnapped? What if the kidnappers were waiting for him to call-

Two new messages. Huh. From said kidnappers perhaps?

_'Hey Babe, couldn't get through to you earlier; must be something wrong with the connection. 'Nway, just wanted to say goodnight and sleep tight. We're staying at my Dad's, our daughter is exhausted because she had way too much fun at Granpa's! I'm sending you photographical evidence. :-) Love and miss you so much. Come home soon.' _

Oh.

Thank God.

Best. Text message. Ever.

He breathed a sigh of relief and collapsed onto the bed, scrubbing hand over his face. Stupid overactive imagination.

He sat for a few moments before remembering the second message and opened it. He laughed, eyes crinkling in delight as he took in the picture.

It was one of Lizzy with something - probably chocoloate - smeared all over her small mouth and fat little cheeks. And also on her tiny groping hands it seemed. She was sitting in her grandfather's lap and smiling happily.

Was that the distinctive Castle twinkle in her eyes?

_'What do you get when you add togehter a curious little baby girl, a mischievous grandfather and a chocolate bar? This. FYI - we're never leaving them alone together. Ever. Two words: sugar rush.'_

He chuckled at the message. Yep, that was Granpa Jim's doing alright. The kid was going to be spoiled rotten by her Gramps. No doubt. Kate probably scolded her father and then took the picture, most likely thoroughly amused and laughing at the overwhelming adorableness that was their daughter.

Rick smiled and laid back on their bed; tired, disappointed, but mostly relieved. Relieved that he was back and relieved that they were fine. He drew in a breath and glanced around. The scent of her perfume were in the sheets. Her favourite pair of slippers were on the ground next to her side of their bed. Her NYPD hoodie was slung over the chair. Her lingerie was in the drawer above the one with his underwear and socks in. Her red toothbrush was in the holder next to his blue one. Her cherry body wash took up residence in the shower. Her picture adorned his bedside table. Her heart was carried in his.

She was everywhere, even in the places he still had to discover. Surrounding him, invading him, anchoring him.

He was home.

Now he just needed his girls - all of them - together under one roof with him.

[][][]

Kate sighed as she closed the door, pushing the pram with Lizzy in it into the loft. It was still relatively early and quiet. And her daughter was cranky. The sleepover at Granpa's threw out her routine.

She sighed - it was going to be a long day.

Kate shrugged off her jacket and bent down to get her whiny little girl out of her seat. "Alright baby, let's get you out." Once she freed her daughter from the confines of the pram, she started making her way upstairs all the while talking to her mini-me. "We need to get you out of these clothes, don't we? You and Gramps got chocolate all over you, Cupcake. And we have to get you in a bath as well." She smiled and kissed Lizzy on the nose, causing the nine month-old let out a giggle. "Yes we do, baby girl. Mommy also needs to take a show-" She lifted her gaze and froze.

He was here. In their bed. Asleep, tangled in the sheets and clutching her pillow.

He came home.

Her eyes quickly welled as a disbelieving smile grew on her features. He was home. She was snapped out of her daze when Lizzy gently slapped a tiny hand against her mother's cheek. Letting out a watery laugh and wiping at her eyes, Kate walked over to her husband's sleeping form. She carefully sat down next to him while Lizzy squealed excitedly and wriggled in her arms, desperately wanting to go to her daddy.

Rick was dragged into consciousness when he became aware of a warm weight resting on his arm, wetness seeping into the fabric of his shirt and something small plastered against his cheek. He opened his eyes and were met by a twin pair of blue orbs like his own and a smiling, drooling little face. He smiled broadly, turned onto his back and grabbed his baby girl who shrieked happily.

"Hey Sweet Pea!" He held her above him while she kicked and cackled loudly before bringing her down again. "Heya baby girl!" He kissed her forehead and hugged her close to him before lifting his eyes to meet Kate's, still grinning like an idiot. "You've grown so much, Squirt," he continued to speak, kissing his daughter's chubby cheek while Kate beamed at them. Wordlessly he took his wife's hand and tugged her to him; she burrowed into his side while he wrapped an arm tightly around her and placed a kiss in her hair.

"You're home." Kate whispered with a smile, lifting her head to meet his gaze. They stared at each other for a few moments before indulging in a sweet, lingering kiss. When she heard herself moan, Kate broke away. They could _celebrate_ his return later. After all, there was a cute nine month-old present.

He grinned and pressed his forehead against hers as Lizzy clambered all over her father's chest. "I'm home."

[][][]

_That evening..._

"You are so fast! Come here!" Rick laughed as he chased after his quick-moving daughter. He scooped her up and blew a raspberry in her neck, causing Lizzy to shriek and giggle.

"Told you she was fast," Kate threw over her shoulder as she continued to wash the dishes.

He quietly - with Lizzy still wriggling in his arms - stepped in behind his wife, invading her space. "Must get that from you," he murmured into her ear. Kate closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath, leaning back into him.

"Mmhmm." Was all she could manage. Rick's lips tilted slightly before he pressed a kiss in her neck and stepped away.

Hot damn.

She blinked a few times and cleared her throat. "Uh, s-so what did Alexis say earlier?" Kate asked as she turned around to face him while he placed Lizzy in her playpen. He straightened and was still wearing a self-satisfied smirk. Bastard.

His eyes flickered with excitement. "Oh, she's coming for a visit soon!"

"Really?" Kate responded, equally excited as she walked over to where he was sitting. "When?"

He beamed. "Two weeks."

She sat down, throwing her legs across his lap. "Aren't you glad you cut your trip short?"

He nodded while watching Lizzy. "You have no idea," he responded, turning back to her. A soft smile graced his features as he cupped her cheek. "I missed you so much, Kate." His tone was gentle and sincere. And there was something raw, fervent in his gaze. It made her stomach flip. She leaned into his touch and briefly closed her eyes.

"I- we," she glanced at Lizzy, "-missed you too." She paused for a moment, looking down at her hands. "Thank you."

His brow furrowed. "For what?" He asked softly, tucking a stray lock behind her ear.

"For coming home." The smallness of her voice struck him.

Rick watched her face closely, noticing the gleam in her eyes. Without saying a word he bent forward and captured her lips in a warm, uhurried, toe-curling kiss. It didn't take long for the kiss to deepen, escalate into a make-out session and eventually for Kate to end up straddling his lap.

Five weeks of celibacy - Best. Aphrodisiac. _Ever_.

Finally, she had the sense to break away. Eyes dark, hair wild and breaths coming in short pants. "Honey-" Rick immediately wrapped his arms around her middle and pulled her closer while continuing to place kisses in her neck and along her jaw. Her eyes slipped for a moment. "-before we, uh, _continue_, I think we have to get the audience-" she turned to glance at Lizzy who was still crawling around in her playpen. "-to bed. It's a little past her bedtime anyway."

He looked up at his wife, his eyes clouded with desire, and nodded numbly. "Uh, yeah. Yeah, of course." He released her and pulled a hand through his hair in an effort to gather his scattered thoughts. "You go ahead, I'll be there in a minute."

She squeezed his hand and flashed him a smile; a dazzling, carefree, beautiful smile. Her eyes shining with promise... and naked desire.

Hot damn.

"Come on Cupcake, time to get you to bed." Kate bent down and scooped Lizzy out of her playpen; she was already rubbing her eyes and yawning. "Oh yeah, someone is really tired, isn't she?"

[][][]

A few minutes later, Rick was leaning against the doorframe of the nursery and contently watched his wife as she gently cradled their daughter, singing softly to nine month-old. After a few moments, Kate glanced up and smiled at her husband as he approached them where they were rocking in the rocking chair.

"She asleep?" He whispered, bending down to get a closer look at his baby girl.

Kate glanced back at her daughter. "Almost."

"May I?" He was holding out his arms when she looked up. Kate smiled slowly and nodded; she stood and carefully placed Lizzy in her father's waiting arms.

He sat down in the rocking chair, his eyes drinking in his baby girl; engraving all the changes that had occurred; cataloging all the developments he had missed. Kate stood next to him, her attention forcused on his face while a hand absently drew patterns on the back of his neck.

"I used to do this with Alexis," he said quietly, lightly tracing a finger over his daughter's cheek. "Just sitting and rocking her quietly. Sometimes I even read to her, which she loved of course." A large, sentimental smile bloomed over his features. "She was such a curious baby - exploring everything. I had to keep an eye on her twenty-four seven."

Kate chuckled softly. "Sounds familiar... Must be your ADD-genes running through their veins."

"Or just my inherent curiosity and intelligence," he shot back, still watching his daughter.

"What you call being inherently curious and intelligent, I call being a nosy smartass."

He grinned. "Is there a difference?"

She rolled her eyes. "Probably not. Not with you anyway." She paused for a moment. "Alexis must have been a beautiful baby with the red hair, blue eyes and fair skin. I've only seen the pictures of her as a toddler. She was adorable."

He nodded and smiled. "Yeah, she was. She was a really beautiful baby. Still is. All my baby girls are beautiful." He glanced up at Kate and grinned. "The common denominator in that equation seems to be me."

She rolled her eyes as her lips quirked up. "Yeah, Castle, whatever."

"I wouldn't mind having another one of these-" He glanced at Lizzy. "-soon again, though," he said suddenly, looking at his wife. "Another one who looks like you."

Kate laughed softly, a little nervously. Her husband had _that_ (baby-making) look in his eyes and the wheels were turning in his mind.

Whoa.

"Hold your horses, Mr. Castle. This one can't even walk yet. So don't get any ideas in that head of yours," Kate responded, lightly tapping a finger against his skull. She shifted her eyes to their baby girl who was fast asleep against her father's chest. "Actually, I wouldn't mind having a little _you_ running around."

Rick smiled broadly. "A boy, huh?"

She shrugged and nodded. "Yeah. Change things up a little."

He chuckled quietly, carefully getting up. He pressed a kiss on his daughter's head and gently placed a fast asleep Lizzy in her crib. Kate bent down and also pressed a kiss in her daughter's soft, dark hair while whispering a tender goodnight.

"Honey, are you sure you could handle another me running around?" He asked, guiding Kate out the door before quietly shutting it.

"Who says he'll be like you. Maybe he'll be as sensible as his mother." She paused abruptly and gave her head a shake. "Uh, you do realise that we are talking about a son that we are not even trying to beget yet?"

He arched an eyebrow. "Beget? Really?"

She shrugged, entering their room. "What? You can use weird, outdated words, but I'm not allowed to?"

He leered at her, shutting their bedroom door. "Oh, you are allowed to do anything, Mrs. Castle. Anything. You. Want." He approached her slowly.

Kate flashed him a sultry, dirty grin. "Really?" He reached her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Mmm-hmm," he responded, nuzzling her neck.

"Even if it's wild and kinky?" She arched an eyebrow and chewed on her lower lip, her hands sweeping over his chest.

His grin grew delightfully devilish. "_Especially_ if it's wild and kinky. I encourage it."

"Well, in that case, Mr. Castle, let me show you just how wild and kinky I can get after five weeks of not _getting_ any."

He was grinning like a kid at Christmas. "Oooh! Please do-"

Before he could finish, she was on him; her long, muscular legs tightly wrapped around his waist and her hot, demanding mouth fused with his.

Phone sex just didn't beat the real thing...

[][][]

_Distance makes the heart grow fonder._

And apparently libido to grow stronger.

Just ask the Castles - three and a half rounds in and still going strong.

[][][]

_Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left-side brains_

_I knew I wouldn't forget you _

_And so I went let you blow my mind_

_Hey soul sister_

_I don't wanna miss _

_A single thing you do tonight_

* * *

**A/N: Well, I hope that was satisfying. I didn't want to do the whole cliché he-gets-home-and-surprises-her-when-he-slides-into-bed-scenario. I hope the reunion scene was satisfactory. There were quite a bit happening in this chapter and I'm not sure I like the ending, but whatever it's like 03:20 am and I'm tired. **

**Once again, please review and let me know what ya'll think. Was it good? Bleh? So-so?**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**

**Title is a Streisand song and the lyrics at the end from Train's song "Hey soul sister!"**


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: Wow, time flies, huh? Anyway, thanks for all the reviews and alerts for this story; much appreciated. The following chapter is just some fluff and an excuse to write some hot Caskett. It's has a little bit of Alexis and Lizzy as well. Again, I will probably write two or three chapters that follow from this one - the other chapters will probably include more of Alexis and adorable Lizzy. This chapter is definitely T - it's got a little bit of sexy Caskett. What can I say? I love sexy Caskett. They should just get together on the show and make some babies.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Where the hell are you September 19th?**

* * *

**Chapter 31 - Can't Stop**

"Oh come on, Dad! You can't be serious?" Alexis exclaimed with a disbelieving laugh.

It was just past 8am on a Sunday morning with all three-and-a-half Castles huddled around in the kitchen for breakfast. They were the picture of domesticity - Kate was feeding a very awake Lizzy (complete with train noises), Rick was making coffee dressed in a robe and looking adorably bed-ruffled and Alexis was sitting at the counter eating a bowl of cereal like she always used to.

"What?" Rick asked with a bemused expression. He turned to look at his wife, who was sporting an arched eyebrow. "_What_?" he asked again.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," Kate muttered, turning her attention back to feeding Lizzy.

Rick glanced between the two women. "Wait a minute. You two-" He gestured between Alexis and Kate "-don't think I can keep up, do you?"

"We don't _think_ so, Honey. We _know _you can't." Kate winked at Alexis and smiled.

He scowled at them both. "The confidence you have in me is _astounding_," Rick hit back sarcastically before taking a sip of his coffee. Kate sighed, shook her head and proceeded to giving Lizzy another spoon-full of oatmeal goodness… while her husband continued to pout like an unhappy six-year old.

Alexis sighed and patted her father's shoulder. "Dad, it's not because we don't have confidence in you, but because we are concerned about your wellbeing," she placated. Kate's mouth curved briefly as she listened to the girl – she was fit to be a diplomat. Just then, Lizzy shrieked and started to babble incoherently.

"See, your youngest offspring also agrees with us," Alexis pointed out with a grin.

"Nah-uh, she's on my side. You can't take her too." He turned to look at his baby girl (who was still focused on her mother's every move). "Lizzy, stay in the light! Don't let these two drag you down into their dark pits of- ow!" He exclaimed after Kate pinched his arm.

"Your daughter is right," Kate said, glancing at Alexis. "And I agree with her. It's not the best idea for you to be running around with these guys, getting tackled and Lord knows what else. You could get hurt."

He huffed and rolled his eyes. "It's only one lousy little football game. Esposito said that they just needed someone to fill in. That's all."

Secretly, he found her concern endearing and sweet... Not to mention the fact that protective Mama-Bear-Kate was extremely hot. Especially if she just, a mere hour before, indulged you in some adult morning excercise.

Hot damn.

"Yeah," Kate said, lifting an oatmeal-smeared and cackling Lizzy out of her seat. "Someone to fill in after the guy you're replacing broke his collarbone in one of these _lousy _little football games." Rick sobered immediately. "Esposito didn't mention that, did he?" She suppressed a smirk.

"Uh, no- no he didn't," Rick stammered slightly much to the amusement of his daughter and wife. He recovered quickly however and shrugged off the alarm. "But it'll be fine, I'll be fine. It's just football with some cops." He shrugged. "No big deal."

Kate raised her perfectly sculpted eyebrows. "Just some cops, huh? Honey, those guys work out almost every day. They're fit. You're not."

He flashed her an impossibly cocky and arrogant grin.

Why the hell did she find it so sexy?

"Babe, I am in great physical condition." His grin turned devilish. "You of all people should know that."

Kate blushed. "Castle!" Trust him to turn everything into some sort of innuendo.

The man was insufferable.

"Ew, Dad. Over share," Alexis mumbled, frowning disapprovingly.

He ignored their reprimands. "Besides, I work out… regularly."

"Oh please," Kate snorted, wiping Lizzy's hands clean with a wetwipe. "When exactly do you work out, Mr. Castle?"

His lips curved into a grin. "When the kids are asleep and you and I are alone, Mrs. Castle," he returned coolly, waggling his eyebrows at her. Kate froze and felt the heat rise to her cheeks (again).

He was on fire. He usually got worse with sexual innuendo just after he got lucky. She glared at him, cheeks burning.

Smug bastard.

Incredibly sexy, ruggedly handsome smug bastard with very talented hands and a fantastic mouth and a big-

"Ugh, I just lost my appetite," Alexis commented with a grimace, abandoning her bowl of cereal. "Seriously, Dad. You need a memo on what is appropriate to say in the presence of your children." She walked over to Kate, who was still sporting red cheeks and studiously avoiding eye contact.

"Isn't that right, little sis?" Lizzy looked up at her big sister and giggled, bouncing excitedly in her mother's arms. "What do you say, should we get you dressed and remove ourselves from possible psychological damage that could take years of therapy to recover from?" Lizzy sucked on her little fist as she watched Alexis before extending her small arms to the young redhead.

Alexis laughed. "Thought so."

Kate smiled broadly and handed Lizzy over to Alexis.

"Thanks, Lex."

"No problem... _Mom_," the younger woman teased with a smile before turning her attention to the youngest Castle. Lizzy was groping her older sister's hair, fascinated by the bright colour. "Come on, Adorable One, let's get you dressed. You know what I'm thinking? That polka dot shorts with the…" Alexis' voice trailed off as she and Lizzy ascended the stairs.

Rick leaned against the counter and watched the whole exchange, trying not make it into a Hallmark-moment in his head and failing miserably. He felt like enveloping all three of them in a bear-hug and shedding a few sentimental-

Oh yeah, he needed a manly football game.

"What does a girl have to do to ge some service around here?" Kate asked, snapping him out of his thoughts. Looking at her, Rick concluded that his wife was absolutely irresistable in a pair of yoga pants, a loose-fitting NYPD t-shirt that occasionally slid off her shoulder while silky, unruly chocolate brown locks framed her striking face.

He grinned and strode over to where she was sitting, arms folded and a challenging gleam in her olive eyes. Oh, he enjoyed this game so very, very much. Rick leaned in, invading her personal space and entrapping her body with his. She was surprised, but recovered well.

"Oh, all you have to do is ask, Detective," he breathed into her ear, a hand brushing her hair away from her shoulder and neck. She shivered and briefly closed her eyes.

Holy crap.

Richard Castle did seduction well, _very_ well.

He placed a kiss just below her exposed ear and hummed. "What do you want... _Beckett_?" He murmured, nudging his nose against her pulse point as he breathed her in.

Kate let out a shaky breath, a rush of arousal washing over her. 'Beckett' was her version of 'Stud'. If it weren't for Alexis and Lizzy upstairs, Richard Castle would be half-naked on the kitchen counter with Kate draped all over him by now. Instead, she fisted her hands to keep her from grabbing him and doing just that.

How the hell did he make her want to lose control like that?

"Uh," she started, but lost track of her thoughts as he gently nipped at and sucked on her earlobe.

"Mm-hmm?" She could feel his grin as he trailed kisses down her neck. Smug bas-

Time to turn the tables.

She slowly let her left hand sneak in under his shirt, lightly caressing the skin just above the hem of his pajama pants. Rick jerked back at the contact with wide, dark eyes.

Kate's lips quirked. Mission accomplished.

She bit her lip and gazed at him from under her dark lashes. He clenched his jaw, his eyes growing nearly black with lust. Kate leaned up, making sure to press herself flush against him while her fingers continued to toy with the hem of his pants.

She brushed his cheek with hers before positioning her mouth next to his ear. "Whatever you have to offer... _Stud._" Her voice coming out rough and throaty, like when she's about to-

She unexpectantly dipped her hand inside his pants and stroked him once before quickly removing it.

"Kate," he growled, folding over as she darted away from him. She was grinning, a wild twinkle in her eye.

Cruel tease.

Brilliant, gorgeous, sex-on-legs cruel tease.

He watched her, still slightly bent over and breathing hard. If it weren't for Alexis and Lizzy, Kate Castle would be naked on the dining room table and screaming his name right about now.

He wanted to do dirty, dirty things-

"You can make me an omelette while I shower."

They were playing with fire. It was fun, but... there were kids in the house.

"Kate, come on! Don't leave me like this," Rick protested. He still didn't dare to stand up straight or to move from his position at the counter. She had rendered him incapable of doing that for at least a few minutes.

"No, no, you already got lucky once this morning and you promised me breakfast. Furthermore, _you_ started this little game. _I_ am merely ending it, Writer Boy," she shot back, smiling sweetly.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "You're being very mean, Detective, and it's Writer Man. Writer. _Man_."

She paused and licked her lips, glancing pointedly at his pants. "Oh, believe me - I know you are... Stud." And just to torture him further she slipped into a Russian accent. "You're a beeg, ghandsome man." With that she disappeared, laughing, up the stairs.

He dropped his head and groaned, viciously gripping the counter to keep from chasing after her.

_'Kids in the house, kids in the house, kids in the house.'_

[] [] []

_You have everything I could ever want _

_You speak to my soul like you've known it before_

_And I just can't stop_

_Lord I can't stop myself_

_I can't stop_

_Lord I can't stop myself, now_

* * *

**A/N: This chapter was really just an excuse to write some sexy Caskett. *Tee hee.* ****Well, I hope you liked it; it's short, but well, I have a lot of other stuff on my plate right now. The next few chapters will probably follow from this one.**

**Once again, review and tell me what you think.**

**I apologize for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title of the chapter and lyrics at the end are from Mozella's song 'Can't stop'.**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: I am free! Of my thesis that is. Yay! And I am an aunt again to a beautiful baby boy. Double yay! The Rugby World Cup is also begging this week (Go Bokke!). Triple yay! **

**So, I'm in high spirits. Very high spirits. And I'm sharing my joy with the rest of the Castle fic fandom. ****Only 14 days left until 401!**

**Anywho, this chapter follows from the previous one. Just pointless fluff as usual.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Only little Lizzy belong to me.**

* * *

**Chapter 32 - Punch drunk love**

"So, Castle, how's that foxy wife of yours doing? She still got that smokin' bod after being preggers?"

Rick gritted his teeth and kept his focus on a spot on the ground.

_Don't let him get to you. Don't let him get to you. Don't let him get to you. _

His lungs were burning, sweat was dripping into his eyes, his shoulder ached, his knee had a nasty grass burn and Joey Asshat was playing mind-games, making risqué comments about Kate.

His wife and mother of his child. Well, _children_. She was a mother to Alexis-

"You're a lucky man, Writer Boy. She's hot. Long legs, nice ass. _Very_ nice ass," his direct opposition continued to taunt.

He dug his hand further into the patch of grass, feeling the dirt under his fingernails.

The bulky, bald-headed man was treading lightly, _very_ lightly.

Ryan had warned him about this. He had shrugged and grinned – he could take friendly hazing and a few jibes. He was a guys' guy. He could do the shoulder clap, laugh at crass jokes and take things on the chin. Apparently, a friendly game of football didn't exist between the rival cops. Win at all cost.

But _this_? Targeting Kate to get under his skin? For a lousy little football game?

That was crossing a line. A major one. It had started out as a joke about him being the obedient puppy-dog tag-along, the fumbling writer, the plucky sidekick. He laughed it off; they were just trying to get to him. Somehow, however, it had become more biting. More inappropriate. More about Kate.

And if it didn't stop soon, he was going to do something stupid to wipe that grin off Officer Dipshit's face.

"Forty-two! Ninety-nine! Seventy-five!" Esposito shouted the play, his face contorting in concentration. He was sporting a busted lip and a few scrapes and bruises.

Lanie was going to kill him.

_Yeah_, Rick thought, _definitely not just a friendly football game_. He glanced at Joey Asshat/Officer Dipshit, who was still grinning at him, and felt his jaw clench involuntarily.

Yep, he was so going to do something stupid soon.

Very soon.

But if the dumbass just kept his mouth shut, then maybe, _maybe_ he could stay cal-

"I bet she's great in the sack."

_Oh._

Oh, hell no.

"Hut! Hut!"

So much for staying calm.

[][][]

"This is nice," Alexis sighed as they sat down. After a number of hours shopping, the three Castle women ended up at the small, intimate street café that Kate had discovered a few months ago while being out with Lizzy.

"Yeah, it is," Kate replied with a smile, taking Lizzy out of her pram. The 10 month-old whined and wriggled in her mother's arms. She was tired, hungry and, as a result, cranky.

"Okay, okay. Calm down. Mommy's gonna give you something now," Kate placated, rummaging through the baby bag. "You're just as impatient as your father."

Alexis chuckled, got up and took Lizzy from Kate.

"Hey Kiddo, you giving your mom a hard time?" Lizzy watched her big sister with rapt attention, her small mouth slightly agape. She was standing in Alexis' lap, bouncing up and down, babbling and groping at her sister's red hair. She was totally entranced by the colour.

Lizzy let out an excited squeal and giggled. Both Kate and Alexis laughed. A few minutes passed with each of the adult women placing their respective drink orders and the miniature one (finally) enjoying a little bit of yoghurty delight. Of course, not without getting it smeared all over her chubby cheeks.

"Oh baby girl, you're making such a mess," Kate complained with a laugh as she wiped down her daughter's face, who promptly squirmed away from her mother.

Alexis chuckled and shook her head. "Oh, you are so totally like Dad. It's kinda scary," the young red-head commented with a smile.

"Tell me about it," Kate responded with a lopsided grin.

"He's already bought her a laser tag outfit, hasn't he?"

The older woman threw her head back and laughed.

"No, not yet. But he has made her sit with him and watch _Star Wars._" She paused for a moment, an amused and sentimental smile blooming over her features. "They were both asleep thirty minutes into the movie." Kate had walked in on them - Lizzy on top of her father's chest, drooling all over his shirt and Rick on his back on the couch, holding his daughter in place with a large hand on her body, also drooling.

Ridiculously adorable.

Alexis shook her head and smiled. She hugged the little body in her lap and planted a smacking kiss on Lizzy's cheek, causing the 10 month-old to laugh in delight.

"Oh lil' sis, you're doomed to becoming a Star-Wars-fencing-laser-tag-playing-geek like me." Alexis placed another kiss on top of Lizzy's head. "But believe me, you'll never have more fun." Kate picked up the longing, the wistful tone in Alexis' voice. She reached out and squeezed the younger woman's arm. Their eyes met and Alexis, with Lizzy still bouncing in her lap, offered her stepmother a small smile.

"I remember when I was about ten or eleven, I begged him for _Star Wars_ light-sabers for _weeks_. I was completely obsessed, just like him of course."

"Of course," Kate said with a smile.

Alexis grinned while Lizzy grabbed the necklace around her neck and tried to feed herself with it. "Anyway, on my birthday Dad woke me up at like five or six in the morning, absolutely giddy with excitement. He proceeded to drag me downstairs and into his office. I was still half-asleep, but when he pulled out the light-sabers, I totally freaked. I was so excited. We ended up playing for hours, running all over the place. He called himself the Jedi Master and me his student."

Kate laughed. "I can only imagine the two of you." She paused for a moment. "He made the light-saber noises didn't he?"

Alexis smiled sheepishly. "We both did. But in my defense, I was only ten or eleven."

Kate grinned. "You know, I still catch him sometimes - fighting off some unseen forces, complete with the noises. He still thinks he is a Jedi Master. Ridiculous man. He's even tried to get me to do battle with him. I refused, obviously."

Alexis looked down at her adorable, blue-eyed baby sister. "Well, now he has a new playmate to play with."

Kate groaned. "I'm doomed, aren't I?"

The younger woman glanced back at her stepmother. Her friend. Her confidant. "Yeah, 'fraid so, Kate. You don't stand a chance." They grew quiet for a few moments, sipping their drinks and watching Lizzy making friends with a butterfly. She was giving little shrieks of delight as the colourful insect flapped away slowly. Of course she had tried to grab the small animal to inspect it with her mouth. Everything still went to her mouth, much to her parents amusement and alarm. Just the previous week she almost sucked on a bar of soap.

The three of them sat and watched the world go by before Alexis checked her watch and glanced at Kate again. Her expression growing slightly serious.

"Hey, do you think Dad survived the game?"

[][][]

"Bro, Beckett is so going to have your ass," Esposito commented with a wry smile, his own lips busted and his cheek sporting a bruise. They were at the Old Haunt, enjoying a few beers with some of the boys in the aftermath of the game/fist-fight.

Rick glared at him with his still normal-looking eye. His was nursing his left one with his cold beer. It was probably going to black by the next day.

But it was cool and manly.

And, hopefully, his wife would find it incredibly irresistible... Nah, that was wishful thinking on his part.

"Yeah well, Lanie is going to skin you alive. At least I'm already married. _You're_ the one getting married in a month's time and looking like _that_." The smirking detective's face instantly fell.

Ryan nodded. "That's true, man. I'm glad I'm not you." A large grin appeared on his uninjured face. "In fact, I'm glad I'm not either one of you." He only had a few scrapes and grass burns.

"Oh come on, I was defending my woman's honour!" Rick protested.

"I don't think Beckett would like you referring to her as _your woman_, Castle," Ryan replied with a grin.

"Well, she is, isn't she, Honey Milk?" The grin fell off Ryan's face. "And I made sure that Officer Dipshit knows that nobody talks about _my_ woman like that," Rick replied with a hint of indignation.

The other man, next to the mystery writer, laughed and shook his head. "Officer Dipshit. Very appropriate, Castle," the fair-haired, 40-something John Carter commented. He paused before continuing. "Listen man, I'm sorry about him. He's a real douche. Nobody at the 34th really likes the guy."

Rick waved him off. "It's not your fault the guy is an asshole with little-man-syndrome."

The other man grinned. "No probably not. But I should have done something."

"Wasn't necessary - I jumped you to it," Rick said with a small smile. He took a sip of his beer before continuing. "Besides, I think_ I_ should be the one apologizing for starting a brawl."

John laughed. "It's not a brawl if it only involves two guys throwing punches and the other guys trying to get them off each other."

"Well, Esposito did get a punch for his troubles," Ryan pointed out.

"Just, please, make sure that Lanie knows I got into a fight to save your ass, Castle."

"Hey, I was doing perfectly fine before you intervened."

"I gotta say Castle, your not too bad for a writer," John said with a grin.

"Thank you," Rick replied with a satisfied smiled.

"Your wife taught you well."

The writer's face fell comically.

"Oh burn!" Ryan laughed.

Rick only returned a lopsided grin. "Yeah well, what can I say, she's a good teacher."

"A good boss," Esposito commented.

"A very good detective," Ryan added.

Rick smiled softly. "An even better woman." He raised his glass. "Well, gentlemen, I propose a toast. To the women in our lives."

The other three men raised their glasses. "Hear, hear!"

[][][]

_An hour later..._

His eye was already starting to turn to a darkish purple shade. He touched it and winced. Well, at least it was rugged and kinda roguish. Yeah, Kate would dig it.

Eventually.

He rolled his shoulder; it still felt sore and stiff. He lifted the towel that was tied around his waist to check the nasty grass burn on his knee. It was not pretty.

Rick sighed as he looked at his reflection in the bathroom mirror again.

He was getting old. The extra lines on his face, the few gray hairs sticking out - which Kate said made him look more distinguished - and the fact that his eldest daughter was finishing varsity just confirmed it.

Okay, so maybe that was a little dramatic, but still. He had to keep up with a baby girl and a young, hot, fit, extremely flexible-

Rick heard the sudden cacophony of noise and chatter, a smile automatically tilting his lips upward. He winced again and touched his eye. He idly wondered if Lizzy was going to start crying once she saw her horribly disfigured father-

Okay, so Kate was right - melodrama _was_ his middle name.

Just as he stepped out the bathroom, he heard Kate's voice at the other side of their bedroom door. "Yeah, Lex, you can give her some of that. Thanks," she said opening the door. Rick quickly turned around and pretended to be searching for a shirt in the drawer.

"Oh, hey," Kate greeted, surprised.

"Hey," he returned without turning around to face her.

There were a few beats of silence before he felt her lanky arms snake around his bare waist. "You know, if you just waited a little longer, I could have joined you, Stud." Her voice was low, throaty and just too damn sexy. He needed a cold shower now. She placed a kiss on his injured shoulder and felt him stiffen in response.

"Hey, you okay?" From sex-goddess to concerned wife in five seconds flat - it made his head spin.

Finally, Rick turned around and smiled sheepishly at her. "Just a few scrapes and bruises, Honey."

Her eyes widened and she stepped away from him, taking in the bruised jaw, busted lip and swollen, black eye. "Holy shit! Rick, what the hell happened to you?" The tone of her voice was a combination of shock, concern and anger.

"Just a little bit of football. No big deal." He shrugged his injured shoulder and winced.

Her jaw clenched. "Castle," he heard the warning in her tone and sighed, walking over to the bed.

"It was just a misunderstanding between me and another guy. No big deal, I promise." He didn't want Kate to know about the snide and inappropriate remarks Asshat had made about her.

She watched her husband for a long moment before sitting down next to him. "Yeah, this looks like no big deal," Kate said softly, gently tracing a finger over his eye and down to his busted lip. She placed a soft kiss on his mouth. "Damn it, Rick. This is why I didn't want you to do this."

"Don't worry, Babe, football season is over for me. I was only picked for one game anyway. Besides, I can't afford to injure these babies," he held up his hands and grinned.

Kate sighed. "Too late, Rick. And, by the way, this isn't funny." She took his right hand and rubbed a finger over his bruised knuckles.

"Oh." Her brow was furrowed as she looked at his hand. He decided to lighten the mood. "But hey, you can't deny the fact that you find my injuries sexy. And irresistible. It's kinda roguish, don't you think?" She glanced back up and raised an eyebrow, amusement flickering in her eyes for a moment.

_Only_ for a moment.

"No, Castle, I prefer your boyish, _uninjured_ face. It's kinda difficult to recognize my husband beneath all the bruises." She paused for a moment, her face etched in concern as a hand traced along his jaw. "Maybe we should get you to a doctor."

He shook his head and proceeded to leer at her, inching nearer until he felt her breath wafting over his cheek. "I only need you to nurse it better. _Please_, nurse it better, Beckett," he whispered leaning in to kiss the corner of her mouth. But before he could ravish her, Kate got up and walked towards the door.

Rick blinked and watched her in bewilderment. She didn't want him to kiss her.

Huh.

"Rick, if you hadn't noticed, I'm kind of upset with you right now."

His face fell and he stood up. "Kate-"

She sighed and dragged a hand through her hair. "Just get dressed, okay? We'll put an ice-pack on that eye downstairs." She paused before opening the door. "And so help me, Castle, if Lizzy starts crying once she sees you."

[][][]

Alexis scolded her father and Lizzy _did _cry when she saw him. After being convinced that he was indeed her father and not some hideous monster, she did calm down and became fascinated with his purple/darkish eye. So after a few minutes of relaying and watering down the tale of how he got his injuries, normalcy returned to the Castle household. He and Alexis played a few intense rounds of chess while Kate was bathing Lizzy. Later, after apologizing to his wife while she iced his eye, Rick and his women ended up in their bed, watching the _Wizard of Oz. _Kate and Rick were lying on each end with Alexis in between them and Lizzy snuggled on top of her mother's chest, sound asleep thirty minutes into Dorothy's adventure. A few minutes later, Alexis was also dozing off.

"They have no stamina," Rick said, brushing a strand of hair away from his eldest's face. "I'm a little disappointed. I mean this is a classic and _my_ offspring just... fell asleep."

Kate laughed softly, rubbing her baby girl's back. "Well, knowing you, I'm sure Alexis has already seen this about a million times and as for this one-" she planted a kiss against her daughter's head. "-I'm sure there will be other opportunities to introduce her to the wonderful world of Oz."

"And _Star Wars_... again," Rick added and Kate rolled her eyes.

She glanced at him again and smirked. "Of course _Gone with the Wind_ is also a necessary addition."

He groaned softly. "No."

Kate grinned at him. "Oh, absolutely. And of course, every Barbra Streisand movie."

"Don't you dare."

She shrugged and lifted an eyebrow. "What are you going to do to stop me,_ Kitten_?"

He playfully narrowed his eyes at her. "Well, if it weren't for my injuries and for the fact that both my daughters were present, I would be tempted to tackle and pin you to the bed... And then proceed to thoroughly _punish_ you."

She smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Of course. But how's that going to stop me from exposing our daughter to Barbra Streisand?"

"It's probably not going to stop you, but I might get a son out of the deal to do manly stuff with," he shot back casually.

Kate's eyes widened and she huffed out an incredulous laugh. "W-what?" She all but sputtered. Rick grinned in glorious victory.

She was so cute being all flustered.

"You know by pinning and punishing I actually meant-"

"-Yeah, I got that. Your mind always goes to the gutter. But how the hell did you go from _that_ to you having a son?"

He was still grinning and she was still adorably ruffled about the bizarre turn of their conversation. It was made even more bizarre by the presence of the two daughters in their bed.

Rick sat up. "Honey, when a man and a woman love each other-"

"-Shut up, Castle," she grumbled quietly. "FYI, _that_ is not happening anytime soon."

"What? The baby-part or the sex-"

"Okay, seriously," Alexis suddenly said, sitting up. "Please, Dad, do _not_ finish that sentence. I've been scarred enough already."

Rick's face fell in horror and Kate burst out laughing, the sound waking Lizzy. Before she could say anything or be properly embarrassed, her phone rang. Her 10-month started to whine and whimper at being so rudely awakened.

Kate grabbed her phone. "Lex, would you?"

The young red-head smiled and took a sleepy Lizzy from her mother.

"Hey, Lanie," Kate greeted, stepping out of the room.

The three remaining Castles continued to sit on the bed. "So, a baby brother, huh?" Alexis said after a while, an amusing glint in her eyes.

"Uh, not- not yet. I was just joking. Ruffling Kate's feathers."

"I know, Dad. But that would be great. Imagine a little Rick Castle running around. That would be so adorable. Oh man, I'd pay to see you and Kate chasing after him!"

Rick chuckled softly. "I'd love that. Although, I don't know if my old legs would be able to run after another one." He grinned at his daughter. "Remember how I used to chase after you?"

A large smile erupted over the young red-head's face. "Yeah. Good times."

"Good times," her father echoed. The grew silent for a few moments. "You grew up too fast," he said sadly, tucking a strand of hair in behind her ear.

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, don't get mushy on me now."

"What? It's true. You _did_ grow up too fast. If I had my way, you and baby bird here would both stay little and not grow up and get to know boys and want to leave your father to go off to college and someday marry some guy-"

"Dad, you're still my number one guy. You'll always be," Alexis said before giving her father a peck on his (uninjured) cheek.

He smiled at her. "Good answer." Lizzy yawned and rubbed her eyes.

"I think it's time for someone to go to bed," Rick said, rubbing a hand over Lizzy's back. "Come Sweet Pea, let's get you to bed." He took her from Alexis and turned to the red-head. "You wanna read her a bed-time story with me?"

"I'd love to."

[][][]

_Fifteen minutes later..._

"What did Lanie have to say?" Rick asked when his wife returned. He was already in bed, once again nursing his eye with a pack of frozen peas.

She smiled at him, her expression soft. His brow furrowed for a moment. "What do you think?" She replied climbing under covers. "Let's just say that Javier Esposito is lucky to come away unscathed. She was furious."

Rick chuckled. "Oh man, I can only imagine. We warned him."

Kate lifted his arm and tucked herself against his side, her head coming to rest on his chest. Rick smiled and kissed her temple. "Is Lizzy asleep?"

"Yeah, Alexis and I read her a bed-time story and tucked her in."

"Okay, good. Thanks." Kate smiled as she absently traced patterns on his chest. "I love you," she said quietly, meeting his gaze.

He smiled at her. "I love you too." He pressed a kiss against her forehead. "I take it I'm forgiven?" He ventured after a few silent moments.

Kate shifted to look at him and smiled. "Yes." She leaned up and kissed him gently before returning to her original position. When she started fiddling with the hem of his shirt, he knew something was on her mind.

He always knew.

"Hey, what's up?" Rick tilted her face upwards.

Kate took a breath. "Lanie told me Esposito had gotten involved in the fight because he had to physically pull you off the other guy," she said softly. "He told her that he had never seen you that angry." Rick's eyes shifted away from hers.

"Kate, I-"

"-He told her that the other guy was saying things about me and that you snapped," she interrupted and his eyes snapped back to hers. They watched each other for a few moments. "You defended my honour, Castle." Slowly a grin bloomed over her features.

He gave her a shy, lopsided grin. "Yeah well, nobody talks about my woman like that."

Kate lifted an eyebrow. "_Your _woman? Excuse me, Mr. Castle, but-"

He silenced her with a hard, hot and possessive kiss; plunging his tongue into her mouth without warning.

Richard Castle the Adorable Goofball and Sweet Husband was wonderful, but Richard Castle the Commanding Man and Demanding Lover was erotic and intoxicating and, oh, just so damn hot.

"_My_ woman," he informed her breathlessly, his lips still hovering over hers.

Kate laughed breathlessly, dropping her head to his shoulder. "Caveman."

He grinned and squeezed her. "_Your_ caveman."

She looked at him again, trailing a hand over his cheek and up to his injured eye. "Yeah, my caveman." Kate kissed him softly. "But no more football for you, Honey. Even though I find this-" she touched his eye. "-incredibly sexy-"

"I knew it!"

"-I prefer you without the disfiguration." She patted his cheek.

He smiled at her. "Noted."

After giving her husband one more lingering, sweet kiss, Kate settled against him once more. They lay in content silence before Rick started fiddling; he had something on his mind.

She always knew.

"Something you wanna share with the class?"

He paused for a moment. "Just one question, Kate."

"Mmmm?" she responded lazily.

"After enduring such a trying day and suffering injury in order to defend your honour-" She smiled, already knowing where this was heading. "-don't I get a reward or something?"

She sighed and turned to look at him. "What do you want, Castle?"

He leaned down and pressed a kiss just below her ear, her skin tingling at the sensation. "Oh, you know what I want, _Beckett_." His voice was low and husky; Kate bit her lip to suppress a whimper as he sucked on her earlobe.

He pressed another kiss in her neck. "I want you to wear a golden Princess Leia bikini for Halloween."

Kate burst out laughing, slapping a hand against his chest. "You are ridiculous."

He smirked. "And you're hot and bothered right now, aren't you?"

"Shut up, Castle."

"I want you too, Babe."

"Don't call me Babe. And you're not getting lucky tonight."

"Aww, come on Snookums. I defended your honour today and got beaten to a pulp because of it."

"If you call me Snookums again, I'm going to hurt you."

"Promise?"

"Yes."

"Can we use the cuffs this time? Remember my safe word is apples."

"Get the light, Castle."

He flashed her a dirty grin. "Snookums, if you wanted to see my light-saber, you only had to ask."

Kate flashed him an equally dirty grin filled with carnal promises. Suddenly, she was leaning over him, her chest pressing against his and her knee strategically placed between his legs.

"Rick," she moaned into his ear. His mouth went dry, his pants tightened. "I warned you." She took his earlobe into her mouth. "To not call me that ever again. But you don't listen, do you? Do you know what happens to boys who do not listen?"

His breathing was ragged. "Th-they get punished."

"Yes," she breathed, her hand sneaking up to his ear.

"Apples! Apples! Apples!"

[][][]

_Go on, go on, come on leave me breathless_

_Tempt me, tease me until I can't deny this_

_loving feeling, make me long for your kiss_

_Go on, go on_

_Yeah, come on..._

* * *

**A/N: Well, I hope that was enjoyable. **

**Please review and tell me what you think. Once again, thank you for reading and reviewing and also for your patience with me.**

**Lyrics at the end are from the Corrs' song "Breathless".**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: Seriously, this year is going by too quickly! My last update was like a more than a month ago. Crazy. Anywho, just another excuse to write sexy Caskett fluff. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own it, never will. Oh my word I'm just so glad season 4 has started! Awesome! It's gonna be great. Thank the Lord for the internet.**

**Now, Andrew Marlowe, on behalf of the whole fandom can you please get these two people together, 'cause seriously they were MADE FOR EACH OTHER.**

**(Updated version - corrected a few things)**

* * *

**Chapter 33 - All shook up**

"So, where are you guys, or should I say _girls_, going tonight?" Rick asked. Lizzy was wriggling in his arms, freshly bathed and dressed in her lady-bug jammies.

Kate glanced up at her husband and grinned, pulling on her impossibly high (and ridiculously sexy) pair of Louboutins.

"Oh, wouldn't you like to know, Writer Boy." She stood up and walked to her dresser with Castle following, openly ogling the contours of her ass in the dark form-fitting jeans.

"Ah, come on. I promise I won't tell Esposito anything."

Kate smiled and rolled her eyes, but kept quiet.

"Kaaatteee."

She huffed out an annoyed breath and continued to apply her mascara. "Why is it so important for you to know, Castle?"

He shrugged. "Just… I'm curious."

She stopped applying mascara and watched Rick in the mirror. He was being all domestic (and hot) with his bare feet, ratty jeans and blue NYPD t-shirt while Lizzy clambered all over him.

It was kinda heart-melting.

"Are you worried that we're going to a *ahem* ladies-friendly institution?"

"No," Rick scoffed, his brow furrowing.

She lifted an eyebrow and fought the grin that was threatening. "Oh, really?"

"Yeah, really." He returned a shit-eating grin of his own. "Besides, you don't need other sources of _entertainment._ You've got me."

She turned around and gave him a heated look which made his grin falter. Kate slowly sauntered up to him; a graceful, feral, predatory beauty. He was helpless against it, against her.

A moth to the flame.

Kate pressed her cheek against his, lining her body with his. A perfect fit. "Believe me, I am well aware of what I've got," she breathed into his ear, tracking a hand low on his stomach. "I am a very lucky woman to have a husband with such a big... _heart_."

He gulped and tightened his hold on his daughter who was babbling away and bouncing in his arms, completely unaware that her father's brain had just melted.

"Uh... I... uh."

"So easy." Kate laughed and patted his cheek before giving her daughter's chubby one a smacking kiss and running a hand affectionately through her dark hair. "Don't worry, it's just gonna be dinner and drinks at Maddy's place."

"No show?" Rick quipped after recovering.

She flashed him a wide smile and gave him a quick kiss. "No. That I get from you later tonight. So be ready... _Stud_." She bit her lip and swept a thumb over his mouth, lowering her tone. "And I promise that if you're good, you might be getting one from me."

He groaned. "Oh, don't tease me, Detective."

[][][]

"Kate, what the hell is this?" Lanie exclaimed in surprise amid clapping, laughing and familiar female faces smiling back at them. The petite ME turned to her friend, eyes wide and sparkling.

The dark-haired detective grinned. "Well, just a little get-together with all your girlfriends before the big day." Kate's grin got wider. "And of course, a little payback for what you did to me."

Lanie's face fell. "Oh no."

Kate laughed. "Oh yes."

She ushered her friend towards the large table with all the women - Lanie's younger sister, Michelle, a couple of close cousins, Rhonda, a varsity friend, Esposito's sisters and Jenny and Madison.

There was no Mama Esposito and no Mama Parish in order to ensure the continued existence of humankind.

"Finally! We were almost tempted to send out a search party for you guys!" Madison moved through the group and towards them.

"Hey, Maddy. Long time no see." Kate greeted her friend.

Madison tugged the detective into a tight hug. "Hey Becks. Yeah, _too_ long."

The hostess turned to the woman of the moment, her smile getting wider. "Dr. Parish, good to see you. Another one bites the dust, huh?"

Lanie laughed and embraced the other woman. "Good to see you too, Maddy." The ME grinned mischievously, lifting an eyebrow. "And I'm not biting anything."

The blonde laughed and ushered Lanie towards the group of other women. While Lanie was surrounded by the other women, Madison turned her attention back to Kate, linking her arm with the detective's as the two women made their way to the table with the other guests.

"So, how's baby Castle?"

Kate's grin immediately got wider, brighter. "Great. She's wonderful and beautiful and just perfect," she gushed. "You have to come and visit."

"Aww, I want to so badly. It's just been busy, you know? But don't worry - Aunt Maddy will definitely be at her first birthday party."

"You better be."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world. And how's Daddy doing?" Madison asked, her eyes twinkling knowingly.

Kate bit her lip, feeling a little giddy and proud that Rick was hers. "He's great too."

"Mmhmm, I bet he is." Madison grinned, turning her attention back to the other women. "Ladies, are we ready?"

"Hell yeah!" Michelle Parish exclaimed enthusiastically, already on her second glass of wine. "Crack the champagne so that we can get this party started!"

[][][]

"Goodnight stars, goodnight air, goodnight noises everywhere." His voice was a soft, deep rumble; lulling the baby warm against his chest to sleep. Rick glanced down at his daughter and smiled tenderly as he studied her little face. Her eyes were closed, her small mouth open and her features relaxed, deep in slumber.

She looked like her mother. Like his wife. Like their Kate.

"Goodnight, baby girl," he said quietly, closing the story book. He bent down and pressed a lingering kiss against her forehead, still rocking rhythmically in the rocking chair. After a few moments, he stood up and carefully placed Lizzy in her crib, running a large hand affectionately over her skull.

"You're growing up too fast, baby bird. Remember, you and your old man have an agreement," he murmured, before bending down and placing another kiss on top of his daughter's head.

Rick stood up and sighed, catching sight of a framed picture on the small bedside table next to her crib. It was a photo of his whole family - Alexis, Lizzy, Kate and himself; one taken at the zoo the last time Alexis was in town. His three girls were in a close embrace, his eldest daughter and Kate wrapped around each other, with eye-crinkling smiles while Lizzy was in between them, babbling happily in her mother's arms. He was standing behind them, his arms slung over Alexis and Kate's shoulders, grinning like a fool.

Ah, good times.

_'Maybe Nikki needs to get pregnant.'_

[][][]

"Lanie, where are you going? They're waiting-"

Her friend was acting weird, darting up and grabbing her hand and dragging her along before they could toast her upcoming nuptials. Yeah, so not Lanie Parish.

"Girl, just... listen. You gotta help me out," the M.E. said, pushing the tall detective into the ladies' restroom.

Kate's brow furrowed. "What are you talking about?"

Lanie locked the door before turning back to face her friend, wringing her hands nervously.

_Locking_ the door? Okay, now she was seriously concerned. Help her out with what? Was she getting cold-

"Kate, I... I'm pregnant."

Oh.

_Oh. _Wow.

The dark-haired beauty gaped at her friend, mouth open, eyes wide and large. And then she smiled, her whole face alight and beaming. Lanie let out a shaky breath and returned a broad smile.

Kate moved forward, one, two steps and enveloped the petite woman in a fierce hug, both women feeling emotions bubbling out.

"You're pregnant," Kate said softly, reverently, stepping back a few paces.

Lanie wiped at her eyes and let out a watery chuckle. "Guess you got your wish, Detective. Lizzy will be having a playmate soon."

"When did you find out?"

"Uh, about two days ago."

"How far?"

"Not sure yet, but I'm guessing about five to six weeks."

"And Esposito? Does he know?"

The M.E. ducked her head and smiled softly. "Yeah. He is the only one, besides me and you, who knows." She looked back at the detective. "Oh, Kate, he's so excited. I had to stop him from going out and buying a football."

Kate grinned and shook her head. "I bet he his. He's gonna be great, you're gonna be great. Oh my word, an Esplanie baby!" She squealed, literally _squealed_.

The other women laughed. "Seriously? An Esplanie baby? Writer Boy has definitely rubbed off on you."

"Oh, believe me, you have no idea how much he has," Kate murmured with a slow, sly smile.

"Definitely did _not_ need to know that."

Kate chuckled quietly before embracing her friend again. "Lanie, I'm so happy for you. And Espo. You two are going to be fantastic parents."

"Thanks, girl," Lanie replied before breaking the embrace.

"Wait. What did you mean when you said that you needed my help?"

Lanie bit her lip. "Look I don't want anyone else to know about this yet. And this being my bachelorette and all, if I'm not throwing back tequila shots-"

Of course. Duh.

"-people will start getting suspicious and start asking questions."

"Exactly... So I'm gonna need someone to _take care_ of my drinks."

Take care of her drinks?

Kate's eyes grew wider. "Oh. O-okay." She was already dreading the hangover that would follow her act of kindness. "But you owe me, Dr. Parish."

Lanie smiled, teasing. "Dr. Esposito, Detective _Castle_."

Kate snorted. "_Detective_ Beckett, _Mrs._ Castle. Get your titles right, _Mrs._ Esposito."

[][][]

It was past midnight and Nikki was in the middle of cracking a serial killer case with Rook by her side, of course. Nikki getting pregnant was not on the cards... yet. He was just finishing the scene where she had been lured to the maniac's lair when Rick heard the sound of the door opening and feet stumbling into the foyer.

Stumbling? Huh. That was... strange. Kate never-

Wait, was that _giggling_? She definitely did not giggle. Unless...

Before he could get up, his slightly intoxicated and giggling (giggling!) wife came through his office door. She spotted him and unfurled a slow, teasing, sexy smile while watching him from under her lashes.

"Hiiii, Baby."

Oh wow.

He cleared his throat, watching her strut (so hot!) towards him. A lioness, a tigress stalking her prey.

Holy shit.

"Uh, hey Honey."

She slowly, a little shakily, made her way towards him. "Sooo? What're you doin'?" His lips flickered at her slurring, but resisted the amused smile that wanted to escape.

She slid her arms up his chest and around his neck, stepping closer, her chest pressing against him. "Just- just writing. And waiting for you," he managed.

"You wait'd f'r me?" She asked all too innocently, pouting her lips and batting (_batting!_) her eyelashes at him.

Rick returned a smile. "Of course, Babe."

Kate stepped closer, her hair tickling his cheek. "Don't call me 'Babe'," she murmured, nuzzling her nose with his, squeezing his neck.

He chuckled softly. "Whatever you say, Beckett." Before she could respond, his mouth was on hers - demanding, insistent, hungry. He could taste the champagne, the vodka, tequila on her tongue. But she's intoxicating. He's drunk with her, because of her. His head, his world was spinning by the time she hooked a long leg around his and pressed her hips against his insistently.

His legs were jelly, knees giving in.

They're both breathless, thrumming with need when they broke apart.

"'Tis Officer Beckett to you, Misstterrr," she pants, still slurring, but alert now. A little bit more sober. He was about to capture her lips again when she disappeared from his arms. Her eyes were wide, dark, sparkling with mischief and something.. dare he say? _naughty_.

"Kate?" He queried as she slowly retreated out of his office.

She was grinning at him, dangerously, a femme fatale. Like she had a secret that he had to discover. A delicious secret.

"Give me ten minutes." He is instructed in a low, throaty voice. A voice dripping with liquid heat, with sex.

Ten minutes.

It shocks his system. A bolt of lighting, a lick of fire. Jolting him, leaving him breathless with anticipation. Because when Kate gets adventurous, his world usually explodes.

Among other things. . .

[][][]

_Officer Beckett._

His jaw was probably somewhere on the floor. Along with all coherent thought. How was he supposed to think with his brain when she was prancing around in her cop (_cop!_) uniform; just the black shirt and hat? And while she was wearing his favourite pair of black lace panties and a pair of sexy heels, showing off her toned legs? Way too sexy for her own good.

He was going to die. Rick Castle was going to die due to an overdose of arousal.

She smirked at him, her eyes filled with equal measures of mirth and heat. "See somethin' ya like, Castle?" She was more sober, more in control now than a few minutes before.

He couldn't move. _Literally_ couldn't move. His pants were too tight, his mouth dry, his legs heavy. "Uh..."

She walked towards him, torturing him with the seductive sway of her hips. He gulped. "Cat caught your tongue?"

"Nice outfit," Rick quipped, proud to be able to put together a string of words. Her smile only grew more devious as she reached back and pulled out a pair of fluffy handcuffs.

He was going to faint.

She stepped into his personal space, in between his parted legs, the handcuffs dangling teasingly from her fingers.

"I promised you a show, didn't I?" She breathed into his ear, hot and eager and spine-tingling.

He could only nod dumbly, clenching his fists; feeling the blood race through his veins. Uninhibited, scorching, primal lust.

Kate molded her lithe body further into his, a hand trailing up his chest, playing teasingly with the buttons of his shirt.

"Well, Mr. Castle, is there something you want to confess before I take you... _downtown_?"

She was going to kill him.

[][][]

_I'm a natural ma'am_  
_Doin' all I can_  
_My temperature is runnin' high_

_Talking's fine_  
_If you got the time_  
_But I ain't got the time to spare_  
_Yeah_

_Do you wanna touch (Yeah)_  
_Do you wanna touch (Yeah)_  
_Do you wanna touch me there, where_  
_Do you wanna touch (Yeah)_  
_Do you wanna touch (Yeah)_

* * *

**A/N: That was fun to write. Even if there wasn't much of a plot; it's always fun to write sexy Caskett. And I've always imagined that Beckett could put her cop uniform to good use. **

**'Nway, let me know what ya think? Good, bad, meh?**

**Title of the chapter is an Elvis song and lyrics at the end from 'Do you want to touch me.'**

**Apologies for any mistakes that there may be.**


	34. Chapter 34

**A/N: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews and the story alerts and story favourites. Without it, this story would not be here. This chapter follows from the last one. Pointless Caskett fluff. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Only Baby Castle is mine.**

* * *

**Chapter 34 - Whole Wide World**

"Agghh, I'm _never_ drinking again."

A beat of silence.

"Or have hot, wild, fantasy sex when you're plastered?" Rick smirked and waggled his eyebrows. "Thank you, by the way."

She groaned and turned on her back away from him, a hand covering her eyes.

"Shut up, Castle."

"What?" He turned on his side closer to her, a large grin adorning his features. "Really, _thank you_. You have no idea how long I've had that particular fantasy."

Kate lifted her hand and glanced at him, amusement flickering in her eyes. "Why am I not surprised?" She muttered. After a few moments she started to sit up, clutching the sheet to her chest.

Her husband also sat up, his brow furrowing. "Whoa, where are you going?"

She turned to look at him, her face pale, hair in disarray and eyes a little dull.

Nonetheless, still beautiful.

"Rick, even though I find your body irresistible and even though I love you, I don't have the energy _or _stamina _or _desire for round three right now." She slid her feet onto the floor, her legs feeling wobbly from exertion. Orgasmic exertion. "And I really _do_ have a headache."

He chuckled and gently pulled her back into bed. "Castle!"

"I'm flattered, Babe, but I'm not looking for round three. Just – stay here, I'll go make you something to eat and get you some aspirin, okay?"

She sighed, feeling the insistent pounding against the inside of her skull. "'Kay."

He placed a smacking kiss on her cheek and climbed out of bed, pulling on his boxers. Kate laid back down, an arm slung over her eyes.

"Lizzy?" She asked softly, still a concerned mother.

Rick smiled tenderly as he watched her, hung-over and grumpy and naked in his bed. His wife. _Wife._ Mother of his child. He walked over to her side and sat down, a large hand on her sheet-clad thigh. Drawing soothing, pleasant, distracting patterns.

"I'll go check on her. I'm sure she's fine, though. It's only seven now."

Kate removed her arm and smiled tenderly. "Thanks, Honey."

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "Sure thing... Snookums."

"_Castle_," she whined, a weary laugh bubbling out.

"Or would you prefer Snooki? You're both pretty good at partying."

Kate started to laugh, but it soon turned into a grimace. "Ow, my head. Stop that." She turned onto her side and dragged a pillow over her pounding head.

He was wearing a shit-eating grin. "Whatever you want, Officer Beckett."

Another groan. "Shut up."

[][][]

He was humming. Well, actually whistling and humming and even singing a little.

_I've got you under my skin. _

You have no idea, Frank Sinatra. No. Freakin'. Idea.

He made pancakes (thank you _so _much) and was currently searching for some of the strongest aspirins they had. His mother's experience and pharmaceutical expertise would come in handy right about now. He should call-

And there she was.

In yoga pants and her black uniform shirt she stripteased out of oh-so-slowly last night (or this morning). He's_ never_, _ever_ going to forget Officer Beckett. Now they just needed to get her a sexy nurse outfit...

Hot damn.

Her hair was still in disarray, eyes squinting against the light and brow furrowed adorably. She let out a yawn and rubbed at her eyes.

"Why the hell is it so bright in here?" Kate grumbled.

He pursed his lips to keep from laughing. "Hey. I thought you were gonna stay in bed until I brought you breakfast."

"Mmm, your singing lured me," she shot back, plopping down on the stool and dropping her head in her hands. "Castle, everything _huuurrrttsss_," Kate whined, sounding oddly like a toddler about to go crazy.

He threw back his head and laughed. When he glanced at her, she was glaring at him with glassy, red eyes.

She looked like an angry little girl. That was what he was reminded of. He imagined a tiny, foot-stomping Kate, brows furrowed, arms crossed and jaw set.

Too cute.

Was Lizzy going to be this adorably cross with him in the future when he teased her? He couldn't wait to find out.

"This isn't funny."

He smiled broadly. "It is."

"You're an ass."

He chuckled again, walking over to her with a plate of pancakes. He slid the plate in front of her and pressed a kiss against her temple. "Am I an ass now?" He whispered into her ear.

Kate's lips quirked. "No. Just annoying." She turned to him, draped her arms over his shoulders and kissed him soundly. "An annoying, wonderful, infuriating, handsome husband."

"And unforgettable sex god," he murmured, his lips against hers.

She chuckled softly. "Yeah. You rock my world, Mr. Castle."

"Such a fan girl, Mrs. Castle."

"_Your_ fan girl," she murmured before kissing him softly again.

"Eat your pancakes. I'll make us some coffee," he whispered before releasing her.

She sighed. "'Kay."

They ate in silence for a few moments before Kate suddenly jerked her head up and looked at him with wide eyes.

He immediately knew that look.

She started to get off the stool. "Shit, I'm so out of it, I didn't even check! Lizzy-"

"-Is fine, Kate. Still sleeping. She got to bed later than usual last night."

She relaxed and returned to her seat, a little deflated. "Oh."

"Don't worry, Mommy, I've got the baby monitor right here."

Kate smiled at him, lifting an eyebrow; heat suddenly in her gaze. "Thanks, _Daddy_."

Oh hello, look who's back.

"You're such a tease."

She leaned forward, biting her lower lip. "And you're such a stud."

He swallowed hard. "Officer Beckett, if it weren't for your hangover, we'd be having round three on the kitchen counter right about now."

She laughed and then winced. "Damn it, Castle!" She lifted a hand to her head, her eyes shut tightly. "Can I get my pills now?"

Rick stifled a laugh and nodded. "Yes, Dear."

"Remind me to never ever go to a bacholerette again._ Ever_."

He smirked and handed her two tablets and a glass of water. "Yes, Dear."

She popped the pills in her mouth and gulped down the water, fixing him with another deflated glare.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"No, of course not." His grin grew wider, belying his statement.

She punched him in the arm. "Liar."

"Ow. Okay, fine. So I find it a little amusing that my always-in-control-by-the-book-type-A detective wife got plastered. It's funny."

"Well, I'm glad to be your source of entertainment."

So sour.

"Babe, at least you weren't caught drunk and totally naked on a police horse... while a group tourists snapped pictures of your family jewels."

Kate rewarded him with a chuckle. "Oh, I'd pay good money to see _that_."

Rick flashed her a dirty grin, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "I bet you would... perv. But you don't need to though." He stepped closer to her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "For you, it's an all access pass. Anytime - free of charge."

She returned a slow, sly smile. "Mmm, good to know." She kissed him, but broke away before her eager husband got carried away. "But, I think, Kitten, that I'm gonna take a rain check on that free pass for now." She patted his cheek. "I'm going to take a shower and then come and lounge with you and my daughter for the rest of the day while recovering. Sound good, Mr. Castle?"

He was grinning goofily at her. "No complaints here, Mrs. Castle."

[][][]

"Look who's up, Mommy."

When Lizzy saw her more sober and freshly showered mother, she squealed and desperately held out her chubby arms to Kate. The littlest Castle was dressed in her pink Unicorn shirt and baby jeans, wearing a beaming four-tooth grin dimpling her round, rosy cheeks.

An adorable, fat, little cherub.

Kate laughed, feeling her heart flutter a little at her baby's delight in seeing her. She walked over to Rick and scooped up her daughter, squeezed her and gave her a smacking kiss. Lizzy's only response was to burrow into her mother's embrace, her baby hands grasping Kate's shirt tightly.

Oh, how was she _ever_ going to be able to go back to work?

"Hey, beautiful girl. Did you and Daddy have fun last night?"

"Of course we did. We always have fun. Isn't that right, Sweet Pea?" Rick said with a grin, pulling off his shirt and walking to the bathroom. His wife wasn't paying attention to what he was saying as she followed him with her eyes all the way, unable to help herself. She had him twice already, but felt her blood stir again.

"Stop checking me out, perv. Our daughter is present."

Kate blinked and huffed out a laugh; caught with her hand in the cookie jar. A very nice cookie jar. With broad shoulders, strong arms and a gorgeous, _gorgeous_ ass.

_Mmmhmm._

She sighed and glanced at her daughter, who's tiny baby hands were still clutching at her shirt; her head nestled in the crook of her mother's neck. A little clingy today, a little subdued. Kate frowned and brushed her fingers across Lizzy's forehead, but finding nothing out of the ordinary.

Huh.

She kissed her daughter's head and hugged her tighter. "Come on Sweetie, let's go get you some breakfast."

Fifteen minutes later Kate was sprawled out on the carpet next to her almost one-year old, watching her baby play happily with Snuggles, as always, close by. The little girl gave occasional shrieks of delight and babbled as she flailed her arms around excitedly, fluffy toys held in each one. Her earlier subdued mood and clinginess apparently gone.

Kate propped up her elbow and rested her head in her hand, her mind starting to wander to images of Lizzy, Little Esplanie and the two Ryans playing like this or running around on the beach in the Hamptons or dressing up for Halloween-

"Oh, what's this? My two girls playing without me?"

Kate turned around and grinned at her husband as he sank down next to her. "Wouldn't dream of it, Daddy," she murmured as he leaned over her. His eyes darkened slightly and his grin grew wolfish; residual arousal still present after their night of fantasy sex.

"Good to know, Mommy." He gave her a slow, lazy kiss befitting of a Sunday morning. "Sweet Pea, get ready for the... tickle monster!"

He leaped over his wife and grabbed his baby girl, tickling her sides and stomach and blowing raspberries in her neck. Lizzy shrieked and giggled, her little hands on her father's cheeks. Rick turned on his back, his shoulder brushing against Kate. She watched them, a large smile blooming over her features. She moved closer to his side, molding into him and laying her head on his shoulder. Rick, with a beaming mega-watt smile, glanced at her as Lizzy bounced excitedly on his stomach. Kate returned a smile and leaned up to kiss his cheek.

She loved watching him being a father. Absolutely adored it. Adored _him_. Her daughter, her family.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you."

"Mmm?" He responded distractedly, still tickling their squealing little cherub baby.

"Lizzy is getting a playmate."

Rick whipped his head around, his eyes wide and his lips parted in surprise. What now? It couldn't be, could it? Kate was on birth control and they'd been using-

"Not me, you idiot," his wife grumbled, half-annoyed and half-amused.

Oh. Yeah. _Duh_. She was totally plastered last night. Completely out of it.

He gave her a sheepish smile. "Oh, right. Sorry." He was feeling bizarrely disappointed. He knew there was no chance of another one soon. Absolutely not on the cards. Kate was going back to work soon and Lizzy wasn't even a year old and he had books-

Wait. Lizzy was getting a playmate?

"Lizzy is getting a playmate?"

Kate smiled and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, Castle... Lanie is pregnant. She told me last night. And I had to cover for her-"

"-Hence your state of... _cheeriness_." He grinned.

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah."

"Took one for the team, huh?"

"Totally. She owes me big time... But providing Lizzy with a playmate makes up for it."

Wow. Lizzy was getting a playmate. He was going to be-

"I'm gonna be an uncle!"

Like a kid in a candy store. Adorable, _adorable_ man.

His wife laughed and gave him a sweet kiss. "Yes, Writer Boy, you are going to be an uncle. Congratulations."

"That's awesome!"

"I know right?"

He let Lizzy crawl over to her toys and turned his attention to Kate.

"They're going to be great parents."

Kate sighed and slowly traced a hand over his chest. "Yeah. I know." She let out a laugh. "Lanie says that Esposito is so excited, he already went out and bought a football."

Rick laughed. "Sounds like something he would do."

"Mmm."

They lay in silence for a few moments, their attention on Lizzy who was playing contently next to her parents. "You remember the first thing I bought after we found out? Even before we knew she was a girl?" His voice was soft, reminiscent.

A smile slowly spread over her features. "Yeah." Kate lifted her head to look at her husband. "That ridiculous little cop outfit."

"Ridiculously _cute_ little cop outfit. It's the perfect costume for Halloween."

Kate rolled her eyes, her smile growing. "You're going to use our daughter as bait to get candy, aren't you?"

"Of course not," he huffed. "I'm using her _and_ my irresistible charms."

"You're only allowed to use those _irresistible charms_ on me, Castle," she murmured before kissing his jaw.

"With pleasure, Officer Beckett," he whispered into her ear, placing a kiss high on her cheekbone.

"And I assume you would like to have a repeat performance of Officer Beckett on Hallow's Eve?"

His grin grew devilish. "Not just on Hallow's Eve, my dear Detective."

"On your birthday as well?"

He grinned at her.

"And Thanksgiving."

"Labour Day."

"Independence Day."

"Valentine's Day."

"Anniversary."

She nodded. "Anniversary."

They grinned at each other.

Kate fiddled with the buttons of his shirt, lifting an eyebrow. Sexy, sultry minx of a woman.

"So, Mr. Castle, do you only want Officer Beckett or should I whip out my naughty nurse outfit on occasion?"

His eyes nearly popped out of his head. "You- you have a... a naughty nurse outfit?" Breathless with excitement, his voice pitching higher than usual.

Kate laughed and patted his cheek. "Soooo easy, Castle."

"Tease."

"Stud." She kissed his pout away.

He groaned. "You're killing me."

"You love it."

"I do." He agreed easily, smiling at his wife. "And I love you too."

Just then a baby hand slapped against his face, grabbing a fistful of his cheek. Rick snatched his daughter and lifted her up, little baby giggles bubbling out.

"And you too, Sweet Pea!" He placed a smacking kiss against her round, rosy cheek. "You're getting a playmate, baby girl!"

Kate laughed. "She already has one."

Rick turned to look at her, mischievous glint in his eyes. "And so does Mommy."

She returned a sly grin. "Mmhmm. I really like my playmate."

He leaned brushed a barely-there-kiss against her lips. "Good, because can Kate come out and play?"

[][][]

_And I'm in_  
_So totally wrapped up_

_Emotionally attracted_  
_So physically active_

_So recklessly I need you_  
_So desperately sure as the sky is blue_

_Baby I love you_  
_I love you_

* * *

**A/N: This kind of just went on. No real plan, just some fluff. Lemme know what you think.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title is a cute Wreckless Eric song 'Whole Wide World' and the lyrics at the end from Martina McBride's song 'I love you.'**


	35. Chapter 35

**A/N: Ladies and gents... I'm on vacation! Well, sort of. That means that I have more time to spend writing fanfic - yay! Now this little piece is just something that popped into my head after watching 'Eye of the Beholder' which was great by the way. I believe you can deduce from the title what this is about. P.S. I am definitely planning on writing Esplanie's wedding, Kate's return to the precinct (which is _way_ overdue) and of course, Lizzy's first b-day. That's what's up the pipeline.**

**Until then, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Nope, don't own it now. Never will.**

* * *

**Chapter 35 - Hey Jealousy**

That vein in her forehead was standing out, she was grinding her teeth and her knuckles were turning white as her grip tightened on Lizzy's pram. If she had a dollar for every time she heard-

"Oh Mr. Castle, I'm your biggest fan. Would you mind signing my-"

_She better not say chest._

"-book."

_Ah. Good._

Rick smiled tightly, yet still charming and nodded. "Sure, no problem." He placed their coffees on the counter and briefly glanced in her direction where she stood a few feet away, apology evident in his eyes.

It wasn't Rick's fault. It really wasn't.

Kate sighed. No point of getting a table here now, they will have to-

"I've been a fan of your work for such a long time. I can't believe I'm meeting you." She heard the over-eager fan say.

Oh. Brother.

Kate rolled her eyes and huffed out an annoyed breath. Rick only smiled tightly and asked the woman her name. It was a 'Lucy' or 'Lisa' or something.

"You're even more handsome in real life than on the book covers," the woman continued with an irritating little grin.

Kate narrowed her eyes. Really? That's her line?

Oh. _Brother._

Rick forced out a laugh. "Thank you. My wife tends to agree." The smile dropped from the woman's face. "Well, here you go, Linda. Have a nice day."

"Uh, thank- thank you," _Linda_ stuttered.

Rick grabbed their coffees and made his way over to his two girls; a large, beaming smile splitting his handsome features.

"Grand skim latte, two pumps, sugar-free vanilla." She slowly shook her head and smiled at him; softly, affectionately.

He got that adorably confused look on his face. "Wh-what?"

She took the cup and her smile widened. "Nothing, Castle. Just... thank you for the coffee." Kate leaned up and kissed his cheek. "C'mon, let's go."

"You don't want to sit here?"

"Nah, I want to take our daughter for a stroll." She glanced at him as they made their way to the exit; side by side, both with a hand on Lizzy's pram. "Besides, we might be mobbed by your fans."

She was only teasing. Really, no hard feelings.

He cringed. "Sorry about that."

"Not your fault, Castle. You can't help it that you're irresistible and that women tend to _flock_ to you."

Okay, maybe a bit of teasing with a hint of possessive jealousy. Just maybe.

He watched her, carefully trying to gauge his wife's mood. She seemed relatively relaxed despite the thinly veiled annoyance in her tone. His lips quirked. "Do I detect a hint of jealousy, Mrs. Castle?"

Kate rolled her eyes. "Oh puhlease, Writer Boy. We've had this conversation many times before. I don't get jealous."

Liar, liar pants on fire.

His grin got wider. "Yeah, sure. Whatever you say, Kate." He bumped his hip with hers. "Remember Serena Kaye?"

[][][]

_"Well, Mr. Castle. Detective Beckett. It has been a delightful pleasure," Serena Kaye said, smiling broadly, bearing her teeth; all the while keeping her eyes on Rick._

_Kate stuck out her hand, grabbing the woman's attention. "Thank you for your assistance Ms. Kaye. Goodbye and all the best." The 'Now get the hell out of here' left unsaid._

_"Thank you." The blonde bombshell turned her attention back to an oblivious Rick. "Mr. Castle, keep in touch."_

_What the-_

_Rick laughed and shook her hand. "Only if I need some advice on a piece of art. Goodbye, Ms. Kaye." _

_Kate crossed her arms and resisted the urge to roll her eyes. _

_"Goodbye." With that the sexy insurance investigator walked off._

_Kate sat down at her desk, a little sour and irritated._

_"Well, another murderer behind bars. Another victory for justice," Rick said with a large grin, plopping down in his chair beside his girlfriend's (girlfriend!) desk while she did the dreaded paperwork._

_"Mm."_

_'Mm' was her only response? Maybe just tired._

_He waited a few moments, watching her; the way she nibbled on her lip, the way her hair fell over her cheekbone and curled around her jaw, the hollow of her throat where he marked her the other night-_

_His lips quirked. "So… dinner at my place or your place?" _

_He wanted to mark her again. Yum._

_Kate only returned a shrug, brow furrowed and eyes boring into the file in front of her._

_Silence._

_"Kate?"_

_"What, Castle?" Biting. Annoyed. Pissed._

_Huh? _

_Okay. Let's try this again._

_"Dinner. My place or your place?"_

_Finally, she looked up at him. "Actually… I just wanna go home, take a bubble bath, drink a glass of wine and go to bed."_

_Ah. He grinned. Rick Castle could do that. So very, _very_ well. "Want me to join you, Detective?"_

_She avoided his eyes and sighed. "Not tonight."_

_His brow furrowed as well as he regarded her._ _Not tonight? What the hell did that mean?_

_He leaned towards her, his voice low. "Kate, what's wrong?"_

_Immediately: "Nothing."_

_"This doesn't sound like nothing."_

_She sighed again, threading a hand through her hair and looked up at him. "I'm just tired, okay?" That sounded like a lie._

_He set his jaw, not expecting her rejection to sting quite so much. "Of what? Me?" He tried to joke feebly._

_She glared at him. "God, Castle. What's with the insecurity?" Kate said, getting up from her chair._

_He shot up and followed her to the break room; anger swiftly rising. "What has gotten into you?" He asked once inside._

_She glanced at him, suddenly weary. "Nothing. I told you that I'm tired."_

_He softened, moving towards where she was at the espresso machine. "Then let me take you home." He brushed a hand against her waist, stepping in behind her; his chest touching her back. "Eat something, relax-"_

_"And also help you to scratch an itch? Thanks, but no thanks. You can take care of that yourself, Rick."_

_______She was irritated. Irritated about how long her paperwork was taking. Irritated about how little sleep she had gotten the last few days. Irritated by the sexy, leggy blonde who had zoomed in on her man. _

_______The nerve of that woman... Being all flirty and sexy with her guy. Her, Kate Beckett's, guy. Man. Writer Man._

_He immediately retreated, stung. "Excuse me?"_

_But she was on a roll. "Or better yet - why don't you invite your new fan, Serena, over? I'm sure she will be more than willing to assist. You two seemed to get along just fine."_

_Wait. What? Wait a minute-_

_She was jealous? Kate Smokin' Hot Beckett was _jealous?_ Sure Serena Kay, art insurance investigator a.k.a former art thief, was sexy. But seriously? _

_No competition._

_He laughed, literally burst out laughing. His heart eased with relief and sudden amusement. She glared at him and Rick couldn't help but find her scowl and the way she folded her arms around herself adorable._

_"What's so funny, Castle?"_

_He stepped closer again, making sure to trap her against the counter. "Babe, c'mon. Really? You're jealous?"_

_Her frown deepened and her fury just got more endearing. "Don't call me babe," she grumbled sourly. He chuckled and tugged her closer. "And I'm_ not_ jealous."_

_"Sure. Keeping telling yourself that, Detective." He grinned and kissed her cheek while she continued to wear a glower; more annoyed now at being caught out than jealous._

_"Yeah, well I saw the way she was looking at you. The way she was acting around you."_

_"So?"_

_Kate glared at him. "She was practically throwing herself at you._ And_ undressing you with her eyes."_

_He hugged her and planted a few kisses in her hair, still grinning. "Maybe so, but I kept my eyes on you the whole time."_

_She rolled her eyes. "Smooth... and cheesy, Mr. Castle."_

_He grinned and kissed her. __"Of course I was imagining you naked. In the shower. All soapy and-"_

_She punched his arm. _

_"Ow!"_

_"You're so full of it."_

_"What?" He responded, rubbing his arm. "It's true."_

_"Rick," she admonished in a longsuffering tone. _

_"Naturally, in my frequent daytime fantasies - where you are in the shower, naked and wet - I'm there with you and we-"_

_She silenced him with a kiss, hot and fast. "Shut up and take me home, Castle."_

_He grinned like the Cheshire cat. "It would be my pleasure, Detective."_

[][][]

"See? You were totally jealous." They were walking arm-in-arm through Central Park, the late afternoon sun warm and soothing. Their daughter sound asleep, her head lolling against the seat.

Adorable cherub baby.

Kate ducked her head, her lips tilting. "Yeah, okay. Fine, I was. Could you blame me though?"

Her husband grinned and kissed her temple. "Babe-"

"-Don't call me that."

"-c'mon. No competition. You won hands down." He turned to look at her; his expression suddenly tender. "You always win hands down."

She leaned up and kissed him; a barely-there brush of her lips. It made his knees weak, his heart skipping a beat. His gorgeous, _gorgeous_ wife did that.

Kate did that.

"Good to know, Mr. Castle." She smiled, alight with beauty.

_His_ Kate.

They walked in silence for a while, Kate checking a few times to see if Lizzy was still asleep. After a few minutes they found a park bench and sat down, arms still linked and watching the people passing by.

"You do too, you know."

Rick turned to his wife, confused. "What?"

"Win hands down."

He grinned and kissed her. "I know," he responded with a shrug. "I've had you from the get-go."

Kate sat up and raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?"

His crooked smile widened. So infuriatingly sexy. "Yeah."

"Awfully confident there, Mr. Castle."

"So? I always knew we'd get together. And now look at us." He gestured between them. "We're married with a kid." He leaned in and brushed a kiss against her cheek. "Look like I was right," her murmured into her ear.

"Touché, Castle, touché," Kate conceded softly, nodding her head. "But that still doesn't mean you didn't have your doubts. Your moments of uncertainty. Your fits of jealousy."

He sat back, brow furrowing. "Fits of jealousy?"

She grinned knowingly. "Oh yeah. You think I didn't notice?"

He sighed, placing an arm around her and pulling her closer. "Fine. Yes, there were times - brief instances - where I got jealous. I admit it."

_I'm jealous. There - I said it. I want you all to myself._

She smiled and leaned in to him, kissing his cheek. "Remember Special Agent Jones?"

[][][]

_"Alright people, you know the drill. __Our informant said that Calzone will be there at nine. _Agent Jones and Detective Beckett will stake out the bar. The plan is to..."

_Rick wasn't listening anymore. He didn't want to listen anymore. He wanted to go with her. On an undercover mission. While she was wearing_ that_ red dress. But the Feebs were on point on this mission and, well, everything the NYPD suggested was overruled. Except for Detective Beckett's 'special involvement' - a.k.a playing the role of Agent Jones' sexy, leggy arm candy._

_Ugh. Not cool._

_He could feel himself pouting like a petulant five-year old. _

_"...The rest of us will be monitoring the situation. When we have everything we need, we'll move in on Calzone." Rick glanced towards where Kate, being all hot in her tight red dress, was standing next to Montgomery and Agent Douche Bag, a tall, dark and handsome fella. "Let's make this a clean, quick operation people." She caught his eye for a moment before turning her attention back to Jones who was saying something to her. Leaning a little too close for the writer's liking. __But whatever. He was a jealous guy. He really wasn't._

_Rick sighed, pushed off the desk, his eyes never leaving Kate, and walked to the break room. __A minute or two later, he saw her out of the corner of his eye; high heels, endless legs, tight dress that hugged all of her curves. Except, this time he wasn't enjoying it so much._

_"Hey," she greeted softly._

_"Hey." He turned to her with a small smile. "You ready to go?"_

_"Mmhmm." She walked up to him, biting her lip enticingly. "Well... how do I look?"_

_He sighed, turning his attention back to the espresso machine. He wanted to grab and kiss her senseless, but he couldn't because they were at the precinct filled with officers, detectives and, of course, FBI agents. And that irritated him. Immensely. _

_"Why don't you ask Agent Jones? It matters to him, doesn't it?" _

_Bitter, bitter boy._

_Kate pursed her lips to stop from laughing. "Maybe. But I want your opinion. Besides, he already said that I looked really, really hot." _

_Rick's head snapped up and he stared at her, eyes blazing and nostrils flaring; his inner caveman rising._

_She stepped closer and grinned. "I'm kidding, Castle. My, aren't we jealous?"_

_"I'm not," he mumbled, frowning._

_"Mm, sure." Suddenly she grew serious. "Look, Rick, I know that you want to go with the team, but I don't think it's such a good idea-"_

_"What?" He immediately shook his head. "No. I'm going, Kate."_

_She sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Castle, this is going to be dangerous, okay? Just let..."_

_He was already a little pissed at the fact that another guy was all over his girl. "Just let what? The real cops handle this?"_

_"Please, you know that is _not_ what I meant."_

_"Then what did you mean, _Detective_?" _

_They stared at each other for a few moments before Special Agent Jones stepped into the break room. "Beckett, you ready? We need to go." He glanced between the two lovers, picking up on the tension. _

_"Uh, yeah. I'll be there in a minute," Kate responded, turning to face the other man. Jones smiled, nodded and walked away. She turned back to Rick. "Listen, I'll see you later, okay?"_

_He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair. "Yeah, I'll be here. Waiting." He sighed. "Doesn't mean I want to though."_

_"I know. But do this for me. Please." __Kate stepped closer and intertwined their hands loosely. _

___He nodded, rubbing a thumb over the back of her hand._

___Kate lifted a hand to his face, gently stroking his jaw. "_I love you."

_He smiled. "I love you too, Babe." _

_"Don't call me that," she grumbled before claiming his mouth in a searing kiss. _

_"Go catch some bad guys, Detective."_

_Two and a half hours later..._

_It was late and he was dozing off on the break room couch. Never really falling asleep; he couldn't. His partner was in a dangerous, undercover mission, but luckily Ryan and Esposito were giving him regular updates. In fact, about twenty minutes ago they informed him that the mission had been-_

_Suddenly, there were footsteps and voices. Rick started to get up, but stopped when he heard Agent Douche Bag speak._

_"Well, Detective Beckett, it has been a pleasure working with you."_

_Rick stood and moved to the window, watching the interaction at her desk curiously._

_Kate glanced at Jones and smiled. "Yeah. I'd say mission accomplished and a job well done. Everyone got what they wanted." She put her hand out towards the agent. He took it and smiled._

_"Yeah, maybe," Jones responded, __watching their intertwined hands for a moment before looking at her again._

_A certain writer did not like the way he was holding her hand. Or the way he was looking at her. In that dress. _

_Sex-on-legs._

_"You know, if you ever get tired of that writer of yours." She had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. "Give me a call."_

_Seriously? Oh. _Brother_. _

_Kate removed her hand. "I'm flattered, Agent Jones, but-" A large smile spread out and enveloped her features "-I'm very happy with that writer of mine."_

_He wanted to break out and do the happy dance. _

_Jones nodded and smiled lopsidedly. "Worth a try, though. Well, it was a pleasure... Goodnight, Detective."_

_"Goodnight Agent Jones."_

_Kate watched him walk away before turning back to her desk. "You can come out now, Castle."_

_How did she-_

_Rick stepped out and smiled sheepishly. "Hey."_

_She was fighting a grin. "You were listening, weren't you?"_

_He scratched his head and walked towards her. "Uh, um. Yeah, a little bit."_

_"Mmm," she responded, lips quirking._

_He cleared his throat. "So I take it you got the guy."_

_"Yeah. Ryan and Esposito are booking him now. The rest of the team is busy wrapping things up at the location."_

_"Oh, good. That's... good." He pushed his hands into his pockets, swaying slightly; Kate watched him closely. He was burning to make a comment._

_She rolled her eyes. "Just spit it out, Castle."_

_He grinned. "I make you very happy, huh?"_

_She softened, smiled and stepped closer. "Yeah. Yeah, you do, Rick." His smile faltered at her sincerity, her affection. Kate placed a hand on his chest. "You make me very happy."_

_Before he could reply, her mouth enclosed his. Soft and sure, leaving no doubt where her loyalties lie. Where her heart would always be._

_"Ditto, by the way," he responded after they broke apart. He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her close and kissing the side of her head. They stood like that for a few quiet moments. "I can't believe Agent Douche Bag asked you out." Kate laughed and stepped out of his embrace. "I knew he was hitting on from the start, but jeez. What an idiot. Just another reason not to like the Feds."_

_She smiled at his jealous tirade. It was kinda cute._

_"Not even Mulder and Scully?"_

_He frowned. "Well... they don't count. They're fictional characters."_

_She raised an eyebrow. "Oh. What about the lovely Agent Shaw?"_

_He grinned. "Okay, yeah. Fine, I like some of them. Especially if they have awesome toys."_

_She rolled her eyes, not able to stop the smile. "I'm dating a twelve year-old."_

_He grinned. "Let me take you home and disprove that statement."_

_She ignored him, grabbed her phone and clicked off her desk light._

_"C'mon, Writer Boy. I wanna kick off my shoes and get out of this dress."_

_His grin grew devilish, a twinkle in his eyes. "Need help with that, Detective?"_

_Kate bit her lower lip, watching him from beneath her lashes. She leaned up, putting her mouth next to his ear. "I might need... a hand."_

[][][]

"I never told you-"

"Mmm?" Mommy and Daddy were giving their little girl a bath with her giggling and splashing around in the water.

"-that guy, Agent Jones or whatever his name was... he kissed me."

Rick whipped his head to her. "He what? When?"

Lizzy bounced around, making waves and splashing water on both her parents. "Come on, baby girl, sit still. I gotta rinse the shampoo out." Kate swiped a rogue strand of hair behind her ear and turned her attention back to her husband. "Yeah. While we were undercover."

Rick's brow furrowed. "You never told me that." He wiped the washcloth over Lizzy face, her chest and fat little stomach.

"Well, you already didn't like the guy," Kate responded with a shrug. She placed a hand over her daughter's face and tipped a cup of water over Lizzy's head. "I didn't want to give you any more reason to hate the Feds."

"Ass-"

She slapped his arm. "Castle! Not in front of our daughter. I don't want her first word to be _that_."

"He's still one," Rick grumbled. "So, how did it happen?" He inquired, wiping excess water off Lizzy's sputtering little face; his other hand holding onto her chubby arm.

"What? The kiss?" He nodded.

Kate sighed and tipped another cup of water over her baby's head, making Lizzy whimper in response. "It's okay, baby girl. Almost done... Uh, well, I can't really remember. He just sort of grabbed and kissed me. As a diversion or cover or something."

"Mm. Sure," Rick snorted.

She turned and grinned at him, blowing a strand of hair out off her cheek. "If it's any consolation, Writer Boy, I was thinking about you the whole time."

He glanced at her, face serious, but eyes twinkling in amusement. "Flattery won't get you very far, Detective."

She raised an eyebrow, shuffling over to him on her knees; damp shirt clinging to her chest, cheeks flushed from exertion and eyes sparkling.

Utterly beautiful.

"Well then, Mr. Castle," Kate started, pressing herself against him; her mouth against his ear. "How about a whole night of... cuddling with me and your daughter in bed? How does that sound?"

He turned and smiled softly at her; his wife, mother of his child. Rick caressed her cheek and kissed her once, twice, three times.

"That sounds like a plan, Mrs. Castle."

[][][]

_'Cause it's you and me and all other people_

_With nothing to do and nothing to do_

_And it's you and me and all other people_

_And I don't know why but I can't keep my eyes off of you_

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, so this was basically just some pointless Caskett fluff. Again. I wanted to try the whole flashback-thing and I will probably do it in future chapters as well, exploring their first date and wedding - stuff like that.**

**Let me know what you think. Any ideas are also welcome.**

**Title of this chapter is a Goo Goo Dolls' song, 'Hey Jealousy' and lyrics at the end is from Lifehouse's great song, 'You and me'.**

**Apologies for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: Ahoy dear readers! Thank you for the kind reviews, the story alerts and favourites - I love you for it. This chapter is a very short one, but I am working a theme; so there will be more chapters following this one. I tried to keep the mush minimal, but whatevs. Deal with it.**

**Enjoy**

**Disclaimer: I wish!**

* * *

**Chapter 36 – Love & Marriage**

"I now pronounce you husband and wife… You may kiss the bride." A grinning Javier Esposito pulled his wife closer and kissed her soundly amid loud cheering and clapping. The two newlyweds wore matching, beaming smiles when they eventually broke apart.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Esposito," the preacher announced; Lanie leaned in to brush a kiss against her husband's cheek. He took her hand and placed a kiss on her wedding band, smiling widely.

"That was beautiful," a teary-eyed Kate commented as she watched her two friends making their way back down the aisle. She caught Lanie's eye, sharing a knowing smile with the glowing bride.

"Yeah, it was," Rick replied, turning his attention from watching the newlyweds to his wife; taking her in, absorbing every detail. The hair curling softly around her face, the sharpness of her cheekbones, her mysterious, sparkling eyes, the strong lines of her jaw, the elegant profile of her nose, the graceful slope of her neck and her soft, _soft _(now smiling) mouth. He wanted to kiss her, brush his lips over that smile. To drink in her joy, consume her beauty, make love to her with a whispered caress of his lips.

So he did.

He leaned down and pressed a gentle, intimate kiss on the corner of her open and smiling mouth. He pressed another one, two kisses to the same spot before kissing her cheek delicately.

_You may kiss the bride._

"What was that for?" Kate asked softly, her eyes light and affectionate.

Rick shrugged and grinned. "Just because I can. You are my wife after all. And that means I can kiss you whenever I feel like it."

Kate rolled her eyes and smiled. "Because I just witnessed two of my best friends getting married and feeling really happy as a result, I'm letting your sappiness slide, Mr. Castle. Just this once."

"Oh, you love it when I'm sappy, Mrs. Castle. I know you do." He smiled at his wife, lacing his fingers with hers and absently rubbing his thumb over her wedding ring; memories rushing back, every detail of that day engraved in his mind.

_I now pronounce you husband and wife_.

Every detail of their wedding day.

[][][]

_His mouth was open, jaw somewhere on the floor most probably. Yeah, well, he didn't really care. She was here. __On her father's arm. Walking towards him. _In a wedding dress. _A long, flowing, elegant white, beaded gown. Her tall, lean body moving gracefully, almost gliding in the white dress; her dark hair pulled up, soft strands curling around at the base of her neck, around her face. Her eyes were locked on his, emerald and shining and captivating; windows to her soul. Her smile - his heart stuttered at the sight - was wide and untamed, her whole being radiant with it. Her joy and affection were revealed without hesitation. He would later declare it to have been a__ glimpse into her 'transcendent soul' while s__he playfully rolled her eyes at him._

_Rick could feel himself smiling, a little baffled, a little in awe. A stupid, grinning fool in love. And by the way she was beaming at him, two stupid, grinning fools in love. He had to stop himself from running to meet her. He clasped his hands together, bounced on the balls of his feet; excited and a little nervous, feeling butterflies dancing around in his chest. Finally, _finally,_ they reached him. _

_Jim turned to his daughter, her hand grasped tightly in his, and smiled at her; reminded of his own wedding day. He pressed a kiss against her cheek and whispered "I love you, Katie" into her ear. Kate smiled at her father, her throat constricting, her vision a little blurry. He squeezed her hand before letting her go, sensing the impatience of the younger man in front of him. Jim glanced at his beaming soon-to-be son in law and handed his daughter, his Katie, over to him. Rick smiled at the older man, the 'I'll take care of her' left unsaid, before his eyes migrated back to her, his soon-to-be wife. Kate smiled at him - that Mona Lisa smile - and slid her small, slender hand into his while turning her attention to the preacher._

_"Dearly beloved..."_

_He was still staring at her, slowly dragging his eyes over her; a Greek goddess, a mortal muse, his bride. His exquisite, _exquisite_ bride. The profile of her beautifully sculptured face, her long, elegant neck, her sinuous shoulders, the hard lines of her collarbone, the smooth path to her chest and into the valley between her-_

_The preacher cleared his throat and Rick snapped his head up to meet the older man's mirth-filled eyes while the audience laughed quietly. He mumbled an apology and gave Kate an adorable, goofy smile. She rolled her eyes fondly and felt her lips twitch, her hand squeezing his bicep and her shoulder brushing his arm._

_The rest of it was a blur, a little hazy. He barely heard the sermon, she barely registered the vows; both nervous, excited, stupidly grinning wrecks by the time the rings were exchanged. They just wanted to hear-_

_"By the power vested in me by the state of New York... I now pronounce you husband and wife," the preacher finally (finally!) announced to the impatient couple. "You may kiss the bride."_

_Rick wasted no time in doing so, tugging his wife (wife!) closer and kissing her. Thoroughly. Slowly. Deliciously. Kate broke away, smiling, amid the loud cheering from their friends and family and buried her slightly flushed face in her husband's (husband's!) neck. He chuckled and rubbed a hand down her smooth, sun-kissed back._

_She pulled back, unable to stop smiling. "Hi there, Mr. Castle," Kate said quietly, a hand trailing up and down his chest._

_He grinned at her before brushing a sweet kiss against her lips. "Hi there, Mrs. Castle."_

[][][]

_Love and marriage, love and marriage_

_Go together like a horse and carriage_

_This I tell ya, brother, you can't have one without the other_

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, I know it's short, but I'm going to write another two chapters dealing with this theme, intermixing the Esplanie nuptials with flashbacks from the Caskett one. The next chapter will be longer, I promise.**

**Lemme know what you think.**

**Apologies for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**

**Title of the chapter and lyrics at the end is, obviously, from Frank Sinatra's song, "Love and Marriage".**


	37. Chapter 37

**A/N: Thanks for all the generous reviews, despite the shortness of the last chapter. This one is much longer and more eventful; I've included a flashback from Ryan's wedding as well. Anyway, there is probably one more chapter left in this theme. **

**(_Italics_ - flashbacks)**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: ...**

**(Updated version - I made a few corrections)**

* * *

**Chapter 37 – I've got you **

"Oh man, look at him go!" Kevin Ryan exclaimed, laughing as he watched his partner dance it out with his wife. "Gmmf... he's not too bad."

"Yeah, it doesn't look like he's stepping on her toes. Unlike other people I know," Jenny commented with a wry smile, poking her husband in the ribs.

"Hey, I wasn't _that_ bad!" Ryan responded in indignation.

"Oh come on, Ryan, you almost fell flat on your face at your wedding. We were there, remember?" Kate said, grinning before taking a sip of her drink.

"Well, in his defense, by the time he lost his river dancin' shoes, he was kinda out of it. And by out of it, I do mean plastered," Rick commented, draping his arm around the back of his wife's chair.

"Thank you," Ryan responded with a nod of his head and a smile. "But I do also recall that it was you and Javier's fault that I got plastered."

"What?" Jenny asked surprised, looking between her husband and Rick, who was wearing a sheepish smile. Kate only shook her head and folded her arms, wearing a _'Why I am not surprised'_-expression. Her husband was such a little boy sometimes.

Well, only sometimes…

"It's true, Sweetie. They spiked my drinks. That's why I was a little out of it."

"And also passed out before we could _enjoy_ our wedding night," Jenny hit back dryly, Kevin's eyes growing wide and his face flushing.

"Whoa. Sorry man. It wasn't our intention to spoil the party," Rick said, struggling to stop from laughing. "And my apologies to you too, Mrs. Ryan."

Jenny smiled and linked her arm with her husband's. "Apology accepted."

Kate turned to her husband, lifting an eyebrow, her lips quirking in amusement. "Are you guys _ever_ going to grow up?"

Both men said in unison: "No."

The two women just rolled their eyes and shared a smile. A squealing laugh on the dance floor grabbed the small group's attention. Mr. Esposito was currently spinning Mrs. Esposito around, both laughing. He finally put her down, still grinning even as she playfully slapped his arm. The small audience watched as Javier said something to his wife before thoroughly kissing her; Lanie winding her arms around her husband's neck. Both of them completely engrossed and happily unaware of the setting of their impromptu make-out session.

Of course, their friends would not let them live it down.

Rick cupped both hands around his mouth and yelled: "Hey, get a room!" while Ryan let out a piercing whistle. The two newlyweds broke away, startled, eyes darting around to search out the culprits. When Esposito spotted them he shook his head with a grin while Lanie glared at them playfully and a little amused. The two Espositos went back to making out on the dance floor like two horny teenagers.

Not long before they rush off to their hotel room...

"Well, not much has changed, has it?" Ryan said with a grin, wrapping an arm around his wife's shoulders.

Jenny frowned at him. "What do you mean?"

"Remember how they were all over each other at our wedding?"

The petite blonde returned a grin. "Oh yeah. How could I forget?" She sent a teasing gaze towards the other couple. "But they weren't the only interesting _event_ of the night as I recall."

Rick sat back and grinned while Kate ducked her head and smiled, her hand falling to her husband's leg.

That was a _very_ good night.

Rick covered her hand, weaving his fingers with hers. "Ah, yes, good times."

[][][]

_"Well, I guess that means that Esplanie is back on."_

_Kate chuckled and shook her head. She wasn't surprised. "Yeah, I guess so." She glanced at her partner. Currently her dancing partner. "Castle?"_

_"Mmm?" He was still staring at Lanie and Esposito who were busy making out a few feet away from them on the dance floor. _

_Truth be told, he was a little jealous._

_"Can we get back to dancing?" She grinned at him, an eyebrow raised._

_His eyes snapped back to hers. "Uh, yeah." He gave her a crooked smile and started moving again._

_They danced quietly for a few moments before he spoke again._

_"So, Detective Beckett, does this count as a date?" His tone was teasing, but he was kinda praying that it did count as one. They made a deal after Rome - five dates before sleeping together again. Of course, during their week in Rome they resembled a couple on honeymoon. _

_He happily agreed to it, thinking that five proper dates could be done in two weeks. Tops._

_Alas, murder and the real world got in the way. The deal had dragged on for a month and a week already. I__t was killing him. Well, them both actually, but Kate was better at hiding it._

_Kate smirked. "Yes." He smiled widely. "But not as an official one." His smile fell._

_Damn._

_"What? Oh come on," Rick whined, his shoulders sagging in disappointment. Kate wanted to burst out laughing. _

_He was just so easy._

_"You know our deal, Castle. Five dates. Proper ones, with dinner and a show. Only after the fifth one do-"_

_They were on four now._

_"-I get to see you naked again," he mumbled morosely, staring daggers into Esposito's back while he practically ravished Lanie right in front of them._

_Lucky bastard. _

_A feral, predatory smile bloomed over her features. She leaned up and breathed into his ear: "Oh, but Writer Boy, when that time comes, it will be worth it. Believe me."_

_He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw; memories - naked memories - of Rome swirling around in his mind. Not fantasies or dreams, but memories. And he was holding that woman who made that memories with him right now. He remembered how soft her skin had felt to his mouth, the suppleness of her breasts, how she tasted and smelled, how the sharp bones of her hips felt under his hands, the arch of her body, the sexy, throaty moans she emitted when she-_

_Lord have mercy._

_When he eventually opened his eyes again, he caught sight of Ryan and Jenny dancing closely and being all lovely dovey. It was their wedding night, so obviously Ryan was going to get-_

_Lucky bastard._

_Oh, it was tragic. He felt like the only kid who _didn't_ get a present on Christmas. _

_"Oh cheer up, Writer Boy-"_

_"Writer Man," he corrected automatically, still a little deflated._

_"-we're here now. Together. And happy," Kate said with a small smile, looking up at him. Her eyes revealed everything; all of her secrets, all of the things unsaid. He saw it - clear as day._

_She loved him. Kate Beckett _loved_ him._

_His heart twisted at the knowledge. "I love you," he breathed, not able to stop the words, the truth from tumbling out of his mouth. He tenderly cupped her cheek and she placed her smaller hand on his larger one. She smiled again, full and blooming - the sun rising in the East._

___(I carry your heart)_

_"I love you too, Rick." _

_(I carry it in my heart)_

_He cracked the largest, most adorable smile and kissed her. Softly, delicately, beautifully. When they broke apart, she grinned and let her forehead fall to his collarbone, placing an open-mouthed kiss against the skin of his neck. He smiled and planted one, two kisses in her hair; content and relaxed. But when she started to lightly suck and nip at his skin, blood started to rush south._

_"Kate," he said tightly. _

_"Yeah?" She breathed, deviously darting her tongue out against his skin. He groaned and gripped her waist. _

_"Uh- uh... you, you gotta stop t-that." She was kissing and nipping at his jaw, one of her hands spread out against his chest, feeling the pounding of his heart._

_"Why, Castle?" Kate purred into his ear, her bedroom voice the personification of sex. _

_She was killing him._

_His hips jerked involuntarily when she started to suck on his earlobe. "Because, Detective, I'm going to lose it right here on this dance floor with Father O'Brien and Nanna O'Malley watching on," he all but hissed, gritting his teeth against the sudden, pulsing arousal._

_She laughed, low and throaty. "Well then, Writer-" She glanced down pointedly. "-Man, let's take this party somewhere more private."_

_He gaped at her. "But w-what about f-five dates?"_

_She grinned again and started to back away from him. "Oh Castle, you are just too easy." He was watching her, dumb-founded. She took his hand and started to lead him off the dance floor, teasing him with the swing of her hips._

_He wanted to do an air punch and shout score! but didn't. He was too busy watching her ass and grinning like an idiot._

_Lucky bastard._

[][][]

"I will never, _ever_ forget that linen closet," Rick said with a large smile, twirling his wife around and drawing her back into him.

She laughed and wound her arm around his shoulders, her slender hand splayed across his neck. "Yeah, because it was _sooo_ romantic."

He grinned. "Babe, I didn't need romance with all your teasing." He paused for a moment, his crooked smile growing. "And apparently neither did you. As I remember, you practically jumped me when we got in that closet."

She smiled, slowly and widely, recalling the linen closet-incident.

So hot.

"Yeah, well I just couldn't help myself_._" She leaned up and brushed a kiss against his still-smiling mouth. Before she could retreat, he pulled her back and captured her mouth in a hungry, consuming kiss.

Kate was breathless, a little weak in the knees after that kiss and even more so when her husband started to nip at the soft skin of her neck.

If there was a linen closet nearby...

"Honey, they're playing our song," he said suddenly, his mouth against her ear.

She smiled, pressing her forehead against his cheek; the velvety, crooning voice of Frank Sinatra wrapping around them like a spell. She looked up at him, lifting an eyebrow. "May I have this dance, Mr. Castle?"

They technically never stopped dancing, but she was asking with those eyes, that mouth, that voice, that heart. He smiled at her, his wife, and traced a thumb along her jaw and over her soft,_ soft_ lips.

"I thought you'd never ask, Mrs. Castle."

Rick drew her closer, his arm tight and possessive around her waist while Kate wrapped an arm around his neck and pressed her cheek against his cheek, secure in his warmth.

Happy and in love.

_For richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, 'till death do us part._

They moved to the music, familiar to the steps and the rhythm and the lyrics. It was home, they were home.

Kate pressed a kiss against her husband's cheek. "Do you remember our first dance as a married couple?"

[][][]

_"Ladies and gentlemen, the happy couple will now have their first dance as Mr. and Mrs. Richard Castle."_

_Rick smiled and stood up, holding out his hand. "Mrs. Castle, may I have this dance?"_

_Kate returned a smile and took her husband's hand. "You may, Mr. Castle."_

_He led his wife to the dance floor, reveling in the feel of the cool wedding band on her ring finger. __Rick and Kate Castle - f__riends, partners, lovers._

_____Husband and wife._

_Wow._

_____They were friggin' married. Married!_

_____Her head spun a little, a smile permanently stuck on her mouth. Kate was struggling to absorb it all - Rick Castle was her husband, her one and done. She felt giddy and giggly and girly. And completely, stupidly, head-over-heels in love with the man-child currently drawing her closer for their first dance. _

_____He was beautiful. Especially when he was looking at her like that, his blue eyes gentle and adoring._

_"No one says it as well as Ol' Blue Eyes," Rick said softly, slowly guiding his wife along to the music. _

_Kate smiled, wrapping her arm around his shoulders. "Weelllll... I know this writer who's also pretty good with words," she said quietly, like sharing a secret._

_He grinned, pressing a kiss against her temple. "Like I love you, Mrs. Castle?"_

_"Yeah, exactly like that." She smiled and kissed him tenderly, her hand cradling his jaw. "I love you too."_

_They swayed to the music, lost in their little bubble, their little world. That place where it was only them, candlelight and Frankie Sinatra's voice._

_Kate leaned up and whispered the lyrics into her husband's ear. "I tried so not to give in. I said to myself this affair ain't gonna go so well-"_

_He grinned and took over, pressing a kiss against her temple still swaying to the music, her small hand warm in his, her lean body molded perfectly into his larger frame._

_"-But why should I try to resist when, baby, I know so well... I've got you under my skin."_

_Always._

[][][]

"Because I've got you under my skin." He cupped her cheek. "And I love you under my skin," Rick whispered, nudging his nose with hers and placing a feathery kiss against her mouth. The song ended, but they were still swaying.

It was their song, creating a world, a place with only them in it.

_(I am never without it)_

Kate covered his large hand on her cheek with her smaller one. "I love you." She rested her mouth against his jaw and brushed her lips over his skin, delicate and tender.

_(Anywhere I go my dear and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)_

He kissed her again and again and again. "I love you to infinity and beyond."

_[][][]_

_I've got you under my skin_

_I've got you deep in the heart of me_

_So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me_

_I've got you under my skin_

* * *

**A/N: Gotta say, I really enjoyed writing this one. It started out light and funny and ended up being all romantic. I guess that is what happens when listening to Frank Sinatra's velvety voice. Can't you just see them dancing to this in front of a fireplace, a bottle of wine standing somewhere nearby? *Sigh***

**Anyway.**

**Lemme know what you think.**

**Title and lyrics at the end is from the gorgeous, gorgeous Cole Porter-written song, "I've got you under my skin." They just don't make music like this anymore. For those with a good eye would also have spotted references to E. E. Cummins' lovely poem, "I carry your heart."**


	38. Chapter 38

**A/N: I sincerely apologize for the delay. Who knew three weeks could go by so quickly? But good things come to those who wait, right? Anyway, this is the last chapter in this wedding theme. A little humour, a little sexiness and a good dose of fluff.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: the wonderful Andrew Marlowe is the genius and creator and keeper of these characters. I'm only borrowing them.**

**Happy Thanksgiving to everyone celebrating it!**

* * *

**Chapter 38 - Your Love is My Turning Page**

"Well, we will probably be there in thirty or forty minutes…" Rick grinned upon hearing his mother's animated gushing about how adorable her granddaughter was. "Is she asleep?" He laughed lightly at his mother relieved answer. The flamboyant Martha Rodgers trying to get a baby to sleep? That should be interesting to witness. She probably sang show tunes. "Yes, well, that ought to put her out…" Show tunes it was then. He paused to listen to her question, leaning against the bar and spotting his wife on the dance floor with an awkward-looking teenage boy.

Ah, another fan. Go figure.

"No, she's dancing with a young admirer right now who's completely in awe of course," Rick answered with a soft smile, watching his wife dance with one of Esposito's nephews. A fourteen year-old boy who's been in love with Kate ever since she first smiled at him when he was about six years old and visiting Uncle Javi at the precinct. Judging by the dreamy expression on the boy's face and the fact that Kate had to make sure that his hands did not stray from her waist, the teenager was clearly still smitten.

Who could blame him?

Especially when she was smiling at him like that. Like he was the only person in the world. Yeah, it was official: Ruben Esposito was ruined for all other women.

His mother's inquiry about the wedding dragged him out of his thoughts. "Beautiful, it was really beautiful… Esposito teared up a bit during his speech. And there was nearly a cat-fight about the bouquet which was quite entertaining." He caught sight of Kate again who was still busy charming the lovesick teenager.

Rick paused to listen to his mother and laughed, shaking his head. "No, Mother, there was no repeat performance. That was a once in a lifetime event."

Elvis was definitely not in this building...

[][][]

_He had been planning this for a long time and of course Ryan and Esposito were obligated to assist him on this mission. They lost a bet, after all. His bride would either be amused and charmed or annoyed and embarrassed. _

_He was going with amused and charmed. He was her amusing, charming and ruggedly handsome husband after all._

_And it was their wedding day. _

_"Okay guys, Pete has everything set up. You ready?" He could barely contain his excitement, bouncing on his toes. _

_The other two looked completely miserable. And a little pissed off. But whatever, he didn't care. It was his wedding day and they lost a bet._

_That would teach them not to challenge the king of Madden. _

_"Castle, do we really have to do this?" Ryan whined, frowning furiously._

_Esposito nodded, his face grim. "Yeah, Bro. C'mon, can't we settle this bet any other-"_

_Rick grinned. "No. A win is a win, Espo. Ryan, turn that frown upside down. And smile gentlemen, we're almost up."_

_Ryan glared at him, wishing he had his gun with him. "I hate you, man. You're gonna pay for this."_

_The frown on Esposito's face got deeper, cursing in Spanish as he led Ryan away. _

_Like lambs to the slaughter. _

_Rick grinned and went back to the wedding table. Back to his wife. He stood there and (creepily) watched her for a moment. Kate Castle was beautiful in the soft, romantic glow of the fairy lights, completely unaware of how captivating she really was. And tomorrow he would be waking up next to her for the rest of his life, this ethereal creature, his mortal muse. _

_A mystery he had a lifetime to solve. _

_He wanted to kiss the soft skin of her exposed back, the ridges of her spine, the hard edges of her shoulder blades. He wanted to so badly. Only a little while before he could undress her with whispered words, caress her with gently spoken pledges and make her come undone with breathless sighs. But for now he'd settle on telling her the truth. And the truth was that-_

_"You're beautiful," Rick whispered into her ear before kissing her cheek. _

_Kate laughed lightly, sounding like a ray of light, tilting her head back to look at him. Her husband. "You're not so bad yourself," she replied softly, leaning in to kiss him. "So, Mr. Castle, when are we going to get out of here?" She murmured close to his lips, her dark eyes full of carnal promises._

_Rick smiled. "Why, Mrs. Castle? So you can have your wicked way with me?"_

_Her lips curled into a sly, sexy grin. "Something like that, yeah." _

_A mouth like that had to be kissed over and over and over again. To infinity and beyond._

_He wrapped a large hand around the back of her neck and crashed his mouth onto hers, stealing her breath. He grinned against her mouth before breaking away completely to look at her dazed expression. "We'll be getting out of here soon enough. I just have a surprise for you before we go."_

_Kate sobered and eyed him skeptically. "A surprise? Rick, you know I don't like surprises."_

_He shrugged and grinned like a little boy. "Yeah, but you're gonna like this one. I promise, Babe."_

_She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Stop calling me that... Castle, this better be a good surprise. Or I swear I'm gonna-"_

_Rick silenced her with another quick kiss before getting up. "You'll love it. I promise."_

_Everybody loved Elvis._

[][][]

"May I cut in?"

Ruben Esposito glanced at Kate and then back at Rick. He shrugged, his shoulders sagging slightly. "Sure." The fourteen year-old let go of her hand rather reluctantly. "Thank you, Detective-"

"-Kate. We've been over this now. It's Kate." She smiled brightly at him before leaning in to kiss his cheek. The boy froze, his knees feeling suspiciously weak. "Thank you for dancing with me, Mr. Esposito." The brunette beauty winked at him before taking her husband's hand. Ruben only nodded dumbly, feeling a little dazed as he placed a hand to his kissed cheek. Slowly a wide smile spread across his face.

Someday he was gonna marry a girl like that.

Rick grinned as he pulled his wife closer. "You just made his year."

Kate laughed softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. "He's a good kid. I like him."

"Yeah well, he more than likes you. Look at him." He nodded towards the teenager still staring dreamily at Kate. "Poor kid. He's completely in love with you and I don't blame him. I mean look at you. How could he_ not_ be?"

Ah, a writer and his words.

She rolled her eyes and shook her head, flushing slightly. "Did you call your mother?"

His lips quirked. She always changed the subject when the focus was on her. "Yeah, everything is under control. Lizzy is asleep even though it was a bit of a struggle according to my mother."

Kate's brow furrowed briefly. "Well, she's always a little restless when we're not there." They swayed quietly for a few a moments, her head nestled in the hollow of his neck. "Should we get going?"

He kissed the side of her head. "Almost. Just... another few minutes, okay?" He murmured into her dark hair, not willing to break the gentle swaying just yet.

"Don't tell me you have to participate in a surprise for Lanie," she said, her lips twitching.

Rick chuckled lightly. "No, thank the gods for that. I wasn't stupid enough to make any bets with the groom."

She allowed the grin to blossom fully. "I still can't believe you did that."

"What?"

"That surprise. At our wedding."

"Oh right, how could I forget?" He chuckled. "I still can't believe I got Ryan and Esposito to participate... You liked it, though. I could tell from the huge grin on you face that you loved it."

She shrugged, her head on his shoulder. "Mmm, it was... _sweet_. In a completely embarrassing way."

"Lucky for me that you love Elvis."

"And you," she muttered without missing a beat.

He grinned. "And me."

[][][]

_What the-_

_Kate burst out laughing, immediately clamping a hand over her mouth. She was completely taken aback and utterly amused. Along with the rest of the crowd of friends and family._

_In the center of the dance floor stood three very different and comical-looking Elvises. Rick being the main one of course, smiling like the idiot that he was. The other two just looked utterly miserable and uncomfortable in their Elvis outfits, complete with the wigs and sunglasses. The crowd of friends and family were whistling and clapping their hands like crazy. Kate could hear Lanie laugh somewhere in the cacophony of sounds. She saw Alexis grinning and shaking her head in amusement. Her father clapped and laughed while Martha just shook her head, trying, but failing, to suppress the upward quirk of her lips._

_Kate just stared at them in disbelief, thoroughly amused._

_"Well, thank you... thank you very much," Rick said to the cheering audience in his best Elvis impersonation. He turned to look at Kate, grinning widely. "I would like to dedicate this to my beautiful wife. I love you, Honey."_

_She flushed bright red, but failed to keep the huge smile off her face. It was embarrassing, but sweet... in a Castle sort of way._

_Life with this man was never going to be boring, was it?_

_"Well bless my soul. What's wrong with me?" He was singing it. He was singing this song to her. And dancing for her. Mmm, he was a pretty good dancer. All kinds of hot when thrusting like that..._

_What a ridiculous, adorable, infuriating, sexy man. _

_The other two nuts were dancing in the background and also provided back-up vocals. Who would have thought? Detective Javier Esposito and Detective Kevin Ryan singing and dancing in the background dressed in ridiculous Elvis-outfits._

_Yeah, somebody definitely lost a bet._

_"My hands are shaky and my knees are weak. I can't seem to stand on my own two feet." The audience was going absolutely wild. Yep, Rick Castle sure knew how to work a crowd. "Who do you thank when you have such luck?" He approached the wedding table, eyes on Kate. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb were flanking him. "I'm in love... I'm all shook up. Mm mmm, ooh huh, yeah, yeah." He held out his hand to her, but Kate refused to take it, staring him down with mirth-filled eyes. _

_Martha was nudging her and laughing, her father was only smiling in amusement and nodded in encouragement._

_"Come on, Kate!" Alexis yelled over the noise._

_"When I'm near that girl I love best. My heart beats so it scares me to death!"_

_"Yeah, come on! Don't leave him hangin' girl!" Lanie piped up. _

_"My tongue gets tied when I try to speak. My insides shake like a leaf on a tree."_

_Someone let out a piercing whistle when Rick imitated shaking 'like a leaf on a tree'. His wife only shook her head and bit her lower lip to try and suppress the wide smile that was fighting to escape._

_"There's only one cure for this body of mine. That's to have the girl I love so fine." Not waiting a moment longer, Rick snagged her hand and pulled her up. _

_He led her to the dance floor and let her stand right in the middle. "She touched my hand, what a chill I got." He mimicked shivering. Right up against her. Ridiculous man. _

_Ridiculously sexy man. _

_"Her lips are like a volcano that's hot." He traced her jaw as he sang the lyrics, his thumb touching her lower lip for a moment. "I'm proud to say you're my buttercup." He beamed at her, eyes sparkling. "I'm in love... I'm all shook up."_

_Before he could finish his performance, Kate had her arms wrapped around him and kissing him amid loud cheering, cat-calls and clapping._

_She was smiling when they broke apart. "You are ridiculous, Rick Castle," she said on a laugh, toying with his wig. _

_He grinned and removed his sunglasses. "And you are absolutely gorgeous, Kate Castle." Rick kissed her again, once, twice. "Come on, let's get out of here."_

_Her lips quirked. "Elvis... is leaving the building."_

[][][]

"Ugh, my feet are killing me," Kate whined, kicking off her shoes.

Rick grinned, hanging up their coats. "Well you always say that beauty is pain, Babe." He stepped in behind her, wrapping his arms around her. They stood in silence for a while. "Hey, how about a glass of wine," he murmured, sweeping the hair away from her shoulders and exposing her neck. "And a nice, warm bubble bath? With me joining you of course." He placed a few kisses on her exposed skin, opening his mouth to taste her.

"Mmm, sounds nice," Kate hummed, her eyes fluttering closed. She quickly sobered and stepped away from his embrace. "But first I want to say goodnight to our baby girl." She took his hand and started leading him towards the stairs. "Come on, Daddy."

They stood silently side-by-side watching their daughter's sleeping form. Watching how her small chest rose and fell with every quiet breath, how the soft, dark curly hair flopped over her forehead, how her small, open mouth rounded to form an O, how her fat little cheeks were coloured pink.

Kate brushed a hand over her daughter's skull and leaned down to kiss her head, making Lizzy stir for a moment. Her mother whispered a soft goodnight and kissed her again on each cheek. Rick stepped closer, trailing a finger over his little girl's face, not willing to accept the fact that was she was already turning one year closer to 18. He sighed and bent down to place a kiss in her hair, her temple and finally her forehead.

"Goodnight, Sweet Pea."

Kate led him out the room and as soon as she closed the door, he was crowding her against it, his arms on either side of her head and trapping her with his body.

"So..."

She grinned, her hands on his hips. "So?"

"You still up for that bubble bath?" He hummed, his mouth next to her ear, his stubbly cheek against hers.

"Yeah, definitely," she said softly, her voice dark and rich. "You up for it, Mr. Castle?"

A slow, sly smile curved his lips. "Oh, you have no idea, Mrs. Castle."

[][][]

_Sunlight painted the room in day, bright and warm. Rick woke slowly, his eyes opening and closing as he became aware of his surroundings. He heard water running, coming to the conclusion that she was in there. He turned to lie on his back, throwing an arm over his face. He felt tired and sated and happy, getting used to feeling the wedding band on his left-hand ring finger. He drifted off again before feeling the bed dip with his lover. His partner. His wife._

_Suddenly Kate was straddling him, only wearing a robe and a smile. Rick removed his arm to look at her, smiling at him like that. Like he was the only being in existence, the only person in her world, the keeper of heart._

_"Kiss me, Kate," Rick said with a grin, his hands gripping her waist and tugging her down towards him._

_She laughed, going willingly towards him. "Morning, husband," she greeted before kissing him sweetly, softly like dew on a flower._

_"Morning, wife."_

_She rolled her eyes, still grinning. "We are disgustingly cute, aren't we?"_

_He shrugged, rubbing his hands up and down her sides. "So? We've been married for like twelve hours-" He grinned at her, suddenly feeling drunk with happiness. "-Mrs. Castle."_

_She returned a wide, beaming smile. "Mmm, Mrs. Castle. I like that. A lot."_

_"Me too."_

_"Mr. and Mrs. Castle. Wow. __For the rest of our lives, huh?"_

_A writer and his muse. Friends, lovers, partners._

_Husband and wife._

_He slowly undid the tie of her robe. "Until eternity began and forever ended."_

_[][][]_

_Your love is my turning page_

_Where only the sweetest words remain_

_Every kiss a cursive line_

_Every touch is a redefining phrase_

* * *

**A/N: I really enjoyed writing this little theme. Even if it was disgustingly cute... These two are just so much fun to write! I still have a lot planned for this story, so don't worry I'm not nearly finished. I just take a long time to get writing. And there will definitely be more of Lizzy in the future chapters, I promise.**

**So once again, please review and tell me what you think.**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistake.**

**Title of this chapter and lyrics at the end is from Sleep at last's breathtaking song "Turning page". Do yourself a favour and listen to it; it's gorgeous. **


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: Ahoy, dear readers! I apologize for the delay in updating; I've been working on my other fic, 'An Odyssey to Us'. Go read that if you're interested in angst, a lot of angst. #Shameless self-promotion.**

**Anywho, this chapter is about Kate going back to work and like many of the other chapters, this will also be a little theme I will cover in two or three chapters. Now, I know that she's had a crazy-long period of maternity leave, but let's just pretend that it's normal and get on with it, 'kay?**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Only Lizzy is mine. And any future offspring I decide to create from the loins of these two. **

**(_Italics_ - flashbacks)**

* * *

**Chapter 39 – Mama Bear**

"Babe."

She groaned and turned over, pulling a pillow over her head. "Just five minutes more," Kate mumbled sleepily.

Rick laughed lightly before removing the pillow over her head. "That's what you said five minutes ago." He kissed her. "Now I would love it if you could stay in bed-" he planted a kiss on her jaw while pinning her arms above her head. "-and continue this line of investigation-" She barked out a laugh, a little throaty and breathless. He had the ability to turn her into a horny teenager with a flick of his tongue and a touch of his lips.

A _very _horny one.

"-because, believe me, there is nothing more rewarding in the morning than you, naked…and moaning…and all kinds of sexy," he said, punctuating every phrase with a lingering kiss. "-underneath or on top of me-" he wiggled his eyebrows. He kissed her again and then was suddenly gone. "But… today is your first day back and you need to get up _now _so that I have time to feed you before you go chasing down criminals in those ridiculous shoes of-"

Before he could finish, Kate sat up and roughly pulled him towards her, their mouths clashing, her hands traveling. He gasped when she moved a hand down to the waistband of his boxers, easily slipping inside. But before he could enjoy it, she was up and away, leaving her husband breathless and panting and wanting more, _so _much more.

"That was firstly, for being a tease and secondly, for disrespecting my shoes," Kate said with a satisfied smirk, feeling victorious at the dumbfounded and highly aroused expression on her sexy hubby's face. She stood at the bathroom door and pulled off her shirt, just to torture him some more. He deserved it. "And nobody disrespects my shoes, Castle." She threw her shirt right into his slack-jawed face. "You of all people should know that." With that, she disappeared into the bathroom, locking the door. Her grin widened when she heard his loud groan on the other side. Yeah, she would have enjoyed conserving water with him. So, _so_ much.

But, unfortunately, there was no time for early-morning hanky-panky now.

She was going back to work today.

And leaving her baby girl behind.

[][][]

_"Barney is a dinosaur from our imagination..."_

Little Lizzy, still sleepy and in her jammies, was sitting on the carpet while watching the purple dinosaur dance around, clutching Snuggles close to her chest and sucking on her pacifier. Usually at 6h30, she was still asleep, but when she heard the commotion downstairs she was wide awake. Small little ears and the things they hear.

Something was definitely going on - she just knew it.

"Hey, Rick, have you seen my keys?"

At the sound of her mother's voice, Lizzy squealed and kicked her little legs before turning around crawling over to Kate on all fours, leaving Snuggles behind.

Mommy trumped Snuggles every time.

"Uh, no. Sorry, Babe."

The little girl made it to her mother and immediately grabbed onto one of Kate's grey dress pant-clad legs, dragging herself into a standing position. Over the last couple of weeks or so, she had started standing on her own and giving small steps, getting closer and closer to actually walking.

Her parents were beyond proud.

"Oh, hi baby girl," Kate said with a beaming smile, bending down and scooping her daughter up. "What are you doing up, Cupcake?" Lizzy answered by tiredly rubbing her eyes and then dropping her head against her mother's collarbone, snuggling closer, a small baby hand instinctively starting to fiddle with a strand of Kate's hair. She always did that when she was sleepy.

Oh, sweet baby girl.

Her heart kinda melted as she watched her daughter, dark hair and delicate face, struggling to keep her eyes open as she clung to her mother. When she looked up, her husband was watching them with a soft, goofy smile, his hair flopping over his forehead, a dry towel draped over his shoulder. One damn fine daddy.

Mmmm. He was simply scrumptious in only his boxers and navy blue NYPD t-shirt.

Yum.

"Was she awake when you came down?" Kate asked, settling onto a chair with her baby girl still clinging to her.

"I think so. I heard her whine on the baby monitor," Rick answered, sliding a cup of coffee in front of her, leaning across the counter to peck her on the cheek. She smiled at him while adjusting Lizzy in her arms, still cradling the little girl against her chest.

"She must still be tired," Kate murmured, tracing a finger over her baby's cheek and cupping her skull tenderly.

"You want me to take her back to bed while you eat?"

Kate continued to watch her daughter, taking in every detail. "Uh, no. I just want... to hold her for few more minutes. Before I have to go," she answered softly, her focus still on her baby girl.

He nodded, understanding all too well. "Sure." He paused for a moment, drinking in the sight of his wife being a mother to his child. His chest always felt tight when he saw her like this; tender and soft and motherly. He loves bad-ass Beckett, being all hot in her high heels and with a gun, but he loves her the most when she loves his kids, his daughters.

When she's being a mother.

And she's a good one. A beautiful one. A complete natural.

[][][]

_A week ago..._

_"Hey Lex," Kate answered with a grin, holding on to a squirming and shrieking Lizzy. She and Mommy were playing on the ground when her big sister called._

_There was a moment of silence and then sniffling. The smile immediately dropped from Kate's face. "Lex?"_

_"Hi," the younger woman answered quietly, morosely. _

_Uh-oh. That sounded a hellavu lot like heartbreak. _

_Kate sighed and put her busy-body almost-one-year-old on the ground, immediately letting the little rascal scamper off to the study where her father was busy writing._

_She wanted someone to play with. And Daddy was the best to climb on top of._

_"Honey, what's wrong?" Kate asked, sitting down and getting comfortable. This was going to be one of those conversations, she feared._

_Alexis sniffled again. "Just... everything," she said, tears in her voice. There was a beat. "Craig said that we had to take a break. But of course it means that it's over, right?"_

_Oh._

_"Oh, Alexis," Kate breathed, feeling her chest constricting painfully. Alexis and Craig have been dating for the last ten months and he seemed to be the perfect guy for her. Kate liked him, even though Rick had his doubts. Alexis was his little girl, so no guy would ever really be good enough. But Craig was a good guy - smart, handsome, sweet. And it seemed that they worked._

_Guess not._

_The tears were flowing freely now. "But, I don't know, Kate. I think there may be someone else."_

_What now?_

_Kate immediately sat up, feeling anger swiftly rising because anyone who harmed Alexis Castle would endure the wrath of Detective Kate Beckett-Castle._

_Or Mama Bear as she was affectionately dubbed by her husband._

_"Why do you say that, Lex?" Calm down, look at the evidence, maybe there has been a mistake-_

_"There's this girl who's also doing a Masters in Sociology who he has been hanging out with a lot lately," the young woman answered. "They've gone for coffee a few times. And they talk constantly. Messaging each other or e-mailing or calling each other. We actually fought about it a few times."_

_Oh, hell no. _

_Kate sighed and pulled her legs up onto the couch, getting comfortable and feeling the urge to eat a whole carton of Ben and Jerry's. "Honey, I'm so sorry."_

_Alexis was crying again. "I... was really in love with him, you know? I... I thought that maybe he could be, you know, the one." Oh man. "I feel so stupid, Kate," Alexis sobbed._

_Sonofabitch. _

_"Alexis," Kate said, her voice tender, but firm. "Honey, listen to me. You're young... and beautiful... and crazy smart. And if Craig doesn't know that or doesn't appreciate that... then, well, it's his loss, believe me. I know it hurts, Sweetie, but it will get better, okay? I promise you that at least. Not right away. But it will."_

_"It just doesn't feel like it will. This is even worse than Ashley."_

_"I know, I know." There was a moment of silence. "You want me and your dad and Lizzy to come over, do something fun? Like laugh at your dad on ice skates. I swear there is nothing more ridiculous than that man trying to walk on ice. He has the grace of an elephant."_

_That got a watery laugh out of Alexis, making Kate smile. "Uh, no. Thanks for the offer, though. I feel better now after I've talked with you. I always do... Thanks Kate," she said. "I love you."_

_Kate's breath hitched, her throat burning and her eyes feeling suspiciously moist. "Love you too, Lex. So, so much," she replied softly, not caring that her voice cracked. "And hey, if you need me to come over there with my gun and scare-"_

_Alexis laughed again and the painful pressure on Kate's heart lifted even more. "No thanks. Dad is bad enough... and he's not even the one with the gun."_

_"Well, I could always let Ryan and Esposito drive out there and take Craig in for questioning."_

_Asshole._

_"I'll keep that in mind," Alexis answered softly, her voice lighter and little brighter._

_Kate swallowed again. "I'm always here, you know that right?"_

_"Yeah, I know... Look, I have to go meet some people-"_

_"-For post-break-up-therapy?" Kate questioned knowingly, her lips quirking._

_Alexis grinned, her tears dried up. "Yeah, something like that. Good thing I'm over twenty-one."_

_Kate laughed lightly. Ah, varsity. Good times. "Be careful, okay? And Lex?_

_"Yeah?"_

_"We love you."_

_"I know. Love you too, Mom... Bye."_

_"Bye," Kate greeted, slightly startled._

_Holy-_

_Mom? Oh wow._

_She was still staring at the phone when a small head of curly dark hair popped up just above the couch, a little smiling face looking up at her with twinkling blue eyes. _

_So much like Daddy._

_Kate smiled and lifted her daughter into her arms. "Hey there, Cupcake." She spotted her husband leaning, arms folded, against the door frame. He was wearing that tender expression whenever he was watching her being motherly. _

_Her brow furrowed. "What?"_

_He pushed off the door frame and walked towards them. "Nothing." He sat down beside her, immediately pulling his wife against him with Lizzy in between them. He rubbed a hand down her arm, his eyes on their daughter who was snuggled against her mother's chest. "Just... that with Alexis. What you did... was just...," he trailed off, his throat constricting as he combed his hand through her hair. _

_Her frown deepened. "What?" _

_He looked at her, eyes brilliant and blue and adoring. "You are an amazing mother, Kate, and my daughters are the luckiest girls to have you." He kissed her, thankful and sweet and just because he couldn't stop himself any longer. He pulled back, his hand still at her cheek, rubbing a thumb over her cheekbone. After a few moments, he leaned forward again, his grinning mouth now against her ear._

_"And I'm the luckiest bastard on the planet to have you to make babies with."_

[][][]

"Okay, I really need to go," Kate said, checking her watch. A few moments went by with her still rooted at her spot on the stool, watching Rick feed their daughter. Both daughter and daddy had food stains all over them already.

Go figure.

Kate's shoulders sagged as she thought about all the things she was going to miss out on. She was completely torn - one the one hand, each time her baby girl smiled or giggled or just looked at her, she wanted to call Montgomery and just quit on the spot. On the other hand, however, she was excited about going back to work, to feel the rush of the chase, the thrill of putting the pieces together, the satisfaction of giving loved-ones closure and putting murderers behind bars.

It was gonna take some juggling to find a balance.

Rick glanced at her, puzzled. "I thought you were leaving," he said, his lips quirking as he lifted Lizzy out of her booster seat.

Kate sighed. "Yeah, I am. I just..."

"The first day is the hardest. It will get better, Babe."

She just nodded, keeping her eyes on the car keys in her hands.

He stepped closer and lifted her chin so that she could meet his eyes. "We'll still be here when you get back, Detective. I promise." Kate laughed, her eyes a little wetter than usual.

Finally she stood up and took a breath. She kissed her baby girl, who was still blissfully ignorant about what was going on. "Bye baby, Mommy loves you so much. I'll see you later," Kate said brushing a hand over her daughter's head and over her soft cheek. She then turned to her husband and leaned in for a goodbye kiss, tongue and heat; she would have to get used to those kisses again. Not her favourite by a long shot.

"Bye. I love you."

He smiled at her. "Love you too. Now go catch some bad guys, Detective."

_[][][]_

_If we never found this love_

_If we never took that road_

_If we hadn't had the heart_

_We wouldn't have this home_

_Love, love will take you_

_Love, love will take you there_

* * *

**A/N: I hope that was enjoyable. Gosh, I wish we could see them married with a kid on the show. That would be so damn adorable. Even more adorable than Kate smiling like an idiot when she woke up next to Castle on 'Cuffed'. ****But, alas, that's probably not going to happen. *Sigh* Thank goodness for fanfic, especially during this Holiday hiatus...**

**Thanks for reading and please review. Thank you kindly.**

**I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes. **

**The lyrics at the end is from Angus and Julia Stone's lovely song, "Love will take you".**


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: Well, aren't I generous? This hasn't happened in like... forever. So enjoy it while it lasts, dear readers. Oh and btw, thank you to everyone who is reading this and reviewing and alerting and favouriting. Much appreciated. Don't you just love this fandom?**

**Enjoy! This chapter picks up from the last one, but keep an eye open - I'm planning on bringing in a more serious story line in the future.**

**Disclaimer: Just the baby is mine. The parents belong to Mr. Marlowe.**

**(Updated version - I spotted a few glaring errors. My apologies. I've written this in the wee hours of the morning)**

* * *

**Chapter 40 – Come and find me**

"Morning Perlmutter," Kate greeted the grumpy ME who glanced up in surprise. Lanie and Esposito were still on their honeymoon, so for next couple of weeks the homicide division of the 12th precinct would have the privilege of working with the _delightful _Dr. Perlmutter.

It was going to be bliss.

He huffed. "Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to grace us with her presence. Welcome back, Beckett. Had enough of playing house with Castle?" He said with a smile, an actual smile. Or maybe rather a smirk.

Perlmutter rarely smiled.

He was always a bit of a douche, but, at least he was an excellent Medical Examiner.

Kate only rolled her eyes and gave him a tight-lipped smile. "No. Why? You miss me?" She shot back.

"Didn't even know you were gone," he replied, his eyes laughing. Even the grumpy ME couldn't deny it – they all had missed her, the 12th precinct's finest (and most attractive) homicide detective.

Most even missed her shadow, her partner. Perlmutter was not one of them.

"I'm glad to see you so excited about having me back, thanks," she shot back sarcastically. He only shook his head and tried not to smile. He went back to examining the body and Kate's attention became fixed on the victim, a young girl in her twenties. She couldn't help but think about Alexis and about calling her the moment she got the opportunity.

Detective Kate Beckett steeled herself and took a breath, putting her armor in place.

She was ready to do this again.

"Alright. What do you have for me?"

[][][]

"Are you having fun, baby girl?" Lizzy shrieked and giggled in response, her small feet kicking into Rick's chest. He was crouched in front of her, gently and slowly pushing her on a swing. She was completely obsessed with swings and even though Mommy didn't like it too much, Daddy occasionally indulged his baby girl. Today, Rick decided that taking her out for some fresh air and playing in the park would be good… and distracting. It was kinda depressing at home without Kate.

But they _were_ going to surprise Mommy with lunch later on.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when a small blur of human limbs launched into the adjacent swing next to them, startling Lizzy.

"Momma!" A young boy of about four with way too much energy and dark spiky hair yelled as he pushed off the ground and started to propel himself forward. "Watch how high I can goes!" He was all vigorous concentration, complete with his tongue peeking out of his mouth and a cutely furrowed brow as he moved back and forth, trying to go higher. Lizzy leaned forward to watch, her little mouth open, totally in awe of the heights the boy was able to achieve.

He was a friggin' rock star.

"Joshua! Get back here!" The boy's mother yelled, jogging towards the swings and looking completely haggard. Rick watched in amusement as the short, petite Soccer Mom-type quietly scolded her son for running off like that. She grabbed his arm and pulled the whining and protesting youngster off the swing.

"But I wanna swing, Mommy!" He all but sobbed, trying to get out of her grasp and getting very close to throwing a tantrum.

"I said no. We're going home now," she hissed, red in the face from exertion and anger. She became aware of Rick and Lizzy and shot the writer an apologetic and sheepish smile. He returned a lopsided one and gave her a slight nod. With that, Joshua and his mother walked off, more like he was dragged away by her.

Rick just shook his head in amusement, suddenly very thankful that he had a daughter and not a mini Rick Castle running around. Now, that kid would be the personification of a sugar rush. Well, Kate had on occasion said that she wouldn't mind having a little Rick running around. He could just imagine it. A boy to wrestle with, to play video games with, to do manly stuff with. He loves his girls – they're the best – but he's kinda outnumbered and having a boy-

Whoa. Hold up. The baby factory is _closed _for production. For now. Well, at least for the next few years. Hopefully not too long, because he would like Lizzy to have someone to play with and just to see Kate pregnant again because she's never been more beautiful-

O-kay. Time to go. Damn, his wife hasn't been back at work for more than four hours and he's already daydreaming about another baby.

Sheesh. He's such a girl.

Lizzy clapped her small hands and grinned at him, complete with about four baby teeth. She was too cute for her own good and had Daddy wrapped around her little finger.

Not that he minded. On the contrary.

He smiled at his adorable daughter, the spitting image of her mother, except for her eyes.

That was all him.

He adjusted her pink cap and tapped her lightly on the nose, making the little girl giggle even more. Rick lifted her out of the swing, cursing the way his knees popped when he stood up. He was getting old. It was depressing.

"C'mon, Sweet Pea." He hugged and kissed her before glancing at his watch. "Time to go and surprise Mommy."

Rick was so enamored by the babbling little human being in his arms that he didn't notice the woman in the shadows watching him like a hawk, snapping pictures of them, of his daughter.

She had been doing this for more than three weeks already because-

she and Richard Castle belonged together.

He was the love of her life. She just knew it. Knew it when they locked eyes, the way he talked with her about the book, the way he smiled at her when he signed his name.

There was only one problem, one obstacle.

Kate Beckett.

[][][]

"Oh come on, Tate! You knew where she would be, you knew her routine." Despite being out of the game for a long time, Kate took to interrogation like a fish to water; she was back on the proverbial bicycle and loving it.

Especially when the suspect was about to break.

The thirty-something man who was confident and cocky and all talk when they started about fifteen minutes ago had been reduced to a sweating, nervous wreck.

He was about to confess. She could feel-

"I- I want a lawyer. I'm not saying anything further. I- I'm done talking with you, Detective."

Shit.

"Fine. You do that, Tate, because believe me, you're gonna need a lawyer, a very good one." With that, she turned and left, shutting the door with a little more force than needed.

Damn.

"So?" Montgomery inquired when she emerged.

"He lawyered up. But I think we got him on DNA." Kate sighed and pulled a hand through her hair, feeling the beginnings of a headache at the base of her skull.

Great.

"Alright, good. Keep me posted, Beckett," the captain said, walking off. He came to a stop and turned back to her. "And Detective?"

Kate's brow furrowed. "Yes Sir?"

He smiled. "I'm glad to have you back."

She returned a small one herself. "It's good to be back." Even though she missed her baby terribly. She glanced at her watch, deciding whether to go for lunch or just to-

"Hey, Castle! Long time no see."

Kate whipped around, surprised and delighted to see her handsome and grinning husband greet all the familiar faces. Their daughter – her baby girl – was glancing around curiously at everyone who was cooing over her like a bunch of aunts and uncles. Kate smiled, beaming and bright, her heart breaking open with affection and softness and tenderness. All the things that she had to put away when she put on that badge and holstered her gun.

Apparently all it took for her to become a puddle of mush was a pudgy, smiling little baby. Apparently that was all it took for a whole precinct full of tough cops to go all mushy and soft.

It was adorable seeing tough, manly cops making funny faces to entertain an almost one-year old.

When Rick spotted her, his grin widened, eyes twinkling. She loved that, loved him for being such a sweetheart. He walked towards his wife, Lizzy in her pram holding out her arms for Mommy, her little hands opening and closing with impatience, with need.

She wanted her mom.

Kate laughed, her chest feeling lighter at the sight of her daughter. "Hey baby," she said softly, lifting her baby out of the pram. Lizzy surprised her by wrapping her small arms around Kate's neck and burrowing into her mother.

Well, at least Kate wasn't the only one who was experiencing a little bit of separation anxiety.

She glanced at Rick, unable to shake off her smile. "What are you doing here?"

He stepped forward and kissed her in greeting, a soft hello. She loved those kisses. "We wanted to surprise you for lunch," he said with a shrug. "It's kinda lonely without you."

Oh, he was looking at her with those adorable puppy-dog eyes.

"I miss you too," she said softly, squeezing his hand before releasing it. She turned and walked off to the break room, carrying her daughter with her husband following, greeting people as he went.

She felt all warm and fuzzy; the frustration of not getting a confession a thing of the past. "So what did you get? Please tell me it's Chinese. I'm starving!"

He grinned and pulled out the bag from her favourite Chinese take-away. "Why do you ever doubt me, Detective?"

"Oh, Richard Castle, I love you," she breathed, adjusting her hold on Lizzy.

He chuckled and started to take out their food as well as Lizzy's lunch. "Right back at you, Mrs. Castle." They sat down as they have done so many times before in the years gone by.

"So, tell me, how's the case going?"

Always partners.

[][][]

It was past seven when she walked through the door, tired but satisfied. They got their man. He had slipped up with disposing his bloody clothes and the murder weapon.

The savvy lawyer couldn't save him.

Kate removed her jacket and kicked off her shoes, her brow furrowing at the absence of her husband and daughter.

"Rick?"

She made her way upstairs and heard the low rumblings of his rich voice. She stopped at the nursery, the door slightly ajar. She quietly peeked inside, seeing the outline of his figure, his broad shoulders in the dim light. Her chest felt tight as she watched, listened to soothing voice of her husband. She loved listening to him, listening to him being a father to their daughter. She loves it when he's being a smart-ass, all twinkly eyes and amused smiles and dirty innuendo. Everything about him. Every role he fulfills. When he's being a nine-year-old on a sugar-rush or her favourite author or a man who would recreate the world in order to protect her, their family.

But she loves him the most when he's being a father, when he gently brushes a large hand over their baby's small skull like he's doing right now, when his face softens in affection whenever he sees his girls, the way he wants to carry their burdens.

They way he gives them the world.

She wanted to be part of that, wanted to bask in the warmth of his love. Everyday, always.

"Hey," Kate said softly, stepping inside, her toes curling against the soft fabric of the carpet.

Rick turned at the sound of her voice and smiled. "Hey," he greeted, his face decorated with gentleness, tender and beautiful.

Her heart pounded as she watched him; his blue eyes warm embers, his mouth her fire, his arms her resting place, his body her home. It suddenly hit her - how much she loved him. How much she was hopelessly in love with him, this man.

The father of her child.

She swallowed and stepped towards where he was sitting in the rocking chair, a children's book open in his lap. A Dr. Suess book. Kate wasn't sure whether it was one he bought especially for Lizzy or whether it was one of his own. She wouldn't be surprised if it was the latter. He was essentially a little boy trapped in a grown man's body.

Well, not always...

"She asleep?" Kate asked, peering into the crib where Lizzy was lying. Long, dark lashes were feathered against her soft, pale skin; her curly hair fell over her forehead and around her cheeks; her pretty, pink mouth was slightly open as she breathed.

She was beautiful.

Rick wrapped an arm around his wife's waist and pulled her down into his lap, holding her close and resting his chin on her shoulder. For a few minutes they sat in silence, just watching their daughter sleep.

"You tired?" He asked after a while, planting a kiss against her hair.

"Mm, not too much." Kate relaxed further into him and sighed. Another few moments passed. "I missed you guys today," she murmured.

He laughed quietly, kissing her cheek. "Same here, Mrs. Castle."

She turned to face him, quirking an eyebrow. "What? Not Detective now?"

He smiled and shook his head, cupping the back of her head. "No. Not here. Here you are Lizzy's mom." He pulled her towards him, kissing her softly, briefly, delicately. Like waiting for a flower to open up. "And my wife." He kissed her again, a little longer, a little more insistent. When he pulled back, Kate saw that unmistakable Castle glint in his eyes. "And my really, really hot sex-kitten."

She slapped a hand against his chest, fighting the smile tugging at her lips. "You're not getting lucky tonight, Castle."

Of course he was.

She got up and kissed her daughter goodnight. Rick followed her, murmuring a sweet goodnight to his baby girl and switched off the light as they went.

"Oh come on, Babe." He wrapped his arms around her from behind once they were out of the nursery, walking them (rather awkwardly) towards their bedroom. "I haven't seen you all day."

She grinned. "Liar. You brought me lunch."

He flipped them around, crowding her against the door. "Yeah, but I wanted to do so, _so_ much more," he said against her skin, placing hot, wet open-mouthed kisses in her neck.

She slowly dragged a long leg up, wrapping it around his one and pressing her hips against him insistently. He growled in response and attacked the buttons of her shirt with gusto.

She loved it when he got impatient.

"Well, I'm here now, Mr. Castle. And I'm all yours."

_[][][]_

_If I could trace the lines that ran_

_Between your smile and your sleight of hand_

_I would guess that you put something up my sleeve_

_Now every time I see your face the bells ring in a far-off place_

_We can find each other this way I believe_

* * *

**A/N: These characters are just so much fun to write! What do you think about the creepy woman? I think that would be an interesting story arc to explore.**

**Anyway, please review and lemme know what you think.**

**Title and lyrics at the end is from the beautiful Josh Ritter song, "Come and find me".**


	41. Chapter 41

**A/N: Hey ya'll! Thank you for the wonderful reviews for the last chapter, much appreciated. Inspiration has hit with this story, so I'm taking advantage of the burst of ideas I'm having. And, well, your great reviews helped. Now this chapter will start off Lizzy's birthday theme and will probably stretch two or three chapters, I'm still not sure. This kinda turned into a filler chapter for this theme. But at least there's lots of fluff and some sexy fun at the end. Oh and a little creepiness with that weird stalker chick. **

**Anyway enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Yada yada yada, yes I know, I know - I don't own them. Just the adorable little baby.**

**Btw, there is a link on my profile to a photo of a little girl I imagine Lizzy would look like - she's adorable! Go check it out if you want a clearer idea of how Lizzy looks like about now.**

* * *

**Chapter 41 – My life would suck without you**

"Beckett," Kate answered curtly, too busy to care if she sounded rude.

It has been a rough few days. She got called out for a double homicide at some ungodly hour four days ago. And they're still struggling with it. She and Ryan on their own because Esposito is only coming back after the weekend. They were close to closing it, but that last piece of the puzzle was still evading them.

Where are the crazy theories when they need them?

To top it off, she's feeling a little off colour today because she only slept for about five hours... and because she and Rick had an argument about how little she is sleeping. They went to bed angry and she got up before they could talk. A carnal sin for a marriage. And to make it worse, she's feeling guilty. It's her baby's birthday in two days' time and she cannot give it her undivided attention.

So, in short, the last two weeks have been... an adjustment for everyone. To put it mildly.

"Uh, hey, Kate," Rick greeted hesitantly. "Is this a bad time?"

Great.

He probably thought she was still pissed at him. She sighed tiredly, feeling affection seeping into her being for her husband who was, at the very least, an incredibly sweet man.

"Hey, no, it's fine. I can talk, Honey," she responded, her voice flowing in gentler tones. Rick let out the breath he didn't know he was holding, a smile cracking open over his face as excitement crashed over him in waves.

"Okay, good. So, I'm here at Party Land, which by the way is huge and freakin' awesome!-"

Ah, there was the Castle she knew. A big kid in a grown man's body. Kate bit her lip to stop from laughing. He was just so damn adorable when he got excited.

"-And they've got these cute lady bug outfits. Don't you think we should get Lizzy one?"

"And embarrass her on her big day? I don't know, Castle. She might never forgive us," Kate said teasingly, grinning as she twirled a piece of her hair. She was flirting with her husband over party plans for their daughter, the previous evening's argument forgotten. He always did that - fight off the shadows lurking in her mind. He always made it light.

"Oh come on, Babe! She would look so adorable! Can you just imagine?"

Actually, she could. And yes, he was right, her daughter would be completely adorable in such a silly outfit.

Awwww.

She felt a little painful tug at her heart strings because she wasn't there with him, picking out an adorable outfit for their adorable daughter. She was standing outside the morgue waiting to look at the mangled bodies of the victims again. She was surprised about how much that affected her, how much it stung.

"Alright, go ahead. After all, you're in charge of this shindig, Daddy." He was of course because she wasn't there. She wasn't there when Lizzy gave her first independent steps last week. She wasn't there when she fell and hit her head the other day. Hell, she wasn't even there to help plan her baby's-

No. No, no, no. She didn't want to go down this rabbit hole again. Her daughter was fine, she didn't lack in anything. She was healthy and happy and loved. She was fine.

But was her mother?

Rick could hear the guilt in her voice, the apology in the roll of her tongue. She didn't need to feel guilty or to apologize. But this was Kate. And she wasn't Kate if she wasn't stubborn.

He sighed. "Kate..."

There was a moment of silence on the other end. "I know, I know," she said softly, almost meekly.

It broke his heart.

"Honey, we've talked about this. You _have_ been helping me. We _have_ been doing this together."

"Yeah, but you're the one who's-"

"-Who's shopping for a cute outfit for our daughter while her mother is out there risking her life to try and create a better one for her little girl."

Oh. Oh, wow.

"Please Kate, stop beating yourself up about this," he said, his voice low and soothing. Comforting. "It's not helping anyone, okay?"

"Okay," she breathed quietly, feeling the weight on her chest ease slightly.

"Good. Let Daddy handle this."

She laughed, her eyes sparkling, the sound sprinkled with loveliness. It wrapped around his heart, the ringing of her delight. He was proud of that because the joy was because of him, because of what he did to, for her.

He made her happy.

"I love you," Kate said suddenly, the words bubbling out, her heart in her voice and words.

He smiled with his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Love you too."

There were a few beats of silence.

"So, did you get the balloons?"

He grinned. "Yeah _and_ party hats."

Oh, Castle.

She smiled and shook her head. "I bet you did."

"Oh, and I also got her another big teddy bear. A white, smiling one with a cute bow tie. Who, thank God, doesn't sing."

He always did this. He always gave more than was asked, than was needed. He always gave more of himself.

She loved him for it.

"Ri-ick," she admonished on a laugh. "She's already got like hundreds of teddy bears. _And_ we got her birthday presents. Remember?"

They had bought her a pink rocking pony - who could sing songs, unfortunately - because their daughter was completely obsessed and in love with ponies. Rick made a promise to buy her a real one once she was old enough to ride on it.

He still had to convince his wife of that particular idea.

In addition to the rocking pony, Lizzy also got a whole stack of books (mostly Dr. Seuss) and classic children's movies that her daddy was going to enjoy with her.

"Yeah, yeah. I just... I want to spoil her. It's her birthday after all."

"I know, Honey, but she's only turning one. She's still going to have many more. We don't want to spoil her _too_ much."

He sighed despondently. "Yeah, I know. But I already compromised on this."

Kate bit back her laugh; she could practically hear the pout in his voice. "Compromised? How so, Mr. Castle?"

"Well, I didn't buy her a puppy."

[][][]

He was handsome, even more so in person. Especially when he smiled. She was almost tempted to walk up to him where he was standing in the aisle, picking out what seemed like some sort of outfit. He was talking on the phone with someone and laughing. She wondered who-

Kate. She heard him say Kate. Her stomach twisted. God, she _hated_ that woman. Kate Beckett was all wrong for him. Couldn't he see it? He was left to play Mr. Mom while she was out gallivanting. Why didn't he see _her_? She was right here, with him. She was helping him, making sure that he was safe, that he had everything that he needed.

She loved him.

Not like that stupid bitch who left him alone with her brat all day while she was out playing cops and robbers. Kate Beckett didn't deserve him.

She did.

She was going to prove to him that she was worthy of him, that he had made a mistake. She was his soul mate, she knew because he told her that. He was always writing her secret messages in his books. Even in the dedications. Those weren't meant for Kate, they were meant for her.

Because he loved her.

[][][]

"Honey, I'm home!" She was in a good mood. They finally closed the double homicide by that afternoon and got the paperwork done before six. She got to be home with her family, she got to see her little girl, spend some quality time with her husband.

"Hey, we're in here," he called out.

Kate frowned and shrugged off her coat and walked towards the office from where she heard his voice.

"Hey, what are you-"

She stopped abruptly when Alexis appeared from behind her father with Lizzy in her arms.

"Alexis!" Kate exclaimed, her beautiful features transforming into a wide smile, lighting up her whole face. She greeted the young woman with a fierce hug, Lizzy in between them.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were only coming tomorrow."

Alexis beamed at her. "Well, I couldn't wait any longer. I wanted to see you guys and come party with my little sis," she said, tickling Lizzy's side causing the little girl to succumb to shrieking giggles.

Kate laughed and wrapped her two girls in another tight hug. "I'm so glad you're here," she whispered. "We've missed you."

Rick cleared his throat, making his presence known. "May I also join the family group hug? Or does this one only include the female members of our clan?"

Kate turned her head towards to her smiling husband who was leaning against the desk, watching them with soft, affectionate eyes. She grinned at him and opened an arm to him. He practically jogged over to them, pressing all of his girls to his chest.

"Grroouuuppp huuggg!"

Kate huffed out a laugh. "Castle, you're crushing me."

He kissed the side of her head, nuzzling her hair. "Shhh, no talking during group hugging."

"Uh, Dad, you're kinda crushing me too," Alexis said. "And also remember I'm holding the tiny human here."

He sighed. "Fiiiiine." He loosened his hold on Kate and dropped his arm from his daughter's shoulders who was still holding a babbling Lizzy.

"Hey baby girl," Kate said, brushing a hand over her daughter's head and kissing each of her cheeks. "I missed you today," she continued, stroking Lizzy's soft, curly hair while the little girl gave her mother a large, adorable smile.

"Is she the only one you missed today?" Rick asked with a quirked eyebrow.

She shared an eye roll with Alexis before glancing back at her daughter and quickly sticking her tongue out, making a face at the little girl. Lizzy cackled loudly in delight. She loved it when her mother made silly faces.

Mommy was the best.

"No, Castle. I didn't just miss her," Kate said turning around, a playful glint in her eyes. He grinned, cocky and confident, while pulling her closer. "I also missed Reggie the doorman terribly."

His smile fell while Kate and Alexis shared a high five, laughing at the expense of the only male in the family. To add insult to injury, his youngest was giggling as well.

"Oh, ha ha. It's good to know where your loyalties lie, dear daughters," he grumbled, pointing a finger at his offspring. One amused, the other one blissfully ignorant and much more interested in sucking on her big sister's necklace. He turned his attention to Kate. "And _you_. You've turned them against me."

She slapped his hand away. "Please, there was no need. I've always had them on my side."

He looked at his daughters in mock horror, again pointing an accusatory finger at them. "Traitors!"

Alexis rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Come on Lizzy Bug, let's go put on your pajamas." She stopped at the door. "Hey, should I order us some pizza or something?"

"Yeah, thanks, Lex, that would be great. I'm starving," Kate answered.

"Okay, cool. So, I'm going to order pizza and then go and change Lizzy." She glanced between them, her expression turning serious and stern. "Now please behave yourselves while we're gone."

"Yes Ma'am," Rick quipped with a mock salute.

Kate laughed. "I'll try my best, but can't make any promises for him," she said, jerking a thumb in her husband's direction. Alexis left with Lizzy, her laughter ringing out throughout the loft.

When Kate turned back to her husband, he was still sulking. She sighed. "What is it, Castle?"

He pouted. "You haven't kissed me yet."

She rolled her eyes again. "You're such a child." She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him hello - she was thorough in her exploration of his mouth, reacquainting herself with the movements of his tongue, languid in her appraisal of his soft lips.

She loved kissing him hello.

"Well, hello there, Mrs. Castle," he murmured against her mouth. "Miss me?"

"You have no idea," she breathed, her mouth sizzling against his, her words molten in his mouth. Her lithe body like liquid heat burning against his. He cupped the back of her skull and kissed her with abandon, his other hand darting downwards to pull her flush against him. They made out like a couple of teenagers for a few minutes.

A couple of frisky teenagers.

Kate choked on a wave of desire when he left her mouth and moved to her jaw and neck; nipping and sucking at her skin.

Marking her.

She wanted to do dirty things to him. She wanted to rip his clothes off, clear his desk and proceed to-

But then she heard Alexis' voice and Lizzy's babbling getting closer.

Shit.

"Castle." It was meant to be a warning. It sounded like a breathless, pleading whimper that sent a jolt of arousal straight to his groin. He grunted his approval, his hips insistently and instinctively rocking against hers, picking up speed. She had to resist the moan of pleasure that wanted to escape.

He was just so, _so_ good at this. At loving her. At making love to her.

"Castle... T-the kids." He wanted laugh at her choice of her words and point out that Alexis was not a kid anymore. But he was much rather interested in getting rid of her shirt.

"Rick," she said firmly, finally pulling away from his grasp. Panting, heart pounding, mouth swollen, eyes wide and dark and feral as she worked to close the few buttons he had managed to open. He could see her pink, lacy bra.

Holy hotness.

"Later," she promised, her voice dark and husky. Her bedroom voice, the voice he heard gasping wordlessly in is ear while her nails dug into his back, while her body arched against his and just before she-

"Hey guys, are you done making out in there?" Alexis called from the living room.

Kate let out a startled laugh and dropped her head to his collarbone. Rick just groaned.

"We're coming, Lex," Kate called out after a moment.

"In more ways than one," Rick muttered, his hands itching to grope something, his eyes dark and dilated.

It's been a lean two weeks.

She bit her lip and watched him from beneath her lashes, leaning up to whisper promises into his ear. Hot and heavy. "Later, Stud. I'm not on call this weekend. So, I'm yours... All. Night. Long," she purred before sucking on his earlobe causing every last drop of blood in his quivering, needy body to rush south.

Holy shit.

He dropped his head and closed his eyes, trying to control his breathing, his erratic heartbeat, every throbbing pulse of desire. The primal urge to rip her clothes off and take her on the desk or any other surface for that matter. He would never, ever win this game. Not that he minded. But, damn, she always got him to unravel so easily.

He loved her for it.

When Rick looked up again, she was standing at the door and watching him with a smirk.

"I'll just... give you a few minutes," Kate said, pointedly glancing at his pants.

He narrowed his eyes at her, stopping himself from chasing after her. "Katherine Castle, I'm gonna make you pay." She resisted the shiver that ran down her spine at the dangerous, gruff tones flooding his voice. At the way he wanted her so completely, the way his body burned for her, the way his eyes slowly perused her - hungry and commanding and all-consuming.

Like a predator. A sexy predator.

Oh, she wanted him. Badly. But Rick Castle didn't need to know how much he affected her.

So she resorted to her age-old weapon of choice: teasing. And it worked.

Every. _Delicious_. Time.

Her grin grew wicked. "I'm looking forward to it, Mr. Castle. So very, _very_ much."

He growled - literally _growled_ - and stepped towards her. She laughed and darted out the door, infinitely pleased by her womanly guile to turn her husband into horny teenager who was unable to control himself.

Ah, victory was sweet.

_[][][]_

_I'm gonna start a fire_

_You're gonna feel the heat_

_I'm gonna burn for you_

_You're gonna melt for me_

_Come on, Come on in to my arms_

_Come on, Come on_

_Give in to me_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so this totally turned into something different and I'm not completely happy with it, but I just thought that this was the best place to end it. And why not end it with a little bit of sexy, teasing Caskett? So, the next few chapters will be about Lizzy's birthday, as all of you could probably gather from this. I will also continue to touch upon the crazy stalker woman. Tell me, on a scale of 1 to 10, how creepy is she? **

**Please review as always! It definitely helps to keep the muse happy.**

**Apologies for any spelling/grammar mistakes.**

**The title at the beginning is the Kelly Clarkson song of the same title and the lyrics at the end is from a lovely Faith Hill song, "Give in to Me".**


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: Hi ya'll! Sorry for the delay, I had to figure out where to go from where we left off. I started writing this chapter, but it just felt wrong somehow and I kinda lost my mojo for a little bit. But, luckily, the muse has returned and here we are. Thank you for your patience - I am indebted to you, loyal readers. **

**Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: blah, blah, blah. We all know that the brilliant Mr. Marlowe owns them.**

**Oh and-**

**Yay! Castle and the dreamy Nathan Fillion won! About damn time too! Now Stana just needs to get an award. Seriously, what does that woman still need to do to get some recognition?**

******I love this show and this fandom so, so much it's unhealthy. I just want to convert everyone so that they can share in my Obsessive Castle Disorder. I want no cure.**

******(Updated version - spotted a few errors)**

* * *

**Chapter 42 - I and Love and You**

"Well, that's the last of it," Rick said, stepping off the ladder. He watched his handiwork and nodded in satisfaction. The loft resembled a day at Disneyland with cartoon characters, colourful balloons and streamers everywhere.

He turned to look at Kate who was washing the dishes, humming in that rich, velvety voice that he has heard so many times when she cradled their daughter. He watched her for a moment, feasting his eyes on the beauty. His eyes became fixed on the long climb of her sunkissed legs (_thank you Lord for short shorts!)_, the skin soft to the touch, but with the promise of brute force hidden in the lean, strong muscles beneath that soft skin. The way those long, _long_ legs usually wrap around him in passionate-

"Staring is still creepy, Castle," Kate said, her voice dancing with amusement. She turned around, a smile flirting with the corner of her mouth, her mirth-filled eyes teasing him.

He choked out a laugh, surprised and pleased at the same time. He cleared his throat and threw an arm out towards his handiwork. "So? What do you think?"

Kate walked towards her husband, a drying towel slung over her shoulder, a strand of unruly hair curving around her plane of her cheek, her toes bending against the hardwood floor. She came to stand beside him, slowly tracking her eyes over the scene - the streamers hanging from the roof, the colourful balloons floating from every corner of the loft and the famous Disney characters that were just... _everywhere._

Lizzy's first birthday bash was going to be a blast.

"I'd say-" she turned towards her husband, eyes soft and affectionate, a hand curling around his elbow. "-that you are the best daddy in the whole world," she murmured, pressing a kiss against his cheek. "And that our daughter is the luckiest girl to have you as a father," she said before kissing him softly, her lips feather-light in her appreciation, a taste of unspoken gratitude and pride.

He grinned against her mouth. "Mmm. I am good at birthdays, aren't I?"

Kate wrapped her arms around him, pulling her flush against his body, her lips hovering tantalizingly close to his.

"You sure are, Mr. Castle."

[][][]

_"Rick, where are we going? I told you, there is no need to do anything." She knew she sounded like a petulant child, but she was tired after a long day of work and she just wanted to have a quiet evening at home with her husband, a nice dinner and maybe a bubble bath and a good book later on. She didn't want to do something for her birthday because- __"We had our anniversary just two weeks ago."_

_"Quiet, woman, and just follow me," Rick responded with a cheeky grin, practically dragging his wife along the shady-looking little alleyway. _

_Kate scowled at him. "Don't tell me to be quiet and don't call me woman," she grumbled sourly. He had insisted on them making a quick detour after leaving the 12th. Unfortunately, she gave in and now her feet were killing her in those six-inch heels and she could feel a headache starting to form at the base of her skull. So, it was her birthday. __Big deal. Everyone on the planet had one of those once a year. _

_Rick sighed and stopped walking, turning around to face her. "Fine, I won't. But would you just let me do this, babe? Please?" He was watching her with those big, sincere, puppy-dog eyes all the while caressing her hand with his thumb. It was kinda hypnotizing. She could feel the cool metal of his wedding band against her fingers. _

_One year._

_They have been married for one year (and two weeks). A year filled with unforgettable memories of building a home together, crazy, sometimes dangerous cases, nasty fights, hot make-up sex, a_ lot _of hot_ _sex in general, the forging of their respective stories into one narrative, into a book of love._

_One wonderful, exciting, head-over-heels year._

_She smiled at him, affection lining the curve of her lips, love flooding her eyes. "Yeah, okay. Sure." She gave him one, two quick kisses, a hand cradling his jaw. "I'm sorry. Lead the way, Mr. Castle."_

_He smiled at her, boyish exuberance giving life to his features, his whole being. "Come on, we're almost there. You're gonna love it, Kate. Trust me." _

_She couldn't help but smile like an idiot at the adorableness that was her husband. While he was chatting away, she was watching him closely - the way his shoulders flexed beneath the material of his clothing (so very,_ very_ sexy), the way his hair flopped over his forehead, his animated hand gestures as he talked, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled._

_Beautiful. He was her big, beautiful man._

_She was shaken out of her thoughts when they suddenly came to a stop in front of an inconspicuous metal door. "...And here we are," Rick said with a flourish, his eyes twinkling with delight. _

_She looked at the door and then back at her husband. "This is it? Rick, where are we?" Her interest was definitely piqued now. _

_His grin grew. "Time to find out." He let go of her hand and stepped forward, knocking on the door three times._

_After a while, the door opened, revealing a tall, scrawny-looking man with long, dark hair, wearing paint-covered overalls. He smiled broadly upon seeing who his visitors were._

_"Rick! Good to see you," the man said, extending his hand._

_"You too, Jackson," Rick replied, shaking his hand. He turned towards Kate._

_"Oh and you must be Kate," __Jackson said, his smile widening as she held out a hand towards the detective. "_Pleased to meet you. I've heard so much about you already."

_She returned a smile, her eyes cutting towards her husband before turning back to Jackson. "Uh, hi. Pleased to meet you too," she replied, shaking his hand._

_"Please, come on in." He gestured them to enter. "Excuse the mess, I've been quite busy." Jackson led them through his studio, paintings and various works of art scattered around the large room._

_"Is it ready?" Rick asked._

_Jackson turned around and smiled. "Yeah. Just give me a sec while I get it." With that he disappeared into another room._

_"Mmm, let me guess, a painting," Kate said, tapping a finger against her mouth, her lips curving into a grin. _

_Rick turned to her and smiled, his eyes warm. "You should be a detective," he said softly, taking her hand in his again and leaning down to kiss her cheek and the corner just beneath her right eye. Her brow furrowed slightly. She expected him to be a little smug and impressed with himself, but there was a tenderness, a gentleness coating his every touch, every movement of his mouth, every expression on his face._

_But before she could say anything more, Jackson came back, carrying a large canvas. "Well, here it is," he said, placing the canvas on an easel. He excused himself and stepped away, revealing the painting. It was a scene of a woman and a little girl, presumably a mother and her daughter, sitting on the floor opposite each other.__ The little girl was watching her mother while the woman was busy putting what seemed like a ballet shoe on her daughter's small foot. The scene was decorated with light and illuminated colours; streams of sunlight adorned the background, giving it a dreamlike quality. The little girl and the woman were both smiling, but their faces were unrecognizable due to the impressionist style of the painting. However, something about the small, intimate scene struck Kate. She stepped closer, her brow creasing as she looked at the scene. There was just something about it. Something vaguely familiar. She had a faint memory of her and her mother in a similar-_

_Oh. This was it. Oh... wow. _

_She whipped around, eyes wide, her mouth parted in wonder. Rick was watching her with a small, serene, closed-lipped smile; his eyes bathed in softness. She slowly stepped closer to him, her parted mouth curving into a wide, dazzling smile that revealed all of her joy. His heart stuttered at the sight. She was at her most beautiful when happiness was made home in the curl of her mouth, in the glittering sparkle of her eyes. And it was because of him. This unbridled, untamed joy that gave wings to her beauty was because of him._

_"Do you like it?" Rick asked softly._

_Kate looked at the painting again. She and her mother, a cherished moment between a mother and her daughter, her little girl. She could almost feel her heart breaking open with a lightness, a gentleness that stilled everything inside of her, that calmed all the stormy seas. _

_"I..." she started, but stopped, shaking her head in amazement; that smile still parting her lips and teeming in her eyes. "It's beautiful. So, so beautiful," she rasped, feeling the tears in her voice, her eyes already wet. "Thank you, Rick." She turned to look at her husband again who was, by now, grinning like an idiot. _

_Adorable man._

_Kate suddenly wrapped herself around him in a fierce hug, burying her face in his neck, her nose pressed against his skin where the musky scent of his cologne still lingered strongly. She took a shaky breath and placed a kiss against his jaw, his cheek before whispering another quiet 'thank you' into his ear. _

_"Anything for you, Kate," he responded before feathering a few kisses on her cheek and down the corner of her mouth. _

_She finally let go of him and wiped at her eyes, slowly shaking her head, happiness still lifting the corners of her mouth. "How-"_

_"Remember when we organized all of our photo albums?"_

_She nodded and her smile grew. That was a fun day accompanied by a lot of laughter. They had ended up on the living room floor, family photo albums strewn all over the carpet, while the two of them rolled around in a fit of giggles after discovering photos of Kate's grunge rock-phase and Rick's prep school days._

_"Well, I saw that photo of you and your mom where she was putting on your ballet shoes. And you were in that adorable tutu. I just remembered the look on your face when you talked about it. That gentleness, that fondness. It was just... beautiful. You were just so beautiful. So, I thought, why not do something to make that moment even more... memorable," he finished with a shrug and a shy, lopsided smile. _

_Gosh, she was so in love with this man. _

_"I love it and I love you, Mr. Castle," Kate replied, weaving her arms around her neck again. "I'm a lucky woman to have you."_

_He grinned and kissed her cheek. "Yeah, well, third time's a charm for me." She smiled widely and he couldn't help but kiss her then, drinking in that smile, that joy. "I love you."_

[][][]

"Mmm, I left a mark," he rumbled against her skin, tracing his handiwork with a finger. "Sorry." Rick grinned and continued to place lazy kisses on her shoulder and in her neck.

Kate huffed a laugh and turned around to face her husband, all adorable blue eyes and floppy hair and stubbly cheeks. Sleepy and sexy.

And oh-so-deliciously naked beneath the sheets.

"You're definitely _not_ sorry. In fact, you seem quite pleased with yourself," she murmured, pulling a leg up over his hip and purposefully brushing against him. His smile faltered and her grin grew.

Such a tease.

"Katherine Castle," Rick warned with absolutely no conviction. He loved her teasing. Absolutely loved it.

She bit her lip, dark eyes toying with him. "Yeah?" She was gorgeous dressed in only white sheets, pale sunlight and glorious, _glorious_ nudity.

He was in such trouble.

"Don't tease me," he breathed against her throat, lightly biting and soothing her pulse point with his tongue. Her hips jerked violently in response, heart rate jumping. Rick grinned against her skin.

Ah, sweet victory.

"_You're_ being the tease, Richard Castle," she panted into his ear in her bedroom voice; heat and fervor and lust flavouring each syllable.

So, so sexy. And arousing.

Rick flipped his wife over, possessing her with his mouth and tongue and teeth; his body heavy and warm and sexy as hell on top of her.

"Not if I plan to follow through."

Oh, yes please.

Kate's legs fell open up on a moan, cradling his hips within the frame of hers. She welcomed his tongue into her wet, burning mouth and pulled him down further on top of her, body arching into his. His hips rocked slowly against her, driving both of them to the edge; the movement a tormenting promise.

"Castle," Kate groaned, clutching at his shoulders and scratching his back.

Way beyond turned-on.

He continued to place feathery kisses all along her jaw line, the slope of her throat, her collarbone and in the valley between her breasts.

"Patience, lover... _patience_," he mumbled, his breath wafting over her flesh.

"Shut up," Kate grumbled while wrapping a leg higher around his waist, making her message crystal clear:

_Take. Me. NOW._

"Feisty. I like it," he said with a smile before invading her mouth again.

She whimpered in response, unable to form any coherent thoughts while her husband's talented hands and mouth were doing very talented things to her. And driving her insane, completely bonkers. They were so different, even in this: he liked it slow and sensual, she liked it quick and dirty.

Yin and Yang - a perfect fit.

They had quick and dirty (twice) last night. So, this morning was going to be slow and sensual. And thorough - very, _very_ thorough. Just the way he liked it. She was not on call this weekend, after all, and it was still early, barely 7h30. They still had some time before-

The doorbell rang.

-someone interrupted.

Rick grunted in disapproval, his breathing laboured. "Seriously?"

The doorbell rang again after a few moments of heavy breathing and hoping that the interruption would go away.

"Castle," Kate said, pushing on his shoulder and lowering her legs from his waist. "Come on. Up and off."

He rolled off her onto his back, eyes closed, jaw clenched, heart pounding. Everything hard. Kate got up and got dressed in his boxers and one of her t-shirts, watching her very sexy, very aroused husband with a smirk. Hopefully they could still have that morning delight-

The doorbell ran for the third time, snapping Kate out of her mind's wanderings.

She sighed, threw on his robe and headed downstairs, hair tousled, sexed up and frustrated.

She opened the door and was surprised by by the presence of a delivery man at their door so early. "Hi, can I help you?"

"Uh, hi. Yes, uh, yeah. Here's a delivery for a Mr. Castle," a young delivery man said, staring openly at Kate.

"Well, I'm his wife, so I can sign for it," she replied with a small smile, holding out a hand to sign the receipt.

The young man shifted uncomfortably. "Uh, ma'am, I- I have specific instructions that _Mr._ Castle has to sign for this package. And also to make sure that _he_ gets it."

Kate frowned. "My husband isn't available right now. Can't I just-"

"Hey, who's at the door?" Rick called out, bouncing down the stairs, his hair flopping (adorably) over his forehead. He was dressed in a pair of pajama pants and a white t-shirt, looking calm and collected.

"Here's a delivery for you," Kate replied, eyeing the delivery man suspiciously making him gulp at her intense perusal. _"You_ have to sign."

His eyes lit up. "A present? For me?" He smiled at her. "Honey, you shouldn't have."

Kate rolled her eyes and stepped away. "Oh, I didn't, Castle. Maybe it's one of your _deranged_ fans."

Little did she know...

[][][]

_"Looks like I have a fan."_

_"Yeah, a really deranged fan."_

_He fought a grin."Oh, you don't look deranged to me."_

_Wait. What?_

_Shit._

_"What?"_

_She was cute. An intimidating hard-ass with a badge and a gun, but cute nonetheless. Well, actually she was hot, _really, really _hot. Striking, gorgeous face; beautiful, dark eyes; a strong jaw line; a soft, delicious-looking mouth. He bet she tasted like strawberries and cream. And maybe a little vodka._

_Detective Kate Beckett. Mm, he was intrigued._

_"'Hell hat no fury'? Angry wiccans out for blood? Only hardcore Castle groupies read that one," he remarked with a lopsided grin, his eyes laughing._

_He was smirking at her. Arrogant, self-absorbed, sexy-_

_No. No, no. Stop it. He wasn't _that _good-looking._

_"D-do any of these groupies ever write you letters," she said, flustered. 'Damn, pull yourself together, Kate'._

_He nodded._

_"Disturbing letters?"_

_"Oh, all my fan mail is disturbing. It's an occupational hazard."_

_"Because sometimes in cases like this we find that the killer attempts to-_

_"-contact the subject of his obsession." She stared at him in surprise. "I'm also pretty well versed in psychopathic methodologies. Another occupational hazard." He sat forward, leaning in closer to this beautiful mystery of a woman. "And do you know, you have gorgeous eyes?"_

_Ugh. Lame. Seriously? She had to resist the urge to roll her (_gorgeous_) eyes... again. And ignore _his_ gorgeous eyes._

_"So, I take it you won't have any objection to us going through your mail."_

_"Knock yourself out." She got up. "Can I get copies of those?"_

_She frowned. "Copies?"_

_"I have this poker game. It's mostly other writers. Patterson, Cannell. You know, best-sellers." Really? He was name-dropping now. What an arrogant ass. "You have no idea how jealous those would make them."_

_She was still confused. "Jealous?"_

_"That I have a copy-cat. Oh my gosh, in my world that's the red badge of honour. That's the criminal 'Cooper's Town'."_

_She came forward, her face inches as she towered over him, lean and tall and sexy as hell. _

_Mmm, feisty..._

_"People are dead, Mr. Castle."_

_"I'm not asking for the bodies. Just... the pictures."_

_Did he really think those baby blues and little boy expression and sexy, _sexy _stubble was going to make Kate Beckett cave? Ha! She was stronger than that._

_She gave him a brief, sarcastic smile. "I think we're done here, Mr. Castle."_

_Little did they know..._

[][][]

She camped outside his building waiting for the delivery man to get back. She saw him go in with the package and was anxious to know whether it was delivered or not. Her hands felt clammy and her heartbeat erratic while she paced on the sidewalk across the street. She glanced up again at the top loft, hoping to see something like the last hundred times she did that. Nothing. Well, no worries, she'll be seeing him soon. Maybe even in said loft. While he made her dinner... or breakfast. It wouldn't be long now. They were meant-

She spotted the delivery man emerging from the doors sans any packages in his hands and stopped pacing, smiling widely. He got her gift on their three month anniversary. He was going to read the message and he was going to remember her.

He just had to.

She glanced at her watch and sighed - she had an appointment with Dr. Burke today and couldn't miss another one. She already missed her last three appointments. She cut her eyes one last time to his loft, her lips curling.

_'Soon. Very, very soon.'_

[][][]

"Wow. I thought, I had nutty fans. But this... is just... _bizarre_."

"What is?" Alexis inquired, bouncing down the stairs still in her pajamas.

Rick glanced up to his daughter, trying to smile. "Uh... just some fan mail."

"Really strange fan mail," Kate added while cajoling a cranky Lizzy into another bite of oatmeal.

A fan sent him a signed copy of his book, the latest Nikki Heat-novel. With red lipstick kisses on the first pages of the book. Where he had signed it.

Mm, weird.

He turned to the dedication page again where his dedication to Kate was scrapped out and replaced with:

_I love you. We belong together. _

"That is just... creepy, Dad," Alexis commented, leaning over his shoulder to read the strange message.

"You really _do_ have deranged fans, Castle," Kate said while wiping her daughter's hands. She tried to smile, but there was an anxiousness eating away at her. Something about this was off. Call it instinct or intuition or just a gut feeling - her Spidey senses were tingling.

"Yeah. That was... interesting," Rick said, putting the book - distorted gift or whatever it was - away and attempted to smile. He also felt uneasy. Something about his was off. But that uneasiness melted away when he heard his baby girl's delighted giggling, thoroughly amused by the game of peek-a-boo her mother and big sister were playing with her. He smiled softly as he watched them.

Kate turned to look at him, a wide, beaming smile decorating her face. Utterly beautiful. She had Lizzy in her arms, the little girl an adorable, giggling mass of plump limbs while Alexis kept on entertaining her little sister, her hands on Kate's shoulders.

He was so in love with them - his girls, his family, the beating of his heart.

[][][]

_She's talkin' to me with her voice_

_Down so low I barely hear her_

_But I know what she's sayin'_

_I understand because my heart and hers are the same_

* * *

**A/N: Well, I hope you enjoyed that. So, in the next chapter, we'll finally get to Lizzy's first birthday bash. I'm probably going to give crazy stalker woman a rest for that chapter because that's probably going to be all adorable and filled with Casketty goodness. Oh, speaking of Casketty goodness, how freakin' awesome was 'Til death do us part'? I loved it, so funny and sweet.**

**Anywho, please review and tell me what ya think! I'm eternally grateful for all the kind reviews already.**

**I apologize for any grammar/spelling mistakes. It's like 2:45 in SA.**

**Title - Avett Brothers' song, 'I and Love and You'; lyrics at the end - Avett Brothers' song, 'January Wedding'.**


	43. Chapter 43

**A/N: *Waves* Hehe, uh, remember me? Yeah, uhm, I- I'm sorry. I started a new job. That's all I got. Oh and I had a bit of writer's block - the muse deserted me for a while. This is the final chapter of Lizzy's birthday-theme (finally!) and I really, really struggled with it. Once again I apologize for the delay in writing. My bad.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them now, won't own them ever. **

* * *

**Chapter 43 - Nothing But Love**

"Hey Dad!" Jim Beckett was greeted by his daughter amid a racket of voices, music and laughing. Kate was grinning widely at him while an excited Lizzy bounced in her arms.

"Hey Katie," Jim hugged his daughter with a large smile. His smile grew when he turned his attention to his granddaughter.

"And hello to the birthday girl! Hey sweetie," he cooed. The little girl giggled and held out her arms for her grandfather who happily scooped her up.

She had her grandpa wrapped around her finger and the two of them were as thick as thieves.

"How are you, Dad?" Kate asked over her shoulder, trying to dodge Ryan's two rascals running around her while being chased by Uncle Espo.

Jim briefly took his eyes off Lizzy to look at his daughter. "Uh, I'm well, thank you, sweetie. How have you been now that you're back at work?"

Kate sighed as they came to a stop at the kitchen counter, taking a moment to pour her father a class of soda and handing it to him.

"It's been an adjustment for all of us. I have to get used to working long hours again." She glanced at her smiling daughter, rubbing a hand over her small foot. "And we all have to get used to the fact that I'm not here all the time anymore."

Jim studied his daughter closely. "It's been difficult."

It wasn't a question.

Kate shifted her eyes back to her father. He knew her so well. Her mouth twitched at the knowledge.

"Yeah," she admitted softly after a moment. "Yeah, it has."

"And you feel guilty?"

She nodded and fixed her eyes on Lizzy who had a little hand plastered against her Grandpa's cheek.

"Yeah."

Jim let out a soft chuckle and shook his head, adjusting Lizzy in his arms. "You're just like your mother, you know that?" Her eyes snapped back to his, widening in surprise. "Too damn hard on yourself." His smile softened.

Kate felt a pair of arms encircle her waist. "See? I'm not the only one who believes that," Rick said, pressing a kiss against her cheek. He turned his attention to his father-in-law, stretching out a hand. "Hey, Jim. How are you?"

"Hey, Rick," Jim returned the greeting, taking the younger man's hand. "I'm well thanks. Especially when I get to see this little one." He tickled his granddaughter who erupted in a fit of shrieking giggles.

"I can't believe she's already a year old," Rick commented rather morosely, slinging an arm around Kate's shoulders.

"Yeah, they grow up too fast," Jim said, his eyes still on Lizzy. "Believe me, I know."

[][][]

_"Hey, Dad," Kate greeted, hugging her father closely. He noticed her large, beaming smile, the way that joy seemed to radiate out of every pore of her skin. She was happy. And his heart wanted to burst open with gratitude for that. For so very long his daughter wandered around like a ghost, stumbled in the shadow of their tragedy. Now, she was living a full, complete life. _

_And Jim Beckett was convinced that it had everything to do with the man standing in front of him, wearing a twin large, beaming smile. He wondered briefly what-_

_Ah. _

_He must have asked her. _

_The older man's mouth curved upwards._

_"Rick, hi." He clasped the younger man's hand tightly and patted him on the back, ushering him inside. "How are you?"_

_"Good. More than good actually," Kate said, the words bubbling out of her mouth. She was bouncing on her feet and twining her hands, seemingly very excited about something. It reminded him of when she was a little girl. _

_Adorable. _

_Jim's smile grew as he watched his daughter and the lovestruck man looking her with such tender affection._

_"Oh and why's that, Katie?" He asked, the smile seeping into his tone. He gestured for them to sit. He watched on in amusement as the two lovebirds glanced at each other, a silent conversation going on. Finally, Kate turned her gaze back to her father, her hand finding Rick's._

_"Dad," she started, her lips parting in a grin. "We're getting married."_

_Jim smiled and nodded. "I know."_

_Immediately his daughter's smile fell as Rick burst out laughing. "You know?" She inquired, sounding put out and suddenly very disappointed. "But how-" Her expression sobered and she cut her eyes towards Rick. "You asked for his permission?" Her voice was soft, a little awed._

_The younger man shrugged and offered a lopsided smile. "Of course I did." He briefly glanced at Jim. "That's what I'm supposed to do, right?"_

_Kate bit her lip, her eyes struggling to contain their glimmer. "I love you," she said softly, leaning in to brush her mouth against his, a hand at his jaw. The kiss lasted for several seconds and after a while Jim cleared his throat causing the two lovers to break apart slowly._

_"Katie, I only agreed to let him marry you because I want grandbabies."_

_Kate barked out a surprised laughed. "Dad! That's not happening anytime soon!"_

_"I don't mind soon," Rick commented casually, sharing a wink with his future father-in-law._

_Her head snapped in his direction. "Uh, we've only been engaged for like two days, Castle. And by the way, I don't feel comfortable having this conversation in front of my father." Jim laughed and got up from his seat, making his way to the kitchen. __Once her father was out of the room, Kate flashed her lover a dirty, dangerous grin._

_"Besides, I want to have you all to myself for the first few years." She leaned in, her cheek against his, her mouth at his ear. "On. Every. Surface."_

[][][]

"Okay, time for the birthday cake!" Kate announced with a wide, beaming grin while carrying the large Micky Mouse-inspired birthday-cake. Lizzy was bouncing excitedly in her grandmother's arms, clapping her tiny hands and giggling like crazy. She was now wearing her cute lady-bug smock dress – red with large black polka dots – complete with the wings and feelers on top of her head.

Utterly adorable.

Daddy, of course, was taking all the credit for buying the outfit. Mommy rolled her eyes and reminded Daddy that _she_ was the one to dress their daughter that morning.

"Come on, Kiddo, let's go make you wish," Martha said before kissing her granddaughter's cheek with a red-lipstick smack, making the little girl giggle even more.

"Dad, do you have the camera ready?" Alexis inquired.

"Yeah, it's rolling."

The chorus of happy birthday rang out and Kate blew out the single candle on Lizzy's cake, the little girl squirming excitedly in her booster seat and reaching her hands out towards the Micky Mouse-inspired cake.

Kate looked up at her husband; mouth sliding open into a radiating smile, delight singing in her eyes.

Gorgeous.

His breath hitched. She was just beautiful; glowing, unguarded and carefree in this moment. So very different from the hard-boiled, no-nonsense, power-suit wearing detective he met those many years ago. She was stunning and hot and all kinds of sexy back then and he was immediately in lust and intrigued of course. But now, dressed in a white floral summer dress (very feminine and un-Beckett-like) and laughing at him like that with her tongue caught in between her teeth - happy and in love - she was gorgeous. He wanted to kiss her, taste the joy in the curve of her mouth, bathe in her beauty.

Share their love.

"Did you get that?" Kate asked, walking towards him; her dark eyes sparkling.

He returned a grin. "Sure did, babe."

"Good. I want to watch it tonight," she said, wrapping an arm around his waist, pressing herself against his body. He pulled her closer and placed a kiss against her temple, nuzzling her hair.

"Our baby is a year old," Kate said after a few moments as they watched their daughter getting icing smeared all over her face and little hands thanks to Grandpa and Grandma's efforts.

He sighed. "Yeah. It went by quickly."

"Too quickly," Kate muttered.

Rick glanced down at her, his brow furrowing and amusement ghosting over his mouth. "It's not like she's moving out tomorrow, love."

She sighed again. "I know." Kate lifted her head from his shoulder, glancing up at her husband. "It's just," she started, pursing her lips. "She's growing up so fast and changing everyday. I don't want to miss anything "

He smiled, softness lining the curve of his lips. "You're not going to miss anything."

Before they could continue the conversation, Alexis called out to them.

"Come one, guys! Time for presents." Both Rick and Kate laughed at the young woman's enthusiasm - she was seemingly more excited about the presents than her baby sister.

[][][]

_"So. How many do you want?" _

_Kate glanced up at her fiancée. "How many of what, Castle?" She asked, lifting the glass of wine to her mouth. They were back at the loft after visiting her father and sharing the news of their engagement._

_"Kids," he answered simply._

_ She nearly choked to death._

_After coughing a lung out, Kate finally responded; caught off guard and completely incredulous. "W-what?" _

_"We're going to have to talk about it eventually. And I was just wondering since your dad mentioned it this afternoon." He grinned at her. "I don't have a number by the way. I would have a whole football team with you if that's what you want."_

_Ah, that was sweet. In a weird Castle-like way._

_She laughed nervously and carefully placed the glass of wine on the coffee table. "Uh, I- I haven't thought about it yet, Rick." She rubbed her forehead and glanced at him, a small smile playing on the edge of her lips. "Of course one day I would like to you know... have a baby, become a mother," she said quietly. "How many? I don't know. All I know is that I want that with you. I want a family with you."_

_Rick smiled, his eyes warm and affectionate. "I want that with you too," he said softly, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. _

_He kissed her, his large hands cradling her face, fingers dancing over her cheeks. Her lips unlocked under his, allowing him entrance into her mouth. She nipped at his lower lip and slid her tongue past his teeth to explore the wet, delicious cave of his mouth. Her sanctuary. He groaned, the sound echoing off her matching moans. He gripped her thigh and waist and lifted her up into his lap into a straddling position, mouth and tongue hot against her jaw._

___"I want you to be happy. So very much, Kate. You deserve to be happy," he breathed against her skin, his voice gruff. _

"You_ make me happy." She panted, her mouth against his ear while her hands fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. "I want you. You're all I want right now." She undulated on top of him, her hips pressing intimately against his._

___He gasped and gripped her tighter, his mouth at her collarbone, the words leaping out of his heart. _

___"God, I love you so much."_

[][][]

"She's completely in love with it."

"Yeah, I knew she would be."

"She's not gonna get off it, is she?"

He laughed and shook his head. "Well, no. I tried to pick her up earlier and she kinda freaked out," he said. "Look. She's half-way asleep on it already."

Lizzy was sprawled out on top of her white and pink rocking pony - still in her Lady Bug outfit - and fading fast. It was past her bedtime and after an eventful and exciting day, the little girl was exhausted.

But she was holding on to the toy like the little trooper she was.

Kate smiled and stepped towards her daughter who was regarding her with sluggish, sleepy eyes.

"Come on, baby girl. Time to get you to bed." Kate scooped up the little girl and despite the whiny and tired protests she received (so much like Daddy), Lizzy dropped her head onto Kate's shoulder and twined her small baby fingers around a strand of her mother's hair.

"Say goodnight to Daddy."

"Night Sweet Pea," Rick murmured, brushing a large hand gently over her small skull and planted a kiss against her forehead. "Sleep tight and don't let the bed bugs bite." He trailed a finger over Lizzy's chubby cheek before blowing a raspberry in her neck, surprising her and making the little girl giggle.

Kate carried their baby girl upstairs, softly singing to her as she did so many times to get her to sleep while her thoughts drifted back to the first day after her daughter's birth.

[][][]

_Tiny. She was tiny. And just so, so beautiful. Perfect with all ten fingers and all ten toes._

_Kate brushed a finger over the soft, dark hair on top of her baby's head, leaning down to place yet another kiss against her forehead. Her little person. Their little person was finally here. They could finally see her, touch her, hold her. _

_"I love you," Kate whispered for the umpteenth time. It was just her and Lizzy; Daddy went home to change. Daddy. And now she was Mommy. Suddenly it hit her, squeezing the breath out of her lungs. _

_She was a mother. _

_The mother of this little squirming creature in her arms. She had to swallow past the lump in her throat again, had to blink through the tears again. _

_It felt surreal._

_Kate barely noticed the nurses coming in and out of the room. Barely noticed the world around her. She was watching her daughter as she slept in her arms, small and vulnerable and completely dependent. It was scary and overwhelming and wonderful and beautiful._

_Mostly overwhelming._

_"It never stops you know."_

_Kate's head snapped up at her mother-in-law's soft intrusion. "Martha, hi," she greeted with a wide smile. "What never stops?"_

_The older woman came to stand beside the bed, gently touching her granddaughter's cheek._

_"This feeling," Martha answered, her eyes fixed on Lizzy. She lifted her eyes to Kate, her gaze tender. "This feeling that you've never done anything better than this right here. The love you feel. It never stops. It just grows and grows and grows."_

_Kate nodded, her smile widening as she looked at the little girl again. She was completely in love already. It was unlike anything she had ever felt before. _

_"Yeah, it's a little overwhelming. I've never felt like this before."_

_Martha laughed softly. "I was mostly scared out of my mind. I would look down at that little face and wonder what the hell I was doing. Whether I was doing a good job or not."_

_"Oh, I don't think you did such a bad job, Mother," Rick said, waltzing in with a huge bouquet of flowers and what seemed like a hundred balloons. "I turned out pretty well."_

_"Yes, well, you turned out better than expected," the older woman conceded dryly, a smile playing on her lips._

_He feigned indignation and shook his head. "Good to know you had faith in me, Mother. And in your parenting skills."_

_"Well, I tried."_

_"And did a fine job, Martha," Kate said. She turned towards her husband. "Hi, Daddy."_

_His smile softened, every expression growing gentle. "Hey." He pressed a kiss against his wife's cheek and lips. "How are my two girls?" He turned his attention to his baby girl, brushing a finger over her tiny fist. _

_"We're doing very well."_

___"That's good," he murmured, eyes on the little person in Kate's arms. Lizzy's eyes opened, sleepy and searching for the familiar voices, her little mouth opening and closing. "Hey Sweet Pea, hey baby girl." He touched his lips to the top of her head, to her cheek. "I love you." He cut his eyes to Kate._

___"Mommy and Daddy love you."_

[][][]

She found him standing in front of his office window, seemingly absorbed by the glow of the city lights. Kate walked up to her husband and wrapped her arms around his waist from behind, planting a kiss against his shoulder blade. They stood in silence for a few moments.

"I thought you were writing."

He sighed and turned around, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her against him.

"I got distracted," he answered on a laugh.

"By the lights?"

He shook his head. "No. Just couldn't stop thinking."

Kate turned to look at him. He was handsome; the strong line of his jaw, the slight stubble dusted over his cheeks and chin, the bright, blue of his eyes. So very, very handsome. Even after all these years, he could still make her heart beat faster, he could still get her off kilter.

She cleared her throat. "About what?"

A smile tugged at his lips, his eyes shifting to her. Kate. His wife. Beautiful in her floral summer dress, standing barefoot beside him, watching the city lights after putting their daughter to bed.

"You. Us. Our family."

She nodded and pursed her lips, the smile twinkling in her eyes and growing on her mouth.

"What about our family?" Her voice was a low rumble, moving like velvet, seeping fire into his veins and igniting the pounding of his heart.

So sexy.

"Just how much I love our family," he simply answered.

Kate turned to face him, a smile slowly parting her lips, affection dancing in her eyes. He cupped her cheek, his thumb dragging along the skin of her chin and jaw; his head lowering towards her.

"How much I love having a family with you."

[][][]

_A perfect day is everyday I'm spending my life with you_

_I can't explain how I fall in love with everything that you do_

_God sure must like me more than I ever knew_

_Cause I could never ask for more from love and life than you_

* * *

**A/N: Well, uh, I hope that was enjoyable. It was very difficult for me to get this chapter done. I ascribe it to a major case of writer's block. I hope it was at least worth reading.**

**Please review and tell me what ya'll think. Any suggestions for chapters are also welcome. **

**Title and lyrics at the end is from the sweet (mushy) Trading Yesterday song, "Nothing but love".**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**


	44. Chapter 44

**A/N: So, this kinda just popped into my head today and I just had to get it out. I hope you enjoy it. And thank you for the wonderful response to the previous chapter - it warms my heart.**

**Disclaimer: In Marlow we trust. **

**P.S. How adorable was Stanathan at the Paley Fest? Seriously. They are making it really difficult for this fandom _not_ to ship them**

* * *

**Chapter 44 - Wherever you will go**

"Esposito, cover me," Kate whispered harshly, jaw set and eyes glittering with intensity. Their three suspects were spread all over the darkened room. They went to arrest one suspect – a known drug dealer – at his apartment and found his two cronies with him. A chase had ensued and now they were stuck in a warehouse with three most probably high scumbags ready to shoot a cop or cops.

Her heart was pounding fiercely against her chest, reverberating throughout her body and pumping adrenaline through her veins. She could see suspect number one and two from her position, hiding behind a set of metal containers. One was looking straight ahead and did not notice her advance. The other one was bent around one side of the container, his attention focused on the other side of the room.

She crept up slowly, her lips pursed in concentration, the sweat trickling slowly trickling down her neck, her vest feeling too tight with every breath she took. Kate made a quick and quiet advance on the targets, Esposito providing cover while Ryan closed in on from the opposite side. They were cornered. Her only concern was that she couldn't see suspect number three. He must be lurking with the-

Esposito shouting "Beckett!" and gunfire was the last thing she heard, suddenly lying on the ground, her head feeling thick and a dull ache quickly turning into a painful throbbing. Her eyes slipped shut and everything turned black, pulling her under into darkness.

[][][]

_Warm. She felt warm. She tried to move away from the heat clinging to her back, burning over her legs. But she couldn't move away, something was holding her. Kate's eyes fluttered open, the early-morning sunlight painting the room – a strange room, her muddled mind supplied – in pale light. Her eyes slipped shut again, her mind slow to react. Her eyes snapped open when she felt his breath whoosh over her cheek in a sleepy sigh. Then she remembered – a large smile cracking open over her face, joy lighting up her face. She turned her head slightly to look at the man that she surprised late last night. The man she flew around the world for, the man to whom she professed her love a few hours ago, the man who carried her heart in his._

_He was adorable with his face relaxed in sleep, his mouth slightly open and hair sticking up in every direction. Her smile widened at the sight of him. Her lover. Lover._

_Wow. _

_Well, he was very definitely her lover now. Twice already. _

_Kate carefully turned in his arms to look at him. She tracked her eyes over his face, darting from the scar on his forehead down to his closed eyes, his nose and his delicious, wonderful mouth. She lifted a hand and gently brushed back the bangs falling over his forehead, dancing her fingers over his temple, over his cheek and down to his jaw, lightly scratching the stubble there. Before she could help herself, she leaned in and peppered his jaw and chin with soft, butterfly kisses; her heart flowing out into the gesture._

"_I'm dreaming, aren't I?" _

_Kate jerked back and let out a surprised laugh. Rick's eyes were still closed, his mouth quirking. She smiled and leaned in again, her mouth hovering over his, a hand against his chest, feeling his steady heartbeat. _

"_Open your eyes," she whispered, her tone soft, eyes affectionate. He immediately opened his eyes, blinking a few times against the invading light before locking onto hers. They stared at each other for a moment._

"_Hi," he said gruffly, his voice a combination of sleep and disbelieving joy._

_Kate's mouth opened up into a large smile. "Hi," she murmured. _

"_You're here," he said. "You're really here." Apparently he didn't have a filter after just waking up._

_She let out a soft chuckle. "I am." She bit her lip, shifting closer, her nose brushing against his cheek. "And I love you, Rick," she murmured before pressing her lips to his. They kissed slowly, languidly for a few moments. _

"_Definitely dreaming," he said, dropping his forehead against hers. One of his hands brushed piece of hair behind her ear, his thumb caressing the soft skin of her cheek. _

_Her mouth twisted into a teasing smirk, her hand on his chest slowly, purposefully moving downward and disappearing beneath the stark white sheets._

"_Oh, yeah?" _

_He groaned and dropped his head onto her collarbone, half of his body already draped over her. Rick pressed his lips to her jaw, lightly sucking at the skin before moving to her mouth._

_He pushed himself up and positioned his body over her smaller one, flames of arousal setting his body on fire._

"_I love you," he said roughly before descending on her mouth in a hot, passionate kiss. She parted her lips and moaned into his mouth, her body arching into his and legs falling open. He pulled back for a moment just to watch her face, to see the naked emotion on her face. The love that was mapped out all over her body. _

_Her love for him. _

_What he saw left him breathless, his chest feeling tight. He dipped his head again, his mouth at her ear, hands moving down to her thigh, lifting her leg over his waist._

"_God, I love you so much."_

[][][]

When she regained consciousness, she could hear his voice. His frantic, angry voice. Kate sighed, her eyes still closed. Her head was pounding. Kate opened her eyes and started to sit up, suddenly feeling dizzy. Finally, she got into a seating position and realized she was in an ambulance and that her husband was outside somewhere having a very animated conversation with someone. She lifted a hand to her head and felt the bandage and touched the back of her head where the injury was, wincing.

It was time to get up.

"Why didn't you call back-up?" Rick was seething, his face hard, hands on his hips. He was seriously getting sick of receiving a phone call from one of the boys telling him that his wife got injured somehow. It _never_ got easier.

He was busy writing – Lizzy sleeping in her little bed next to his desk – when he got the call. He nearly dropped his laptop when he sprang up in panic. Luckily, this time he listened to everything Ryan was saying before bolting out the door to ask Mrs. Thomson from downstairs to look after Lizzy while he went to get Kate.

Ryan sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "We did, Castle. But what we're we suppose to do? Just let them get away."

Rick sighed, his anger deflating a little. "No. No, of course not. I- I'm sorry, Kevin. I just…" He pursed his lips, his eyes stinging. "I don't really enjoy getting these calls, you know?" He said with a lopsided smile.

The detective returned a tired smile. "Yeah and believe me, we don't like making them either."

The ambulance door suddenly swung open with Kate stumbling out unsteadily.

"Kate," Rick said rushing over to her.

She looked up, her eyes glassy and a little unfocused. "Oh, hey handsome," she tried to joke feebly. She could see the worry etched onto his features.

"You should be lying down, super cop," he said softly, steadying her.

"I'm-"

"-If you're going to say fine, I'm seriously going to lose it, Kate," he snapped, his voice turning hard.

Her eyes cut to his in surprise and she could see it in his eyes. He was scared and angry.

Oh, Rick.

She sighed and lifted a hand to his chest, fiddling with his collar. "I'm sorry."

He drew her closer and pressed a lingering kiss against her forehead.

"Let's just get you home."

[][][]

"I dreamed about us," she said, sinking further into their bed while her husband removed her shoes.

He glanced at her, a smile curling at his mouth. "Oh, yeah?"

"Mm-hmm." She felt sluggish, unable to keep up with her thoughts.

"What did you dream about, Kate?"

She sighed and smiled widely. "Our first morning together."

"Good memories," he murmured, urging her to sit up.

"Very good memories," she agreed. He removed her shirt. "Are you trying to feel me up, Mr. Castle?" She teased once he finally removed the item of clothing.

Usually he would retort with some witty or dirty innuendo, but not this time. He stayed silent, his jaw clenched and his eyes looking down. Kate frowned as she regarded her husband.

"Rick." She touched his face.

He lifted his eyes to hers, watching her for a moment. Battered and bruised. He brushed a hand over her cheek gently.

"This is getting old fast, Kate," he said softly on an exhale. She opened her mouth to say something, but was stopped by two of his fingers against her lips. "I thought when I heard Ryan tonight… I thought that he was calling to tell me that this was it. This was how our story ended." He swallowed past the lump; her eyes starting to well up. "Me alone and broken. And…" He hesitated, his eyes locked onto her face. "-my daughters motherless."

She sucked in a breath, the words cutting to straight to her heart.

"Rick," she breathed, wrapping her arms around him. "Oh, God. Don't. Please don't say that," she said, her voice cracking with emotion.

He pulled her tightly against him, pressing a kiss in her hair. He could've lost her tonight. The thought left him desperate and aching.

"Don't ever leave me, Kate. Please don't leave me," he choked out, crushing her against his chest.

After a moment, Kate pulled away and cradled his face in between her hands, stroking his jaw.

"I'm right here. Right here, love." Tears were trailing over her cheeks, his despair breaking her heart. "I'm not going anywhere anytime soon."

He nodded and covered her hands with his larger ones. "I know, I know."

He kissed her, hard and demanding.

They broke apart, panting. Rick pressed his forehead against hers. "You better not go anywhere, Mrs. Castle."

She touched his cheek with her lips. "You're not getting rid of me anytime soon, Mr. Castle."

"Good." He wrapped his arms around her.

"I want my daughter," Kate said softly after a while.

He pulled back and smiled, brushed a fingers over her cheek. He gave her another quick kiss.

"I'll go get her."

[][][]

"_You're pregnant," he said quietly for about the fiftieth time that afternoon._

_Kate laughed. "Yes, I think we established that, Castle." _

_He glanced up at her from his position currently at her stomach, one of his hands tenderly rubbing over her still-flat abdomen. They were lying in bed after thoroughly celebrating the good news. Luckily, no one was home – Alexis wisely choosing to spend the rest of the afternoon with her friends._

"_It's just so awesome. A little person – our little person – is growing in here." He pressed a kiss against her stomach. Her heart fluttered at the gesture. _

_Sweet, adorable man. She adored him. Just completely loved this goofball of a man._

"_You make me sound like some incubator," she grumbled without any real bite. _

_He lifted his eyes to hers and grinned. "Well, technically you are," he retorted with a shrug._

_Kate rolled eyes._

"_But a really, really sexy one," he continued, moving up towards her again. _

"_Oh, trying to charm me again, aren't you, Mr. Castle?"_

_His grin widened as he hovered over her. "Is it working, Mrs. Castle?"_

_She lifted her leg and wrapped it around his calf, rubbing her foot against his leg._

"_What do you think?"_

[][][]

Lizzy was fast asleep against her father's chest, a little hand fisted in the fabric of his shirt; her mouth slightly open. Kate sat up when Rick dropped a knee onto their bed to carefully place their daughter next to her mother.

"Hey baby girl," Kate murmured once Lizzy was beside her. She brushed a hand over the little girl's soft, dark curls and lied down next to her daughter. Kate kissed her softly on the cheek and forehead, Lizzy letting out a sleepy sigh and curling closer to her mother.

Kate also moved closer, her body enclosing protectively around the little girl.

Rick got in behind her, wrapping an arm around his wife's waist. She immediately searched for his hand, pulling it up to her mouth for a delicate brush of her lips.

She let out a shaky sigh, her fingers squeezing her husband's and her eyes on her daughter.

"I love you."

_[][][]_

_If I could, then I would_

_I'll go wherever you will go_

_Way up high or down low_

_I'll go wherever you will go_

* * *

**A/N: I really enjoyed writing this, especially the flashbacks. I hope you enjoyed reading it as well.**

** Title and lyrics are from the beautiful The Calling song "Wherever you will go".**

**Please review and tell me what you think.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**


	45. Chapter 45

**A/N: Another small gift to you. I just couldn't get this out of my head; this chapter directly follows from the previous one. Thank you by the way for all the wonderful reviews. I have a few days off the coming week, so hopefully I will update again soon.**

**Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: They don't belong to me and I'm content with that knowledge now. They are in the safe, capable hands of Mr. Marlowe.**

* * *

**Chapter 45 - Fear**

He stared at the page with unseeing eyes while the cursor blinked mockingly. It was 2am and he couldn't sleep anymore. So, rather than waking Kate and Lizzy with his tossing and turning, Rick got up, burning with the need to get everything he felt and feared out onto the page. Only problem was that he didn't have any words to express himself with.

No paint for the canvas so to speak.

His mind was unable to weave the sentences together because he kept hearing Ryan's quiet and solemn voice. He closed his eyes and fisted his hands, jaw stiffening at the memory. Rick rubbed a hand over his face and sighed. He just needed to get over it. Soon. It's not like he can follow Kate around anymore or ask her _just_ to do paper or do the unthinkable thing like quitting. No. No, he doesn't want that. He never wants to ask her to do that.

_But._

But what if-

"Rick?"

His head jerked up at her soft, weary voice. She was leaning against the door frame, arms folded, watching her husband closely.

He started to get up. "Hey, do you need something?" He asked, brow furrowed in concern.

She shook her head and waved him off, walking over to him.

"I'm fine. Just woke up and realized my husband had gone AWOL," she said, a smile ghosting over her lips.

He sat back down and huffed out a soft laugh, scrubbing a hand tiredly over his face. "Sorry, I couldn't sleep anymore." He frowned. "Lizzy?"

"I put her back in her bed," Kate replied, sliding into his lap, her arms winding around his neck. "Wanna tell me what's going on in that head of yours, Castle?" She asked quietly, brushing a hand through his hair.

He exhaled and dropped his head to her collarbone, placing a kiss to the exposed skin there.

"Nothing. Just couldn't sleep anymore."

"You're lying," she murmured, still brushing a hand through his hair. He sighed again and lifted his head to look at her.

He pursed his lips. "I keep hearing Ryan's voice. . . Keep hearing him telling me that you were hurt."

Her hand stilled, eyes locked onto his. They were bleeding with vulnerability, leaking out all of his worst fears. She sucked in a breath, not fully realizing how much it truly affected him.

"Oh, baby." She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him closely. "I'm sorry," she breathed into his ear.

"Not your fault, Kate," he murmured hoarsely, brushing a hand down her back.

She pulled back. "I don't want you to worry like this."

He returned a sad, lopsided grin and shook his head. "I'm always going to worry about you."

He pulled her closer and pressed his mouth to hers, no intention of deepening the kiss. His wife, however, had other ideas. Kate pulled him closer, prying his mouth open and slipping her tongue in between his lips, stroking the roof of his mouth. Before he knew it, she was straddling him and turning him into a mess of hormones and lust.

When she started pulling at his shirt, he broke away slightly, panting and heady with arousal.

"Kate, your head," he said, his tone gruff.

She sat back, eyes dark and eyebrows lifted. "Castle, your wife is sitting in your lap, horny as hell and willing to screw you senseless in this chair or any other surface for that matter. So, tell me again why we are not doing that right now?"

He swallowed, his body rebelling against his sensible mind. "I- I... just your head, Kate. I don't want to hurt you."

She softened, eyes tenderly regarding him as she leaned in to brush her mouth against his.

"I'm not going to break, Rick," she whispered before sitting back and slowly starting to remove her shirt. He gripped her hips tightly, blood sizzling in his veins while his eyes remained transfixed on the nimble fingers teasingly undoing each button to reveal more skin and that oh-so-sexy, navy blue, lacy bra. After a few moments, the blue button-down fell to the floor.

His eyes stayed glued to her chest.

"Like what you see, Mr. Castle?" She asked, laughter in her voice. When he returned his gaze to her face, her saw the playful glint in her eyes.

He wrapped his arms around her possessively and roughly pulled her against him, chest to chest.

"You have no idea."

She smirked, lower lip caught in between her lips as she quickly rotated her hips on top of his lap. Rick moaned and dropped his head to her shoulder, arms squeezing her tightly.

She sucked on his earlobe, her voice velvety, smokey and oozing sex.

"Oh, I think I get the gist of it."

[][][]

_She was furious. Absolutely livid because the man was a complete and utter idiot. Kate stalked up and down the small examination room, unable to look at what the doctor was doing._

_Finally, she came to a stop. "Castle, what the hell were you thinking?" _

_The man in question let out a sigh as the young doctor - probably an intern, his mind supplied - stitched up the nasty cut close to his hairline. His cheek was bruised and his lip busted. Luckily, no black eye._

_"I wasn't really thinking."_

_She snorted. "No shit, Sherlock."_

_He cut his eyes to hers, suddenly blazing with anger. "Well, I'm sorry for not wanting you to get pummeled by a three hundred pound criminal, Kate."_

_"So, you got pummeled instead," she pointed out flatly. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Castle, I'm the cop here. I was trained for this. You-"_

_"-Yeah, I know," he interrupted hotly. "I'm not a cop. I just have to standby and watch, right?" _

_Kate's jaw stiffened at that and she took a breath, inhaling and exhaling slowly. Calm, calm, calm. Before she could say anything, the young doctor smiled and peeled off her gloves._

_"Well, there you go. All done," she said brightly as if being deaf to the rather personal conversation she had been privy to. "Now remember, don't get these wet. They will come out in a week or two's time."_

_Rick smiled tightly. "Thank you, doctor."_

_"No problem," she said with a wink. Kate wanted to roll her eyes. "Good luck." With that she was out the door._

_The two remaining occupants stared at each other._

_"Rick-"_

_"Don't worry, Kate, n____ext time I'll just sit on the sidelines." He got up from the bed, pulled on his jacket and started walking towards the door. "After all, I'm just a useless writer," he said bitterly, brushing past her._

___She grabbed his arm and yanked him back before he could get any further. He could feel in her grip that she was a little angry. _

___Or more like pissed._

___"That's bullshit and you know it! This isn't a damn pity party for your ego, Castle." She pushed him away from the door and invaded his personal space. "This is your life we're talking about here. And you were pretty damn reckless out there today." She pursed her lips, eyes hard on his. "You weren't being my partner, you were trying to be a hero."_

___Rick stared at her, mouth opening and closing. He had no counter-argument, no rebuttal because, well, she was spot-on. He_ did___ try to be the hero. _

___He let out a breath and dropped his head into his hand. "I'm sorry."_

___Kate immediately wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her face into his neck. "Just. . . just don't scare me like that again. Okay?"_

___He wrapped his arms around her and let out a soft laugh. "I'll try not to." He pulled back slightly to frame her face within his large hands. "Only if you do the same."_

___Her mouth slid open into a smile, tongue caught in between her teeth. "I'll do my best, Rick."_

[][][]

"Do you have to go in tomorrow?"

She sighed. "No. Montgomery gave me a few days," Kate mumbled sleepily, her head pillowed on his chest. They were sprawled out on the office couch with only a thin fleece blanket and body heat keeping them warm.

"Good," he murmured, continuing to trace hypnotizing patterns with his fingers on the bare skin of her shoulder.

"What time is it?" She asked, her eyes already closed.

He brushed a hand through her hair and smiled. "Don't know. I guess around three."

"Mmm."

There was silence for a few moments, the only sounds their breathing. Rick was wide-awake, his body still buzzing and mind alert. Kate, on the other hand, was fading fast.

"Kate?" No answer.

He jostled her lightly.

"Nah-uh," she whined sleepily, sounding like a petulant child. He had to bite his lip not to laugh.

"Kate, honey, come on." He sat up with her still in his arms. "Let's go to bed." She blinked a few times and yawned widely, a hand covering her mouth, her eyes a little dull and hair tousled.

Rick cocked his head, wearing a soft smile while sliding a hand through the long tresses draped over her shoulders.

"You're adorable."

"I was going for sexy actually." She go up and started to gather her clothing off the floor with her husband openly ogling her.

"Well, that too of course," he replied with a grin, getting to his feet.

She grinned, pulling his t-shirt over her head. "Smooth talker," she murmured, pushing past him, clad in only her panties and his shirt.

He gently grabbed hold of her wrist, pulling her to him and kissing her softly.

"Thank you."

She lifted an eyebrow, lips pursed in an effort to hold the amusement from spilling out. "For what? The sex?"

He barked out a laugh and rolled his eyes. Jeez, her mind was constantly in the gutter these days.

"No. Even though I am truly thankful for it." Rick wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. "Just thank you. . . for coming after me."

Her face softened, mouth lifting into a smile while she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Anytime partner."

_Always._

_[][][]_

_When we were children we'd play_

_In the streets just dipped in fate_

_When we were children we'd say_

_That we don't knowing the meaning of fear_

_Fear, fear, fear_

_Fear, fear, fear_

_We don't know the meaning of_

* * *

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed that. I will write more about Lizzy in the coming chapters. I just couldn't resist the sexy Caskett-appeal. **

**Please review and tell me what you think. Suggestions/prompts are also welcome.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title and lyrics at the end are from the OneRepublic song, "Fear".**


	46. Chapter 46

**A/N: Yeah, yeah, I promised an update like last week. Sorry. That just didn't pan out. My apologies. **

**Moving on.**

**I've been waiting to write the next few chapters around this theme - Rick and Kate's first official date. It might span two more chapters. I will definitely give you more Lizzy, but after watching 47 seconds and my heart being in pieces at the end of that, I just needed (like most of us) some Casketty goodness. (Btw - the crazy stalker woman is still out there; so I am going to bring her in sometime again).**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: If they were mine, they would have been married already with a second baby on the way. Just sayin'.**

* * *

**Chapter 46 – Accidentally in Love**

The door slipped shut and for a moment, Kate rested against it, tired and drained. She sighed and pushed off the wooden surface, turning around. She pulled off her red pea-coat and slung it over a nearby chair while dropping her purse and keys into a bowl on the small, metallic table near the door. The loft was immersed in darkness, only a lamp or two and the fire in the fireplace providing light.

"Hey, beautiful."

"Holy shit!" She jerked around at the sound of his voice, clutching a hand to her chest. "Castle, you scared the crap out of me," she breathed, her shoulders slumping in relief.

He pushed off the door-frame of his office door, a smile pulling at his mouth.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."

He was dressed in black dress pants and an indigo button-down shirt, shaved and hair groomed to perfection.

Debonair and delicious.

Her eyes slowly, eagerly raked over him as he approached her.

"It's a pity."

Her brow furrowed, the hazy lust clearing from her thoughts.

"What is?"

"That we couldn't do date night tonight."

He slid his arms around her loosely and pulled her to him.

She sighed and melted into him.

"Oh. Yeah. I'm sorry, honey." Kate wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her hands clasped behind his neck. "Things got a little crazy today and I had a load of paperwork to wrap up."

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "It's okay. I understand. Besides, I'm used to it by now."

She pulled back, narrowing her eyes. "Used to what?"

He sighed. "Getting stood up by beautiful women."

Kate rolled her eyes. "Shut up." She pulled his head down towards her, stealing his breath with a toe-curling kiss.

When they broke apart, Rick regarded her with a lopsided grin. "So? Was I right? Did the husband do the deed?"

Kate sighed and shook her head. "No, the husband alibied out actually."

His cocky grin fell away. "No way! I was sure it was him."

Kate smiled faintly. "Yeah, so were we." She brushed her hands over his shoulders.

"So, who was it?" He asked, a spark of interest igniting the blue hue of his eyes.

"The mistress."

He snorted in derision. "Let me guess - he promised her the stars and the moon and she didn't want to share him anymore."

Kate nodded. "Yeah, pretty much."

"So she went all 'Fatal Attraction'."

She nodded again and smiled. "Yeah, pretty much."

"So cliche."

"Not all murder cases are murder mystery novels, Castle. Sometimes it's simply a case of Jack-shot-Jill-over-Bill."

"Still. _Sooo_ boring."

Kate rolled her eyes and shook her head, deciding to change the subject. "So? What did you have planned for date night, Mr. Castle?"

"Something awesome, Mrs. Castle." He gave her that sexy, devilish little upturn of his lips; all twinkly eyes and roguish charm.

Damn.

The man was hot as hell.

And, as a result, she was always in trouble controlling herself around him. _Serious_ trouble.

Kate lifted an eyebrow, her mouth curving. "Awesome, huh?"

He grinned and pulled her closer, lowering his head towards her. "You have no idea," he murmured against her cheek, pressing a kiss to her skin. "I would have knocked your socks off."

"Only my socks?"

Rick barked out a laugh. "Among other things."

She hummed in agreement before pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Kate pulled back, a smile sliding open over her mouth. "Just like that first date, huh?"

He huffed in indignation, his mouth quirking. "You're never going to let me live that down, are you?"

She shook her head, lip caught between her teeth. "Nope. Not anytime soon, Casanova."

"Yeah, yeah. Okay," he grumbled. "We almost didn't get out of your apartment, remember?"

She laughed lightly and nodded. "Oh, yeah. I remember." She rolled her eyes. "God, we were like two horny teenagers."

"We still are." He sighed. "That was the best part of the evening. The rest... was a disaster. To put it mildly."

She shrugged. "Eh, it wasn't so bad."

He snorted in disbelief. "Oh come on, Kate! It was bad. Really, _really_ bad. You can't deny that."

She grinned, wide and beautiful, sparkling and adoring. She rose up to meet his mouth in a soft, delicate kiss.

"It was the best worst-first-date I've ever been on."

[][][]

_He was strangely nervous standing at front her door, dressed in his best Armani suit and a bouquet of her favourite flowers in hand. Tonight was their official first date - and he wanted it to be perfect. He wanted to wine and dine and spoil her. _

_Rick took a breath, lifted his hand, knocked three times and waited. His heart hammered in his chest and his palms felt sweaty. He tried to shake it off. They were together already. They have been since she followed him to Rome two weeks ago. But they were back in New York, back in the real world, back to being Castle and Beckett. _

_So, yeah, he was a nervous wreck because-_

_because... she was it for him. _

_Kate Beckett was his last chapter, the epilogue to his life. And he didn't want to mess-_

_The door opened and his heart stuttered to a halt. _

_Kate was wearing an elegant, strapless, black cocktail dress that was cut off just below her knees along with sexy, black four-inch, peep-toe heels. The dress fit like a glove - sensuously hugging her curves, mapping the contours of her lithe body. Her hair was pinned up, a few strands hanging loose and curling against around her face, revealing the long column of her neck. _

_He was staring._

_She bit her lip, eyes traveling all over him - he was swoon-worthy in a tailored, black designer suit (the man had serious taste) and a rich, maroon button-down shirt._

_She wanted to the one wearing that shirt by the next morning. But they had a deal - five dates. _

_Five. Dates. _

_Ug. So not a good idea._

_"Hey," Kate said quietly, her mouth curving into a soft, shy smile. _

___He cleared his throat and returned a lopsided, slightly goofy smile. "Hi." _

_Silence fell for a few seconds. _

___Kate pressed her lips together in an attempt not to smile. "Are those for me, Castle?" She pointed to the flowers._

_"Uh," he glanced at the flowers and back to her. "Yeah. Here you go," he said, holding the flowers out to her rather dumbly. She grinned, watching him from beneath her eyelashes._

_Adorable, sweet man._

_"Thanks," she said, her face showered in tenderness and affection. She closed her eyes and inhaled the sweet scent of the flowers. "Come in while I put these in water."_

_He followed her towards the kitchen, eyes glued to the sashay of her hips in that very, very sexy dress._

_He wanted to be the one to drag that zipper down and pull that dress off her body. But, alas, they made a deal - five dates before sleeping together again. It was stupid idea now in hindsight. Very stupid. How was he supposed to keep his libido in check with her in _that _dress? _

___He moved in behind her, his hands finding her waist. "You're beautiful," he murmured, his mouth at her ear while his hands rubbed slowly, seductively over the soft skin of her shoulders. Kate's hands faltered for a moment and she instinctively leaned back into him; his rich, dark voice drawing her in._

_Like a moth to the flame._

___"You're not so bad yourself, Rick," she breathed, her voice throaty and dark._

___He pressed against the counter and placed a few kisses against her shoulder before tracking open-mouthed kisses towards her neck, darting his tongue out to taste her skin. Kate closed her eyes and bit back a moan, her hands flexing against the surface of the counter. If they didn't stop this soon, they were not getting out of her apartment tonight. Especially not when his hands were traveling over her sides - up and down and down and down and oh!-_

___She quickly turned in his arms and put a hand to his chest, trying to get some distance between them. He was staring at her, eyes dark and hungry. She swallowed, licking her lips. She saw the way his eyes darted towards her mouth, predatory in his perusal. He stepped into her personal space, his hips pressing her back against the counter again while his hands gripped her waist tightly. _

___"God, you're sexy," he growled hotly before crashing his mouth onto hers. He roughly thrust his tongue into her mouth - demanding and possessive and so very, very good. _

___He broke the kiss to suck on her pulse point again, his hands all over her body._

___"Rick. Wait." Her voice was a little shaky and breathless. She had to resist the urge to wrap a leg around his hip and just take him. On the kitchen counter. Fondling and moaning and-_

_No, no. Slow. They had an agreement._

_Slooowww._

___She shook her head to clear her mind of the hot, dirty things she was thinking about doing to him on that very surface._

___"Rick," she said stronger this time, pushing on his shoulder. He took a step back, chest heaving and eyes clouded with lust. "We... Our agreement," she finished weakly on a sigh._

___He groaned and tilted his head backwards, taking a step way from her. In that dress. All sexed up. At the kitchen counter._

___Ah, shit. _

___"That was the stupidest idea we've ever had," he muttered before returning his gaze to hers._

___She grinned and took his hand, palms kissing and fingers interwoven. _

___"Come on, Castle. You promised me, and I quote, 'a night to remember'."_

[][][]

He chuckled, leaning against the headboard, dressed in a pair of boxers and a white t-shirt. "Oh man, I thought I was gonna knock you off your feet."

He heard her soft, amused laugh. She poked her head around the open bathroom door, toothbrush in hand and grinning widely.

"I can still remember your face when that concierge told you about the mix-up. You almost looked like you were going to have a panic attack." She disappeared out of sight again.

He sat up. "I almost did!"

A few minutes later, she emerged from the bathroom with a bottle of lotion, smiling widely. "But why?"

His brow furrowed, the bed dipping with her sleight weight. "What do you mean 'why'?"

She glanced at him while rubbing lotion on her legs. "Why were you so nervous?"

His eyes were on her hands. Rubbing lotion. On her long, _long_ legs. In those boy shorts.

"It was our first date," he said quietly, shifting closer to his wife while reaching out a hand and smoothing it over her bare thigh.

She stopped and watched him, the tone of his voice halting the movement of her hands.

"You wanted to impress me," Kate stated. She lifted a hand and brushed it through his hair, lightly scratching his scalp. He let out a contented sigh and slid down to lie beside her; his head next to her hip and an arm slung over her waist.

He shrugged, eyes fluttering. "Yeah, I guess so."

She laughed softly, still running a hand through his hair. "Why?"

He shifted to look at her. "I wanted to give you everything you needed. All of the things that you deserved."

Her heart pounded, her chest suddenly feeling tight at the naked sincerity radiating from his eyes. Her mouth slowly, beautifully soared into a beaming smile. She brushed her fingers along his temple, down over his cheek and along his jaw, the sweep of her thumb meeting his lips.

"Rick, by that time, you already gave me everything that I've ever wanted." She scooted down to meet him and painted a gentle kiss to the canvass of his mouth. "And so much more."

[][][]

_Come on, Come on_

_Move a little closer _

_Come on, Come on_

_I want to hear you whisper_

_Come on, Come on _

_Settle down inside my love_

* * *

**A/N: In the next chapter, we'll be seeing more of that 'official first date' - remember in my story, they are already together by that stage because it occurs after Rome (where Kate confessed how she felt). Anyway, I hope it was enjoyable. I still have a lot of ideas for this story; I just need time to get them all out onto a page!**

**Review and tell me what you think!**

**Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews already.**

**Title and lyrics - Counting Crow's, 'Accidentally in love'.**


	47. Chapter 47

**A/n: Ye****ah, uh, I... yeah, sorry. The muse and I have been having some difficulties and, well, there just hasn't been any time for me to work on my fics. But anyway, here is the second chapter in the first-date-storyline with flashbacks.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Andrew Marlowe is the master because he's giving us Caskett. . . against a door. 'Nough said.**

**Just give a moment to fangirl because 'Always' is LESS THAN A DAY AWAY! Ashslkdjhopjgakhfjfdljflj! Freaking out like a boss!**

**Alright, carry on with your day like normal people. . .**

* * *

**Chapter 47 - I've got this friend**

"_What do you mean there's been a mix-up?" _

"_I'm sorry, Mr. Castle, but there's been a double booking. The other couple has already been seated."_

_Rick rubbed his forehead and clenched his teeth. "You have got to be kidding me," he muttered. He looked up at the very indifferent concierge. "Isn't there another table open somewhere?" He asked in a lowered tone – he didn't want Kate to know about the mix-up. It was embarrassing enough already. _

_The man sighed, already bored of the conversation. "No, unfortunately not, Sir."_

_Rick pursed his lips, turned around without another word and made his way back to Kate. A very beautiful Kate in her black dress and sex-on-legs shoes. All dressed up for nothing it seemed. _

_Great. _

_But when Rick caught her eye, her face lit up with a large, beaming smile. His heart jumped a little at the sight. She was just too damn beautiful. _

"_So, what's going on?" _

"_Uh, bad news. They mixed up our reservation," he finished with a wince._

_"Oh. Well that sucks."_

_He sighed. "I'm sorry, Kate. I wanted this to be special-"_

_She quickly pressed a kiss to his mouth to cut him off. When he stared at her in (adorable) dazed confusion, she only shrugged and quirked her lips into a small smile._

_"__Come on, Castle. I know a little place not far from here."_

_Folding her small hand into his, she led him out the door._

[][][]

"We should go there again sometime."

She hummed in agreement and moved closer, snuggling into his side. "Maybe we should go for our anniversary," Kate muttered tiredly, her eyelashes brushing against the skin of his neck.

He nodded and pressed a kiss in her hair. "I'll make us a reservation."

Kate huffed out a laugh, her eyes closed. "Hopefully they won't get it mixed up." Her tone grew softer. "And hopefully I won't stand you up next time."

He sighed and pulled his arm tighter around her. "Don't worry, babe, we'll get our date night one way or another." She waited for it. "A man can only go so long without sex."

Of course.

Kate rolled her eyes and lifted her head, lips curving against her will.

"Castle, it's been three days since we've had sex. I think you'll survive."

"Mmm, you'd think so. But no, it doesn't seem possible," he replied casually.

"Oh come one! We've gone _way_ longer without sex."

He groaned. "Don't remind me. Hellish days. Complete and utter torture."

"Shut up, drama queen" she said, resting her head down onto his chest, legs tangling with his.

"Hey!"

She ignored his feigned indignation. "You're not getting any tonight by the way. I'm too tired."

He laughed softly and lowered his head to kiss her forehead awkwardly.

"You're here now and that's all I need. All I want."

She sighed, melting further into him, already drifting to sleep.

"Mm, love you too."

He encased her closer to his body, in his warmth, his hands rubbing soothing circles on her back while his mind drifted back to that first date again.

[][][]

_This wasn't what he had planned. _

_The resturaunt was a small, intimate and plain Italian bistro. Not what Rick Castle had in mind for an impressive first date. But Kate Beckett was giving him that flirty little Mona Lisa smile where she coyly bit her lip. _

_And it drove him crazy. M__ade him forget all about the rude, insulting bastard who crashed into him on the sidewalk and the over-friendly Casanova of a waiter who tried to charm his girlfriend._

_"So? What do you think?" Her voice was soft, dancing to across to him in a dark, intimate tone._

_He smiled and glanced around. "It's. . . nice."_

_She rose an eyebrow, her mouth twitching in amusement. "But?"_

_ He huffed out a laugh, shaking his head. "But, uh, not what I had planned though," he answered with a shrug. His eyes locked with hers, his expression growing serious. "I... God, Kate, I want this to be unforgettable."_

_She would have teased him for being a sap if it wasn't for his sincerity, for the way his eyes bored into hers._

_She curled her fingers around his hand. "Well, let's make this unforgettable then, Castle."_

[][][]

"Rick?" Her rough, sleepy voice snapped him out of the recollection.

He glanced down and smiled, his hand combing through her hair. "Yeah?"

She was adorable while rubbing her eyes sleepily, her brow furrowed and her hair falling messily around her face.

"Can you get the light, please?"

He pressed a kiss against her forehead. "Sure babe."

She growled in annoyance at the moniker and turned on her side, her back to him. He chuckled and flicked the light switch before scooting down to spoon his wife, his arm wrapping her tightly against him. Kate immediately slipped her cold feet beneath his, burrowing further into his enveloping warmth with a drowsy sigh. They laid in silence for a while, drifting in between sleep and consciousness.

"What were you thinking about?"

He grinned, his eyes already closed. "Just about how stupid I felt when you had to pay for dinner on our fist date."

She laughed softly, her small hand wrapping around his larger one at her waist.

"Well, it worked out okay, didn't it? I mean, I'm stuck with you for the rest of my life."

He pouted. "Hey! As I can recall, you were a very willing participant in all of this, Mrs. Castle."

She grinned. "Mm, I was," Kate murmured. "I even agreed to a second date despite the fact that the first one was - by any man's standards - a complete and utter disaster."

Rick groaned and dropped his head to her shoulder, nuzzling her neck. "Don't remind me."

She laughed. "You brought it up, Castle."

"Mm," he sighed. The laid in silence, darkness melting them into the mattress. "Remember how we got soaked in the rain?"

[][][]

_He felt like an idiot. The biggest idiot on the planet. He was standing by the door like some kicked puppy. Without a wallet._

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. _

_He checked his pockets again for about the fifth time. Still nothing. Rick sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. Yeah, he was convinced now that the guy who so rudely crashed into him on the sidewalk had stolen his friggin' wallet. The guy might as well taken his balls for that matter because his date had to pay the bill. On their first date. _

_Sheesh. It_ doesn't_ get any worse than this. __But seriously, if he found the guy who stole his wallet, he was going-_

_A slender hand curling around his elbow interrupted his murderous thoughts. Rick turned towards Kate, apology already sliding off his tongue._

_"Kate, I'm so sorry-"_

_She pressed two fingers against his mouth, smiling softly. "Rick, it isn't your fault. Someone stole your wallet. It happens." She removed her hand from his mouth and hooked her arm through his, a hand at his bicep as they walked out. "Besides, I'm not some some stranger that you need to prove yourself to. It's me."  
_

_"Exactly." His expression was solemn, a little defeated. Kate couldn't help but find it utterly adorable. "This was suppose to be. . . the perfect date."_

_Oh, Castle._

_She smiled, biting her lip, eyes sparkling as she stepped closer to him, a hand on his chest._

_"Will a kiss make you feel better?"_

_His lips quirked, despite the pout. "I guess," he mumbled with a shrug._

_Her smile grew as she feather her lips across his cheek. "How about two then?" _

_"Better make it good, Detective. My ego is heavily bruised," he murmured, his mouth lifting into a grin._

_Kate cupped the back of his neck and slanted her lips across his, slipping her tongue inside his warm, wet mouth. She took ownership of his every thought, his every sense. Rick gripped her waist, tugging her closer while sucking on her bottom lip, nibbling lightly; his body enclosing hers. After a few moments, they were startled apart by a honking taxi cab._

_Kate dropped her head to his shoulder, laughing breathlessly. She lifted her head, a wide smile parting her mouth._

_"Feel better, Castle?"_

_"Infinitely better, Beckett," he replied with a grin before dropping a kiss to her forehead. _

_"Good, I'm glad." She pressed a kiss to his jaw._

_"Come on, I feel like walking." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her tightly against his body as they made they're way down a Central Park pathway. _

_The night air was cool and after ten minutes of walking contently, wrapped up in one another, rain drops started to fall. Rick tipped his head upward to look at the sky, now dark with pregnant rain clouds while Kate pulled his jacket tighter around her shoulders. _

_"Oh, no, no, no. Not good." __After a few moments, the rain started to fall steadily. _

_"Come on, Castle! Let's get out of here," Kate exclaimed with a laugh, dragging him by the hand. They ran laughing hysterically in the midst of getting soaked in order to find some sort of shelter or at least a cab. At one point, Kate twisted her ankle and stumbled before Rick caught her by the arm._

_"You okay?" _

_She laughed breathlessly, her dripping-wet hair clinging to her face. "Yeah, I'm fine."_

_Eventually they made it to the sidewalk where they were able to (miraculously) wave down a cab almost immediately. Rick was convinced that it was because of the hot woman standing next to him. _

_"Oh, thank God," Kate breathed once they got inside. Rick got in and squashed in next to her, giving the cab driver her apartment address._

_He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer. "Remind me next time to never suggest walking again in an impending rain storm."_

_"Well, it was kinda romantic," Kate murmured, her head on his shoulder._

_Rick snorted. "Yeah, just as romantic as our reservation being mixed up and the fact that I couldn't pay for dinner."_

_She lifted her head. "Castle, shut up and kiss me. You may still be able to salvage something if you do."_

_He stared at her in suprised amusement before kissing her softly, delicately; her lips cool and moist against his. He brushed a hand over her cheek, her skin chilled and wet. _

_"Kate, you're freezing."_

_She smiled softly, brushing a hand through his wet hair. "Says the one with the soaked shirt."_

_"Wanna warm me up," he muttered with a sly grin._

_Her smile widened, her tongue in between her teeth. "Five dates, Castle. Five dates."_

_He groaned and dropped his head. "Yeah. Remind me again why we are doing that to ourselves?" _

_After ten minutes of stolen kisses, wandering hands and whispered words, the cab came to a stop in front of her apartment building._

_She turned to him with a small, shy smile. "Come up for coffee," she offered before gesturing to his wet shirt and pants. "And to dry off."_

_He nodded. "Yeah. Sure."_

_They paid the cab driver and stepped out, but once Kate hit the floor of the sidewalk she grimaced in pain and grabbed onto Rick's arm._

_"What's wrong?" _

_"My ankle. I must have twisted it earlier."_

_Rick sighed and wrapped an arm around her as they made their way into the apartment building. "Come on, let's get you home."_

[][][]

He felt a pair of lips against the back of his neck, the rush of air tickling his skin.

"Castle." Her voice was soft in his ear.

"Mm," he murmured, his eyes still closed, completely unwilling to wake up yet.

Kate kissed his cheek, half of her body draped over his back. "Honey, wake up."

"Nah-uh. 'S not time yet."

Ugh. She was always up way too early for his liking.

"It's nine, Rick."

"So?" He mumbled petulantly, clutching the pillow closer.

She laughed lightly, musically; the sound hitting him in the guts. "Come on. I've got a surprise for you," she whispered in his ear, her hands skimming over his sides ready to tickle him into consciousness if needed.

He turned his head slightly, one eye popping open. "A surprise?"

Such a child.

Kate kissed his cheek again and got off him. "Yeah, come on. Sit up."

He sat up and rubbed his eyes, still adorably sleepy. "Wait. It's not hot morning sex?"

She barked out a laugh. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Castle," she threw over her shoulder as she disappeared out the room for a moment.

"I would have liked hot morning sex by the way!" He called after her before throwing off the covers and getting up. His knees and back popped audibly. It wasn't age, just the cool morning air. Of course.

She reappeared with a large tray filled with coffee, muffins, pancakes, bacon and scrambled eggs. He looked at her in amazement, stepping to take the tray from his wife and placing it on the bed.

"Kate, what's the occasion?" His face grew pale. "Oh shit, please don't tell me I forgot our anniversary or-"

She laughed, sitting down on the bed. "No, no. Don't worry, nothing like that."

He let out a relieved breath. "Okay." His brow furrowed. "So, what-"

"Jeez, Castle, can't a wife just make her husband breakfast in bed if she feels like it?" She snapped in mild irritation.

"Uh, sorry. It's just a nice surprise," he replied, sitting down next to her. He caught her eye and grinned.

Her mouth lifted into a smile. "As nice as hot morning sex?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "Can't compare the two, but this is great. Thank you, babe." He pressed a swift kiss against her mouth, a hand cradling her jaw. Before he could let go, Kate wrapped her hand around his wrist, her eyes tender and her features bathed in gentleness.

"Thank you."

He tilted his head, brow furrowing in confusion. "For what, Kate?"

She shifted closer and bit her lip, her knee pressing against his thigh. Her eyes found his again, painted with seas of affection.

"For loving me. For taking care of me."

He cupped her face and kissed her, pouring his heart into the press of his lips and the slide of his tongue against hers.

"Oh, God. Kate, always. _Always."_

[][][]

_"How's that?"_

_She pressed her lips together in an effort not to smile. Sweet, sweet man. Infuriatingly sweet._

_"Castle, I'm fine. It's just a sprained ankle." He adjusted the cushion her injured foot was resting on and placed the ice pack on her swollen ankle._

_"Yeah, but it's really swollen-"_

_Oh, seriously. _

_"Rick, come here," she commanded softly, holding out a hand. _

_He got up from the coffee table and sank down next to her, enfolding his large hand around her smaller one. Kate snuggled into his side, her head on his shoulder. He dropped a kiss on top of her head._

_"You warm enough?"_

_"Mm-hmm," she replied, fiddling with the hem of the white undershirt he had on. His button-down was in the tumble dryer. She lifted her head. "You?"_

_"I'm hot," he replied with a grin. Kate rolled her eyes, trying, but failed to keep the smile pulling at her lips. There was no denying his hotness. They sat in content silence for a few moments before Rick spoke again. _

_"So, I guess inviting me up for coffee and snuggling and making out means there's gonna be a second date, right?"_

_Kate turned her head to look at him. "Yeah, I guess so. . . Casanova."_

_He grinned. "Even though this one was a disaster."_

_She nodded and smiled. "Even though this one was a disaster."_

_He leaned in, nudging his nose with hers. "Well then, here's to the worst first date ever." _

_She let out a giggle, her lips a whisper away from his. "The best one I've ever had."_

[][][]

_Slowly counting down the days_

_Till I finally know your name_

_Ooh, the way your hand feels round my waist_

_The way you laugh_

_The way your kisses taste_

* * *

**A/N: I really struggled to get this chapter out, but it's here now - finally! And I hope it's enjoyable. The semester is coming to an end, so hopefully I will have more time to write and fill the harrowing hiatus with some Castkett-family fluff.**_  
_

**Please review! And thank you for everyone who already have - I means a lot.**

**Title: 'I've got this friend' (The Civil Wars)**

**Lyrics at the end: 'To whom it may concern' (The Civil Wars)**


	48. Chapter 48

**A/N: The muse and I are working through some issues, hence my infrequent updates. Hopefully, relaxation and rest will get us unto the same page again. This chapter will, like always, feature Casketty goodness and in addition to that, I'm bringing back the crazy stalker lady. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I'm still not over 'Always' and I'll probably never will be thanks to our genius showrunner. Andrew Marlowe, I love you and your brilliant brain and beautiful characters. Always. **

* * *

**Chapter 48 - Nikki Heat**

"Hey, babe."

"Hey," she greeted distractedly, eyes focused on the paperwork in front of her. "What's up?"

"So I dropped Lizzy off at day care and I'm now on my way to my first radio interview."

"Oh, okay. Thanks, honey." Slowly, a smile parted her lips. "By the way, I'll be listening to that interview," Kate murmured, the smile melting into her voice. She was so proud of her talented husband.

Rick laughed softly. "Oh, Mrs. Castle, I know you will." His voice dropped. "You're my biggest fan, remember?"

She hummed in agreement, absently twirling a strand of hair; paperwork momentarily forgotten.

"Indeed I am, Mr. Castle," she said, smiling widely. "I think I proved that last night. Twice." She caught Esposito's mirth-filled gaze as he mouthed _'get a room'_. She shot him a glare and turned her back on her colleagues.

They were really like irritating younger brothers sometimes.

"So, how late is the reading tonight?"

He sighed on the other end of the line. "Six or seven. Around that time. I'm not entirely sure, but I'll let you know."

"Barnes and Noble on the corner of Lexington and 37th, right?"

"Yeah, something like that," he answered distractedly; she could hear Paula shrill, loud voice in the background. He sighed. "Listen, honey, I have to go. I'll text you the time later, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Go, Castle. Go do your job." She smiled. "I'll see you later."

He grinned. "Okay, can't wait. Bye. I love you."

She smiled. "Love you too." She sighed, still smiling like an idiot, and put the phone down.

"What _adorable _thing did Castle do now that has gotten you all starry-eyed, Beckett?" Esposito asked, flopping down in the writer's designated chair and interrupting her thoughts. She narrowed her eyes at him. He only returned a smug grin.

Ryan stepped in, smirking. "Yeah, did he buy you flowers?" His grin grew wider. "Or, oh I know, he got you a present, didn't he?"

Oh, they wanted to make her feel uncomfortable. Amateurs. Bring it on, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb.

Kate raised an eyebrow, her lips curling upward. "You're right, Ryan. He gave me something just last night," she replied casually, leaning back in her chair, arms outstretched above her head. Her lips curved slyly, eyes sparkling. _"All _night long." The grins slowly started to fade from the other two detectives' faces as they realised in which direction she was going. "It was long and hard-"

Esposito abruptly stood up. "Okay, I don't need to know that." He looked mildly disgusted.

"What?" Kate asked with a shrug.

Ryan wore the same disturbed expression. "Yeah, I really don't want to hear anything about. . . _that,"_ he finished awkwardly.

"What's wrong guys?" She glanced between them, the picture of innocence. "I'm just telling you that my husband and I enjoy a very healthy-"

Esposito stuck two fingers in his ears. "Lalalalalala!"

"Truce! Truce!" Ryan exclaimed as the two men hastily retreated back to their own desks. She could hear them mutter something along the lines of _"Mom and Dad"_ and _"scarred forever"_.

Kate grinned victoriously. They could dish it out, but not take it.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," she called out. She received two mutinous glares in return. And to just rub it in, she added:

"That paperwork is not going to finish itself, boys."

[][][]

She checked her watch, growing impatient with how slow the minutes were ticking by. Only a few minutes before he was going to make his appearance. She took a breath, trying to keep it together, to keep from jumping up and down with excitement. She was finally going to meet him and he was finally going to see what he has been missing all this time.

She adjusted her narrow, form-hugging pencil skirt and popped another button on her already revealing white blouse. She was going for the Nikki Heat-look - even dyeing her hair dark brown (he seemed to prefer brunettes) and wearing impossibly high heels. She looked a little slutty. But anything to get his attention.

_Anything._

All of a sudden, the crowd (of mostly women) burst into loud cheers and squeals. She quickly whipped around to see him walk in, smiling broadly and waving. He looked _good. _So very, very handsome in that suit and maroon shirt.

He was just so beautiful.

"Rick! Rick!" She couldn't help it; she joined the other fans who were yelling his name and waving like crazy. Surely, he would know her. He just had to.

She was his soul mate.

She was so focused on the handsome writer that she didn't notice the striking brunette hovering close by until someone behind her exclaimed:

"Hey, it's Nikki Heat!"

[][][]

Kate sat off to side - next to Paula, who was still busy ordering people around - and watched her husband being his charming self. She usually didn't attend book readings and signings, but he had almost begged her to come.

Just this once. _'How cool would it be if the real Nikki Heat was there?'_

She relented because a) he was adorable when he got excited and b) well, because she wanted to see him in action, so to speak. And he was just so good at it - he had the audience eating out of the palm of his hand while he read the first chapter of _Burning Heat_. He just enchanted everyone with the low rumble of his voice, drawing them into the story.

It also didn't hurt that he was so very sexy in that tailored black suit and maroon button-up shirt; groomed to perfection.

Such a delicious catch. And all hers.

Once he was done with the reading and the audience was told that 'Mr. Castle will be back in a few minutes to for the book-signing', he immediately went to his wife. She grinned at him and got up.

"Good evening, Mrs. Castle," he greeted with an impish smile before pressing a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth.

"Good to see you too, Mr. Castle." Kate bit her lip, her smile widening.

He wrapped his hand around hers. "Where's Lizzy?"

"Oh, I called Sarah to babysit. It was just too cold to bring her out-" she glanced around the room "-and frankly, you never know who's gonna be here."

"Ah, I get it. You don't want to expose our daughter to potentially deranged fans."

She grinned. "Yeah, something like that."

He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand, running it over her wedding ring.

"How long are you staying?"

She glanced at her watch. "I told Sarah that I would be back by eight. So another hour?"

He smiled and nodded. "Okay. But, you're gonna sit next to me while I'm signing books. I want my fans to meet the real Nikki Heat."

[][][]

She was having trouble breathing. He wasn't looking at her, he was not going to notice her at all because-

Because of that bitch.

He was constantly glancing over at her, smiling like a fool and proudly introducing her to everyone as the 'real Nikki Heat'.

God, how could he be so blind?

She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, willing the tears away. She was _not_ going to cry. She had to pull herself together - all was not lost. She just had to do something to make him notice her. With that idea she opened her eyes and saw that she was only about five people away from the love of her life.

But that whore was laughing with him and touching him like she had a right to do so. How was she going to get his attention away from that woman?

_'What if I just grabbed and kissed him?' _

[][][]

"Wow, it's so great meeting both of you. Best. Night. Ever!" A bright-eyed young woman exclaimed with a beaming grin as she clutched the book to her chest.

"Thank you for coming out," Rick said in greeting as the girl walked off, pleased and excited.

Kate smiled widely. "Bye."

She was actually enjoying this - meeting the fans, talking about Rick's books. She was a fan herself, after all. It was really, really nice.

"Hi there," Rick said to another fan; by now, probably the eightieth one. She looked up and saw the woman who seemingly only had eyes for her husband. All love-eyeballs over him.

She looked strangely. . . familiar.

"Hi," the woman said in greeting, her voice low and sultry as she still stared at the writer. She slowly slid her copy of _Burning Heat_ in front of Rick.

"So, to who am I making this out?"

"To Nikki," she replied, licking her bright-red lips.

Of course.

She was going for the Nikki Heat-look - cop by day, stripper by night. A little slutty. She was definitely pulling off the 'little slutty'-part in Kate's book.

Rick looked up and grinned. "Oh, like Nikki Heat."

'Nikki's' mouth curved up into a slow, sly smile. "Exactly."

He glanced at Kate, oblivious to the woman's attentions. "Well, meet the real Nikki Heat," he introduced Kate with a beaming smile.

The woman, however, steadfastly ignored Kate and kept her eyes on Rick. It was getting a little weird. And, frankly, the detective didn't like the way she was looking at her husband.

Like she was mentally undressing him.

The woman bent down slightly, placing her hands flat on the table; effectively putting her _assets_ right in line with Rick's eyes.

Kate shifted in her seat, feeling uncomfortable. She stuck out her hand, hoping to distract 'Nikki'.

"Hey, nice to meet you. I'm Detective Kate Beckett."

'Nikki' just smiled tightly, throwing the detective a hostile look; not bothering to shake her hand.

"I know who you are," she said before returning her attention back to Rick.

O-kay.

"I just enjoy your books so much, Rick," she purred.

He looked back at her and smiled politely. "Well, it's always nice to hear that people enjoy my work." He kept his eyes on her face because her chest was practically in his face.

"You're really, _really_ talented," she hummed, flicking her eyes to his mouth. He was used to come-ons from fans, but not when his wife was sitting right next to him.

This chick had some _gigantic_ balls.

"Uh, thank you." He smiled tightly, locking eyes with her. "Well, here you go." He handed the book to her. "And thank you for coming out. I appreciate it."

"Anything for you, Rick," she breathed. Suddenly, before any of them knew what was happening, 'Nikki' swooped down and crashed her mouth onto his, grabbing a hold of his face. Rick jerked back in surprise, almost falling out of his chair in the process.

"What the hell!" Kate shot up out of her seat and forcefully pushed the woman away, stepping in front of her husband. In a flash, security appeared and grabbed the very clearly disturbed woman.

"No, wait! Rick! I love you! I _love_ you!" She screamed as they dragged her out of the building while everyone stared on in shock. They announced a break in the proceedings so that things could just settle down. And to give them time to reinforce security.

Paula, Rick and Kate retreated to the back of the bookstore to catch their breaths and regroup.

"Holy shit," was all the writer could get out, still wiping his mouth.

Paula stepped closer. "God, Ricky, I'm sorry. That never should have-"

Kate was bristling with anger, arms folded across her chest. "Paula, just do your job and get more security," she barked at the stunned book agent. She was furious - what if the crazy bitch had a knife or something?

If she just had her gun. . .

The book agent just nodded, seeing the murderous look in the detective's eyes. "Yeah, yeah. On it."

After a moment, Rick spoke. "Kate."

She glanced at her husband, looking like he was about to beg for her forgiveness. She was angry, but not at him. It wasn't his fault that he had some psychopaths for fans.

"Are you okay, Castle?"

His brow furrowed, still a little shocked. "Yeah, I'm fine." He paused for a moment. "You?"

She bobbed her head. "Yeah. But she should count herself lucky that I didn't bring my gun."

His face fell even further. "Kate, I'm so sorry-"

She grabbed his hand. "It's okay. It's not your fault." Her lips lifted slightly into a wry smile. "You've got some deranged fans, Castle."

He laughed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I told you so."

"Occupational hazard, I suppose."

He let out a sigh before pulling her in for a hug. "Yeah, but still. Jeez, did she have to try that with you sitting right next to me? I mean, you're my wife, Kate. My _wife,_ for god's sake."

Her mouth twitched into a smile at his indignation as she pressed her face into his neck.

Mm, he smelled so good.

She lifted her head. "Yeah, well, she must be crazy." Kate glanced at her watch. "It's eight, Castle. I have to get home and you still have to finish up here."

He groaned and tightened his hold on her, burying his face in her neck. "I don't want to anymore. I wanna go home with you."

She was quiet for a while, just playing with the hair at the back of his head. "You have to, Rick," she said softly eventually. He lifted his head to look at her, frowning. He was basically just molested by a crazy fan (in front of his wife) and she wanted him to continue?

She glanced down at her hands now on his chest. When she returned her eyes to his, they were gleaming with tears.

"There might be someone out there who needs this." His brow furrowed even further. "Just like I did," she murmured, her voice fragile.

Oh.

Oh, Kate.

Just like she did. She also stood in line to get her book signed just after. . . her mother died. She told him that. He didn't remember their first meeting - much to his dismay - but apparently, it meant a lot to her. He helped drag her out of the rabbit hole, she told him.

He could feel his eyes starting to burn as he thought about a young Kate Beckett standing in line, desperately grabbing at straws, a little lost and broken. A lonely girl carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. His heart broke a little at the image. If he just knew back then.

He suddenly felt fiercely protective of her, this beautiful, strong woman in front of him. His wife. She was still that lonely girl sometimes. Not a lot anymore, but she still tended to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders on occasion.

Rick briefly closed his eyes and nodded. "Okay." He pulled her closer and pressed a kiss against her forehead, just keeping her in the cradle of his arms. "Okay, I'll do it," he answered hoarsely.

She smiled, still a little teary. "Good. I'll see you at home, okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I'll bring ice-cream," he said with a grin, before growing serious again. "Kate, I'm sorry-"

She silenced him with a kiss; hot and devastating and a little rough. They broke away panting, her face pressed against his collarbone.

Finally she looked at him again. "Don't be. It wasn't your fault, remember? Besides-" Her mouth converted into a slow, cunning grin, like a predator playing with her prey; her eyes dark and dangerous."-_I'm_ still your biggest fan, Mr. Castle."

[][][]

Oh god, she has never been so humiliated in her life. She slammed shut the door and sagged against it, finally giving in to the tears, the disappointment, the utter heartbreak. Why didn't he do something to stop it? Why didn't he chase after her? Didn't he love-?

No. No, no, no.

He _did_ love her. He told her that. It was everywhere in his books. He loved her - she could see it in the way that he was looking at her, the way that he kissed her. He just couldn't express it like she could tonight. She lifted her head, her tears already drying.

He couldn't express his love to her because-

Because of that stupid bitch. She was ruining _everything._ Finally, she got up and made her way to the shrine. She lit a few candles and took the newly signed novel out of her bag, placing it carefully with the others.

She stared at the gigantic Richard Castle poster. "I love you," she whispered, tracing a hand slowly, reverently over his smiling face, lingering at his lips.

She placed her other hand on her own mouth, feeling giddy as the memory of his lips on hers. He was such a good kisser. She had no idea.

"Don't worry, I will always love you and we _will_ be together soon." She pressed her cheek against the poster. "It's just a matter of time."

She just needed to get Kate Beckett out of the picture.

* * *

**A/N: Wow, I'm even creeped out by this crazy stalker chick. This chapter was a real challenge - the muse and I struggled quite a bit, but finally, I just sat down and wrote and it got me through. The tone is a little different - obviously - and again there was no Lizzy. I promise, there will be in the next few - I wanted to end it off here; it's a bit of a cliffhanger, and frankly, I don't want to writer another coming-home-scene. Of course, this plot is not going come up in every chapter, but it's gonna be there beneath the surface.**

**Anyway, I hope it was enjoyable. Please review and tell me what you think.**

**I apologize for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**


	49. Chapter 49

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who has been reading, reviewing and alerting this story and for being patient with me. I truly appreciate it - you are great! **

**This chapter has a bit of everything - Caskett fluff and Lizzy and flahsbacks. It's much lighter and a lot less crazy than the last chapter. The crazy stalker woman is not in this one, although, she will be returning sometime in the future.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Marlowe, I'm still not over 'Always'. Thank you for creating a perfect show. **

* * *

**Chapter 49 – Dance me to the end of love**

The sun was rapidly sliding in behind the horizon, beneath the curtain of ocean waters; the sky painted in hues of pink and orange while the late afternoon rays of light cut through the gathering clouds. It was a perfect summer's evening, the ideal weather for Labour Day weekend.

"Ah, don't you just love the Hamptons?" Rick turned to his wife with a large smile before closing the trunk of their SUV.

Kate grinned as she let Lizzy wriggle down onto the ground; the little girl immediately scampering off while her parents followed closely behind, bags in hand.

"_That_ and long weekends," Kate said, bumping his shoulder with hers and curling a hand around his bicep.

"Oh, careful , Sweet Pea." Rick laughed and protectively grabbed a hold of his baby girl's arm as she attempted to unsteadily climb the few steps leading up to the front door. The little girl squealed and babbled, trying to break out of her father's hold.

She was a stubborn little thing.

The fifteen-month old was by now walking everywhere; quick, determined little steps with her chest puffed out and arms swinging like she was on a mission. However, she didn't like it when her mother or father attempted to assist her, already showing a wilful independence.

"Back-chatting already, huh?" Kate commented dryly.

"Like mother, like daughter," Rick muttered as he unlocked the front door of their beach house.

Kate rolled her eyes, her mouth twitching. "I heard that, Castle." She scooped their daughter up.

"Still true."

"Yeah, yeah." She turned towards her husband, a sly smile splitting her lips. "Don't forget that I was quite the rebel too." Her brow furrowed in mock concentration. "And as I can recall, you were quite the hell-raiser as well. Ergo. . ."

The cocky grin quickly fell off his face. "Don't say things like that to me, Kate. I'm the father of two daughters."

The lanky brunette laughed at his solemn expression, Lizzy still bouncing in her arms. "Well, don't worry, Castle, Alexis turned out fine and this one-" she nodded towards their daughter before letting her down. "-will probably take after her sensible mother."

He dropped the bags in the foyer before approaching them. "Oh, really? The one who bought a Harley soft-tail and who dated a grunge rocker?" He grinned, but then quickly sobered. "Wait. That's not a good thing."

Kate smirked, her eyes sparkling. "Don't forget – he also smelled like cigarettes."

"Oh, God, no." He was by now picturing his little girl – age sixteen – partying with some rocker old enough to buy alcohol.

Damn writer's imagination.

"Don't worry, Castle, I'm a cop. I can run background checks-"

"And you have a gun."

She laughed, trekking behind their fast-moving daughter. "And I have a gun."

"I'm still buying a shotgun, though. Just in case," he said, his expression serious, his eyes a little frantic. Kate glanced at her husband and burst out laughing, the sound of her amusement ringing throughout the house.

She stepped closer to him and stroked his cheek. "Oh honey, that's sweet and adorable." She wound her arms around his neck. "But why don't you stop thinking about what a difficult teenager our daughter might be – God forbid – and start thinking about what you want to do now." A sly smile curved her lips. "Or what bikini you would like to see me in."

His wide eyes snapped to hers, his jaw growing a little slack. "The red one," he answered immediately, a little breathless.

_So easy._

Kate grinned and pressed a kiss to his mouth. "Red one it is then." She stepped away from him and went after Lizzy, who was butt-up underneath the coffee table. She had a thing for crawling underneath tables.

"Come on, Sweet Pea, let's get your swimsuit on." She threw her husband a dirty, salacious grin. "Daddy wants to go swimming."

Rick groaned and dropped his head, his mind flooded with images of his wife in a tiny red bikini.

"You're killing me here, Kate!"

She only returned a throaty, delighted and completely evil laugh.

He would never, _ever_ win this game. He didn't mind, though, because every time he lost, it felt like winning.

[][][]

_He quietly closed the break room door and watched her for a moment. She was so very sexy in her tight, dark skinny jeans, four-inch stilettos and white button-up shirt._

_She turned towards him and smiled, her whole face lighting up. "Oh, hey."_

"_Hey," he said quietly, leaning against the wall, still staring at her. In those tight, figure-hugging jeans._

_He swallowed thickly and started to recite baseball scores in his head._

_Rick Castle had a major problem: his wife (wife!) was way too hot for her own good and it was painfully, rousingly distracting most of the time. It wouldn't be a problem if they were still on their honeymoon, but, alas, all good things had to come to an end. Unfortunately, it also seemed that Rick's control over his libido had also come to an end. He was like a sixteen year old boy again. With a wife who could this thing with ice cubes. _

_He was never going to look at ice cubes quite the same again._

_Kate turned her attention back to the espresso machine, utterly oblivious to her husband's rather pervy attentions._

"_So, Espo and Ryan canvassed the area for witnesses and-" A spoon fell to the ground and she bent down to pick it up. Yeah - painfully, rousingly distracting. "-they found a potential witness. They're bringing her in now." She was still completely unaware at how he was staring at her._

_In three long strides he was right beside her, his expression a little dark and his pupils dilated. He looked like a predator about ready to pounce on his prey._

"_Kate, what are you trying to do to me?"_

_She whipped her head towards him, stunned and incredulous and thoroughly confused. _

_"Excuse me?" _

_He moved closer, backing her up against the counter. "You heard me." _

_Her gaze jumped from his eyes to his mouth, lingering there for a few seconds, her eyes growing dark and stormy._

"_W-what are you talking about?"_

_He gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes, pushing her even further back against the counter._

"_Why are you wearing these pants?" Rick growled into her ear, his hand ghosting over the outside of her thigh. "Or this blouse?" He moved his hand up to finger a few of the buttons. "Or these shoes, Kate?" He pressed an open-mouth kiss just below her ear, tasting her skin. Kate shuddered and instinctively grabbed a fistful of his shirt._

_Oh man, if anyone caught them now._

"_W-what do you mean?" She stuttered, her voice shaky and hoarse._

_Ah, he had her now._

_He grinned against the skin of her cheek, scraping his teeth against the strong line of her jaw. He could feel her shiver right into his bones. _

"_It's to drive me completely crazy, isn't it?" She sucked in a breath, her hips canting forward out of their own volition._

"_Don't flatter yourself, Castle," she shot back, but it was nothing more than a breathless huff._

_He aggressively slammed his pelvis against hers, making her gasp. "Oh, really?" His hands moved to her hips; his grip possessive, hard and bruising. "What about the lacy red bra and matching panties you're wearing?" He hovered over her mouth, his lips like mist on her hers._

"_I watched you get dressed this morning, Kate." He skimmed his lips over hers, ever-so-softly. "And you _know_ how I feel about sexy lingerie. What it does to me." His face was inches from hers, his expression thundering with arousal. "Especially when you're in it."_

_Kate's mouth slowly curved into a cunning, feline smile that sent every last drop of his blood rushing south. _

"_Oh, I think I know just how you feel." She slammed her hips into his and rotated them quickly, catching him by surprise. She always managed to do that. Rick grunted and dropped his head forward, his face buried in her hair. _

_She gently nibbled on his earlobe and laved it with her tongue. "And to answer your question – yes, it is to drive you completely crazy." She placed a few soft kisses against his jaw, a hand on his other cheek. "You wanna know why?" She whispered and he immediately drew back to meet her gaze. _

"_No," he answered gruffly. _

_Her mouth quirked, but instead of finding lust and heat and sex, he suddenly found tenderness and affection instead. Her lips slid open into an exultant mile and she gently touched his face, caressing the strong line of his jaw with her fingers. _

"_Because _you_ drive _me_ completely crazy, Rick." She shrugged, her smile now morphing into a cute, shy curl of the lips. "I'm just returning the favour."_

_He laughed, a low rumble of amusement. "Well then, Detective, by all means do continue." He moved in again to brush one, two kisses against her mouth. "Isn't there a deserted supply closet here somewhere?" Rick murmured, half-teasing and completely serious._

_She laughed and pulled back. "You can have me when we get home, Writer Boy." His face fell immediately. She patted his cheek and eventually moved out of his arms. "But until then, we have a murder to solve." _

_He let out a heavy sigh. "Spoilsport."_

_She paused at the break room door, tossing him a smug smirk. _

"_Oh and Castle? You know how I like my coffee."_

[][][]

She wanted to do some reading. She really did, but by now, the book was just lying open against her thighs, totally forgotten.

The reason?

Her completely distracting husband. Luckily, the sunglasses provided the perfect cover for shamelessly checking him out.

The play of muscle under the tanned skin of his shoulders; the solid, hard shape of his arms; his broad, firm chest-

"I know you're checking me out, perv."

Kate startled at his voice and let out a surprised laugh. "What?"

Rick turned his attention to his wife, a large, knowing smirk unfolding over his features, amusement flooding his eyes. He was busy building sandcastles with his little girl who was just happy just to sit by and grab fists full of sand and occasionally fling it around with cackles and kicks of delight. She was wearing a red-and-white polka dot one-piece swimsuit, complete with ruffles. She was also dressed in a large sunhat, a pair of pink sunglasses and smeared white with sun block.

He gestured towards the book. "You haven't turned a page in five minutes."

Kate dropped her head and grinned, biting on her lower lip. She closed the paperback and unfolded her long legs, leaning forward in the chair. The movement was proving to be quite distracting to the writer. _She_ was quite distracting.

"How do you know I'm not checking out those hunky hotties behind you?"

Rick turned around and saw a bunch of young college guys playing touch football. Yeah, they were fit. And hunky. And young.

Big deal.

He turned back to his smirking wife and crawled towards her, planting his hands on either side of the handles of the chair; effectively boxing her in.

His lips flickered upward. "Because, Mrs. Castle, you are madly in love with _me_. And it's _me_ you want," he all but growled.

Kate lifted an eyebrow, her eyes still obscured by the sunglasses. She pressed a foot against his abdomen, her toes digging into the soft skin. "Oh, cocky of you, Mr. Castle," she murmured, trying, but failing to keep the smile off her lips.

"I'll show you cocky," Rick muttered and moved in to brush a kiss against her lovely mouth.

Kate pulled back, still smiling. "Easy tiger. We'll get to that later." She pushed on his shoulders and got up from her seat. "Before that, though, I want to build sandcastles with my daughter."

She sat down next to Lizzy, protected from the blazing sun by the shade of the large beach umbrella. The little girl shrieked and launched herself into her mother's lap. Kate laughed and grabbed her daughter as she fell back onto the beach towel; Lizzy now above her in the air, giggling like crazy and kicking her plump little legs.

"Hey, beautiful girl. You having fun?" Kate let the toddler drop down onto her stomach; the little girl resting against her mother's legs. Rick settled down beside his wife and daughter, watching them with a soft smile.

After a few minutes of tickling and blowing raspberries, Kate finally sat up, still cradling Lizzy against her chest. She picked up the plastic bucket and turned to Rick, her daughter now sitting with her back in the V of Kate's legs, clapping her little hands together and jabbering away.

"Did you do this a lot with Alexis too?" Her voice flowed in soft, tender tones. He smiled and slid closer to his wife, taking up the bright pink bucket and filling it with sand.

They were like two big kids playing in a sandbox.

Rick nodded and let out a chuckle. "Yeah. We came here practically every summer. It was kind of our thing, you know?" He shrugged. "Summer in the Hamptons was our favourite time of the year. Crazy illegal fireworks, camping on the beach, terrifying each other with ghost stories."

His mouth curved into a gentle smile, nostalgia sweeping over his features."She loved that."

"She still does, Rick," Kate commented softly, wrapping a hand around his forearm. He looked at her, his eyes bathed in warmth and affection with a little sadness breaking through. Lizzy waddled in between them, occasionally throwing her arms around.

He sighed and bobbed his head. "Yeah, I know."

Kate leaned in, hooking an arm around his shoulders and pressing a kiss against her husband's cheek. Their daughter quickly made her presence known by clambering all over her parents, seeking their undivided attention. Rick chuckled and scooped up his little girl, planting a smacking kiss on her cheek. She giggled and tried to squirm away from her father. After a while, he fell back still holding his daughter to his chest.

Kate laughed and stroked Lizzy's back, moving over to brush a hand through her husband's hair.

"You remember the first time you brought me here?"

[][][]

_"Welcome to the Hamptons!" He gestured towards his beach house and turned towards her with a large, mega-watt smile. Kate only returned a small smile and heaved her bag out of the trunk of the car._

_"Oh, I got that."_

_She rolled her eyes. "I can carry my own bag, Castle," the detective retorted dryly. _

_"Nonsense, detective. I am gladly at your service." He gave her a mock bow. "Use me however you see fit. With the emphasis on use." He grinned at her and winked as they made their way to the front door. _

_She only returned an enigmatic smile. "We'll see, Writer Boy. Only if you're good."_

_His grin turned into a smug smirk. "Oh, I'm always good. You know that by now."_

_Oh, so cocky. And correct. _

_Kate rolled her eyes, but failed to keep the smile of her face. _

_He opened the door of the mansion and ushered her in, dropping their bags in the foyer. Before she could protest, Rick grabbed her hand and took her on a tour of the house, chatting excitedly. He told her about the history of the house, the interesting previous owners and all of the renovations he had to make to it. Finally, they ended up on the porch in the backyard that led out on to the beach._

_"Wow, it's really, really beautiful, Castle," she said in awe. He smiled, feeling a little proud for being able to help put that expression on her face._

_He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss against her cheek while they looked out onto the beach and infinite stretch of water ahead of them. _

_"Yeah. It is, isn't it? See, I told you that you'd love it." __He turned to her with a quirk of his lips."_You should have joined me the first time I invited you, Detective." 

_Kate stiffened in his arms, her eyes skittering away from his. For some stupid reason, the events of two years ago still hurt, still hung between them. She never told him about that even though they have been together for a little more than six months._

_He noticed the change in her demeanor, the way she tensed. "Kate?" He inquired softly, turning to face her.  
_

_She still didn't meet his eyes, chewing viciously on her lower lip. Before he could ask anything else, she spoke, her voice barely audible. _

_"I was going to say yes." She lifted her eyes, suddenly shimmering in the dusk light. _

_"What?" _

_Kate pressed her lips together. "When you asked me to the Hamptons." He nodded, brow furrowed. "Well, I was going to say yes."_

_He stared at her in shock. "What? I- I don't understand. You told me that you couldn't go because of Demming-"_

_She nodded and smiled sardonically. "Yeah, but then I broke up with him."_

_"You broke up with him? When?" His head was spinning._

_She tried to avoid his gaze. "What does it matter, Rick? It's water under the bridge." However, the lingering traces of sadness and hurt swirling around in her eyes caught his attention._

_He grabbed her hand. "Kate. Please just tell me."_

_She sighed and after a while answered. "I broke up with him that afternoon before your farewell party. Before you left." _

_His face fell. "So you broke up with_ him_ to go away with_ me?"

_She nodded and laughed softly, her eyes stinging. "Yeah, something like that."_

_Rick dropped his head into his hand. "God, I can't believe this." He lifted his head, brow furrowed in confusion. "But why didn't you tell me?"_

_She sighed. "Because before I could tell you how I felt and that I wanted to join you, your ex-wife showed up out of nowhere."_

_He closed his eyes for a moment, the puzzle pieces coming together to form a horrific picture of missed chances. "And then I left with her."_

_Kate sighed, turning to watch the ocean again as she folded her arms. "Yeah, you left with her and didn't call for three months," she responded softly, her tone bleeding vulnerability._

_"Oh, Kate." He wrapped her in a hug, cradling her to his chest. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know."_

_She shook her head. "Like I said, Castle. It's water under the bridge."_

_He framed her face with his hands and feathered light kisses over her cheek, eyes, nose and finally mouth. _

_"I'm so, so sorry," he whispered against her lips. "Kate, I-"_

_She placed two fingers against his mouth to silence him. "It doesn't matter anymore, Rick." Her mouth transformed into a gentle, muted smile as she wound her arms around his neck and pressed her body close to his. "I'm here now and I'm yours."_

_For that declaration, he kissed her like a man possessed. He cradled her head and covered her lips with his, slid his tongue along the crest of her mouth and explored the dark, delicious cave within. _

_Rick had his hands halfway up her shirt when Kate finally broke away, panting. "Why don't we take this inside, huh?" Her lips twisted into a devious, carnal smirk. "I have things planned for you."_

_He grinned, eyes twinkling. "Dirty things?"_

_She bit her lip and crowded him, her mouth brushing his ear. "You have no idea." _

_Kate took his hand and started to lead him towards the door, but he pulled her back for a moment, concerned once again. _

_"Kate, are you-"_

_She cut him off with a tender touch of her lips, her smile painting his mouth with one as well._

_ "I'm perfect and happy and stupidly in love with you." She tugged him towards the door. "Now come on, I want to get to the dirty things."_

[][][]

"I still can't believe I didn't figure it out," Rick murmured. They were lying on the large couch in front of the fireplace. Kate was sandwiched in between her husband and daughter who by now was sleeping soundly, cradled against her mother's chest.

"Yeah, well, how were you suppose to know. I mean it's not like I made myself clear."

He sighed, weaving his hands through her hair. "Still. I should have known something was up when everyone - including the Captain - gave me a cold shoulder when I got back."

Kate craned her neck to look at him. "That was largely because you didn't call for three months."

"I was such an idiot."

She laughed softly. _"We_, Castle. We were such idiots. We should have just owned up to our feelings." Kate glanced down at her sleeping daughter and brushed a hand through the little girl's curly, dark hair.

"I was in love with you by then," he said softly after a few quiet moments.

"Makes two of us," Kate murmured in response. "I knew I felt something, but I didn't want to admit it."

"Makes two of us," Rick sighed and lifted his head to peer at his daughter, brushing a large hand down her small back. Kate was looking at him, affection colouring her gaze.

His eyes found hers and he smiled, bringing his hand up to caress her cheek, her jaw, the outline of her lips with his thumb.

"I love you."

He pursued her mouth with a gentle kiss; promises tattooed in the movement, in the union of their lips.

Kate smiled, her lips converting into a lovely curvature against his mouth.

"I love you too."

_[][][]_

_C'est la vie _

_C'est la mort _

_You and me_

_Forevermore_

_Let's walk down_

_(Let's walk down)_

_Where the road, it has no end_

_(Road has no end)_

_Steal awayWhere only angels tread_

* * *

**A/N: Wow, this got a little sentimental at the end there, but what the heck. I hope it was enjoyable.**

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**Title - from the beautiful Leonard Cohen song of the same name. Lyrics at the end - The Civil Wars, 'C'est la mort'.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**


	50. Chapter 50

**A/N: Thank you so much for all the feedback, I really, truly appreciate it. This one is more of the usual stuff you are used to. This is an idea that I've had for a while now and I want to explore it for the next few chapters. And well, who can't resist sexy Caskett?**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Oh please, like there would be a hiatus if I were the creator of this piece of television perfection... **

* * *

**Chapter 50 – Howlin' For You**

"Oh, God. Oh wow," he slumped back, breathless and chest heaving. "That was just. . ." he was still panting, his mind too muddled to form any coherent sentences. Especially when her lithe, warm, gloriously naked body was still half draped over his.

Early morning sex was the best kind. Particularly when you wake up to open-mouthed kisses traveling down, down, _down_ and eager, groping hands setting every nerve-ending on fire.

Kate lifted her head from his chest and grinned, her cheeks flushed with exertion.

"Amazing?"

Rick chuckled – his heart still racing – and pressed a kiss against her forehead.

"Yeah, something like that," he agreed, brushing a strand of hair off the damp skin of her cheek.

She laid back down and started to absentmindedly trace patterns on his chest with her fingers.

After a while, she broke the silence. "Seems like we're getting better at this each time."

He grinned, happiness and male pride blending to form the smug smile. She never had to fake anything with him - it was all natural ecstasy (and moans of pleasure).

"It's all in the stamina, babe."

She peered at him, an eyebrow lifted and eyes sparkling.

"What about technique, _stud?_" The grinned fell off his face. She lifted up and rested her arms on his chest, her head cushioned on top of them. "It's all about the. . . _thrusting_," she breathed before sucking her bottom lip in between her teeth. His eyes widened slightly. Her voice was rough and throaty, the epitome of a thoroughly sated woman.

"Long... _hard..._ deep-"

Before Kate could finish the sentence, his mouth was on hers, his tongue breaking the seal of her mouth. He always got a little desperate and rough when he was aroused; his hands were fisted in her hair, his kisses were bruising, his body was coiled tightly.

The kiss gentled and after a while they the separated, breathless and hearts thumping. Kate smiled, a soft upturn of her lips and brushed one final kiss against his lips.

"Happy anniversary," she whispered against his mouth.

He grinned. "Happy indeed." He wrapped his arms around her and sighed, brushing a hand down her bare back. After a few moments, he spoke again. "I can't believe I've held this long with you."

Kate's mouth dropped open in a shocked and disbelieving laugh. She slapped his chest. "_You've_ held out with _me?_ Oh, please." She rolled her eyes, mouth quirking. "I've had to put up with a big kid for much longer than this."

He grinned. "Big kid, huh?" Suddenly, he flipped them over and pressed her into the mattress with his body.

"Rick!" She squealed in surprise, a laugh tumbling out of her mouth.

"Nothing childish in my behaviour just a few minutes ago, was there, Detective?" He muttered with a grin, nuzzling her cheek, placing open-mouthed kisses along her jaw.

She laughed, a sexy, low rumble that had him shivering. "No, that was _all_ man," she all but purred, arching her body into his and enjoying the way his eyes grew dark and thunderous.

He covered her body with his, voice scratchy and gruff. "One more round?"

Kate nodded, her eyes by now matching the dark, stormy desire reflected in his. She smiled and wrapped her leg around his hip in encouragement.

"Make it quick, stud."

* * *

[][][]

_He was pouting like a child and she told him so. He just couldn't keep the unhappiness off his face. They should be at a restaurant now or at home enjoying a romantic meal, drinking wine and sharing bites and she should be teasing her foot up his-_

_"Okay, we're ready," Ryan said as he rushed by to his own desk. Rick stay slumped in his chair, still moping._

_Instead, they were at work._

_"Great," he muttered. He finally got up with a heavy sigh and pulled on the tuxedo jacket. It was their anniversary today. Their second damn anniversary. Couldn't they just get a few hours to celebrate two years of marital bliss? Was that too much to-_

_"Mm, looking good, Castle."_

_He whipped around and the air whooshed out of his lungs. He stared at her dumbly, his mouth open and jaw a little slack. She was stunning in a black, strapless evening gown that hugged her waist and hips perfectly before fanning out slightly towards the end. Her hair was pinned up, a few strands framing her face while her long neck was exposed._

_He wanted to touch her. Undress her. But in private; preferably their bedroom. _

_"I... uh... You-" He stuttered, his eyes tripping over her ample curves in the form-fitting, entirely too perfect dress._

_Kate approached the desk and dropped her make-up bag into the desk drawer. Her husband was still staring at her; his eyes traveling up and down her body._

_"Yeah, I know." She smirked before taking his hand, sliding her fingers in between his. "Come on, Writer Boy, we have work to do."_

_"Uh-huh." _

* * *

_Best. Anniversary. Ever. _

_He was like a ninja. No wait, like a spy. A ninja spy. He was being so bad-ass and totally James Bond in the tux and the dry martinis and beautiful woman on his arm-_

_"Castle, focus," Kate hissed, snapping her husband out of his fantastical thoughts. "We need to get this guy tonight. So keep your eyes open."_

_He made a show of flicking his eyes downward. "Oh, my eyes are definitely open, Detective," he murmured, waggling his eyebrows and pulling her closer to him. They were on the dance floor because it provided the best vantage point to look out for their suspect. And well, they were all dressed up already. _

_She sighed and sagged into him a little bit. "Rick, please." His brow furrowed at the resigned tone of her voice._

_He cocked his head. "Hey, you okay?"_

_"Fine." After a moment of silence, she launched into a softly-spoken tirade. "This case is from hell, I'm exhausted, it's my anniversary and instead of having great, hot sex right now, I'm working. So yeah, I'm just friggin' peachy."_

_He stared at her. "Wow. Okay." His lips quirked. "We need to get home soon for that great, hot sex."_

_Kate barked out a laugh, the tension and frustration melting out of her in an instant. "Shut up, Castle," she murmured with a smile, her forehead pressed against his cheek._

_He placed a kiss in her air and rubbed a hand down her partially exposed back. "Come on, Detective. Let's get this bastard so we can get out of here."_

_She lifted her head and smiled at him, her eyes softening. "Okay." The detective quirked an eyebrow and straightened. "Let's get the son of a bitch who's ruining-"_

_"Uh, Kate, I see him," Rick interrupted._

_"Where?"_

_"Right behind you, twelve o'clock."_

_She nodded her head and pressed a finger to the hearing device in her ear. "We have eyes on him, boys."_

_"Roger that, Beckett," Esposito's voice crackled. "We're moving in."_

* * *

_Two hours later, they had their man in custody. He confessed to the crime after only fifteen minutes in the box with the two Castles. _

_Kate sighed, reluctant to pack up and leave the boys to book their suspect and finish the paperwork. _

_"Are you sure? I mean shouldn't I at least-"_

_"Beckett, we've got this," Esposito insisted, basically pushing her towards the elevator. _

_Ryan smiled nodded, his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, you guys get out of here." His smile morphed into a smirk. "I'm sure you'll do the same for me on my anniversary."_

_Rick nodded vigorously, giving both detectives a thumbs up._

_"Thanks guys. We appreciate it." Rick smiled and winked as he guided his wife towards the elevator doors, his hand on the small of her back and her evening gown draped over his other arm._

_When the elevator doors closed, Kate sagged against the wall and closed her eyes; the adrenaline waning off and exhaustion setting in._

_She could feel his presence next to her, his solid warmth pressing against her. "Tired?" He questioned softly, wrapping his hand around hers._

_She hummed. "Yeah, exhausted." Kate opened her eyes and smiled at her husband._ "And_ starving."_

_Rick laughed softly before pressing a kiss against her temple._

_"Remy's?"_

_She pulled back slightly, her mouth softening into a smile. _

_"Sounds perfect."_

_The elevator doors opened and Rick wrapped an arm around her as they stepped out. _

_"Well, it's not a romantic dinner by candlelight."_

_Kate shook her head and burrowed further into his side as they walked leisurely in the cool night air._

_"No, maybe not." She turned to him, coyly twirling a piece of hair around her finger. "But it's us."_

* * *

[][][]

"Castle, get off me," Kate hissed, trying to dislodge herself from her very handsy husband. "You're insatiable."

He was always a little bit more _affectionate _after getting lucky (twice).

They were standing in the kitchen with Rick trying to distract his wife by pressing her against the counter - her back to him - and Kate trying to get to work on time.

He sighed and took a step back, holding up his hands. "Okay, okay. Sorry." His mouth curved into a sly smile. "I just can't help it that my wife is so incredibly hot and irresistible."

Kate laughed as she moved past him to the front door. "Smooth, Casanova."

Secretly, she loved it. And he knew she did.

He followed her, coffee cup in hand. "So, how late are you coming home tonight?"

She threw on her coat, her mouth curving into an affectionate smile. "I'll be on time, Rick. I promise." They had reservations _and_ a baby-sitter. She was _so_ not missing date night.

Especially not on their anniversary.

He took her hand in his for a moment, weaving their fingers together. "Good, because there's gonna be dancing." Rick grinned, waggling his eyebrows.

She loved dancing.

"Really?" Kate's face lit up, her eyes suddenly alive with excitement, her mouth sliding open into a beaming smile.

Her husband found it utterly endearing and adorable. So much so that he had to stop himself from throwing her over his shoulder and carrying her back to bed.

His chuckled, the joy painting his eyes in a bright blue. "Yes, really." He tugged her closer to him. "So, Detective, be ready to put on your dancin' shoes."

He leaned in and brushed a light kiss to her still smiling mouth, drinking in her beautiful happiness. Before he could break away, Kate firmly took hold of his face and deepened the kiss, sliding her tongue over his lower lip and teasing the entrance of his mouth. He could feel her the coolness of her wedding band against his jaw; the searing heat of her mouth against his; the soft curves of her body against the hard planes of his.

"You're gonna be late," Rick murmured against her hair.

She smiled, her forehead against his cheek. "Okay, okay. I'm going," she muttered, still not moving away from him. After a few moments, she dislodged herself and opened the front door.

"Dancing, huh?" She shook her head slightly, still grinning like a fool; eyes bright and beautiful.

He nodded, his smile muted and affectionate.

She really _was_ adorable.

"Yeah. Dinner, dancing-" His mouth converted into a dirty leer. "-and then a private show back here. In our bedroom."

Kate laughed, a little breathless and throaty. "Oh, Castle, you're getting one helluva show tonight. I promise."

_[][][]_

_At last my love has come along_

_My lonely days are over_

_And life is like a song_

_Oh yeah yeah, at last_

_The skies above are blue_

_My heart was wrapped up in clover_

_The night I looked at you_

* * *

**A/N: This theme will continue in the next chapter or two. I hope this was enjoyable; I really like writing flashbacks and of course, sexy Caskett. Man, I can't wait for season five to start - all of the kissing and the touching and the cuteness is gonna be canon! All of it. **

**As always, please review. The muse appreciates it.**

**Title - 'Howlin' for you' by the Black Keys; Lyrics at the end - the enchanting 'At last' by Etta James.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**


	51. Chapter 51

**A/N: There is no excuse for my tardiness, except that I am an expert procrastinator. Really, I'm pretty damn good at it. Furthermore, the muse and I have also not been communicating so well these last few weeks (months?). But, I hope that the dry spell is over.**

**This chapter continues for the previous one and it's definitely rated T for sexual content and for a bad word - first time ever. So, uh, yeah - whatever. No Lizzy or flashbacks in this one. Just Castle and Beckett being their sexy selves (I hope).**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Would I torture myself with a hiatus of like 4 months? I think not. **

* * *

**Chapter 51 - In My Veins**

He was checking his watch every few minutes, impatient and a little irritated. With her. For being late. She was supposed to home at six and instead she got there forty-five minutes later, rushing past him with a slew of apologies rolling off her tongue. He wasn't amused. And for once, the roles were reversed.

He checked his watch again and was growing more and more frustrated as the seconds ticked by.

"Kate!"

Seriously, they had a reservation at eight and still had to-

"I'm ready."

He spun around.

"Finally. It's about-" Rick trailed off, mouth falling open and jaw growing slack.

Dear god.

Screw the reservations, he wanted to say. Because, damn, being late was _soooo_ worth it when Kate Castle decided to bring out the big guns.

She was wearing a sexy, sheath purple taffeta dress that made love to every beautiful, delightful curve of her body. That body he knew so very well, so very intimately. He swallowed dryly, Adam's apple bobbing. He had a faint recollection of that Nikki Heat book launch so many years ago when he couldn't – like now – keep his eyes off of her. Her hair was loose and curly with an edge of wild, a little femme fatale.

A little Nikki Heat.

He was such a lucky bastard.

She seemed to be oblivious to his staring, busy searching for items to put in her black clutch bag, again apologising for being late. When she passed him, Rick snagged her arm and pulled her wordlessly towards him. Kate started to protest, but was cut off when her husband kissed her, hard and a little rough, his tongue sweeping smoothly into her mouth. There wasn't much of a height difference due to the pair of four-inch black sex-on-legs stilettos she was wearing.

When they broke apart, she stared at him, her eyes almost black with the dark, smoky eye make-up and desire burning against her irises.

"We're gonna be late," she murmured, her voice low and throaty.

He only shrugged in response and dipped his head to feather kisses along her jaw, down the slope of her neck. She exhaled shakily, her breath dancing past his cheek.

"You promised to take me dancing, Castle," she purred into his ear.

He pulled back and smiled, his large hands curling at her hips. He couldn't deny her, not ever.

"Indeed I did, Mrs. Castle." He gave her another quick kiss before holding out his arm to her. "Shall we?"

She smiled, eyes turning affectionate, everything in her softening for him.

"Let's go."

* * *

He was watching her. Again, as usual. Her eye were riveted on the jazz band currently perfoming on stage. They were sitting closely together, his arm slung over the back of her chair, her hand absent-mindedly resting on his thigh as they listened to the peformaners and nursing their drinks.

He leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against her cheek, caressing down to the corner of her mouth.

Just because he could.

"You enjoying this?" He murmured, lips ghosting over her skin.

She turned towards him, eyes sparkling with delight and brushed her mouth over his, fingers cradling his jaw.

"I love it. Thank you." She pressed another kiss against his lips. "I love you."

"I know," he said with a grin. "I mean, how could you not?"

Kate laughed in response, more like a breathless huff and pushed on his chest. "Yeah, Castle, okay. I admit it. I'm crazy about you and hot for you and I want you-"

He met her in a bruising kiss, his tongue spilling into her mouth, hands cradling her face.

"You're mean," he muttered breathlessly against her lips.

She hummed in amusement, eyes flicking down to his mouth. "What? Can't handle it, _kitten?"_

Rick narrowed his eyes, his face inches from hers. "You're gonna pay for that, Beckett."

Her mouth curved into a sly, clever smirk. "Promise?"

He only grinned and pulled her in for another kiss, soft and delicate; slowing the seduction down.

They had the whole night.

"May I have this dance, Mrs. Castle?"

Her mouth slid open into a luminous, pleased smile.

Mysterious and sexy - a vixen.

"Thought you'd never ask, Mr. Castle," she replied, eyes sparkling in the dim light.

* * *

They swayed, bodies molded together in perfect unison while the rhythmic beats of the music dragged them along like an ocean's tide. Lost in a world of their own making, a little island amid a sea of people and sounds and movement.

They've been on the dance floor for close to an hour - doing the salsa and the tango and now, just slowly moving to the music; completely immersed in one another.

Rick pulled his wife closer, cradling her against his chest. "I love you, Kate," he murmured against her temple.

She turned her head towards him, her lips finding a spot against his pulse. "I know. I love you too, Rick. So much."

His mouth curved into a soft smile, his hand brushing a strand of hair off her cheek.

"To infinity and beyond."

She breathed out a laugh. "Yes. To infinity and beyond."

He dipped his and kissed her; a slow, languid and thorough feasting on her mouth. They broke apart panting slightly as an evening of teasing looks and hot hands now coming to a lustful head.

"Take me home, Castle," Kate husked, her eyes dark and her jaw set in determination. She leaned closer, her teeth scraping against his earlobe. "I _want_ you." She touched her tongue to his skin. He let out grunt. "Now."

Rick sucked in a breath, his knees suddenly feeling wobbly.

"God, you're hot," he blurted out without thinking.

She laughed, a throaty, sexy sound that sent the blood singing in his veins.

"Come on, Mr. Castle, I promised you a show tonight."

* * *

She was going to kill him.

She'd been at it since they got in the cab; frisky hands making him squirm like a schoolboy and a sinful mouth undoing him with hot, wet kisses.

"Kate." His voice shook, breaking under the heavy pressure of arousal.

"Mm," she hummed, her breath fanning hotly over the skin of his neck. She feathered her lips up to his jaw, nibbling at his skin; teeth and tongue working him over in unison.

Rick let out a whimper and gripped her hips, trying very hard not to pull the emergency stop. He was _this _close to slamming her up against the wall and screwing her brains out in an elevator.

But, no, he wanted to do this right, proper. It was their anniversary. He wanted to lay her down and thoroughly, slowly worship every delectable inch-

He sucked in a breath when her hand traveled lower. "Kate," he squeaked, fumbling for her wrist.

She lifted her head, her eyes dark and clever. "What?" She purred, stepping even closer, pressing every curve of her lithe body against his.

He swallowed. "Uh-"

Before he could answer, the elevator doors opened.

She quirked an eyebrow. "Oh, that's too bad, Castle."

He frowned, his brain too muddled to connect the dots.

"What is?"

"The elevator doors opening."

What. Why? "Why is that disappointing?"

She bit her lip and shrugged, taking a step backwards. He followed her.

"Because, Rick, I really, _really_ wanted you to fuck me against the wall-"

He all but growled and crashed his mouth onto hers, aggressive and demanding; his self-control completely shattering as he pushed her backwards.

"God, Kate." He mumbled in between pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses along her neck. "God, you're so hot. So sexy."

She arched against him, seeking more contact; her mouth open and wet against his. Finally, her back hit the front door and she immediately hooked a leg around his leg, pressing her hips against his.

He groaned, his head buried in her neck, breath coming in harsh, short pants.

She sucked on his earlobe before murmuring: "Key."

He fumbled it out of his pocked and got the door open as fast as possible. The moment they were inside, Kate was wrapped around him, her legs circling his waist, her mouth at his jaw. At first he slammed her up against the door, mouths fused together. After a while, Rick started to walk them towards the study, but she grunted and shook her head.

"No, no. I want you in the kitchen." She squeezed her legs around him, her hips pushing against him. "On the counter."

Yep, she was going to kill him.

* * *

"Wow. I love this kitchen. Have I mentioned that? I really, _really_ love it." They were a heap of half-naked, tangled, sated limbs on the kitchen floor.

Kate laughed and shifted to rest her head on his chest. "Mm, me too." She shivered and moved even closer.

"Cold?"

She nodded. "A little bit."

"You wanna get up?" He hoped she said no because it was gonna take him a few minutes to find his legs again.

She huffed in amusement. "Don't think I can walk just yet, Castle." Kate lifted her head to look at him, grinning impishly. "You really wore me out. . . s_tud."_

Judging by her loud and vigorous encouragement and exclamations, he'd bet there was a lot of truth to that statement. His ego was not saying 'no thank you' to that.

Rick kissed her and grabbed his nearby discarded jacket and draped it over his wife, who was only in her underwear.

Well, what was left of it.

They laid in silence for a few minutes, heart rates returning to normal. Kate was half asleep when her husband spoke again.

"You were a little drunk tonight, weren't you?"

She jerked up, staring down at him. "What? No, I wasn't."

He grinned at that. "Oh, no. Are you sure?"

"Castle, I was _not_ drunk."

He lifted his hands in acquiescence, the grin still fastened to his mouth.

"Hey, I don't mind. Believe me. Tipsy Beckett is quite sexy."

She huffed and sat up, his large jacket sliding off and exposing her shoulder.

He also sat up, his chest to her back. "I mean, you were all over me tonight." He pressed a kiss against the skin of her exposed shoulder. "At dinner, they way you kept undressing me with your eyes."

"You did that too," she muttered.

"Of course I did. I was fantasizing about getting you out of that sexy dress."

She smiled and turned her body into his.

He pressed another kiss to her skin. "And in the cab, you kept sliding your hand up my thigh and then some."

"And that proves that I was a little drunk?"

He let out a soft laugh. "Well, you rarely behave indecently in public, _Beckett._" He touched his lips to that spot just beneath her ear.

"Should I remind you of the elevator earlier this evening. You practically had your hand down my pants and you wanted me to, uh, take you against the wall of that elevator. Which I'm taking a rain check on by the way."

She chuckled at that and stood up. "Okay, sure, Rick. You can cash in for the next time I'm a little drunk."

He lit up, following her. "Ha! So you admit that you were a little drunk?"

She rolled her eyes, opening the refrigerator and pulling his jacket tighter around her.

"Okay, maybe I was a little tipsy," she conceded with a lift of her shoulders. "Why does it matter so much?"

He wrapped his arms around her from behind. "Because I like it when you get a little wild, Beckett," he whispered in her ear, pulling her back against him.

She grinned and turned in his arms.

"Oh, Castle, I don't need to get a little drunk to get a little wild and. . . kinky. You should know that by now."

She stepped out of his hold and sauntered off.

"Where are you going?" He asked dumbly, staring at her naked, mile long legs.

"To bed." Before he could rush after her, Kate turned around; something mischievous in her expression. "There are strawberries in the refrigerator. Bring them." Her mouth curved into a sly, cunning smile.

His stomach flipped.

"Oh and don't forget the whipped cream. . . _stud._"

Best. Anniversary. Ever.

_[][][]_

_I must admit, I can't explain_

_Any of these thoughts racing through my brain_

_It's true baby, I'm howlin' for you_

* * *

**A/N: Eeh, it's been a while and I've had my fair share of arguments with the muse. I hope this was... satisfactory. **

**Thank for all the reviews and support for this story - you are all wonderful, even though I am lousy at updates. **

**Title - well, we all know this one don't we? Lyrics at the end - 'Howlin' for you', the Black Keys.**


	52. Chapter 52

**A/N: Howdy, ya'll! Just 3 more weeks before we all die and meet each other in 'Castle' heaven. I literally cannot wait! Anywho, the next chapter is just something that popped into my head and I will continue with it for another chapter or two. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I have absolute faith and trust in Andrew Marlowe. We love you.**

* * *

**Chapter 52 - Early in the Morning**

It was early - just past 7am. On a Saturday. So, why was her husband not in bed, curled around her? She was cold.

Somewhere nearby she could hear the clicks of fingers on a keyboard.

"Castle," Kate mumbled sleepily, eyes fluttering open against the pale sunlight streaming in through the windows.

The typing stopped and she felt the bed dip close to her side.

"Morning," Rick greeted softly, a hand brushing along her back as he sat down next to her.

She pushed up onto her elbows and yawned. "What are you doing outta bed, babe?"

He laughed softly – she rarely used that moniker. "I couldn't sleep anymore." He lowered his voice. "Nikki whispered in my ear and I just had to get a scene down."

Her mouth curved into a grin. "Oh, Nikki whispered in your ear, huh?"

Rick slid down and lied next to her on his side. "She sure did."

Kate hummed, her eyes still drooping. "What did she say?"

He reached out and twirled a finger around a strand of wayward hair, painted golden in the light of their room.

He shrugged. "Oh, you know? Sexy little things."

Kate quirked an eyebrow, unable to keep the amusement off her face.

"Really? You were writing a sex scene at seven on a Saturday morning?"

He chuckled softly. "Well, I was getting there. Building up to it." He flashed a completely indecent grin. "You know how much I enjoy foreplay."

Kate laughed, soft and light. "God, you're insatiable."

"I don't hear you complaining, Mrs. Castle," he murmured, shifting closer to press a kiss against her lips.

"So what do you want to do today?" Kate asked after they broke apart.

"Besides you? Now? Under the hot spray of the shower?"

She barked out a surprised laugh and swatted his chest.

"Is that _all_ you ever think about?"

He grinned. "With you around-" He made a show of checking her out, clad only in boy shorts and a tank-top. "-scantily dressed? Absolutely. How could I not? You should take it as a compliment, Beckett."

She rolled her eyes, a smile lingering at the edges of her mouth.

"Get your head out of the gutter, Rick. What do you want to do with your daughter and me today?"

He stared at her and Kate frowned at him. "Just taking a mental picture." And suddenly he was up. "But to answer your question – I want to go the Museum of National History and then maybe to the Park."

"Seriously, Castle? The museum?" She deadpanned.

He was literally bouncing on his feet. "They have mummies there. _Mummies_, Kate! Oh, and dinosaurs. So awesome."

Kate rolled onto her back and groaned, covering her face with a hand.

"I'm married to a twelve year old."

* * *

"_Beckett, come on," he all but whined in her ear. She was going to kill him. Slowly, painfully. Limb-by-limb._

_It was barely past five._

_She was supposed to be the morning person in this relationship, not Castle. Well, the universe was probably turned on its head while he was on a writing binge._

"_Kate, come on." He was literally dragging her out of bed to watch the sun come up. He threw off the covers and pulled her into a sitting position._

_She scowled at him, hair in disarray and still half asleep. "I'm going to kill you," she muttered menacingly. _

_He seemed completely oblivious to the grievous bodily harm that he was threatened with. Rick only held out his hand and smiled at her; his features glowing with joy, eyes sparkling with little-boy-delight. She couldn't help but find it utterly adorable. _

_Irritating and infuriating. But still-_

_Cute._

_She relented with a heavy sigh and offered him her hand. _

_"This better be worth it," she muttered._

_He pulled her up and towards him before pressing a quick, sloppy kiss against her mouth; sharing his happiness with her._

_"Oh, you'll_ love_ it. I know you will."_

_Kate placed a hand against her mouth, trying to obscure her smile as he led her by hand out of the room. Silly, adorable man. He was babbling on about how he was writing and eventually caught sight of the sun rising over the New York skyline and how he could not let a romantic moment such as this one get away._

_It struck her then - how completely he shared himself with her, every moment, every little thing. How completely he loved her. _

_"I made coffee," he said, breaking her train of thought. Rick held out a cup of coffee to her with a grin. She returned a smile, her eyes soft on him as she accepted it._

_"Thank you." She lifted up and pressed her lips against his cheek._

_He returned a gentle smile and took her smaller hand in his. "Come on, we don't want to miss the show."_

_Rick led her up the stairs in her kitchen and out onto the veranda. On the horizon, the summer sun was rising over the city. The cool morning was crisp and the sky a blend of brilliant hues of orange, yellow and pink._

_They were both silent, drinking in the quiet beauty of the breaking dawn. _

_Kate shivered and stepped closer to him, cradling the cup of coffee against her chest; both of them watching the quick rise of the sun._

_"It's beautiful," she said softly after a while. _

_Rick nodded and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, a hand curling around her upper arm. _

_"Yeah," he said softly. He turned to look at her, a smile on his lips. "So, was it worth getting out of bed for?"_

_Kate laughed softly, dropping her head back against his chest while her eyes scanned the horizon. _

_She lifted her eyes to him and smiled._

_"You're always worth it."_

* * *

"Oh, look at this one, baby girl," Rick said, pointing towards the large display of dinosaur bones. Lizzy was bouncing in his arms, babbling around the little fingers in her mouth. She was in a cute yellow polka dot summer dress complete with a small, white cardigan and sandals. Her dark, curly hair fell over her forehead and framed her rosy little cheeks. She was a few weeks away from eighteen months - growing up entirely too fast for her parents' liking; walking everywhere and starting to express herself in words.

"This is the T-Rex or tyrannosaurus rex," Rick continued talking to his daughter, moving slowly around the display. She shot her arm out and pointed her little hand towards the display. She turned serious blue eyes to her father and babbled incoherently; only a few words recognisable - the most prominent being 'Dada'.

Of course, her parents have argued about whose title she graced with her first word - 'Mama' or 'Dada'.

Kate was slowly meandering behind them and pushing the empty stroller, watching them fondly. They were in their own bubble; a father and his daughter sharing a special moment.

They were _so_ going to tag-team her.

"You still want to show her the mummies, Castle?"

He whipped around, nodding eagerly and grinning widely at his wife.

"Definitely."

She returned a smile as she made her way to them.

"Of course you do." She brushed a finger over her daughter's nose, making the little girl giggle. "Should we also tell our daughter about you and the mummy's curse?"

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Don't you dare."

She grinned, raising an eyebrow. "What?" She shrugged. "Don't you want her to know about _all_ the exciting cases we closed over the years?"

Lizzy was kicking her small legs against her father's chest, watching everything and everybody over his shoulder.

"Only the ones where I look like an all-conquering hero."

Kate smirked at him. "Well, _that_ would be a short story then, wouldn't it?"

He stopped to put Lizzy in the stroller, the girl babbling and bouncing in her seat.

"Excuse me, Detective Beckett, but should I remind you of all the times I've saved your life?"

Kate rolled her eyes as they slowly walked through the exhibition, bantering like they always did.

"Oh, Castle, you don't let an opportunity go by to remind me of your heroics."

"Well, someone has to," he murmured, pouting slightly.

Kate bumped her shoulder with his, trying, but failing to keep the mirth from the lift of her lips.

"Oh, honey, you _are_ my hero. And yes, you have on occasion saved my life," she said, wrapping her hand around his arm as he pushed Lizzy's stroller. "We've saved each other's lives. That's what partners do, right?"

"Some more than others," Rick muttered softly.

Kate let out a laugh, attention on Lizzy who was chattering excitedly; little hands gesturing to everything around her. She was a bright, curious and attentive little girl; picking up on things quickly and absorbing new knowledge rapidly.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

He turned to his wife with a self-satisfied grin.

"It means that I've saved your life about. . . mm. . . eleven times and you've only saved mine about nine times."

Kate's eyebrows shot up in disbelief, her eyes flicking back to her husband.

"Firstly, I can't even believe that you've kept score and secondly, there's no way you've saved my life more than I've saved yours. Eleven? _Please._" She rolled her eyes.

"Oh, really? Let's review shall we?"

She was smiling against her will, pressing against him as they walked through the Museum of National History.

"Castle-"

He continued, unperturbed. "First, there was that mad gun man who I distracted with the champagne bottle-" Lizzy let out a squeal and clapped her little hands together. Rick grinned broadly and bent down towards his daughter. "Yes, baby girl, I bravely saved your mother's life with a mere champagne bottle."

Kate made a face and started to protest, but Rick held up a hand to stop her.

"Even you admitted that I saved your life that day."

He resumed reciting his heroics. "The second time was when that madman blew up your apartment and I braved the hellish flames to break down the door. I found you naked in your tub. Yeah, _won't_ be forgetting that anytime soon."

Kate rolled her eyes again, her lips tipping up. "So, what am I? Chopped liver? What about the times _I_ saved _you?"_ She turned to him, a clever smile painting her face. "I've also saved you from a madman, Castle. _And_ I have the scars to prove it."

He immediately tensed, the smile fading from his features, the amusement leaking out of his eyes. Kate briefly closed her eyes for a moment and bit her lip.

Stupid, stupid mouth.

"Rick," she said softly. She stopped him, her hand squeezing around his arm to get his attention. "Wait, I'm sorry-"

He shook his head, lifting his eyes to her. "No, no. It's fine, babe." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders for a quick hug. "It just. . . gets me sometimes," he said quietly, his voice low.

Kate pressed her cheek against his collarbone, eyes falling shut. "Still - I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking."

He gave her a small, lopsided smile. "It's okay. Really." He pressed a kiss against her cheek. "It's done, it's over - I'm just glad we got the bastard."

* * *

_She was clutching her side, blood trickling over her fingers. "Castle, you okay?"_

_He nodded absently, concerned eyes on her. "Fine. You?"_

_She nodded and then winced as she crouched down behind the chair where he was tied to. "Yeah. Ryan and Esposito are on their way with back-up and EMT's."_

_"He dead?" Rick gestured to the lifeless body of Jerry Tyson a.k.a. the 3XK-killer. _

_Kate grunted. "Yeah, I put two bullets in his chest. The son of a bitch is rotting in hell as we speak," she said, cutting the ropes off her partner. As soon as he was free and standing, she launched herself into his arms for a tight embrace and finally let the emotions that she had been bottling up, to come out._

_"Oh god, Rick, I'm so glad you're okay," she sobbed, tightening her arms around his neck. "I'm so glad you're okay."_

_He pressed a kiss against the side of her head, his trembling arms building a wall around her. _

_"I'm fine, we're fine," he soothed. He rubbed a hand down her side and encountered the sticky warmth of her blood._

_"Kate, you're bleeding," he said with urgency, pulling back to look at her wound_

_She glanced down to where his hand was hovering. "It's just a scratch. I'm fine."_

_His eyes snapped up to her; fiery blue. "Doesn't look like just a scratch."_

_Kate sagged against him, her hands on his chest. "Make you a deal - while you get this-" she gently touched the nasty abrasion on his forehead, making him flinch. "-checked out, I will let them sort me out as well. Okay?"_

_He nodded and carefully wrapped his arms around her again. "Okay." He feathered his lips over her forehead, her cheeks and finally down to her mouth. "Thank you."_

_She offered him a soft, tired smile. "That's what partners are for."_

_[][][]_

_Early in the morning, I'll come calling, _

_I'll come calling after you_

_darling if you answer, oh we'll wander,_

_down the garden where it's cool_

_later we'd discover, all in covers, _

_children silent as the stars_

_early in the morning, in the morning, _

_everything at once is ours_

* * *

**A/N: These characters have a mind of their own sometimes - I didn't intend writing that last part, but just couldn't help it. Anyway, the chapter will follow on from this one; just something light and fluffy.**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing.**

**Title - from a James Vincent McMorrow song of the same name. Lyrics at the end - from the same song.**


	53. Chapter 53

**A/N: I'm so sorry (*insert sincere, pleading look*). The muse and I are going to therapy to repair this lack of communication and inspiration. But, good news, I am on vacation now and will be writing more frequently now that I have more time.**

**Anywho, this chapter is actually a continuation of the previous one (which was literally written months ago) and will include some conflict. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Marlowe is a perfect genius and I love him. That is all. **

* * *

**Chapter 53 - Poison & Wine**

"Dot! Dot!" Lizzy squealed, jumping up and pointing a miniature finger at a golden Labrador trotting past them with a Frisbee in its mouth.

After their trip to the Museum, they sat down on the lush, green grass to enjoy ice cream in the park, drinking in the beautiful bright day, the warm sun and crisp, blue sky.

Kate laughed and sat up, curling an arm around her daughter in a loose hug. "Yes, baby, that's a dog. You like doggies, don't you?"

The little girl turned to face her mother, her eyebrows furrowed; her blue eyes sparkling and intense.

"Dot, Mama."

The detective grinned and pressed a smacking kiss against her daughter's cheek. She felt proud and excited because her daughter was beginning to talk and string sentences together.

It was completely adorable.

"I see, sweetheart."

Lizzy swivelled her head back when she heard the excited barking from the dog. She jabbered away enthusiastically, throwing her hands around and gesturing to the animal. Kate smiled and rested her chin on her little girl's shoulder, a hand on her stomach to keep her steady and close.

"Hey, what're you looking at?"

Kate whipped around, startled by her husband's voice. Rick sat down next to them after dispensing with their garbage.

"Hey," she greeted, a smile dawning over her features. "Our daughter just fell in love with that Labrador over there," she said, gesturing with her head towards the dog.

He chuckled. "Won't be long now before she begs for one."

"Yeah, well, that's not gonna happen anytime soon," Kate remarked.

Rick only grinned as he watched his daughter waddle between them.

"You underestimate the power of the Castle charm, Detective."

She laughed, a single note of amusement. "Oh, please. The Castle charm is not _nearly_ as effective as you think, Writer Boy." She glanced at him, quirking an eyebrow; her dark eyes toying with him. "I mean, it took you about four years to get out of the friend zone."

He gaped at her in shock, sitting up. "The friend zone? Excuse me, but I was _never_ in the friend zone."

Kate only pressed her lips together, trying not to grin. "Oh, really?"

"Yeah, okay, we were friends." Rick lifted his chin defiantly. "But I _chose_ to be your friend and I was a good friend."

She raised an eyebrow, trying to hold onto Lizzy as she clambered all over her mother in an effort to get Kate's attention.

"Uh-huh. Except, you were trying to sleep with me the whole time."

"What?" He looked at her in mild disbelief. "Me? _You're_ the one who was trying to sleep with _me."_

Kate whipped her head towards him and frowned.

"What?"

Rick smirked at her, almost leering. "Oh, come on, Kate. Don't tell me you dressed the way you did in those four years for Esposito or Ryan."

She rolled her eyes and laughed, amusement colouring the sound.

"You're so full of it, Castle."

"Well, you're not denying it, Detective," he shot back with a wry smile, bumping his shoulder against hers.

She glanced at him from beneath her eyelashes, coyly biting her lip. His flickered down to the movement, instinctively leaning closer to his wife.

"No, I'm not."

Kate leaned towards him and touched her lips to his, cool and light. He palmed her cheek and deepened the kiss, claiming ownership of her mouth and stealing her breath. Finally, they broke apart; foreheads pressed together while wearing matching grins. Just then, Lizzy squeaked out a yawn and tiredly rubbed her eyes.

Rick sat back and chuckled, rubbing soothing circles over his little girl's back. "Looks like someone is fading fast."

"Mmm," Kate hummed, brushing her fingers through her daughter's dark, curly hair. "Too much excitement for one day for our little magpie."

_Little magpie?_

Rick smothered a grin at the newest moniker. His wife detested nicknames and was slow to warm up to his creative ones for her and also slow to bestow him with her own titles. With their daughter, however, it spilled out of her mouth without any hesitation or warning.

It was completely adorable, of course.

"Well, we should get going then. It's getting late," he said, getting to his feet and holding a hand out to his wife.

Kate smiled and reached out for his hand, holding Lizzy closer against her. He pulled her up, his other hand coming to her waist to steady her.

"Wanna walk or take a cab?" He asked while Kate carefully placed Lizzy in her stroller.

She bit her lip. "Uh, let's walk for a while, yeah?"

"Sure." He smiled and pressed a quick kiss against her cheek, taking the stroller. Kate weaved her arm around his, her hand on his bicep and her cheek against his shoulder, failing to keep the smile from her mouth.

Happy and in love.

The day was slowly, leisurely drawing to a close - the heat simmering down to a pleasant mildness, the cool breeze gently brushing through the trees, providing a melody of rustling leaves. It felt like days gone by, like a nostalgic trip down memory lane to a place of shared experiences and memories - good, bad and every strange, mundane thing in between.

* * *

_"I can't believe you are on call three days before Christmas," Rick whined as they trudged slowly through the cold, heavy snow._

_"Yeah, well, welcome to the life of a New York cop, Castle," Kate retorted dryly._

_It was their first Christmas together and before the call came in, they were busy with Christmas decorations - very domestic and disgustingly cute. But, alas, murder had interrupted them before they could become a cheesy Hallmark card._

_He was still muttering unhappily when they arrived at the scene, Lanie and the boys already there around the body which looked like - you've gotta be kidding - the man himself-_

_"Hey, someone killed Santa!" Rick exclaimed, his eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree, suddenly giddy with excitement. _

_"My bet is on one of the elves," Ryan commented dryly._

_"Nah, bro, I'm going with Mrs. Claus," Esposito piped in._

_Rick grimaced and shook his head. "No, too sweet and grandmotherly to be a cold-blooded killer."_

_"No, think about it - it's always the sweet, normal-looking ones who go all apeshit," the Hispanic detective argued._

_Rick shrugged. "I'm going with Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer."_

_The two detectives gave him blank, unimpressed looks. _

_"That's weak, bro."_

_"Disappointing, Castle. Very unrealistic."_

_"Oh, come on! It's perfectly plausible. Tired of a life of unpaid labour and tired of being whipped by a fat old man, Rudolph finally-"_

_"Snapped. Just like I'm about to, Writer Boy, if you don't zip it," Lanie grumbled sourly, but without any real bite. She caught Kate's eye and shook her head as if to say 'how do you stay sane?'_

_Kate rolled her eyes and shared a smirk with the ME, deciding to intervene in the boys' ridiculous little theory-building game. _

_"You know some of us are trying to catch the real killer so that we can actually go and celebrate Christmas."_

_Rick shrugged, his eyes dancing. "But that's what we're doing, Detective."_

_Kate suppressed her grin and tried to ignore her ruggedly handsome partner and his dancing eyes. _

_"So, __Doctor Parish, what have you got?"_

* * *

The three Castles were meandering through the streets of New York in silence; the smallest Castle dreaming of puppy dogs while the two adults were lost in their own thoughts.

After a few minutes, Rick caught sight of his wife, frowning and chewing on her lip.

He bumped her shoulder. "Hey, what's going on in that pretty head of yours?"

Kate looked up, startling at his voice, and gave him a tilt of her lips.

"Nothing. . . Just thinking about how we need to start looking at preschools for Lizzy. I've already found some great ones that have fantastic programmes."

He jerked to an abrupt stop, completely caught off guard. They haven't really discussed it; sure, they found a good daycare centre to take Lizzy to when both of them had to work. But putting her in preschool hadn't even made onto the agenda of things that needed to be discussed and negotiated.

He felt blindsided.

"_What?_" His chest felt tight, the air sucked out of his lungs. "W-what do you mean?"

She lazily lifted a shoulder, seemingly unfazed by his shocked reaction. It pissed him off - that subtle demonstration of indifference at his show of emotion that Kate was so good at. Like what he felt was always an overreaction or melodramatic and not worth so much consideration. Like he was a naughty kid seeking for attention.

"Castle, we need to find her a preschool. She's over eighteen months old."

He shook his head, brow furrowing. "Yeah, so? What's your point?"

She stared at him like he had grown a second head. She crossed her arms defensively, sensing an argument on the horizon.

"Rick, other kids go to daycare or preschool at a very early age. Some when they're only a few months old."

He clenched his jaw, feeling offended for some reason. Was she thinking of a preschool because she didn't think he was doing a good enough job? Oh, they've had their share of arguments and disagreements about parenting - ranging from sleeping routines to discipline.

"Why do we _have_ to, Kate? We have the luxury of me being at home. Alexis didn't go to any daycare or damn preschool when she was a baby and she turned out just fine. Believe it or not, but I'm not completely useless at taking care of our kid."

It would be a cold day in hell if Richard Castle shipped his kid off to some stranger-

"Are you freaking kidding me?" Kate hissed, trying to keep her voice down; her green eyes suddenly coming alive with anger.

"God, Castle, I'm not questioning your parenting skills, you asshole," she grit out. "I'm thinking about what our daughter needs." He opened his mouth to make another comment, but she beat him to it. "And she needs to be around other kids her age. She needs that interaction, that stimulation."

"So, that's it? You decide and I just have to say 'yes, dear'," he barked out, hands fisted around the stroller handle.

Kate growled in frustration, dropping her head into a hand, rubbing her forehead. They were _not_ one of those couples who argued on a busy New York sidewalk.

Well, there's always the exception to the rule, wasn't there?

"Can we just not do this right here? Let's just get home. I don't want to make a scene in public."

"Yes dear," Rick bit out sarcastically, turning away from her and resuming the trek back to their loft. Kate narrowed her eyes and literally almost bit her tongue from making a comment.

He was on edge; the line of his shoulders tense and his body rigid with restrained anger. She hung back, unwilling to be near him right now when both of them were hot under the collar - and not in a good way. When they fought, things could get nasty sometimes.

How the hell did such a great day turn into _this_?

They stopped at a crossing, less than a block away from their apartment building. Both wearing unhappy scowls and trying, but failing, to ignore the other one. When the light turned green, the throng of people pushed them along and caused Kate to accidently step on her husband's heel.

"Damn it, Kate, watch where you're going," he snarled under his breath, his hostile eyes finding hers.

She jerked her head to look at him, quickly masking the apology and hurt that flashed across her features and replacing it with anger.

"God, Castle, grow up," she shot back hotly, walking out in front of him.

He let out a sardonic laugh. "Yeah, _of course_ that's the problem. I'm a child, right?"

"Well, it _is_ the problem now." She turned to look at him as they reached their apartment building. "You're acting like a spoilt brat - throwing a temper tantrum before giving me a chance to state my case."

"No, I don't think that's it." He shook his head, his eyes hard on her. "The problem is that you feel guilty for not being here and you're jealous that I get to spend time with her. And now you want to even things out."

Kate flinched and went stock still, face blanching. Her mouth parted on a silent, pained gasp. They stared at each other for a long time, the hurt and absolute devastation bleeding out over her face.

Shit, this was bad. Very bad. He wanted to take it back, but it was too late because-

She was already turning around and listlessly entering the building, shoulders slumping and a hand going to her cheek. Rick let out a heavy sigh and screwed his eyes shut. After a few moments, he opened his eyes again and pushed the stroller forward, silently thankful that his daughter was fast asleep and unable to witness the complete jackass her father could be.

Big, stupid mouth.

* * *

_Shit. What just happened? _

_The one moment, they were yelling at each other inside her apartment and next one, he's standing alone outside her apartment. He lifted his hand to knock on her door, but hesitated. They needed time to cool off. Translation: Kate needed space. He sighed heavily and leaned against the door, hoping, wishing she was still standing just on the other side. _

_But even if she was, he needed to leave, needed to give what she asked of him. So he pushed off the door, turned and walked away; willing his feet to keep moving forward and away from her._

_That had been one of the nastiest, cruellest fights he's ever been in. He has the scars to prove it. . . and she probably has some of her own to show as well. _

_It all started when he found her homemade murder board. _

_She had been dismissive when he voiced his concerns and had waved him off when he pointed out that she was still having nightmares. That made him angry and somewhat bitter. _

_"Why didn't you tell me about this, Kate?" He had demanded._

_"Because it's none of your damn business, Castle. It doesn't concern you," she all but yelled back. That hurt like hell and he snapped back, telling her that she was hiding in her mother's murder, too scared, too much of a coward to live her life, to love him completely._

_He saw the horrible transformation that took place in her after those words; how she built up those notorious walls, how her eyes shuttered. And worst of all, how cold, shut off her voice sounded when she had told him:_

_"You know what we are, Castle? We're over. Now get out."_

* * *

It was eerily quiet in the elevator ride up to their penthouse apartment. Rick kept sneaking glances at his wife, trying to gauge just how badly he had screwed. Judging by her clenched jaw and too tightly controlled poker face, it was pretty bad.

Instinctively, he shifted closer, needing some sort of contact. Kate, however, moved away from him - needing space. He sighed and turned his attention back to the toddler in the stroller. Lizzy was still sleeping peacefully, blissfully unaware of the heavy tension between her parents.

Rick mustered his courage and reached out a finger to brush against his wife's hand. She immediately retracted her hand as if burned and folded her arms.

"_Don't_ touch me," she said softly, her voice sounding like shattering glass. He turned to look at her, taken aback by acidity in her tone. She was like a wounded animal - hurt and dangerous. Her eyes glittered, body rigid, walls up.

The doors opened and she quickly stepped out. He sighed again and followed her.

"Kate, I'm-"

She whipped around, that careful blank mask slipping to reveal the wounded woman behind it. Shit, she was crying.

"Don't."

He grabbed her wrist. "Please, just. . . I'm sorry, okay?" She was glaring at him, chest heaving with the effort of trying to keep her tears at bay. He felt a dark desperation clawing at his guts to repair the damage. "I'm so, so sorry. Please, I'll do anything to make it up to you."

Her mouth twisted into a cruel, unhappy sneer. "Maybe we should go for counselling, Rick."

Oh. Oh, wow - that _hurt_.

He recoiled and dropped her wrist, stepping back. That was. . . vicious. Yes, Kate could be vicious and absolutely heartless - and he didn't like (_hated_) that side of her. Especially when she was using his vulnerability, his own insecurities against him.

All's fair in love and war, supposedly.

But, God, it hurt like a sonofabitch. She knew what that meant to him, how he was the one in his previous marriages to suggest marriage counselling in an effort to save them and how that particular plan of action had failed. She _knew_ and yet-

Oh, well, judging by the guilt all over her face, at least she was showing some form of remorse.

He swallowed hard, one hand pushing the stroller forward, the other hand - shakily - fishing out the keys out of his pants' pocket.

"Castle," she murmured, her voice raspy and strained; her tone coated with apology.

He unlocked the door and pushed it open. "Guess we're even now," he muttered, suddenly so very tired before walking into their home.

* * *

_"I brought you coffee," she said softly, holding out the cup to him like a peace offering, an apology. His eyes flickered from the cup to her face again, hesitant and eager at the same time._

_After a while, he stepped back and opened his door to her. A peace offering, an apology. Her lips briefly lifted, like a weight had been removed from her shoulders. As she passed him, he took his cup of coffee from her._

_"Thanks," he murmured, giving her a small smile which she returned. He closed the door and turned to face her and was suddenly struck by how vulnerable and small she looked, standing there in his living room, fidgeting with a coffee cup and chewing on her lip._

_When she lifted her eyes to him, they were glistening with tears. "Rick, I'm so sorry."_

___He raked a hand through his hair and set the cup of coffee on the nearest surface. _"Okay. . ." _He stepped closer to her, hope blooming in his chest. _"I'm sorry too, Kate. The things I said were-"

_"Accurate," she cut him off, putting her cup on the coffee table and moving towards him. "You were right, Castle. I was hiding in my mother's murder." He tried to say something, but she placed a hand against his mouth; her fingers warm and soft. "But I don't want to anymore. I want to live, I want to be free." She moved her hand from his mouth to his chest, laying it over his sternum. _

_"I want it all with you."_

_His lips curved hesitantly, his eyes sparkling with anticipation. "Yeah?" He covered her smaller hand with his larger one. _

_Her face transformed into beautiful joy, quantified in a wide, carefree smile. _

_"Yeah." _

_He kissed her then, hard and a little desperate; happiness released in movement of his lips over hers, the slide of her tongue against his. _

_"I love you, Kate. I love you," he murmured fervently against her mouth._

_She grinned, winding her arms around his shoulders and pressing her body closer to his. _

_"I know, Castle. I love you too." She hugged him tightly. "We'll get through this."_

* * *

"Come on, baby. Let's get you to bed."

Rick lifted his little girl out of the stroller, meeting her bleary eyes and unhappy whimpering. "Shh, it's okay. Mommy's going to tuck you in, Sweet Pea." He turned towards Kate who was regarding them with tenderness, but as soon as she had his attention, she masked that gentleness and held out her arms for the baby.

He hugged his daughter and kissed her cheek before handing her to Kate, trying, but failing to catch her eyes. She turned and walked away, whispering to their daughter. He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face.

"Kate."

She stopped and turned around, suddenly looking very weary. "Go write, Rick. We'll talk later," she said quietly, her voice sounding like a white flag.

He nodded and swallowed back the tightness in his throat.

"Okay, yeah."

An hour later, Kate found him in his office, typing away furiously and seemingly lost in his own world. Sometimes, she was envious of that - how he could lose himself to solitude in his words, how he could go to a completely different place and find distraction in his stories. She leaned against the door frame and watched him for a moment, just admiring, appreciating how. . . beautiful he was. She was still mad and hurt as hell, but an hour of cooling down provided her with some perspective and insight.

They _both_ had some serious insecurities simmering underneath the surface that needed attention.

"Castle," she called softly and he looked up at her, startled by the intrusion. He sat back and seemed less burdened, but still wounded.

Kate stayed by the door, making no move to come closer. She needed physical distance while he didn't. Sometimes, he wished that she would break that rule, that she would compromise and give a physical step towards him.

Rick sighed. "So, I suppose we have to talk about today, huh?"

Kate let out a laugh, pushing off the door frame and moving towards his desk, sitting on the edge. He shot her a surprised look, his mouth curving into a grin.

"Yeah, it would seem so."

A few moments of awkward silence followed before they said at the same time:

"I'm sorry."

They shared a smile which seemed to break the awkward tension a little bit. Rick leaned forward and was tempted to reach for her hand, but decided against it, knowing that would be pushing it.

"Kate, I'm sorry. I overreacted and what I said. . . God, I'm so sorry. I. . . wasn't thinking." He stared at her, his eyes boring into her. He gave up on not reaching out to her and took her hand in his, forcing her to meet his eyes. She was near tears - again. "Please. . . I'm sorry so, honey. Forgive me?"

She rewarded him with a watery smile - just a upward curl of her mouth - and met his eyes.

Eventually she nodded and softly said: "Okay, I forgive you."

She chewed on her lip and he waited her out, knowing she was forming a response. "Why did you react the way you did, Rick? It's not like I'm suggesting we send our daughter off to boarding school."

He sighed and sat back, suddenly feeling stupid for his reaction. "I- To be honest, I felt a little blindsided by the whole thing. We haven't even talked about it and here you were suggesting we start looking at preschools."

She frowned. "I thought that was us discussing it. What do you have against preschools, anyway?"

"Nothing, nothing. It's just. . ." He let out a heavy breath. "Alexis wasn't in a preschool until she was four or five - and even then, I wasn't keen on the whole idea. She was my responsibility and I _loved_ it," he said with a wistful smile. Kate regarded him with soft eyes, imagining a young, clueless Rick Castle trying to give his little girl everything she needed.

He was such a wonderful father.

"Meredith left when she was two," he said quietly. She knew this already, he had told her about how his two marriages fell apart, but her heart broke every time. He spoke after a few silent moments, trying to settle his emotions.

"And it was just us - me and my little redhead against the world." He smiled again, his eyes painted with fatherly affection as he looked at the photo on his desk of himself and a young Alexis.

"I wanted her to know that she would never be alone - even though her mother left. That she was loved." His voice cracked at that. "That I would always be there for her, no matter what. That my career wouldn't be more important, that _nothing_ would be more important than her." He met his wife's eyes, his own teeming with tears. "I just want our daughter to know that too."

Kate was suddenly in front of him with her hands on his face. "She does, babe. You're a great dad, Castle." She kissed him delicately, her lips like candy floss against his mouth. "But, honey, you're not doing this alone."

He nodded, his eyes falling shut. "I know," he rasped, feeling too raw and too vulnerable.

"And you know I'm not questioning your parenting skills." He nodded again and opened his eyes; she had shifted back to sit on the desk right in front of him. "Hell, if someone's parenting should be questioned, it should be mine."

Damn.

It was meant as a joke, but he didn't find it funny. She had her own insecurities about not being there enough, about missing out, about not being what her daughter needed.

And he just stirred it up today when he brutally used those insecurities to hurt her.

He touched her knee. "Kate, don't do that." She looked at him. "You are great and you're here and you love her. You're the best mother that little girl could _ever_ ask for." He rubbed his thumb along her knee cap. "And hey - you said it yourself, I'm not doing this alone and I couldn't have asked for a better partner in this. "

"I know." She nodded and took a breath, wiping her cheeks. "And I'm sorry for what I said. I was hurt and I wanted to lash out. I didn't mean to-" She stopped abruptly, shaking her head. "No, actually I _did_ mean to hurt you and. . . I'm so sorry for that, Rick. That was cruel." She weaved her hand through his that was still on her knee.

"Forgive me?" She asked softly, her voice breaking.

He pulled her off the desk into his lap for a bone-crushing hug. "Always," he said, his mouth against her temple. "You know I love you even when I hate you, right?"

Kate breathed out a laugh, thin and fragile. She pulled back and gave him a small smile, a hand brushing along his jaw.

"Good to know. Ditto by the way 'cause I really hated you this afternoon."

"I deduced as much." He smiled. "You were thinking of ways killing me, weren't you?"

She laughed, a little brighter. "Actually about reasons for why I shouldn't."

He smiled and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Mm, that's comforting."

Even though the wounds were still fresh, things were getting better if they could joke about it.

They were silent for a few moments before Kate lifted an eyebrow and asked:

"So. . . truce?"

He nodded in agreement and softly agreed. "Truce."

Kate shifted off his lap, holding out her hand for him to take which he did without hesitation.

"You wanna discuss the whole preschool thing now?"

He groaned as she pulled him along to their bedroom. "No, please not. Can we leave that discussion for tomorrow? I'm depressed enough already as it is."

Kate grinned and nodded. "Yeah, we could do that."

He pulled her back to him as they walked into their bedroom.

"Wanna have passionate, slightly angry make-up sex?"

She laughed, full and rich. It made his gut clench.

"As enticing as that sounds and as tempted as I am, can we take a rain check? I'm not really in the mood," she said, biting her lip. "I kinda just want to cuddle with my guy."

_And lick our wounds._

He gave her a gentle smile, bracketing her waist with his arms and leaning in to rest his mouth against hers, his lips finding their home in her kiss.

"Sounds good to me, Mrs. Castle."

_[][][]_

_It's better to feel pain, than nothing at all_

_The opposite of love's indifference_

_Pay attention now, I'm standing on your porch screaming out_

_And I wont leave until you come downstairs_

_So keep your head up, keep your love_

* * *

**A/N: Call me sadistic, but I kinda like writing conflict between them. And I enjoyed exploring that facet of their relationship in this chapter. I hope it was good for you too.**

**Your reviews are like drugs - the good kind of course.**

**Title - The Civil Wars' song of the same title.**

**Lyrics at the end - from the song 'Stubborn Love' by the Lumineers.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes. **


	54. Chapter 54

**A/N: This chapter is something that I've had on my laptop for quite a while - just something sweet and fluffy with a few flashbacks. In the following chapters, I'm planning on bringing crazy stalker lady back. **

**But in the meantime: enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Oh, please. I bow to the genius that is Andrew Marlowe.**

* * *

**Chapter 54 - In Sickness & In Health**

"Ugh," she grunted, turning onto her side. For the last two days, Kate Castle has been reduced to a sniveling, coughing, sore and utterly miserable human being. She sat up gingerly, her wavy hair falling haphazardly around her face and shoulders; her skin was pale and pasty, her nose red. She had the flu. And felt like a train-wreck victim. Just as she threw off the covers and placed one foot on the ground, Rick walked in with a tray filled with breakfast.

He stopped and raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing?" It was not even nine in the morning on a Saturday.

She glared at him and even in her weakened state and in fluffy pajamas, she was still somewhat intimidating.

He didn't flinch as he approached his sick wife.

"Getting out of bed," she croaked, her voice cracking.

"No, you're not." He placed the tray on the bedside table and proceeded to haul her back into bed without much difficulty. To say that his wife was upset would be an understatement.

She glowered at him. "Rick-"

"You're gonna eat your breakfast, drink your pills and _then_ you can get out and take a shower." He paused for a moment. "And after you have taken a shower, you're getting back in bed."

She was stunned, her mouth falling open in shock. "I- You. . ." He was watching her with a stern expression and eventually she relinquished. A staring match with Richard Castle when he was acting all Papa Bear was useless.

Besides, he was much too adorable when he was being protective.

"Fine," she groused, wearing an impressive pout.

He grinned boyishly and carefully placed the tray with breakfast on her lap. She watched him with narrowed eyes, but couldn't help the smile tugging at her lips.

After a while, she asked: "Where's Lizzy?"

He took a sip of his own orange juice. "Uh, my mother has her." He gave a knowing look and a sly smile. "She's trying to feed her."

Kate's eyes widened. "Oh, no."

He grinned and nodded. "Oh, yes."

"I hope that your mother isn't wearing anything too fancy," she commented hoarsely before taking a sip of her coffee.

His grin widened. "It's Martha Rodgers we're talking about here, babe. What do you think?" He downed the rest of his juice and placed the empty glass on her tray with breakfast.

She shook her head and smiled before taking a bite out of the omelet – luckily not one of those Frankensteinish experiments that her husband loved to concoct.

"True. Let's hope your mother survives it," she added with a wince. Feeding Lizzy could sometimes get. . . _messy_.

He chuckled at that, busy gathering dirty towels and laundry from the en-suite bathroom.

"I'll relieve her later," he said, walking out of the bathroom towards their closet. Kate coughed a couple of times again, almost out of breath by the end of it. Her husband glanced at her, worry creasing his forehead.

"You okay?"

She nodded in reply. "Yeah, fine now."

He made his way to the bed, sitting down next to her. He placed the back of his hand against her forehead, moving it across her cheek.

"You're a little hot."

She smirked at him, an eyebrow raised. "Only a little?"

He huffed out a laugh, cupping her cheek. She leaned into his touch, placing her hand over his.

"You know what I mean - you may have a bit of a fever." His mouth curved into a grin. "You are a very, _very_ sexy woman, Mrs. Castle. Even if you're a little gross and sweaty right now."

She gasped and slapped his shoulder, unable to keep her smile under wraps. "Jeez, Castle, you know how to make a girl feel special."

"I'm kidding. You're always beautiful to me." He grinned and leaned towards her for a kiss. Kate jerked back, a hand against his chest.

"Rick, no. You're gonna get sick."

He only shrugged in response and darted in for a kiss, a hand at the back of her neck to reel her in.

"I'm willing to take my chances," he murmured against her mouth before pulling away.

Kate hummed and shook her head in reproach.

"Don't complain to me when you get sick."

He waved her off, getting up and making his way towards the door. "I won't get sick." He stopped by the door frame. "Besides, I'm an easy patient," he said seriously before leaving their room to check on his mother and daughter.

Kate nearly choked to death on a piece of toast.

* * *

_"Don't go. Stay with me," he whined, loosely wrapping an arm around her waist. Kate sighed and dropped her head into her hand, trying to quell her frustration and irritation._

_Her husband was such a child._

_But she did promise 'in sickness and in health'. Seriously, though, he was driving her mad. She was really trying to be the caring, sweet little wife who took care of her husband. And he was seriously taking advantage, milking it for everything that it was worth. _

___"Castle, I'm coming back," she huffed. "I just want to go get us something to eat."_

___He released his hold on her. "Oh, okay." She tried, but failed to hold onto her irritation when she glanced at him lying in bed; his hair tousled and his cheeks pink from the flu - he looked like a little boy._

___ She leaned down and pressed a kiss against his sweaty forehead. "You're burning up."_

___"Mm," he hummed, his eyes closed. _

___"I'll bring you some Tylenol."_

___He only nodded and clutched his pillow, burrowing further into the softness. She smiled softly and brushed a hand through his hair before getting up. Kate made her way through the office, dodging a few unopened boxes. They've only been married for three months and still had a few wedding gifts to open and a few boxes that still needed to be unpacked. _

_The telephone rang when she was in the kitchen. "Hello?"_

_"Hey, Kate!" Alexis' cheery greeting came through the line._

_A beaming smile spilled across the detective's face. _

_"Oh, hi sweetie. How are you?" _

_They missed her. Alexis was settled in an apartment somewhere near campus with some of her friends - all grown-up and independent._

_"I'm good, thanks. How are things? I've been trying to call Dad, but he's not picking up."_

_Kate let out a breath and leaned against the kitchen counter. "Things are good. Just. . . your dad isn't feeling well. I think he has the flu." _

_"Oh, no. Good luck." There was a amused lilt to the young woman's tone which Kate picked up on. She didn't necessarily liked it. _

_The detective sighed. "He's gonna milk it, isn't he?"_

_Alexis gave a laugh. "Oh, yeah. It is my dad we're talking about here, Kate."_

_The detective groaned and briefly closed her eyes. "Great." She let out a breath and pushed off the counter. "You wanna speak to him?"_

_"Nah, don't worry about it. I'll call him later." There was a pause. Kate could almost see the younger girl bite her lip - a habit she picked up from the detective. "I actually have some news about that guy I was telling you about."_

_Kate's mouth slid open into a grin. "Yeah?" She sat down at the kitchen stool, getting ready for a little girl talk. "Has he asked you out yet?"_

_Twenty minutes later, she walked back into the bedroom, a small smile fastened on her mouth. _

_"Where have you been?" Rick croaked, turning onto his back. He was pouting. Kate rolled her eyes and made her way to him. _

_"I made you a sandwich." She handed him a plate with a sandwich and placed a glass of juice on the bedside table. "I was talking to your daughter, by the way. She sends her regards."_

_His head snapped up. "How is she?" _

_"Fine. She's doing well." Kate sat down by his hip, her hand falling to his shin. "Great in fact. A cute guy in her Philosophy class which she has had her eye on for a while now, finally asked her out for coffee."_

_Rick narrowed his eyes, his mouth set in a grim line. "Philosophy class, huh? I don't trust him." He took a bite out of his sandwich._

_Kate frowned. "What? Why not?"_

_He shrugged. "Just. . . they play mind games."_

_She barked out a laugh and shook her head. "Richard Castle, you are ridiculous." _

_He glared at her. "Am I?" He finished off the sandwich and placed the empty plate on the bedside table._

_"Yes," she retorted emphatically. _

_He huffed and shook his head. "Just remember that I'm a sick man," he muttered with a scowl._

_Her mouth cracked open into a grin. Insufferable man. "Oh, believe me, honey, I haven't forgotten." _

_Largely, because he keeps reminding her._

_"Good." He slid down in bed again and opened his arms. "Cuddle with me?" _

_"Okay, but first, you need to take this." She held out the bottle of Tylenol to him. _

_"Then we can cuddle?" He whined._

_She exhaled a laugh. "Yes, Rick,_ then_ we can cuddle."_

_"Fine," he sighed and sat up. "Hit me."_

_She handed him two capsules. "If your fever doesn't break tonight, we're going to the doctor in the morning." She placed a palm against his hot, damp forehead; her face drawn in concern._

_Rick shook his head vigorously as he downed the pills. "No, no. I'm fine," he grunted. He wrapped a hand around her arm, pulling her towards him. "Now come lie down with me."_

_"Okay, okay," she said on a laugh, rolling her eyes. __Kate detangled from his hold and scooted across the bed towards her side. __"Just get don't me sick, Castle." _

_She curled on her side, her back to him as she waited for her husband to wrap himself around her. When he didn't make a move, she turned to look at him. He was staring at her, his arm suspended between them. Kate frowned and fully turned to face him._

_"Castle, what's wrong? I thought you wanted to cuddle."_

_He swallowed thickly, wincing at the soreness in his throat. "Maybe it's not such a good idea. I don't wanna get you sick," he croaked, his brow furrowing, his blue eyes wide with concern._

_Kate smiled softly and shifted closer to her husband. She lifted a hand and brushed it along his cheek, her fingers stroking his skin. __She leaned in and painted his lips with a featherlike kiss, her own mouth melting into a smile._

_"I'm willing to take the chance."_

* * *

She woke up to the sound of laughing - more like giggling. A little girl's giggling. Kate lifted her head and groaned - it felt heavy and thick and detached from her body. Her skin was flushed and her muscles and joints sore. She lifted a hand to her head, her hair tousled and in disarray from sleep. She glanced at the clock and bit back another groan when she saw that it was four in the afternoon. How on earth was she going to get any-

Just then her daughter scampered into their room, the little girl squealing with laughter. Kate grinned widely - Lizzy's head barely peeking out above the bed.

"Hey, baby," she cooed, her voice scratchy and rough. Lizzy turned to look at her mother, giving her a shy, toothy smile, her blue eyes glittering. She flung her hands around and hopped around in a silly little dance - the picture of mischief.

So much like Daddy.

A few moments later, Rick hurried into the room, seemingly concerned that his daughter was going to wake her mother.

"Come on, Sweet Pea," he whispered, unaware that Kate was already awake. Lizzy whipped around at the sound of her father's voice and shrieked, trying to dart away from him.

He caught his squealing, giggling daughter. "Shh, baby girl," he said with a grin. "We don't want to wake-"

"I'm up," Kate interrupted, sitting up. Rick whipped around, apologies already rolling off his tongue.

His wife just shook her head and waved him off. "I was a awake before you guys came in here." She threw off the covers and gingerly placed her feet on the ground. "What are you playing, by the way?"

"Hide and seek," he replied. "Honey, I don't think you should be out of bed."

Kate pinned him with an unimpressed look. "I'm getting out of bed. I can't lie here for another minute - no matter what you say." She picked up the glass of water on the bedside table and downed it.

He sighed and stepped closer, Lizzy still squirming in his arms. "How are you feeling?"

Kate just lifted a shoulder. "Kinda like death warmed up."

Rick placed a hand against her cheek and moved it up to her forehead. She was still burning up.

"Your fever still hasn't broken," he muttered unhappily. He put Lizzy down and the little girl immediately grabbed onto her mother's legs. She whimpered and held out her arms to her mother, seeking her undivided attention.

Kate brushed a hand through her daughter's dark, curly hair. "Oh, baby."

Lizzy's whines became insistent as bounced up against Kate's legs, her small still arms outstretched towards her mother; her hands opening and closing in supplication.

She hasn't seen her mother the whole day.

"Sweet Pea, Mommy doesn't feel so well." Rick bent down to pick up his daughter, but Kate placed a hand on his shoulder and shook her head.

The detective sighed and picked up her daughter. "Hey, sweetie." She hugged Lizzy, the little girl's small arms wrapping around her neck in a tight embrace. She burrowed into her mother's hold, her head resting on Kate's collarbone and one of her tiny hands tangling in a strand of her mother's hair.

Rick smiled at them, his eyes softening with affection. His heart always kinda melted at the sight of two of his girls sharing a moment.

"You want something to eat?"

Kate nodded, tightening her hold on Lizzy. "Yeah, I'm kind of hungry."

He guided her out of the room, a hand on the small of her back. "And you also need to get some Tylenol in your system."

"Mm." She turned around and handed their daughter to him. "Here - take her. I don't want her to get sick."

Before the little girl could whine in protest, Rick lifted her up onto his shoulders. Lizzy squealed and giggled heartily, her small face split open into a beaming, toothy smile as she rode on her father's shoulders.

Kate grinned at them, a hand covering one of Lizzy's small feet, playing with the little girl's toes. Lizzy squealed harder and tried to wriggle her foot away from her mother's tickling fingers.

"Where's your mom?"

He glanced at her, his mouth still parted in a smile. "She had an appointment with one of her old theater colleagues. She said she'll see us later tonight."

"Oh, okay. Did her outfit survive our daughter?"

Rick laughed. "Yeah, but only just."

She smiled. "Well, she was brave."

"Yeah, she was." They made their way through the living room towards the kitchen. "What do you want?"

Kate shrugged. "Just something light. Maybe a sandwich."

Rick nodded and lifted Lizzy from his shoulder, tossing the girl into the air once, twice, three times causing her to laugh like crazy.

"What do you say, baby? You wanna help me make something to eat?" He finally let her down to dart away towards the kitchen.

Kate followed her fast-moving daughter, wrapping her arms around herself, shivering despite the warm temperature. Rick came up beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

He pressed a few kisses in her hair. "You cold, babe?"

"Mm, little bit," she replied, snuggling into his body.

"I'll make you some hot chocolate," he murmured, placing another light kiss against her temple before releasing her.

She sat down at the kitchen counter, her head falling into her hand as her husband and daughter puttered around in the kitchen.

"God, I hate feeling like this," she moaned, her face hidden behind her hands.

After a few moments, Rick put a cup of hot chocolate in front of her. "I know, but this will make you feel better." He grinned at her, blue eyes glinting with little boy delight. "I even added marshmallows." He pointed that out as he leaned on the counter. "See?"

Something clattered loudly behind him, causing both of them to turn their attention to what their daughter was doing. She was sitting on the ground and playing with tuperware she got out of one of the lower cupboards. She sensed their gazes on her and lifted her head. When Lizzy spotted her parents she offered them a beaming grin, showing off her row of baby teeth. She threw out her arms and giggled at her parents.

Rick turned back to his wife, an eyebrow lifted and grinning. Kate rolled her eyes and shook her head, her hands wrapping around the warm cup.

She tipped her head to one side and offered him a weary smile. "Thanks for the hot chocolate."

"No problem, babe" he said, his smile widening. He pushed off the counter and walked to the refrigerator, looking for something to eat. "Kate, if you're not feeling better by the morning, we're going to the doctor."

She grunted. "No, I'm fine." She coughed a few times.

He only raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? Keep telling yourself that."

"I don't like going to the doctor," she moaned.

Rick let out a laugh. "Nobody does, honey. Welcome to the world of us mere mortals."

"Shut up, Castle," she muttered, her eyes a little glassy and cheeks pink.

He grinned at her. Infuriating man.

"At least it's not as bad as that time in the Hamptons. Remember that?"

She dropped her head again. "Ugh, don't remind me."

* * *

_"Are you sure it's not something you ate?"_

_"No," she groaned, hugging the cool porcelain bowl of misery. After a moment, she frantically struggled to bow over the toilet as another wave of nausea hit again. _

_Rick's eyes grew wide and he stepped into the bathroom towards her. "You're not pregnant, are you?"_

_The detective slowly turned around, leveling him with a withering glare. "No, Rick, I'm not."_

_"A-are you sure?" He asked tentatively. Not that he would be upset if she was, but they've only been married for about ten months and frankly, they weren't ready to start on little Castle babies just yet._

_Kate narrowed her eyes, her jaw clenching in frustration._ "Yes,_ I'm positive. Jeez. We've only been married for like ten months."_

_He sighed, a little relieved. "Okay, okay." His mouth twitched in amusement as he moved closer. "And it's ten months, one week and. . . three days to be exact, Mrs. Castle."_

_Kate rolled her eyes and laughed, the sound hoarse. "You're such a sap."_

_The twitch of his lips grew into a full-blown grin. "You love it."_

_"I do."_

_A moment later, Kate groaned and bent over the bowl of agony again. Rick winced in sympathy and walked over to the basin to get a washcloth. __They thought a romantic getaway to the Hamptons would just be the thing after a long, hard week at work. __And the perfect opportunity to make up for a week without sex. _

_Unfortunately, however, a bad case of the flu caught up with one of them._

_"God, I hate this," she mumbled, hugging the toilet. _

_Rick sighed and sat down next to her, patting the wet washcloth over her face. "I know, honey." He bent down and brushed a hand over her back. "Maybe we should get you to a doctor."_

_She leaned back against the tub, her knees drawn and her head tipped upward. She closed her eyes and shook her head._

_"No. I'll be okay."_

_"You sure?" __He mimicked her position, trailing a hand over her cheek and tucking a piece of unruly hair behind her ear._

_"Yeah." Kate nodded and turned her head in his direction, her eyes sliding open. "I'm sorry," she said softly after a moment._

_Rick frowned. "What? Why?"_

_She offered him a tired lift of her lips. "For ruining our romantic getaway."_

_He breathed out a laugh and edged closer to his wife, his arm coming around her shoulders. He pressed a kiss against her temple and pulled her small frame further into his hold._

_"You have nothing to apologize for." His mouth curled into a grin. "I see a bright future for us filled with romantic getaways and great, hot, animal-sex."_

_Laughter bubbled out of Kate, bright and beaming, setting her features alight. Rick stared at his wife - the stunning arch of her cheekbones, the strong, defined set of her jaw, the graceful slope of her nose. His eyes tripped down to her mouth. Her sensual, gorgeous lips which were now drawn open in joy, emitting the sound of her carefree laughter._

_He almost unconsciously lifted a hand to her face, his fingers tracing the hard bone of her chin and jaw._

_"God, you're beautiful," he exhaled, the words whooshing out of his lungs. __Kate startled and looked at him, her mouth still parted, the laughter dancing behind the green of her eyes. Her wide smile muted into a shy curl of her mouth. _

_"Well, I don't feel too attractive now," she said, ducking her head, timid and suddenly self-conscious. _

_He drew both his arms around her and tugged her against his chest a little awkwardly, hauling her into his lap._

_"Babe, you could be wearing a wet paper bag and you'd still be the most beautiful woman to me."_

_She puffed out a laugh, her breath wafting over the skin of his neck. "Charmer."_

_His mouth split open into a grin against her temple. "Oh, you love it."_

_"I do," Kate admitted._

_He pulled away slightly and cupped her face. "Love you."_

_"Love you too."_

_He planted a soft kiss against her lips. "In sickness and in health."_

* * *

"I feel better," Kate said before burrowing underneath the blankets.

Rick stepped out of the bathroom and flicked off the light, smiling softly at his wife.

"Yeah?" He got in and pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her small frame.

Kate snuggled into his body, her head coming to rest on his chest.

"Mm-hmm. Don't need to go to the doctor tomorrow."

Rick pursed his lips in an effort not to smile. Kate Castle and doctors were definitely _not_ friends.

"You sure?" His combed his fingers through her hair in soothing, hypnotizing patterns. Her body grew heavy with sleep.

"Yeah, I feel much better," she sighed.

"Good, I'm glad." He pressed a kiss against the top of her head. "You have to admit - I make a pretty good nurse."

She huffed out a laugh, a small, dainty emission of sound. "You sure do, Castle. Just a pity we don't have a sexy nurse outfit for you."

He chuckled, a deep rumble vibrating throughout his body right into hers.

"We could always make a plan."

She smiled. "Mm. We sure can." Kate suddenly lifted her head, her mouth slowly curling into a feline smile, her eyes dancing. "Do you still have that space cowboy outfit?"

Rick's brow furrowed. "Yeah. Why?"

She bit her lip, teasingly lifting an eyebrow. "'Cause that might just be what the doctor ordered. It's sexy," she husked, her gaze dropping to his mouth.

He smiled, a hand sweeping down her back. "Oh, yeah?"

She nodded. "Mm-hmm."

"You want me to try it on for you?" He wriggled his eyebrows.

"Mm, yes, please."

He breathed out a laugh. "It's a deal, but on one condition."

"What?"

"If you agree to break out your Naughty Nurse outfit the next time I get sick."

Her mouth slowly curved into a wide smile. "Deal." She pressed a kiss against his mouth, painting his lips with hers.

After they broke apart, Rick faked a coughed. "Actually, I kinda feel something coming on."

She swatted his chest and laughed. "Fat chance, Casanova." She rolled her eyes and turned on her side, her back pressed against him.

"Oh, come on, Kate! It might be serious."

She shook her head, unable to stop the smile from taking over her features. "Get the light, Rick."

He switched off the light and curled up against her, dwarfing her body with his larger one; his arm enclosing around her waist like a band, their hands intertwining.

"In sickness and in health, Mrs. Castle. In sickness and in health," he muttered into her ear.

She lifted his hand to her mouth, letting her lips gently travel over the hard ridges of his knuckles.

"Yes, Mr. Castle. For better or worse."

[][][]

_I'll stay right here, it's where I'll always belong_

_Tied with your arms_

_Days like this I wish the sun wouldn't set_

_I don't wanna forget_

* * *

**A/N: I struggled with this one and I'm not entirely happy with it. But, more regular writing will let this rustiness dissipate. Anyway, I hope it was enjoyable.**

**Reviews are like magic.**

**Lyrics at the end: From The After's song 'Ocean Wide'. **


	55. Chapter 55

**A/N: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews so far, I truly appreciate it. Now this chapter just kinda popped into my head today. Just a funny little chapter which includes the boys - I kinda missed them. The next chapter will follow from this one.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Yada, yada, yada - I own nothing.**

* * *

**Chapter 55 - Movember**

"But it's Movember, Kate!"

She shot him a look, raising an elegant eyebrow. "Is that your excuse for _that_, Castle?" She gestured towards his upper lip, her face twisting in disdain. He was proudly sporting a horseshoe/rock-star-styled moustache.

His wife, however, wasn't really a fan.

"Hey, I've worked hard on this killer moustache."

Kate rolled her eyes and poured herself a cup of coffee; her first and certainly not last cup of the day. That is if her husband didn't drive to alcohol before that.

"Rick, you look like a Hell's Angels biker."

He grinned, his eyes glittering with excitement, a hand coming up to stroke the ridiculous-looking patch of hair.

"Really?"

Kate sighed – that wasn't meant as a compliment. "Or more like a sad cowboy."

He shrugged. "Eh, I'll take that too."

"You're not going like that to the interview today."

He frowned. "What? Why not?"

She sighed and sank down into a chair, her eyes on the newspaper. She had a few minutes to enjoy her coffee and page through the paper. If her husband would allow it, of course.

"Because, Castle, I don't want them to think Lizzy's father is some kind of. . ." She glanced at him again, her face twisting. _"-hooligan."_

He shook his head, his features morphing into a grin; a conceited little lift of his mouth.

"They won't, Kate. They know who I am. Trust me."

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes, her mouth twitching in amusement. Doesn't he hear himself? It was tiring sometimes, but mostly a little adorable.

Damn him and his twinkling eyes.

"Still, just at least trim it." He was wearing an unhappy pout. Kate bit her lip, turning her best doe-eyed look on him. He could never resist her doe eyes and fluttering eyelashes.

_Men._

"Please, honey. For me," she implored, her voice turning soft; her eyes big and luminous. "If not for me then at least for your daughter."

His resolve broke - he could never ever deny her when she looked at him like that. Or if she brought his daughter(s) into the equation.

Damn.

His women were going to be the end of him.

"Okay, fine. I'll trim it," he muttered, still wearing a pout. Kate smiled, wide and beautiful. She got up and walked towards her husband.

"Thank you," she murmured, stepping into the cove of his body and pressing a lingering kiss against his mouth.

He was still wearing a sulky expression when they broke apart. "You know that I'm going to lose the bet Esposito, Ryan and I made, right?"

Kate rolled her eyes, her hands stroking up and down his chest. "Oh please, do you really think Lanie will have a lot of patience for Espo's ridiculous goatee? And Ryan? Can he _even_ grow facial hair?"

Rick barked out a laugh. "That was harsh _and_ incorrect. I've seen photos of Ryan sporting impressive beards. Don't underestimate that Irish-man." She grinned at that. "And Espo is _very_ competitive. He'll do anything to win, even if it means risking the wrath of his wife."

Kate sighed and shook her head, trying, but failing to keep her smile under control. "Okay, how about this?" He lifted an eyebrow and cocked his head in interest.

"If you trim your. . . whatever that is today for the interview at the preschool, then you have my permission to grow a beard."

His eyes lit up immediately. "Yeah?"

She puffed out a laugh. "Yes, Castle."

"Cool. You sure?"

Kate nodded. "I think it will suit you."

He grinned like a little boy. "I've always wanted to grow a beard, but I didn't think that you'd like it."

"I think you'll look sexy."

He lifted an eyebrow, teasing her with his dancing blue eyes. "Oh, is that so?" He murmured, drawing her close again, his hands bracketing her waist, thumbs skirting over her hipbones.

"Mm-hmm." She kissed him again, sucking on his bottom lip and sweeping her tongue along his upper lip, darting it into his mouth before eventually breaking the kiss.

"Besides," she said with a feral, predatory look in her eye as she moved away from him. "I've always wanted to know how a beard would feel between my thighs."

His jaw grew slack, his eyes almost bulging out of his head as he stared after his laughing wife.

Good lord.

The woman _was_ going to kill him.

* * *

"Yo, Beckett, we got the financials back."

Kate glanced towards Esposito and had to, for the umpteenth time that day, suppress her smile. Esposito and Ryan were sporting even more ridiculous facial hair arrangements than her husband, clearly taking this competition way too seriously. The Hispanic detective was sporting an elaborate goatee ala Robert Downey jr. while his partner was going for a 'porn star'/Magnum PI-look.

Someone was clearly a Tom Selleck-fan.

She schooled her features. "Yeah? What did you find."

"The vic made a withdrawal of ten grand a day before he was murdered."

She turned back to the murder board, her face drawn in concentration, a hand against her mouth. "Okay, okay. We didn't find the money. So, we can assume the killer took it."

"That's what I thought."

"Ryan." The Irish detective got up from his desk.

"Yeah?"

"Did you get anything from surveillance yet?"

He came to them before the murder board. "No, not yet, but I did talk to his wife and she told me that Carter had a standing appointment on Thursdays at 17h00 with his therapist."

Kate's brow furrowed, her attention turning back to the timeline on the murder board. "He died around six, six-thirty. So, the therapist might have been the last person to have seen him alive."

"Or the first person to have seen him dead," Esposito said, arching his eyebrows.

Ryan was stroking his moustache in thought. "Yeah, yeah. Maybe the therapist blackmailed Carter about some deep-seated secret he had and demanded ten thousand dollars-"

"-So he agrees to bring the therapist the money, but then the therapist gets greedy and demands more-" Esposito added.

"-Which leads to an argument and eventually with our vic with a bashed-in head."

They turned to her, grinning like little boys; clearly impressed with their theory-building skills.

"Thank you, Castle, for that. Who needs proof?" Kate shot back sarcastically.

"It's plausible," Ryan countered, pouting slightly.

_"Proof,_ guys. We need _proof."_

"Ah, who needs proof when there's a good story?"

The three detectives swung around and was met by Rick Castle Theory-Builder Extroadinaire. He was grinning at them while pushing along the stroller with his sleeping daughter in it. Kate rolled her eyes, her mouth curving into a smile. She was always happy to see him, them - her little family.

"Of course that's what you would say. What's next? The CIA or the mob did it, right?" Kate said, shaking her head at him.

He shrugged and put a hand on her hip, guiding her to him. "Actually, that's not bad, but I'd prefer the butler," he said, giving her a smile.

"They didn't have one," Ryan pointed out unnecessarily.

"Eh, semantics." Rick waved him off, his eyes on Kate anyway. "Hi."

"Hi," she returned, coyly biting her lip. His smile grew at that adorable habit his wife had. He darted in for a quick peck on the lips, soft and familiar.

She lifted a hand to his mouth, stroking the skin beside it. "I see you trimmed it."

"Told you I would," he murmured, going in for another kiss, a longer one this time. Behind them, someone loudly and deliberately cleared their throat. The two broke apart and turned around.

"You guys need a room or something?" Esposito jibed, his mouth creasing into a lopsided grin.

"Shut up, Espo," Kate muttered, bending down to get a better look at her sleeping daughter.

She swept a hand over the girl's face, trying to brush the curly bangs off her forehead. The little girl slowly opened her eyes, unfocused as it latched onto her mother. When she saw Kate, Lizzy immediately held out her arms and stretched out towards her mother. Kate smiled, undid the clasps and picked her daughter up out of the stroller. Lizzy yawned and rubbed her bleary eyes before burrowing into her mother.

The two other detectives moved closer, immediately growing softer at the sight of Lizzy.

"_Hola chiquita_," Esposito said quietly to the little girl, grasping one of her small feet and jiggling it. She rewarded him with a small puff of a giggle. "You're a beautiful girl, aren't you?"

"She's getting big," Ryan commented, turning his attention to the Castles' daughter. "Hey Lizzy, you have to come visit Colin and Liam sometime. They miss you, Squirt."

Kate smiled at her partner. "We'll set up a play-date."

"Boys, it's good to see you too," Rick greeted boisterously, throwing his arms around their shoulders.

"Hey, man."

"What's up, bro?"

The men greeted each other with elaborate handshakes and manly one-armed hugs.

"Wow, check out those mo's. Impressive guys," Rick commented. "Very Boogie Nights," he said to Ryan before turning to Esposito, a teasing glint flickering across his features. "And Desperado."

Both men frowned, clearly taking offense.

"Boogie Nights?"

"Desperado?" They said simultaneously, glaring at the writer.

Rick grinned at them, loving the fact that he could still get under their respective skins. He lifted his hands defensively.

"Hey, that was meant as compliments."

The Hispanic detective huffed. "Yeah, right. At least we'll win the bet. Don't what you've got going on with that vanilla 'stache, bro, but it ain't gonna win any rewards."

Ryan nodded, his mouth sliding open into a cocky grin underneath the impressive patch of hair covering his upper lip.

"Just remember our bet, Castle. It's either the Ferrari for a week or Yankees box tickets."

Kate's brow furrowed. "I thought you were a Red Sox fan, Ryan." She shifted Lizzy to her other hip, trailing a hand down her back.

He shrugged. "I am, but it doesn't mean I don't enjoy going to an odd baseball game in a box that's got that little fridge stuffed with goodies."

"Guys, guys, don't get ahead of yourselves," Rick said with a cunning curl of his lips. "This competition is _far_ from over."

"Is that so?" Esposito asked, crossing his arms across his puffed-out chest.

"Oh, yeah. My wife has given me permission to grow a beard."

The other two men's faces fell comically.

"Would your wives allow that?" He glanced at Kate, winking at her. She rolled her eyes and took that as her cue to leave them to their ridiculous bet; her little girl seemed hungry anyway.

Ryan narrowed his eyes, stepping closer to the writer. "So, you wanna make this interesting, huh, Writer Boy? Okay, okay - two can play this game."

Rick lifted his eyebrows. "Is that a challenge?"

The Irish detective's features hardened into determination. "Damn straight it is. Espos, you in?" When his partner did not answer immediately, Ryan turned to look at him, eyebrows raised in question.

Esposito was giving him a sheepish smile, rubbing a hand at the back of his neck. "Nah, man, I. . . Lanie's not gonna be cool with that. She's already not happy with this." He gestured to his creative goatee.

Ryan resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Okay, fine." He turned back to the writer. "Looks like it's just you and me, Writer Boy."

Rick clenched his jaw, taking a step closer to the shorter detective. "Bring it on, Honey Milk. I'm gonna bury you," he growled menacingly.

"Oh, yeah? Man, you don't know me. You don't know what I'm capable of." Ryan took a step closer as well in an effort to get into the writer's face.

Esposito cleared his throat. "Guys, you probably need a new set of rules." The other men turned to look at him, considering his suggestion for a moment and nodded.

"Yeah, okay," Rick said, leaning back and taking a seat on his wife's desk, cradling his chin in thought. "Okay, how about this?-"

"Castle, come on! We have to go," Kate called, stepping out of the the break room after giving Lizzy a bottle of milk. He whipped around and immediately scampered off towards his wife, grabbing the stroller along the way.

"Guys, I'll be back in an hour, two hours at the most. Follow up on the therapist and try to figure out where our vic was in that window of time."

"Sure thing, boss."

Ryan nodded. "On it, Beckett."

Before they were out of sight, Rick turned back.

"I'll call you later - work out all the details," he said to Ryan. He gave the other men two thumbs up, grinning like a little boy.

"Yeah, that's fine man," Ryan called back amicably, lifting a hand in greeting.

"See you, bro," Esposito greeted.

Kate just sighed and shook her head at her daughter who was more interested in her mother's necklace. She snagged her husband's hand to drag him into the elevator.

"You ready for this?"

He was still grinning like a fool. "Oh, yeah, so ready. I'm gonna crush him."

She shot him a look. "I meant the interview, Castle."

He whipped his head to her. "Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure." He gave her a goofy smile and leaned in for a quick kiss. After a quiet moment, he lifted a hand to his face and stroked it along his chin and cheeks.

"What about an Abe Lincoln beard?" He mused before turning to her with lit up eyes. "Ooh, or how about that guy from the _Hunger Games_? What was his name? Seneca or something. That was a pretty awesome beard. Am I right?"

Kate let out a breath and drop her head into her hand.

What on earth has she done?

_[][][]_

_If you start me up (uh) _

_Kick on the starter give it all you got, you got, you got_

_I can't compete with riders in the other heat, yeah yeah_

_I'll make a grown man cry,_

_I'll make a grown man give it a shot_

* * *

**A/N: I really enjoyed writing this - especially the banter between Castle and the boys. Hopefully, it was enjoyable for you too.**_  
_

**Review please - I crave it.**

**Lyrics at the end: A Glee mash-up of 'Start me Up' and 'Living on a prayer'.**


	56. Chapter 56

**A/N: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews for the previous chapters - you guys are the best!**

**But for the one person (Peter Gunn) who left me a really weird and hostile review after the previous chapter: what the hell was that all about? Damn, if you hate the show so much, why the hell are you still watching it? Nobody is forcing you. ****A word of advice: don't write reviews when you are pissed off. Or experiencing PMS. Next time, at least have the guts to log in so that I can engage with you in a PM. I'm not going to reply to you in a public forum. **

**Aaaannyway, enjoy this piece of fluff! I also wanted to try out a Christmas-type fic and hopefully this is decent.**

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. I'm only borrowing the characters. And yes, Marlowe is still a genius in my opinion. **

* * *

**Chapter 56 - A Merry Little Christmas**

"Hey, I found Cookie Angel!" Rick called out enthusiastically, holding up the self-made ornament. They were busy decorating the massive Christmas tree and turning the loft into a sparkly, glittery, spectacular Winter Wonderland.

Alexis chuckled and shook her head as she climbed down the ladder. "Dad, maybe you should get rid of that thing. It's getting kinda gross."

His head snapped up, his eyes growing wide. "What? Get rid of Cookie Angel? Never. You made this for me when you were seven with your chubby little hands." He grinned at her, a twinkle in his blue eyes. "Remember?"

The young woman offered him a soft, wistful smile. "Yeah, Dad, I do." She stepped closer, bending down to take the little creation from him. "But soon Lizzy will be the one to bring you self-made Christmas decorations."

Rick's brow furrowed, his eyes watching his eldest carefully. He reached out a hand and snagged her arm. "Alexis, you still form part of this family. Nobody will ever take replace-"

But the red-head's mouth curved widely and she shook her head. "I know, Dad. Don't worry, I know that. We're a family. I'm just saying that maybe it's time to start _new_ traditions." With that she leaned down and kissed his bearded cheek before heading upstairs.

Castle sat there, letting his daughter's words play in his mind.

'_New traditions'_.

In the past, he would have protested against such an idea, calling it preposterous and a little paradoxical, but experience has taught him to always expect something new.

* * *

_She was making herself a cup of coffee with his fancy espresso machine, tired and a feeling a little somber for being at the precinct on Christmas Eve. But, she meant what she had told him - it was her tradition and it was important._

_"You're doing it wrong."_

_Kate startled and whipped around at the sound of his voice. He was smirking at her as he stood there at the break room door, his blue eyes regarding her tenderly._

_Her mouth involuntarily slid into a wide smile, her delight quantified in the lift of her lips. _

_"Castle, what are doing here?" _

_He shrugged, giving her a lopsided grin. "Making new traditions." He had a bag with him and lifted it onto the counter. "I thought that maybe you needed some Christmas cheer. . . and food." He briefly turned back to her, wriggling his eyebrows and still grinning like a little boy before taking out the contents of the bag. _

_Kate was rooted to the spot and__ stared at her writer as he dug out various portions of a Christmas feast - from the starter to dessert. And __of course, eggnogg. __She shook her head and breathed out a laugh. This man. This sweet, adorable, wonderful man._

_The man she loved._

_"Kate, did you hear me?" He asked, wearing a bemused smile._

_Huh. __She must have zoned out with a goofy grin on her face. _

_"Uh, what?"_

_He cocked his head to the side and watched for a moment, his blue eyes glittering. "Do you want some eggnogg?"_

_She nodded, coming to stand next to him. "Yeah, please."_

_He poured some into a coffee cup and handed it to her. "Here you go. It's my mother's secret recipe. In other words - twice as much alcohol. A word of advice: don't drink too quickly," he said with a wink._

_She took the cup from him, their fingers lingering against each other. She smiled at him, the special one that she reserved for him, the one that flooded her eyes with light. _

_"Thanks." __However, that smile slowly faded, her eyes falling away as she started to think about his presence meant. _

_What sacrifices he had to make._

_"Rick, what about Christmas Eve with Alexis and Martha?" She lifted her eyes to him, a little vulnerable and uncertain. "With your family?"_

_He looked at her, his brow creasing. "Kate, you_ are_ family and this is our first Christmas together." He placed his hands on her upper arms, squeezing gently and pulling her closer. "I want to spend it with you."_

_"But do you really want to spend it here at the precinct?"_

_He nodded. "Yes, as long as I get to spend it with you." __Kate sighed and flickered her eyes downward, still not entirely convinced. "This is important to you, so it's important to me."_

_Her gaze snapped back to him, her mouth falling open. Before Rick could process what was happening, she had her arms around his neck, her body pressed tightly against his._

_"I love you," she sighed against his skin, her face buried in his neck. His heart stuttered - that was the first time she said the words out loud. Kate pulled back to look at him, her mouth splayed in a bright smile, her hands framing his face. _

_"I love you."_

_His smile matched hers, wide and beaming, reaching his eyes. He touched her face, cradling her cheek and caressing his thumb over the hard ridge of her jaw bone. _

_"I love you too. So much." He tilted his head towards her and touched his lips to the corner of her mouth, meeting her lips in a whisper of a kiss. _

_Kate broke away from his mouth and walked her lips across his cheek, nuzzling her nose into his skin. _

_"Castle," she murmured, her breath washing over his cheek. _

_"Mm?" _

_She smiled, her teeth bared against his skin. "You forgot the mistletoe."_

_He chuckled, the sound rumbling out of his chest, sending the vibrations into her body. "Nah-uh, you are mistaken, my dear detective." He pulled back slightly, grinning like a little boy, his eyes creasing adorably. _

_Kate lifted her eyebrows in question, biting her lip. "Oh, really?"_

_He nodded before taking out the mistletoe from his inside jacket pocket. "See? Now Christmas is complete." He lifted the branch above their heads._

_"Merry Christmas, Kate."_

_She let out a single note of laughter. "Merry Christmas." _

_And with that, Rick Castle finally got to kiss Kate Beckett under a mistletoe. _

* * *

Rick was snapped out of his nostalgia when the front door burst open with his wife and youngest daughter coming through with bags of Christmas shopping in tow. Lizzy was hanging onto her mother's empty hand, bouncing up and down with a little too much energy.

"Hey, guys. Or rather girls," Rick greeted them with a large smile, getting up from the floor. When Lizzy spotted her father, she squealed and scampered towards him.

He grinned and bent down, catching her as she launched herself into his arms, chanting 'Dada, dada'.

"Hey, baby girl. You have fun?" He nuzzled her neck and blew raspberries against her neck, making the little girl shriek in giggles. She was only one fan of her father's beard.

Kate was also one - especially when he was trailing his mouth down her body, igniting her skin with the scratch of his rough beard. . . Hot damn.

"So, how far did you get with the decorating?"

He glanced around and shrugged, shifting Lizzy in his arms. "We're almost done with the tree. Just waiting for you to complete the final touches." He looked at her, wriggling his eyebrows and grinning.

He was such a little boy sometimes.

Kate returned the smile, bags still in her hands. "It looks great so far, honey." She walked past him towards their room, but before she could get far, he snatched her arm with his free hand.

"Whoa, Mrs. Castle, where are you going?"

She frowned in confusion. He only tilted his head upward, gesturing towards the mistletoe hanging from the ceiling. Kate followed his line of sight and puffed out a laugh when she spotted it. She lowered the packages to the floor and moved into the cradle of his arms where their daughter was already kept safe.

"Merry Christmas, Mr. Castle," she whispered before brushing her mouth against his, a hand rubbing along his bearded cheek.

She _really_ did love it.

His lips slipped into a muted smile as they parted, foreheads brushing and their daughter's little body in the middle of all of the joy.

"Merry Christmas, Mrs. Castle."

* * *

_She was baking him - correction_ them_ - cookies. In his apartment on the day before Christmas. The day she always kept her own tradition - working on Christmas Eve, keeping vigil over the city she loved. But-_

_she had a family now. __And it was time to start new traditions. So, here she is baking Castle, Alexis and Martha Christmas cookies with her mother's recipe. Complete in Christmas attire - a cute green and red apron and a Santa-hat. She heard the the front door open and smoothed down her apron, biting her lip in excitement and nervousness. _

_He came through the door, bags in hand and head down. She heard his heavy sigh and watched him from the kitchen; he was frowning, seemingly deep in thought. _

_"Mother!" He called out, dropping the shopping bags by the table at the door. _

_Kate smiled, holding a few fingers to her smiling lips. __"She isn't here, Castle."_

_She stepped out from the kitchen counter, her hands clasped casually behind her back; a clever smile dancing around in her eyes. __His head snapped up, his mouth falling open in shock. _

_"Kate? W-what are you doing here?" He tracked his eyes up and down her body, his mouth curving. "Dressed like an elf."_

_She lifted a shoulder, her mouth curving broadly. "I'm baking."_

_"Baking?"_

_Her lips stretched out, revealing her row of pearly whites. "Yeah. I'm baking you guys some Christmas cookies."_

_He offered her a cheek-splitting grin that flickered in his eyes. "Yeah?"_

_She laughed and nodded. "Mm-hmm. And they're delicious. It's m__y mom's special recipe._"

_At that, the smile slid off his face and he dropped his eyes, shifting uncomfortably on his feet. Kate's own smile slowly faded, her forehead creasing in worry and sudden insecurity. _

_Did she cross a line somehow?_

_She slowly rounded the kitchen counter, coming to stand a couple of steps away from him. ____"Unless that's a problem, Rick."_

___His eyes flashed to hers again and he moved towards her. "No, no," he said, reaching out a hand to her arm, circling her small, bony wrist with his fingers. "Of course not. I_ love___ having you here in my home."_

___She tilted her head sideways and regarded him with dark, knowing eyes. "Then what is this hesitation about?"_

___He sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face. "Just. . . what about your tradition, Kate?" He murmured, watching her with worried blue eyes._

___Kate's mouth parted little-by-little, her features growing tender. She moved into his personal space, their bodies only inches apart, heat sparking between them._

___"I'm making new ones."_

___"You sure?" _

___She breathed out a light laugh, brushing a hand up his chest, her fingers splaying over his collarbone; feather-light and warm. _

___"Yes, Rick, I'm sure."_

___At that, his face cracked open into a beaming, goofy grin, pinning his cheeks to then opposite ends of his face. _

___"Okay, great. That's. . . great," he said before pulling her closer for a kiss. A soft, slow and thorough exploration of her mouth. _

___He rested his forehead against hers, smiling softly. "So, cookies, huh?"_

___Kate sang out a single note of laughter, a melody of joy and amusement. She pulled out of his arms, tangling her hand with his and dragging him along to the oven where the promised goods awaited._

___"Yes, Castle, I baked you cookies." She turned towards him, eyebrows raised, trying to reign in her mirth. "Are you really that surprised?"_

___He lifted a shoulder. "Well, I know you can cook, detective, but seeing you here baking in this cute little apron-" He flashed her a crooked, devilish grin. "-call me crazy, but it's kind of arousing."_

___"Oh my god, are you kidding me?" She burst out around a laugh. "Not cute or adorable or sweet, but arousing."_

___"Oh, you have no idea how much." He crowded her, his large presence invading her smaller frame. "Kate, I don't think you fully comprehend how much seeing you here in my kitchen, cooking and baking, turns me on," he said, his voice like honey; smooth and rich. _

___She quirked an eyebrow, slowly pulling her bottom lip into her mouth, knowing that his eyes would automatically be drawn there. _

___"Is that so?"_

___He grinned and nodded slowly. "Oh, yeah. Only things missing - you being barefoot and pregnant." He regretted the words the moment they rolled off his tongue._

___Shiiiiit._

___Kate tensed and blanched, her eyes growing wide. Rick's mouth dropped open, his eyes as big as saucers. _

___Big, stupid mouth. _

___"Uh, I- Kate, that was- I-" he bumbled. _

___Kate rolled her eyes, her lips lifting. "Castle, relax." She pressed a few fingers against his mouth. "Let's chalk it up to a Freudian slip, 'kay?"_

___He breathed out a sigh. "Yeah, okay." He gave her a little boy grin, wrapping his arms around her waist. "You are the best girlfriend. Ever."_

___She smiled and laced her arms around his neck, clasping her hands at the back of his head. "Mm, and don't you forget it," she murmured before pressing soft kiss against his mouth. She pulled back and trailed a hand down his arm, engaging her hand into his._

___"Now, come on. I could use some help with the last batch."_

* * *

"The tree looks beautiful."

Kate stepped in behind her husband and wrapped her arms around him, binding them around his torso while resting her chin on his shoulder. It was quiet now. Alexis was lounging next to her baby sister, reading a book and unconsciously combing her hand through Lizzy dark, curly hair. The youngest Castle was asleep, the lights from the Christmas tree playing over her little-girl features. She was completely conked out - too much excitement in one night, including meeting Santa Claus.

Who she ran away from, crying and screaming her lungs out.

It took her mother half an hour to calm her down and bring her back to a Santa-less Christmas-celebration. Her father, of course, was sporting a massive pout because of that - nobody had ever cried before when he was Santa.

"Yeah, it does," he murmured. After a moment, her turned and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pressing a kiss against the temple.

He smiled, only a small, lopsided tilt of his lips. Nostalgia, sentiment and memories of Christmases gone bye resting on the planes of his face. Rick covered her smaller hands on his chest with his ones, tracing her wedding band with his fingers.

He loved her.

The tide of that feeling swelled inside of him, crashing around in his heart like waves. He loved her and his family.

All his girls.

Rick wrapped his arms around his wife, dusting his lips over the crown of her head. Without heels, she squeezed in under his chin - the perfect fit.

"You like your gift?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I love it. Thanks," she murmured, her breath fanning out against his skin. She pulled back slightly to catch his gaze. "You?"

His mouth drifted open into a wide smile. "Yes, it's great. Santa was generous to me this year. I must have been a good boy." Rick wriggled his eyebrows, his wide smile turning into a smirk.

Kate lifted an eyebrow as if to say _is that so? _She dropped her eyes to his mouth, her hands tracking up his chest, her fingers playing with the buttons on his dress shirt.

She stepped closer, bumping her nose lightly into his cheek, walking her lips up his jaw, enjoying the rough scratch of his beard against her lips.

"Well, Mr. Castle, if you continue to be a good boy, maybe Santa has another gift for you in store later tonight," she purred into his ear, her lips touching his earlobe.

He choked out a shaky breath, his body humming underneath her seduction. His hands flexed around her waist as he pulled her closer to his body.

"I'll be anything you want, Mrs. Castle," he growled, his voice saturated with dark arousal. Before Kate could reply, Alexis called out:

"Hey, it's snowing!"

With that, they were snapped out of their semi-foreplay. Oops. Gotta keep in mind that the kids were present.

"Come and have a look," the red-head said excitedly, beckoning them over to the window. Lizzy was sitting up on the couch, her hair falling messily around her rosy cheeks as she rubbed at her bleary eyes. After a moment, she slowly slid off the couch - butt-up - and held out her arms for one of her parents to pick her up.

"Momma, up." She opened and closed her small hands in request. "_Uppie._"

Kate huffed out a laugh, a single, soft note of affectionate amusement. She disentangled from her husband's hold and moved towards her daughter, bending down and picking her up.

"You wanna see the snow, baby." Lizzy's only answer was to bury her face in her mother's neck, burrowing further into Kate's embrace. The little girl let out a quiet sigh and repeatedly twirled her small fingers around Kate's hair.

"Wow, it's beautiful," Alexis commented.

Rick nodded, before dropping his arm around his oldest daughter's shoulders and pulling her to him. "Yeah, it is."

He turned his eyes to Kate, his lips drawn into a fond smile, everything in him softening. "Let's go to the park tomorrow - make some snowmen. What do you say?"

She returned a smile, her eyes instinctively drifting back to Lizzy. "Sounds fun. Alexis, you in?"

The young woman grinned. "Sure! Sounds great. How about we go ice skating too?"

Rick groaned while Kate chuckled.

"Do we really have to?" Rick asked with a heavy sigh, his shoulders drooping.

"Oh come on, Castle, I wanna see your moves." Her body gravitated towards his, her head falling against his shoulder. "Besides, it could become a new Castle family tradition."

"Yeah," Alexis supported enthusiastically.

Rick chuckled lightly before wrapping an arm around Kate's shoulders. He pressed a kiss against her temple, dancing his lips over her skin.

"I'd like that. Well, this is indeed a merry Christmas."

_[] [] []_

_Through the years _

_We all will be together_

_If the Fates allow_

_Hang a shining star upon the highest bough._

_And have yourself A merry little Christmas now_

* * *

**A/N: Well, I hope that was enjoyable. I kinda struggled with it, but at least it's out there. **

**Thanks for reading! Please review while you're at it.**

**Title and lyrics: I'm sure everyone is familiar with the wonderful 'Have yourself a Merry little Christmas'. **

**Merry Christmas to all and God bless.**

** ;-)**


	57. Chapter 57

**A/N: Happy (belated) New Year to all! Thank you for the wonderful support and reviews I have received for this story. It's great to see that people still enjoy this story.**

**This chapter will introduce a new story line which I think everyone will be excited about. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: They're not mine and will never be. **

* * *

**Chapter 57 - Resolutions**

"Five!"

He bracketed her waist with his hands, spanning his fingers over her rib cage.

"Four!"

Kate smiled at him, running her hands up to his arms, resting them on his biceps.

"Three!"

He pulled her closer, sliding his arms fully around her waist, cradling her in the circle of his arms.

"Two!"

He touched his forehead to hers, a smile dawning over his face.

"One!"

The writer brushed his mouth over the peak of his wife's cheekbone up to her ear and whispered:

"Happy New Year."

She leaned closer, turning her head towards him and nudged her nose against his cheek. She danced her lips to the corner of his mouth, skimming his skin gently like raindrops falling on the ground.

"Happy New Year," she breathed, pressing her mouth to his in a soft kiss. Kate looped her arms around his neck, her body hovering close to his.

He pulled back slightly and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, his thumb kissing the corner of eye. He grinned, the smile lifting into his irises, somehow adding to the blue.

"Another year done and dusted."

"Yeah," she sighed happily. "And another few grey hairs added to the mix right-." She lifted a hand to his temple, her fingers running along the soft hairs there. "-here."

His eyes grew wide in panic and his hand darted up to his hair. "W-what?"

She grinned at him, shaking her head in amusement. "Kidding, Castle. Jeez, you're easy."

He was about to retort when Martha suddenly appeared and threw her arms around Kate's shoulders.

"Oh, Happy New Year, darlings!" She smacked a kiss against her daughter-in-law's cheek - smearing it with lipstick - before pecking one against her son's cheek.

"The same to you, Mother," Rick added, the affection rolled out over his features.

"Happy New Year, Martha," Kate replied, her mouth curled into a soft smile, turning her back to Rick to face her mother-in-law.

"Well, may this be a wonderful, stupendous, joyful year that lies ahead." She grinned at them, her eyes twinkling mischievously.

"And, of course, may it be filled with another pair of little pink feet." Kate's eyes widened, her mouth falling open in shock. "I would like to be a grandmother to a boy, by the way."

Rick barked out a nervous laugh, wrapping his hands around his wife's upper arms, his chest brushing her back.

"Uh, Mother, easy does it. Don't hold your breath on that." Kate whipped her head to him, a frown suddenly slicing into her forehead.

Martha fluttered her hand around. "Oh, it was worth a try." She smiled at them before spotting someone over her son's shoulder. "There's just the man I'm looking for! I'll see you kids later." With that, she winked at them and sauntered off.

Rick blew out a breath, his mouth curving into a crooked grin. He lifted a hand to Kate's shoulder, dragging it up to her neck so that he could pull her closer and kiss her cheek. She was still wearing a frown, seemingly lost in thought for a moment.

"Do you want a-?" He started to ask, but was interrupted by his wife.

"What did you mean 'don't hold your breath on that'?" She turned sharp eyes to him, her mouth drawn into a tight line.

Rick floundered for a moment, his mouth falling open and his brow creasing. "Uh, I- what? Um, babe, what are you talking about?"

Did he say something wrong?

She turned to him, crossing her arms. She chew on her lip for a moment before lifting her eyes to his; something weighty hidden in the look she was giving him. He started to feel apprehensive about the whole situation and, _shit_, they were not even a full five minutes into the new year without someone saying something-

"Don't you want to have another baby?" Her voice was barely audible, the words drifting out of her mouth, floating up to him in a vulnerable, soft tone.

The question socked him in the gut and for a moment he couldn't breathe past the squeeze in his chest.

Another baby.

Really?

The vision was swimming around in the vestiges of his minds, so tantalizingly close and tangible and beautiful. He couldn't get air in his lungs, oxygen to his brain or words to his tongue.

Rick stared at her for a moment, his alcohol-fogged mind struggling to keep up with the conversation. She mistook his silence for a negative answer and dropped her eyes away from his, swallowing thickly.

"You don't," she said simply, her throat suddenly feeling tight.

The disappointment so visceral, so vivid that she struggled to inhale and exhale normally. She lifted a hand to her forehead and scraped two fingers along the crease forming there in her skin. Her eyes briefly shuttered as she desperately tried to keep her heart from leaking out, pooling her eyes with the devastation that was building.

It was crushing her.

When Rick saw the absolute desolation tainting her graceful features, he lurched forward and grabbed her shoulders. How could she even think that?

"Kate, no! God, no." He moved his hands down to her biceps, squeezing lightly, and ducked down to catch her eyes. "I mean, yes. _Yes._ Of course I want another baby with you."

Her gaze snapped up to him, her heart regaining its hopeful, beautiful rhythm. Slowly and steadily, a smile stretched across her face, like the sun rising in the east. The joy was spilling out of her, out of every pore, every cell in her body. All of it - the desire, the maternal need - engulfing her so quickly and without warning. She wanted it, another baby.

_Badly._

"Yeah?"

He was breathless with it all and his head was spinning - not just from the glasses of champagne he had just consumed a few minutes before.

"Are you _kidding_ me? Kate, I would have ten more babies with you if that's what you want." He framed her face in between his palms and painted her lips with a smiling kiss.

It was a little ridiculous, though, that they were having a life-changing conversation right in the middle of a New Year's Eve party at the Old Haunt. While his mother and Esposito were belting out classic pop tunes. And now Ryan was joining them.

Fantastic.

Kate let out a single note of amusement, pressing her forehead against his the line of his jaw, the stubble prickly against her skin.

"Okay, okay. Um, maybe we should talk about this at home, yeah?" She flicked her eyes towards the trio busy singing _'I will survive_'.

If only they had a video camera nearby. . .

He chuckled into her hair, his lips glancing off her temple, tripping down to her eye bank. "Yeah, sure." He drew back, a leer forming in his expression. "How about we get out of here and start practicing?"

She tracked a hand down his chest, her fingers catching the buttons of his white shirt. The one he looked so very, _very_ sexy in. Kate watched him from underneath her eyelashes, biting her lip. Finally, she dragged her hand down his arm to tangle it with his larger hand, her fingers pushing into the spaces between his larger ones.

"Lead the way, Mr. Castle."

He grinned at her, waggling his eyebrows in excitement. He looked like a little boy about to raid a candy shop.

A _tipsy_ little boy.

She quirked an eyebrow, the mirth dancing in her twinkle of her eyes. "But maybe we should go get our daughter first."

He sobered immediately, the leer and naughtiness vanishing from his face almost immediately.

"Right. Of course." They set up a semi-nursery in Rick's office for all the little ones - Lizzy, Ryan's twins and Esplanie's six-month old baby girl, Michelle. "You think she'll still be asleep amid all of this noise?"

"God, I hope so."

* * *

They trekked through the throng of people towards the office door. It was a perilous journey. They had to dodge a few drunk dancers (two detectives from vice, go figure); one nauseated co-worker (Karpowski, go figure) who ran right past them with a hand over her mouth and eyes as big as saucers; and Esplanie who were making out (go figure) right in front of the latch that led down to the office.

Finally, after breaking up the Esplanie make-up sesh, they descended the stairs. The office was dark and surprisingly insulated from the cacophony of noise just above. Claire - one of the Haunt's employees - glanced up at the sudden intrusion and smiled. All of the kids were fast asleep with - oh, so cute - Lizzy and the two Ryan boys sandwiched together on the floor, lying on an inflatable mattress. Their little bodies were dwarfed by blankets and cushions and teddy bears.

Baby Michelle was sound asleep in her carrier next to Claire on the big, leather couch. The Esplanie baby was gorgeous with her soft, coffee-coloured skin and dowdy, curly, dark hair. The baby wriggled in her sleep, stretching her small limbs out before settling back with a sigh, her round little mouth puffing out a squeaky breath.

So cute.

"Hey, guys. They're still out cold. And completely adorable too," the waitress-turned-temporary-baby-sitter whispered, a smile dancing across her mouth.

"Great. Thanks, Claire," Kate said softly, her hand curled around her husband's arm.

The two Castles watched the scene in front of them in silence for a moment. After a while, Rick carefully bent down and scooped up their daughter, palming her head with a large hand and letting her rest against his shoulder; her little body boneless against his chest. Kate stared at the image, arrested by the visions playing in her mind's eye. She saw how her husband cupped the small skull of a newborn baby, lifting the tiny, wriggling body up and against the warmth of his chest while their daughter stood by and watched.

He turned his eyes back to her, the tenderness and affection making his eyes seem bluer, softening his features. Rick offered her a twitch of his lips as if he could see what she was thinking, his mind also drifting to similar pictures and scenarios.

"We owe you," Rick said, turning his attention to Claire. "Don't worry, you'll get a generous tip added to your salary."

The young brunette just shrugged and folded her arms. "Nah, it was a pleasure." She turned her eyes over the sleeping toddlers before looking at the Castles again. "I don't know, but it kinda makes me wanna get a guy and settle down."

Rick nodded and smiled, his eyes dancing with mirth, his heart thumping a tender beat against his chest.

"Yeah, you do that," Rick said quietly, his eyes drifting to Kate. She offered him a soft, gentle smile; her eyes brimming with adoration and love. "Believe me, it's worth it."

_So_ worth it.

* * *

_"So, what are your New Year's resolutions this year, Detective?" Rick wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, nuzzling his nose in behind her ear, his lips ghosting over the back of her neck, riding over the hard peaks of the vertebrae there. _

_Kate stiffened for a moment, surprised by his presence, before relaxing into his solid warmth. She wrapped her hands around his arms, spanning her fingers over his wrists._

_She sighed, tipping her head upward to watch the fireworks going off in the distance over the Brooklyn Bridge. The display illuminated the night, a variety of different colours sparkling against the black canvass of the sky. It was a few minutes before midnight and they were standing outside his loft on the rooftop just watching the display. It was the dawn of a new year and a new beginning. _

_They were starting this one together. _

_"I don't really have any resolutions," she murmured with a shrug of her shoulders._

_"Okay, what about dreams, wishes?" She could feel his grin spreading out against her skin. "Fantasies?" He whispered into her ear, his voice low and infused with intimacy. _

_Kate turned in his embrace, looping her arms around his neck. She quirked her lips, giving him a mischievous little smirk._

_"Well, I have a lot of fantasies."_

_Rick quirked an interested eyebrow, his lips still pulled into a grin. "Dirty ones?"_

_She breathed out a laugh. "Those ones too, yeah."_

_His grin widened, his baby blues sparkling underneath the city lights. "Looking forward to exploring those." His devilish grin faded slowly, his gaze growing more sober. "Seriously though, what are your dreams for this year?"_

_Kate resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the term 'dreams' because he was so sincere, so earnest. She turned back to look out at the city, only a couple of minutes before midnight and the start of a new year. _

_She let her mind drift for a moment, thinking about what she wanted for the new year. She never really did new year resolutions and never really set out dreams or wishes or goals._

_But, maybe it was time to change that._

_Finally, she turned her body, her shoulder pressed against his chest. She looked up at him, light dancing and flicking over her dark eyes, dousing her features in shadows. _

_It was only a few seconds before midnight now._

_She shrugged and lifted a hand to the collar of his jacket, her fingers fiddling with the smooth material. _

_"I guess my biggest wish is to kiss the same guy on New Year's Eve next year." _

_Slowly, languidly a smile broke open over his mouth; affection taking root and spreading to the rest of his features. He pulled her closer, his arms enclosing her smaller body to his larger one. _

_"That's a good wish," he murmured, his eyes flicking down to her mouth, softly pressing his forehead against hers._

_She offered him a upturn of her mouth, her lower lip kept hostage in between her teeth. "It is," Kate hummed, her lips lingering close to his, waiting for their eventual reunion._

_Finally, as the clock turned midnight and the city celebrated, Rick and Kate sealed the dawn of a new year with a kiss._

* * *

"So, we're gonna do it?" He questioned as she crawled into bed.

Kate frowned at him, too tired to follow the thread of the conversation. It was past 2am. He was the night owl, she decidedly was not.

"Do what?" She asked on a exhale, flicking off the light on her side of the bed.

There was a beat of silence before Rick sighed and shifted his body to face her.

"Have a baby this year," he murmured, his eyes watching her carefully. She could see the restrained hope buried there, the subdued joy whirling around in his blue irises.

Finally, Kate scooted closer to her husband and lifted a hand to brush the bangs from his forehead. She stroked a few fingers over the crease there, tripping over the scar before dragging her fingers down and along his eyebrows.

He looked like a little boy.

She returned her eyes to his, saw him watching her intently, waiting for an answer. She offered him tilt of her lips and moved in to kiss him softly, delicately, beautifully. Her tongue swept over his lower lip, tasting like a promise, a vow.

A dream.

"Yes," she breathed, wrapping herself into his warmth. "A million times yes."

* * *

_[][][]_

_No words or language, _

_It doesn't deserve such treatment, _

_And all my stumbling phrases, _

_Never amounted to anything worth this feeling, _

_All this heaven, _

_Never could describe such a feeling as I'm having, _

_Words were never so useful, _

_So I was screaming out a language _

_That I never knew existed before._

* * *

**A/N: I hope that was enjoyable. I'm looking forward to adding to this little family, but of course all in good time. I'm playing around with a few ideas (including the crazy stalker lady) that I want to implement before that eventuality. **

**Thanks for reading! Reviews are always welcome.**

**Lyrics at the end: Florence + The Machine's "All this and heaven too".**

**Apologies for any spelling/grammar mistakes. I don't have a beta.**


	58. Chapter 58

**A/N: Yeah, 4 months - no excuse, except that the muse was gone, completely gone. But then 'Watershed' happened and I got a bit of a kick-start. I had great difficulty with this chapter and changed a lot of things. But here it is. It feels a little rusty, but hopefully it will get things moving along again.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Marlowe, you magnificent bastard. Is it September yet? **

* * *

**Chapter 58 - A book like this**

Her head was going to burst.

The pressure was brimming behind her eyes and pulsing throughout her skull. Kate closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, exhaling slowly. It was late and she was exhausted. Come to think of it, she was constantly tired the last few weeks.

Maybe it was time for a break.

She lifted her head and focused her eyes on the whiteboard again. Okay, so they had time of death, cause of death and they had the murder-

"Hey."

Kate startled and whipped around, colliding with her husband's broad frame. "God, Castle," she breathed, a hand clutched to her chest.

He grinned and wrapped a hand around her arm, pulling her closer. "Scared you, huh?"

"No," she huffed before pressing a quick kiss against his mouth. "What are you doing here? Where's Lizzy?"

"I thought I'd bring you some dinner. And Lizzy is with my mother - give us some time to catch up."

She rewarded him with a leisured tilt of her mouth, her tongue caught between her smiling teeth. She stepped closer, sliding her hand underneath the sleeve of his black coat, her fingers dancing across his wrist.

He looked - and smelled - _delicious_.

"Sounds good," she murmured with a muted tip of mouth. "I'm starving."

Castle laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners. Kate wrapped her fingers around his larger ones and and pulled him along after her to the break room.

"So? How's the investigation going?" He asked, pulling out the homemade lasagne.

She sagged back against the counter and weaved a hand through her hair. "It's frustrating." She dropped her head and sighed. "Just when we think here's the break that's needed, we get screwed."

He beckoned her closer, handing her a plate. "So, the best friend is a dead-end?"

"Thanks," she said, sitting down. "Yeah, she has a solid alibi."

"Oh. Damn. Back to square one then?"

She pursed her lips. "Well, from what we gathered from her family, she's had a stalker for a few months now. So, I've sent out the boys to canvass the neighbours again to see if they've noticed someone hanging around. Hopefully they'll find something."

"Mm, okay. That's progress at least." He slid up next to her, a hand falling to her back, caressing up to the base of her neck.

He's been very touchy in the last couple of weeks.

"Can't wait to get you home, Mrs. Castle," he murmured, his mouth next to her ear.

She swallowed hard, dinner momentarily forgotten. "Oh yeah? You got plans for me?"

"You have no idea," he whispered, nuzzling his nose in behind her ear, her jaw cradled in between his fingers. "When we get home," he continued, his lips ghosting across the shell of her ear. "I'm going to strip you very, _very_ slowly and then-"

"Get a room," Esposito's voice boomed, shattering their little bubble of intimacy.

They jerked apart and saw the boys standing by the break room entrance, both wearing disgusted expressions.

"Look, we know you guys are trying again-" Kate whipped up to glare at her husband. He only shrugged. In the last couple of months he's been having some of the best sex of his life.

He had to brag a little.

"-but can you _please_ keep it out of the place where we _eat_," Ryan complained with a mock scowl.

"Says the man who helped conceive his twins in Central Park," Kate shot back.

Ryan's eyes almost popped out of his head, his mouth falling open in shock. "What-? How-? Jenny told you about that?!" He squeaked.

Kate lifted a sculpted eyebrow. "Your wife and I are close." Esposito guffawed at the expense of his partner. She turned her attention to the Hispanic detective.

"And don't forget that Lanie's my best friend, Espo. I _know_ things about you. . . _Latin Lover_." The smirk quickly sunk away, only leaving narrowed eyes in its wake. She could swear his cheeks were pinker than usual.

When Kate turned her attention back to her husband, she wasn't met by smiling eyes or a grinning mouth, but rather concern and a hint of panic.

"Please tell me that you didn't share any details with Lanie and Jenny on how our daughter was conceived. Or any other pieces of _intimate_ knowledge."

"Don't worry, Castle, I play it close to the chest." Her mouth curled into a devilish grin. "Besides, I only share the good things you do to me."

"Oh, hell no. I'm out," Esposito spat, before turning around and stalking off, appetite suddenly forgotten.

Ryan looked between them, his mouth stitched in severe line, his brow pulled downward.

"You two make me sick." He shivered and turned around. Before he got far, however, he swiveled back. "Oh, Beckett, before I forget - we got a hit on our stalker."

She stood up, all business now. "Yeah? What'd you got?"

"Name's Josh Dellande - he's a co-worker. And he's got a record."

She nodded, a sense of satisfaction, of progress flowing through her veins.

"Good. Do you have an address on him?"

"Uh, yeah," Epso called out from behind his desk. "A place in Queens."

Kate checked her watch - 21:56 pm. Damn. "Alright, it's late. Let's pick him up in the morning and bring him in for questioning."

Ryan gave a nod. "Will do, Beckett."

"First thing in the morning," Esposito added, pulling his jacket off the back of the chair.

"Night guys."

"See you. Ciao," Esposito hollered.

Ryan shrugged on a jacket and gave them a little wave, his partner waiting for him.

"Night Mom, Dad," the Irish detective called out cheekily before disappearing behind the elevator doors.

Kate rolled her eyes and Castle let out a bellowing laugh. He turned back to his wife - tired and watching him with a gentle, clear expression.

He reached out and cupped her cheek, his thumb brushing the soft skin just underneath her eye. Her eyes fluttered close, the dark sweep of her eyelashes kissing the top of his thumb.

"You ready to go?"

She leaned into his palm, her hand coming up to encircle his wrist. After a few moment, her eyes opened again. She pressed her mouth against his, soft and pliable.

"Yeah, let's get out of here."

* * *

She checked again, just to be certain. You never know - that cop bitch could have someone surveilling her.

Good, no one was watching her.

She adjusted the awkward-looking black wig on her head and darted across the street. It wasn't difficult figuring out where he lived. Or to keep tabs on _her._ Her hands were shaking with a combination of adrenaline and excitement as she pulled the manila folder out of her bag. Nikki took a steadying breath and pushed the file into the gaping mouth of the post box.

Surely, _this_ would get his attention.

* * *

Kate really tried to stay awake.

She really did. And it was not because of her husband's lack of trying. She was just exhausted. After his third attempt to seduce her out of tiredness, Castle relented with a soft chuckle and a kiss to her forehead.

"Sleep, Kate."

She struggled vainly against the tentacles of exhaustion. Damn it, she wanted him. _Badly_.

One last time.

"No, wait." She wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling his body back on top of hers, every curve and bump aligning delightfully.

"I want to."

Kate was pleased to see the darkening of his eyes again and to feel the way his hands flexed around her hips. Good. He was as affected as she was.

Castle swallowed thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing. "Honey, you're exhausted and you have a long day tomorrow."

The detective answered by draping her leg around his hip, her foot digging into his thigh.

"I want to make a baby with you, Castle," she breathed, pushing up and rotating her pelvis against his. He grunted and dropped his head to her chest, exhaling harshly.

The appeal to his virility brought out his inner caveman every time.

Kate slowly scratched her nails up his naked back before gently massaging the base of his neck, moving her hands over his head and sliding her fingers into his hair. He lifted his face to her again, eyes nearly black with arousal. She dug her foot into his calf and rolled her hips against his. Castle reacted by roughly grabbing her thigh and hoisting her leg up to wrap around his middle.

"Eyes open, Beckett," he growled, his voice like a rough edge, vibrating right down into her bones. He drove his lips onto hers, drinking her moan and soothing the burning desire of her mouth with his tongue.

Oh, yes, definitely open.

Everything unlocked and exposed.

* * *

He was out cold. Splayed on his stomach, hair mussed, drooling all over his pillow. Gross, but kinda cute too. A smile curved her mouth as she watched him. She leaned down and brushed her fingers across his eyebrow and over his cheek.

"Castle," she murmured softly, careful not to scare him to wakefulness. His flying limbs can be quite dangerous. "Castle," she said louder.

He groaned and turned his face away from her. Kate chuckled and pressed her body across his back, peppering his jaw and cheek with kisses.

"Castle, wake up."

He growled and flipped onto his back, eyes opening slowly. "What's going on?"

She let out a single note of amusement. "Nothing, babe. Just, I gotta get to work."

He sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Time is it?"

Kate pursed her lips and darted her eyes pointedly to his lap. "Seven. Too early for Little Castle to be up it seems."

He stared at her in confusion for a moment. Little Castle- ?

Oh. . . _oh._

"Wasn't so little last night," he muttered sourly, self-consciously pulling the sheet up to his stomach.

Kate laughed, combing her hand through his floppy, disheveled hair.

"Not what I meant. You didn't hear me complaining, did you Castle?"

"No, just a lot of moaning."

She laughed harder, rewarding him with a quick kiss; a happy, sloppy press of her mouth against his. Mm, Happy!Kate - the best kind. So soft and giving; not afraid any longer to let him see _her_.

All of her.

When she gets emotional watching some cheesy movie. Those days where she just walks around barefoot in a pair of ratty jeans and an oversized hoodie, her hair caught up in a messy ponytail. The times where she plays video games with him and gets really competitive. The nights when she watches over their sleeping daughter, guarding over her, keeping her safe.

"I gotta go," Kate said, snapping him out of his reverie.

"Really? But it's so early." He snatched her wrist and pulled her back into him, knocking his lips into hers for a bruising kiss.

Kate pulled away after a moment and wrinkled her nose, a smile flirting with her mouth. "Morning breath, Castle. And yes, I have to leave. They got a hit on our stalker."

He pouted, but released her. "'Kay. I'll try to stop by later for lunch."

"I'll call you," she replied, grabbing her coat and slinging her bag over her shoulder. She came back to brush a kiss across his forehead, her hand cradling the back of his head. "Love you."

"Love you too," he sighed, watching her walk away.

She swung around. "Oh and remember to pick up the mail, please. My dad sent us postcards."

"Okay, I will. Be safe."

Kate braced herself against the doorframe and offered him a muted smile.

"Always."

* * *

He stared at the photos, his forehead pulling down into a frown and unease rolling around in his stomach. He swept a shaky hand over the photo of a giggling Lizzy playing in the park with a grinning Kate watching in the background.

There were about twenty photos, varying dates and times - some were of his daughter and wife, some just of Kate. The focus of the surveillance seemed to be the detective. What was even more unsettling was the strange letter he had gotten with the photos. The deranged _fan_ claimed that she was his true love and that Kate was just some. . . distraction.

A distraction that needed to be removed.

Rick dropped his head down into a waiting palm, rubbing the hand over his scalp, scraping his fingers through his hair. Sometimes he really hated his semi-celebrity status. He let out a laboured breath and, after a moment's hesitation, picked up his phone. He sat back and clenched his jaw, waiting for his call to be answered.

"Hello?"

"Jack, it's Rick Castle."

"Mr. Castle," the other man sounded surprised. "How may I help you?"

Castle got out of his chair, his features cast in shadows. "I need an upgrade on my private security - specifically for my wife and youngest daughter."

"That can be done, Mr. Castle. We just need to sit down and discuss the details."

"Yeah, yeah. Okay, that's fine." He scrubbed a hand down his face, the crease in his forehead growing deeper. "Just. . . my wife can't find out about this."

* * *

**A/N: Thank you for your patience, but the last few months I've just had no inspiration. I wrote bits and pieces, but it never felt right. This is the closest I've come to being satisfied with this chapter. **

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title - from the Angus and Julia Stone song of the same name. **


	59. Chapter 59

**A/N: I love the end of the semester! It means more time to write and thus, inspiration to fill me. Thank you so much for the last chapter's reviews - that really aided the muse for this one. This chapter is a continuation of the last chapter's storytelling.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: they would be married by now. **

* * *

**Chapter 59 - The Fantastic Four**

"So?"

She bit her lip and raised an eyebrow, her heart galloping inside the cavity in her chest. The other woman glanced up, her face void of expression. Kate started to feel her stomach drop, the disappointment so visceral that she almost choked with it. But then the doctor's mouth softened into a smile and she nodded.

"Congratulations, Kate."

"Yeah? You're sure?" She breathed, a soft, hopeful burst of air passing between her parted lips. A smile blossomed across her features, joy springing to life throughout her body.

"Yes. You're about 6 weeks pregnant."

* * *

He stared at his phone, hoping that this time he would get an answer from his wife.

It's been twenty minutes already.

"Mr. Castle?"

His head snapped up, confusion swamping his features. The suits were looking at him expectantly. Gina shot him a withering glare, arms crossed over her chest.

Oops.

He pocketed his phone and tried to push down the rising anxiety swirling around in his gut.

"Uh, sorry. You were saying?"

They were fine. Both of them - probably just playing around in the loft or taking a nap or just strolling around in some park-

His throat closed up, his heart jumping against his ribs. What if something-? No, no. They were _fine._ He was just being paranoid.

"The latest Nikki Heat novel sold over twenty million copies. . ."

He tried to listen, he really did, but the doubt and panic kept creeping up on him.

Why wasn't she answering her phone?

* * *

They strolled leisurely around the city streets, oblivious to hasty commuters. The pull of a smile just couldn't leave Kate's mouth, her left hand constantly gravitating to her abdomen. Lizzy was hanging on to her right hand, giving little hops as she sang along to her own, made-up song. Or at least something resembling a song. It was mostly a jumble of softly sung words, woven together by a little girl's voice.

Kate tugged her daughter closer to her side, Lizzy's head gently nudging her mother's thigh. The two year-old glanced up at her mother with a beaming, toothy grin, her blue eyes sparkling with energy. Must be the ice cream just had. She was going to be a tad hyper the whole afternoon and then maybe crash by seven.

Oh, well.

It was a celebration - Lizzy was going to be a big sister after all. Not that she understood any of that. In her selfish two year-old world, a baby brother or sister would completely exist for her entertainment and enjoyment.

"Momma."

Kate snapped her eyes to her daughter, her small hand pointing towards a toy shop a few feet from them. She laughed and brushed her hand over her little girl's head, running her fingers through the soft curls.

"Yeah, baby, you wanna go in?"

"Doggy," Lizzy uttered quietly, her eyes riveted on a soft, stuffed toy dog - a ridiculous looking pink one perched at the front of the store's windows. Oh, jeez. The kid and dogs. She's gonna drive them mad until they buy her puppy.

Not yet, sweetheart.

There can only be _one_ baby in the house at a time. Kate's lips involuntarily pulled into a grin and her hand once again gravitating to her abdomen.

"Okay, c'mon, sweetheart. Let's go get you the doggy."

Lizzy's face burst open with happiness and giggling excitement. "Doggy! Doggy!" She practically dragged her mother by hand to the store, her little feet determined not to stumble in their haste.

Kate chuckled, her left hand still protectively curled around her stomach.

"Slow down, baby, we've got all day."

* * *

_"Kate, we've got all day," he moaned, flopping back against the mattress. _

_"Castle, you promised," she said, stepping out from the closet door and giving him a pointed look. "You told me last weekend that we will start with the baby room this Saturday. It's Saturday."_

_He groaned. "But it's like 8am."_

_"So?" She shrugged, shimmying into her leggings. _

_He stared at her for a moment, letting his eyes slowly walk up her long, lithe legs. "So, we could snuggle for another hour or so and then get up."_

_"Translation, have another round of sex and then wake up at 12pm and then rush out the door like maniacs to get everything."_

_He nodded, his mouth pulling downwards. "Or that. I don't oppose the sex part."_

_Kate rolled her eyes as she passed the bed in only her leggings and bra, thoroughly distracting her husband again. She was three months pregnant and already showing a small bump. _

_Drop dead gorgeous. _

_"Castle, come on," she said in exasperation, working the buttons of a purple blouse. He sighed at the loss of the view he had and finally threw the covers off, getting to his feet. _

_"You showered without me," he commented morosely as he passed her to into the bathroom. _

_"You preferred to stay in bed for that part."_

_"That was stupid."_

_She laughed and shook her head, half distracted by the effort to get her shoes on. "Yeah, it was."_

_A few minutes later, he walked out, shirtless, to get clothes out of the closet. Her gut clenched, her breath hitching; the want and desire so vivid that she almost stumbled off the bed. Kate swallowed and tried to tear her eyes away from him. She wanted him - again. She always wanted him the last few weeks. She was hyper aware of her husband, his masculine presence and scent. _

_God, it was pathetic._

_Her heart was screaming against her ribs, the only sound she was aware of was the blood pumping hotly through her veins._

_"Kate? Did you hear me?"_

_Her head snapped up. He was watching her with a puzzled expression and he was still shirtless. Damn. And now his hair was flopping over his forehead in that adorable way. Her mouth parted slightly, but she couldn't get anything out, except a breathy sigh. He seemed to catch on quick enough, her face like an open book to him - her eyes were almost black with arousal._

___Aroused!Kate was just too irresistible._

_Slowly, he made his way over to her, a leer pulling at his mouth. He sat down beside her, watching her carefully as she tried to avoid looking at him. __Rick brushed a strand of hair off her cheek, his fingers lingering against her skin. Her eyes fluttered shut for a moment, her skin breaking out in goosebumps. He leaned in and glanced her cheekbone with a feathery kiss, shifting his mouth towards her ear. _

_"You want me, don't you?" Bless those pregnancy hormones._

_She groaned, out of annoyance or arousal or both. "Castle," she exhaled shakily, her eyes screwed shut and her hands in fists as if trying to keep everything under control. _

_Oh, man, he_ loved_ Pregnant!Kate. _

_He cupped her cheek gently, sweeping his thumb just underneath her right eye. Her eyes trembled open and she watched him, everything laid bare. He pressed his mouth to hers, his hands travelling to her blouse._

_Her hands snapped to his, halting his fingers' progress. "What about the room?" It was an empty protest because her lips were already gravitating back to his._

_He replied by returning his fingers to their task and slowly pushing her back onto the bed. _

_"We've got all day."_

* * *

It's been two hours.

He was panicking. Pacing around in the loft, unable to sit still or to focus on anything. He tried, he really did. He came home after his meeting, determined not to obsessively stare at his phone. He ate lunch, still subconsciously glancing at his phone on the counter every few seconds. He sat down to write a bit, but kept being distracted into a storyline about Nikki and a stalker (go figure). He tried to exercise, but quit after ten minutes of running on the treadmill. Now he was back to square one. If he only knew _where_ they went. He left about a dozen messages. The last few voicemails were peppered with angry swear words.

_Kate, pick up your ******* phone!_

Rick never uses that sort of language when talking to his wife, but when there is a freaking stalker on the loose who's targeting his family, things change drastically. And that's why he was phoning her partners right now.

"Hey, Castle. What's up?" Ryan greeted, friendly, but distracted.

The writer rubbed his jaw, feeling sheepish. It was probably nothing, but he couldn't take a chance. He cleared his throat and tried for nonchalant.

"Uh, has Kate stopped by there by any chance today?"

He could practically hear the detective's frown. "No, I haven't seen her. Wait. . . Javi? Has Beckett been here today?" Rick could hear Esposito's negative answer and sighed, briefly closing his eyes.

"No, man. Why? You lost your wife?" Ryan asked on a chuckle. Rick's chest constricted at that, his stomach dropping.

He let out a forced laugh, scratching his forehead. "No, no. Just, I can't get hold of her. I was in meetings all day and Kate is just not answering-"

At that, the front door pushed open with Kate and Lizzy coming through, chatting and giggling excitedly.

"-her phone," he finished, his knees almost buckling with relief. "Uh, don't worry, mystery solved. They just walked in. Thanks, Kev, I'll see you. Bye." He dropped his head for a moment, his heart rate stabilising to its normal rate.

"Daddy!" Lizzy crashed into his legs, her small arms wrapping around his knees.

He puffed out a laugh and picked up his daughter, crushing her to him. "Hey, baby," he murmured, nuzzling her cheek; he could smell her baby soap and lotion.

"Hey," Kate greeted, smiling at him warmly, something extra in her gaze.

He started to return the smile, but then remembered the last few hours and how she didn't answer her phone and the terrifying panic he felt. He got angry again. Their daughter was with her. What if-? Yeah, he couldn't think about it. She should've answered her damn phone. Gently, he put his daughter down and watched her scramble to the television for her cartoons after grabbing some weird-looking soft toy - a pink dog or something like that.

"How were your meetings, honey?" Kate asked, setting down her bags of shopping on the kitchen counter.

He ignored her question, striding into the kitchen. "Can I talk to you for a minute? In there?" He gestured to the office with his head.

She chuckled, slightly puzzled. She continued to unpack the grocery bags. "Okay, but just give me a chance to-"

"_Now,_" he growled, unable to keep the anger out of his tone. He took her hand and hauled her off to the office. He didn't want Lizzy to see an argument.

She pulled her hand out of his once they got into the office. "What the hell, Rick?"

He closed the door and just stood there for a moment before turning around. Her arms were crossed over her torso, a frown slicing into her forehead.

"Where the _hell_ have you been?" He hissed, the last few hours' emotions rushing out. She startled and dropped her arms.

Wait, what?

"Excuse me?"

"Where have you been all day, Kate?"

She watched him in disbelief. "I had an appointment and then I took Lizzy out for a few hours," she answered, confused. "What's the big deal, Castle?"

"So, what? You don't bother to answer my calls all of a sudden?" He stood with his hands on his hips, his eyes an electric shade of blue. "Fuck, Kate, I've been calling you the whole _fucking_ day!"

She stared at him, her mouth dropping open in shock. He _never_ spoke to her that way.

What the hell?

She dropped her gaze and fumbled for her phone, feeling her eyes beginning to sting with tears. Kate bit her lip and set her jaw - she was _not_ going to cry because of some stupid, ridiculous argument.

"My phone is off. The battery must have died," she said, her voice carefully controlled and tight, her throat burning.

He lowered and softened his voice. "Kate, why didn't you just tell me where you were going? What if something happened?"

"Nothing happened!" She cried, throwing her arms in the air. "God, what has gotten into you?"

"Where were you today?" He persisted. The stalker could've followed them.

She became very still. "You're _not_ serious right now."

"As a heart attack," he snapped back, crossing his arms. He was not compromising on the safety of his family. Even if it meant that his wife hated him for a day. Or two.

Kate hesitated a moment before the fight drained out of her. She sagged onto the couch, suddenly worn out.

"I went to the doctor for a blood test."

His chest felt like a vice, his heart skipping a beat. "What? Why?" He approached her in quick, hurried steps; anger melting away in an instant. He sat down closely beside her, his hand covering her kneecap and his fingers circling around the hard ridge of the bone.

She smiled, a watery, vulnerable quiver of her mouth.

"I'm pregnant."

[] [] []

_I'll be your harvester of light_

_And send it out tonight_

_So we can start again_

_Is love alive? Is love alive? Is love alive?_

_My love a beacon in the night_

_My words will be your light_

_To carry you to me_

* * *

**A/N: The next chapter will follow directly from this one, showing Rick's reaction. I deliberately wove the stalker story into the pregnancy storyline to give Rick an extra incentive not to tell his wife about the situation. **

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes. **

**As always, your reviews are appreciated.**

**Lyrics at the end - Sara Bareilles and Ingrid Michaelson, 'Winter Song'. **


	60. Chapter 60

**A/N: Thank you for the great feedback for the last chapter. You are great! This chapter follows directly from the previous one - I warn you, it's quite fluffy.**

**Enjoy this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: yeah, there wouldn't be a fracking hiatus.**

* * *

**Chapter 60 - Flowers In Your Hair**

_Pregnant._

Oh, wow. They were going to have another baby. Jeez, he could hear the blood rushing in his ears. With everything that's happened in the last two weeks, that had been relegated to the back of his mind. He was staring at her, his mouth hanging open and his eyes wide.

"So, yeah, congratulations," she muttered, her voice cracking as she struggled against the tears.

Damn hormones. Damn pig-headed husband.

Kate started to stand up, but was stopped when Rick pulled her back towards him, wrapping his arms around her in a bone-crushing hug.

"You're pregnant. W-we're having a baby," he murmured in awe, his breath tickling her hair.

"Yeah. I had a whole speech planned, but thanks for battering that out of me, Castle. You sure know how to make a girl feel special," she commented around a broken laugh.

He stilled around her and pulled back slightly. "God, I'm sorry." He cupped her face, his fingers roaming over her cheekbones and jaw. "I'm _so_ sorry."

Her brow furrowed as she swiped her fingers underneath her eyes to catch the moisture, dislodging his hands.

"Why did you react that way?"

He shrugged. "I panicked."

"_Panicked?_ About what, Castle?" She gave him a puzzled look.

"It's stupid," he deflected, trying to give her a smile. She wasn't convinced. "Just my silly writer's imagination."

She huffed, her mouth pulling upward, her forehead creased with a frown. "Rick, is something wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong," he deflected again. Before she could corner him again, he changed the subject. He didn't want to talk about a crazed stalker fan.

He wanted to talk about their baby.

"How far along are you?" He asked, gently pressing the palm of his hand against her abdomen, his whole face slowly lighting up with joy.

She melted a little, her smaller hand coming to cover his. "About six weeks," she said with a growing smile.

He grinned, his eyes crinkling as he kept them on their hands resting on her still-flat stomach.

"Kate - wow. Oh, wow. We're having a baby."

She let out a note of laughter and pressed her smile against his. Their moment was broken when two little hands knocked loudly and persistently against the door.

"Momma! Momma!"

Rick nuzzled his wife's cheek, chuckling into her skin. "You're on call, Mommy."

She rolled her eyes and stood up. "Coming, baby!"

However, before she could move away, he grabbed her hand. She turned questioning eyes on him, her brow pulling together.

"Kate, I'm sorry."

She blinked back the sudden emotion and nodded, swallowing thickly. She rubbed her thumb over his fingers, glancing off his wedding band.

"I know. We'll talk later."

Rick sighed and nodded, letting her go. He watched as she opened the door to scoop up their daughter - that silly, pink dog still in her arms - and blow raspberries in Lizzy's neck. He sank back with a soft smile and watched them walk off - giggling and whispering secrets shared just between two girls. In a few months, it might be three.

Or two girls and two guys.

Who knew?

* * *

"Kate?"

"In here," she called out, her voice muffled from behind the bathroom door. He could hear splashing sounds and Lizzy's enthusiastic chatter. They must be having a bubble bath. It has become a bit of a tradition over the last few months. Lizzy started going through a phase where she wanted to have a bubble bath with her mother.

Rick opened the door and laughed, steam billowing all around him. He tried to wave it away, finding it difficult to see them amid the mountain of bubbles. Kate turned to look at him, giving him a distracted smile as she washed Lizzy's hair. The two-year old was thumping the bubbles with her bath toys - Nemo and Daffy Duck.

"Hey, what are you doing here, Castle? It's girls' night."

He sat down on the edge of the bath and lifted a shoulder, his gaze sliding down her figure without volition.

"I got bored."

God, she was beautiful.

"Eyes up, bud. We've got a toddler in here."

He grinned - completely unrepentant - as his eyes slowly walked up her body, milking it for everything it was worth.

"Can't help it - it's basic biology."

She laughed and turned her attention back to her daughter, shaking her head in reproach. She tipped a cup of water over Lizzy's head, causing her to sputter and cough. She whined and tried to jerk away from her mother, but Kate kept a hand against her daughter's chest and repeated the action. The little girl started to cry and pushed her small fists into her eyes.

"Oh, baby, so dramatic. You know it's coming - every time," Kate sighed to her daughter, wiping down Lizzy's face with a washcloth. "You're on duty for the next bath, Castle." She turned towards her husband with a raised eyebrow. "Not that _you_ would get the dramatics; she does everything her daddy asks."

"We're thick as thieves," Rick murmured, his mouth lifting into a soft curve, his eyes regarding them affectionately. God, he was scared today. Out of his mind with fear. Yes, it was stupid and irrational, but. . . this is his family. The two of-

_Three._ Soon there would be three.

"Yes, you two are. But maybe me and this one-" She touched her stomach. "-will be a tag team."

A laugh bubbled out of his chest, heart thumping against his ribs; the reality of it making him breathless. "Not if it's a boy."

"_Especially_, if it's a boy," she shot back, quirking an eyebrow at him. Her eyes sparkled, her mouth soft with happiness. "Just think - a little boy following me around everywhere I go-"

"Like someone else you know," Rick quipped, winking at her.

She laughed and nodded. "Yeah, exactly. Face it, Castle, if we have a son, he's going to be a momma's boy for at least the first few years of his life."

He shrugged. "I can live with that. I've been one my whole life and I turned out pretty awesome."

She smiled distractedly and finished wiping Lizzy's arms with the washcloth.

"There you go, Sweet Pea - all done. Nice and clean, baby." The little girl abandoned her toys and turned around, launching herself into Kate. She clambered all over Kate, wrapping her small arms around her mother's neck.

"Momma. . . lovies you," she breathed, her soft, little-girl voice reverberating right into her mother's heart.

Kate squeezed her daughter tightly, painting her cheeks with kisses. "Oh, baby, Mommy loves you too. So, _so_ much." She pecked her on the nose. "It's time for you to get ready for bed." Kate turned to look at her husband who had been regarding them silently. "Castle, take her please." She handed her daughter off to her husband. "Momma's gotta shave."

Rick groaned as he wrapped Lizzy tightly in a towel, hugging her little body to his chest. The little girl burrowed into him, her hands playing with buttons of his shirt.

"Oh, man, I wanna to watch. You know how much I love to watch you do that." He wiggled his eyebrows, grinning. "Call me crazy, but it's kinda arousing."

She rolled her eyes and grabbed a razor.

"Uh-uh, not tonight. Consider this your punishment."

He frowned at her, rubbing his daughter's back. "My punishment?"

"For acting like a jackass earlier and going off at me like you did."

Oh. . . right. _That_.

He strode towards her and reached a hand out to touch her cheek, sliding his fingers across her damp skin. She turned her attention to him and he bent down to dust his lips over hers, his fingers coming to cradle her chin.

An apology, an offering of atonement.

"I love you, Kate," he whispered into her mouth.

She let out a breath. "Love you too."

Rick cleared his throat and stood up. "You finish up in here and I'll get this one-" he gestured towards their daughter, whose head was drowsily cushioned on his shoulder; her wet hair staining his shirt. "-dressed and ready for bed."

* * *

The moment they entered her room, Lizzy squirmed in his arms to be let down. He relented and watched her dart butt-naked to her underwear drawer. At least there was heating in the room. He managed to stop her from throwing out all of her panties on the floor.

"Whoa, baby girl," he said with a huff of laughter. She was standing with both hands full of underwear, a mischievous grin playing around in her eyes. "You only need one." He took one out of her hand and proceeded to get her dressed - most of the time without a fuss. She was good with him. Sometimes with Kate she would run around the room - stark naked and cackling - just to exasperate her mother. With him though, she obediently gave her cooperation.

Well, most of the time.

"Jammies, Daddy."

He chuckled again and nodded. "Yes, sweetie, we have to put you into some pajamas so that you can sleep tonight."

She nodded enthusiastically, using her small hands to push back the mass of wet hair off her face. Rick pulled open the second drawer where her pajamas were placed. He knew by now already, that Lizzy the Independent Two Year-Old would like to have the final say in what sleepwear she wanted to be dressed.

"So, what'll will it be tonight, Sweet Pea?"

"'Mo! 'Mo!" She squealed, jumping up and down.

He laughed. "Okay, okay. Elmo jammies it is."

He quickly dressed her in the long-sleeved, pink pajamas with Elmo's face on the shirt asking for hugs.

"Can I get a hug, baby?" He was still on his knees and opened his arms to his daughter, giving her a lopsided grin. Immediately, Lizzy crashed into him, clambering up against the wall of his chest and wrapping around him like a clam, her arms tight around his neck.

"Oh, that's so good. Thank you, Lizzy-bug," he murmured, pulling back slightly. He pecked her on both cheeks causing her to give him a shy burst of laughter, her small hands playing with the collar of his shirt.

He stood up and deposited her on the bed, making her bounce. She fell into a fit of giggles, rising on to stand on her knees and holding out her arms for her father. Rick plopped down next to her, scooping her up and dropping her into his lap to brush out her hair. He did this regularly - Kate left too early for work sometimes or came in too late to do this. It has become their special time together.

"Hey."

His head jerked up at Kate's soft voice. She pushed off the doorframe and made her way towards them, a smile dancing on her features. She was wearing a pair of leggings and a worn-out, comfortable NYPD-top, her face scrubbed clean and her hair gathered in a messy bun.

He returned a smile. "Hey."

Lizzy by now was resting against her father's chest, her eyes drooping.

"You guys getting ready for bed, Sweet Pea?" Kate murmured to her daughter as she sat down. She brushed a few fingers along her daughter's cheek causing Lizzy to thrust out her arms to her mother.

"Momma, uppie."

Kate chuckled and lifted her off Castle's lap. "Story time, baby?" She whispered to the little girl. Lizzy nodded, turning electric blue eyes up to her mother and burrowed further into Kate, taking a strand of stray hair in between two small fingers.

Kate shifted up the small bed, her daughter resting against her chest. She shot Castle a look, quirking an eyebrow at him, a smile lifting her mouth.

"Daddy, would you do the honours?"

"My pleasure," he said with relish, flopping down next to them. Lizzy giggled at her father, giving him adoring grin for his silly efforts. Rick pulled a face to make her giggle even more and quickly leaned in to kiss her on the nose. He turned to sit against the headboard, his feet dangling off the end of the small bed. He wrapped an arm around Kate's shoulder and pulled her against him, Lizzy in between them. He pressed a kiss against his wife's temple, nuzzling his nose against her skin.

Finally, they all turned their attention to the storybook.

His voice flowed in a low, smooth cadence, casting a spell over the room.

"Once upon a time. . ."

* * *

"When did you start to suspect something?"

They were lying in bed, Kate's head cushioned on his chest, slowly being pulled into sleep. She sighed, her eyes fluttering open as she peered up at him.

"Mm?"

He chuckled quietly. "When did you suspect about being knocked up?"

She groaned and half-heartedly slapped at his chest. "Do you have to put it _that_ way?"

He rubbed a hand across her back, smiling in the darkness. "Okay, sorry. When did you suspect that you were with child?"

Kate laughed and pushed herself up, her forearm resting on his chest. "Really? 'With child'?" He shrugged. Even though it was dark, Kate could basically see him wiggle his eyebrows.

"When did you suspect that I impregnated you?"

She puffed a laugh and punched him lightly. "Stop it!"

He grinned and pulled her down against him. "Fine. So, when?"

She sighed and got comfortable, playing with the soft, worn collar of his sleep t-shirt. "Uh, about two weeks ago. I took two pregnancy tests, but got a negative and a positive result. So, I made an appointment with Doctor Jones and went for a blood test instead." Her mouth stretched into a wide, beaming smile. "The rest is history."

His brow pulled together and he glanced down at her in the darkness.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She was quiet, her eyes not meeting his. "You've been. . .distant the last couple of weeks."

His heart kicked up a gallop inside his chest. "Distant? What do you mean, Kate?"

She flicked her eyes to his, something fragile in them contrasting with the beauty of her sharp, angular features.

"Just. . .you've been distracted. I can see that something's eating at you, Rick, and that you're under pressure to get the book done."

Castle pushed himself up, lying on this side to look at her. "Hey, that doesn't matter. You should tell me these things - no matter what, Kate. Come on, we've been married for ages and-"

"Hardly ages, Castle," she commented sardonically.

He ignored that. "-we shouldn't keep stuff from each other."

Except if you knew about a crazed stalker fan targeting your wife and child.

"I wasn't keeping it from you, I just wanted to make sure and then tell you. Give you some good news. Like I planned to do today."

He winced. "Yeah, sorry about that - _again._"

She bit her lip and watched him from underneath her eyelashes. "You gonna make it up to me, Rick?"

His jaw grew slack, his eyes widening comically. He flipped over and pinned her to the bed. "Does this mean I'm forgiven?" He murmured, grinning.

She wound her arms around his neck, arching her body into his.

"Only if you make it good, Big Guy."

He groaned and captured her lips in a heated kiss, sucking and nibbling on her lower lip.

"It's always good."

She offered him a lazy, feline smile. "Oh, yes." She dragged his shirt over his head, smoothing her hands over his shoulders.

"But I bet we can make it better."

[] [] []

_Be still and know_

_That I'm with you._

_Be still and know_

_That I am here._

_Be still and know_

_That I'm with you_.

* * *

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed this - I'm looking forward to exploring this new facet of their story. The stalker storyline is still in the pipeline and Kate will find out about it soon.**

**Apologies for grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title - from the Lumineers song, 'Flowers in your hair'. Lyrics at the end - 'Be Still' from The Fray.**


	61. Chapter 61

**A/N: Once again, thank you for all the wonderful support and for your patience. This chapter finally deals with Castle telling Kate about the stalker. I've also added another flashback sequence which will continue into the next chapter as well. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: There would never be a hiatus to torture us all with. I miss them so much. Sigh.**

* * *

**Chapter 61 - Your Fragile Heart**

"Yo, Beckett, we got the financials." Esposito dropped a file on Kate's desk. "Our boy spent a lot of money on his secret. . . _honey_." He grinned, wriggling his eyebrows.

Kate glanced up and rolled her eyes. "Thank you, Hemmingway. How much are we talking?" She rubbed the back of her neck and paged through the paperwork.

The Hispanic detective propped his hip against her desk. "Oh, quite a bit. Check out the 11th – he spent about fifteen thousand at Tiffany's."

"Mm. How do you know it wasn't for the wife?"

He snorted. "They have two different addresses."

Kate lifted an eyebrow. "Oh. Separated?"

"Busy with divorce proceedings."

"I smell a motive."

The other detective winced and shook his head. "No can do, Beckett – wifey has a solid alibi. But we still don't know who _this_ mystery woman is. Maybe she had a motive. Maybe our vic didn't spend enough doe on her. Who knows?"

Kate shrugged and dragged a hand through her hair. "It's possible. Where's Ryan?"

"With the tech guys looking over the CCTV footage."

She nodded and gave her mug a forlorn glance. Damn, she missed coffee.

"Okay, when he's done, you guys go ahead and talk to his co-workers; focus on the secretary. See what you can get out of them. I'll talk to the estranged wife."

He nodded briskly and got up, already pulling out his phone.

"On it."

She sighed and stood up, grabbing her mug and resigned herself to making a cup of tea. Before she could make it to the break room, a uniform stopped her.

"Detective Beckett, this package just arrived for you at the front desk."

Kate frowned and took a folder from the officer. "Thanks, Martens."

She dropped it down on the counter and busied herself with making a cup of tea. Finally, she perched herself against the counter and reached for the folder. It was unusual for her to receive personal mail at the precinct. There was no return address or no indication as to what it could possibly be. Kate sat down at one of the round tables with her cup of tea and started to tear open the folder. Maybe it was some official document-

Photos. Of her family. With her and Lizzy's faces scratched out.

It felt like a bucket of ice water was thrown over her. A shiver crawled up her spine, her hair standing on end as she fumbled through the disturbing range of photos. In each, her face was scratched out and Lizzy's was either scratched out or marked with an X. Her hands were trembling, her whole body vibrating, her heart thrashing against the barriers of her chest.

The room was suddenly spinning and she could feel the bile quickly rising in her throat. Kate stumbled off the stool, a hand to her mouth and rushed to the bathroom. She crashed through the door and into a stall and heaved out the contents of her stomach. After a few moments, she staggered away from the bowl and sat against the stall wall, covering her face with shaking hands. She released a quivering breath and tipped her head back against the divider. She dragged the phone out of her pocket and called her husband.

He answered after a few rings. "Hey, honey. What's up?"

She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, her body still shaking. When she didn't answer immediately, Rick spoke again, concern bleeding into his voice.

"Kate?"

"Can you come to the precinct?" She blurted out.

He sucked in a breath, answer suspended for a moment.

"Yeah, yeah, of course." She could hear him moving in the background. "Are you okay? Did something happen?"

She swallowed, her throat working against the tidal wave of emotion.

"No, I-I'm fine. Just. . . I need you here."

* * *

"_I don't like this."_

_She sighed and flipped the tasteless red wig over her head. "Me and you both, Castle." She turned back to face him, plucking her service piece off the table._

"_Why does it always have to be you? Can't they get an officer to do this?" His mouth was in a pinched line, his brow furrowed, arms forming a barrier across his chest. She was quiet for a few moments, holstering the gun to the strap high around her inner thigh. Usually, he'd find that ridiculously arousing._

_But not so much now._

_His wife was dressed up like a cheap prostitute – overdone make-up, a very short skirt, fishnet stockings (how original) and an excuse of a blouse; basically just flimsy pieces of material covering the bare essentials. Any jackass with a pair of eyes could get a pretty good idea of how she would look like without any clothes on. His jaw tightened at the thought._

"_Because, Castle, I know this case better than any of these inexperienced officers and I have Vice background."_

_Their team was investigating a string of murders involving young girls who were working as prostitutes. They were coordinating with Vice on bringing down a human trafficking ring that had ties to the Russian mob – someone was ordering the killing of these girls._

_And now his wife had to enter into that world._

"_I still don't like this," he muttered unhappily. Of course, he couldn't be joining her undercover on the case because it was deemed too risky. Even the Captain agreed on that. The second Nikki Heat movie came out in a week's time and Rick had done his fair share of promotional work. They couldn't risk sending him in with Kate because some idiot might just recognise him. However Rick doubted that the Russian mob cared about some writer._

_But you never know._

_Kate pulled on a tacky leather jacket and adjusted her wig again. She made her way to him, touching his forearm. He immediately lowered his arms and reached out to curve his hands at her waist. She could sense the possessiveness in the way his fingers were nudging into her side._

"_I'll be fine, Rick. It's the job." He nodded, but still wore a frown. Kate cupped his cheek and brushed her lips over his, light and gentle. "Besides, you like my Vice stories." She gave him a saucy wink and grinned, waiting for the corresponding twitch of his mouth._

_After a moment, he relented and gave in to the lift of his lips – more for her benefit than his own._

"_Yeah, I do."_

_She smiled softly and rewarded him with another kiss, her smile caught in between his lips. He gripped her hips and roughly drew her closer. She was his. He growled and moved one of his hands to the back of her neck, holding the base of her skull, his fingers tangling in the fake hair of the wig. He marked her with his mouth, biting her bottom lip before driving his tongue into her mouth, swallowing her moan._

_Kate clutched at his shoulders, her body lithe and strong, but so petite against the ferocity of his in that moment. Finally, she gentled the assault of his mouth and swept her hands across his chest, pushing slightly until their lips unlocked wetly. He closed his eyes and took a deep, stuttering breath and then released her from his arms._

"_Please be careful," he managed to croak out, tangling his hand with hers and squeezing her fingers._

_She tilted her mouth into a smile. "I will, I promise."_

_He watched her walk away with a heavy heart, like a stone sinking to the bottom of a lake. He had a bad feeling about this._

* * *

"Caste - in here," Montgomery called, standing just inside his office doorframe. Rick hurried towards him, spotting his wife sitting at the desk. Kate's head was bowed down and a curtain of hair was obstructing his view of her face.

"Kate, what's wrong?"

She sat up slowly, her dark eyes finding him. Her face was carefully controlled, a mask covering everything she doesn't want to show. But he saw all of it – the clench of her jaw, the pulsing vein in her forehead, the faint sheen of moisture in her eyes, how her hands were balled up in tight fists. Rick gravitated to her, sitting down in the chair next to hers, immediately dragging her chair closer. She fumbled for his hand, gripping it tightly and desperately like it was a lifeline, a piece of solid ground.

"This package arrived for Beckett."

Rick turned to look at Montgomery; he was holding out a file. The writer took it from the captain – his heart rate spiking – and opened it. He blanched when he saw the photos.

Oh, God.

This was his worst nightmare. He scratched a few fingers across his pinched forehead and swallowed thickly. He paged through the few pictures and eventually placed on the table, his breath like a prisoner in the confines of his lungs.

"When did you get this?" He rasped, calm and grim. Kate shot him a look, her brow coming together.

"About an hour ago. We've had CSU dust for prints and any other fibres, but there was nothing on it."

Rick dragged a hand through his hair, his eyes glued to the disturbing photos. This was getting worse. His PI wasn't getting any closer to identifying who this crazy person was. And clearly the private security wasn't very secure.

Finally, he sat up and looked at his wife. She was rigid in the seat, but her hands were trembling and she was as white as a sheet. Shit. All of this couldn't be good for the baby. Oh, God, _damn it_. He had to tell her. He had to.

But she was going to _hate_ him for it.

He scraped a few fingers across his jaw, his skin catching on the coarse stubble dusted over his face.

"I know what this is about."

* * *

_She removed the NYPD jacket with shaking hands. Her skin felt hot, her cheek throbbing with pain, her busted lip smarting under any movement. Kate glanced at herself in the mirror – despite the broken skin and cut marks, she was as white as a sheet. Her top was ruined, ripped to pieces in the attempted-_

_She swallowed thickly and flicked her eyes away from her own disturbing, twisted reflection. She tightened her hands around the cold porcelain edges of the basin, hoping that it could absorb the shivers running through her body like an electrical current. Kate let her eyes fall shut for a moment, just concentrating on getting her breathing under control._

_But all she could see behind the lids of her eyes was the cruel face of her attacker, the scars on his cheek, the nasty twist of his mouth and his dark, lustful eyes. Her eyes popped open and she lifted a hand to her throat, feeling the phantom fingers closing around her neck, how it cut off her air supply. She could still feel the __abrasiveness of his skin, the callous hands groping at her. __She could still sense how his other hand had grabbed her shirt and yanked, tearing the cheap material and exposing her in the most intimate of ways. _

_How he forced his body onto hers, suffocating her with the revolting scent of sweat mixed with the smell of cigarettes and too much alcohol on his breath. She could still feel the wet, disgusting line he had licked up her throat, how the moisture stuck to her skin. How his hand tugged fiercely at the short skirt, ripping the fishnet stockings in the process. _

_Oh, God, he almost-_

_Without warning, Kate crashed forward and vomited into the basin, her stomach churning violently. Her head was pounding, the pain like claws digging into her skull. They got the bastards responsible for the murders and also the much needed evidence to close down the human trafficking ring, but it was too close for comfort. _

_Way too close._

_She didn't expect their suspect to take such an interest in her. Maybe it was because she was playing hard to get. Maybe it was the short skirt. Whatever it was, it turned him on. Before she knew it, the guy had gotten her isolated like some rookie and caught her off guard. When had she tried to break free, he landed a blow to her cheek - hence the bruise - and then another back-handed slap across her face. It left her dazed and vulnerable._

_Luckily, she had regained her wits before he could do too much and fought back, getting a black eye in the process. Eventually, they called in the team and arrested everyone - they had the information and the killer. She recalled how Esposito and Ryan had busted in and hauled her attacker away, using more force than was strictly necessary. Ryan had come to help her up, regarding her warily, but not saying a word as he draped his NYPD jacket over her battered form in a brotherly attempt to protect her modesty._

_Thank God Castle wasn't there._

_She exhaled a shaky breath and pushed herself back from the mirror, straightening her spine. Time to face the proverbial music._

* * *

"What the hell were you thinking?" She hissed, her eyes flashing. She was basically panting, her body thrumming with restrained fury. "How could you keep something like this from me?"

He held up a hand and approached her slowly. "Kate, I was just trying to keep you and Lizzy safe."

"By lying about it? By keeping me in the dark?" She growled.

"I didn't want you to have this on your plate as well. You're under enough stress as it is."

She rubbed both hands over her face. "Oh my God, I can't believe this," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "Damn it, Rick, I could have done something about this."

"I'm handling it," he barked, his face contorting.

She released an acidic laugh. "Yeah, and you're doing a great job, _honey._"

Ouch, that stung. Fine, he may have deserved some bitter backlash.

"Look, I have a security team on us at all times and a PI investigating things."

"Yeah? And how's that working out for you, Castle?"

He clenched his teeth to keep from lashing out against her. "They're working on it – they've already combed through the fan mail and identified a few potential red flags."

"Oh, really? Maybe things would go quicker if you decide to stop playing cop and get the _real_ cops to do this."

That was it.

"God damn it, Kate! Yes, I know I'm not the cop and yes you are the one with the professional training – as you so frequently love to remind me. But for fuck sake, you're my wife first! My _wife_! You and Lizzy – _our family_ – is my responsibility to keep safe."

She was shaking her head and bit her lip, her eyes teeming with tears. She turned her body sideways, orientating it to the windows and away from him, her arms folded across her chest.

"You don't get to make these decisions alone, Rick. You should have told me," she rasped, her voice like a fragile piece of string about to snap.

He deflated slightly and sank down into a nearby chair. He dropped his elbows to rest on his knees, wiping his hands over his face.

"I know. But. . . I thought - I _hoped_ - that this would have blown over by now."

They're quiet for a while, each dealing with the reality of the surreal circumstances.

"I have a plan B," Rick said, breaking the silence. Kate turned to him, lifting her eyebrows, her thumb caught in between her teeth. She usually chewed on her nails while deep in thought.

"So, what is it?"

He hesitated. "I don't think you're going to like it."

"I don't like any of this," she growled, throwing her hands in the air. "Spit it out, Castle."

"You and Lizzy get out of the city, go to a safe spot until we catch this nutcase."

She stared at him before shaking her head slowly. "Yeah, you're right - I don't _fucking_ like it."

"Well, what other suggestions do you have?" He shot back, standing up again. He was pacing back and forth. "Because the way I see it is that this dumbass isn't going to stop, Kate. Not until. . ." He didn't finish the sentence.

"Not until one of us gets hurt," Kate filled in softly.

"Or worse," he added grimly.

The detective tipped her head back and rolled her neck from side to side, feeling the tension infecting her muscles.

"So, we don't have another option. We _have_ to get out of town."

He nodded, releasing a bated breath. "Yeah, exactly."

She squeezed the bridge of her nose between two fingers. "Okay, the Hamptons is not that far-"

"No, not the Hamptons. It's too risky."

She dropped her hand, her eyes flinty as they bored into them . Her brow furrowed, her mouth pursed.

"Then where, Rick?" She asked in exasperation.

"Your dad's cabin."

* * *

_He stared at her, stock still and wide-eyed. She had texted him an hour ago that she was on her way home and that they had gotten their man. Except, she forgot to mention the part where she looked like a human punching bag._

_Kate dropped her bag and keys on the nearby table, completely oblivious to her husband's attention. She tried to remove her jacket, grunting in pain. Finally, Rick got his feet unstuck and hurried towards her, his heart thundering._

_"Kate," he breathed out, his voice like mist. She stiffened and slowly turned around, already knowing how he would react. He visibly flinched when he saw her battered face, his eyes dimming, shadows ghosting over his features._

_She attempted to build a smile for him, but it collapsed, demolished by the pain._

_"Hey."_

_He didn't reach for her, just flicked his eyes over her, his mouth twitching. He gave a hesitant step forward, tentatively lifting his hand before letting it fall away._

_"W-what happened?" He scraped out, a hand finally falling to her arm, cradling it between his fingers._

_God, she couldn't-_

_She swallowed, letting her gaze fall away for a moment. "One of the henchmen got the drop on me. He surprised me and we got into a. . . scuffle." She flailed a hand around her body; highlighting the bruised cheek, black eye and split lip._

_However, she neglected to mention the nature of her attacker's assault._

_He pushed towards her, breaking the unseen barrier and gently wrapped his arms around her. "God, Kate," Rick breathed out unsteadily. She could feel the shake of his head, his chin bumping against her temple, his hands jerking around her shoulders._

_"I can't - God, this was such a bad idea."_

_She puffed out a thin laugh, pulling back slightly to look at him. "Yeah, clearly."_

_He smiled for her benefit, a faint tilt of his mouth. He led her to the couch and sat down._

_"Are you okay? Where else does it hurt?"_

_She hesitated for a moment, but the intensity of his attention swayed her._

_"I'm okay, it's just. . .my ribs. He got a few punches in."_

_Rick visibly paled, struggling to keep his expression blank. His jaw tightened, his shoulders tensing._

_He screwed his eyes shut for a moment, trying to regain control. "Okay, I'll get you some painkillers," he ground out. He snapped his eyes to her again. "You got yourself checked out, right?"_

_She nodded. "Yeah, on the scene."_

_"Good, good." His hands were shaking. "Uh, what do - are you hungry?" He asked, the words stumbling out. He stood up, a hand rubbing the back of his neck. "I made some lasagna. You should probably get something in your system before taking medication."_

_She hasn't eaten since late morning._

_"Yeah, come to think of it, I'm actually starving," she answered around a frail laugh._

_He cocked his head and watched her for a moment. He lifted his hand to her beaten face, lightly trailing a couple of fingers along her jaw and up her uninjured cheek. He bent down and dusted his lips over her forehead, lingering for a moment._

_"I love you," he whispered, his breath caressing her skin. "God, Kate." He couldn't add anything more, the words wedged in his throat, his heart thumping too loudly in his ears._

_She grasped his wrist, her throat closing up. It was too much. The way he touched her - gentle and as if she was a gossamer thing. His fingers were dancing over her skin as if in supplication, in worship. In stark contrast, the bruises and broken skin spoke of a destroyed altar, a violated temple._

_But her husband couldn't know that._

_"Love you too." _

* * *

**A/N: The next chapter will follow directly from this one and will also include flashbacks. **

**Thanks for reading.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title: from Sleeping at Last's 'Turning Page'.**


	62. Chapter 62

**A/N: Thank you for all the patience and support. For that, I'm giving you a nice long chapter - the longest in a while. It continues on from the previous chapter and this story line will probably be resolved in two chapters.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own it and never will.**

* * *

**Chapter 62 - Dust to Dust**

"Here we are," Jim Beckett said softly as they turned into the driveway.

The truck came to a stop, softly skidding along the rugged ground path, stones rippling under the tyres. The cabin was big, but modest and cosy with a wide porch right around the property. It was a beautiful stone and wood house with a big fireplace, kitchen and three bedrooms.

Jim Beckett came out here a lot, so it was kept clean and in good condition. The only sounds were the hum of the crickets and fireflies and the soothing melody of the nearby stream of water. It was peaceful and, more importantly, secluded.

No one would find them here.

Rick and his father in-law got out first – Jim going for the luggage, while the writer went to open the door for his wife and daughter. Kate had Lizzy nestled in her arms where the little girl fell asleep an hour ago. Rick helped her out, his hand wrapping around her bicep and despite the tension between them, she gave him a tired smile.

"Thanks," Kate said quietly.

He returned one briefly and pressed a kiss against her temple by instinct, his lips like a soft breeze against her skin. He could feel how she briefly stiffened and bit back a sigh.

This fight wasn't over.

He let her go and watched as she huddled their daughter closer to her chest, murmuring in the little girl's ear. Her steps were slow and measured, her shoulders slightly hunched. He knew that posture. She was beyond exhausted. Meaning she was also frustrated.

Rick rubbed the heels of his hands across his eyes, feeling the day's stress pushing down on his shoulders. He startled when he felt a large hand on his shoulder.

"Come on, son, grab a bag. Let's get you inside." Jim shot him a muted smile.

Rick nodded and picked up the bag. He paused for a moment. "Jim. . . thank you. You have no idea how much better I feel knowing you're going to be here to look after them."

The other man tilted his head, his grey eyes all too knowing. "No need to thank me, Rick. Especially when it comes to my daughter and granddaughter."

The writer bobbed his head and released a breath.

"Now, come on. I'll go make us some hot chocolate."

"That's the best suggestion I've heard all day," Castle muttered.

* * *

_Kate startled when she heard the knock against the door. Her eyes flew open and she shot up, water sloshing around in the bathtub and cascading down her body._

_"Kate?"_

_Her heart thumped, the blood rushing loudly in her ears. She lifted a trembling hand to her chest, breathing out slowly. _

_It was Rick. Her husband. Not a Russian mobster trying to-_

_"You okay? You've been in there for more than an hour. I know you love baths, but, honey, this is a little excessive."_

_He tried to keep his tone light, but she could hear the undercurrent of worry still lingering. He had watched with that same concern while she ate, followed her to the bedroom like a shadow and probably would have sat with her in the bathroom if she hadn't put her foot down. _

_"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," she called back after a moment, her heart rate slowing down. "Sorry, I must have nodded off."_

_She could hear his laugh, a low rumble reverberating straight into her limbs. "Not the first time that's happened." She grinned. It was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "Uh, Kate, can I come in? Please."_

_His voice had a raw quality to it, his tone honest, baring his fragile heart. He mistook her silence for a negative answer and rambled on. _

_"Look, I know you said you needed to be alone, but I need to be near you." _

_Her breath caught, tears slowly pooling in her eyes. She bit her lip and stood up gingerly, stepping out of the tub. _

_"I need to _see_ you," he continued softly, his voice thick with emotion. "Please."_

_She opened the door. He sucked in a breath, eyes widening, flicking over her body involuntarily. "I'm right here." She touched his arm, wrapping her cool fingers around his wrist and pulled him to her._

_Rick immediately wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. He bit back a groan at the feel of the smooth, wet, naked skin and soft curves against his body. He wanted to put his mouth to that skin and wash away all of the darkness and filth and shadows of that world. _

_But she was shivering violently._

_"Hey, you're cold," he murmured, his breath like a phantom over her skin. _

_He pulled the big, fluffy robe off the back of the door and wrapped her in it, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. He lifted her chin and brushed his mouth against hers in a chaste kiss, mindful of her split lip. His hand migrated from cradling her chin to enveloping her cheek, gently brushing the tip of his thumb along the edge of her swollen eye._

_God, he wanted to _kill_ that bastard. Cut off his fingers – one by _fucking_ one. _

_He took a slow breath, trying to dispel the homicidal impulses. He hooked an arm around her neck, burying his hand in her wet hair at the base of her skull, cradling her in the cove his body. He pressed a kiss against her forehead, lingering there for a moment, his eyes fluttering shut. He could feel her fingers digging into his shirt, gripping it, like she was holding herself together._

_"Come on," he murmured after a while and shepherded her out the door. "Get dressed. I'll clean up in here." He jerked a thumb towards the bathroom. She didn't oppose him and silently walked into their bedroom, shoulders hunched. _

_He didn't like that. She looked fragile, carrying the weight of the world on her delicate shoulders. _

_"Kate?"_

_She turned around, her brow furrowed. "Yeah?"_

_"What happened to-" He stopped, his mouth snapping shut and teeth grinding. She could see the jaw muscle jumping under the strain. "What happened to the bastard who did. . ." He gestured to her, his hand flailing around. "-this to you?"_

_She sucked in a breath. Her fisted her hands and released them slowly. "Ryan and Espo got him off me and arrested him," she answered eventually._

_He nodded briskly, his eyes dark and thunderous. "Okay." It wasn't enough. He wanted the son of a bitch to pay-_

_"Don't worry, Castle, they roughed him up a bit," she said with an amused lilt to her voice, breaking into his murderous thoughts._

_He blew out a breath and relaxed his posture. He rubbed a hand over his face and through his hair. _

_"Good. That's good. I owe them."_

_She watched him for a moment, watched the struggle play out over his face. Kate walked towards him and before he could say anything, she had her arms around his neck, her body hovering close to his – like the ebb and flow of the ocean. _

_She kissed his jaw, her hand migrating to his collarbone, fingers fluttering along his pulse point. _

_"You don't have to do anything, Rick."_

_He grunted, the desperation clawing at his throat. His hands flexed around her shoulder blades, his fingers digging into the taut muscle there._

_ "I wasn't there-" _

_She shook her head and covered his mouth with her hand, three fingers guarding his lips. "Stop it," Kate commanded softly. "All you need to do is be here – right now." She held his eyes, so blue, but burdened with shimmering tears. In that moment, Kate resolved to shield him from what really happened. _

_At least for a while. _

_"I'm okay," she lied, her mouth slanting into a heartbreaking smile, her whole face aching with it. "I'm okay."_

* * *

"I'm going to put Lizzy in bed," Kate announced once they got inside the cabin. She barely glanced at her husband before taking the stairs up to the bedrooms. Rick watched her go and sighed heavily. He plopped the bags to the ground and sank into a nearby chair.

Jim's eyes flicked between his daughter's retreating form and her husband's slumped one. Yeah, it didn't take a rocket scientist to sense the tension that still lingered between the two of them. It was apparent the moment he met them at the loft. He had hoped that Katie's icy demeanour would thaw on the three hour drive up to the cabin. And that his son-in-law would stop looking like world was about to end.

He kept his eyes on the younger man and sat down across from him, the dining room table in between them.

"She'll get over it."

Rick's head snapped up, his features strained.

"Katie," Jim clarified. "Don't worry too much about it, son. She'll forgive you."

The writer let out a wry smile and rubbed a hand across his scruffy chin. He shot his eyes towards the staircase.

"Yeah, not so sure about that right now," he sighed, his eyes still fixed on the stairs. They were quiet for a few moments, the silence roaring all around them. Everything was enhanced here, every sensation sharper – the night was blacker, the stars brighter, the moon bigger against the night sky.

Time stood still here.

"When Katie was about nine years old we went ice-skating. Just her and me," Jim said, breaking the silence. His face softened into a smile. "I remember we went one Sunday morning. Her mother was sick and not very keen on the idea of our skinny, clumsy little kid going out on the ice, but she begged me to go and I relented."

Rick smiled at the image of a nine-year old Kate with pigtails hounding her dad with that raw Beckett determination to go ice-skating.

"We've done it once or twice before with no incident and I thought it'd be fine." He paused and chuckled, sitting forward and resting his forearms on the table, his hands clasped together. "Boy, was I wrong."

Rick was intrigued and scooted forward. "What happened?"

Jim flicked his eyes to his son-in-law with a wry smile. "Long story short – Katie stubbornly insisted on going solo on the ice and fell. She broke her arm and got a nasty blow to the cheek. Needless to say when we got home four hours later, Jo wasn't very happy with me for a week or two."

Rick smiled, but soon grew sombre again after a few moments. "This is not just a broken arm, Jim. It's their lives. Our _family_ is being threatened by this." He paused, wetting his lips, his brow furrowed. "And it's my fault."

The older man watched him quietly before answering. "Rick, I completely understand what you feel – that urge to protect them and to keep them safe. Hell, I even understand why you would want to keep all of this from Katie. But that part about it being your fault is just, well. . . bullshit, son."

Rick shook his head, swallowing thickly. "That's just how I feel about this. If it wasn't for me-"

"-Kate would never have understood how wonderful her life could be," Jim interrupted. "She would have drowned in her mother's death. You were the best thing that happened to her. To _our_ family." Jim Beckett sat forward, his grey eyes pinning Rick with their intensity."Rick, do you have any idea how much my daughter loves you?"

The writer didn't have a response to that, the air was sucked out of his lungs.

Jim continued without giving Rick the chance to respond. "She'd do anything for you. You know her. You know how deeply she loves. Yes, she is hurt now. Yes, she is licking her wounds and shutting you out. Yes, she will be angry for a while and she will resent you, but eventually that will fade." He gave Rick an uplift of his mouth.

"Talk to her, Rick. In my experience, women respond to that kind of thing." He winked at the younger man before getting up. "Now how about that cup of hot chocolate I promised?"

* * *

_He wasn't checking up on her. He_ wasn't._ He was just a sweet husband bringing his wife her coffee and pastry dish. _

_And maybe gauge how she was faring. _

_They had a _tough _few days after the. . . incident (as he referred to it in his mind). Her injuries were much better, but Kate wasn't sleeping or eating well. And for some reason, every time he would try to touch her, she would flinch and avoid him._

_"Yo, Castle, what brings you here?" Esposito called out in greeting as he and Ryan emerged out of the conference room._

_"Yeah, you here to avoid writing again?" Ryan ribbed with a large grin._

_Rick offered them a sheepish smile. "No. I thought I'd dropped by and bring my wife a belated breakfast."_

_"Oh, so nothing for us?" Esposito questioned with a smirk._

_"Sorry guys. Beckett is my only ball and chain," he shot back with a wink and clever grin. The other two detectives chuckled. _

_Rick glanced around, confused for a moment. "Speaking of which – where is my wife?"_

_The other two men's smiles slowly faded. Ryan rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding the writer's eyes. Esposito crossed his arms and sat down on the nearby desk._

_"It's ten, Castle. She's probably at her therapy session," Ryan said quietly, his features strained; something weighty in his gaze._

_Wait, what?_

_"Therapy session?" Rick asked confused. "I – why?" The moment he said that, Esposito tensed, his face becoming stony._

_"What do you mean 'why'?" _

_Ryan also stared at the writer, his forehead sliced into a frown. Rick glanced between the two men, utterly confused and at the same time terrified at what this new information may mean._

_"She got into a fight with a suspect – it has happened before. She didn't need therapy then. Why now?"_

_"Because it wasn't just a fight, man," Esposito growled, his face contorting in anger. _

_Rick's frown deepened, his heart thrashing wildly. __"What are you talking about? What's going on?" He swiveled his head between the two men. "Kate told me that the guy got the drop on her and that they got into a fight. Nothing more. So what the hell am I missing here?"_

_The two detectives briefly glanced at each other. "Let's go in there," Esposito suggested, ushering Rick towards the conference room. __Ryan closed the door and fell back against it, his eyes not meeting Rick's._

_The writer dropped the coffee and pastry onto the table, immediately forgotten. He was in full-blown panic mode by now. _

_"Guys, please. Just tell me."_

_The two detectives shared a look. Finally, Ryan pushed off the door and lifted his head to look at the writer. He clenched his jaw and took a breath before answering._

_"The assault was sexual in nature." The Irish detective let out a trembling breath. "It was attempted rape, Castle."_

_The writer felt his knees give out and he staggered into the conference table. His hands trembled, his mind reeling from the new information._

_"No, no." He shook his head in disbelief. "I- I don't-" He covered his face with both hands, his stomach plummeting. He couldn't stop the visions swamping his mind - how the son of a bitch had his hands all over her, how he hurt her, how he tried to force himself on her. _

_Castle's jaw clenched, his heart jerking inside his chest. After a few moments, he inhaled deeply and dropped his hands. His face was white, eyes dark. _

_"What happened?" He asked very quietly._

_Ryan shrugged, looking concerned. "We're not sure. Probably like she said, they got into a fight. But the guy obviously thought she was a. . . a prostitute."_

_Esposito sighed, his features softening. "We got there in time, Castle. Before he could-" The detective couldn't finish the sentence, his eyes dropping to the floor. _

_"I'm sorry, man. We thought you knew," Ryan added softly. _

_Rick dragged a few fingers across his forehead, his head resting in his hand. Eventually he lifted his head and stood up slowly from the table. _

_"Don't tell Kate I was here," he rasped, not glancing at the two men. _

_Without another word he walked out the door._

* * *

"Lizzy asleep?" He stood just inside the threshold and watched her, holding two cups of hot chocolate. Kate glanced at him and simply nodded as she continued to get their bed ready.

"Your dad made us some hot chocolate."

She didn't look up at him. "Thanks," she said quietly as she arranged the blankets.

He stepped inside and sat her cup onto the wooden dresser, smiling faintly at the the carved out heart and 'KB' inside it on top of the dresser. He traced it with his finger and turned around, leaning against the solid wood. Kate was putting on fresh pillow cases, her brow pinched and mouth stretched into a thin line. He continued to watch her silence, sipping his hot chocolate.

After a few quiet moments she finished and looked up, brushing a hand through her hair.

"I'm gonna take shower."

Okay, enough silent treatment. He got about four hours of that so far. When she passed him to into the bathroom, he intercepted her and caught her hand. She shot him a look, a fire coming alive in her eyes.

"Kate, we need to talk." He looked at her, serious, eyes intent.

She sighed and looked away. "I don't want to-"

"Well, too bad, because we're going to."

She tugged her hand free from his. He didn't try to take it back. "So, I guess I have _no_ say now in the decision-making concerning this family?"

He dropped his head, wrapping a hand at the back of his neck. He looked at her again. Kate clenched her jaw and wrapped her arms across her chest.

"Look, I messed up by not telling you and I'm sorry for that." He stepped closer, his face taut. "But I'm _not_ going to apologize for trying to keep my family safe."

Anger flashed across her features. "Yeah and look how that turned out, Rick." She threw her arms in the air. "God, it just made things worse."

"You don't think I know _that_?" he growled, his voice like a blunt, hard, unforgiving rock. "You don't think I know _all_ of this is my fault?" He was breathing hard, his pulse jumping erratically, his whole body rigid with tension.

She was about to respond when something he said made her stop. Kate's mouth fell open in question and she cocked her head, a frown taking shape on the landscape of her forehead. She lowered her arms and took a step closer.

"What do you mean that all of this is your fault?"

His posture relaxed slightly, but his face remained a stone mask. "If it wasn't for me, there wouldn't be a psycho stalker threatening our family," he said evenly, matter-of-factly.

Her features slowly thawed into a blend of sympathy and pity. She took another step towards him, reaching out a hand and wrapping it around his broad wrist, her thumb brushing along skin and the crest of bone there.

"Oh, Castle." She could feel her eyes welling, her chest constricting. She saw it clearly now, how burdened he was with the guilt and responsibility. He dropped his head and swallowed thickly.

"You big idiot," she whispered around a choked laugh. He shot her a confused look, faint traces of hurt lingering on his face. But she just shook her head and squeezed his hand, her eyes misty.

"If it wasn't for _you_, we wouldn't be a family."

* * *

_She still hasn't told him. _

_It had been two weeks since he found out from the boys what truly had happened. She had been continuing as if nothing had changed, like everything was normal. He had been watching her very closely, waiting for her to confide in him. In moments spent just quietly lounging on the sofa or those few minutes in bed before they fell asleep, but he got nothing. _

_Not a word. _

_He would be lying if it didn't hurt. It sliced him open, splitting him apart to know that she went through something like that and didn't trust him enough to share that burden. _

_Yeah, it hurt like a motherfucker. _

_"Castle? Did you hear me?" _

_He snapped his eyes to her. She gave him a bemused smile, arching her brow and shaking her head at him. He couldn't help but stare. She was adorable in her pink sleep shorts and his old, plaid buttoned shirt. Her hair was taking up in a messy bun on top of her head, strands of hair dangling off the cliff of her jaw. Her lip was completely healed and her other bruises were much better by now, her black eye had faded considerably. _

_"Mmm?" He hummed before taking a sip of his coffee._

_She gestured to his half-empty plate. "You done?"_

_"Oh, yeah. Thanks."_

_She frowned as she took it, giving his half-eaten plate a confused look. "Was something wrong with the cheese grillers?"_

_"No, no," he quickly answered. "It was great. Thanks, honey." He shot her a smile. Obviously he didn't want to tell her how he was constantly plagued with worst case scenarios about her attack. And it didn't help that she wasn't talking to him about it._

_She walked towards where he was sitting, coming to stand in between his legs. She draped her arms around his shoulders and gave him an upward curl of her mouth. __He smiled back, waiting on her. _He kept his hands modestly on her waist. He had been careful to keep his touches light and without suggestion. It didn't keep him from wanting to slide them underneath her shirt to caress the warm, soft skin spanned across the protruding hipbones. 

_Kate leaned forward and gave him a delicate kiss, a tender brush of her lips against his. She moved her hand to his collarbone, tripping her fingers over his skin. Her eyes followed the movement, lip suddenly caught shyly between her teeth. Rick watched her curiously._

_Finally, she flicked her eyes up to him, shooting him a bashful look. Entirely too cute. _

_"I'm gonna go take a shower," she said softly, her eyes sparkling. "You wanna join me, Castle?"_

_Oh._

_His whole body was screaming yes, but his mind was reeling. They haven't. . . not since. . . and she still hasn't told him about what really happened. His fingers twitched around her waist, his heart clattering against his rib cage. _

_He cleared his throat. "Uh, why don't you go ahead, I'll clean up here," he said casually, giving her a lopsided smile. Confusion flickered across her face, her brow furrowing for a moment. She gave her head a shake, her mouth curving slightly, slowly revealing her teeth._

_Kate stepped closer, her body drifting close to his, her chest bumping into his. _

_"Maybe you misunderstood me, Castle." She put her mouth next to his ear and Rick had to close his eyes to the sensation of her breath skimming along his skin._

_"I want you." _

_Her voice was like a siren's call, ripping his insides to shreds, his self-control teetering on the edge of destruction. Before he could say anything, her mouth was on his. The kiss was anything but soft and harmless; it was ferocious. She pried his lips open with her tongue and took his mouth hostage. It was an unrelenting barrage, a ruthless siege that he happily surrendered to. His hands slipped down from her waist to her hips, sneaking beneath her shirt, his fingers flirting with her skin._

_He wanted her too. So, so badly._

_She was panting and moaning into him, her passion seeping into his skin. Kate clawed at him and tried to pull the shirt over his head. He scraped all of the little self-control he had left and put both his hands on her face, gentling the kiss before pulling away completely. He didn't want to risk hurting her or doing something that would upset her._

_"Kate," he breathed._

_She tried to pull him along with her, her hand wrapped around his fingers. _

_"Come on."_

_He didn't move, flicking knowing eyes to her, his jaw clenching. Finally, after she shot him a confused look, he simply just shook his head. She dropped his hand and crossed her arms, hurt flickering to life behind her eyes._

_"What's wrong?" She questioned softly, a vulnerability shadowing her tone._

_He took a few moments, sighing, and brushed a hand through his hair. "Tell me what really happened."_

_She frowned. "What are you talking about?"_

_"The night you were beaten up. What really happened?" He slowly rose to his feet now, his mouth stretched into a thin, downward line. _

_Kate visibly paled and dropped her arms. "You know," she exhaled, her voice like a turbulent wind._

_"Yeah." He nodded, just a quick, furious bob of his head. "I had to hear it by accident from the boys." The undercurrent of resentment sprung to the surface._

_She lowered her head, her lip arrested between her teeth. "I'm sorry."_

_"They knew, Kate, but for some reason you didn't tell me that that son of a bitch tried to rape you. Why is that?" His voice was loud and harsh now, anger mixing into his words._

_Her eyelids quivered, slowly sliding down to cover her increasingly misty eyes. _

_"Because of this. . . reaction," she sighed, the words breaking apart outside the cave of her mouth. _

_He gritted his teeth, his brow tweaked. He slowly shook his head from side to side. _

_"Kate, we've been married for almost two years now. We've known each for almost eight. How can you not trust-?"_

_"This is isn't about trust, Rick," she cried. _

_"Then what is this about?" He threw his arms up, pinning her with a look._

_She scraped a trembling hand through her hair. "I don't want you to look at me differently."_

_He frowned at that. "What do you mean?"_

_She was quiet for a few moments, the seconds stretching by. Tears were slowly and almost reluctantly descending the precipice of her cheek._

_"Look at me like I was tainted," she murmured, barely audible. "That I was less. Treating me like a victim and not your wife." She let out a timid, joyless laugh. "Which is exactly what you are doing."_

_It was like a punch in the gut. He stood there, gaping at her in silence. She thought that he would think less of her? That she was somehow 'damaged goods'? He got his feet unstuck and quickly strode towards his wife. He wrapped his arms around her without saying anything and crushed her to his body, absorbing the sobs wracking her frame. _

_Castle rubbed a hand up and down her back, his fingers drawing soothing circles against the tense muscles between her shoulder blades. __His lips floated across her skin in a tremulous kiss. He docked his mouth next to her hear, lifting a hand to her neck, harbouring his palm against her fluttering pulse._

_"Kate, I love you," he whispered, his voice low. "I could never look at you like you were anything less than extraordinary." He lifted her chin, skimming her cheek with a light kiss. She blinked rapidly, her dark lashes adorned with tiny drops as they swept against her skin._

_"Look at me," he commanded softly, gripping her chin gently between his fingers, brushing his thumb across the peak of bone there. __She redirected her eyes back to him; a hue of green and brown with a hint of gold._

_"Do you believe me?"_

_She bit her lip, her mouth quivering. "I'm sorry." _

_He shook his head. "Don't apologize anymore, Kate." He put both his hands around her face, his thumbs brushing underneath her eyes, catching the moisture clinging to her skin. "Do you believe me when I say that you are extraordinary? That I could never think less of you?"_

_She nodded meekly. He kissed her, only a graze of his mouth against hers. He migrated his lips from her mouth to her jaw and traveled them up to her cheek, leaving a trail of kisses._

_"Do you really believe me?" _

_His arm was wrapped around her waist as she rested against his chest. She let out a guttural moan, her head falling to the crook of his neck, her hands fisted in his shirt. _

_"Because I love you so, so much it aches." He had to swallow, his throat burning. "When you hurt, love, I hurt. It devastates me to see you like this," he said, his voice faltering, breaking apart. He pillowed his forehead against hers, his blue eyes teeming with tears. _

_"Don't shut me out. Please."_

* * *

"I'm still mad at you," she murmured, breaking the silence. They were sitting side by side on the bed, staring at the stars painted across the black night sky.

"I know," he sighed.

There were another few moments of quietness before Kate spoke again, her voice delicate.

"I though it was me."

He turned towards her, confusion drawing a line in between his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

She licked her lips, fumbling with her fingers. "When I saw the photos, I thought it was because of me." She glanced at him, her eyes dark and opaque. "I though it was my fault. Because of one of my cases." His mouth dropped open and he pivoted his body completely towards hers. But before he could say something, her next words took the winds out of his sails.

"I thought, for a moment, that it was because of my mom's case."

The air rushed out of his lungs, his mouth going slack. He stared at her. Idiot. He's been such an idiot. After a few moments, he launched himself to her, enclosing her to his body.

"God. Kate, I'm sorry. I'm _so_ sorry."

She shook her head and pulled back. She offered him a unsteady smile. "It's okay. To tell you the truth, I was half-relieved when you told us about the stalker."

Kate worked her jaw for a moment before continuing. "But we're a team, Rick. I need to be your partner in this. So, please, please don't shut me out again," she whispered, a ferocity coating her tone. Her eyes were bright, glimmering with moisture.

"I won't, I promise," he said softly.

She offered him another muted tilt of her mouth and stuck out her hand. "Partners?"

For the first time in hours, Rick truly smiled. He took her hand in his and pulled her to him. They sealed the agreement with a kiss.

"Partners."

* * *

_[][][]_

_All your actin'_

_Your thin disguis__e_

_All your perfectly delivered lies_

_They don't fool me_

_You've been lonely, too long_

_Let me in the wall, you've built around_

_And we can light a match and burn it down_

* * *

**A/N: I hope it was enjoyable. It was a challenge to put all of it together. Just want to say that the end of this doesn't mean that Kate has completely forgiven and is fine with everything. Of course, they are going to struggle with the consequences of this.**

**Apologies for any grammar/spelling mistakes.**

**Title - from the Civil Wars' song, 'Dust to Dust'**

**Lyrics - from the Civil Wars' song, 'Dust to Dust'**


End file.
